Don't Trust the Cut

by Kade Boehme

Tucker Gray is a Baltimore, MD waiter, hailing from the deep south, whose mental health issues and past relationships have made it hard to trust more than the cut. After he hits what he thought was rock bottom Tucker decides to keep close to the ones who stood by him and keep his head down, until he finds something to prove it can get better.

Jesse Bauer is unsure what his future holds after an injury forces him to retire from the marines. With all of the decisions he has to make in his civilian life with all of its freedoms and possibilities, he feels staying closeted and keeping the people in his life happy will keep down the chaos.

Until the night he met Tucker Gray at a party he thought that’d be possible, but both of them are instantly and strongly in lust. As their relationship grows Jesse has to prove himself and Tucker has to learn to trust more than the cut.

Genres: M M Romance, Contemporary, Romance, Military Fiction, Disability, Drama, LGBT

208 pages, Kindle Edition

First published July 2, 2013

About the author

Kade Boehme is the epitome of dorkdom, only watching TV when Rachel Maddow or one of his sports teams is on. Most of his free time is spent dancing, arguing politics or with his nose in a book. He is also a hardcore Britney Spears fangirl and has an addiction to glitter.

It was after writing a short story about boys who loved each other for a less than reputable adult website that he found his true calling, and hopefully a bit more class. He hopes to write about all the romance that he personally finds himself allergic to but that others can fall in love with. He maintains that life is real and the stories should be, as well.

Reviews

[Monique · Rating 4 out of 5]

Kade Boehme a few months ago, impressed me with his short story On the Dock. Don’t trust the cut is completely different and proves his versatility as a writer but what is breathtaking about his writing for me is his characterisation… these characters are very real, their lives for a short time touched mine and their journey pulled on my heart strings and evoked all kinds of emotions, he has great empathy with his characters and so much emotion from someone so young it is remarkable! Kade’s writing style is also that of a young man, so emotionally he connects with them… Kade Boehme is a rough diamond, not quite polished, poignantly beautiful at times, yet grounded in the reality of youth with all the raw pain, hurt, laughter and love that goes with it… I am looking forward to watching this man grow and what an exciting journey it will be.

Tucker Grey is a country boy, and when we meet him he is swathed in emptiness yet contemplative, the feeling is that of loss, slight hope for his future and deep regret over his attitude and behaviour. At this point we have no idea of his past only that he is one of three guests of honor at a party to celebrate his return from “Canada”? along with his friend Nate’s birthday and a soldier returning home from Iraq. When we meet Jesse Bauer he is an angry man, bitter at being injured and retired after ten years in the Marines, a job he loved, but also a job that gave him somewhere to hide from himself and life's expectations. He has a girlfriend Miranda but he hides his sexuality behind his relationship, one she is aware of but really she was his camouflage in the real world.

When these two catch each others eye, “eye sex” per Alison his best friend… I love her! The attraction is instant they both feel it, making Jesse uncomfortable with Miranda and Tucker embarrassed to be feeling that way over a man that was obviously straight!?! Only they kiss and that more or less seals the deal and bells were ringing! Only it is twelve months and many nights of fantasies for both, unable to forget that chaste kiss, that they meet again and those fires are still stoked! …yep, a couple of horny teenagers spring to mind!

Ok.. so we have all been there in our younger years, or even our not so younger years, that school girl/boy crush the infatuation or even love, yes, that plain old insta love … we have all fallen victim to it at some point in our lives. The intensity of it all, nervousness, the feeling of being self conscious as though the whole world can tell, admonishing ourselves for seemingly stupid remarks, the butterflies and heavy heart… but mostly it is just a constant whirl of emotions… daydreaming, tummy flutters at every thought, anticipating and playing out future meetings in our minds and all of that emotion is played in this book. That chemistry between two people, is the foundation to this story, eyes meet across a crowded room and they just know… but don’t start drawing hearts round this just yet! What I like about this book, is that  Kade Boehme makes it feels real, believable.. the helplessness, as if your control and common sense have taken a hike and you have none, you are consumed with every waking thought and night-time fantasy revolving around that one person. Just to be in close proximity, to have a glance, anything for the chance or opportunity to just be in the same space can make you buzz with the excitement of their nearness.

Tucker and Jesse love each other, that is as plain day, but still no hearts and flowers because this is a bumpy ride! These men are both very flawed and damaged and in Tuckers case a broken man trying desperately to put the pieces back together. Complication he does not need yet we see both men through misconceptions, stubbornness insecurities and the decisions they make cause no end of trouble and more often than not left me feeling WTF! and I was angry with them and hurting for both of them, frustrated because they spent the first half of the book hiding behind lies and omissions and they pretty much worked me up into a frenzy I was so cross!

Tucker is painfully shy and socially awkward, and he has no friends apart from Alison, whom he lives with. Alison is his rock, she grounds him and certainly takes no shit and definitely won’t allow him to wallow in self pity. In her presence he is alive and we see the man he can be when not in the depth of the depression that can engulf him. He works in a local restaurant so when Jesse turns up for lunch all those feeling from that night of the kiss return, in fact they never left, and when Jesse wants to reach out as a friend that attraction is what drives him forward knowing Jesse is in a relationship but just wanting to be near him and spend time with the man that makes him feel, if only as friends.

Jesse’s attraction hit him head on and asking for Tuckers number makes him feel like a love sick teenager. But he is in a relationship with Miranda he has never hidden his attraction towards men from her, but it is a very different case for the rest of his friends and family so like Tucker, he just wants to spend time in the company of the man that he wants to wrap up in his arms and take away the fear and haunted expression he see’s in his eyes.  But Jesse is also drowning in his own insecurities being pushed and pulled by his mother, Miranda and her parents… six years and still they were not living together and no sign of marriage, it was expected of him but his sorry excuse “being too young” was just that, an excuse!

Jesse hated the complications of it all, as a Marine he followed orders his life had structure and purpose and it was also a way of hiding what he really desired… he is closeted and a coward! Is it that he doesn’t want to disappoint? Is he living the life expected of him? Scared of accepting his sexuality? Anything for an easy life? Does he really know what he wants? …his life is built on lies and omissions, being dishonest with himself, Miranda and Tucker!

Whilst Tucker was happy to suppress his attraction with Jesse and go along with the pretence of friendship, because lets face it they both knew they had the hots for each other… and so did Miranda, so her wanting to be best buds with Tucker also was sending up all kinds of alarm signals and it was quite frankly making me uncomfortable.

Tucker is insecure. painfully shy and he is attracted to Jesse, knows he is closeted and the feelings between them are mutual… frustrating! Being friendly with Miranda, was that a security blanket for Tucker? …being friends with her, is it a way of justifying to himself that he can just be friends with this couple? Then there is Miranda… Ohhhh she knows what's going on, she likes Tucker, I mean who doesn’t he is adorable and has that look of helplessness that everyone seems to want to protect and take care of… but be friends with the man that you know your boyfriend has the hots for… no, that’s just wrong! …as nice as Tucker is. For Jesse… Is he trying to convince himself he can just be friends? or is he wanting any opportunity to be in the presences of the only person that actually makes him feel alive… and not the puppet playing his part to the audience!

And in the middle of all this we have the little bull dog, Alison, fiercely protective of her friend and she is certainly not shy in coming forward and has a habit of saying it like it is, regardless of the consequences… I loved her and she certainly made me laugh out loud in the middle of all this madness!

We finally see hope, each man coming to terms with their relationship and being sensible and taking it slowly… Jesse mans up and and has a break with Miranda to try and “find himself” Tucker, so open and giving is happy to go with the flow but his heart is big and he is wearing it on his sleeve and allowing that hope to take root but there are still secrets that need to be shared!?!

The last part of the book was heartbreaking and had me in tears, the love between these two men is palpable it jumps off the page at you it’s so strong and intense, and that’s what I liked so much about this book, yes we have the insta love thing, but their journey to get to their HEA was fraught with challenges and intense emotion, heartbreak and some hard lessons in life. Yet through it all the one constant was always their love!

This book was provided by the author in exchange for a fair and honest review

[Simsala · Rating 1 out of 5]

DNF 28%

I don`t want to spend my precious reading time with nerve-grating, hair-tossing females on every page.
I don`t mind the (understandably btw...) jealous girlfriend , but I DO mind the one-millionth version of the butch best friend/roommate with Florence-Nightingale-Syndrome.
It`s a taste thing - no rating.

EDIT

I just got lectured by *beep*, that Alison is based on a real life friend, this book is largely autobiographical and this little rant offended *beep*.
What can I say - apparently I have to love and appreciate Alison (and the book) , keep my evil trap shut AND have to be some kind of seer.

Dear *beep*, I still don`t like Alison, I don`t care if my little rant is offensive to *beep* BECAUSE I`M NOT A SEER, I don`t care if I`m right or wrong, pink or yellow, NOW the book gets its well deserved ONE star rating.

A friend of mine (love you, Sweetie!) tried to calm me down, but I`m not exactly a nice person when being angry....
But be assured, I won`t touch any other book from *beep* with a ten foot pole, I promise.

Edit, the second...

The "beep" deleted *beep* comments here on the thread. Says everything there is to say...

[Heather K (dentist in my spare time) · Rating 3 out of 5]

**3.5 stars**

I have to admit, I wanted this book to be good SO BADLY. I thought that this author had so much potential from his other two works that I read before this one so the fact that this promised to be a polished, professional book got me ridiculously excited.

However, when I first started this book, my heart felt like it was sinking. I don't love books that begin a relationship with cheating (yes, I consider a kiss cheating) so I was positively beside myself thinking that this book would end up not being my style. But... as the book went on I felt myself being won over more and more. From about 40% was a turning point for me.

Let me start off with what I liked. I think once I got used to the author's writing style, I found it to be refreshing and easy to read. I know that that doesn't sound like much of a complement but sometimes authors can tend to write on the flowery side and get caught up in too many words. Sometimes I don't want to read something that seems like a thesaurus was used on every page. Kade's writing is much more abrupt and to the point, which I ended up enjoying very much.

I also really loved the character of Tucker. Give me a flawed, damaged, hot man any day! He was sweet and funny and vulnerable and sexy. I felt a real connection to him. And who wouldn't love Alison, the wonderful best friend who only has Tucker's best interests in mind? I think the author did a great job crafting these two.

I also loved the last 20%. Yes, there is a misunderstanding that factors into the ending here, but unlike some other reviewers, I didn't really mind it. It worked with Tucker's history and made sense to me. Even some of my favorite authors put misunderstandings in their story as plot devices, and even though I don't prefer them, it didn't bother me as much as I would have guessed. The reason I REALLY loved the last part of the book is because my emotions were ratcheted up to an 11! I was overwhelmed with feelings.

What didn't I like? I didn't like the character of Miranda, and not because I thought she was a bitch. I don't mind a bitchy character if the story calls for it. I didn't like her character because I thought (especially in the beginning) that she was too inconsistent. She was described as both really nice and a gossipy, country-club, stuck-up type. Well, which one? I didn't know why Tucker and Alison wanted to be friends with her at all and vice versa. I didn't get the relationship. But mostly, I didn't get her relationship with Jesse. She was his beard, more or less, right? But the also had sex? But she knew that he was into guys? But she wanted to marry him? I kind of got it more towards the end but I didn't get the dynamics. It seemed naive on Miranda's part and strange on Jesse's part. She also did some really manipulative things and then people still said she was nice? I didn't quite grasp who she was as a character. I think with a little more re-working at the beginning, the author could have made her character make more sense.

I also didn't love how Jesse and Tucker started out (yes I said that before), but not just with the cheating. Their relationship in the beginning seemed a bit forced.

Though this book wasn't without flaws, I ended up really really enjoying it. The book as a whole improved so much as it went along and I couldn't put it down after the halfway mark. This is my favorite effort thus far by this author and I have very high hopes for his future books!

[Monika · Rating 5 out of 5]

THIS IS NOT A REVIEW

Some will think this is me standing up for this author again but it is actually me standing up for every author that has been treated poorly.

To all those that think bullying, name calling and attempts at spreading the word that this author's work should be ignored, I'd like to thank you, the saying "there is no such thing as bad publicity" couldn't be more true.

[Meep]

Just from the sample Tucker feels too precious, his issues are layered on too thick for me to be able to connect with him, I can't see his character for his issues and they've not even been fleshed out yet.

And Miranda, poor woman, clearly being set up as uber-bitch; without reading on I feel sorry for her. Living her life as a beard for eleven years and being used for sex; I don't care if he made his preference clear, thats one hell of a mixed message.

It could improve but I'm not sold on it.

[BevS · Rating 5 out of 5]

Kade, I'll begin this review by saying that I'm absolutely chuffed to bits for you that you've signed with a major publisher, and as for this book 4.5 stars and . I loved it!!

As I've read every one of Kade's books (is that check in the mail yet??) , I've noticed a marked improvement in his writing with each book, and I knew from reading his updates for this one that he was really excited about it...and you were quite right to be!!

My review isn't going to be a huge one...check out Monique's to get the gist of the story.

Jesse and Tuck were great together, the old coup de foudre/lightning strike working it's magic once again. Jesse, used to being in charge of his life as a former marine, had had to retire on medical grounds, and although he had a girlfriend Miranda (hiss!), had also had a closeted relationship in his school days with Zach, but when he saw Tuck at a party, he was a goner...as was Tuck. They suited each other so well, Jesse feeling relieved that the decision to come out of the closet and have a boyfriend had been taken out of his hands by fate, and Tuck, well Tuck was all kinds of mixed up but such a gentle soul, kind and hardworking having suffered dreadful physical abuse in an earlier relationship, he took to self-harming and had spent time in a psychiatric ward, he just needed someone to be there for him and he was as drawn to Jesse as Jesse was to him from the moment their paths crossed....like bees to honey.

Of course, lots of things conspired to get in their way, namely Miranda...oh and that complete bitch of a mother that Jesse had... but there were some really good people who did help them, namely Tuck's best friend Alison (what a woman she was, fabulous!!), Nate and Mike, and I did warm to Miranda in the end.

The huge misunderstanding between them towards the end of the book had me in tears thinking about the pain that both of them were going through...and this is where I'll leave my review.

Kade, many thanks for this book my friend and here's to many more!!

[Mark · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book deals with real life; ugly warts and all! Real emotions, real reactions, real trials and tribulations. Reality is not pretty sometimes, but happiness can be found if you're prepared to fight for it.

I liked this book at lot due to the fact that it doesn’t give one-sided characters, the characters are very real and complicated but then again that’s life. For me this book didn’t just have the standard two MCs, but four main MCs. That’s why I’m going to start my review with by looking at the characters individually.

Tucker – recovering from a past he’d rather forget and put behind him, makes him strong but yet insecure. When he meets Jesse for the first time not knowing how to handle the situation he bolts for the door like a scared rabbit even though the attraction is there. Anyone who has ever experienced love at first sight will know that feeling when someone looks at you, where your legs are like jelly and you get the proverbial butterflies in your stomach. Even when Tucker meets Jesse a year later at the restaurant where he works at, the feelings are exactly the same. Due to this encounter he becomes friends with Jesse and Miranda. Although he knows that Jesse is with Miranda he still feels the pull and lets his feelings guide him. At the beginning of their relationship Tucker sees it as just a good thing while it lasts, but has no delusions that due to Jesse’s history it’ll probably all come to an end at some stage. He feels he can’t trust Jesse completely as he is just trying to come out of the closet and could bolt back in there again should he not be able to deal with it. As time progresses he realises that it is more than a fling and sees the change in Jesse that he feels responsible for. However, he is still not able to tell Jessie about his past and this becomes a major stumbling block later in their story. His stubborness and jumping to conclusions will be his undoing. Tucker is a loving sole looking for a home, someone he feels he can love and trust for the rest of his life. But this trust isn’t easily given for reasons I could totally understand. This doesn’t become really apparent until near the end of the book. But this problem is there from the beginning, accompanying him, underlying his every motive. We even know from the first chapter that the Canadian holiday is all a ruse for the real reason he had been away.

Jesse – is your stereotypical closeted gay. He couldn’t be more in the closet with the doors securely shut if he tried. This all stems from many factors, his being in the marines; fear of rejection from his mother and friends, a very real situation. I felt sorry for Jesse, trapped, scared, not happy inside, fearing rejection from the people he cares about. Although he knows deep down he is gay, he is just trying to lead the life that everyone expects of him. This may seem very noble, but in the end it will lead to no good, he will unintentionally hurt people around him even more by not being honest with himself. Then he meets Tucker who turns his world upside down and gives him the strength to do something about it, knowing he will never be truly happy in his life until some ground breaking revelation takes place. Tucker is that revelation. Tucker gives him the strength to recognise what has been staring him in the face all this time and to do something about it. He knows he’s been living a lie all this time, but has been too scared to do anything at all about it. Yes, it probably isn’t fair to Miranda in the beginning, but then what’s fair? That’s life. I’ve met enough married men in gay bars in my time too due to the usual reasons of “the wife is away for the weekend” or “I’m just in town for the week,” blah, blah, blah! Needless to say I steered well clear of them as it would only lead to grief with all the baggage these sorts of guys carry around with them. Unfortunately, in Tucker's case he couldn't. There are all sorts of reasons, either they’re bi and just want to fool around or they are trapped with so many responsibilities they can’t make that jump to coming out. But this isn’t just a gay thing, how many women have had affairs with married men who keep promising them they’ll leave the wife and kids, etc. and never do! Jesse’s story is a real coming out story, with all the fear and angst that goes with it. He turns his world inside out. I know through my own experience how excruciating this can be and fear of rejection is a real big deal, especially when it involves your parents, no matter how old you are. I’m glad to say that with my parents this was not the case, but all too often gay men and women are totally rejected by their parents even in this day and age. This process is also a slow one and doesn’t happen over night. You first tell friends and then find the courage to start to tell the family. Here Jesse first confides in a good friend, Nathan, to see what his reactions would be. Thank goodness Nathan is accepting and still sees Jesse as the friend he has always been. To be honest I did it exactly the same way myself. Therefore the first part of the book dealt with this whole situation perfectly, didn’t rush it and gave it the time necessary to develop. Jesse gets there in the end but it’s a long journey and Tucker giving him the reassurance he needs, not by instructing him or telling him what to do, but just by being there for him, non-judgemental, caring and letting him just be Jesse. So Jesse is a very real and believable character. He goes through big life changes, comes out the other end and makes it!

Alison - What a woman! Witty, sassy, intelligent, caring and protective; everything you could wish for in a best friend and more. Although she may appear originally to be a little ditsy, you soon realise that there is a more serious character beneath the façade. Alison was my hero. She obviously cares a lot about Tucker’s welfare, but this is the most natural thing in the world for a caring best friend. She is obviously someone who cares enough about Tucker that he doesn't get into a situation or the state where he was before. To be honest Tucker's Alison is exactly like a very good friend of mine. We do absolutely everything together. I can talk to her about everything; she comforts me, kicks me up the ass when needed, makes me reflect on my actions, is honest with me and listens. We do all sorts of crazy funny shit together that maybe is only funny to us but we don't care (thinking of the kitchen routine between Alison and Tucker with the music when Jesse comes in), go shopping together and give each other fashion advice, etc. Basically she cares about me just like Alison does with Tucker. Like a sister really and I do the same for her. As real close and best friends love each other in a special way. OK, it was mentioned a couple of times that she flicked her hair, but hell which girl with long hair doesn't? I know my friend does out of habit occasionally, doesn’t mean I think any less of her. Although Alison is suspicious of Jesse’s motives at the beginning which is natural enough, totally ends up accepting him after she’s satisfied Jesse is genuine and good for Tucker. A good judge of character and I was happy to read she also found her soulmate in the end. I could feel the unconditional joy Alison had in knowing that Tucker was truly happy after such a long time. I loved Alison, a real good friend to have when the chips are down.

Miranda – Miranda, oh Miranda! A woman with many layers, complicated and not the total bitch everyone would like her to be. That would be all too easy. At the beginning Miranda for me was your typical girl who only wanted the fancy wedding, house, children, golden retriever and trophy husband. She obviously thought she would have this in Jesse, but alas this was not to be. The dream was to be shattered. She knew about his past love affair with a man and his time in the marines, before they got together, but believed that she could be happy with Jesse, even though there was always an underlying doubt. Living in a relationship with doubt is never going to be good. Even I have been down the cover girlfriend path, here referred to as Jesse's beard. After Jesse meets Tucker she obviously sees this as a trial for thier relationship and forces him in Tucker’s direction, by encouraging boy’s nights, etc. only to see if Jesse can resist temptation. Scheming to say the least. That was the first dumb thing she did. Then she makes friends out of Tucker and Alison again I reckon to see how Jesse behaves around Tucker. Another trial by fire for Jesse. Tucker and Alison were friends with both Jesse and Miranda before their relationship really gets underway and although Tucker is Jesse's catalyst, still remain friends with Alison maybe out of a sense of duty. This happens, you make friends with a couple and then they split up, you don't want to take sides as you're friends with both, but it is very difficult to remain completely impartial in these situations.However, Alison gets the measure of Miranda early on and develops what I would call a “love-hate” relationship, but always on guard for Tucker’s sake. When Jesse breaks up with Miranda she is obviously upset and hurt. Who wouldn't be? She still appears at Tucker’s and Alison’s house to talk to Alison, but then again I reckon this was only a ruse to try and find out what was going down. Alison remains guarded and knows exactly what the ulterior motives are. Then one night she comes around on a surprise call and finds Jesse kissing Tucker in the kitchen, she remains composed and externally doesn’t seem to be affected by it, but this is all show for a plan that she has concocted to get her own back on Jesse. Extremely calculating! Basically revenge by the jilted lover by any other name. When she invites them all to her birthday, I was thinking, WTF! But then the birthday party arrives and the plan becomes all too clear. Tucker and Jesse are there and she invites Jesse’s mother, yep, all hell breaks loose when Jesse’s mother discovers he’s having an affair with a man. This was a hateful and spiteful plan on behalf of Miranda, but she was hurting and this can make people do horrible things. Although in the end she probably did Jesse the biggest favour of his life. Enough time passes and we find out that Miranda had an affair while still with Jessie, so there's a great case of the pot calling the kettle black! However, in the mean time she also manages to get herself in the family way and thus became a fallen angel for her parents, experiencing rejection for herself first hand. Divine retribution if you ask me. Time passes and is a healer and when she meets Jesse again and tells him the news about her pregnancy then obviously enough time had passed that they could talk to each other again putting their pasts behind them. Can ex-lovers become friends? Well, it has been known to happen. However, her predicament mellows her and she becomes really forgiving of Jesse and what he did. Therefore the path is cleared to make a new start of being just good friends. Do people change? Well, I would like to think they do and Miranda became more forgiving after she got over the initial hurt. Miranda goes through several transitions which is probably hard to accept but becomes a better person due to it.

The story - for me this book almost seemed to have two distinct parts. The first half deals mostly in my eyes with Jesse's emotional turmoil and his coming to terms with who is and coming out. A big change for anyone and these things do not happen overnight. Therefore the slower pace is OK and it did still keep my interest. Tucker is the catalyst, but never forces Jesse to do anything in a rush that he may regret later. Although try as Tucker might to keep things as a light hearted affair, the lad had fallen heed over heels for Jesse but tries to deny it to himself out of self-preservation and not wanting to get hurt again. This develops the story nicely, understanding where these two characters have come from, Jesse's journey is necessary in order to understand what comes later. I could feel the emotion and internal struggle both these characters were having for very different reasons. Jesse coping with his eventual coming out and Tucker hiding his ghosts of the past from Jesse. There's no doubt these guys are in love, but neither can admit it to each other at this stage. The question is did Jesse cheat on Miranda? Well, if you think kissing is cheating then maybe, but I think the more troublesome problem was Jesse living a lie for the reasons I stated above which would eventually destroy the relationship anway. So Miranda you could say had a lucky escape before she tied the knot and the responsibilities become even more, making things even more difficult to to cope with.

In the second half of the book the pace picks up and the proverbial shit hits the fan. First at the birthday party and then later Jesse discovers Tucker's secret and comes to confront him with it, even if it was well intended Tucker couldn't deal with it and shuns Jesse away thinking he's doing him a favour and releasing him from his own fucked up world. Here Tucker cuts his nose off to spite his face. Here we see the stubborn and unreasonable Tucker. Although the hurt on both sides is big neither seem to be able to accept each other's reasons for their behaviour. Much later Tucker meets Jesse at an event with pregnant Miranda in tow. Jesse and Miranda have obviously buried the hatchet, but Tucker immediately jumps to all the wrong conclusions and sends him hurtling back into that place he had so long fought to avoid. This is where Jesse's tenacity, patience and love for Tucker pays off and they find their way back to each other again. But this time it's solid and for keeps. This part of the story left me completely wiped out with emotion, sheesh what a roller-coaster ride this was.

This book has many facets to contend with, is intricate and complex. Almost autobiographical in its nature, the book deals with many ups and downs of four characters. The only character that remains steady as a rock and a tower of strength through all of this was Alison. A safe harbour in a storm. Whatta girl! This story takes place over a long time, maybe even over a couple of years and I just felt that this was handled a little clumsily. The timescale could have been handled a little more logically and I felt at times I had missed months with no clue to as where we actually were. Almost like a mental blank out. This is only a small personal observation which has stopped me giving it four stars. But this doesn't detract from the wonderful and powerful writing, the emotion was palpable and left me emotionally drained. Kade's style is not overly flowery, but he manages to convey a power of emotion in his words that I really love. The characters were realistic and just as complicated as any real life situation. Whether we understand this or not for me doesn't matter. That's life. A great book and I will look forward to more from this author.

Another great buddy read with Tina, Macky and Gina

[JustJen "Miss Conduct" · Rating 4 out of 5]

Review written for Hearts On Fire Reviews

This story starts off a bit slow and takes a while to get going. Early on, we meet Tucker and his friend, Alison. Tucker has some serious issues, but Alison has stuck by Tucker’s side through thick and thin. They live together, have an amazing friendship and manage to get along beautifully, even though they have very different tastes.

Tucker first meets Jesse at a party (of which he is actually one of the honorees). Sparks fly for both of them when they see each other, though neither one goes out of their way to actually meet the other. They accidentally run into each other in the bathroom, wherein they share a brief kiss before Tucker runs off leaving the party.

Jesse has just returned from Iraq, medically discharged from the military due to a shoulder injury. In addition to attempting to come to grips with his recent life changes, Jesse is also dealing with his current relationship with Miranda. Now, he has apparently been clear with her from the get go that he was interested in guys. I was never really sure why she stuck with him, especially when she knew he was basically using her as a front in regards to the military. Throughout most of the story, Miranda is quite a bitch. She’s extremely superficial, hoity toity, seeming to care more about appearances and gossip than anything else.

When Jesse and Miranda run into Tucker at the restaurant he works, Jesse decides to befriend Tucker. Tucker allows the friendship to grow, knowing that is all it can ever be due to Jesse’s relationship with Miranda, whom he and Alison are now friends with as well.

As you can imagine, that spark they always get when they see each other never goes away. When things seem to be on the same page for these guys, Jesse realizes he needs to make some big choices and decisions in his life. This is the point where the story picked up for me. They were finally interacting and moving forward.

Unfortunately, there was a lot more to Tucker’s issues than previously thought. We finally find out more details about them, the causes and resulting events. I won’t go into any more than that, but his reluctance to trust Jesse with his secret, after Jesse had given up so much to be with Tucker, whether by choice or circumstance, ended up causing some major problems that sort of avalanched into the big event that I am sure will bring many to tears.

This is the point where the title of the book is worked into the story, and I have to say, I absolutely loved how that was effectuated. For the most part, this story was beautifully written. Though it did seem overly orchestrated at times, everything had a purpose to reach the conclusion. While I didn’t understand or agree with the way certain things played out, I could not fault the writing. If you’re looking for something to sink your teeth into that will pull at your heartstrings, give this one a try. I’ll definitely be looking for more from this author in the future.

[Tina · Rating 4 out of 5]

Kade Boehme impressed me with his short story On the Dock. Don't Trust The Cut was his first full novel that I've read. To be honest it took me a while to get into the story, to get a feeling for the characters, but the second half of the book blew me away, it was over way too soon.

Jesse and Tucker meet at a party that their mutual friends have thrown for them. Tucker is returning from a vacation in Canada, that's the cover story for disappearing off the radar - and Jesse is home from the Marines after an injury ended his military career. An encounter in the restroom leads to a kiss that both of them can't forget. Tucker is coping with a very troubled past, he is self-destructive and as he thinks, no relationship material.



Jesse is instantly attracted to Tucker but he is in a relationship with Miranda. He has never hidden his attraction towards men from her, but the rest of his friends and his mom don't know his sexual preferences. As a Marine he is used to following orders, his life has structure and he hides what he really desires. His insecurities keep him from living his life. But what happens when he meets Tucker? All he wants is to wrap up this sweet guy in his arms and take away the haunted expression he sees in his eyes.



“This is my favorite place." Jesse was holding his hand, looking out over the bay. Tucker’s bay. His peaceful place in this world...

Jesse - the wind blowing in his face, smiling into the sun with his eyes closed — was probably the most beautiful thing Tucker had ever seen.
Jesse turned and looked at him with the softest gray eyes and a smile that was pure joy. “Thank you for showing me.”

Those eyes. The sun. Jesse was fucking golden in that moment with the sun and the water behind him…


This book moved me more than I expected. I absolutely fell in love with Tucker and Jesse. Tucker especially touched me, his deep wounded soul and his shy, quiet character...Tucker, the sweet countryboy. :)

And I liked Alison, Tucker's best friend and roommate. She is witty, sassy, loyal, fierce and protective of Tucker, but what are friends for? I would love to have a friend like her. A really well written and intriguing character! She cares enough about Tucker that she does everything in her power to protect him when he sees no other way than to seek refuge in self-mutilation.

Don't Trust The Cut is a very serious, well-written story with several interesting characters. Kade did an excellent job with addressing a difficult subject matter so sensitive. It kept me on the edge of my seat wondering what would happen next. I’ll definitely be looking for more from Kade in the future.

Highly recommended to those who love hurt/comfort stories.

Thanks again Gina, Macky and Mark for an awesome buddy read and many thoughtful comments. :)

[.Lili. · Rating 5 out of 5]

Don't Trust the Cut by Kade Boehme is the story of Tucker and Jesse. Tucker, is a man fighting his emotional demons. Jesse, is still coming to terms with being gay. Although, he doesn't question his sexuality, he is afraid of coming out to his homophobic mother and friends.

I loved this story. I love the depth of the characters and the realism with which the topics were handled. Did the characters frustrate me? Yes. There were a few times there where I groaned and not from pleasure. At the same time though- I think this is what would've happened had it been real life. It wasn't a simple love story- it was story about friendship, patience, trust, compassion, and understanding.

I did want to address the bad editing comments I read in other reviews. I really didn't see anything wrong. Granted I'm not by any means a part of the grammar police (as you can tell from my review, lol). Going into it I was expecting to see a bunch of mistakes but I didn't. Maybe he self published it originally and then was picked up by Loose ID? I'm not sure. Just wanted to throw it out there in case that was the reason you hadn't given this story a chance.

In the end, this was another winner from Kade Boehme. He is fast becoming a favorite author of mine and is an auto buy now. He truly is a wonderful story teller. 4.5 heart warming stars ♥

[True Loveislovereview · Rating 5 out of 5]

Man... did someone grow up in this story. That was a great read.
In the beginning just somewhat light with a little gut feeling.
Tucker a shy sweet guy and Jesse the big militair. When there eyes meet BAM firework.
But they have a long way to go. Tucker is out and Jesse.....well that's just complicated.

Then the boys finally come together and Jesse ahh Jesse starts to grow and burn bridges and comes out and his whole world turns upside down.

But Tucker withdraw and has to be honest and can't find a way to tell Jesse why he always wears long sleeves.....
Tucker gets smaller and uneasy and just makes a huge nosedive and it's get ugly and painful.
Jesse gets taller and bigger and his heart beats only for Tucker.

Jesse has to convince Tucker about his deep feelings for him to finally become what both want to be....just happy together and love each other.... one day at a time.
Wonderful written story. With a lot of love. Heartbreaking sometimes, heart-melting sometimes. Feelings all around.
It has a good writing flow and a very convincing storyline. And that title......


"I feel like after one damn day at a time, it’s finally our day.”

Re-released https://www.amazon.com/Dont-Trust-Cut...

[Gina · Rating 4 out of 5]

Buddy Read with Mark, Tina, Macky and Bev!!!

Kade Boehme first came to my attention when i read his short story,On The Dock that little gem blew me away.

This is the story of Jesse and Tucker, who meet a party given for the both of them. Tucker has been away and his friends are given a cover story. In truth Tucker is dealing with some very tough issues and his trying to get his life back together. Tucker doesn’t feel his is worthy enough for anyone to care for. Tucker is dealing with some serious mental issues and during this journey of healing he finds himself attracted to Jesse.

Jesse is trying to acclimate to life after an injury forced him out of the marines. Jesse is also in a relationship with Miranda, whom he has never lied to about his attraction to men, but because of “Don’t Ask Don’t Tell” used Miranda as his beard.

I enjoy a story with meat to it, something that pulls at my heart and this story certainly filled that need. While i struggled through the first half of this book, the second more than made of that. And I must say i loved the Tucker’s best friend Alison. What a very cool, protective, seriously loyal friend she was to Tucker! I loved this woman!

This would be a 5 star for me except i had a problem with Tucker and Jesse not talking to each about what was going on. Lack of communication kept them from settling quite a few issues between them. And although i understand this happens in relationships, i find this a pet peeve of mine personally in books.

This was a tough subject and i am impressed with the way the author handled the subject. I will continue to follow this author and his books.

[Lauren · Rating 3 out of 5]

I know I've only rated this 3 stars, but it's not a bad read. It's partly my own fault, because I generally stay away from m/m romance stories where a MC has a girlfriend to start with. That's always a bit of a problem for me. Then there was all the confusion and misunderstandings in this story which really started to bug me. I ended up skipping through quite a bit because I didn't want to read all their rambling thoughts and instead wanted to get to the good parts.

Since I don't want to sound too negative about this book, I'll list a few things I did like:

- Tucker was amazing. Yes, I absolutely loved him. He was a complete sweetheart, and my heart ached for him.

- I loved Alison, she was an awesome secondary character and genuinely made me laugh out loud a few times. She was also insanely loving and protective of Tucker, which was so nice to read.

- The writing was really good. I can't fault that at all. Sometimes I have a problem with the way authors write, where I just can't connect with it, or I'll notice loads of mistakes. I didn't have any problems here. It really was very well written.

- The dialogue was great; the best parts for me were when the characters were being witty and funny and cute. I loved the playful banter between Tucker, Alison and Jesse.

- The last 20% (from chapter 17 onwards) was pretty amazing. It was so emotional and heartbreaking. I actually cried a little. I felt that the author dealt with Tucker's issues with his self-harm and bipolar, and it's reappearance at the end very well.

- The epilogue was really lovely. I'm so glad we got to see Tucker and Jesse a couple of years on, and although it showed that things hadn't magically turned easy, it still gave us a really nice HEA (because they both really deserved it).

So yeah, it really wasn't all bad. In fact, a lot of it was pretty good.

One thing I didn't like was Miranda. Jeez, Miranda pissed me off like you wouldn't believe. At first I thought I was just being weird, because she seemed nice enough. I didn't want to hate her, either. She'd been wronged, and I actually wanted to feel bad for her. I couldn't figure out why I hated her so much. And then she basically showed me why I hated her. I was seething! What a spiteful bitch! Seriously, I was so mad I nearly put the book down. And when she reappeared at the end and was all nice and apologetic, only to reveal that she'd been cheating on Jesse anyway! What the actual hell! Bahhhh. Okay, rant over. I just had a tough time forgiving her.

I'm sure others will enjoy this. Like I say, parts of it were really good. On the whole, it wasn't quite what I had hoped, but I'm still glad I picked it up and gave it a go. I'll be checking out more from this author.

[Macky · Rating 4 out of 5]

BUDDY READ 2013 WITH TINA, GINA AND MARK
3.5* rounded up.

When Tucker Gray and Jesse Bauer meet at a friends party both are surprised at the instant attraction they feel for each other and when they come face to face in the restroom, within minutes they share a kiss. The problem is both guys are carrying a hell of a lot of emotional baggage and this leads to a less than smooth ride on the path to true love. At this point it isn't the time for either of them to pursue the deep feelings but twelve months later they meet again and it becomes clear to jesse that this is really who he wants to be with and harder to keep away from each other.

Tucker is a vulnerable soul, hiding both physical and mental scars he shys away from the world, protected and fiercely supported by his sharp witted and true best friend Alison, and Jesse is caught in an emotional tug of war between his deep attraction for Tucker and his need to hide behind a lie which keeps him closeted and caught up in a relationship with a woman - Miranda - who even though she knows she is only a smokescreen uses emotional blackmail to keep him tied to her.

The first half of Don't Trust the Cut felt a little slow but when it hit the halfway mark, that's when it took off for me, when Jesse decides he really wants Tucker and they take the physical side of the relationship to another level and the book hots up quite a lot, by this time I was feeling the connection that had slightly eluded me at the start.

There's a lot to like about this emotional story but every now and then I found myself questioning some of the actions that certain characters took during the course of the story and each time they concerned Miranda. Obviously written as the books ' baddie ' we aren't supposed to like her and I suppose you could say without her the book wouldn't have the emotional impact it has, but I thought she was a very manipulative character and was surprised that nobody in the story including Jesse, didn't see or anticipate the massive fallout from her actions.. I was on the outside but I knew she was trouble from the word go and could see it coming a mile off. There were times when she made me feel a little bit less about the other MC's and I didn't like that. I felt no guilt at all not liking her character but when she had me questioning the characters I did like it made me feel a bit ' off ' and ultimately it took a bit of an edge off the story as a whole.

Then there was the big emotional upheaval at the end, it was heartbreaking and I can understand everyone saying it left them feeling drained but it could have been sorted if only they had communicated ... This is a pet peeve of mine ( so my own opinion ) about these types of big misunderstandings. There's a big glaring miscommunication that again should have been anticipated by certain people and instead of explaining straight away its left to stew for a while causing more heartbreak and misery. I was practically shouting at my Kindle at the end!! The epilogue was lovely and soothed my ravaged senses so I did end on a more satisfied note and was saved from throwing my Kindle across the room! Lol.

Overall it would have been a 4 star rating but for the niggles that Ive talked about so Ive gone down half a star but rounded up for the quality of kades writing.

Thanks again to my lovely friends Mark, Tina and Gina for another illuminating buddy read. Always fun with you guys.

[Vanessa North · Rating 4 out of 5]

I discovered Kade Boehme through goodreads when i read a couple of his reviews which coincided kind of exactly with my own thoughts on some books. I did the "compare books" thing, and on books we both had read we were in something like 90% accord, so, yay...imma follow his reviews. Then i see he's from Atlanta, my adopted hometown. Then i see he's a writer too.

Support the home team, i make plans to read homeboy's book.

Well, i don't know what i expected, but this book moved me. I read it in one sitting, and just absolutely fell in love with tucker and jesse. Tucker especially touched me, because let's face it, no one writes the south like someone who has lived and loved this wonderful, crazy, messed up bless your heart world with all it's imperfections and perfections--seriously, y'all, the south pwns biscuits and gravy and everyone else can just go home.

I loved tucker's southern flavor and kade's unique voice, and can't wait to read more.

[Cory · Rating 4 out of 5]

This was my first book from this author and I really enjoyed it even though it dealt with some tough subject matter.

It did take me a little bit to really get into it, but once I did I was really into the story and both Jesse and Tucker.

Likes:

Alison - Tucker's best friend and roommate. She didn't have a filter when she spoke and I usually agreed with everything that came out of her mouth. I thought she was sassy and witty as well as fiercely loyal to Tucker. I really liked her a lot!

Jesse - I loved his internal struggle with his feelings. I liked how he reached out to Nate to talk things over. I thought it was great how protective he was of Tucker. And he never really said anything negative about Miranda even when she was being a complete bitch to him.

Tucker - I liked that he was flawed and I thought his playfulness, even though somewhat shy, was very endearing. He was always skeptical, with reason, and found it hard to let people in as he didn't want to get hurt. I really enjoyed the times when he let himself be free to just enjoy the moment with Jesse. He knew that he was falling for Jesse, but he didn't want to let himself do it because he knew in his mind that it wouldn't last. I really just wanted to give him a big hug!

Mike - A co-worker of Tuck's. He wasn't in the book too much, but the parts he was in really struck a cord with me because of how honest and forthcoming he was. He wouldn't let Tuck get away with saying something sarcastic to avoid the subject at hand and he made it clear that he didn't give a shit that he way gay. He was a true friend.

Nate - I liked how Nate was friends to both and helped Jesse work through his issues, while reminding him that he needed to tread carefully with Tucker, but didn't fully explain why as it was Tucker's story to tell.

Dislikes:

Miranda - Although she did grow on me a little in the end, I spent most of the book disliking her. I thought she was phony and cared more about what others would thing about her rather than factoring in anyone else's feelings. I thought she was sneaky and calculating and was more worried about getting Jesse back than wanting to see him happy.

Jesse's Mom - I was crushed when he had the first conversation with her and she made her feelings quite clear on where she stood on the gay issue. When she found out she didn't really handle the situation with much grace.

As for the story, I really did love it, although it did take a pretty dark turn near the end which might be a little hard for some folks to read if they have issues with cutting and self mutilation. It was pretty bad...like over 100 stitches bad and Tucker nearly died as a lot of alcohol consumption was involved as well.

All in all I really liked this one and will definitely read more from this author. Thanks to Mishyjo for reading with me and for picking this one for me. She knows me so well!

[Sheryl C. Nash · Rating 5 out of 5]

Read it, loved it, got my heart stuck in my throat and cried for most of it... It's 2.15 am and I'm typing this on my piece of crap iPhone, so 'nuff said for now! Kade Boehme, I was not expecting this when I picked up this book... you may not know me from a bar of soap but I have followed you on Goodreads from wwaaaaaaayy back, and to see how far your writing has come is awe-inspiring... CANNOT WAIT to see what you come up with next!!!

[Christelle · Rating 2 out of 5]

Hmmm….I’m a fan of Kade Boehme so I was startled not being able to get into this story.
I couldn’t figure out the MCs. Add to that the way the MCs met : for me, it involved cheating and this made me uncomfortable. It didn’t work for me on a lot of counts.
But I’m still really eager to read the next book from this author.

[Chris · Rating 3 out of 5]

I enjoyed this one and thought Tucker & Jesse were great as a pair. Tucker was vulnerable and had issues while Jesse was coming to terms with coming out and being honest. Miranda the "beard" for Jesse was a bitch and I had no love for her - I thought her sudden pregnancy was unnecessary and it's why I dropped a star, it felt so random. There was a great flow to this book and easy to read

[Silkeeeeeereads · Rating 4 out of 5]

3.5 STARS

Sweet story with a little bite of angst and a tough subject.  It will pull on your heart strings a hair. 

[Bitchie · Rating 4 out of 5]

I really enjoyed this one, I just had a couple of little niggles. 1. Tucker goes into the pub, orders a draft beer, Jesse gets caught up watching his fingers holding the handle of the mug, then minutes later, Tuck is peeling the label off his beer. Mugs don't have labels. Then 2, it's late, and Tuck offers to sleep on the couch while Jesse sleeps in his bed, but just a few days/weeks ago, Jesse and Miranda sleep over in their guest room. Why would Tuck need to sleep on the couch if there's a guest room?

I know, nitpicky shit, but it bugged me. The story was really good, angsty, the way I like it. I would have liked to have known more about Tucker's past though, like when he became a cutter, and about his former, abusive relationship. We really got no details, other than that he was a cutter and had an abusive ex.

[Suzy · Rating 4 out of 5]

Really enjoyed reading this - loved Tucker and just wanted to give him a great big hug and lots of love (but Jesse has it covered). Very emotional read with some great supporting characters - Alison, Mike and Nate - was really not sure what to make of Miranda other than she was lucky they were all still friends with her by the end of the book. Sensitive subject very well handled - nice one Kade x

[Ann · Rating 5 out of 5]

Wow - that was a rollercoaster of heartache, damage, laughs and love.

It took me a little time to get completely invested in this book. Not because of the writing or anything, I think I just didn't quite realize the depths this books would dive into. After reading on and realizing that the first part was a necessary setup to completely appreciate the story, it made sense. The first part gave the setup to what could have been pretty stereotypical characters. Closeted ex military, his beard, sweet and shy loner, his sassy best friend, etc. Since all of those characters have been done before I didn't really think much more was coming besides some angsty painful coming out moments, throw in a few misunderstandings and the HEA. It was obvious that Tucker has some serious issues, there just wasn't enough info at the time to truly understand him.

Which, after reading on, turned out to be a good thing. Because - wow, once Tucker and Jesse met up again and became involved in one another lives the characters found their depth and everything was not what it seemed. Sure, the basic outlines of them were the same, but they became so much more than what their stereotypes would have scripted for them. I'm so glad the author let us know Tucker first before going into his past. He deserved to be known for the man who 'wanted to make it different this time' and not be judged. Even though much of his past was out of his control, it would be hard to separate the two and it wouldn't have been fair to him. Very few of the other characters knew much of the real truth from his past, but they merely encouraged and didn't push him to open up to Jesse.

The same could be said for Jesse, but it didn't work out that way for him. It was very interesting how, while Tucker was given the benefit of the doubt for his actions, most everyone automatically thought the worst of Jesse at every turn. He never really did anything 'bad' in fact he did a lot of things that were 'good', but because everyone pretty much knew his story and he was very honest about the changes he was trying to make in his life, it was assumed he would be following the expected stereotypical path of a character like his instead of the one he was trying to forge for himself.

I liked that. The guy who truly thought he had the most to hide (Tucker) gets pigeonholed the least and is left to move things along at his own pace and the guy who was really hiding up until then (Jesse) gets judged right and left and pushed from every direction.

There were two points that didn't completely click for me. One was the character of Miranda. My friends have always been more of the Alison type (maybe not quite that fun unfortunately) so I don't really get her country club set and their motivations, etc. She was obviously very smart and successful so I didn't understand what she was waiting around for with Jesse. He had been honest with her so I didn't feel bad for her in the least and even at the end I never would have trusted her. I think because she was portrayed as pretty unlikable in the beginning I never got over that and since she really had no backstory I had no reason to change my opinion of her.

The second was at the end (going to be slightly vague here so as not to give anything away), why Tucker wasn't told at least the basic facts of Jesse and Miranda's relationship. Not necessarily to put any pressure on him or anything, but just so he wouldn't feel deliberately mislead once he discovered the truth. I get the explanation that was given, but it still seemed like her was being lied to. Since I have no experience with the mental health industry, that could have been spot on, so I can't be too judgmental there.

Overall, excellent and the characters will stick with me awhile after this read.

[Candice · Rating 4 out of 5]

First and foremost I want to say I love Alison and I want to be her bestie. I didn't think I would like her with the flipping of her hair, then she spoke and I fell in love. She's fierce, she's loyal, she's funny as all get out, she's quick, and by golly gee I NEED a friend like her.

Now, onto Jesse and Tucker. I loved how they met in the prologue and then came apart for a bit. I think we needed to see that they still thought of each other. However, Iconsider kissing cheating, so I was not happy in the beginning.

Tucker is a waiter in a restaurant in Baltimore and trying to live day by day. He has no friends, besides Alison, and is living a grey life. He has a troubled past, but is trying to overcome it. It's sick of me to have wanted to hear what happened to Tucker in detail? Yes, I understand he was put in the ICU, but was this a one time abuse or on-going, if so for how long? Why did Tucker turn to cutting? How did he know it would feel good? I guess I wanted to know more about Tucker before he went into the "nuthouse".

Jesse is a former Marine. He got injured and had to retire (or be discharged, whatever, I am not up on my military terms). Now, he does data entry. Fun fun :)

Then came Miranda and I thought it was weird how Tucker didn't want to hurt her. Was she really that close of a friend? I didn't see that, I guess I thought "if it's Miranda or Jesse, I'll take Jesse" type thing. Who is Miranda? Well, Jesse's girlfriend, of course. They've been together for 6 years, count them, SIX! But, she knows she's a beard. That's what gets me. Doesn't she think she deserves better?

Miranda, Jesse, Alison, and Tucker become close. They have dinner at each others houses, go to parties, etc. but Tucker and Jesse are just friends. They hang out and do guys nights, but one night, they relive that kiss again they had one year ago. Now, it's time for Jesse to rethink his future. Does he want a future with Miranda or Tucker? Where will he be happy? He "takes a break" from Miranda to "find himself".

Jesse is so wishy washy and it annoys me, because I can't see where he's coming from. Is he only afraid to have a relationship because of his mother?

Tucker, my sweet sweet Tucker. Totally get where you are coming from, but Alison was right about needing to tell Jesse. However, I think you were a jackass for not letting Jesse explain and ignoring him. Jesse, I think you could have tried harder. Hellooooo, ever hear of stalking?! MAKE HIM LISTEN TO YOU!!!!!!

I was shattered by the end. Completely gutted. I had to take a few hours break to compose myself.

Overall, great book! I recommend :)

[dammit, liz · Rating 2 out of 5]

For the most part, this didn't work for me. I typically really enjoy this author's books as great comfort reads, so I don't mind when they get formulaic. This was a little too much for me though. And then there's the editing stuff.. it was a bit of a mess. The first 2/3 or so of the book dragged on slowly. Of course there were the miscommunications too. And this is a little shallow, but the sex scenes are nothing in terms of hotness compared to his more recent stuff.

There were a few things I really enjoyed though. First- this author writes crazy well. If you've ever been through some really dark points in your life, this will likely get a little relatable. The emotionality and rawness of when the shit hit the fan got me attached to the characters even though didn't in the beginning of the book. I like that the story wasn't about "curing" Tucker's mental illness, it was about learning to manage with it and find happiness. And lastly, I liked the best friend, Alison. She was snarky, genuine, and loyal through everything. We'd all be better with friends like that.

[J.K. Hogan · Rating 5 out of 5]

Review Summary: A heart-wrenching, gut-busting, rollercoaster ride of a book, of which I loved every minute.

The Review

I’m kind of at a loss for words as to how to describe this book for you, but I’m going to give it a shot because, you know, it’s what I’m here for. Don’t Trust the Cut literally felt like riding a rollercoaster. You know the ones that start with the long climb to the really big hill that makes your stomach jump in your throat when you go down? Then you can kind of relax a little and have fun while you go over all the smaller hills and switchbacks. This book was kind of like that, except in the second half, there was another hill that was twice as big as the first one, only you didn’t see it coming. Even the title gives me the shivers now that I know what it means.

I can’t stress enough that you should give this book a try. That said, you’re going need some comfort afterwards. Curl up with your favorite blanket, light some candles, pet your dog, because this book tackles some Heavy issues. I don’t even really want to call it angst. It’s more like damage. If you ever read Chase in Shadow by Amy Lane—those kinds of issues. I’m pretty sure I even liked this one better, though I adore Ms. Lane.

Don’t Trust the Cut is a love story between two men who are mostly broken, and are nowhere near being ready for a relationship—even though one of them already is…sort of. Let me explain: the two main characters are Jesse, a Marine who was injured Iraq and forced into an early retirement; and Tucker, a shy guy who is returning from a “vacation” in “Canada.” Can you see the air quotes? Because I’m making them. The two guys meet at a welcome home party their mutual friends throw for them.

Jesse is actually in a relationship with a woman, Miranda, and has been for six years. Supposedly they got into it so that Miranda’s parents would get off her back, and so Jesse could hide from ‘Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell.’ I understood Jesse’s reasoning behind this relationship, but we never quite learn enough about Miranda’s background to understand why she she stuck with such an arrangement for six years. When the story picks up, Miranda begins to try and stake her claim on Jesse and get him to marry her. However, when Jesse meets Tucker, they have an instant chemistry that he can’t deny. They share a secret kiss at the party, after which Tucker freaks out for a reason unbeknownst to Jesse, and runs away.

A year later, they meet again in a chance encounter, and Jesse asks Tucker to hang out ‘as friends.’ Over time, they get closer as friends, but neither could deny their growing attraction. Yet Jesse still stubbornly stays with Miranda. The thing I did like about this dynamic, though, was that while Jesse was deep in the closet, he never lied to himself or tried to convince Tucker that he was straight. Even though he was living a lie, he still admitted to himself that he had always been gay.

When he can no longer deny having something with Tucker, Jesse breaks up with Miranda, although he allows her to continue saying they are together. It seems amicable enough, but we find out later that it’s not so much on Miranda’s part.

While I didn’t care for Miranda—and I really don’t think I was meant to—this book had wonderful characterization. I especially loved Tucker’s best friend Alison. A lot of m/m romances have the token straight female roommate/bestie, who rarely adds to the story and leans toward the stereotypical. But Alison was too fricking hilarious to ignore.

“And why do we have to keep feeding you, Marmaduke? It’s expensive, taking care of such a big dog.” [Alison talking about Jesse]

Jesse and Tucker both struggle with the relationship for different reasons. Jesse isn’t ready to come out because he worries about his mother’s opinion—she basically says she’d rather him be a cheating bastard than gay—and the opinions of his friends from the Marines. He feels that he had to step in as the head of the family when his father left, and that he had a duty to get married and have a family. He still feels the need to do these things, but he wants to do right by Tucker.

Tucker has his own very serious issues that shaped the person he is at the start of the story. He’s too terrified and ashamed to tell Jesse, and that insecurity is part of what is wrong in the first place. Jesse finds out by accident and, let’s just say all hell breaks loose. Jesse can’t help but be angry that Tucker withheld the truth, especially after Jesse was forced to come out to his mother and his friends. Tucker and Jesse separate for a time, each trying to do what’s best for the other one and both missing the mark. Mainly, Tucker is his own worst enemy. All I’ll say is that he has a mental illness. If you want to know more about what is actually wrong with Tucker, click on the spoiler cut.


Tucker is a self-mutilator and diagnosed bipolar. He was hospitalized twice for cutting and attempted suicide. He was also in an abusive relationship. We don’t learn much at all about Tucker’s past other than that, because the story focuses on the dynamic between him and Jesse. However, Tucker alludes to the fact that the abusive relationship came after the cutting, as he felt that his scars made him disgusting, and that in turn made his boyfriend beat him.

We are never really given any specific incident that caused cutting, other than the bipolar disorder in general. While I am not bipolar, I do have other issues that made Tucker’s problems really resonate with me. He’s falling in love with Jesse but his feelings of inadequacy are not about Jesse, or anyone else but Tucker.

Something finally happens to push Tucker over the edge (I’m not even going to tell you about it in the spoiler), and he cuts too much. He ends up in the hospital again. It took him weeks of surgery and therapy to recover. During which Jesse is allowed to see him but not talk about anything that happened between them.

I don’t know how—and I don’t really wanna—but Mr. Boehme does a stellar job getting into the head of a clinically depressed person. I know, been there, done that. You just really have to read it to see, if you can handle it!

I was glad that Jesse and Tucker did not just jump back in their relationship after all of the misunderstandings were cleared up. They had a lot of work to do together to get them both right with themselves.

I have to say, I love Kade Boehme’s voice in this book. As I said before, this is the first one of his I’ve read, so I can’t speak to consistency, but I will definitely be coming back for more. His prose is almost poetic, but not in such a way that pulls you out of the narrative. I think I have more notes and highlights in this book than any other one I’ve read since I’ve been using an eReader. There were just so many quotes that I wanted to save. And good lord the love scenes were hot, but romantic as well. Each one advanced the plot, which is a mark of a good romance. There was every element I love in a good sex scene—not that I’m going to tell you what those are. It was perfect to balance all of the heavy stuff the characters had to deal with.

Admittedly, I thought the beginning of this book started off a little slow at the beginning, until I began to understand that that was the nature of Tucker and Jesse’s relationship. But it built up steam and just kept on pounding, until finally the reader gets her reward for going through all the pain along with these men. The HEA was amazing and perfect, and it was beyond worth it. This is one that will stick with me for a long, long time.

[Meggie · Rating 2 out of 5]

I really dislike stories with "Jumping to wrong conclusion without talking about it" plots. And this story is one of them. Sure I liked how it started and developed, but the last dramatic twist at the end, truly, wasn't needed. Tucker past could have been written differently, the way it was presented in this story, seriously didn't feel right. I won't say much about their HEA, because it wasn't real. With such a dramatic bang, everything between Jesse and Tucker, resolved to fast and to soon. Like BANG, now we are together and happy again.
Yea right!

[Kate McMurray · Rating 4 out of 5]

This was my experience reading this book: last night, I made myself put the book down (with great reluctance!) at the 60% mark because it was already pushing 1am and I had to go to work this morning. But then I woke up early and finished it because I had to know how things turned out. Totally worth it for the ending! (Uh, there's something in my eyes, guys, give me a sec.)

So basically, while I had a few quibbles, I liked all of these characters a lot and found the book really engaging.

[Arthur]

I'm afraid that the author will lecture me if I criticize the book, so it's safer not to buy his books for now. We'll see.

[LiveYourLife BuyTheBook · Rating 4 out of 5]

4 Stars

A "Live Your Life, Buy The Book" Review

The first few pages of this book throw you right into the story. At first I felt like it was all too much to fast and wondered if it was going to be one of those stories. A few chapters in I realized it was far more than your instant attraction closet story.

Tucker is trying to put his life back together. Putting his past behind him proves to be more difficult than the people around him think it should be. It’s best for him to keep it simple and take things day by day. He has his best friend Alison, who would do anything for him, except BS him about what she thinks. Tucker is also haunted by the memory of a kiss at a party a year before. He’s never felt anything that amazing. Too bad it was with a hot closet case with Barbie as a girlfriend.

Jesse knows he hasn’t seemed like himself since he got out of the military. The repeal of DADT basically squashed the reason for him running away and joining in the first place. Jesse has known since he was a teenager he was attracted to men. His relationship his girlfriend, Miranda, was initially an understanding she was his beard. Over the years the lines got blurred as Miranda and his family pushed for more. Jesse knows he allowed it to happen but his need to keep those around him happy costs him his. When he sees the gorgeous dark and curly haired Tucker at a party one night the sparks are just too much to ignore. A heated kiss in the bathroom awakens the part of him he’s kept hidden for years. But the guy runs out on him and nobody will tell Jesse how to get ahold of him. Seems they’re pretty protective of the guy for some reason which they also won’t tell him.

A year later they run into each other and all those old feelings come back for both of them. Both try to fight it because Tucker isn’t exactly stable on his own and Jesse is still with Miranda. They realize quickly that’s not going to happen but with their secrets and things stacked against them,they both think it’s doomed from the start.

So I really liked this book. Like I said, I wasn’t loving it the first couple of chapters because it seemed pretty high on drama, but as the book progressed the reasons for it became apparent. There is a good amount of angst but just the right amount for me. It includes serious subject matter in physical abuse, not on page, and suicide attempts and cutting but it’s well balanced and not too heavy considering. Tucker’s character was very likable and a fun mess of a man. I highly enjoyed the banter in this story. Particularly between Tucker and his best friend Alison, whom I LOVED! She cracked me up over and over.

Tucker and Jesse had good chemistry. Jesse had a lot of stuff to deal with in this book but the one constant was that he finally found someone to accept him for himself. Hell,he liked the real Jesse. Jesse had spent so much time in hiding and faking who he thought he should be he lost himself. You could feel the connection between the MCs. You could practically feel their impulse to smile and touch each other. It was all very sweet without being too much. The sex was meaningful and hot. I thought the way Jesse slowly dealt with his coming out was pretty realistic. He didn’t want to hurt Tucker, but he was scared of the fall out.

Something I didn’t like about this book was Miranda. Yes she played her bitch role well but the back and forth about her being a nice person and a nasty one just didn’t work for me. I’d wonder why the hell she would want to be friends with guy who attracted her ex’s attention enough to make hm break it off. I’d be suspicious of that but they all just thought she’s nice and just wants to be friends. Maybe I’m just too cynical but I just didn’t see that happening. It worked enough but it did bother me. I guess in the end they had to remain friends somehow so we didn’t think Jesse was a total jerk. She was to blame for most of her heartache but you can’t help but feel sorry for the dumped. Well, I felt a tiny bit bad for her. Just a tad. ;)

I’d recommend this book. Don’t give up on it based on the first few chapters. It all makes sense the more you read. It’s not the writing, it’s the content, that some people might not like. Despite some heavy subject matter this book was very funny. I highlighted lots of lines that made me smile or laugh. It was sexy, sweet and made the think. Good book!