Ούτε το όνομά μου

by Thea Halo, Μαρίνα Φράγκου (Translator)

Γενοκτονία και επιβίωση: Μια αληθινή ιστορία του Πόντου

"Η οικογένειά μας ήταν: η μητέρα μου, ο πατέρας μου, οι πέντε αδελφές και τα τέσσερα αδέλφια μου, ένας θείος, μια θεία Αρμένισσα -μάλλον και αυτή κουβαλούσε τη δική της ιστορία- και η κόρη τους που παντρεύτηκε και μετακόμισε μακριά πολύ μικρή. Μετά από εμάς τίποτα.
Ζούσαμε στην Νέα Υόρκη, στην Ουέστ Εκατοστή Δεύτερη Οδό, αλλά τότε ήταν πολύ διαφορετικά από ό,τι είναι σήμερα. Στη δεκαετία του '40 και του '50, ο δρόμος έμοιαζε με σκηνικό από το Ουέστ Σάιντ Στόρι. Εμείς ζούσαμε σε ένα διαμέρισμα πέντε δωματίων που ήταν χτισμένα σαν τα βαγόνια ενός τρένου - κάθε δωμάτιο επικοινωνούσε με το επόμενο.
Μεγαλώσαμε ανάμεσα σε Ιρλανδούς κυρίως, αν και υπήρχαν και άλλες φυλές και εθνικότητες στις γύρω γειτονιές και στα σχολεία μας. Η καταγωγή μας, όμως, ήταν ένα μυστήριο για εμάς τα παιδιά. Είχαμε έρθει από δύο χαμένους πολιτισμούς. Και οι δύο γονείς μου ήταν από την Τουρκία και οι λαοί τους είχαν ζήσει εκεί για χιλιάδες χρόνια, αλλά δεν ήταν Τούρκοι. Κανένας δε γνώριζε, ούτε καν είχε ακούσει για το λαό της μητέρας μου -τους Έλληνες Πόντιους της Μικράς Ασίας. Όσο για το λαό του πατέρα μου, τους Ασσύριους, γι' αυτούς πίστευαν ότι είχαν ζήσει μόνο στους αρχαίους χρόνους και δεν υπήρχαν πια. Ως παιδί, δεν ανέφερα ποτέ την καταγωγή της μητέρας μου, ενώ τις λίγες φορές που επιχείρησα να απαντήσω στις ερωτήσεις για την καταγωγή του πατέρα μου, με διόρθωναν με μεγάλη επισημότητα.
«Όχι, γλυκιά μου. Εννοείς ότι είσαι Σύρια. Οι Ασσύριοι είναι αρχαίος λαός. Δεν υπάρχουν πια». Ακόμα και οι δάσκαλοί μου αυτό μου έλεγαν".

Η Thea Halo αφηγείται την αλησμόνητη ιστορία της μητέρας της, Σάνο. Στην ηλικία των 10 μόλις ετών η Σάνο επιβίωσε από την πορεία θανάτου που αφάνισε την οικογένειά της. Εβδομήντα χρόνια μετά τον εκπατρισμό της η Σάνο και η κόρη της Thea επιστρέφουν στην Τουρκία σε μια προσπάθεια αναζήτησης του χωριού και του πατρικού της. Στο βιβλίο, η Σάνο, μια ελληνίδα Πόντια που γεννήθηκε σε ένα μικρό χωριό κοντά στη Μαύρη Θάλασσα, αναπολεί την παραδοσιακή αγροτική ζωή της στα βουνά του Πόντου.

Πόντος 1919. Η φοβερή συνειδητοποίηση ότι κάτι δεν πήγαινε καλά έφτασε σιγά -σιγά στο χωριό της Σάνο. Άγνωστοι άρχισαν να περιφέρονται και να διανυκτερεύουν στα χωράφια και στα δάση της περιοχής. Παραμόνευαν από απόσταση σαν αρπακτικά. Τούρκοι στρατιώτες έκαναν επιδρομές και οδηγούσαν τους άντρες στα άθλια στρατόπεδα εργασίας. Οι περισσότεροι πέθαιναν από τις κακουχίες και την πείνα. Αργότερα, την άνοιξη του 1920, οι Τούρκοι στρατιώτες ξαναγύρισαν και διέταξαν τους κατοίκους να υπακούσουν τις εντολές του Στρατηγού Κεμάλ Ατατούρκ: «Πρέπει να φύγετε απ' αυτόν τον τόπο. Μαζί σας θα πάρετε ό,τι μπορείτε να σηκώσετε...». Στις πορείες θανάτου που ακολούθησαν, τα θύματα πέθαιναν εκεί όπου έπεφταν, με τα αρπακτικά να παραμονεύουν. Έτσι έφτασε στο τέλος της η τρισχιλιόχρονη ιστορία του ποντιακού ελληνισμού στην Τουρκία. Έχοντας χάσει ό,τι αγαπούσε στη ζωή της, ακόμη και το όνομά της, η Σάνο δόθηκε με προξενιό σ' έναν άντρα που την πήρε μαζί του στην Αμερική στην ηλικία των 15 ετών. Ο άντρας της είχε τα τριπλάσια χρόνια της. Η αφήγηση παρακολουθεί την πορεία του γάμου της, την ανατροφή των 10 παιδιών της και τη μεταμόρφωσή της από μια αθώα παιδούλα, που ζούσε μια παραδοσιακή ζωή σε έναν απομακρυσμένο τόπο, σε μια στοργική μητέρα και αποφασιστική γυναίκα στη Νέα Υόρκη του 20ού αιώνα.

Η Τουρκία αποσιωπά συνειδητά τις σφαγές σχεδόν 3.000.000 ανθρώπων που ανήκαν στις χριστιανικές μειονότητες των Ελλήνων, Αρμενίων και Ασσυρίων, καθώς και τους μαζικούς εκτοπισμούς εκατομμυρίων άλλων. Το βιβλίο αυτό είναι μια σπάνια προσωπική μαρτυρία των τρομερών συμβάντων εκείνης της γενοκτονίας. Η αφήγηση αποτελεί μια αυθεντική κατάθεση ψυχής, γραμμένη αριστουργηματικά, ενώ η πλοκή εξελίσσεται μέσα από τις προσωπικές αναμνήσεις και τις αγωνίες ενός δράματος.

Genres: Nonfiction, History, Memoir, Biography, Greece, Historical, War

491 pages, Paperback

First published May 1, 2000

About the author

Thea Halo (born 1941) is an American writer and painter of Assyrian and Greek heritage. Born in New York City she is the 8th child of Abraham and Sano Halo. Thea began writing poetry and short-stories in 1992 and in 2000 she published her book Not Even My Name the memoir of her mother who belonged in Turkey's Greek minority.

Reviews

[Cheryl · Rating 4 out of 5]

If only one could make time stand still; if one could erase all the horror and inhumanity in the world.-Thea Halo

Every year in December (for the past three years), I've tried to do two things: read a conscious work of narrative nonfiction and a D.H. Lawrence novel. Since I usually end the year with Lawrence and my blind commitment to his shenanigans, I decided to tackle this nonfiction read first. This is my eighteenth nonfiction read of the year and the fifth book I've read that encapsulates the estrangement an exile feels:

I never stopped thinking of our home and land and the way we lived there. I pictured every detail in my mind over and over all these years so I wouldn't forget; so I could keep them alive in my heart. I can close my eyes now and see our beautiful landscape.

If you've never heard of the Pontic Greeks, this is because they were erased from their homes in Turkey, their villages were destroyed, along with their ancient Greek language. The same happened to the Assyrians and Armenians. The Greek names for towns and villages were changed after World War I, during the era of Mustafa Kemal. Constantinople, once known as Byzantium, became what we now know to be Istanbul. "1.5 million Armenians were slaughtered, 750,000 Assyrians, and 353,000 Pontic Greeks, and the cruel death marches to exile of 1.5 million more Greeks of Turkey…between 1915-1923." I first read of this exile death march while reading Mark Mustian's novel The Gendarme years ago, but there's no better distilling moment than that of an actual survivor's account.

It was a strange dichotomy knowing of Turkey's atrocious history, and its intermittent rampages against the Kurds, and then visiting the land and finding a warm, receptive people. Where did that barbarism come from? How was it born? All the typical answers came to me of greed, territory and conquest, of fear and jealousy, but they were just words. As usual, it was difficult to reconcile the incredible brutality of c country's history with the seeming gentleness one finds in its people.

Thea Halo's story is intertwined with her mother's, Themía, later known as Sano; although Thea calls her mother sweetheart, which is something unique but endearing to come across in the dialogue. To figure out her family's past, Thea asks her mother Themía about their family's forced death march out of Turkey, when Themía loses everything, even her name, as she watches the cruel disintegration of her family. Themía is later forced to live with and work for strangers. She is married before she is even a teenager, to a man about thirty years her senior, and she later has ten children. Yet it isn't until she is an old woman in her eighties, when she is finally able to return to her childhood home with her daughter, Thea. As you can imagine, much is changed at this time.

This is a true story that is as much enlightening as it is harrowing. I have the first edition of this hardcover and in my used copy, a little boy lays on a black Labrador as he reads something on either a cellphone or some kind of gadget. The dog sleeps comfortably. I don't think I can get rid of the picture actually, because for all I know, the boy could be a part of this story and gauging from his features and the furniture in the background, he could be Thea Halo's kin. Okay so this is me in dream state speaking, but you get the gist, for this little memento from someone else's past reminds me of the interconnectedness that comes with physical books, and it also underscores the importance of this form of nonfictional account. Imagine what happens if survivors of brutality simply remained silent, and everyone else chooses to be ignorant of historical trends...

[Chrissie · Rating 5 out of 5]

NO SPOILERS!!!

This book gets 5 stars. I don't care if at points the text seemed a little simplistic. I don't care at all. I don't give a hoot. The message is beautiful. What it teaches is beautiful, and I LOVE Sano the mother of the author. It is her that has done the teaching. This book is not just a book about Turkish ethnic cleansing. Yes, you get that too, but the prime message is how one should live a life. If you do not read this bok, you will never know about Sano. She is one of those individuals that don't make history books but have so much to impart to others. I give this book 5 stars b/c it introduced me to Sano. Pure and simple, that is why. She is has such wisdom, such generosity and such unconditional love.

I have complained about some of the lines. Other lines I adore:

(page 324): "Life is our reward. The rest is up to us."

(page 311:): "The only other hotel in Aybasti we were told, was even more primitive than the one we were in, but we were grateful there was a hotel, and we had slept as well as we would have in a luxury suite. As my mother said, 'When your eyes are closed all rooms are the same.'"

(page 268): "'How dare this woman tell my eight-year-old son he's too stupid to be a monitor? There is no such thing as a stupid child. They're only stupid teachers who don't know how to teach. Children are never stupid,' I said. 'And my son is not stupid. How dare you destroy his confidence?' And with that I broke down and cried......"

(page 262): But because of the Depression, none of these jobs lasted.He even worked driving a trolley car for a while, but the hours were so long and the job so monotonous, that he fell asleep at the wheel and almost ran someone over, so he quit."

I like the straightforward tone.

This book is presented as if the mother is sitting in front of you telling you her story. YES, the book is often telling rather than showing - but I don't care. It works. You learn not only about the ethnic cleansing of Assyrians, Armenians and Pontic Greeks, but also about their traditions and culture. You learn about Sano's life. Her life was hard, not ONLY due to ethnic cleansing! But boy did she come out singing! :0)

Oh, one more thing, other reviewers say they aren't interested in Sano's life in the US. You need this. You need to see her whole life. This is how you SEE she surmounted her difficulties.

No, there is one MORE things. This author learned more about her identity and her heritage than the author of Passage To Ararat. Or maybe it is just that women and men see and express things a bit differently. Come on, that is true!

Through page 233: The prose is very uneven. Very different in different sections. This is rather jostling, sometimes quite disturbing. Some parts are so terribly simplistic. Perhaps this is done on purpose to remind us that Sano is only 10. Well, now whe is 15. Here is another example from page 233:

"Our first stop was Istanbul, but we only saw it from the port until the cargo was loaded. Then we were on our way again. On board I saw two young women crocheting little baskets with colored thread. I watched them from a short distance too shy to ask them how it was done."

""I bet I could do that, I thought. It's the thing that has carried me through life, this feeling that I could do what I set out to do. I can tell just by looking at something if I could master it or not, and once that I determine that I can, there is no stopping me. A little gift from God perhaps, this resolve of my will."

You know this is a child relating the narrative. Now if this is a child's book, will they be able to read the complicated dense history chapters? There is alot of educative material included- how houses are built, how bread is baked, holiday traditions, etc. You do learn much about life in Kurdish, Armenian and Pontic Greek communities.

Through page 180: Here follows a quote from pages 179-180:

"The evening sun streamed through the window and caught hold of the handle of the tub and turned it orange, then spilled down onto the clay floor at my feet. The light of the fire danced on the wall. Was it so long ago that I stood naked on a stool by the fire in front of my mother as she lathered a soft cloth and rubbed my body until I foamed in every crevice?"

and from page 169:

"I tried to cry, but I couldn't. Even when he wrapped his arms around me and I felt him sobbing, I still did not cry. I could only stand like a tiny post for him to cry on."

The person speaking in both quotes is a ten year old child. There is no saying who is stronger, a child or an adult. I must point out that the text is very different in the historical chapters. It is dense, filled with dates and names and treaties.


Through page 177: The book is riveting. The different narrative tones make sense now. Please see message two below, where I explain! Emotionally, this is a very tough read. Sano's experiences of the death march rip you apart and not just b/c of reasons for the death march by the leaders of Turkey, but b/c of the behavior one individual directs towards another. This has nothing to do with politics. This is how low a human being can be, how badly they can behave. I will simply say that one woman even ripped the name from the author's mother. Originally she was named Themia. She was renamed Sano by a Kudish woman. Who she was as an idividual was totally negated. Everything was taken from her - everything! The names were confusing me, now I understand. You see childish innoncence washed away.

Through page 68: This book is a memoir about the ethnic cleansing that took place in Turkey after the First World War. I have read and reviewed Passage to Ararat, A Summer Without Dawn: An Armenian Epic, The Road From Home: A True Story of Courage, Survival and Hope and Skylark Farm. All of these concerned the Armenian Genocide. Each had a different angle. None of them have been perfect but having read all of them I now have a better understanding of what happened. I still need to read Armenian Golgotha. I have a hunch this one will be the best...... I wish I had started with it, but I shouldn't say until I have read it. I ordered it today! However it is important to note that in Turkey, particularly after WW1, the ethnic cleansing that occurred not only attempted to rid the country of Armenians but also Pontic Greeks and Assyrians. Greek Nationals were also moved out of Turkey. At this time, 1.5 million Armenians, 750 thousand Assyrians and 353 thousand Pontic Greeks were slaughtered. This book, Not Even My Name: A True Story, is about the author's mother, a Pontic Greek, who survived. This gives yet another perspective to what I have read previously. The author's mother was 10 when she lived through these horrors. The author returns to the Pontic Mountains with her mother to find again the small village where her mother grew up. Her mother had never really talked about her life experiences, but finally all unfolds when she returns to the village, at the age of 79 accompanied by her daughter. Her story is this book.

It is very clear that the mother does not live with hate. How is that possible? The mother has a simple answer. Where she lived, in the three Greek villages in the Pontic Mountains of Turkey bordering the Black Sea, the Turks, living in the Turkish villages, were their friends! This is why she did not hate "the Turks". She blames the killings on Mustafa Kemal, Attatürk. There is where the blame belongs, him and of course those who helped him. The author has such a hard time reconciling the barbarism of the past with the kindness of the Turkish people they meet when the go back to the village in 1989. Sano, who survived, is a cheerful woman. When whe immigrated to the US and raised her family of 10 children, she had her memories but she kept them to herself. Locked up in side, hidden. She was happy. The author has such wonderful memories of her mother, busy, busy, busy, who wouldn't be with 10 kids, but she is so happy, and she always sings! This happiness shines through all the pages I have read. I very much appreciate this "way of looking at life", not letting yourself be dragged down in the mud. Reading a book about such horrible events is almost impossible if the book is written in a negative manner.

One cannot but notice the wonderful relationship between the author, Thea, and her mother, Sano. I will be very honest here. It actually makes me feel guilty. They NEVER argue. They look at each other and they understand. I feel a bit like a terrible person when I read about how good and considerate they are to each other..... It makes me feel quite irritated with myself. It is just that when I don't agree about something I never manage to keep my mouth shut...... But is it good to not open your mouth and pretend you agree? That builds a relationship on false grounds. So far they just always seem to agree, and this sort of makes me jealous. There, I said what I am thinking.

History of the Pontic Greeks is succinctly summarized. I appreciate this tremendously. The history goes back to the ancient times, Homer's epic poems of the Bronze Age. Why? Well, to explain how and when the Pontic Greeks settled in Turkey(Asia Minor / Ionia). Not only do we learn of the savage killings under Attatürk's rule, but also about the huge efforts he made to nationalize and modernize Turkey. Attatürk literally means "father of the Turks". He renamed Constantinople to Istanbul. To improve literacy, important education reforms were instigated . Muslim women were banned from wearing the black veils that had covered their faces. Monogamous marriages replaced the earlier acceptance of multiple wives. Roman letters replaced Arabic script. He tried to bring Turkey up to the standards of Western life. I like that the good and the bad are stated.

This could perhaps be a YA book. When the book shifts to the mother's story, her experiences as a child, that is when you feel that it is aimed toward a younger group of readers. There is a map and information concerning how names are pronounced. I find that I am recognizing cultural similarities with the Greek traditions depicted in Eleni. Eleni is a wonderful book that I will never forget. Eleni's author, Nicholas Gage, and Peter Balakian, the translator of Armenian Golgotha mentioned above, have both praised this book. I still have many pages left, so that is all for now.

[Katerina Efstathiou · Rating 3 out of 5]

Αγαπητοί φίλοι συναναγνώστες,

Πρόκειται για την καταγραφή της μαρτυρίας της μητέρας της συγγραφέως. Νόμιζα, πως αυτό το βιβλίο θα ήταν συγκλονιστικό. Τουλάχιστον, όχι για μένα. Παρ' όλες τις περιγραφές, τη λιτότητα με την οποία περιγράφηκε η βία και η φρίκη του ξεριζωμού στα μάτια και στη συνείδηση ενός 9 χρονου παιδιού, δεν συγκλονίστηκα ως όφειλε. Κατ' εμέ η Σέρρα του Καλπούζου , στην οποία θα πάω ευθύς μετά να αλλάξω βαθμολογία και να της βάλω 4 * άξιζε και με άγγιξε περισσότερο καθότι άφατα πιο λυρική και με περισσότερη λογοτεχνική - φανταστική ματιά. Συμπονώ τη μητέρα της συγγραφέως και καλά έκανε και έβγαλε προς τα έξω την μαρτυρία ενός θύματος αλλά τι να πώ..Ίσως έχω γίνει πολύ περίεργη με αυτά που διαβάζω.

Όπως προαναφέρθηκε λοιπόν, το βιβλίο διακρίνεται απο δωρικότητα στις περιγραφές των φρικιαστικών σκηνών θανάτων στο δρόμο. Σε συνταράσσει κάπως το γεγονός πως απο τα 6 παιδιά της οικογένειας επιβιώσαν μόνο 2. Βέβαια, ενώ το βιβλίο ξεκίνησε με τους καλύτερους των οιωνών κρίνω πως το 4ο και τελευταίο μέρος του ήταν τόσο αχρείαστο όσο ένα τζάκι τον κατακαλόκαιρο.Μπορεί να δικαιολογούσα ίσως καμιά σελίδα που να εξηγεί πως (δεν) βρήκαν το χωριό της Σάνο αλλά ως εκεί. Εκείνο που εκτίμησα όμως , βαθύτατα είναι το ιστορικό πλαίσιο των περίπου 30 σελίδων και το θάρρος της συγγραφέως να διαμορφώνει την παγκόσμια κοινή γνώμη κατά της Τουρκίας, κατά της Γαλλίας που δεν στάθηκε στο πλευρό της Ελλάδας και ακόμη περισσότερο κατά της Αμερικής που πληρώθηκε αδρά για να αποσιωποιεί στα μεγάλα πανεπιστήμια την φοβερή συμμετοχή των Τούρκων σε όλη αυτή τη θηριωδία.

Αν έχετε κάποιο άλλο βιβλίο με παρόμοιο θέμα να προτείνετε, να ξέρετε σας εκτιμώ διπλά !

[Megan · Rating 5 out of 5]

Sano Halo survived the Turkish genocide committed against The Pontic Greeks, Armenians, and Assyrians in the early 20th century. It was not until Sano's daughter, Thea, wrote her mother's story after traveling back to Turkey that the fragments of memory were pieced together to create a tragic and beautiful tapestry. I read this book in eight hours, and lost myself in the vivid and often heartbreaking imagery that accompanied the narrative. As the great-granddaughter of Greek immigrants, I found that this story sparked an added curiosity about who and where I came from. My Greek culture has indeed defined much of who I am, and it is infathomable to speculate who I might be without it. Tragically for Sano, much of her culture was all but lost until she reached old age. One of my favorite parts of the book said it most eloquently from Thea's perspective regarding the revelation of a forgotten, or at best, shrouded past:

"I had a people. I had love that went beyond the present. That went beyond my own lifetime and my own small life. A love that was somehow ancient. That was connected to the beginning of time."

[Λίνα Θωμάρεη · Rating 5 out of 5]

Ένας από τους λόγους που ξεκίνησα να διαβάζω λογοτεχνία !!!!
Υπερ-αγαπημένο!!!!

[Tiki · Rating 5 out of 5]

This story is why many in Greece still say "o monos kalos Turkos einai nekros Turkos" or the only good Turk is a dead Turk. This genocide against the Greek, Armenian and Assyrian populations was heartbreaking - maybe more so in Turkey's shameful denial of these events to this day. Just ask writer Orhan Pamuk who was jailed over speaking the truth. Sano's story is one of survival; many weren't that lucky, but it came at a great price which was to lose all her family. This is a beautifully written and haunting story of just one of the many tragic episodes of 20th century genocide.

[Paige · Rating 2 out of 5]

I read this book because it had been sitting on my to-read list for years and I'm really trying to downsize it so that I can make actual use of it. I kind of wish I had "downsized" this book.

By all outward measures I should have liked it. It's history and memoir. It deals with the little-known genocide & exiles conducted against Christian (in this case Pontic Greek but also Assyrian) minorities in Turkey. A review from the Washington Post Book World says, "It is impossible to read the story of this woman's life without marveling at the strength of her spirit." It gets starred reviews from Booklist and Publishers Weekly. And really high reviews here on Goodreads. But I still found it lacking.

Even people who love the book note that the writing is not anything special. The book is written in Thea Halo's first person as well as by Thea talking in first person pretending she is her mother, Sano. So that part is kind of awkward and the writing is almost completely lackluster. I'm willing to overlook that in a lot of cases, especially cases similar to this one where the power of the story outweighs lack of skillful writing. So where the book fell flat for me, I guess, can be summed up by two words: rape apologism. Sano is married off at age 15 (or maybe 14; in either case she won't start menstruating for another 2 years) to a 45 year old stranger who promptly rapes her. And physically abuses her on numerous occasions that she mentions in the book. He also verbally abuses her on several occasions that she mentions. He hits and whips their children. She relates a time that he won't "let" her go to the movies with her (female) friend. He abandons her, 40 & pregnant, for months, after giving her the cold shoulder, because he mistakenly thought she had sex with a doctor who examined her. And he didn't tell her about it until 20 years later. Yet all sorts of excuses are made for his behavior. "Oh he felt his growing children slipping away." "I just didn't know how embarrassed he was by my affection." "Oh but he made this garden with his bare hands." "He was so smart, he was better at chemistry than his chemistry teacher." It's gross. And of course I realize that this is the reality that a lot of women had/have. Covering for abusers is par for the course. But this is not treated at all in the book. The words abuse and rape aren't mentioned at all (well, there is a passing mention of Turks raping Greeks, but I guess if a total stranger buys you from the family you live with and forces himself on you it's A-OK as far as Thea Halo is concerned!). Instead, Thea says, "Don't you realize Dad loved you?? Don't you?? HE LOVED YOU, MOM. WELL?" Lady, your mom just confided in you you about how she was raped and abused by this guy and your response is to try and force her into saying that he loved her? Gross.

So Sano's spirit may be strong, but this story is not triumphant or redemptive. Even the "happy ending" is really fucking depressing. It is about one perseverant, displaced, downtrodden woman who went through a whole lot of nasty and really really loves her kids. She seems pretty rad. I'm sorry it was Thea who told her story.

5 stars for Sano, 1 or 2 stars for Thea's writing but 0 for her misogyny, 4 stars for the book's first 200 pages, and maybe 1 or 2 stars for the last 125.

[Superstella · Rating 4 out of 5]

I'm about halfway through this book and don't know if I can continue. The scene that opens one of the chapters got to me so badly that I had to make myself walk away for a while. I simply cannot fathom how one can endure such atrocities and then be expected to continue any sort of normal life. How does one put such things out of one's mind?

I hope to be able to pick it back up and continue at some point, but I need to read something lighter in the interim.

[Wendy · Rating 5 out of 5]

Note to self: this would be a fantastic book club book!! The true story of a young girl who survived the genocides in turkey in the 1920's. It is written by her daughter who did a fantastic job of including the history along with the moving story of the mothers difficult life. The memories that are related about the love of the grandmother to the mother are so sweet and encouraging.

[Sandy · Rating 5 out of 5]

One of the best books I have ever EVER read. It reads like fiction, it isn't, and you can't believe this really happened. How could this happen? When I am asked what my favorite book is, I tell them Not Even My Name.

[Crazytourists_books · Rating 3 out of 5]

Η ιστορία είναι συγκλονιστική. Το βιβλίο όμως δεν είναι τόσο καλό. Ο τρόπος γραφής είναι παλιός, αυτή η συνεχής χρήση μεταφορών για όλα εκνευρίζει, κουράζει αλλά κυρίως εμποδίζει τον αναγνώστη να συνδεθεί με την ιστορία, να συνειδητοποιήσει το μέγεθος του πόνου των ανθρώπων αυτών. Ήθελα δωρική, αυστηρή σχεδόν αφήγηση, να κόβει σα μαχαίρι...

[Hariklia Heristanidis · Rating 5 out of 5]

I don't think I can add much to the many excellent reviews already here at Goodreads; the blurb too, describes the book well; but what I can contribute is a very personal response.
I chose to read "Not Even My Name" because like Sano, the main "character", my grandparents fled Asia Minor to escape slaughter by the Turks. Where she went to America, my grandparents (from both my mother and father's sides) went to Greece. In the very next generation, my parents fled poverty and political oppression, and fled to Australia. Three successive generations have been born on different continents.
I turned 50 a few years ago and perhaps because of this, I began to take an interest in my family's past. I have discovered that genealogical research is somewhat difficult when your ancestors are displaced people! So I have begun reading books about the Greek, Assyrian and Armenian genocide to get a feel for the times that my grandparents lived through.
Unlike Thea Halo, the author, my parents did not have access to my grandparents' first-hand accounts of the "Asia Minor Catastrophe", my father was orphaned at the age of 3 or 4, and my mother lost her father when she was 10 or so. Her mother was a remote figure, working away from home from Monday to Saturday to support 6 children. By the time Mum might have thought to question Yiayia about her life, she was living on the other side of the world.
Although I don't think any of my grandparents went on a death march, I am grateful to Thea Halo for documenting her mother's amazing story, and giving me an insight into that time.
I particularly liked the way the book was structured, and the ratio of historical detail to "story". It's an excellent (though often heartbreaking) read.
I'm also grateful that the story of the genocide of "my" people is being told, despite fervent denial - to this day, by the Turkish government.

[Searchingthemeaningoflife Greece · Rating 5 out of 5]

[Περίπου την ίδια εποχή που γράφτηκαν τα ομηρικά έπη αναδύθηκε και ο θεσμός της πόλης-κράτους 750-700 π.Χ.) με πρότυπο αυτές που είχαν δημιουργηθεί στη Μεσοποταμία περί το 3500 π.Χ. και ξανάρχισε ο αποικισμός. Στην Ιωνία, οι άποικοι εγκαταστάθηκαν βόρεια και ανατολικά κατά μήκος της Οροσειράς του Πόντου και των νότιων ακτών της Μαύρης Θάλασσας. Η Σινώπη ήταν η πρώτη ιωνική πόλη που ιδρύθηκε από αποίκους της Μιλήτου το 785 π.Χ. Μετά τη Σινώπη ιδρύθηκαν και άλλες πόλεις όπως η Σαμσούντα και τα Κοτύωρα (σημερινή Ορντού), ενώ το 756 π.Χ. ιδρύθηκε η περίφημη πόλη της Τραπεζούντας. Η λέξη «πόντος» είναι (αρχαιοελληνική λέξη που σημαίνει «θάλασσα» και «πόντιος» είναι «ο άνθρωπος της θάλασσας» . Από αυτές τις αρχαίες ελληνικές λέξεις πήρε το όνομά της και η οροσειρά αλλά και οι άνθρωποι που την κατοικούσαν, οι Πόντιοι. Εδώ ήταν το μέρος όπου ο Ξενοφώντας και οι «μύριοι» βρήκαν καταφύγιο μετά την υποχώρησή τους από τη Μεσοποταμία το 400 π.Χ. Ο μύθος του Ιάσωνα και των Αργοναυτών για την αναζήτηση του χρυσόμαλλου δέρατος σχετίζεται με τους Πόντιους, όπως και ο μύθος του Ηρακλή που καταφέρνει να πάρει τη ζώνη της Αμαζόνας Ιππολύτης. Ο φιλόσοφος Διογένης (περίπου 412-323 π.Χ.), που λέγεται, ότι γυρνούσε με ένα φανάρι σε αναζήτηση ενός καλού ανθρώπου, καθώς και ο μεγάλος ιστορικός και γεωγράφος Στράβων (περίπου 63 π.Χ.- 23 μ.Χ ) ήταν αμφότεροι Πόντιοι. ]

[Αυτό έψαχνα όλη μου τη ζωή; Την κληρονομιά μου; Ποια ήμουν και τι ήμουν; Γι' αυτό είχα αυτή τη μανία με τα ταξίδια από τόσο νεαρή ηλικία; Κανένας τουριστικός οδηγός δε θα μπορούσε να παίξει αυτό τον ρόλο. Ένιωθα αλλαγμένη κατά έναν ανεξηγητο τρόπο. Είχα ιστορία. Είχα λαό δικό μου. Είχα αγάπη που ξεπερνούσε τα όρια του πορόντος. Αγάπη που ξεπερνούσε τη διάρκεια της δικής μου ζωής και τη βραχύτητά της. Μια αγάπη που ήταν κατά κάποιο τρόπο αρχαία και συνδεόταν με απαρχές του χρόνου. ]

[aizjanika · Rating 4 out of 5]

By focusing mostly on the story of one Pontic Greek woman who was exiled from her home in Asian Minor (Turkey) at the age of 10, this book also tells the story of all the Pontic Greeks, Assyrians, and Armenians who were also slaughtered or driven from their homes on death marches in the early parts of the 1900s. The author is the daughter of the woman in the story, so it's also the story of the daughter's realization and understanding. The structure of the book is also very interesting, because it tells little tidbits here and there as the mother and daughter go back to Turkey to try to find the village where her mother spent her childhood, then it focuses mainly on the mother's story, and then back to the more recent quest. The story is told with compassion and understanding and without malice towards the Turkish people.

As a small child, we had Armenian neighbors and I had known of the Aremenian genocide before, but I did not know of the Assyrian and Pontic Greek genocides that took place at the same time. The Pontic Greeks lived in their villages in what is now part of Turkey for 3000 years. The fact that their story is mostly unknown seems very strange to me, though the book addresses why.

[♥️Annete♥️loves❤️books♥️ · Rating 4 out of 5]

Η ιστορία ζωής της Σάνο Χαλο ή αλλιώς Θυμιας, η οποία ξεριζωθηκε μαζί με την οικογένεια της από ένα πανέμορφο χωριό του Πόντου. Η βαρβαρότητα, οι πορείες θανάτου και η πείνα σύντομα εξοντώσαν τη μητέρα και τα αδέρφια της, η ίδια δώθηκε σε μια ασσυριακη οικογένεια ώστε να έχει μια καλύτερη ζωή, αλλά και εκεί παντού δυστυχία και κακουχίες, ώσπου η 15χρονη πλέον Σάνο, παντρεύεται από προξενιό τον Αμερικανό, ασσυριακης καταγωγής, Αβραάμ Χαλο , ο οποίος ούτε λίγο ούτε πολύ την περνάει 30 χρόνια, μετακομίζουν στην Αμερική, κάνουν μαζί δέκα παιδιά και μέσα από πολλές περιπέτειες καταφέρνουν να τα μεγαλώσουν. Ένα ταξίδι ψυχής με μνήμες που παραμένουν πάντοτε νωπές και υπενθυμίζουν τα δύσκολα εκείνα χρόνια, ανθρώπους που τα χάσανε όλα, αλλά παρέμειναν δυνατοι και σαν δέντρα με γερές ρίζες μας διδάσκουν από τις ιστορίες της ζωής τους. Μια τέτοια είναι και η ιστορία της Σάνο, που από την απόλυτη ευτυχία των παιδικών της χρόνων, βίωσε τον όλεθρο, αλλά κατάφερε να βγει νικήτρια της ζωής και φωτεινό παράδειγμα πως ότι κι αν γίνει πρέπει να κοιτάμε πάντα με αισιοδοξία το μέλλον. Πραγματική ιστορία με ηχηρά μηνύματα!!!

[Elena Sala · Rating 5 out of 5]

Most people are aware of the Turkish genocide of the Armenians in 1915, but fewer have heard about the enormous scale of the tragedy that befell other Christian groups in Turkey at the end of World War I. The harrowing story of the slaughter of two million Pontic Greeks, Assyrians and Armenians in Turkey after WWI comes to vivid life in Sano Halo's memoir, NOT EVEN MY NAME (2000), as told by her daughter Thea. Thea starts by describing a trip she took with her mother Sano, then aged 79, to find her lost Pontic village. She then tells her mother’s story interspersing some necessary background information.

Actually, Sano's real name was Themía. When Themía was nine or ten years old, Turkish soldiers ordered all the Christians families out of the village on a long death-march south, without food, water, shelter, or any other necessities of life.

Along the way, three sisters died, leaving Themía with only her mother, father, one sister and her brother. Not able to provide food for the family, Themía's parents left her with a surrogate family who treated her harshly and changed her name to Sano, claiming they couldn't pronounce her real name. At the age of 15, Sano was sold into marriage to an Assyrian, three times her age, who had returned from America to find a wife.

This summary does no justice to this eloquent, sad story of suffering and survival, seductively narrated in a poetic language which describes not only the landscape but all the small details of everyday life in Sano's Pontic home. Thea Halo is an artist and a painter with a great eye for detail. However, hard, historical facts are not absent from this memoir:

“But the most dramatic change in Turkey was the slaughter of 1.5 million Armenians, 750,000 Assyrians, and 353,000 Pontic Greeks, and the cruel death marches to exile of 1.5 million more Greeks of Turkey; death marches on which countless other Pontians lost their lives, all between 1915 and 1923. This genocide, euphemistically termed “ethnic cleansing,” and “relocation,” eliminated most, if not all, of the Christian minorities in Turkey, and brought to a tragic end the 3,000 year history of the Pontic Greeks in Asia Minor.”

A highly recommend, eye opening book.

[Annika L · Rating 4 out of 5]

After hearing about her mother’s history, Thea Halo hoped to take her mother, Sano, back to her childhood home in Turkey. However, when she tried to find the old village on any maps, there was no such place. They decide to return to Turkey anyways and do more research there, and on the way, we hear more about Sano’s complicated past.
She had a great childhood with her grandparents, parents, and siblings. Her life was free of any troubles until she and her family were forced by Turkish soldiers to leave. They traveled with many of their neighbors without enough food or water, watching their friends and family die around them. Then, they decide to leave the soldiers at night and run away looking for food and water, which they find, but in return Sano had to stay with a complete stranger to help with cooking and taking care of the children. After she is continually mistreated and finds that most of her family has died, Sano runs away again to find another person to stay with. These people care for her as if she was their own daughter, but arrange for her to get married to a man three times her age. Next, she moves to America with her new husband, only to experience new problems.
When Thea and Sano finally find the remains of the old village, they are surprised with what they find.
I liked how this book brought necessary attention to a historic event that isn’t well known. Even though it’s much easier to research now, not long ago, this topic was hard to find information on. It also showed how much history affects us today, and why it’s important, which I found interesting. I think it could have said a bit more about Thea and Sano’s experience, finding the villages, but I still think this is a great book for anyone interested in Turkish history or people interested in historic events from different perspectives.

[Jane · Rating 3 out of 5]

More like 2.5. I wanted to like this book more than I did but the book did not meet my expectations. The book was framed with the author's mother, Sano, returning to Turkey after many years to see if the house and village in which she had lived as a child were still there, how things had changed, and at the last, her visit. In between, the author recounts her mother's story through the years, from childhood, the Greek villagers' expulsion by the Turkish government, and a death march of the Pontians [Greeks living in the Black Sea area]. We read of Sano's life with an Assyrian family in south Turkey--they even change her name from Themia to Sano; with an Armenian couple in Aleppo; and eventual marriage to a man decades older than she, Abraham. Finally, the two come to America and they raise their own family. Much of Sano's life was horrendous and heart-breaking.

I may be wrong but I felt this book was really more fiction than biography; I fault someone for misrepresentation. To me much sounded implausible, and how could an old woman remember SO many details? The photos added to the book but there were even no acknowledgements. The book did move along smoothly; it was written in a simple, childlike manner. The history the author included was fascinating. And I did enjoy reading about the customs and culture of the peoples in that area. I also learned about an area of history I know little about. The author's mother turned out to be a wise, loving person and I am so glad she did not hate the Turks of years past and those of today. In fact, a pleasant young Turkish man helps her find the location of her village.

[Lilisa · Rating 5 out of 5]

There’s a worthwhile reason to recount history – in the hope that it’s never repeated… Not Even My Name is a heartbreaking account of Sano Halo, a Pontic Greek who lived in Turkey as a child and whose family had deep roots in Turkey having lived there for generations. But between 1915 and 1923, more than 350,000 Pontic Greeks, 750,000 Assyrians and 1.5 million Armenians were slaughtered and more than 1.5 million Greeks were exiled from Turkey. At the age of 10, Sano, her entire family and villagers were evicted from their homes and sent off on a march to exile just because they were Christian Greeks. What follows is the devastating account of the family, the loss of life and the utter disregard for it. But the story is also one of survival, hope and the endurance of the human spirit – how despite the harshest of circumstances, Sano survived and began a new life in America – land of the free, outwardly practically obliterating the one she had left behind in Turkey, rarely talking about her childhood to her own children and being the ultimate “American” mother. However, at the instigation and support of her daughter Thea, at the age of 79, Sano returns to Turkey to retrace her steps to search for the home and village she grew up in and the beautiful land she always remembered. A poignant and touching memoir well worth the read.

[Archodoula Vlg · Rating 5 out of 5]

8/5

I had people. I had love that went beyond the present. That went beyond my own lifetime and my own small life. A love that was somehow ancient. That was connected to the beginning of time.

this book was UNBELIEVABLE!!!

It is about the Greek and Assyrian genocide which took place about 100 yeras ago. Being a Greek, I can sympathise with Sano(the mother of Thea Halo). Before i read this book, I thought that the genocide was just some heartless attacks against Greeks who lived there for about 1,000 years before Turkish came. But reading this book i realized that the genocides that took place weren't just the asaults. They were also the culture left behind, seeing family and friends dying from hunger, fatigue and emotional pain. It was for the children that died trying to survive, the mothers who didnt even have the time to give birth to their babies.

The message of the book is deep and clear at the same time. You have to live no matter what. That is the point of the book. After all, Sano kept living after losing everyone in her family. She had faith and she was an incredible woman.

[Doreen · Rating 5 out of 5]

This story is, quite honestly, one of the most touching, lovingly written memoirs I've read. The daughter helps tell her mother's story. It is written with historical fact that is not widely known, as well as with the years of memories her mother has stored in her heart.

The Turks drove her mother's people from their land in death marches that we are not taught about in school. Everything is stolen from her mom. Her mother is robbed of her childhood, her innocence, her parents, her siblings, .....and even her own name.
Eventually, she marries and comes to America. Her life there, is one of a doting, immigrant mother, and an obedient wife. Her life is for her children, always.

It's amazing that she is able to be the loving, kind, generous woman that she is, after all the unkindness, cruelty, and loss she has experienced. Yes, it's a sad story, but also a happy, hopeful story. As her mother, Themia/Santo, has always told her........It is up to us, what we make of our lives.....not of the things that we can't control, but of the things that we CAN control.

[Michele Benson · Rating 4 out of 5]

I want to give this book 4.5 stars, because I really did like it. The author tells her mother's story in such a wonderful way. Again, I am embarrassed to say that I did not even know this genocide happened. I mentioned this story to an elderly friend and she was astonished that I had never heard about the atrocities committed, not only against the Pontic Greeks, but also the Armenians and Assyrians. She and her husband had been missionaries in Africa at that time and she knew many people who had been killed or displaced during this death march across Turkey. This book was a great read and I loved the pictures of Sano, Abraham and their children.

[Deborah · Rating 3 out of 5]

The central part of this book was a little melodramatic for my taste, although the melodrama was certainly warranted. Genocide deserves to be honored by anger and tears, but the heroine's tears are the tears of a child. By the end, though, the account of Sano's mundane adult life negates the horrible circumstances of her childhood. Too bad she and her daughter Thea aren't sure if they really found her childhood home when they go back to Iondone (Ag. Antoni) in 1989.

[Theo Anastopoulo · Rating 5 out of 5]

Powerful, Thea Halo recounts her mother's life as a Pontic Greek living in Turkey and her forced dislocation following WWI and Turkey’s notorious death marches. Enjoyed the scenes of village life and especially Sano's journey to America. Would highly recommend, great narrative to use for comparing to the current refugee crisis.

[Magda]

This was a phenomenal tear-jerker. I still don't really understand how Themía/Sano would not feel angry towards the people who treated her so horribly.

It also makes me wonder how one goes about interviewing one's parents to extract and compile their stories.

[Mack · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book meant a lot to me having Greek heritage but was a horrific and brutal story I needed to read. The deliberate annihilation of content communities is hard to comprehend and Sano’s courage to survive in such a hostile environment touched me deeply.

[Τασούλα Γιαννοπούλου · Rating 3 out of 5]

Τα βιβλία που αναφέρονται στην γενοκτονία των Ποντίων και στην Μικρασιατικη καταστροφή έχουν ξεχωριστή θέση στην καρδιά μου και στην βιβλιοθήκη μου.
Παρ’ όλα αυτά, το συγκεκριμένο αν και στο πρώτο μισό του φαινόταν πολλά υποσχόμενο και άκρως συγκινησιακό, η κορύφωση δεν ήρθε ποτε.. Ίσως φταίει ο τρόπος γραφής της συγγραφέως - κόρης της πρωταγωνίστριας -.
Σε κάθε περίπτωση, προσθέτει ένα ακόμα λιθαράκι στη γνώση και κατανόηση αυτής της σελίδας της Ιστορίας.

[Ella Stamolis · Rating 4 out of 5]

4 1/2⭐️

[Ria Liekens · Rating 3 out of 5]

Verhaal levens echt De geschiedenis van de lands streek te belastend

[Lynne · Rating 5 out of 5]

An amazing story! So well written, I just wanted to savor this story though often heart breaking.