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The Afterlife of Billy Fingers: How My Bad-Boy Brother Proved to Me There's Life After Death
Suffering from world-weariness, former singer/songwriter Annie Kagan gave up her life in New York City and moved to a small house by the bay. While trying to figure out what to do with her life, her brother Billy died unexpectedly.
A few weeks after his death, Billy woke his sister at dawn. "It’s Billy, darling! I’m drifting weightlessly through gorgeous galaxies and I feel a loving, beneficent presence twinkling all around me.” Was Billy real or just a figment of her imagination? In The Afterlife of Billy Fingers, Kagan shares her unprecedented journey into the mysteries of the afterlife. Billy’s ongoing account of his celestial experiences is filled with transcendent wisdom, irreverent humor, and hope. The Afterlife of Billy Fingers will change the way you think about life, death, and the Universe.
Another time, Billy says, “If I could give you a gift it would be to find the glory inside yourself, beyond the roles and the drama, so you can dance the dance of the game with a little more rhythm, a little more abandon, a little more shaking those hips.”
In his foreword, Dr. Raymond Moody, author of Life after Life, explains the phenomena of walkers between the worlds, known to us since ancient times, but still surprising to way too many of us.
A few weeks after his death, Billy woke his sister at dawn. "It’s Billy, darling! I’m drifting weightlessly through gorgeous galaxies and I feel a loving, beneficent presence twinkling all around me.” Was Billy real or just a figment of her imagination? In The Afterlife of Billy Fingers, Kagan shares her unprecedented journey into the mysteries of the afterlife. Billy’s ongoing account of his celestial experiences is filled with transcendent wisdom, irreverent humor, and hope. The Afterlife of Billy Fingers will change the way you think about life, death, and the Universe.
Another time, Billy says, “If I could give you a gift it would be to find the glory inside yourself, beyond the roles and the drama, so you can dance the dance of the game with a little more rhythm, a little more abandon, a little more shaking those hips.”
In his foreword, Dr. Raymond Moody, author of Life after Life, explains the phenomena of walkers between the worlds, known to us since ancient times, but still surprising to way too many of us.
211 pages, Kindle Edition
First published March 1, 2013
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 621 reviews
October 27, 2013
I became interested in this book due to a recent NDE experience I had while in the hospital. I was inspired by all the rave reviews on both Goodreads and Amazon, but as I made it through the first couple chapters, my bull*!^# meter crept further and further into the red...
She quit her job and moved to a lovely house on the water, deciding to become a writer. All of a sudden her dead brother is communicating with her and demanding she write a book! That does seem rather convenient, doesn't it?. I find it interesting that "her brother" keeps referring to Eastern philosophy, even though she is the one who is supposedly studying it and meditating for hours upon hours of her day. The whole thing is poorly contrived, right down to the inclusion of Tex (got to add the sassy sidekick to complete the formula, right?).
I am still creeped out that someone would create such an elaborate lie regarding a family member's death, and all to make a buck. If you like this, check out Sylvia Brown.
It is nice to think that spirits are communicating with us and reassuring humanity that we will be fine when we die (we will float around in pure bliss, forgiven) but I somehow doubt that they want people to profit off of this information. It seems they have lost the concept of time, but still hold onto the concept of the almighty dollar?
Also, what is up with the constant use of "Mommy" and "Daddy"?
She quit her job and moved to a lovely house on the water, deciding to become a writer. All of a sudden her dead brother is communicating with her and demanding she write a book! That does seem rather convenient, doesn't it?. I find it interesting that "her brother" keeps referring to Eastern philosophy, even though she is the one who is supposedly studying it and meditating for hours upon hours of her day. The whole thing is poorly contrived, right down to the inclusion of Tex (got to add the sassy sidekick to complete the formula, right?).
I am still creeped out that someone would create such an elaborate lie regarding a family member's death, and all to make a buck. If you like this, check out Sylvia Brown.
It is nice to think that spirits are communicating with us and reassuring humanity that we will be fine when we die (we will float around in pure bliss, forgiven) but I somehow doubt that they want people to profit off of this information. It seems they have lost the concept of time, but still hold onto the concept of the almighty dollar?
Also, what is up with the constant use of "Mommy" and "Daddy"?
July 6, 2013
WOW! I LOVE this book! Congratulations to Annie Kagan and her brother for accomplishing their Mission and creating the most extraordinary book I’ve read in a long time!
I was 146 pages into Dan Brown’s latest, Inferno, when The Afterlife of Billy Fingers arrived in the mail. I pulled it out of the box, laid it on top of Inferno, and didn’t stop reading until 50 pages later. It was that captivating! Only necessity forced me to walk away, and I finished the book as fast as possible after that. I still haven’t gone back to Inferno. As I told my husband, “Why would I want to wander around Dante’s hell with Dan Brown when I could be reading about Billy’s adventures in the Higher Worlds?”
Even more exciting to me, Billy confirms so many of the life principles I’ve been studying throughout my adult life, in books by the visionary scientist Ernest L. Norman ( The Voice of Venus and The Infinite Concept of Cosmic Creation ) and now in my own books ( Cosmic Dancer and Speed Your Evolution Become the Star Being You Are Meant to Be ). In fact, if I’d asked my Cosmic CoAuthors to deliver a book that would validate their interdimensional view of human life, their schematic of repeated incarnations with long sojourns of learning in Higher Worlds, their view of life as a series of Infinite possibilities and extended potential for individual, soulic growth—Billy Fingers would be it.
As Billy soars into higher dimensions, forestalling his own rapid ascension in order to share his journey with us, he takes away so many fears and insecurities that I hope the book soon rises to the top of the bestseller’s lists, for the benefit of humanity on Earth.
I applaud his sister Annie, as well, for her courage in creating the book, finding a publisher, and allowing their story to become public. I know how difficult that journey is, and how much she must have overcome and sacrificed to accomplish it. At the same time, as you’ll read, she was the number one beneficiary of Billy’s projected Consciousness, so her rewards were ample as well. She’s done an amazing job of keeping her own story to precisely the right amount of detail, while allowing Billy’s adventures to shine.
Perhaps his recent “bad-boy” lifetime equipped Billy with many of the “skills” of survival and determination that allowed him to bend and perhaps break a few rules in order to create his book from beyond! I don’t want to spoil the surprises the book holds for its readers, but he certainly pushed the envelope to reveal perhaps more of the afterlife than we’ve seen from a first-hand participant in many an age. I take the appearance of this collaborative work to be a wonderful indicator of more positive developments for this needy planet! If we are ready for Billy Fingers, then we must surely be ready for the huge, spiritual leap so many have predicted.
And to the doubters who think perhaps she made it all up—no way. All my sources and study tell me that Billy Fingers is more real than most of what you’ll find between the covers of books. Even if you believe it came from her own extended Mind, it all rings true, carrying the higher-frequency, healing, energetic imprint of the many Minds who helped make such an interdimensional collaboration possible.
Bravo, bravo to Annie and Billy and their Cosmic CoAuthors! And now I’m ready to read it again. Thank you!
I was 146 pages into Dan Brown’s latest, Inferno, when The Afterlife of Billy Fingers arrived in the mail. I pulled it out of the box, laid it on top of Inferno, and didn’t stop reading until 50 pages later. It was that captivating! Only necessity forced me to walk away, and I finished the book as fast as possible after that. I still haven’t gone back to Inferno. As I told my husband, “Why would I want to wander around Dante’s hell with Dan Brown when I could be reading about Billy’s adventures in the Higher Worlds?”
Even more exciting to me, Billy confirms so many of the life principles I’ve been studying throughout my adult life, in books by the visionary scientist Ernest L. Norman ( The Voice of Venus and The Infinite Concept of Cosmic Creation ) and now in my own books ( Cosmic Dancer and Speed Your Evolution Become the Star Being You Are Meant to Be ). In fact, if I’d asked my Cosmic CoAuthors to deliver a book that would validate their interdimensional view of human life, their schematic of repeated incarnations with long sojourns of learning in Higher Worlds, their view of life as a series of Infinite possibilities and extended potential for individual, soulic growth—Billy Fingers would be it.
As Billy soars into higher dimensions, forestalling his own rapid ascension in order to share his journey with us, he takes away so many fears and insecurities that I hope the book soon rises to the top of the bestseller’s lists, for the benefit of humanity on Earth.
I applaud his sister Annie, as well, for her courage in creating the book, finding a publisher, and allowing their story to become public. I know how difficult that journey is, and how much she must have overcome and sacrificed to accomplish it. At the same time, as you’ll read, she was the number one beneficiary of Billy’s projected Consciousness, so her rewards were ample as well. She’s done an amazing job of keeping her own story to precisely the right amount of detail, while allowing Billy’s adventures to shine.
Perhaps his recent “bad-boy” lifetime equipped Billy with many of the “skills” of survival and determination that allowed him to bend and perhaps break a few rules in order to create his book from beyond! I don’t want to spoil the surprises the book holds for its readers, but he certainly pushed the envelope to reveal perhaps more of the afterlife than we’ve seen from a first-hand participant in many an age. I take the appearance of this collaborative work to be a wonderful indicator of more positive developments for this needy planet! If we are ready for Billy Fingers, then we must surely be ready for the huge, spiritual leap so many have predicted.
And to the doubters who think perhaps she made it all up—no way. All my sources and study tell me that Billy Fingers is more real than most of what you’ll find between the covers of books. Even if you believe it came from her own extended Mind, it all rings true, carrying the higher-frequency, healing, energetic imprint of the many Minds who helped make such an interdimensional collaboration possible.
Bravo, bravo to Annie and Billy and their Cosmic CoAuthors! And now I’m ready to read it again. Thank you!
September 8, 2016
I think anyone who has lost a loved one wishes to talk to them again. Annie Kagan was granted that wish. She wasn't a practicing channeler, so it came as a huge surprise to her when she heard her dead brother's voice speaking to her from a spot above her head. At the time that this happened, Annie was living a hermit's life in New England only venturing out to kick ideas around at her writer's group. So, that gave her the space and time to explore these communications rather than running to the doctor to have the voice medicated away.
At first, she was reluctant to share what she was hearing, afraid that Billy's voice was her mind's way of holding the grief away or that other people would think she was going insane, but the information imparted became more and more specific until she couldn't explain it away. Through the experience and sharing it, Annie came to believe without a doubt that the spirit continues on after death. She took comfort from it and hopes, with this book, to share that comfort with others who may be grieving or afraid of death itself.
The Afterlife of Billy Fingers isn't going to appeal to everyone. If you don't believe that communications from beyond the grave are possible, I'd suggest passing on this book. And, towards the end of Billy's travels into the afterlife, things get really far out as he lets go of his previous self and becomes the universe, embodying the entirety of reality. It reminded me of Be Here Now by Ram Dass, hippie to the extreme. But, that's the type of spirituality I'm into, so I loved it.
The introduction by Raymond Moody describes Billy as a modern psychopomp, someone who guides the spirits of others through the afterlife: "The experiences Dr. Kagan relates are completely consistent with the kind of role walkers between the worlds played in antiquity. And that is no surprise to me. I think that such experiences are part of the collective psychological heritage of humankind- not artifacts of any one culture." pg 11, ebook.
Billy was a drug addict and led a very hard life. This is what he had to say about it: "How do I know my life wasn't some punishment for my past transgressions? Well, because there's no such thing. You're not on earth to be punished. ... That's a human concept. Something man made up. Humans make up stuff and then they believe it". pg 24, ebook. A continuation along that line of thinking later in the book: "Beliefs are big on earth. People collect them. Some of these beliefs are helpful, but others just keep you running around trying to follow rules that others have laid down. They don't have a lot of personal meaning. It's a good idea to sort through your beliefs now and then and throw out the ones that don't serve you." pg 85, ebook
Annie dealt with a bunch of her own issues in this book, like the fact that by writing this book, people were going to think she was "flaky". At one point in the narrative, she has a toothache and starts to believe that she's being punished for revealing universal truths that should be kept secret. She eventually gets past that attitude, but, when it comes to the unknown, I think fear can be a major hurdle: "After my toothache and the painful root canal and awful infection that followed, I was scared. ... who was I to be the one to prove there's life after death? Maybe some secrets shouldn't be revealed. Maybe I was breaking a sacred taboo, dabbling in a cosmic Pandora's box." pg 41, ebook.
Another of the Be Here Now moments: "In your world, as the earth moves around the sun, there's nothing but shadow for a good part of the time. The mystery of life on earth cannot exist without the shadow element. You cannot have the sea without storms, the earth without quakes, the wind without tornados. ... And sometimes- sometimes darkness is okay too. Don't overlook the riches contained in the darkness. Life's very temporary, so don't let time just pass. Let the moments fill you- the ones you judge to be good as well as bad." pg 77, ebook. Solid advice.
Let's end with one more bit of wisdom: "People spend lots of time on things that make them unhappy- too much focus on the sand in the oyster. To cultivate joy, pay attention to what you like." pg 116
Recommended for spiritual seekers and people who enjoy reading about near death experiences/channeled wisdom. Some read alikes: Conversations with God: An Uncommon Dialogue, Vol. 1 by Neale Donald Walsch, My Son and the Afterlife: Conversations from the Other Side by Elisa Medhus, Ask and It Is Given: Learning to Manifest Your Desires by Esther Hicks or, if you're looking to introduce more joy into your life: Thank & Grow Rich: A 30-Day Experiment in Shameless Gratitude and Unabashed Joy by Pam Grout.
At first, she was reluctant to share what she was hearing, afraid that Billy's voice was her mind's way of holding the grief away or that other people would think she was going insane, but the information imparted became more and more specific until she couldn't explain it away. Through the experience and sharing it, Annie came to believe without a doubt that the spirit continues on after death. She took comfort from it and hopes, with this book, to share that comfort with others who may be grieving or afraid of death itself.
The Afterlife of Billy Fingers isn't going to appeal to everyone. If you don't believe that communications from beyond the grave are possible, I'd suggest passing on this book. And, towards the end of Billy's travels into the afterlife, things get really far out as he lets go of his previous self and becomes the universe, embodying the entirety of reality. It reminded me of Be Here Now by Ram Dass, hippie to the extreme. But, that's the type of spirituality I'm into, so I loved it.
The introduction by Raymond Moody describes Billy as a modern psychopomp, someone who guides the spirits of others through the afterlife: "The experiences Dr. Kagan relates are completely consistent with the kind of role walkers between the worlds played in antiquity. And that is no surprise to me. I think that such experiences are part of the collective psychological heritage of humankind- not artifacts of any one culture." pg 11, ebook.
Billy was a drug addict and led a very hard life. This is what he had to say about it: "How do I know my life wasn't some punishment for my past transgressions? Well, because there's no such thing. You're not on earth to be punished. ... That's a human concept. Something man made up. Humans make up stuff and then they believe it". pg 24, ebook. A continuation along that line of thinking later in the book: "Beliefs are big on earth. People collect them. Some of these beliefs are helpful, but others just keep you running around trying to follow rules that others have laid down. They don't have a lot of personal meaning. It's a good idea to sort through your beliefs now and then and throw out the ones that don't serve you." pg 85, ebook
Annie dealt with a bunch of her own issues in this book, like the fact that by writing this book, people were going to think she was "flaky". At one point in the narrative, she has a toothache and starts to believe that she's being punished for revealing universal truths that should be kept secret. She eventually gets past that attitude, but, when it comes to the unknown, I think fear can be a major hurdle: "After my toothache and the painful root canal and awful infection that followed, I was scared. ... who was I to be the one to prove there's life after death? Maybe some secrets shouldn't be revealed. Maybe I was breaking a sacred taboo, dabbling in a cosmic Pandora's box." pg 41, ebook.
Another of the Be Here Now moments: "In your world, as the earth moves around the sun, there's nothing but shadow for a good part of the time. The mystery of life on earth cannot exist without the shadow element. You cannot have the sea without storms, the earth without quakes, the wind without tornados. ... And sometimes- sometimes darkness is okay too. Don't overlook the riches contained in the darkness. Life's very temporary, so don't let time just pass. Let the moments fill you- the ones you judge to be good as well as bad." pg 77, ebook. Solid advice.
Let's end with one more bit of wisdom: "People spend lots of time on things that make them unhappy- too much focus on the sand in the oyster. To cultivate joy, pay attention to what you like." pg 116
Recommended for spiritual seekers and people who enjoy reading about near death experiences/channeled wisdom. Some read alikes: Conversations with God: An Uncommon Dialogue, Vol. 1 by Neale Donald Walsch, My Son and the Afterlife: Conversations from the Other Side by Elisa Medhus, Ask and It Is Given: Learning to Manifest Your Desires by Esther Hicks or, if you're looking to introduce more joy into your life: Thank & Grow Rich: A 30-Day Experiment in Shameless Gratitude and Unabashed Joy by Pam Grout.
March 4, 2016
Having just lost my beloved brother- I was clamoring to read this book.
As much as I desperately wanted to love this book. I don't.
The premise is amazing. A writer's addicted older brother, Billy Fingers, dies in a tragic accident. The writer, Annie Kagan- Billy's sister, was out of contact with Billy, so it is a very complicated death and grief (as they all are really). Annie is living in a beach house; meditating, writing a book, grieving when her brother shows up to comfort her and, you are NEVER going to believe this, write a book with her.
From here it just gets more and more implausible. She goes a little whacko girl-friendy on him.
"WHY AREN'T YOU TALKING TO ME? Damn you! Come talk to me! STOP talking to me! Where are you? I am freaking out! No, I am fine, no- I'm not! Go AWAY!"
It was all very trite and unconvincing. Trust me. No one, NO ONE on this entire green marble of an earth wants this story to be true more than me. I actually gave my brother the what-for for not coming and chatting me up after he died, but here we are. A story with a great foundation and the rest feeling contrived and utterly unbelievable. I am someone who thinks Sylvia Brown is pretty dead on. I am not a skeptic by any means, and this story doesn't work for me.
It was uneven from the start.
In his first visits, Billy is children's Bible school teacher- sweet and kind, and then he is scaring Annie in the shower like Vincent Price. He dances around talking about the Akashic Records, he has an Indian soul guide, and then he has Angels. It reads like a buffet style of every Eastern mysticism, dashes of Christianity, a little new age-y and yet, Billy never calls anything by what Annie (or any of the rest of us) would recognize. Then Annie Kagan described herself as a cosmic detective and I was off the bus.
If you can get it at the library I would suggest giving it a read. It is simply written and not too mentally challenging. I polished it in an evening.
As much as I desperately wanted to love this book. I don't.
The premise is amazing. A writer's addicted older brother, Billy Fingers, dies in a tragic accident. The writer, Annie Kagan- Billy's sister, was out of contact with Billy, so it is a very complicated death and grief (as they all are really). Annie is living in a beach house; meditating, writing a book, grieving when her brother shows up to comfort her and, you are NEVER going to believe this, write a book with her.
From here it just gets more and more implausible. She goes a little whacko girl-friendy on him.
"WHY AREN'T YOU TALKING TO ME? Damn you! Come talk to me! STOP talking to me! Where are you? I am freaking out! No, I am fine, no- I'm not! Go AWAY!"
It was all very trite and unconvincing. Trust me. No one, NO ONE on this entire green marble of an earth wants this story to be true more than me. I actually gave my brother the what-for for not coming and chatting me up after he died, but here we are. A story with a great foundation and the rest feeling contrived and utterly unbelievable. I am someone who thinks Sylvia Brown is pretty dead on. I am not a skeptic by any means, and this story doesn't work for me.
It was uneven from the start.
In his first visits, Billy is children's Bible school teacher- sweet and kind, and then he is scaring Annie in the shower like Vincent Price. He dances around talking about the Akashic Records, he has an Indian soul guide, and then he has Angels. It reads like a buffet style of every Eastern mysticism, dashes of Christianity, a little new age-y and yet, Billy never calls anything by what Annie (or any of the rest of us) would recognize. Then Annie Kagan described herself as a cosmic detective and I was off the bus.
If you can get it at the library I would suggest giving it a read. It is simply written and not too mentally challenging. I polished it in an evening.
November 23, 2014
In "The Afterlife of Billy Fingers" Annie Kagan, a Manhattan chiropractor and songwriter, claims that her dead brother, William Cohen, a 62 year old recovering heroin addict and ex-con who was killed in a drunken car accident, explains the mysteries of the universe.
Kagan claims that Billy, as she calls her late brother, provided proof to her that his presence was real. For example, Billy communicates cryptic information to Kagan like "Give Tex a coin" and "There is no sunshine without the sun" and "Take Bach flower remedies." Later, Kagan claims, these cryptic sentences came to have great meaning. This meaning convinced Kagan that she wasn't merely imagining that her dead brother was speaking to her; he really was.
If these incidences are genuine, and if indeed the entire point of "The Afterlife of Billy Fingers" is, as Kagan claims, to aid humanity, then Kagan should be able to do for the general public what she did for those close to her. Kagan and Billy should be able to produce messages that later pan out as true. So far, though, Kagan and Billy have not done this. That being the case, Kagan's claim remains completely implausible.
The reader is left asking whether Kagan simply imagined Billy's monologues, or if Kagan is a manipulator exploiting human grief and fear to make money and achieve guru status.
Kagan describes her own life in bare bones detail. There is little description or depth. She mentions that she is separated from her husband but that they are still in contact. No details are provided about either the separation or the continued contact. She lives in a beach house, which sounds lovely and I would have liked vivid details to help me see her home and the nearby water. There are none.
I don't believe that ghosts can dictate multiple paragraphs of prose, including semi-colons, brackets, and no misunderstood vocabulary words. I have transcribed interviews with living informants, and transcription is a demanding, time-consuming chore. I often have to rewind recorded interviews several times before I can be sure that I am getting words down correctly. Kagan doesn't seem to have this concern. Billy apparently speaks with supernatural precision. Kagan never needs to ask, "Did you mean 'blue' as in the color or 'blew' as in the past tense of 'blow'"? This is the kind of question that transcribers must often ask.
I also did not find Billy believable as a character. The most genuine and raw truth Kagan reveals in her book is the agony of a younger sister who was a loved and good child who lost her beloved older brother to addiction and dysfunction. Annie and Billy's parents were open in their preference for her, not him. Billy behaved badly toward Annie. "I was your own personal James Dean…I ignored you." Kagan tried to save Billy, and failed. Kagan does not write a memoir spelling out the day-to-day hurts of family dysfunction. Rather, she sketches out her history with Billy quickly, and devotes the bulk of the book to his alleged cosmic revelations.
Billy doesn't read to me as a believable sexagenarian heroin addict and alcoholic who has achieved moksha – transcendence. He reads like the creation of a broken-hearted sister finding slim comfort in the kind of shallow, muddled New Age ideals one could pick up by browsing the items near the cashier while waiting in line to check out of a store selling crystals and patchouli incense.
The bulk of Billy's verbiage is directed to Kagan and their bruised and bruising relationship. She worshipped and tried to save him; he resented her, ignored her, and let her down. Suddenly he's in heaven and she's all he's got time for. There are passages that read almost as incestuous. Billy refers to Kagan as "my darling." "Who but you could I tell my secrets to, my darling?" I believe all this as Kagan working out her issues.
Finally I don't believe that Billy is the disembodied voice of William Cohen returning to educate humanity because the cosmic secrets Billy "reveals" are secondhand and shallow, example, "Pain is just part of the human experience…our lives are temporary" Also: there is no such thing as good or bad and you have everything you need.
When Billy wants to communicate how important something is, he describes it as physically large. For example one afterlife entity is important because it is bigger than the sun. Size is a child's way of understanding importance. Billy's visions are earthbound. He describes his own afterlife as floating around in space past stars and planets, "I'm drifting weightlessly through space with these gorgeous stars and moons and galaxies twinkling all around me." In heaven, people wear robes, and they are better looking "than the best looking actor."
Billy encounters his deceased wife, a gorgeous, Swedish, blonde Vegas showgirl, and she is still gorgeous, Swedish, and blonde, and she puts on a cootchie dance for him, but she does it in the form of sexy planets.
Eventually Billy dissolves into oneness, a Hindu idea. In fact Kagan uses a Sanskrit term, "Ishvara," to talk about one of the divine entities Billy encounters. Kagan decides that she and Billy descend from the Lohani, a Pashtun tribe. Kagan has studied Eastern religions and it's easy to see where she picked up these theological trinkets.
I'm guessing that Kagan and her brother are of Jewish descent. One of the saddest aspects of "Billy Fingers" is that in imagining her afterlife and answers to the cosmic questions, Kagan has no use for Judaism whatsoever. Her text is reflective of Jewbu, those modern Jews who have traded their ancestral riches for a vitiated and commodified version of Buddhism and Hinduism.
Billy introduces Kagan to Lena Olin, the movie star. He never inspires her to perform a kindness for another person for which there is no payoff. He does warn Kagan's friend Tex about her drinking, but the point of that episode was to prove that Billy knew things he could not know if he were not a supernatural entity. Kagan does not record playing any role in Tex's recovery. The lack of earthbound service in Billy's heaven is not very deep.
Kagan claims that Billy, as she calls her late brother, provided proof to her that his presence was real. For example, Billy communicates cryptic information to Kagan like "Give Tex a coin" and "There is no sunshine without the sun" and "Take Bach flower remedies." Later, Kagan claims, these cryptic sentences came to have great meaning. This meaning convinced Kagan that she wasn't merely imagining that her dead brother was speaking to her; he really was.
If these incidences are genuine, and if indeed the entire point of "The Afterlife of Billy Fingers" is, as Kagan claims, to aid humanity, then Kagan should be able to do for the general public what she did for those close to her. Kagan and Billy should be able to produce messages that later pan out as true. So far, though, Kagan and Billy have not done this. That being the case, Kagan's claim remains completely implausible.
The reader is left asking whether Kagan simply imagined Billy's monologues, or if Kagan is a manipulator exploiting human grief and fear to make money and achieve guru status.
Kagan describes her own life in bare bones detail. There is little description or depth. She mentions that she is separated from her husband but that they are still in contact. No details are provided about either the separation or the continued contact. She lives in a beach house, which sounds lovely and I would have liked vivid details to help me see her home and the nearby water. There are none.
I don't believe that ghosts can dictate multiple paragraphs of prose, including semi-colons, brackets, and no misunderstood vocabulary words. I have transcribed interviews with living informants, and transcription is a demanding, time-consuming chore. I often have to rewind recorded interviews several times before I can be sure that I am getting words down correctly. Kagan doesn't seem to have this concern. Billy apparently speaks with supernatural precision. Kagan never needs to ask, "Did you mean 'blue' as in the color or 'blew' as in the past tense of 'blow'"? This is the kind of question that transcribers must often ask.
I also did not find Billy believable as a character. The most genuine and raw truth Kagan reveals in her book is the agony of a younger sister who was a loved and good child who lost her beloved older brother to addiction and dysfunction. Annie and Billy's parents were open in their preference for her, not him. Billy behaved badly toward Annie. "I was your own personal James Dean…I ignored you." Kagan tried to save Billy, and failed. Kagan does not write a memoir spelling out the day-to-day hurts of family dysfunction. Rather, she sketches out her history with Billy quickly, and devotes the bulk of the book to his alleged cosmic revelations.
Billy doesn't read to me as a believable sexagenarian heroin addict and alcoholic who has achieved moksha – transcendence. He reads like the creation of a broken-hearted sister finding slim comfort in the kind of shallow, muddled New Age ideals one could pick up by browsing the items near the cashier while waiting in line to check out of a store selling crystals and patchouli incense.
The bulk of Billy's verbiage is directed to Kagan and their bruised and bruising relationship. She worshipped and tried to save him; he resented her, ignored her, and let her down. Suddenly he's in heaven and she's all he's got time for. There are passages that read almost as incestuous. Billy refers to Kagan as "my darling." "Who but you could I tell my secrets to, my darling?" I believe all this as Kagan working out her issues.
Finally I don't believe that Billy is the disembodied voice of William Cohen returning to educate humanity because the cosmic secrets Billy "reveals" are secondhand and shallow, example, "Pain is just part of the human experience…our lives are temporary" Also: there is no such thing as good or bad and you have everything you need.
When Billy wants to communicate how important something is, he describes it as physically large. For example one afterlife entity is important because it is bigger than the sun. Size is a child's way of understanding importance. Billy's visions are earthbound. He describes his own afterlife as floating around in space past stars and planets, "I'm drifting weightlessly through space with these gorgeous stars and moons and galaxies twinkling all around me." In heaven, people wear robes, and they are better looking "than the best looking actor."
Billy encounters his deceased wife, a gorgeous, Swedish, blonde Vegas showgirl, and she is still gorgeous, Swedish, and blonde, and she puts on a cootchie dance for him, but she does it in the form of sexy planets.
Eventually Billy dissolves into oneness, a Hindu idea. In fact Kagan uses a Sanskrit term, "Ishvara," to talk about one of the divine entities Billy encounters. Kagan decides that she and Billy descend from the Lohani, a Pashtun tribe. Kagan has studied Eastern religions and it's easy to see where she picked up these theological trinkets.
I'm guessing that Kagan and her brother are of Jewish descent. One of the saddest aspects of "Billy Fingers" is that in imagining her afterlife and answers to the cosmic questions, Kagan has no use for Judaism whatsoever. Her text is reflective of Jewbu, those modern Jews who have traded their ancestral riches for a vitiated and commodified version of Buddhism and Hinduism.
Billy introduces Kagan to Lena Olin, the movie star. He never inspires her to perform a kindness for another person for which there is no payoff. He does warn Kagan's friend Tex about her drinking, but the point of that episode was to prove that Billy knew things he could not know if he were not a supernatural entity. Kagan does not record playing any role in Tex's recovery. The lack of earthbound service in Billy's heaven is not very deep.
July 26, 2022
uplifting and spiritual look at life after death
This is a rare first person experience of communication with a dead sibling. It is unexpected. It is insightful. It is beautiful. It gives comfort.
This is a rare first person experience of communication with a dead sibling. It is unexpected. It is insightful. It is beautiful. It gives comfort.
March 14, 2013
Wow! This is one of those books where you're either going to think it's right on, or total crap. I really hope people go into this with an open mind, because it is definitely a thought-provoking book. It is very well written, and well, why shouldn't it be? It was written (mostly) by a spirtit. I liked that the author didn't go too far into writing a bunch of filler. What she added from her life and experience through this process was just the right amount of additional information without going off on unneccessary tangents. This book reminded me a lot of Conversations with God, and I understand it is also similar to A Course in Miracles (which I'm just starting.) This was an awesome book. Thank you so much to the author & her brother for sharing their incredible experience.
September 11, 2013
I've read a lot of books on NDE and the afterlife, but this one is different than any of the others. There is not much about reincarnation in this book, but more about what happens when a spirit is ready to reemerge with the universe/source. I read it within 24 hours and I will probably re-read it again and keep it in my collection.
September 27, 2024
This is a subject I’m interested in, because of my 40+ years in healthcare and witnessing hundreds of deaths in that amount of time. I’ve heard about some really interesting experiences that I’m sure are genuine. In fact, ask any experienced nurse, and I’m sure he or she will have two or three weird stories to tell you. I’ve had many of my own experiences, and some are so “out-there” that they’re almost laughable, but that ,to me, makes them all the more interesting. I know my own truth, I’m open to others’ experience. Who am I to tell someone else that their story isn’t true?
But with this book, I may have to call bs. This book is written by a young hope-to-be successful writer. She left her job as a chiropractor and moved to a beach house to write a book. She began attending a writing group. Then ho-ho-what-do-ya-know, her newly deceased brother contacts her and wants to collaborate on a book! Most of the book is his extensive thoughts and after-death experiences. His long winded accounts are transcribed by the author. The author also clearly hears him speak to her, and he gives her several messages to give to her friends in order to prove that he is real. She also sees him in different forms. The communication is so lengthy, so complex, so flawless, so poignant, and so varied in the wisdom of many religions that it’s damn near perfect. Too damn perfect. Better than any phone call. Add to that a flashy book cover that certainly caught my attention, and hearty endorsements of a few television psychics and my suspicions are definitely raised.
If the author had written any other books, maybe I would soften up, but this seems more like a one hit wonder of a money maker. She wrote this book 11 years ago, then…silence. I really hope it’s not, because I would hate to think someone would use their dead brother’s memory to profit from, even if he was a selfish drug addict that disappeared from her life for years at a time. But who knows?
If you want a feel-good sci-fi book and you don’t really care if it’s true, then read this. Sadly, it turned me from an open minded optimist into a cynic in one day.
But with this book, I may have to call bs. This book is written by a young hope-to-be successful writer. She left her job as a chiropractor and moved to a beach house to write a book. She began attending a writing group. Then ho-ho-what-do-ya-know, her newly deceased brother contacts her and wants to collaborate on a book! Most of the book is his extensive thoughts and after-death experiences. His long winded accounts are transcribed by the author. The author also clearly hears him speak to her, and he gives her several messages to give to her friends in order to prove that he is real. She also sees him in different forms. The communication is so lengthy, so complex, so flawless, so poignant, and so varied in the wisdom of many religions that it’s damn near perfect. Too damn perfect. Better than any phone call. Add to that a flashy book cover that certainly caught my attention, and hearty endorsements of a few television psychics and my suspicions are definitely raised.
If the author had written any other books, maybe I would soften up, but this seems more like a one hit wonder of a money maker. She wrote this book 11 years ago, then…silence. I really hope it’s not, because I would hate to think someone would use their dead brother’s memory to profit from, even if he was a selfish drug addict that disappeared from her life for years at a time. But who knows?
If you want a feel-good sci-fi book and you don’t really care if it’s true, then read this. Sadly, it turned me from an open minded optimist into a cynic in one day.
March 24, 2014
Intoxicatingly confirming. This book resonated on so many levels for me. It has the capacity to profoundly affect the reader as long as they allow it. Annie and her brother Billy, who 'has left this dimension and lives' in an alternate dimension for one of a better word, share knowledge and information by lifting the veil on the unseen world of life after death. My most favourite part of this whole book, is that for most of us in this physical dimension, we are "told" not to judge by appearances as they can deceiving. Billy is a true testimony to this, whilst his physical life may not read like the rich and famous in monetary terms, he 'shows' the reader that it is all about the underlying spirit and source of who we are, and often this truth is 'lost' while we digress on this physical plane for our soul evolution. He even goes into the soul contracts that we set up prior to coming into this dimension and being 'born'. Some of the concepts may stretch your belief framework, however, if you are in your heart space as you read this book you will feel the truths come through. A beautifully written and captivating book. As with everything I recommend take what resonates with you and leave the rest behind on the page.
February 19, 2014
I loved the first 3/4 of this book.
Lots of beautiful wisdom.
But the last 1/4 broke with the premiss of the tale: that the other side is not defined by human concepts. It turned a lovely NDE (actually just DE) into poor sci-fi.
Lots of beautiful wisdom.
But the last 1/4 broke with the premiss of the tale: that the other side is not defined by human concepts. It turned a lovely NDE (actually just DE) into poor sci-fi.
January 20, 2014
I have read a LOT of books about the afterlife and the between life states, but this one was a bit more personal and simply verified all that I already knew once again. Annie was fortunate to have the auditory experience to hear her brother after his demise and to learn and be able to get evidence of his presence through messages she could relate to others that could prove the material was coming from the source.
Many of the things he related offered me validation that I have come far on my quest for enlightenment and that my path has proven to be the one that has led me to my best use of soul purpose.
Thanks Annie! A great read and good for those others who need to know what Billy had to say. I am happy he can get to move on and hope I will be able to when it is my turn.
Many of the things he related offered me validation that I have come far on my quest for enlightenment and that my path has proven to be the one that has led me to my best use of soul purpose.
Thanks Annie! A great read and good for those others who need to know what Billy had to say. I am happy he can get to move on and hope I will be able to when it is my turn.
October 7, 2015
First book in nearly forever I wasn't able to finish. So boring and full of shit in my opinion, and I very strongly believe in the afterlife and communicating with past loved ones, but this book was ridiculous.
May 9, 2013
I received this book from the Goodreads giveaway books. I just finished reading it and usually after reading a book, I automatically write a review while it is still fresh in my mind. I took a little bit after finishing this book to think about what I had read. First I must say, it was a very easy read as I read it in one sitting. Second, I enjoy reading books like this because as humans, we are always curious about the afterlife and question if there is one, where do we go when we die, do we go directly to heaven, remain on a plane before going to heaven, etc., etc., etc.
I will say I know there will be many skeptics that will read this book and while reading it will say, "yeah right". They will pick this book apart, say that what is written is not possible because when we die we either go to heaven or hell and do not "communicate" with our loved ones left here on earth.
While reading this book, I always try to put myself in the authors shoes and try to feel what they are feeling (only for non-fiction stories). Whatever your religion is, you are raised believing one way because that is what was taught to you. Everyone has their own beliefs, and if they chose to believe that something like this can really happen, then they will. As a believer in the afterlife and also believing that people that have passed can communicate with us, many things in this book, I have read some of the same things and have had those same thoughts. In the book, Annie's brother communicated with her after a tragic death. They were never close as brother and sister and didn't always keep in touch. She had helped him several times to try and get him to beat his addiction to drugs. Maybe she had some guilt after his death because she had failed at helping him. But, from my experience of knowing people with addictions and working with them as well, they have to want to help themselves before anyone else can help them. Not everyone wants the help for whatever reasons. Anyways, after his death, she wakes one morning to his voice, talking to her and telling her to write down what he is telling her. She does so, not knowing entirely if it is real or not. As she does so, she keeps it to herself at first then shares with her writer's group about it and gives them proof that this is for real when he gives little messages for her to give to certain people. One of the things that Billy told her was that before we are born, we choose the kind of life we want to live. I have read this many times before. This also factors in the belief of reincarnation. Because we may chose one life-an easy one, no struggles, everything we want and then our next life, we may chose a hard one where everything is a struggle, we get by with the basic things we need in life but always wishing we had more so we didn't have to pinch pennies so much. I have always felt like that. He also mentioned about this "person" he referred to as Joseph and how he felt he had always known him and come to find out they were part of the same tribe from long ago. Many people could read into that a lot of things or just say it adds to the flare of the story. But when you stop and think about all the people you meet in your lifetime, some you feel a strong connection to, like you have known them all your life or if you believe in past lives, then maybe you knew that person in another lifetime. That by living many lives, we are learning things to put us on a higher plane when we die. When we feel that have learned all we need, then we are no longer reincarnated but remain on what level we decided to stop at.
I have read books where people have had near death experiences and have talked about the brilliant light, the family members there to meet us and the feeling of something greater. They also talk about how sad they are to return to earth and many become very angry because they didn't wish to return and will often later commit suicide. While others that come back, are happy live life to the fullest because they know that whatever they were to do here on earth is not done yet. From reading this story, it sounded as if Billy lived his life as he had chosen before being born, but to others, we couldn't understand how someone could want to live like that. And at the time of his death, he wasn't angry, scared, upset or anything. He was happy, for he was returning home, to a home that we forget that we come from when we chose to be born.
Some of the little things that he told her about that she couldn't possibly have known about, like her friend Tex and her drinking problem, the health issue with her ex husband, Steve, people would say after reading this, that is was just a coincidence that she "knew" about these things or call it lucky guessing. Many people that go on with their lives, when something happens, they just say, boy, was I lucky I left my house 10 minutes late because otherwise I may have been in that accident that happened, or they have a "feeling" about something. These people don't realize that all this comes from somewhere higher. Whether it be a guardian angel, a family member that has passed. We were given these delays or feelings for a reason because we were to receive them at that time.
Reading this book, I did have to wonder if maybe our different religions, backgrounds, cultures, upbringings, maybe how we "interpret" death is different. Scientists tell us we come from the stars, cosmic particles that when they collide, life formed. But we are taught from the Bible that God made us, no matter what religion we are. But, as a human race, we like scientific answers because we have a hard time believing in something we can't see. This is why I feel that some people are giving the "gift" to hear and see the ones that have passed on before us. Granite there are many fakes out there taking advantage of people, telling them what they want to hear, but there are also the real deals out there too. You don't need special powers or a gift to receive messages from the great beyond as we say. We receive messages every day if we would just open our minds to them. I myself have been able to see spirits since a child, but grew up with a mother that felt that was "evil" and was told not to harness that power even though she herself as that ability too. Even today, I still feel the presence and can often associate who it is by a scent or some other thing because it usually family members that visit me. I will dream about a person that has passed when I have questions about their death or want to know something.
I feel that Annie needed to write this book not only to get her brothers word out there, but also to maybe help someone else who maybe struggling with the loss of a loved one and will find some comfort by reading Billy's story. Everyone that reads this book, will have their own interpretation of what he is telling her, but if it brings some sort of peace to someone, then it will have helped.
I do not believe we are to know all the answers to the afterlife and what happens when we die. We are know what we know, no more, no less. People that go through life, not believing are truly missing out on living.
I will pass this book along to someone else who would like to know a little more about the afterlife and hope they have some more of their questions answered.
I believe Annie did the right thing by writing this book. I believe it was a comfort to her to write this and a way to feel closer to her brother and maybe right some the wrongs they had in their lives while growing up and even as adults. I truly believe her brother finally found the peace he was looking for during his lifetime. Hopefully she has found her peace too.
I will say I know there will be many skeptics that will read this book and while reading it will say, "yeah right". They will pick this book apart, say that what is written is not possible because when we die we either go to heaven or hell and do not "communicate" with our loved ones left here on earth.
While reading this book, I always try to put myself in the authors shoes and try to feel what they are feeling (only for non-fiction stories). Whatever your religion is, you are raised believing one way because that is what was taught to you. Everyone has their own beliefs, and if they chose to believe that something like this can really happen, then they will. As a believer in the afterlife and also believing that people that have passed can communicate with us, many things in this book, I have read some of the same things and have had those same thoughts. In the book, Annie's brother communicated with her after a tragic death. They were never close as brother and sister and didn't always keep in touch. She had helped him several times to try and get him to beat his addiction to drugs. Maybe she had some guilt after his death because she had failed at helping him. But, from my experience of knowing people with addictions and working with them as well, they have to want to help themselves before anyone else can help them. Not everyone wants the help for whatever reasons. Anyways, after his death, she wakes one morning to his voice, talking to her and telling her to write down what he is telling her. She does so, not knowing entirely if it is real or not. As she does so, she keeps it to herself at first then shares with her writer's group about it and gives them proof that this is for real when he gives little messages for her to give to certain people. One of the things that Billy told her was that before we are born, we choose the kind of life we want to live. I have read this many times before. This also factors in the belief of reincarnation. Because we may chose one life-an easy one, no struggles, everything we want and then our next life, we may chose a hard one where everything is a struggle, we get by with the basic things we need in life but always wishing we had more so we didn't have to pinch pennies so much. I have always felt like that. He also mentioned about this "person" he referred to as Joseph and how he felt he had always known him and come to find out they were part of the same tribe from long ago. Many people could read into that a lot of things or just say it adds to the flare of the story. But when you stop and think about all the people you meet in your lifetime, some you feel a strong connection to, like you have known them all your life or if you believe in past lives, then maybe you knew that person in another lifetime. That by living many lives, we are learning things to put us on a higher plane when we die. When we feel that have learned all we need, then we are no longer reincarnated but remain on what level we decided to stop at.
I have read books where people have had near death experiences and have talked about the brilliant light, the family members there to meet us and the feeling of something greater. They also talk about how sad they are to return to earth and many become very angry because they didn't wish to return and will often later commit suicide. While others that come back, are happy live life to the fullest because they know that whatever they were to do here on earth is not done yet. From reading this story, it sounded as if Billy lived his life as he had chosen before being born, but to others, we couldn't understand how someone could want to live like that. And at the time of his death, he wasn't angry, scared, upset or anything. He was happy, for he was returning home, to a home that we forget that we come from when we chose to be born.
Some of the little things that he told her about that she couldn't possibly have known about, like her friend Tex and her drinking problem, the health issue with her ex husband, Steve, people would say after reading this, that is was just a coincidence that she "knew" about these things or call it lucky guessing. Many people that go on with their lives, when something happens, they just say, boy, was I lucky I left my house 10 minutes late because otherwise I may have been in that accident that happened, or they have a "feeling" about something. These people don't realize that all this comes from somewhere higher. Whether it be a guardian angel, a family member that has passed. We were given these delays or feelings for a reason because we were to receive them at that time.
Reading this book, I did have to wonder if maybe our different religions, backgrounds, cultures, upbringings, maybe how we "interpret" death is different. Scientists tell us we come from the stars, cosmic particles that when they collide, life formed. But we are taught from the Bible that God made us, no matter what religion we are. But, as a human race, we like scientific answers because we have a hard time believing in something we can't see. This is why I feel that some people are giving the "gift" to hear and see the ones that have passed on before us. Granite there are many fakes out there taking advantage of people, telling them what they want to hear, but there are also the real deals out there too. You don't need special powers or a gift to receive messages from the great beyond as we say. We receive messages every day if we would just open our minds to them. I myself have been able to see spirits since a child, but grew up with a mother that felt that was "evil" and was told not to harness that power even though she herself as that ability too. Even today, I still feel the presence and can often associate who it is by a scent or some other thing because it usually family members that visit me. I will dream about a person that has passed when I have questions about their death or want to know something.
I feel that Annie needed to write this book not only to get her brothers word out there, but also to maybe help someone else who maybe struggling with the loss of a loved one and will find some comfort by reading Billy's story. Everyone that reads this book, will have their own interpretation of what he is telling her, but if it brings some sort of peace to someone, then it will have helped.
I do not believe we are to know all the answers to the afterlife and what happens when we die. We are know what we know, no more, no less. People that go through life, not believing are truly missing out on living.
I will pass this book along to someone else who would like to know a little more about the afterlife and hope they have some more of their questions answered.
I believe Annie did the right thing by writing this book. I believe it was a comfort to her to write this and a way to feel closer to her brother and maybe right some the wrongs they had in their lives while growing up and even as adults. I truly believe her brother finally found the peace he was looking for during his lifetime. Hopefully she has found her peace too.
March 13, 2014
I heard about this book on Facebook and was intrigued by the synopsis. Despite being in the middle of several other books (yes rarely read one book at a time!) I purchased this and found I could not put it down, so I read it in a few days. I was very moved by the story and contacted the author on Facebook. I was pleasantly surprised to get a speedy response from a very lovely person that seemed very in tune with the world.
I rated this five stars because it is well worth the read and will leave you pondering long after you have finished reading it. Yes I'm still pondering!
I have read the reviews for this book and while most of them are good, there are some that criticise, saying it's too hard to believe and the thoughts of someone sitting in the clouds looking down is ridiculous. What I would say to these people is that they are taking it too literally, and looking at it from the viewpoint of where they are now. I dare say Annie seen her brother that way, but it didn't actually mean he was physically sitting in a cloud like a genie. I take it to mean that it's how she interpreted it, just as psychics are shown things and given messages, it doesn't mean it in a literal sense, it's how it was shown to them. People need to stop thinking as they are and think with the mindset that anything is possible. Maybe not in our physical narrow minded earth view, but in the broader sense as we are when we pass on. I feel we are very much blinkered in this life and it's only when we open our minds and our perspectives that we experience much more.
I have recently written my own paranormal book, 'Paranormal Intruder' and while my experiences were frightening and much more literal - chairs physically moving, knives being thrown - I also encountered some positive spiritual experiences, some too difficult or personal to put into words. I commend Annie Kagan for being brave enough to come out to the world with her story. I know it is not easy, but I am happy to see she appears to have a lot of support. I would recommend this to anyone interested in the afterlife, spiritual people, or those with a very open mind. Personally, I believe when we pass on we are initially treated in line with our own spiritual beliefs, so no two experiences may be the same. Having said that, most of the books I have read all have a common theme of love, energy and a positive presence, which is very comforting indeed. This book is well written, and I will no doubt read it again.
I rated this five stars because it is well worth the read and will leave you pondering long after you have finished reading it. Yes I'm still pondering!
I have read the reviews for this book and while most of them are good, there are some that criticise, saying it's too hard to believe and the thoughts of someone sitting in the clouds looking down is ridiculous. What I would say to these people is that they are taking it too literally, and looking at it from the viewpoint of where they are now. I dare say Annie seen her brother that way, but it didn't actually mean he was physically sitting in a cloud like a genie. I take it to mean that it's how she interpreted it, just as psychics are shown things and given messages, it doesn't mean it in a literal sense, it's how it was shown to them. People need to stop thinking as they are and think with the mindset that anything is possible. Maybe not in our physical narrow minded earth view, but in the broader sense as we are when we pass on. I feel we are very much blinkered in this life and it's only when we open our minds and our perspectives that we experience much more.
I have recently written my own paranormal book, 'Paranormal Intruder' and while my experiences were frightening and much more literal - chairs physically moving, knives being thrown - I also encountered some positive spiritual experiences, some too difficult or personal to put into words. I commend Annie Kagan for being brave enough to come out to the world with her story. I know it is not easy, but I am happy to see she appears to have a lot of support. I would recommend this to anyone interested in the afterlife, spiritual people, or those with a very open mind. Personally, I believe when we pass on we are initially treated in line with our own spiritual beliefs, so no two experiences may be the same. Having said that, most of the books I have read all have a common theme of love, energy and a positive presence, which is very comforting indeed. This book is well written, and I will no doubt read it again.
July 29, 2013
This was the most far fetched storyline I have ever read. I stopped at only 50 pages into this book. I am the biggest believer in the Afterlife, but this book was a major disappointment.
June 17, 2014
This book was very interesting but sad. I recently lost my dad and have been reading a lot of books on the afterlife. This book made me feel very unsettled regarding where my dad may be now. It made me very sad to think that we forget the people we loved on earth and wonder more now what is the meaning of life. According to this there almost seems to be no purpose of life and we forget everything and everyone we loved and die and go virtually no where. At least that is what I got from this book. If my dad, who also died from addiction, went through anything like what billy did, it makes me very sad to think that. It sounds very lonely in the afterlife according to this book. Billy never saw his family or loved ones in his afterlife experience. I dont get that. He also never saw a god of any kind. I think if you are greiving as I am, this might not be the best book to read right away.
Read
December 8, 2025As I was reading I started to receive signs of my own. I too lost someone close to me who struggled with addiction. Like Annie I fought so hard to save him when he couldn't be saved. At first I thought the book was too over the top for me, even though I have gotten visits before, these entire and persistent conversations seemed too good to be true. After reading the first several chapters I said out loud, "This book is bullshit. Zach (my friend that passed) if this is for real give me a sign right now". For whatever reason I decided to continue reading even though I was skeptical and wasn't yet connecting with the book. The very next words I read were about how Billy couldn't be saved and that Annie shouldn't worry about what everyone thought about her, being an enabler, stupid, etc. when it came to her trying to save him. These were the exact thoughts/emotions I had struggled with since my own loss. It was the sign I needed to continue reading and start believing.
Since I can remember I have suffered from an over whelming fear of death which manifests in severe panic attacks. I don't know that this book will have cured me of that but it makes me believe there is something else out there to look forward to. I recommend anyone who is grieving a loved one and wondering where they are read this book. Even if you don't necessarily believe, like Billy says, at least it will open your mind to the possibility.
Since I can remember I have suffered from an over whelming fear of death which manifests in severe panic attacks. I don't know that this book will have cured me of that but it makes me believe there is something else out there to look forward to. I recommend anyone who is grieving a loved one and wondering where they are read this book. Even if you don't necessarily believe, like Billy says, at least it will open your mind to the possibility.
October 2, 2013
This book is the first of it's type I've ever read, the afterlife was something as a Christian, I believed to be something completely different. This is the story of how Annie Kagan, a successful New York married professional realizes she couldn't do it anymore. After leaving the hustle & bustle of the city to start a different life, she is confronted with the devastating news of her brother. The book tells of their unusual relationship, two people could hardly be more different. Soon after receiving that awful news, Annie is contacted by her bad- but lovable brother much to her astonishment. He instructs her to get this notebook that he had given her, and proceeded to take her on the ride of her life. The bad boy brother who was forever being bailed out by his "good girl" sister found himself the teacher and her the student for possibly the first time in her memory. This book truly gave me a "Spiritual Awakening" as it had for many others I'm told. Things we were taught to accept without questioning and never really ask are turned on their head. Sometimes things we accept as "black & white" couldn't be further from the truth. I would recommend this to anyone who has ever questioned an afterlife, most notably what we are taught in church, mosque, or in any kind of religion, or lack thereof, and especially for someone who has lost someone & fears the end to truly be final. . .
April 9, 2014
I love books about the Afterlife! I read this in one sitting, it's a pretty easy read.
I almost gave it a 4 star rating.....I was totally engrossed in the book until the end. It was a bit difficult to get the point....not sure what he was describing and where he was going in the end. I guess I was expecting more, I left the book feeling lonely and a little sad, although parts of the book were gave you some comfort.....I was left wondering why he could continue memories of his sister, when he spoke of memories all going away......
I have to add, when I finished the book, I opened my Facebook and the first post I saw from a friend started with,
"By the Grace of God......"
Wow, no kidding.....
I almost gave it a 4 star rating.....I was totally engrossed in the book until the end. It was a bit difficult to get the point....not sure what he was describing and where he was going in the end. I guess I was expecting more, I left the book feeling lonely and a little sad, although parts of the book were gave you some comfort.....I was left wondering why he could continue memories of his sister, when he spoke of memories all going away......
I have to add, when I finished the book, I opened my Facebook and the first post I saw from a friend started with,
"By the Grace of God......"
Wow, no kidding.....
July 1, 2013
This book started out making me feel deliciously at peace. As it went on I became a little less at peace because Billie's description of the afterlife isn't what I have imagined. But then again I have never been there.
February 15, 2014
I was so disappointed in this book. I read it with an open mind, but it seemed to me, that Annie was using her own words, her own thoughts about Billy's death. She represents him speaking so eloquently that I found it hard to believe. Seems her beliefs are depicted throughout the book, and maybe she wants so badly to believe that Billy is speaking with her, that this is what her mind comes up with. When she mentions that she takes the powerful drug, Valium, that was enough said for me. I know what Valium can do to the mind, I have taken in my past and I, too, had dreams of my dead father and my dead cousin and they were creepy experiences for me. When I got off of the Valium, no more creepy dreams for me and no more dreams of the dead for me. I am a Buddhist now, and so I enjoyed the Hindu deities, but seemed way far fetched for me when she spoke about it in length. I got a chuckle out of Lynnette's review when she said.........She got off the Bus, hehe. I got off the bus, too. My husband said he got off the bus before it ran off the road. Hehe. I wished I would have spent my money on a good Thich Nhat Hanh book or the Dalai Lama, but you live and you learn.
Julie Jones
Julie Jones
March 31, 2015
This is a great read.If it sows any seeds in the readers mind, about the fact that there is no such thing as death,(as we know it) then this delightful book has done its job. This gem allows us to open up to the fact whether we are physical or non physical, communication is at our finger tips with those we love and care for. All we need do is raise our vibration by choosing meditative silence to enable those no longer in a body to communicate. Loved this book and intend to buy another copy to lend out!
March 23, 2013
I surprised myself by really enjoying this.
August 3, 2015
I believe many people may consider this e fictional, rather than a real, description. There is a Spanish saying: "Yo no creo en brujas, pero que las hay, las hay!" ("I do not believe in Witches, but that they exist, they do!")a funny saying that I always interpreted as meaning: often, we ignore what is the truth, but there is so much under our noses which reveals itself to our astonishment, why not keep an open mind?
Annie's book touched me. The way in which she describes her relationship with her brother and mostly, the way in which his words resonate creating an inner universe of musical beauty, had an impact on me irrespectively of it being a "truth truth" or a poetic truth...
I especially loved the musical links to different composers whom I agree seem to be touched by Heavenly grave in their music scores...
I felt this book as a perfect, circular tale that fills the Reader with light.
Maria Carmo,
Lisbon 3 August 2015.
Annie's book touched me. The way in which she describes her relationship with her brother and mostly, the way in which his words resonate creating an inner universe of musical beauty, had an impact on me irrespectively of it being a "truth truth" or a poetic truth...
I especially loved the musical links to different composers whom I agree seem to be touched by Heavenly grave in their music scores...
I felt this book as a perfect, circular tale that fills the Reader with light.
Maria Carmo,
Lisbon 3 August 2015.
November 22, 2023
This is bad fiction that was successfully marketed as (divinely inspired) nonfiction. Billy is personality-free in both life and death, and he constantly refers to his sister as “darling” and “princess,” like they’re lovers in a cheesy 1950s pulp. I finished it close to retching.
March 13, 2013
I loved this book! It was intriguing & wild.
May 25, 2025
Apart from the contention behind the truth of this story, I actually just thought it wasn’t well written, which was surprising given that she essentially pivoted her whole life to become an author. Kind of sounds like a beginner’s writing workshop project..? Sorry to be a hater :( hope the afterlife is actually that chill though
February 2, 2017
While I find the subject very interesting, this particular elaboration of it makes me angry. I usually like reading and hearing different theories about the existance of afterlife and various interpretations of it, just to test or even expand my own beliefs and contemplate the possibilities. Most of all, I'm curious about other opinions, and not only on this subject, but so many more. That's why I read these kind of books from time to time.
A novel about Billy would be fine. Great, even. Novel, as in ''a fictitious prose narrative of considerable length and complexity, portraying characters and usually presenting a sequential organization of action and scenes''.
This... I am sorry for the author, but this was just not good. I do know the feeling of loosing a family member and I do understand that each one of us has a different way of dealing with all that enormous pain. Writing about it is a great idea, I think. It helps. On that part, it is easy to understand this mess of a book. Sadly, understanding where it came from doesn't make it any better.
I don't want to be mean, but I have a feeling that author just used her brother's death to send her own messages to the world. I will not even comment the profit. Because, while I do have an open mind, to me it is crystal clear that in this case the author actually spoke to herself all the time. Not hard to understand actually. What I find wrong about it, is her putting her own words into the mouth of a ghost and publishing them as the truth for all mankind. Again, novel about Billy would be a much better solution than this. Non fiction, really?
It feels like she wasn't confident enough to write a book on her own, so she used the sad circumstances as an excuse. With her brother talking to her, she had to write it. Even the Beings from the afterlife agreed on it. Hmmm... Convenient.
The ''proofs'' she gave us were no proofs at all. Some of his ''messages'' sounded as they came straight from the fortune cookies. And for an addict and troubled person with not much of an education, Billy was impressively eloquent while describing his experience. For the most part of it, his story was boring. And his Goddess and so many other details from his afterlife sounded like they came from Indian books and even astral projection experiences we can easily find on the Internet. None of it was convincing.
I am sorry for her loss, but I can't say it was good when it actully was anything but.
A novel about Billy would be fine. Great, even. Novel, as in ''a fictitious prose narrative of considerable length and complexity, portraying characters and usually presenting a sequential organization of action and scenes''.
This... I am sorry for the author, but this was just not good. I do know the feeling of loosing a family member and I do understand that each one of us has a different way of dealing with all that enormous pain. Writing about it is a great idea, I think. It helps. On that part, it is easy to understand this mess of a book. Sadly, understanding where it came from doesn't make it any better.
I don't want to be mean, but I have a feeling that author just used her brother's death to send her own messages to the world. I will not even comment the profit. Because, while I do have an open mind, to me it is crystal clear that in this case the author actually spoke to herself all the time. Not hard to understand actually. What I find wrong about it, is her putting her own words into the mouth of a ghost and publishing them as the truth for all mankind. Again, novel about Billy would be a much better solution than this. Non fiction, really?
It feels like she wasn't confident enough to write a book on her own, so she used the sad circumstances as an excuse. With her brother talking to her, she had to write it. Even the Beings from the afterlife agreed on it. Hmmm... Convenient.
The ''proofs'' she gave us were no proofs at all. Some of his ''messages'' sounded as they came straight from the fortune cookies. And for an addict and troubled person with not much of an education, Billy was impressively eloquent while describing his experience. For the most part of it, his story was boring. And his Goddess and so many other details from his afterlife sounded like they came from Indian books and even astral projection experiences we can easily find on the Internet. None of it was convincing.
I am sorry for her loss, but I can't say it was good when it actully was anything but.
September 18, 2017
FAKE FAKE FAKE
DO NOT READ THIS STUPID FAKE BOOK
Хора, това е една от най-глуповатите книги EVER! Бих оправдал търсенето й - заради анотацията, в която става въпрос за разговори с мъртвец, но са ми много интересни мненията на хората, след като я дочетат....
Първите 60-70 страници четох горе долу с интерес... 62-годишният Били, хероинов наркоман, лежал 25 години по затворите, умира, блъснат от кола... Сестра му, авторката, която пише песни, медитира и е тотално куку, осъзнавам го в последствие, през целия си живот в била обсебена от глупостите, които прави брат й - тя е по-малка от него. Дни след смъртта му, той започва да й говори отгоре! И това започва всичкото, което мога да обобщя само с FAKE в тази "книга". Били разказва за живота горе - клише до клише: как всички са само дух, няма материя, всичко се рее, има само доброта, как на Земята надпреварата кой е по-по-най е причина за всички страдания, учения и клишета от глупости как сме виновни са съдбата си сами, как да обичаме ближния си докато сме живи, да не се страхуваме от смъртта и още десетки глупостиииии - да не плачем за умрелите, защото те ни гледат и страдат, нямало смисъл от сълзи, за прошката, греховете, да се откажем от материалното, колко хубаво било на оня свят, защото Били не се тревожел как изглежда "Тук просто изглеждам като себе си и това е страхотно! Просто сияя, което не е свързано с никакви усилия" ох божееееееее
Моля ви, не четете тази книга!
DO NOT READ THIS STUPID FAKE BOOK
Хора, това е една от най-глуповатите книги EVER! Бих оправдал търсенето й - заради анотацията, в която става въпрос за разговори с мъртвец, но са ми много интересни мненията на хората, след като я дочетат....
Първите 60-70 страници четох горе долу с интерес... 62-годишният Били, хероинов наркоман, лежал 25 години по затворите, умира, блъснат от кола... Сестра му, авторката, която пише песни, медитира и е тотално куку, осъзнавам го в последствие, през целия си живот в била обсебена от глупостите, които прави брат й - тя е по-малка от него. Дни след смъртта му, той започва да й говори отгоре! И това започва всичкото, което мога да обобщя само с FAKE в тази "книга". Били разказва за живота горе - клише до клише: как всички са само дух, няма материя, всичко се рее, има само доброта, как на Земята надпреварата кой е по-по-най е причина за всички страдания, учения и клишета от глупости как сме виновни са съдбата си сами, как да обичаме ближния си докато сме живи, да не се страхуваме от смъртта и още десетки глупостиииии - да не плачем за умрелите, защото те ни гледат и страдат, нямало смисъл от сълзи, за прошката, греховете, да се откажем от материалното, колко хубаво било на оня свят, защото Били не се тревожел как изглежда "Тук просто изглеждам като себе си и това е страхотно! Просто сияя, което не е свързано с никакви усилия" ох божееееееее
Моля ви, не четете тази книга!
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