How to Be an Assertive (Not Aggressive) Woman: In Life, In Love, and On the Job

by Jean Baer

Are you a portrait of a "lady"--or are you a person? * Are you too embarrassed to tell your lover what you really want in bed?* Are you self-conscious about going to a party alone?* Are you sitting in the same job for years, doing excellent work, but receiving only limited raises and no promotions?* Are you unable to ask for a better table in a restaurant when you've been placed next to the kitchen?* Are you allowing your husband, lover, or child to take advantage of you?Learn how to express your opinions and wishes, and stand up for your rights with these revolutionary new techniques of assertiveness training.

Genres: Self Help, Nonfiction, Psychology, Personal Development, How To

Mass Market Paperback

First published October 1, 1976

Reviews

[Kathryn · Rating 3 out of 5]

this book was a lot of work. kind of made me feel bad about myself and how unassertive i really am in the beginning. i didn't read all of the chapters because i began to get overwhelmed with how much work i had to do on myself! i think i'll pick it up again and do a chapter at a time. the quizzes and homework assignments provide for a lot of self analysis and introspection...its deep man

[Kat · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book is a bit dated but it definitely has a number of interesting concepts and ideas that are still relevant today. It's handy to see a book on assertiveness that isn't designed for managers, leaders or the workplace too. Assertiveness is an important skill for all, particularly women!

[Deirdre · Rating 4 out of 5]

You know what's depressing about this book? That so much of it is still relevant and how some of her assumptions of change never happened...

[Rawan · Rating 5 out of 5]

I am so surprised this book is not more popular!

This is an eye opening book, on so many behaviors that are hunting and damaging our relationship with people and ourselves to say the least!

The author once describes assertiveness as:
“Assertiveness is making your own choices, standing up for yourself appropriately, and being proactive, you stand for your rights without violating others rights”

This will help you become more self aware, more mature in your relationships, more confident, and it will totally make sense for you to express yourself and your needs, because this is how we are supposed to live.

Another quote of this book:
“According to psychologist Andrew Salter, "There are some women whose life is one of chronic indirectness. Indirectness is based on fear. Sometimes you have to be indirect when dealing with someone in a power position, but it's an empty situation when your survival is always based on indirectness."

[Rafa · Rating 5 out of 5]

To be honest, it’s the wake-up call you need. Found it perchance in my grandmother’s library. Do not regret reading it. A real eye-opener, brimming with useful tips. Written by a woman who formerly struggled with assertiveness herself (married then to a psychologist) and paints a realistic picture. Well-researched and exposed.

[Ier · Rating 4 out of 5]

Some parts are still relevant today; others are not. The first part was already calling me out, and I'm not used to books doing that.

[Denise]

Recommended by therapist Laura Weschler.