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Letting Go of the Reins: The True Story of a Man Who Left the Amish and the Woman Who Helped Him
After Bill Herschberger made the difficult decision to leave the Amish, the response from his community was immediate and relentless. Bill was a church member with a wife and child. It was imperative that his soul be saved from hell. If he didn't return, Bill knew that he would be shunned and excommunicated. But what he hadn’t expected, and what he struggled to accept, was discovering the deception and deceit perpetuated by the Amish for generations.
LETTING GO OF THE REINS offers a glimpse into the reclusive Amish as told from from the point of view of both Bill and his friend and co-worker, Karrie, as well as the unprecedented voice of the Amish themselves.
LETTING GO OF THE REINS offers a glimpse into the reclusive Amish as told from from the point of view of both Bill and his friend and co-worker, Karrie, as well as the unprecedented voice of the Amish themselves.
250 pages, Paperback
First published May 30, 2013
About the author
Vicki Botner
2 books8 followersVicki Botner can trace her roots back four generations in the central Wisconsin town of Coloma where she grew up. She attended the University of Wisconsin-Stevens Point, graduating with a Bachelor's degree in English, then earned a Master of Arts degree in Library and Information Studies at the University of Wisconsin-Madison and worked several years as an academic reference librarian.
She has lived in the Finger Lakes area of New York, and both Dallas and Austin, Texas. Vicki currently lives in Little Rock, Arkansas, with her husband, son, and two large dogs.
She has lived in the Finger Lakes area of New York, and both Dallas and Austin, Texas. Vicki currently lives in Little Rock, Arkansas, with her husband, son, and two large dogs.
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Displaying 1 - 23 of 23 reviews
June 13, 2013
Letting Go of the Reins is an eye-opening story told in the unvarnished two person narrative of Bill and Karrie. I think we all believe that we know about the Amish (a simple culture within our modern culture), but it turns out I had no idea what really goes on within an Amish community. The book includes actual letters from the Amish to Bill and I learned a lot about Amish culture and people from this book.
Set in rural Wisconsin, the writing combines beautiful imagery with honest dialogue; each chapter told from a singular view point. The author alternates Bill and Karrie’s perspectives within the storyline to keep you turning the page. Revealing events from both of their pasts lend perspective to their actions. Although they are very different people, when Bill decides to leave the Amish and Karrie offers him help, it brings them together in a way I’m sure they never expected. I found myself rooting for them to prevail.
Set in rural Wisconsin, the writing combines beautiful imagery with honest dialogue; each chapter told from a singular view point. The author alternates Bill and Karrie’s perspectives within the storyline to keep you turning the page. Revealing events from both of their pasts lend perspective to their actions. Although they are very different people, when Bill decides to leave the Amish and Karrie offers him help, it brings them together in a way I’m sure they never expected. I found myself rooting for them to prevail.
July 8, 2021
Letting Go of the Reins: The true story of a man who left the Amish and the woman who helped him by Vicki Botner.
“I left,” Bill said to Karrie. “Left what?” she inquired. “The Amish,”he answered simply. Leaving was difficult, especially since he had a wife and child. Leaving meant being shunned and ex-communicated from family and friends. It would mean leaving everything he had ever known into a world he was intentionally kept apart from and then trying to adapt to this new world. I have mixed feelings about this book and it is not for everyone because of colorful language and the topic it presents. The true story is told in a two-person perspective, Karrie, the Englisch woman and Bill, the Amish man. It is filled with actual letters written by the Amish family and friends trying to persuade Bill to return. A story different from the more inviting Amish books I have read.
“I left,” Bill said to Karrie. “Left what?” she inquired. “The Amish,”he answered simply. Leaving was difficult, especially since he had a wife and child. Leaving meant being shunned and ex-communicated from family and friends. It would mean leaving everything he had ever known into a world he was intentionally kept apart from and then trying to adapt to this new world. I have mixed feelings about this book and it is not for everyone because of colorful language and the topic it presents. The true story is told in a two-person perspective, Karrie, the Englisch woman and Bill, the Amish man. It is filled with actual letters written by the Amish family and friends trying to persuade Bill to return. A story different from the more inviting Amish books I have read.
June 23, 2013
I got this book free through Goodreads First Reads.
This book tells the true story of how a man leaves the Amish with the help of a non-Amish woman. It would seem reasonable to expect that it would be easy to change your lifestyle, and that your friends and family would be supportive. But then I knew little of the Amish before reading this book. I would say that their lifestyle sounds quite good in parts. Wouldn't we all want to live a simpler, more spiritual life? But imagine if that lifestyle is forced upon you. And if you want to leave, your friends and family will go to great lengths to get you back. Not looking so pretty now, is it?
The book is written from both Bill's and Karrie's points of view, which gives it a balanced feeling. There are also countless letters from Bill's family and the wider Amish community which illustrate their feelings towards him and his departure. It's so sad how his family is torn apart simply because he doesn't want to continue following their customs and rules.
This book makes you realise how important it is to be able to live your life your own way. And how sad it is that many people in the world do not have that freedom.
This book tells the true story of how a man leaves the Amish with the help of a non-Amish woman. It would seem reasonable to expect that it would be easy to change your lifestyle, and that your friends and family would be supportive. But then I knew little of the Amish before reading this book. I would say that their lifestyle sounds quite good in parts. Wouldn't we all want to live a simpler, more spiritual life? But imagine if that lifestyle is forced upon you. And if you want to leave, your friends and family will go to great lengths to get you back. Not looking so pretty now, is it?
The book is written from both Bill's and Karrie's points of view, which gives it a balanced feeling. There are also countless letters from Bill's family and the wider Amish community which illustrate their feelings towards him and his departure. It's so sad how his family is torn apart simply because he doesn't want to continue following their customs and rules.
This book makes you realise how important it is to be able to live your life your own way. And how sad it is that many people in the world do not have that freedom.
July 12, 2013
This is a revealing book about the Amish in a small town area, and what happens to one who leaves that life. It is written in a straight-forward style from the points of view of both main characters, Bill and Karrie. It is well-written and a story worth telling. I enjoyed it immensely.
August 14, 2015
A stirring, powerful account about following your dreams, doing what is right, by following your authentic path. A transition, even though hard, leads to a better life--where you are able to be your true self. Vicki Botner wrote a beautiful, poetic, but also haunting account of what it is to be Amish, and what it is like to leave that life. With wonderful imagery such as, "the crushing weight of that oak seemed to be lifted from my body... and "our boots crunching over the frozen pine needles and ice-coated leaves...", reading this book was a visual and literary experience.
June 24, 2013
I wasn't sure about reading a book about the Amish at first, but I found it hard to put down. It left me wondering about the future of his children and himself--I would love to see a followup to the story in a few years.
September 16, 2014
An insightful look into the secretive world of the Amish as told by a man who made the difficult decision to leave and the woman who befriended and helped him. "The Amish are no better or worse than the rest of us. The problem with the Amish is that the victims have no where to go for help."
June 15, 2013
Awesome book!!! One of those you just don't want to put down!
April 2, 2021
Don't waste your time on this!
This book attempts to destroy the Amish and puts them in the worst light.They are not all the same and I know that from my experience with them.I worked for someone who left to become English. He was a great guy and often visited his Mom. I also had friends that we visited often.None of them even came close to the people discribed in this book.one of the main characters in this book goes on and on with her hate filled thoughts on them.very negative and I feel exaggerated. I begin to skim part way through and didn't read every page. Don't waste your time. Trashy.
This book attempts to destroy the Amish and puts them in the worst light.They are not all the same and I know that from my experience with them.I worked for someone who left to become English. He was a great guy and often visited his Mom. I also had friends that we visited often.None of them even came close to the people discribed in this book.one of the main characters in this book goes on and on with her hate filled thoughts on them.very negative and I feel exaggerated. I begin to skim part way through and didn't read every page. Don't waste your time. Trashy.
October 31, 2023
Telling The Truth!
I, like many others, have had a distorted view of what life in an Amish community is really like. Of course, we only see the outside. My thanks to Karrie and Bill for telling their story. This is the second book I've read this week regarding what goes on in an Amish community. The other one dealt with sexual abuse in all forms. What makes it, the abuse, even sadder in a closed community like this is that the women have no one to turn to and few ways to get out of their horrible situation. That needs to change!
I, like many others, have had a distorted view of what life in an Amish community is really like. Of course, we only see the outside. My thanks to Karrie and Bill for telling their story. This is the second book I've read this week regarding what goes on in an Amish community. The other one dealt with sexual abuse in all forms. What makes it, the abuse, even sadder in a closed community like this is that the women have no one to turn to and few ways to get out of their horrible situation. That needs to change!
October 18, 2022
Karrie's Reins
Poor Bill!, he exchanged his Amish reins for Karrie's reins. The Amish are not perfect, but neither are the English. Karrie does not miss an opportunity to bash the Amish, her step children are still Amish! Respect that. The dislike she has for Ruby is blinding her.
I literally forced myself to finish reading this book. Not worth the read. Did not like all the letters, which I did not find contributed to the book.
Poor Bill!, he exchanged his Amish reins for Karrie's reins. The Amish are not perfect, but neither are the English. Karrie does not miss an opportunity to bash the Amish, her step children are still Amish! Respect that. The dislike she has for Ruby is blinding her.
I literally forced myself to finish reading this book. Not worth the read. Did not like all the letters, which I did not find contributed to the book.
February 1, 2022
Don't bother...
This was a long snarky, poorly written rant against the Amish. The storyline gets lost in the endless letters and silly boasting about the toughness of the main female character. It was hard to stick it out. I finished it hoping at least it would finish strong...it did not. Skip this one.
This was a long snarky, poorly written rant against the Amish. The storyline gets lost in the endless letters and silly boasting about the toughness of the main female character. It was hard to stick it out. I finished it hoping at least it would finish strong...it did not. Skip this one.
December 8, 2021
Review
I really liked the book. My only problem with it were the s words and a few other words. The story was captivating. I'm so glad that Bill was able to escape this disgusting cult. What a happy ending!
I really liked the book. My only problem with it were the s words and a few other words. The story was captivating. I'm so glad that Bill was able to escape this disgusting cult. What a happy ending!
June 26, 2017
A look into the real side of the Amish!
July 5, 2017
Interesting story
This book tells about the truths of the Amish. Quick read! A lot of interesting letters that were sent by the Amish, made the story very real!!
This book tells about the truths of the Amish. Quick read! A lot of interesting letters that were sent by the Amish, made the story very real!!
October 7, 2019
Insightful. People are not what they seem on the surface.
May 8, 2020
It was average
I liked the story but I found that the book filled with too many letters from family. I would have like to hear more about how they are living after the fact.
I liked the story but I found that the book filled with too many letters from family. I would have like to hear more about how they are living after the fact.
May 14, 2021
Good story, good information
April 18, 2026
very very good book
August 24, 2026
A life of deceit
I will probably always have a vision of this book in my head when visiting Amish roadside stands and wonder what secrets lie in those homes
I will probably always have a vision of this book in my head when visiting Amish roadside stands and wonder what secrets lie in those homes
July 19, 2015
I read this book purely for research needed for writing the sequel to The Bond Woman: An Amish Woman's Love for a Man on the Outside. It was very informative but there was little to be admired about the "style" of writing. It read like a report, which was okay for my purposes.
June 15, 2013
This book is such an easy read that it only took me eight hours! I'm ready for the follow up book.
July 8, 2013
Wow. This exposes the seedy underbelly of the Amish in a whole new light.
Displaying 1 - 23 of 23 reviews