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Finding Grace: A True Story About Losing Your Way In Life...And Finding It Again
Finding Grace is the powerful, often humorous, and deeply moving story of one woman's journey of broken dreams. It is the story of how a painful legacy of the past is confronted and met with peace. This book is for anyone who has struggled to understand why our desires- even the simplest ones-are sometimes denied or who has questioned where God is when we need him most. This story is about one woman's unlikely road to motherhood. Finally, it's a book about the "undeserved gift which is life itself." It's the story of "Finding Grace."
Donna VanLiere has entertained millions with her inspirational stories. In her new book, she gives us a candid look into her own life, a life filled with suffering and pain, but one that ultimately finds peace with itself.
Donna VanLiere has entertained millions with her inspirational stories. In her new book, she gives us a candid look into her own life, a life filled with suffering and pain, but one that ultimately finds peace with itself.
228 pages, Paperback
First published March 31, 2009
17 people are currently reading
517 people want to read
About the author
Donna VanLiere
78 books1,338 followersDonna is a New York Times and USA Today best-selling author. She's an in-demand conference speaker and gifted teacher and has 14 published books including four that have been adapted into movies.
Donna is the recipient of multiple industry awards including a Retailer's Choice Award for Fiction, a Dove Award, a Silver Angel Award, two Audie Awards for best inspirational fiction, a nominee for a Gold Medallion Book of the Year and is an inductee in the Ohio Foundation of Independent Colleges Hall of Excellence joining such luminaries as Coretta Scott King, Hugh Downs, Dr. Norman Vincent Peale and Senator John Glenn.
Learn more about Donna by visiting www.DonnaVanLiere.com and stay up-to-date and in-touch by subscribing to her free Friendship List.
Donna is the recipient of multiple industry awards including a Retailer's Choice Award for Fiction, a Dove Award, a Silver Angel Award, two Audie Awards for best inspirational fiction, a nominee for a Gold Medallion Book of the Year and is an inductee in the Ohio Foundation of Independent Colleges Hall of Excellence joining such luminaries as Coretta Scott King, Hugh Downs, Dr. Norman Vincent Peale and Senator John Glenn.
Learn more about Donna by visiting www.DonnaVanLiere.com and stay up-to-date and in-touch by subscribing to her free Friendship List.
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 88 reviews
September 9, 2009
The story here is nothing new: the author writes about her struggle with infertility and her journey towards adoption. What IS new is the beautiful, heartfelt writing. I was moved many times in the book.
There were some loose ends and not everything was brought to a clear conclusion. I found her inclusion of the story of being molested as a child (tastefully done, with no graphic details) important to understanding her, and she returned to it often, but it wasn't really ever resolved for me -- but since this is a memoir, that seems true to life.
I don't think I've ever read a more moving passage about adoption than this one:
"Many women in China approach adoptive parents and say, 'Lucky baby. Lucky baby." I had heard it in the halls as some of the babies were being delivered and Troy and I talked about it as we watched Gracie sleep. To me, 'lucky' has connotations of magic, sparkling lephrechauns, a wink, and rolling dice. 'Luck didn't have anything to do with it,' I said, whispering to her. She was a gift. We had held out our arms for years; we had held them out till they ached and our bodies shook under the strain. Perhaps that is when a gift is most valued and loved. God is excessive, even reckless, when it comes to grace but it is never wasted and I wonder how often it is acknowledged."
In an earlier passage, as she writes about her "Desert Years," she writes this:
"People who don't believe in God expect nothing of him so are presumably never upset or disappointed with him but for those of us who see his hand on this world in the oceans and stars and in the faces of our neighbors, we expect something, anything, that whispers to us that there is some sort of road map for our life. All of these expectations languish during the desert years."
There were some loose ends and not everything was brought to a clear conclusion. I found her inclusion of the story of being molested as a child (tastefully done, with no graphic details) important to understanding her, and she returned to it often, but it wasn't really ever resolved for me -- but since this is a memoir, that seems true to life.
I don't think I've ever read a more moving passage about adoption than this one:
"Many women in China approach adoptive parents and say, 'Lucky baby. Lucky baby." I had heard it in the halls as some of the babies were being delivered and Troy and I talked about it as we watched Gracie sleep. To me, 'lucky' has connotations of magic, sparkling lephrechauns, a wink, and rolling dice. 'Luck didn't have anything to do with it,' I said, whispering to her. She was a gift. We had held out our arms for years; we had held them out till they ached and our bodies shook under the strain. Perhaps that is when a gift is most valued and loved. God is excessive, even reckless, when it comes to grace but it is never wasted and I wonder how often it is acknowledged."
In an earlier passage, as she writes about her "Desert Years," she writes this:
"People who don't believe in God expect nothing of him so are presumably never upset or disappointed with him but for those of us who see his hand on this world in the oceans and stars and in the faces of our neighbors, we expect something, anything, that whispers to us that there is some sort of road map for our life. All of these expectations languish during the desert years."
November 29, 2009
The one complaint I have about Finding Grace, by Donna VanLiere, is that there wasn’t an index highlighting the many brilliant minds mentioned throughout the book. Quoting authors, poets, philosophers, and even the Bible, VanLiere’s literary education is quite impressive. The best quotes though, in my opinion, are from VanLiere herself:
“Sometimes we need to be reminded why we’re here, that we are valued and loved, and at the end of the pain there are still deeper and higher dreams to discover.”
“The mysterious yet wonderful attribute of grace is that it is never earned or deserved, and it will never be forced upon anyone – it can only be received.”
VanLiere’s memoir is at once heartbreaking and inspiring. Her story starts when, as a young girl growing up in Ohio, she is sexually abused. Through this experience and many others in her life, Donna manages to find grace with each new challenge she is faced with.
The author’s search for herself never fails to amuse as she uses humor to sail through the difficulties presented to her.
“No matter what you’re going through, you can be assured of advice from stupid people.”
Reading this book brought me to many different places from my own childhood, growing up in the Midwest, learning – too early – about sexuality, and questioning what it means to trust.
I started reading this book in the morning one day and found myself returning to it again and again, finishing the last page close to midnight that same night. There is something so transforming about reading this book that I definitely recommend setting aside a full day to absorb the intensity of the emotional roller coaster found within.
Finding Grace is so much more than about sexual abuse, becoming a mother or adoption. It’s about discovering the meaning of life and understanding its joys and disappointments. VanLiere’s book is both disturbing and comforting, touching readers in a way that will have them looking inwards and realizing that grace can be found in every situation.
“We arrange our lives to alleviate disappointment, frustration, dissatisfaction, and pain, viewing them as enemies of our soul. But are they always bad? Can’t disappointment and broken dreams actually be good if we listen to what our life is saying through them?”
Donna VanLiere is a bestselling author and speaker. She has published many novels, including The Christmas Hope series. She has won numerous awards and speaks at countless events for women and families.
She lives in Tenessee with her husband and three children.
“Sometimes we need to be reminded why we’re here, that we are valued and loved, and at the end of the pain there are still deeper and higher dreams to discover.”
“The mysterious yet wonderful attribute of grace is that it is never earned or deserved, and it will never be forced upon anyone – it can only be received.”
VanLiere’s memoir is at once heartbreaking and inspiring. Her story starts when, as a young girl growing up in Ohio, she is sexually abused. Through this experience and many others in her life, Donna manages to find grace with each new challenge she is faced with.
The author’s search for herself never fails to amuse as she uses humor to sail through the difficulties presented to her.
“No matter what you’re going through, you can be assured of advice from stupid people.”
Reading this book brought me to many different places from my own childhood, growing up in the Midwest, learning – too early – about sexuality, and questioning what it means to trust.
I started reading this book in the morning one day and found myself returning to it again and again, finishing the last page close to midnight that same night. There is something so transforming about reading this book that I definitely recommend setting aside a full day to absorb the intensity of the emotional roller coaster found within.
Finding Grace is so much more than about sexual abuse, becoming a mother or adoption. It’s about discovering the meaning of life and understanding its joys and disappointments. VanLiere’s book is both disturbing and comforting, touching readers in a way that will have them looking inwards and realizing that grace can be found in every situation.
“We arrange our lives to alleviate disappointment, frustration, dissatisfaction, and pain, viewing them as enemies of our soul. But are they always bad? Can’t disappointment and broken dreams actually be good if we listen to what our life is saying through them?”
Donna VanLiere is a bestselling author and speaker. She has published many novels, including The Christmas Hope series. She has won numerous awards and speaks at countless events for women and families.
She lives in Tenessee with her husband and three children.
September 25, 2025
What a beautiful surprise. I plucked this off the shelf knowing absolutely nothing and I read it in 24 hours. It was the perfect combination of spiritual, memoir, writer’s journey and wisdom, infertility and adoption stories, and doubt and faith. I absolutely loved it.
April 4, 2011
Somebody tell me the most awesome book they've ever read, please. I am so bored. I am in the middle of about ten "meh" books, and I can't summon the energy to finish any of them, and I keep starting new ones hoping for better luck. Maybe I'm the problem. I'm the common denominator. I really want a great, non-fiction book (I'm ho-hum on novels and fiction) that I can escape in and enjoy. I'll give a dollar to anyone who suggests one that I read and end up loving.
This book here is by the author of some famous Christmas fiction books (apparently there was a book to go along with the "Christmas Shoes" song - did you know that?). Since those types of books are definitely not my area of interest, it makes sense this book would kind of drag for me. It's her life story - she was molested as a child, married, struggled with infertility for years before adopting two daughters from China and a son from Guatemala. I found it at D.I. and for some reason I thought I had heard the book was awesome, so I picked it up. I think an LDS book I just read about miscarriage referenced it once, and that's why the name stuck in my head.
Anyhow, I think the story of adopting children from foreign countries could be fascinating. However, this book was light on story and heavy on sermons about grace. She tells something that happens (pretty straight forwardly) like, "We went to China to adopt our first daughter. Then we adopted her." Then she goes for a few pages about grace, and God, and forgiveness, and love, and blah blah blah. It's not bad, but I was constantly losing my place, starting to read where I thought I was, then realizing five pages later I had already read that section but not even noticed because it was all started to sound the same.
I took this book to a spin class at the gym to read while working out because I owned it and could drip sweat all over it, unlike library books. (I am the only one I have ever met who does this, but spin classes are sooo boring, so when I find my schedule forces me to attend one, I've finally started taking a book and sitting by the door for light. I was always too self concious before, then I decided that I knew all the teachers, I know half the people at the gym, I've been going for years, and oh my heck!, spin classes are so dang boring, and I started taking books like the odd girl.) At the end of a class I took this to, the teacher said, "So Abby, is it a good book? What's it about?" I had just read her talking about the neighbor boy who molested her and about twenty minutes on the topic of grace. I was like, "Uh, yeah. It's just the lady, and her life and stuff." I really, REALLY want an interesting book to read. Seriously. If I am going to embarass myself by reading in spin classes, I need to at least have a cool book to show for it.
I would only recommend this book if you have a similar situation as the author - you were molested, you are struggling with infertility, you've adopted, or you have a real fascination with long sermons on grace and God. (Which aren't bad things, mind you. Just hard to get excited about reading sometimes.) Otherwise, read something more interesting and save this book for her posterity to read instead.
This book here is by the author of some famous Christmas fiction books (apparently there was a book to go along with the "Christmas Shoes" song - did you know that?). Since those types of books are definitely not my area of interest, it makes sense this book would kind of drag for me. It's her life story - she was molested as a child, married, struggled with infertility for years before adopting two daughters from China and a son from Guatemala. I found it at D.I. and for some reason I thought I had heard the book was awesome, so I picked it up. I think an LDS book I just read about miscarriage referenced it once, and that's why the name stuck in my head.
Anyhow, I think the story of adopting children from foreign countries could be fascinating. However, this book was light on story and heavy on sermons about grace. She tells something that happens (pretty straight forwardly) like, "We went to China to adopt our first daughter. Then we adopted her." Then she goes for a few pages about grace, and God, and forgiveness, and love, and blah blah blah. It's not bad, but I was constantly losing my place, starting to read where I thought I was, then realizing five pages later I had already read that section but not even noticed because it was all started to sound the same.
I took this book to a spin class at the gym to read while working out because I owned it and could drip sweat all over it, unlike library books. (I am the only one I have ever met who does this, but spin classes are sooo boring, so when I find my schedule forces me to attend one, I've finally started taking a book and sitting by the door for light. I was always too self concious before, then I decided that I knew all the teachers, I know half the people at the gym, I've been going for years, and oh my heck!, spin classes are so dang boring, and I started taking books like the odd girl.) At the end of a class I took this to, the teacher said, "So Abby, is it a good book? What's it about?" I had just read her talking about the neighbor boy who molested her and about twenty minutes on the topic of grace. I was like, "Uh, yeah. It's just the lady, and her life and stuff." I really, REALLY want an interesting book to read. Seriously. If I am going to embarass myself by reading in spin classes, I need to at least have a cool book to show for it.
I would only recommend this book if you have a similar situation as the author - you were molested, you are struggling with infertility, you've adopted, or you have a real fascination with long sermons on grace and God. (Which aren't bad things, mind you. Just hard to get excited about reading sometimes.) Otherwise, read something more interesting and save this book for her posterity to read instead.
December 6, 2009
I'm not a very religious or spiritual person so I was a little hesitant to accept this book to review. I don't mind reading inspirational stories in reference to God, however I do find myself wary of them. So I'm not really sure what my expectations were before reading it. I must admit the blurb made me think I'd at least be able to get through it. I'm happy to report I really enjoyed Finding Grace.
Donna VanLiere's life has definitely been filled with hardships and as she retells her story I couldn't help but feel her pain as she searched for a reason to have faith. There always seemed to be something going wrong and I totally agree: It seemed downright unfair. I too have felt this way before at times. But I didn't really feel a complaining/whining vibe from Donna's words. She was able to write about the difficulties in all the aspects of her life and still keep it light and not too centered on herself. She also included many quotes from different people throughout history that mentions God but didn't stop me from finding them inspirational.
Donna VanLiere's life has definitely been filled with hardships and as she retells her story I couldn't help but feel her pain as she searched for a reason to have faith. There always seemed to be something going wrong and I totally agree: It seemed downright unfair. I too have felt this way before at times. But I didn't really feel a complaining/whining vibe from Donna's words. She was able to write about the difficulties in all the aspects of her life and still keep it light and not too centered on herself. She also included many quotes from different people throughout history that mentions God but didn't stop me from finding them inspirational.
December 16, 2009
Finding Grace, was picked up by me at the library on a whim. I had enjoyed (3) previous books by this author in the Christmas "hope" series: The Christmas Shoes, The Christmas Blessing, and The Christmas Hope, and since the past year has been a trying one for me, I thought perhaps this book might be just what I needed --- yes it was.
In this inspirational memoir the author shares some devastating experiences, beginning early on in life, that would certainly test the faith of many women. It is a story about the "bumps in the road" of life that we are all forced to deal with at one time or another. Beautifully written, thought provoking, but yet never preachy, Finding Grace is a book for anyone who has struggled and asked the question "Why Me?", when bad things have happened to them. HIGHLY RECOMMENDED
May 8, 2012
WOW, read this in 2 sittings.
This puts Oprah's aha moments to shame. VanLiere was able to write about infertility with such honesty without requiring the reader to pity her.
Central theme was "life isn't fair & we don't get what we want".....but wait here come the grace part. We don't get what we want BECAUSE what God has planned for us is FAR better. This book reminds you to let go and let GOD and defines grace and joy so simply that you wonder why you searched for so many years when ALAS you had it all along.
Don't put this book on your "to-read" list..put it on your MUST HAVE list. I got it from the library but will be buying it so I can have it on hand.
This puts Oprah's aha moments to shame. VanLiere was able to write about infertility with such honesty without requiring the reader to pity her.
Central theme was "life isn't fair & we don't get what we want".....but wait here come the grace part. We don't get what we want BECAUSE what God has planned for us is FAR better. This book reminds you to let go and let GOD and defines grace and joy so simply that you wonder why you searched for so many years when ALAS you had it all along.
Don't put this book on your "to-read" list..put it on your MUST HAVE list. I got it from the library but will be buying it so I can have it on hand.
January 7, 2011
I really struggled with this CD. I guess I finished it b/c it was only 4 CDs. I don't know if I didn't find the humor, didn't hear it, or just didn't share the humor. Parts of the book were really good, but parts were just like "oh my, please move on"! There are some good lessons, but if it had been longer than it was, I would not have finished it.
October 6, 2018
This is another new to me author. The writing style is good although it took a little while for me to get into the story. It started getting more interesting toward the end of chapter 1 for me. Donna started talking about how she was abused by a neighbour and her struggle in dealing with this. Only, whilst she convinced herself that she’d dealt with it later in her adult life it became clear that she hadn’t fully dealt with her emotional and spiritual struggle as a result of this and a couple of other instances of abuse. In a way when I found out that her two abusers ended up getting their just desserts I found myself seeing this as justice finally being served.
VanLiere’s honesty and vulnerability I found very heartening and real. In spite of her spiritual struggle, God was still very much a part of her life. I enjoyed reading about her displeasure with God in answering her prayers because it showed a realness about what it is to be a Christian. The God-centredness of this book may not be everyone’s cup of tea but that’s OK.
VanLiere’s use of sarcasm provided some light relief for the reader. On page 127 for example, she describes how a nurse asked her if she had passed out because she was sitting on a chair with her head between her legs, VanLiere’s response was that she hadn’t, she just likes sitting this way. I thought this was a really good response to what was obvious.
I also appreciated how VanLiere didn’t go into a lot of unnecessary detail about the abuse that she suffered. I found that due to how she wrote about these incidences she didn’t need the extra detail. It was very clear what had happened.
VanLiere’s honesty and vulnerability I found very heartening and real. In spite of her spiritual struggle, God was still very much a part of her life. I enjoyed reading about her displeasure with God in answering her prayers because it showed a realness about what it is to be a Christian. The God-centredness of this book may not be everyone’s cup of tea but that’s OK.
VanLiere’s use of sarcasm provided some light relief for the reader. On page 127 for example, she describes how a nurse asked her if she had passed out because she was sitting on a chair with her head between her legs, VanLiere’s response was that she hadn’t, she just likes sitting this way. I thought this was a really good response to what was obvious.
I also appreciated how VanLiere didn’t go into a lot of unnecessary detail about the abuse that she suffered. I found that due to how she wrote about these incidences she didn’t need the extra detail. It was very clear what had happened.
December 22, 2017
READING THIS BOOK IS ESSENTIAL ESPECIALLY WHEN ONE DESIRES GRACE MORE THAN ANYTHING ELSE
Donna kept hitting the nail on the head time after time as she described grace.. Why is it so difficult for us to accept a gift that's freely given? We need to learn this precious gift is freely given in spite of our opinion that we are not worthy as Donna so eloquently illustrates with her word crafting. She found and accepted the most precious gift from our Saviour, Jesus Christ.
Donna kept hitting the nail on the head time after time as she described grace.. Why is it so difficult for us to accept a gift that's freely given? We need to learn this precious gift is freely given in spite of our opinion that we are not worthy as Donna so eloquently illustrates with her word crafting. She found and accepted the most precious gift from our Saviour, Jesus Christ.
August 15, 2021
Talk about Love , Hope and Faith. This True story of finding grace is so uplifting. I could not put this down. It's a true reminder of how Gods grace is with us if we only take the time to see it, feel it experience it. I have fallen in love with Donna VanLiere's writing style and how her humor and determination just come through in all her writings. The Christmas Hope series is how I found her and these other books are 100% amazing as well.
April 4, 2022
Wow! I was so touched by her story, and every one of the nuggets of truth she weaved in through her story.
Her ability to find beauty in her unfulfilled dreams and to see that God had a different plan for her life was so touching to me.
Listened to audiobook.
Her ability to find beauty in her unfulfilled dreams and to see that God had a different plan for her life was so touching to me.
Listened to audiobook.
January 5, 2023
A beautiful book with an immersive story line and strong characters, but toward the last quarter it becomes a bit repetitive, even preachy. I get it; the book is about finding grace. And it was certainly interesting to read about what people think grace is and how to obtain it.
February 21, 2017
This book was very interesting. I cried through some of it. Donna is a brave, strong woman who has overcome some horrific things. I really enjoyed reading this book.
June 23, 2017
One of my favorite books
April 18, 2018
A biographical account of a woman’s journey to motherhood while finding grace along the way.
August 12, 2018
A moving memoir from one of my favorite authors!
September 8, 2018
Some thought provoking and some funny-story of moving beyond a horrific childhood event as well as as grownup difficulties.
January 3, 2020
Not what i wAs expecting.
May 21, 2020
I don’t give 5 stars to very many nonfiction books, but this one deserves it. The audio version is well-read.
July 28, 2020
I loved the story and how she defines grace. It was a bit better Thani expected.
September 24, 2020
Loved this book and there were serval things she brings up about God's grace for us that really hit home, especially for me regarding forgiveness.
September 2, 2021
Wow! Best book ever! Loved it!
February 28, 2022
Oh my goodness - this book is a jewel. Donna's story of grace is inspirational and enduring. If you doubt grace, please be sure to read thus book. And if you don't doubt grace, read it anyway.
April 15, 2022
Thoroughly enjoyed this book, as i read it after reading 4 or 5 of her fiction books.
May 5, 2023
Not a bad book at all - just a little slow moving and it’s sad blow after sad blow.
There were several quotes that were good reminders of grace, but the book is just ok.
There were several quotes that were good reminders of grace, but the book is just ok.
August 4, 2024
Some great advice.
December 16, 2024
I loved this book! It is a true story but so many truths to ponder and enjoy about God’s love for us.
November 6, 2016
While this was a much quicker read than I anticipated, I am glad I read it. I wasn't sure about it at first. The beginning seemed to spend more time talking about Spirituality rather than the author's real story.
There were some definite pluses to this book though. I was built of many beautiful morals (many of which I wrote down just because I felt I had to remember them!) and, in the end, a beautiful story of the struggles of becoming a mother, the horrors of infertility, the bumps in the road of adoption, and the lessons of how we view ourselves in the life.
While the simplistic way in which it's written wouldn't leave me calling it the best book I've read, I would still count this as one of the more important books I've ever read. Life's lessons were illustrated very well and I had moments where I couldn't help but identify. I don't think there is a woman out there that wouldn't.
Not to mention, I know the TV movie The Christmas Shoes and I had no idea Donna VanLiere wrote that story when I picked up this book!
There were some definite pluses to this book though. I was built of many beautiful morals (many of which I wrote down just because I felt I had to remember them!) and, in the end, a beautiful story of the struggles of becoming a mother, the horrors of infertility, the bumps in the road of adoption, and the lessons of how we view ourselves in the life.
While the simplistic way in which it's written wouldn't leave me calling it the best book I've read, I would still count this as one of the more important books I've ever read. Life's lessons were illustrated very well and I had moments where I couldn't help but identify. I don't think there is a woman out there that wouldn't.
Not to mention, I know the TV movie The Christmas Shoes and I had no idea Donna VanLiere wrote that story when I picked up this book!
June 23, 2010
The author's life verse might well be: Galatians 1:15-16a “But when God, who set me apart from birth and called me by his grace, was pleased to reveal his Son in me so that I might preach him …”
VanLiere writes of her personal journey through childhood abuse, past years of infertility, to her quest for purpose. I enjoyed her "language of words" as she told me her story.
We live life in a culture of ungrace (I love the way she worded that), thus we cannot expect to be unscathed or pain free. In fact, we may be the ones exuding ungrace, but in faith we know that his grace responds to our imperfection. Pain leads to growth, suffering to empathy, grief to compassion. God is at work: it is predictable that God will take care of us – unpredictable is how. He works beyond our prayers and gives us the real thing.
What makes my heart glad? When I do _____ I feel his pleasure. He loves me so much, he just wants to be with me.
VanLiere writes of her personal journey through childhood abuse, past years of infertility, to her quest for purpose. I enjoyed her "language of words" as she told me her story.
We live life in a culture of ungrace (I love the way she worded that), thus we cannot expect to be unscathed or pain free. In fact, we may be the ones exuding ungrace, but in faith we know that his grace responds to our imperfection. Pain leads to growth, suffering to empathy, grief to compassion. God is at work: it is predictable that God will take care of us – unpredictable is how. He works beyond our prayers and gives us the real thing.
What makes my heart glad? When I do _____ I feel his pleasure. He loves me so much, he just wants to be with me.
Displaying 1 - 30 of 88 reviews