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Smartass
Dear Author,
I’m screwed! I never should have done that, but it’s not like he didn’t deserve it. Please help me get out of this mess I’ve made!
Photo Description:
The photo is of a young man wearing a T-shirt with the caption “Life is short & so is your penis.”
This story was written as a part of the M/M Romance Group's "Love Has No Boundaries" event. Group members were asked to write a story prompt inspired by a photo of their choice. Authors of the group selected a photo and prompt that spoke to them and wrote a short story.
I’m screwed! I never should have done that, but it’s not like he didn’t deserve it. Please help me get out of this mess I’ve made!
Photo Description:
The photo is of a young man wearing a T-shirt with the caption “Life is short & so is your penis.”
This story was written as a part of the M/M Romance Group's "Love Has No Boundaries" event. Group members were asked to write a story prompt inspired by a photo of their choice. Authors of the group selected a photo and prompt that spoke to them and wrote a short story.
39 pages, ebook
First published June 22, 2013
2 people are currently reading
109 people want to read
About the author
Lynn Lorenz
68 books316 followersLibrarian Note: There is more than one author in the GoodReads database with this name.
(1)gay romance
I’m from New Orleans, that’s N’awlins for those of you who speak the language. I grew up in the Riverbend, or Carrollton, for the old timers, but was a Quarter rat from the age of 11, taking 3 buses to go to art class on Burgundy Street at the Cabrini Doll Museum and NORD center. I attended University of New Orleans and have a BA in Fine Art. My mother worked at Tulane University, six blocks from our house and when we were kids my brother and I parked cars in our driveway for the Saints games at Tulane Stadium. We could get six cars down the drive, two on the front lawn, and two on the street and we only charged $2 a car. We made enough to buy a coupla roast beef po’boys at Comeaux’s on Hickory St. and a snowball over at Williams Snow Ball Stand. We lived 1/2 a block from a cemetery, but doesn’t everyone in N’awlins? We used to watch jazz funerals from our front porch.
Now, my family lives in Katy, Texas. I have a “real” job, a truly supportive and understanding husband, two incredible kids, and a slightly neurotic dog. We used to have a guinea pig, but the dog killed it. Did I say slightly?
My son is 15 and has Asperger’s Syndrome (high functioning Autism) and Crohn’s Disease, and is a constant lesson in patience, acceptance and managing expectations. He’s super smart, loves video games, fencing, movies, building with legos, and hanging around the house. Like me, he believes that it’s all about him. Sometimes, I wonder if I don’t have Asperger’s, too. Oh, and he’s very handsome.
My daughter, 13, is so creative it’s scary- she loves to paint, draw manga and anima, build dioramas with any box she can get her hands on, create worlds with legos and then make movies with them, sculpt people, animals and objects with those little twist ties from the grocery store, does pottery, and wants to be a lifeguard. And she’s smart, too. And
beautiful, inside and out.
I write for a few hours in the evenings and on weekends as much as I can, without neglecting my family. (That laughter you hear is my husband) I attend a critique group, and do whatever the kids are into at the time.
(1)gay romance
I’m from New Orleans, that’s N’awlins for those of you who speak the language. I grew up in the Riverbend, or Carrollton, for the old timers, but was a Quarter rat from the age of 11, taking 3 buses to go to art class on Burgundy Street at the Cabrini Doll Museum and NORD center. I attended University of New Orleans and have a BA in Fine Art. My mother worked at Tulane University, six blocks from our house and when we were kids my brother and I parked cars in our driveway for the Saints games at Tulane Stadium. We could get six cars down the drive, two on the front lawn, and two on the street and we only charged $2 a car. We made enough to buy a coupla roast beef po’boys at Comeaux’s on Hickory St. and a snowball over at Williams Snow Ball Stand. We lived 1/2 a block from a cemetery, but doesn’t everyone in N’awlins? We used to watch jazz funerals from our front porch.
Now, my family lives in Katy, Texas. I have a “real” job, a truly supportive and understanding husband, two incredible kids, and a slightly neurotic dog. We used to have a guinea pig, but the dog killed it. Did I say slightly?
My son is 15 and has Asperger’s Syndrome (high functioning Autism) and Crohn’s Disease, and is a constant lesson in patience, acceptance and managing expectations. He’s super smart, loves video games, fencing, movies, building with legos, and hanging around the house. Like me, he believes that it’s all about him. Sometimes, I wonder if I don’t have Asperger’s, too. Oh, and he’s very handsome.
My daughter, 13, is so creative it’s scary- she loves to paint, draw manga and anima, build dioramas with any box she can get her hands on, create worlds with legos and then make movies with them, sculpt people, animals and objects with those little twist ties from the grocery store, does pottery, and wants to be a lifeguard. And she’s smart, too. And
beautiful, inside and out.
I write for a few hours in the evenings and on weekends as much as I can, without neglecting my family. (That laughter you hear is my husband) I attend a critique group, and do whatever the kids are into at the time.
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 63 reviews
June 23, 2013
Lorenz snuck a storydagger through my not-so-secret armour chink: prince daddycharming rescues smartass brat for cocksucking and lurve.
Thank you Lynn :D
Thank you Lynn :D
July 7, 2013
Ricky is a twinky brat who desperately needs someone to care and protect him, Dirk is a tough ex marine who finds himself drawn to this trouble magnet and his own inner need to be a protector is met when he can't help taking bratty Ricky under his wing. A match made in heaven. Sweet and sexy I really enjoyed this free short. Very enjoyable.
January 30, 2022
3 Stars
Aptly titled, this free short gives readers a 24 hour peak at how trouble-making, down-on-his-luck, SMARTASS, Ricky, is rescued and set-to-rights by ex-Marine and Good Samaritan, Dirk, when the two meet after Ricky is caught causing mischief in a biker bar.
Ricky definitely has a mouth on him. His yearning for acceptance and his need for a firm hand to keep him in line, made no-nonsense, gentle-giant Dirk the perfect man to take on that kind of challenge.
I liked the dynamic here, but it was probably way too short for me to decide whether I liked these characters or not.
Aptly titled, this free short gives readers a 24 hour peak at how trouble-making, down-on-his-luck, SMARTASS, Ricky, is rescued and set-to-rights by ex-Marine and Good Samaritan, Dirk, when the two meet after Ricky is caught causing mischief in a biker bar.
Ricky definitely has a mouth on him. His yearning for acceptance and his need for a firm hand to keep him in line, made no-nonsense, gentle-giant Dirk the perfect man to take on that kind of challenge.
I liked the dynamic here, but it was probably way too short for me to decide whether I liked these characters or not.
June 22, 2013
3.75*
This is another of the wonderful LHNB stories.
I was a little worried about reading this one, looking at the tags it had brat as one, and I absolutely dislike (intensely) when one MC calls the other a brat, whether it's meant affectionately or not.
But I liked the prompt picture and I usually likeMs Lorenz's stories , so I went for it.
Glad I did, it's a quick little story about Ricky, who obviously has some issues, considering he actually goes looking for trouble in the hopes of finding himself a real-life Hero!
Well he finds one in Dirk.
I'd have loved a little more background, especially on Dirk and a little more of what the future holds for these two.
I'm sure Ricky is strong enough to hold his own against a force such as Dirk, and he is also good for adding a bit of excitement in Dirk's life.
This is another of the wonderful LHNB stories.
I was a little worried about reading this one, looking at the tags it had brat as one, and I absolutely dislike (intensely) when one MC calls the other a brat, whether it's meant affectionately or not.
But I liked the prompt picture and I usually likeMs Lorenz's stories , so I went for it.
Glad I did, it's a quick little story about Ricky, who obviously has some issues, considering he actually goes looking for trouble in the hopes of finding himself a real-life Hero!
Well he finds one in Dirk.
I'd have loved a little more background, especially on Dirk and a little more of what the future holds for these two.
I'm sure Ricky is strong enough to hold his own against a force such as Dirk, and he is also good for adding a bit of excitement in Dirk's life.
June 23, 2013
This is a great story, complete and neat. It focuses on Ricky who desperately wants rescuing, and Dirk who can't help himself but be attracted to Ricky's need for security, need for protection.
The characters are depicted deftly and the narrative moves cleanly. Most enjoyable.
The characters are depicted deftly and the narrative moves cleanly. Most enjoyable.
January 19, 2017
I loved the prompt image, I didn't care for the story.
June 22, 2013
3.5 stars - yet another lovely story from the LHNB event. This one is short but incredibly cute. I'd love to see more of Dirk and Ricky. It would be great to see how their relationships develops, as well as to see them get a wonderful happy ending :)
June 23, 2013
Cute, funny and sweet. I agree that I would love these two guys in a book.
Thanks for sharing this with us!
Thanks for sharing this with us!
August 12, 2016
This is a great story, with a lot of humor, some wonderful vibes between the characters, and perfect pacing and energy. Ricky and Dirk jumped off the pages and became real in my mind as I read about their meeting and being drawn together. They’re very different, but like magnets of opposite poles, they are inexorably pulled together.
Ricky is a brat. He lives to antagonize people, start fights, and get in trouble. Somehow he always escapes, until this one time when it looks really bad for him. He has no home to speak of (Dirk calls his "apartment" a crack hole, and that's certainly what it sounds like), and nobody who cares about him. On the streets since he was sixteen, eight years of loneliness have taught him how to defend himself, but the one thing he wants most is missing: someone to care about him.
Dirk is an ex-Marine who is trying to adapt to civilian life. He is fierce, protects what is his, and runs into Ricky by sheer coincidence. Something calls to him, but he doesn’t do relationships or vulnerable. What he does do is protect those who need it, and, from the looks of it, Ricky definitely needs some help. Dirk also wants more, but he wants Ricky to be the one to ask.
If you like stories about a white knight riding in to save a guy in trouble, if you enjoy stories about men who are at opposite ends of the spectrum and make you wonder what could possibly make them stay together, and if you're looking for a read that will pull your heartstrings as it delivers a great mix of hot passion and hope there is someone out there for everyone, then you will probably like this free short story.
Ricky is a brat. He lives to antagonize people, start fights, and get in trouble. Somehow he always escapes, until this one time when it looks really bad for him. He has no home to speak of (Dirk calls his "apartment" a crack hole, and that's certainly what it sounds like), and nobody who cares about him. On the streets since he was sixteen, eight years of loneliness have taught him how to defend himself, but the one thing he wants most is missing: someone to care about him.
Dirk is an ex-Marine who is trying to adapt to civilian life. He is fierce, protects what is his, and runs into Ricky by sheer coincidence. Something calls to him, but he doesn’t do relationships or vulnerable. What he does do is protect those who need it, and, from the looks of it, Ricky definitely needs some help. Dirk also wants more, but he wants Ricky to be the one to ask.
If you like stories about a white knight riding in to save a guy in trouble, if you enjoy stories about men who are at opposite ends of the spectrum and make you wonder what could possibly make them stay together, and if you're looking for a read that will pull your heartstrings as it delivers a great mix of hot passion and hope there is someone out there for everyone, then you will probably like this free short story.
November 14, 2017
It happens a little bit quick but if you can't connect with your hero right away who can you connect with? Ricky, wounded soul just looking for that one guy who's going to care. So glad he finds one.
January 19, 2015
It's sweet and emotional, and it has heart. Ms. Lorenz did a wonderful job at creating Ricky's character. He definitely lived up to my expectations, and Dirk was just so swoon-worthy. While they might be worlds apart in personality and background, they couldn't be more perfect for one another. I highly recommend reading this one!
Ms. Lorenz, thank you so much for choosing my prompt! I couldn't be more happy with how this story turned out.
Ms. Lorenz, thank you so much for choosing my prompt! I couldn't be more happy with how this story turned out.
July 2, 2013
Ricky is a hot little ticket and he knows it. He likes to walk into a room and stir up trouble, then leave the scene before he gets embroiled in the fall-out, whilst wafting wicked brattiness behind him.
Until Dirk gets his number and calls his bluff. Can a gruff ex-Marine looking to love and dominate find something in a little needy twink like Ricky? Heck yeah.
September 30, 2014
This was a surprisingly emotional read for me. Gah...Ricky just about broke me heart with his internal dialogue. Loved these guys and wouldn't mind a revisit at some point to see how they are faring!
June 25, 2013
This was great! I just loved Dirk and how much he wanted to protect and take care of Ricky, so sweet! I really liked the characters and writing in this, it made for a great short story. Thank you!
June 22, 2013
LHNB Story released 22.6.13
Just over 3 stars
A trouble making brat catches the attention of a former marine as he deliberately starts a bar fight. There was instant attraction but not insta-love in this short story which shows the start of a relationship
Just over 3 stars
A trouble making brat catches the attention of a former marine as he deliberately starts a bar fight. There was instant attraction but not insta-love in this short story which shows the start of a relationship
June 23, 2013
3.6
Love a Daddy :-)
Love a Daddy :-)
September 15, 2015
I love this type of stories and the tough guy/soft guy attraction where they end up rescuing each other. Lovely.
October 12, 2016
A short story... With a slow-burn building in the relationship? And one that was so sweet and hot at the same time?
I'm thoroughly speechless.
I can't deny I was a bit put off sometimes with the idea that the first thought on the characters' minds was to get into each other's pants (although it made sense that it wouldn't go deeper than that at first) but in general the development was so nice...
Great, great short story. The characters had depth and personality, and the premise of the story was gripping and wonderfully excecuted. It had true emotion, something that, regardless of my (minimal, but annoying) bitching, I just can't not find myself fascinated by. This story truly swept me off my feet.
I'm thoroughly speechless.
I can't deny I was a bit put off sometimes with the idea that the first thought on the characters' minds was to get into each other's pants (although it made sense that it wouldn't go deeper than that at first) but in general the development was so nice...
Great, great short story. The characters had depth and personality, and the premise of the story was gripping and wonderfully excecuted. It had true emotion, something that, regardless of my (minimal, but annoying) bitching, I just can't not find myself fascinated by. This story truly swept me off my feet.
July 19, 2013
I loved this one and would have wished it to be muuuuuch longer. I'm a sucker for MCs who time and again are "mistreated" by life/people or whatever but DON'T give up. They pick themselves up and go on and these are the really strong people. And people who so deserve some love and peace of mind. Ricky is one of these MCs and an endearing one besides. Really would like to know how he and Dirk (urgh, I don't like this name, had to rename him :-) ) will build a future together and how Ricky will slowly lower the protective walls he built up around himself.
October 8, 2015
Brat? Check.
Big, protective man? Check.
Pet names? Check.
Boy tears? Check.
Melted Dee? Double check.
I loved this sweet little story about a brat who loves to start trouble just to see if someone would step in to stop it. If someone would be his hero. Finally, he finds it in ex marine Dirk. And my heart is giddy and I'm swooning because everything I love is hit just right in this one.
My only lament is that it could have been longer. I would have loved to read more about how these two were going to turn out.
Big, protective man? Check.
Pet names? Check.
Boy tears? Check.
Melted Dee? Double check.
I loved this sweet little story about a brat who loves to start trouble just to see if someone would step in to stop it. If someone would be his hero. Finally, he finds it in ex marine Dirk. And my heart is giddy and I'm swooning because everything I love is hit just right in this one.
My only lament is that it could have been longer. I would have loved to read more about how these two were going to turn out.
November 13, 2013
A brat finds his hero. Dirk sees Ricky getting into trouble and running out of a bar and all of his protective instincts kick in. It’s a short so things move really quickly but I liked these two. Dirk is really gentle and patient with Ricky and Ricky takes the time to step back and think about what it is that he really wants.
April 18, 2015
Nice interpretation of the photo and the story letter. Thank you Lynn Lorenz for donating your story, your time and your talent.
June 22, 2013
2.5 rounded up.
This started off okay but really lost my interest pretty quickly, unfortunately. I want to like it, but it just didn't work for me.
This started off okay but really lost my interest pretty quickly, unfortunately. I want to like it, but it just didn't work for me.
June 23, 2013
MC is a bit too controlling for me.
July 4, 2013
Awww man I want more of these two! It ended too soon. So glad they found each other! So sweet!
July 5, 2013
2.5 stars
July 20, 2013
It started off fun but got a little boring halfway through.
July 28, 2013
A fun read. Ricky takes smart ass to the extreme. Loved his snark and Dirk is the perfect keeper.
February 20, 2015
This was just ok for me.
July 7, 2013
Really cute, short and fun.
Well done.
Well done.
Displaying 1 - 30 of 63 reviews