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Expected

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Sam Sweet is terrified of giving birth.

Only she doesn't dare tell anyone. Especially her grandchild obsessed mother, or her fiance, Simon - top surgeon by day, mind-games expert by night.

Represesed by the expectation of others, Sam feels trapped. All she ever wanted was a crack at independence, but as a catastrophically failed psychiatric nurse who now injects facial fillers into the lines of unhappy women, a career is proving tricky. There's something wrong with the product and clients are suing.

Nasty work colleagues stir up scandalous gossip, and soon Sam hits rock-bottom, consoling herself with button-popping chocolate binges and terrifying spending sprees.

Sam is going to have to find her voice if she ever wants to be herself, fall in love, and follow her dreams.

Alas, the wedding date is set...

246 pages, Paperback

First published June 18, 2013

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367 people want to read

About the author

Sarah E. England

20 books265 followers
Sarah E. England is also known as S.E. England.

Sarah England is a fiction writer based in the UK. With a background in nursing and psychiatry, she began writing 18 years ago. Since then Sarah has had over 160 short stories and serials published, plus a comedy novel in 2013 with the small press. However, it was occult horror and supernatural thrillers that became her speciality. Novels include, the Father of Lies trilogy, The Owlmen, The Soprano, Hidden Company, Monkspike, Baba Lenka, Masquerade and Caduceus. The Witching Hour is a recently revised collection of short supernatural thrillers, crimes and tales with a twist. And finally - just released - new psychological thriller, Groom Lake. All the novels are available in Kindle, paperback and hardback, with most on audio.

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5 stars
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10 (27%)
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Displaying 1 - 20 of 20 reviews
Profile Image for Maria.
Author 2 books32 followers
July 19, 2013
This is a most enjoyable comic read from the wonderful Sarah England, which made me laugh out loud at times. Fair dues to Sarah too, for providing humour on a topic which is actually no laughing matter at all. The truth is, many people, women in particular, have the weight of expectations of others weighing them down and holding them back.

Take this novel's heroine, Samantha Sweet (don't you just love that name?). Sam is burdened by her mother's expectations of being a grandma. That's why she's engaged to a particularly obnoxious specimen of manhood called Simon Bumper. Simon's a mother's dream. A doctor, no less. And very smug he is too at the thought of marrying the working class Samantha and raising her social class a notch or two. He likes the way she picks up his dirty clothes and dishes and cooks his meals while he rubbishes her career as a beauty therapist. What the heck does she want a career for, anyway? Is he not the centre of her universe? Well, no, not really. And poor Sam isn't having it so easy at work either. Everything she touches seems to turn toxic and she's not sure exactly why. A couple of clients are suing the company over botched injections which were supposed to make their wrinkles disappear and made them look like the Bride of Frankenstein instead (my words, not Sarah's). There's a man Sam likes at work, but she can't even go there because of the smug fiance. Her retail therapy excursions have resulted in a credit card bill that's going through the roof - this girl has problems. It's only when she takes back control of her life that the tide starts to turn in her favour.

Ever went to someone's house for dinner and instead of a three course repast with wine and all the trimmings you were served tea and a sandwich instead? Ever went out for your Christmas dinner and instead of good cheer and bonhomie, you found yourself surrounded by screaming kids? There are some hilarious scenes in this book which will have you laughing, even if they wouldn't be very funny to be actually in. Sarah has a keen eye for the follies and foibles of human life and that's her unique talent.

This is a wickedly funny read and I highly recommend it.
Profile Image for Jenny in Neverland.
197 reviews3 followers
September 30, 2013
If you could tape your every thought – that is what this book sounds like. But in a good way. Sometimes “I walked down the dull, dreary street” isn’t realistic when “the weather was shit” will suffice. Sarah told me that Expected wasn’t your “typical” chick lit novel and in which I responded with “different can be good” and in this case in really was. Expected is about a young girl called Sam Sweet (what a name!) Sam is engaged to an infuriating, obnoxious man called Simon, her mother is obsessed with being a grandmother – so much so she adopts herself a doll and carries it around like a child – and Sam’s job is in jeopardy. It’s safe to say Sam isn’t in the position she wants to be in and the pressure on her to get married and have kids is becoming too much. Will Sam crack under the strain of everything and marry Simon? Or will her mother come to terms with the fact that grandchildren may not be on the cards? Join Sam in a hilarious account of her life with a psycho boyfriend, a lunatic mother and a expectation sitting on her shoulders.

I liked how Sam isn’t perfect – nowhere near in fact and Sarah definitely doesn’t try to sugar coat what Sam is thinking for example How would you like your balls strapped to a meat hook? She puts into words what all of us ladies have thought about at one point or another. Whether it be a really rubbish party and we’re wondering why we’re not sitting at home watching sex and the city and eating cookie dough out the pot or realising you’re with the wrong person. I found Sam’s character really interesting. She is a real woman – she gets nervous, anxious and worried and angry and that’s reassuring because there’s nothing worse than reading a book where the main character gets everything she wants. It’s not like most other chick lit books where all the girls want to do is settle down, get married and have a baby. Sam doesn’t want any of that – she is unhappy in her relationship and panics every time someone mentions having kids and I think it’s important to realise that it’s okay – not all women want to settle for the norm and that’s fine and Sam is the perfect example of another woman that’s just expected to do what society says. Sam really engages with the reader. Not Sarah – Sam. She’s sarcastic and asks the reader questions and I found it very unusual but different and entertaining. By 1/3 of the way through I felt like Sam was a friend – not just a character in the book however, she did begin to feel like one of those friends who you love but can only spend so much time with otherwise you want to punch them. I laughed with her ’Old steamy specs’, sympathised with her and cringed with her. Sam’s fiancé, Simon was another very strong character in the book and I loved how Sarah made damn sure we all hated him as much as Sam did. I always try and see the good even in the worst of characters but Simon left me steaming at the ears.

I have read a few reviews on this book that mention they don’t understand why Sam couldn’t stand up for herself and leave Simon sooner and Sarah quite rightly pointed out that “Sam has very low self-esteem and nowhere to run to. She has to find a lot of courage while everything is going wrong but if she slapped him in the face and walked out before she hit rock bottom – there would be no story and women stay with men who are far worse – abusive men even. It’s not always easy to walk out. Sam is from a poor background and is heavily in debt. It happens.. She isn’t Bridget Jones with parents in the country or Becky Bloomwood with a rich boyfriend – she is really on her own!” Don’t get me wrong this was a hilarious and extremely enjoyable book but I definitely think there is an underlying message regarding the importance of emotional abuse, which is what Simon did to Sam on a daily basis by putting her down, implying she’s fat and making her feel like crap. The author never mentions that this is a book about emotional abuse – because it’s not but underneath Sam’s witty humour, funny comebacks and ability to ignore what Simon says, it’s there and it’s important to realise that not all fictional women are going to be strong heroine types.

Find all my reviews here: www.jennyinneverland.wordpress.com
Profile Image for Shani Struthers.
Author 48 books508 followers
October 8, 2013
I've just finished reading Expected and to be fair it wasn't what I expected at all! What I thought I was getting was a humorous romantic romp, what I got was something a lot more thought provoking than that. There are some serious issues in this book: emotional abuse for one, how easy it is to find yourself trapped in life, the illusion often attached to freedom of choice. All heavy issues but wrapped up in a wonderful sense of humour that prevents it from becoming depressing - an admiral achievement. All the way through I was rooting for our beleaguered heroine, Sam Sweet, to see the light concerning the dastardly Simon. Sam's mother too was another tragi-comic character that Sam needed to stand up to. The ending was good but I'd quite liked to have seen Sam stride into the sunset in need of no one but herself - the fact that I wanted that shows how much the character had come to mean to me. Highly recommended.
Profile Image for Kate Robbins.
Author 39 books141 followers
July 24, 2013
A Real Gem!!

"The child was so full of milk, if they shook her up for long enough, she'd crap butter."

EXPECTED follows the life of Samantha Sweet, a former nurse who has opted for a career change. We meet her when she's at a point in her life where she's stopped to take a good look around. She is NOT happy with what she sees.

This story, while tackling some serious issues on the under-current, made me laugh out so many times I lost count. Sam is usually not the kind of protagonist I go for and so the fact that I couldn't put this book down is a testament to the author's fresh and witty writing style.

I can't compare the book to any others because I've not read anything quite like it and that was refreshing. Sarah England has given us a real gem in EXPECTED. Looking forward to more from this author.
Profile Image for Book-shelf Shelf.
473 reviews36 followers
August 18, 2013
A story of Sam Sweet and a section of her life. The part where she is living with Simon and comes to the realization that she doesn't really like him, let alone love him. Her mom however has the full wedding and grand kids planned out as far as booking the venue and buying the dress.
Sarah writes with a lot of wit and keeps the reader entertained on this journey of Sam's, from filling in the faces of the wrinkly women to the shopping sprees she does daily. The story certainly gives the reader a lot to think about where their relationships are concerned and invites us to examine if we to put up with too much. However I have to say i found Sam irritating at times and wanted to jump in the book and slap her, or at the least shake her and get her to wake up to reality. Readers of Sophie Kinsella's 'Shopaholic' books would love this book and should get stuck into it very soon.
Profile Image for Rachel.
Author 114 books214 followers
September 1, 2013

"The child was so full of milk, if they shook her up for long enough, she'd crap butter."

This is by far the funniest line I have heard in a while, and I see from the other reviews that I am not the only one. Sam Sweet is sarky, funny, and trapped. She says and thinks what we all (or maybe just me) are thinking. I think that we have all been swept away into a relationship with a man who does not light our fire, or is quite frankly, a bit of a git and this book explores this with hilarious results. I was rooting for her by the end of the book, and it was a fab read - I really enjoyed her adventures. I have heard talk of a sequel, which would be great, so watch this space!

The editing and formatting are top notch and I adore the cover, bright, engaging and fun - just like the writing.

Rachel Dove
The Kindle Book Review
Profile Image for Gayle Beveridge-Marien.
38 reviews1 follower
September 15, 2013
Expected by Sarah England was both funny and thought provoking. When we meet the protagonist, Sam Sweet, her job is under review, her finances are in disarray and she is teetering at a crossroads in her life. Will she take the safe route and marry a fiancé she doesn't love or will she find the courage and the means to move on?

Sam's problems are exacerbated by a comedy of errors, many of which made me laugh out loud. The author, Sarah England has a dry sense of humour that she has invested in her writing. Not only does she entertain us she makes us think about the nature of relationships, with our partners, our parents, and our friends.

The characters are larger than life. Sam is a train wreck, her mother an absolute hoot and her fiancé is cringe worthy.

This is a fast-paced entertaining read. I found it enjoyable and the funniest novel I have read for a very long time.
Profile Image for Mark Morris.
Author 3 books36 followers
November 4, 2013
This a very enjoyable cross between Cinderella and Bridget Jones which is set in contemporary England. Sam is an angst-ridden cosmetics products rep feeling trapped into the pressures of living a life she's unhappy to commit to and struggling with her self-confidence. The writing is pithy and real – and often hilarious – and you quickly come to empathise with Sam as her life rapidly spirals out of control. The author deals sensitively with some important relationship issues but, on the whole, the book is light and enjoyable and is an entertaining read from beginning to end. Throughout the book, Sam's circumstances and the whole cast of characters are all well realised and this is a book that seemed to end all too soon for me.

A well-deserved five stars (and from a man, no less!)
Profile Image for Sue Watson.
Author 50 books1,548 followers
September 23, 2013
I LOVED this book. A well-written, funny tale about former-nurse Sam, who’s found herself in an unsatisfying relationship while dealing with all the other issues life throws at us. Struggling with a career-change, and work/life balance Sam is a flesh-and-blood flawed heroine you don’t forget. She’s not a one dimensional ‘Little Miss Perfect’ which for me made her so much more real and had me rooting for her throughout. Sarah England’s writing style is brilliant - chatty and casual yet draws you in so easily - it’s like a friend is telling you what happened next. Not only is it very funny, the novel also makes you question relationships and people’s behaviour along the way. All in all a fantastic read, just turn off your phone and be prepared to lose yourself for a while in Sam’s life.
Profile Image for Gina Dickerson.
Author 35 books184 followers
August 21, 2013
This is the second book I've read by this author but the first novel. (The first book was 3am & Wide Awake - a short story collection, which was very good). Sam Sweet is a likeable character, yes she's a bit ditsy and puts up with an awful lot from her boyfriend Simon but that's what makes her so likeable. I laughed with her, cringed, gasped, and cheered her on. I really enjoyed this read, it was funny, entertaining, and I liked the style in which it is written. Is there more for Sam Sweet? I hope so.
Profile Image for Rebecca Raisin.
Author 39 books1,355 followers
July 21, 2013
This book had me laughing out loud literally!
I had to stop and read the hilarious parts to my boyfriend because he thought it was odd I kept giggling to myself.
Sam Sweet is trying to muddle her way through life and she grew on me so much I wanted to reach through the pages, grab her chunky kit kat and stab Simon in the jugular for her. The quality of the writing stood out for me and I enjoyed the book so much that I seriously hope there's a follow up. I want to see what Sam gets up to next!
Profile Image for Tracy Simmons.
Author 4 books15 followers
September 30, 2013
I felt a bit breathless as I read Expected. It's fast-paced with many laugh-out-loud passages. I enjoyed the author's voice and kept (hopefully) turning the page, looking forward to the moment when Sam would take charge and stand up for herself and tell her boyfriend/mother/employers where to go. The end wasn't quite what I expected, but it was a sweet and happy ending that left me feeling satisfied. I will definitely look forward to more books by Sarah England.
Profile Image for Jeff Gardiner.
Author 19 books33 followers
August 19, 2013
Very funny - 'Expected' is a delirious and manic narrative that sparks and trips off the pages. Even as a bloke reading chick-lit (the therapy is too expensive) I thoroughly enjoyed the sarcastic and self-absorbed humour that comes from the first-person narrative. Many of the characters are grotesque and exaggerated (ie. the mum and boyfriend) - but this only adds to the comedy and - strangely - to the reality that poor Sam Sweet must face in her crazy world. Read it and giggle inanely.
Profile Image for Rebecca Emin.
Author 12 books148 followers
October 21, 2013
A well-written book which made me laugh aloud in several places, I particularly liked the way the character "spoke to the reader" at times, always in such a humorous way.

Not your typical formulaic chick lit, (and thank goodness for that) but a book which you could easily sit and absorb in one go (if you don't have kids/work etc).

Love the cover as well.

I'm already looking forward to the next book by Sarah England.
Profile Image for Sarah Louise Smith.
Author 6 books56 followers
November 5, 2013
"Prepare to be dazzled" - a line from this book and also my advice to those about to read it. This novel had me laughing out loud all the way through. The protagonist, Sam, is in a mess and goes on a hilarious journey of self discovery. The writing style is very direct, with Sam often addressing the reader directly, and the whole thing moves along at a fast and exciting pace. One of the best chick lit novels I've read this year.
Profile Image for K.B. Walker.
Author 3 books20 followers
September 26, 2013
On the surface Sam, the main character and narrator, is a hopeless airhead bumbling her way through life trying to live up to everyone's expectations from her mad mother to her repulsive psychotic boyfriend, with a horrible boss thrown in. Yet somehow, I liked her and found the book compulsive reading. A sure sign of good writing. The satisfying ending left me with a smile on my face.
1 review
December 30, 2013
a hilarious yet thought provoking novel. laugh out loud in many places, squirm inducing embarrassments in others and with debate invoking points tapping you on the shoulder along the way. recommended.
Profile Image for Laura Besley.
Author 10 books59 followers
July 11, 2013
If you love Bridget Jones (Bridget Jones' Diary, Helen Fielding) or can relate to the problems of Becky Bloomwood (Shopaholic series, Sophie Kinsella) then you'll love Samantha Sweet, the main character in Sarah England's debut novel, Expected. In the book Sam describes herself as "a plump, debt-ridden spinster, shackled to a peevish psychopath, and about to lose [her] job." Essentially a modern-day love story, England's characters take us on a journey of discovery: one of friendships, family ties, job satisfaction and ultimately love.

If I'm completely honest, I couldn't totally empathise with Samantha Sweet. I don't find her a strong 21st century female character and am not sure she's setting a good example for young women of today. She seemed utterly clueless as to how to run her life (without the help of one man or another). The mildly amusing situations she often found herself in sometimes bordered on the ridiculous.

Having said this, the book was well-written and compelling. I found the relationship between her and her mother to be touching in places, as she struggled with her mother's declining health. I read the book from cover to cover in only a couple of days as I did want to find out what happened and whether Samantha would pull herself together enough to steer her life in the right direction. I would recommend this to anyone who wants a light & easy read (but make sure you take your feminist hat off before you start it!).
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
Profile Image for Samantha March.
1,102 reviews326 followers
July 1, 2013
I received a copy of Expected by Sarah England in exchange for an honest review.

I struggled a bit with this novel. I understand that Sam could be trapped and like she feels, well, Expected, to do certain things, but I didn’t really get why she wouldn’t eventually stand up for herself. She seems to hate her fiancé who was portrayed as mind-game expert and was really quite a piece of work. She out and out said she wasn’t attracted to him and didn’t want to be with him, so why she stayed with him for so long confused me. It was interesting to read about her work and the bit of scandal that came with that, but then I also couldn’t decide if her friend Minnie was truly her friend or not. I spent most of time confused and unsure about the heroine, but still certain pieces of the story caught my interest.
Profile Image for Komal.
44 reviews18 followers
July 2, 2013
I read a kindle sample of this book and found the beginning quite interesting, so decided to buy the book and see how the story goes forward. But to my utter disappointment, the protagonist did not grow and mature as the story unfolded in series of repititive rants and use of excessive "fuck" language from the characters. I found the frequent use of foul language gross.

The faults in a character are relatable when the writer brings out the inner beauty and makes the characters realise their wrongs so the story ends on a plausible and logical outcome, which did not happen in this book.

The writer starts it with a bang but then brings the storyline to a halt and as a reader it frustrated me.

Give it a miss!
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