This Animal Body

by Meredith Walters

Frankie Conner, first-year graduate student at University of California, Berkeley, is finally getting her life together. After multiple failures and several false starts, she’s found her calling: become a neuroscientist, discover the cause of her depression and anxiety, and hopefully find a cure for herself and everyone like her. But on her first day of the program, Frankie meets a mysterious group of talking animals who claim to have an urgent message for her. The problem is, they’re not willing to share it. Not yet. Not until she’s ready.

While Frankie’s new friends may not have her highly evolved, state-of-the-art, exalted human brain, they do know things that she doesn’t—poems, scientific facts, and what happened in the forgotten years before her adoption. Frankie can’t dismiss her conversations with these animals as mere dreams, but she also can’t accept them as real. To prove she’s still sane, she investigates her past and conducts scientific experiments to test how much animals are capable of communicating. But just when Frankie uncovers the truth, she has to make an impossible choice: betray the animals she’s fallen in love with—or give up her dream of neuroscience, her last chance at success, and everything she thought she knew.

Genres: Fantasy, Fiction

360 pages, Paperback

Published April 16, 2024

About the author

Growing up in Atlanta, Meredith Walters often wandered nearby forests looking for animals and magic and writing stories about what she found. After getting a BA in literature from UC Berkeley, she spent ten years trying to figure out what she wanted to do with her life. Her adventures included volunteering for a nonprofit in Mexico, getting an MBA, and working for a social enterprise startup.

Eventually, she moved back East to be close to her human and non-human family. She now lives in Atlanta, Georgia, working as a life/career coach helping others rediscover their lost magic and once again writing stories about what she finds on her wanders through the woods.

Her debut novel, This Animal Body , won the Coming-of-Age category in the 2024 American Fiction Awards and was a finalist in the 2024 International Book Awards.

Reviews

[Carah · Rating 2 out of 5]

This book was a bit too woo-woo for my taste. I lacked connection to the characters and it felt a little bit all over the place. I thought about DNFing at one point, but thought there would be something big and impactful at the end that would tie everything together… sadly that just wasn’t the case.

[Erin E. · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book certainly makes me double down on my view that all living beings have a purpose and a spirit (agh! even the Cockroach!). It was cleverly written, almost more like a screenplay. I could see this turning into an anime film some day, or akin to Charolette's Web where you take your kids to see it and they love it, while the parents get oodles of wisdom for how to live a good life. Otherwise, I think it would be a great book to give to anyone 13 and up, as I believe youth could especially relate to Frankie given their often greater understanding and awareness that animals are sentients. We all must find a way to adhere to certain societal constructs in order to earn a living, while at the same time, not decimating our integrity and passions in the process. To find that balance is a true feat. This story sheds some insights on what's at stake in the process and the rewards that might follow if you take the risk of living from your inner knowing and truth. I was certainly grateful to receive a free review copy (ARC - Advanced Reader Copy) of the book.

[Lally Pia · Rating 5 out of 5]

The author takes a provocative look at the relationships we form with our animal companions. Their inner thoughts, feelings and, yes, even their philosophies, are revealed in exquisite detail. I enjoyed her sensitive touch as she drew us deftly into a fantastical world. Depression and loss weighed heavily upon me at some parts, yet she somehow managed to pull out a positive and hopeful ending. After reading this book, you will think differently before you kill a roach!

[Margo Geller · Rating 5 out of 5]

Meredith has a unique perspective on the connection between nature and all living beings, including humans and animals. I would highly recommend to anyone who feels a special connection with nature and animals. Also for those who struggle with anxiety or depression. Meredith’s writing style is magical and engaging.

[Alicia Rodriguez · Rating 5 out of 5]

This Animal Body by Meredith Walters is a lyrical and grounded exploration of our deep kinship with the natural world. With poetic insight and somatic presence, Walters invites us to remember that we are not separate from nature but part of its living web—alive, sensing, and inherently connected. Frankie, the protagonist, dances between a kind of dreamtime with her wise animals and the real world, fraught with the pressures of life. Through them she learns that true wisdom often arises from listening to the land, and from honoring the quiet intelligence of our own bodies.

This book is a gentle companion for those craving reconnection with the Earth, but primarily with themselves, and with a more intuitive, embodied way of being. Although fiction, I recommend Meredith’s book for readers who appreciate nature writing, and the quiet revelations found in the work of Robin Wall Kimmerer, Sharon Blackie, or Mary Oliver.

[Robin · Rating 5 out of 5]

This Animal Body is for those of us who crave a deeper connection to the more than human world and-even better-for those who have never considered the idea of kinship and communication beyond our more proscribed definitions of family.

In This Animal Body we get to share in our heroine Frankie’s incredible - though sometimes unsettling - connection to creatures great and small, familiar and more remote all while navigating the life changes of a young woman as she finds her way - HER way - in the world.

And after reading my ARC of This Animal Body, I find myself listening for a wisecrack or a piece of wisdom from the odd cockroach before catching it carefully in my bug net and shaking it free out back!

[The Bookish Chimera - Pauline · Rating 3 out of 5]

“Y’all good at hiding what you’re feeling. It’s part of the reason we’re here.”

I struggled with this book. Deeply. I don’t know what to think about it.
The themes, about our relationship with Nature, about how we forget to feel and sense, about how modern life hurts us are important. But.
Despite the fact that my life deeply connects with Frankie’s –and her father and boyfriend– I couldn’t find a way to bond with the characters through the story. There was too much pain, too much anger, too much violence. I don’t even think about the human’s violence towards animals, nature and other human beings. I mostly think about Frankie and how she screams at the world (and herself). I understand why the author chose this direction. But it was too much for me, provoked some deep and too painful antagonism in me. It can work completely differently for someone else, though. Maybe I’m just not at the right moment in my journey.
Outside the epilogue, there wasn’t peace, even when Frankie was with her foster mother or the animals. I would have liked more connection with nature, more progressivity in the character’s evolution (that often felt unnatural/speeded up) and that the book wasn’t based only on the “words experience” but also on the untold, the felt. It was (I believe) one of the messages, but it lacked “sensations”. Maybe it was the moral, but it made the story painful, difficult to go through.
It also felt sometimes a bit too literal –and the writing too self-assured and moralizing as if it delivered some “pure truth” (IMO)– and some metaphors would have helped to base the discourse. That would have helped to breathe a bit. With the choices made here, it was too difficult (for me) to establish some connection, to feel empathy towards the statements –although I share most of the beliefs and values, and, just like Frankie, decided to stop my career’s path because of that.
I can’t say I disliked the book. I can’t say I liked it either. But it made me think. And that’s a great thing in itself.

NB: a time frame would have been good. Some of the experiments discussed in the story are 25YO and seeing them as outbreaks felt strange.
Also, TW about animal abuse, self directed violence and anger should (IMO) be added.

I would like to thank BooksSirens, Meredith Walters and SparkPress for the ARC in exchange for my honest review.

[Elizabeth · Rating 5 out of 5]

At its heart, This Animal Body is a love story – not in the conventional sense of romance, though that’s one thread of this richly woven tale – but in all its many forms. It chronicles the journey of Frankie Conner, a sensitive, highly compassionate young woman who uses her intelligence and wry humor to navigate her lifelong struggle with depression. As a newly minted neuroscience doctoral candidate, she embarks on unconventional research rooted in the deep connections she feels with the animal world. At the same time, a council of animal elders contacts her in her dream life. They provide guidance through some of the challenges of head and heart that she grapples with in this new chapter of her life.

The animals’ wise counsel and sharply etched personalities make for some of the most vivid scenes in the book. As Frankie struggles to believe and then embrace their teachings, they prove to be uncannily insightful in helping her uncover more about the many mysteries in her life – her origin story as an adopted daughter, the development of her scientific investigations, and most importantly, the ways that she explores what it means to be vulnerable and honest in her relationships with others and herself. The author deftly keeps the plot moving on the level of career, romance, family relations and Frankie’s quest to discover who she truly is, with several surprises along the way.

The characters are complex, and the writing richly textured with poetic imagery. Perhaps most moving is the way that Walters empathetically traces Frankie’s slowly evolving journey to self-love, with all her imperfections and radiant strengths. Her animal companions serve as a resonant chorus, shoring up her voice when it falters and helping her to find her own song and the way it harmonizes with all of creation. This tender tale is ultimately an odyssey of self-discovery, and an ode to the unseen web of love which connects us with all beings.

[Sarah Wahl · Rating 5 out of 5]

Oh my god, to say this book has changed me is an understatement. It was heavy at times, but what is life without tragedies? The way that depression was talked about made me cry, to be honest. There are times when my depression feels all-encompassing, leading me to feel isolated and empty. As simple as it seems, reading Walters talk about how having depression doesn't make you less of a person hit close to home. I just need to buy this book ASAP so others around me can read it.

Quotes:
"I don't think depression is a defect. I personally find it a healthy response to an unhealthy world. Shutting down when the world is falling apart isn't a sign of dysfunction. Plunging forward like nothing is wrong is what doesn't make any sense" (260)

"We need more than logic. We need love, compassion, and kindness. Humor, beauty, and awe. Most of all, we need belonging and meaning. Without it, a part of us starves" (261-262)

"The abyss - the emptiness that I've feared, that I've been ashamed of, that I've carried inside me as long as I can remember- it's not empty after all. I am not empty after all. Rather, I'm filled with a power, a wild and fierce and tender power" (329-330)

"There are many things in this world i cannot be sure of. The one thing I do know is this: Freedom and love are all that there is, all that have ever been" (330)

[Megha Modi · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is a really beautiful, soulful book that is also immensely readable. I couldn’t put it down after I got into it, and spent my entire weekend immersed in it. 

It drew me in slowly, then I was swept into its waters, then briefly shook in its turbulent heart, and then came back to restful and calm waters, irrevocably touched by the experience and connected with my own knowing. 

This book is proof of the power of creative storytelling - it can land certain truths in you better than any advice given or courses taken. The story effortlessly weaves in themes of our connection with the animal and natural world, the experience of depression, the longing for meaning in our lives, and the possibility of love and compassion. 

The quality of writing was superb and some sentences evoked a beautiful, vivid sense within me. Like this one: “Even the moist, fragrant earth and the brilliant blue sky seem to whisper and sway as if animated with a life force of their own.”

I am left inspired to keep listening to this wild, animal body of mine and to all that life is speaking to me, trusting that I’ll find my way forward if I just keep listening. 

[Beatrice · Rating 5 out of 5]

After trying and failing to launch her adult life several times, Frankie is ready to start her first year at the neuroscience graduate program at U.C. Berkeley on the right foot. Having endured bouts of depression for most of her life, she’s determined to follow through on her new career path to find a cure for herself and others like her. After an unfortunate first day of class, Frankie begins to encounter a group of animals in her dreams that claim they have an important message for her that she’s not quite ready to hear yet. When her dreams of them begin to blur against the edges of her waking life, she has to make some hard decisions that could derail the life she’s worked so hard to build. Walters’ writing style is phenomenal! Not only is the plot enchanting, but the conversations between Frankie and the animals are so emotionally vibrant and empathetic that I carried them with me for days after finishing the book. Heartfelt, full of bittersweet realizations, and sentimental without being mawkish; This Animal Body is a lovingly crafted and philosophically inclined novel perfect for fans of top-tier magical realism.

[Ellen Barker · Rating 5 out of 5]

Is it an allegory? A mystical fantasy? Or did it all really happen? It doesn’t matter. Not at all. This intriguing story of a young woman finding her way by exploring her past is a treasure. It is narrated by Frankie, a graduate student in neuroscience, who has never come to terms with being adopted. Told in present tense, we follow her through the trials of discovery: where she came from, what she should be doing now, and how the animals around her enlighten her journey. “Science is a good way to discover one kind of truth,” one of the animals tells her, “Though what you find always depends on who is asking and how you frame the question.” As she studies the physiological nature and function of the learning process in the lab, she also listens to the animals. Is she dreaming the animals, or are they real? Walters handles this question so deftly that the reader doesn’t need to decide. We come away with a new understanding of our own place in the world, where it is so easy to forget that the flora and fauna around us are more important to us than we are to them.

[Marina DelVecchio · Rating 5 out of 5]

I just loved this book. I had to stop a few times just to marvel at the unique approach and the fantastical situations I found myself sharing with the main character, Frankie. This novel is character-driven from beginning to end (exactly how I like my books), and the character Walters acquaints us with is a brilliant PhD student who suffers from depression, is misunderstood, brilliant, empathic, adopted, and talks to animals. I've never read a novel like this and found myself in awe of the writer's ingenuity and the character's complexity. At the heart of this novel are the universal complexities that women encounter, the way society vilifies depression and those who suffer from it, and a new way of understanding and experiencing depression — not as a deficit but as a response to the unhealthy burdens society imposes on empathic and loving creatures— animals and people. This is a very heart-warming book, and as I finished it, I closed the final page and said aloud, "Wow, that was such a good book." It truly was.

[Kristen · Rating 5 out of 5]

As someone who shares Frankie’s love of animals and struggle with depression, I’m deeply grateful for this book. Walters has woven a compelling page-turner from the story of one woman’s struggle to understand her past and claim and share her gifts.

Sweeping readers into Frankie’s journey, Walters writes with beauty, grace, confidence, and force about the challenge of living in a society that offers little space or appreciation for connecting with and learning from our fellow animals and the natural world. I was quite undone by the book at points — moved to tears and unwilling to put it down. I re-read several of the passages because they were so achingly lovely, wise, and true.

This is the rare book I will read again because its lessons bear regular repeating in these overstimulating, screen-focused times. Through Frankie, Walters gives voice — and grounding comfort — to those (human and nonhuman) whose point of view is too rarely represented in our popular culture.

[Sue · Rating 5 out of 5]

Frankie has just entered the PhD program in neuroscience at UC Berkeley. Plagued by depression, she is hoping to help people find relief for that and other mental afflictions. She is far from home, doesn’t get along well with her adopted family, and is nervous as hell about succeeding while working in a lab with two other students and a crochety professor for whom nothing she does is ever right. At the same time, she is searching for her birth mother and may have finally found her. Frankie has been having vivid dreams in which she talks with a group of animals who give her advice and sometimes quote poetry. When she starts remembering encounters with these animals in real life, things get quite confusing. This is a weird and wonderful book that I highly recommend. Walters leads us to consider our relationships with animals, our own animal nature, and to ponder what we believe in and what’s worth fighting for.

[Ann · Rating 5 out of 5]

In This Animal Body, Meredith Walters draws the reader into a fascinating place where science meets spirit, and spirit abides. A young woman’s deep exploration of her own past and struggles to find a meaningful path forward takes the reader to a magical forest where wise animals show her that, far from being isolated and disconnected as she feels in her depressive states, she is in fact deeply connected to all living beings. I was touched by the lessons the protagonist, Frankie, learns from a wise cockroach, a rooster and squirrel, and how a magnificent wolf becomes her source of maternal love. All of this magic is balanced by her scientific exploration into animal communication and the hard, human struggles of relationship, and love. This is a story of wonder, compassion, exploration and forgiveness that will stay with you, opening your heart to the heart of nature around you.

[Mary Pascual · Rating 5 out of 5]

Original, moving, and not to be missed! This story was so powerful! It follows Frankie, a neuroscience grad student who struggles with depression, anxiety, and missing parts of her past, as she navigates the tricky politics of science research. Just keeping her life in order is difficult enough, but when she suddenly starts receiving messages from animals, she is thrust into a whole other level of personal crisis. Frankie is so relatable and easy to root for – even when she’s making mistakes – I was engaged from beginning to end. The animals are amazing too! A deeply empathetic and nuanced story of self-discovery that brought together spirituality, mental health, science, communication and connection in a way I haven’t seen before. And on top of that, it made me cry (in a good way)! This book is going to stay with me a long time. Masterfully done!

[Sue Relihan · Rating 5 out of 5]

I was lucky enough to receive an advanced copy of "This Animal Body". It captivated me from the very beginning, drawing me into a world of intrigue. The skillful storytelling weaves a tapestry of emotions, leaving me eager to turn pages to unravel the secrets hidden within.

The characters are richly developed, each with their own complexities and vulnerabilities. The story is a compelling exploration of self-discovery, and the supporting cast adds depth and authenticity to the narrative. Meredith Walters skillfully navigates the balance between plot and character development, creating a story that is both engaging and emotionally resonant. It is a must-read, its universal themes and relatable characters make it accessible to a wide audience.

[Karen · Rating 5 out of 5]

This Animal Body is a stunning and tender invitation to step into our deep connecting to nature and honor its ability to teach is about our true nature. It’s written beautifully and encourages us to trust in self and our deepest knowing and intuition. In a culture that compels us to towards an outer sense safety and success, it reminds us of the innate gift of wilderness and connection when we trust our inner most knowing and land in natural home and the resources that arrive without effort. Thank you for this book and its invitation to trust.

After reading this book, I found myself slowing down to chat with the birds.

A wonderful read for anyone whose nervous system fed by the natural world.

[Gail McCormick · Rating 5 out of 5]

This Animal Body, A Novel is the story of a neuroscience grad student’s fascinating journey to find her birthmother in order to make sense of her strange communications with animals, her mental health challenges, and her life purpose. In this wild and wonderful tale, author Meredith Walters brilliantly illuminates the blurred lines between nature and belonging, fantasy and truth, humans and other animals, life and death. Her skillful use of magical realism enables readers to internalize complexities that speak to the soul. This gestalt of neuroscience, nature, healing, and mental health is a winner, figuratively and literally. Profound, entertaining, and highly recommended for both teenagers and adults.

[Linda · Rating 5 out of 5]

This Animal Body presents an original narrative that blends science, an animal world that transcends our rational understanding and a troubled narrator. The budding neuroscientist explores her hypothesis about the communication abilities animals in an attempt to understand her own world. Her depression and the upheaval she faces with human relationships and understanding her background complicate her efforts to make sense of things. It is an imaginative read that raises issues shared between humans and shared between humans and other creatures in a way that challenges our perceptions about how the world fits together.

[Sue Camaione · Rating 5 out of 5]

Magical, smart, and full of unexpected emotion—This Animal Body is a stunning debut. Frankie Conner is a grad student chasing scientific truth but ends up finding so much more in the voices of her new, unlikely animal companions. Meredith Walters weaves neuroscience, memory, mental health, and animal consciousness into a story that’s equal parts fable and psychological mystery. It’s deeply hopeful without being naïve. As someone who has worked with neuroscientists and is a vegetarian, I found this novel especially powerful. If you like stories that challenge the boundary between human and nonhuman, don’t miss this.

[Ulrike Ackerman · Rating 5 out of 5]

I received a free Advanced Reader Copy for review, and I could not put it down! This lovely, complex tale of animal-human interaction, with a critical eye on human behavior, gives pause for thought. Frankie reminds us that we are guests of Mother Earth and the importance of a balanced existence with our non-human friends. Her personal struggles illustrate how difficult human relationships can be until we are at peace with ourselves. Meredith Walters deep connection to and love for animals and nature shines through this beautifully written novel.

[Reader · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is a special book. Walters invites you inside the heart and mind of someone grappling with the enormity of holding love and compassion, fear, sadness, existential angst, and a deep capacity for mindful attunement to herself and the world around her. With intuitive and evocative detail she illustrates just how possible, and at times painful, living with this marbled mess can be. Fans of magical realism, mindfulness, nature, and the painfully beautiful complexities of this life have a new book to love!

[Lynne O'Connor · Rating 5 out of 5]

Speaking with Animals
I loved binging my way through this delightful tale!! From page one, This Animal Body invites readers to experience a wise and empathetic graduate student’s enchanting dance between the limitations of our modern human world and one where, as Barry Lopez describes in Crow and Weasel, people and animals still speak the same language. If you love animals, enjoy well-developed characters and good storytelling, treat yourself to this charming journey by Meredith Walters. You won’t regret it.

[Ginny · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is a very unique and compelling story, one that raises big questions about humans and our relationship to the animal kingdom. The main character's journey was fascinating, and I really enjoyed the host of animals around her (with a special shoutout to Sweetpea the squirrel, who was adorable). I was very moved in certain scenes involving the wolf and also touched by the lessons of connection and compassion that the narrator learns. This would be great to read in a book club ... there are so many things to discuss!

[Karen Solt · Rating 5 out of 5]

What a wonderful novel with tremendous depth, compassion, insight...one that makes the reader consider the life and purpose of every being. If the true quest is to achieve love and freedom, we need to realize that we won't get there unless we ALL get there, even and especially the most judged amongst us, which Walters creates in This Animal Body as the cockroach (and if you can make a cockroach a supreme being, you have created magic). I feel like I just had the privilege of reading one of the first books of a true mythicist, and I truly hope to read more of her work in the future.

[Krystle Amir · Rating 5 out of 5]

Friends can come in many forms, and love is just as varied. This Animal Body teaches and soothes in equal measure through a discovery of self and empowerment of personal belief systems. While painting poetic images of Nature and the lives of beings all around us, an alternative perspective on how we manage depression and anxiety is discussed. After reading, I felt refreshed and calmed in a sense. As if given a key to snaring some of the worries that plague the day to day.

[Nancy Chadwick · Rating 5 out of 5]

Walters explores the relationships we have with ourselves and with the natural world. She weaves well the main character, Frankie, as she searches for many answers to her depression, her birth mother, and her life's place in a doctoral program. Walters keeps good pacing, moving the story through with use of heavy dialogue throughout among friends, animals, and self. There are many takeaways here, as Walters presents them in a well thought-out, imaginative, and creative story.

[Don Walker · Rating 5 out of 5]

Meredith writing was captivating !!
Amazing read from cover to cover.

It makes you think about the misfortunes of little creatures
and explore the complex dynamics between humans and
animals.
Meredith has a very unique style, with eloquence and humor she moves your brain into the history and makes you wonder what other universes are beneath our heads.


-JD