One Perfect Day: A Mother and Son's Story of Adoption and Reunion

by Diane Burke, Steve Orlandi (Primary Contributor)

The moment Diane Burke, an author and mother of two grown sons, received an unexpected certified letter in the mail, she had no idea her life would be shaken to its core. Memories of a past she had buried more than forty years ago suddenly resurfaced and she wasn't prepared to deal with them.

Steve Orlandi, happily married, father of two and step-father of three, was living the typical middle class American life. But since the age of eight, when he discovered he was adopted, he had led that life dealing with inner questions about his self-identity and genetic history. Always on his mind was one simple, yet complicated and loaded Who am I?

In One Perfect Day , Diane shares with readers how she came to the heartbreaking conclusion to give her baby up for adoption and how this decision has affected her life sense. Through Steve's invaluable perspective, readers will also experience the lengths he traveled to discover his mother's identity and reach out to her, not knowing whether she'd want to meet with him after nearly four decades of separation. It all comes together on one perfect day.

This book asks and answers the What defines family? What does it mean to forgive? And is it worth the time, energy, and emotional cost to love a stranger?

Genres: Nonfiction, Adoption, Memoir, Biography

192 pages, Hardcover

First published April 1, 2014

About the author

This award winning author lives in Central Florida. She loves to visit the beach, spend time with friends and family, read, and, of course, write, write, write.

She loves to hear from her readers. Catch her on her website dianeburkeauthor.com for her latest books or write her at diane@dianeburkeauthor.com

Reviews

[Jan Jackson · Rating 5 out of 5]

I read this book in one sitting, could not put it down. While the book is billed as an adoption/reunion story, that's not what it was for me. It's a story of one woman's courage. Every tough choice, every stumble, every fall, she found a way to get back up. She gives reasons why. For her children, with the help of friends, family, and ultimately God. But I think it was something else. I think it was the hope that someday she'd finally have the family she'd always wanted. A family who makes her feel wanted, valued, and loved. In the end, isn't that what we all want? Read it for yourself. I think it has a message we all need to hear.

[Caroline · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is a wonderful true life story about how time and circumstance right themselves into the most unexpected of blessings. When Diane Burke gave her son up for adoption as a young mother under pressure of her mother, she never expected to see him again. This is both her story and that of her son Steve, and how being apart and later reunited affected their lives. Truly a beautiful and honest memoir that is a great testament to faith, forgiveness, and love.

[Joni Fisher · Rating 5 out of 5]

This heart-wrenching story of giving a child up for adoption reveals the void and sense of loss in both mother and son. Their lives change after the son launches a search for his birth mother. This candid story is told from the point of view of the mother and son.

Brilliant, bold, and inspirational. Recommended reading for people who love stories of complicated families and the power of love.

[Jeanette · Rating 3 out of 5]

Extremely quick read, simplistic writing. I almost gave it a 2 star because for such a strong and primal subject, I didn't feel any depth in the writing. This author uses the same words to describe the betrayals or parental denials, for instance, over and over. And then will go on to rather fuel conflicts with her own indecisiveness. Diane still doesn't seem to "own" her own autonomy completely, IMHO. Steve complains about lacks too of his teen age period, having to work, financial mostly. As if they both missed a greener grass, or some perfect place for which they were entitled. I find that strange and rather counter productive to the "heart-felt" parts of this book. Adoption is still a common occurrence, lucky for all when everyone is alive and well 40 plus years later. That's not always the case. They are lucky ones. She forgives in words, but her descriptions of the past and of the explanations of her choices and consequences rather conflict with that forgiveness message, IMHO.

[Lindsey · Rating 3 out of 5]

A quick read that I was drawn to because I love adoption reunion stories.

[Kristen · Rating 2 out of 5]

This book held my attention and was a decent memoir, but I was very disappointed when the author brought her god into the story and got up on her high horse for not having an abortion.

[Diane · Rating 1 out of 5]

Good grief. This reads like something written by a young teenager, but at least made me swear never to say “not so much” ever again.

I was adopted, and had many of the insecurities that go along with it, but these people wallow in them. Diane repeatedly blabbers about how she loved her poisonous, despicable mother, but is so obsessed by the memory of the baby she was forced to give up, she sabotages other relationships. Steve, who had a wonderful life, with a loving, accepting family, drones on and on about not sharing DNA with them. I get it, to a degree, but the notion that blood makes one’s place within a family more meaningful, somehow, is preposterous. Diane’s own family was so dysfunctional, being adopted by wolves would have been a better option. He may have gotten his questions answered, but the relationship that developed between these two was tiresome to even read of.

[Amanda · Rating 1 out of 5]

I think I went in with higher expectations or thoughts of what this book would focus on. I thought it would be either a feel good story or a heart wrenching story about adoption and the emotions attached. Instead the author seemed to focus on everything horrible in her life, add in a whole lot of opinions and self pity, write like a teenager and even Steve’s account felt left field for me.

I’m the beginning my heart went out to the author. Being forced to give up a child you desperately want, I couldn’t imagine. But then the author seemed to spiral on about other poor life decisions and the focus shifted to all of her other hardships, not connecting in any way to the adoption.
The part she said that suicidal people are the most selfish- actually made me pause and debate on finishing. She’s explaining a mentally challenging situation in her life where she was prepared to end her life and she even describes how she had made preparations for her dogs, her youngest son (since it’d hit him hard) and so on and so on. She seems to contradict her belief of suicidal people are selfish by explaining everything she did to make sure things were taken care of. I understand opinions vary on suicide but that was extreme.
She explains how she never had a loving and meaningful relationship yet her second husband married her knowing she didn’t love him even stating he had enough love for both of them. She seemed to be the person who never gave anyone in her life love but complained that she never experienced it. When she shows ways she did? I couldn’t.

And Steve’s point of view to say that his childhood and relatives were all fake and pretending. Hmmm I didn’t like that. He says he had a great childhood and yet describes it as fake. I’m sure his adoptive family loved him, as the author even expresses, and nothing was fake for them. I couldn’t get over the way he thought about it.

And then it seemed the author was more “obsessed” with Steve and their relationship versus any of her other children- I just couldn’t. I am going to try to find another book about adoption because this one was not one for me or one I would recommend to anyone.

[my.bookshelf.87 · Rating 4 out of 5]

A real-life account of one woman's experience into giving up her firstborn son for adoption. Told in alternating narratives from the biological mother and son's perspectives. Insightful, honest and surprising at points, this was a quick and easy read.

[Toni · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book was good. Though it did have some slow spots in it. Glad I read it though. And I definitely recommend it.

[Meg GlitteryOtters · Rating 4 out of 5]

3.5 stars

[Michelle · Rating 2 out of 5]

This was an amazing story of the reunion of mother and son. It was a quick read but I found the writing style not great.

[Jan Cole · Rating 3 out of 5]

One Perfect Day is a new nonfiction release from romance writer Diane Burke and her first born son whom she placed for adoption when he was born. This is a quick read, told in alternate points of view. It was interesting although I felt Burke had many wide mood swings throughout her life and never really had taken the time or sought help to understand herself and work through feelings. She pretty much had to release her son for adoption and bitterly regretted it, but continued to flail blindly through life finally marrying a man who she described as her "best friend" who supported and encouraged her to get an education so she would be financially stable, encouraged her to write and was thrilled when she achieved success but she stated several times she didn't love him. However, she grieved terribly when he died. I didn't feel she understood what true love was and didn't possess the introspection to look at her situation and understand how loved she had been.

Her son had a good relationship with his adoptive parents (still does) and had a very happy childhood and a wonderful marriage and family. Yet like most adoptees, he felt a missing piece and was encouraged to search for his birth mother by his wife and daughter.

The reunion was a mountain top experience and they both realized that while they were biologically connected, they didn't know one another. At the time of this book, they were forging a relationship.

All in all it was a good book and I zipped through it. The book was lacking in depth in many places and there were two glaring grammatical errors that stopped me in my tracks and the photographs included were vaguely labeled. I thought the editor should have paid more attention. I would certainly recommend this to people interested in adoption reunion stories.

[Amanda Hewitt-Park · Rating 1 out of 5]

This was an irritating memoir. The author made a personal decision to maintain her pregnancy, although she was left with no other alternative as she was so far progressed before her mother worked out what was going on. I find it a weird decision to just keep progressing without discussing it with those around her. Where was her plan? And that was the constant theme of the book for me. Life decisions made that had monumental impacts on those around her. I’m not sure if the impacts of her actions were ever considered from the point of view of those she was closest to. As a relative of hers, I would have found this memoir disrespectful. However, it is her memoir, and therefore she has the right to tell her life story however she chooses. It’s just that I was unable to relate to her, her actions and her thought processes following those actions.

I would have liked to hear the opinions of those that lived with her, I am sure they would have provided a different perspective to what was portrayed in the book.

I’m still pleased I read this book. It gave an insight to how people make life decisions and the massive repercussions it has for everyone radiating around that person. A good life lesson on how decisions and being accountable decide the path that your life takes.

To read about how “God” was the reason for the anything good happening in her life, cemented for me that the author struggled with accountability and relied on an invisible man in the sky to take control. It further added to my irritation with this book. Lose the god bothering. Mind you, I guess that is to be expected when the author has been raised Catholic.

I’m still thankful that both the author and the adopted son were generous enough to share their story. However, for me, I was unable to connect with the Mum.

[Heidi | Paper Safari Book Blog]

Diane placed her son for adoption when she was teenager. She didn't have a choice as many women didn't back then. She was shipped off to a home for unwed mothers and told she just needed to act like nothing happened after she delivered. Of course that wasn't as easy as it sounds. Years later she gets a phone call from someone asking if she placed a baby several years ago and after the initial shock she found her heart wasn't missing a piece anymore.

While Diane’s story is tragic and difficult, Steve her now grown son had a very different life. In fact he had a very good life and didn't decide to search until later in life. Steve’s story really touches on the need to feel connected and have closure. Meeting his birth mother helped him with that.

I've read a lot of adoption and reunion stories and this one was tough. Diane's family was less than supportive when it came to the adoption and even when it came to getting out of her dysfunctional marriage. Diane is a brave and courageous woman who has overcome so much.

[Mimi · Rating 3 out of 5]

During the 1970's the author, Diane Burke, became pregnant as an unwed teen. She knew her boyfriend wouldn't marry her and at that time in history having a child out of wedlock was frowned upon. She didn't want an abortion so her parents said she must give her baby up for adoption. She was sent to a home for unwed mothers where she stayed until the baby was born, adopted out, and she had healed. She then returned home as though nothing had happened. No one in the family spoke about what had happened. Eventually, Burke got married and had two more children but never forgot her firstborn child. One fateful day her first born child reached out to her. You will have to read the book to see how their reunion transpired. This story was interesting but Burke spent a lot of space making us feel sorry for her and discussing how much her mom hated her but favored her sister. I felt that detracted from the main story line.

[Leigh Duncan · Rating 5 out of 5]

One Perfect Day is a compelling story of adoption told through the oft-overlooked eyes of a woman forced to give up her first-born child. Diane Burke bares her soul in this heart-wrenching journey of love, painful mistakes, forgiveness and joyous reunions. A powerful story, beautifully told.

[Amanda · Rating 3 out of 5]

Ok. Probably wouldn't have continued if it weren't an adoption memoir. Lots of fate / god, etc themes and some repetition of the same stories (and overuse of similar words and phrases). I enjoyed Steve's descriptions most.

[Colette · Rating 3 out of 5]

I love adoption stories. This was just ok. Wasn't crazy about the author for various reasons I won't get into.

[Julia · Rating 2 out of 5]

I appreciated this story of adoption reunification. I was drawn to the book because I am currently pregnant through donor conception, and one day—when my daughter turns 18—she will have the opportunity to learn about her biological father and potentially make contact. While there is a significant difference between these two situations—a mother giving birth and placing her child for adoption versus using a sperm donor—it was interesting to read about what reunification can look like and what it can mean for those involved.

That said, the book was lacking in structure and style. It’s written in a colloquial way, and some sentences are not complete sentences. Rather, phrases. (See what I did there?) I generally prefer a more polished writing style, and I believe better writing could have conveyed greater emotional depth. The shifts between the mother’s and son’s perspectives also made the story feel disjointed.

I can imagine this book lending itself well to an audiobook format, but on the page, the informality detracted from the impact. I also found the overt religiosity limiting; a more measured approach might have broadened the book’s relatability for a diverse readership. Finally, while I respect that the author feels gratitude for not having had an abortion, it’s important to acknowledge that the decision is deeply personal—and for some, it may be the right one.

Despite these reservations, I remain grateful to have read this compelling account of a mother and son reunited against all odds.

[Jane · Rating 4 out of 5]

Adoption reunion is a very complex subject, filled with thoughts and emotions that most people cannot begin to understand.

The reunited mother and son who co-authored this book made a valiant attempt to get the reader to understand what they were feeling as they navigated their reunion. I have experienced adoption reunion, so I understood every feeling they were trying to convey.

The general non-adopted public will not. While this particular story is very compelling, it is impossible for a non-adopted person to comprehend how traumatic closed adoption is, both for the biological mother and the adoptee, from this particular book.

I urge people interested in this subject to read it, since it might serve as an introduction of sorts. I also suggest going further and reading more adoption reunion narratives that delve further into this uncharted, emotional territory.

[Jen KD · Rating 3 out of 5]

An eye opening account of how pregnancy of unwed mothers were handled not very long ago! The author was basically forced by her family to give her child up for adoption even though she wanted to keep the baby. She was given the option of foster placement, but the hurdles she faced to get the baby returned were seemingly impossible. More heartbreak and dysfunction followed, along with two more children she was able to keep. After years of searching, her surrendered “baby” finds her and they reunite.

The topic is interesting and is an emotional journey. I do think it was longer than it needed to be. Events were told multiple times from both mom’s and son’s perspective, causing it to feel a bit repetitive. I would recommend this to readers interested in reuniting adopted children with birth parents/families.

[Kaitlyn · Rating 4 out of 5]

Enjoyed the Perspective

If I’m being honest about the writing of the story, the first half was incredibly interesting and the last half was very slow.

But I gave the book 4 stars because it gave me a perspective that I’m very grateful for. My husband and I are currently in the process of becoming foster parents (open to adoption) and previous to this book, I never truly considered what pain, hurt, and loss would be involved with adoption. This book has helped me look at the parents of my children and remember that (for most) this is not how they wanted their lives to turn. It’s a reminder to the types of emotions are involved with adoption and reunion. It has helped me see this situation from a different angle which I am very happy about.

[Laura A · Rating 3 out of 5]

Really enjoyed this book and thought it was beautifully written. I enjoyed the perspectives from mother and son throughout. However, it disappointed me on a couple of things.

Firstly, I wish the point of conversion and salvation was in the book. Author states it is important to her, but it was not mentioned. ( I recommend Denise Wilson’s book, Seven Words You Never Want To Hear, if anyone has any doubts about their salvation).

Also, for a Christian author, it pained me to read several accounts of the Lord’s name taken in vain. I can’t understand how a Christian author would allow this in her work. Even if it happened, the book states at the start it is a memoir, meaning things would not be totally accurate, so this could have been avoided!

[Donna Frasor · Rating 3 out of 5]

A true life story about adoption, forgiveness, reunion, and hope. It is a fast read from alternate points of view from the Mom and adopted son. It revisits a time when unwed mothers were looked down upon and shun. I felt her pain and the anguish of unanswered questions of her son. Not the best of writing, but an honest and introspective account of the Mom's troubled life and the changes she experienced which she attributed to faith and God.

[El · Rating 1 out of 5]

The subject matter was potentially interesting (reunion of forcedly adopted child many years later) but this was so badly written that I lost all interest in it. The son's input was much more illuminating and it would have been a better book had he written the major part of it rather than the mother. In addition, the constant shoehorning of God into the text was grating and unnecessary. A shame because with tighter editing this could have been a very good work.

[Kerryn Forsyth · Rating 5 out of 5]

Jan Jackson's review below says it all. An amazingly frank true adoption/reunion story. The fears, life lessons, hurts and betrayals that faced Diane for 40 years after reluctantly having to give up her baby boy for adoption. Many of the family interactions and insecurities are laid out for the reader with further being hinted at which leaves the imagination rattled. I couldn't put it down.

[Carla · Rating 5 out of 5]

Diane Burke was forced to give up her baby 40 years ago. Heartbroken but she clumsily moved forward. She had pushed the pain back but 40 years later she receives a certified letter. Her first born son that she gave up for adoption was trying to connect with her.
Is it too late? Are they ready for the emotions that come with the reunion? Read and find out.
Enjoyed the read.

[Renata Sutton · Rating 5 out of 5]

loved the story
Thought the nurses could use a little bit more of an education, when it comes to adoption.
Until the mother signs the paperwork she has every right to see and hold HER child.
It is sad that not all reunions work out. The stress has to be unreal.

[Sandy Gudaitis · Rating 5 out of 5]

Although I don’t have any adoption experience I found the synopsis interesting.

It’s a great book ! A true honest memoir. I felt like an old friend or relative was telling me a story
Highly recommended.