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283 pages, Paperback
Published January 1, 1968
Black despair again. Impression of having fallen down an open manhole. I didn’t deserve this. I deserved (pride?) the “fine career” my teachers and friends predicted for me. Then suddenly, at the corner of that trench, the whiff of gas! The death-trap set by fate.
A fine little fellow, robust, promising grandly – with all the future, mine, the world’s, implicit in him. Since my first sight of him he has never left my thoughts, and the idea that I can’t be in his worries me preposterously. No, he will never have known me or anything about me; I leave next to nothing: a few photographs, a little money, and just a name, “Uncle Antoine.” Nothing. That thought’s unbearable at times.