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Boob Envy

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On my daughters 8th birthday in November 2010, at the age of 35, I was diagnosed with stage 3A Invasive Ductal Carcinoma. In normal-person-terms, that's breast cancer. It was advanced, aggressive, and scary as HELL. I had NO CLUE. I wasn't sick. I wasn't aware of it. I didn't have any sixth sense. When the lump was found-I mourned. I knew my life was going to go straight downhill. Quickly. Things moved so fast-within the week I was admitted to the hospital and was having a bilateral radical mastectomy. I had lymph nodes removed; I lost a chunk of my chest wall muscle; and worst of all I awoke without my double D's :(

After getting over 12,500 hits on my CaringBridge journal and MUCH encouragement from friends and family, here it is. The whole naked story. I want the whole world to know the hell of cancer, and raise AWARENESS. Inform EVERYONE I can and get it all off my chest. (Haha-literally!)

I found myself looking for ANY source of information for someone in my predicament-a married, young(ish) Mom of three kids, ages 8, 4, and 10. I work full time, I know NOTHING about breast cancer, I am lower middle class. I live in a small community and do not have the resources that exist in large cities. I read lots of books from celebrity stories to self-published non-fiction. I looked for support groups tailored for people my age...my stage of life. No luck. I searched the internet for sites that were a perfect 'fit'. Found maaaaaaybe one. Possibly two. But nothing "WOW! That's me!"

I have been subjected to MUCH pain and agony...and have been scared shitless. But I came through the other side. I’m still HERE. This book will hopefully shed some light on the whole breast cancer experience for other women. I tell all the grim details.... from my mammogram diagnosis (holy FUCK---are they SURE????) all the way through to my new foobies {fake boobies}. I am 100% honest in my accounts, and hold NOTHING back. There is a lot of "too much information" and a lot of make-you-squirm. In it I discuss every test I had. Every procedure I had. Every medicine I tried. Every side effect. Everyday life while living with my cancer. If I can help/inform/give peace of mind to at least ONE person....then I went through this hell for a reason.

My name is Shelly, and I am a SURVIVOR. Now I know what you're thinking....oh, cripes...another annoying breast cancer survivor-telling us all to support the cause, race for the cure, blah blah blah-blah-blah. Well, not quite. Actually...not at all. I am a normal woman, from a normal city in Wisconsin, with a very abnormal family, dealing with REAL LIFE struggles. I'm not famous (yet! lol) and I do not have a sugar coated story to tell about how going through cancer really changed my life for the better or how I am just so thankful to have had this horrible thing happen to me. F*CK THAT.

I am the Mom of three (count them T-H-R-E-E) kids, two of which are high maintenance…forget that….all THREE of them are high maintenance! Throw in some autism and some celiac disease and some ADHD….and THEY ARE cRaZy!!!!! As you can imagine life on a normal basis is hectic, but once we added cancer to the mix....holy balls. Routine went right out the window. Parenting went right out the window. Survival became the day to day focus. Finding the strength to feed them or make meals; finding the strength to guide or discipline; asking for help with the things I was physically unable to do. i.e. driving the kids to school; grocery shopping; helping the kids with their homework...all impossible.

Luckily, I am married to my best friend, Andy, and have been since 1999. We have been together over half of our lives already. No small feat, since we're only 37! We have lived through and survived so many obstacles. You'll have to read the damn book to find out what they are! Anyhow-there is absolutely NO WAY I could have gotten through the last few years without him. He has picked up when I was unable to go on. He has been SO STRONG...for me, the kids, our family, our friends. He took over as a single parent in our house when all I could do was lay in bed for days on end.

See, not only am I a cancer survivor.....I made it through LIFE during cancer, and THAT folks is a freakin' miracle. That is the true definition of a survivor.
...so f*ck off and DIE cancer. I'm DONE with you.

430 pages, Kindle Edition

First published January 1, 2013

7 people are currently reading
332 people want to read

About the author

Shelly (Knowlton) Jones

1 book6 followers

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5 stars
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3 (9%)
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Displaying 1 - 6 of 6 reviews
Profile Image for Angelique.
320 reviews16 followers
April 8, 2013
Let me start off by saying, I do not read auto biographies. I don’t read non fiction, and generally tend to stay away from real life, based on real life and reality of all kind. I am a blissfully ignorant kind of person and completely proud of it.
Ms Jones contacted me to read her book, and as we had recently lost a family friend to breast cancer I felt the need to read it and share it with everyone. I am really glad I took her up on her offer. It is a heart warming, real life story. It is completely graphic in its details and 100% honest. It was sad, depressing and down right dark. It was hopeful, full of love and completely inspiring.
The book takes the format of the author’s online diary as she experiences all the ups and downs of juggling breast cancer, losing her boobies (so sad), family life, bills, her husband and all the things that life threw at her. You laugh with her, and cry with her. I got goosies so many times my fiancé thought he needed to switch off the aircon. Such a well written account that made it really hard to stop reading.
It helped me open up my eyes. It made me do the whole breast examination (which I am ashamed to admit, I have NEVER done before).
If your young, ignorant and blissfully unaware of what life can throw at you, read it. You need to wake up, just like I did.
Thank you for sharing your story with us Shelly.

As a side note. I don’t really know who out there follows me, and reads what I write. If anyone should be on the South Coast of KZN on April the 20th please come and join us for the Annual Cansa walk. It is from 5pm to 5am behind the Norwegian Settler’s church at the sports grounds.

For more reviews please check out my blog on
http://whyicantstopreading.wordpress....
Profile Image for Jackie.
11 reviews1 follower
December 6, 2014
I won this book from the Good Reads website.
The book is written as Shelley Jones blog and diary she kept through her journey of being a breast cancer patient.It even has actual comments from her blog included, which to me often didn't add much to the story . I found myself skipping most of those. She is a hilarious writer, just read the letter to the reader in the book. I laughed out loud in a lot of places, and then the next moment was crying my eyes out.I even had to put it down for a day because it touched me too deeply.
This is the story of one woman's journey through the battleground of cancer. It is NOTHING like any other cancer survivor's book that I have read to date. This book tells the truth about the whole battle- the money issues, fears, other people's reactions, and even the real pain when the doctor says "You will feel a slight pinch." The book also is extremely informative about all the procedures, tests, and medical terminology that a cancer diagnosis brings. This should be handed out to all breast cancer patients. I believe it would help a lot of other women going through the minefield of a cancer diagnosis.
Profile Image for Lisa Collins.
48 reviews3 followers
September 9, 2013
I won this book on goodreads. Thanks ! Shelly's story is written from the heart. It is an emotional read for me not because I ever had cancer but because I really identify with her. She is a mother, wife and friend and it really shows what a caring but kick ass woman she is. All three of her kids were born at the same time as mine were born and I had some of the same things happen in my life that have happened to her. I really am enjoying this book. This is a story that I think a lot of woman can identify with and a lot of woman will enjoy the style in which it is written. Thanks Shelly !
Profile Image for Lynn.
4 reviews
April 22, 2014
In January of 2000, I lost my only sibling, my older sister, to breast cancer...everyday is a challenge and a chance to laugh. Shelly hits both those nails on the head in this delightful, insightful read. Thank you Shelly for sharing your journey and keeping us apprised of the realities of this disease!
138 reviews3 followers
May 22, 2015
The reason I gave this book 2 stars is because there were a lot of parts that I just had to skim over. The book is written in a blog style where some of the posts are Shelly's and the rest are family, friends and supporters. While it is wonderful that she had so much support throughout this awful battle, I didn't find that hearing from all those other people did very much for this book.
I did enjoy reading the posts from Shelly because it is her story and what cancer was to her. I did learn a lot and discussed some of the procedures with my own Mother (a cancer survivor herself). While I was an adult when my Mother battled cancer, there were a lot of things I didn't know about. When I asked her about the tissue expanders, she told me that yes indeed it was the most painful thing she ever experienced in her life. I think this is a good book for women fighting breast cancer because it does tell you honestly what it will be like and she also gives a few helpful websites as well. I would just skip all the other things.
Displaying 1 - 6 of 6 reviews

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