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無償の愛情で救われる人間を描き、「ダ・ヴィンチ」誌上でBL界の芥川賞と評された傑作！
痴漢の冤罪で実刑判決を受けた堂野。収監されたくせ者ばかりの雑居房で人間不信極まった堂野は、同部屋の喜多川の無垢な優しさに救われる。それは母親に請われるまま殺人犯として服役する喜多川の、生まれて初めての「愛情」だった。
『箱の中』に加え、二人の出所後を描いた『檻の外』表題作を収録した決定版。
●箱の中
●脆弱な詐欺師
●檻の外
※本書は2006年3月に蒼竜社より刊行されたノベルス版『箱の中』と、同年5月に刊行されたノベルス版『檻の外』表題作を、『箱の中』として一冊にまとめたものです。
痴漢の冤罪で実刑判決を受けた堂野。収監されたくせ者ばかりの雑居房で人間不信極まった堂野は、同部屋の喜多川の無垢な優しさに救われる。それは母親に請われるまま殺人犯として服役する喜多川の、生まれて初めての「愛情」だった。
『箱の中』に加え、二人の出所後を描いた『檻の外』表題作を収録した決定版。
●箱の中
●脆弱な詐欺師
●檻の外
※本書は2006年3月に蒼竜社より刊行されたノベルス版『箱の中』と、同年5月に刊行されたノベルス版『檻の外』表題作を、『箱の中』として一冊にまとめたものです。
456 pages, Paperback
First published May 25, 2006
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100 people want to read
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 45 reviews
September 26, 2013
Originally at Scrollin' Them Papers
For starter, this is a japanese BL novel by Konohara Narise. This book is a reprint edition containing just the main stories.You wouldn't believe just how much I love the cover. guh. There are actually three separate novels published in 2006 which include the short stories in chronological order.
This book is simple and doesn't have much in the plot department, instead, it floods you with all the feels and inner monologues there are. Douno as an MC is bland and is the most average of the Joes out there. He is self-righteous and wallows in self-pity a lot. They are precedented of course as I think he's one of those who have the worst luck ever. Until Kitagawa that is.
The first story tells you about their meeting and covers the length of Douno's stay in the prison. Here, he meets Kitagawa, a young man with a reputation of a psychotic killer. A guy who barely says anything at all, a guy who asks for rewards, a guy who is basically a Man Child. My heart aches for him and his pure way of loving Douno.
The second story is told in the POV of a private investigator a few years after their release from the prison. While I don't care for him at all, it gives us a third eye-view at the Kitagawa and his determination at finding his love again.
The last story dwells in their reunion. Figuring how Kitagawa fits in a new life that Douno has built. And again, Douno's inner turmoil. Sigh.
While the settings and characters here fall together nicely and conveniently, this book is dark in a very realistic way. It is cynic and has lies, cons and manipulations in spades. I wish I could say I felt disbelief and skeptical while reading, but I didn't and that's one of the reasons why I like this book so much.
For starter, this is a japanese BL novel by Konohara Narise. This book is a reprint edition containing just the main stories.
This book is simple and doesn't have much in the plot department, instead, it floods you with all the feels and inner monologues there are. Douno as an MC is bland and is the most average of the Joes out there. He is self-righteous and wallows in self-pity a lot. They are precedented of course as I think he's one of those who have the worst luck ever. Until Kitagawa that is.
The first story tells you about their meeting and covers the length of Douno's stay in the prison. Here, he meets Kitagawa, a young man with a reputation of a psychotic killer. A guy who barely says anything at all, a guy who asks for rewards, a guy who is basically a Man Child. My heart aches for him and his pure way of loving Douno.
“I love you, Takafumi, but―”
He looked up.
“It hurts to be in love, doesn’t it?” Kitagawa said. “Takafumi, do I have to feel like this the whole time I’m in love with you?”
The second story is told in the POV of a private investigator a few years after their release from the prison. While I don't care for him at all, it gives us a third eye-view at the Kitagawa and his determination at finding his love again.
“We won’t be able to take your case, Mr. Kitagawa. What will you do next?”
“I’ll ask another detective.”
“Even if you ask another agency, I don’t think they’ll find him.”
“That’s fine. It gives me peace of mind to have someone out there searching.”
The last story dwells in their reunion. Figuring how Kitagawa fits in a new life that Douno has built. And again, Douno's inner turmoil. Sigh.
“What can I do to make my love disappear?”
While the settings and characters here fall together nicely and conveniently, this book is dark in a very realistic way. It is cynic and has lies, cons and manipulations in spades. I wish I could say I felt disbelief and skeptical while reading, but I didn't and that's one of the reasons why I like this book so much.
August 27, 2015
I like BL and I like prison stories so I thought this story would be right up my alley when I found the fan translation for this. The first three or four chapters were okay, but after that I became really uncomfortable with how one-sided and non-consensual the relationship between Douno and Kitagawa turned out. The whole thing just kept getting creepier and creepier when they got out of prison, and I'm still not sure if the story was meant to be seen as romantic or not. To me it wasn't very romantic, especially because Kitagawa was 1) super stalker-ish and 2) on the emotional level of a child. That took a lot of enjoyment away from the sex scenes as well: having sex with someone who's essentially a five-year-old in a grown man's body doesn't sound too hot to me..... I was also bothered by the fact that every single female character in the story turned out to be either dishonest, shallow, foolish or crazy. And I think using the death of a child as a plot twist is always really cheap.
I guess I enjoyed the parts about prison life the most, but I don't think this book is a 100% credible source for the penalty system in Japan so idk what I really got out of this in the end. At least I was entertained for one weekend, I guess that's good enough for two stars.
I guess I enjoyed the parts about prison life the most, but I don't think this book is a 100% credible source for the penalty system in Japan so idk what I really got out of this in the end. At least I was entertained for one weekend, I guess that's good enough for two stars.
September 8, 2024
Haven't possibly cried so much in months, or even years. Enjoyed the story but unfortunately did not like the second hand trauma I got as a bonus.
December 28, 2015
Hôm nay tình cờ nghe được Cái giá của tình yêu (http://mp3.zing.vn/bai-hat/Cai-Gia-Cu...) đột nhiên nghĩ tới bèn giở ra đọc lại ._____. đoạn Kei mất ý mà .____.
August 31, 2025
3.5
I don't know what to say... This starts a certain way and then the story goes into a completely unexpected direction. I enjoyed the first part a lot and then the last part the least. There are a lot of creepy things to this Kitagawa character as well and I'm usually all for it but I don't know, it ended up not being enjoyable to me.
I was thinking this was going to be a 5-star rating to be honest but the story degraded so much by the last part that I can't help it but give it 3.5 stars instead.
I don't know what to say... This starts a certain way and then the story goes into a completely unexpected direction. I enjoyed the first part a lot and then the last part the least. There are a lot of creepy things to this Kitagawa character as well and I'm usually all for it but I don't know, it ended up not being enjoyable to me.
I was thinking this was going to be a 5-star rating to be honest but the story degraded so much by the last part that I can't help it but give it 3.5 stars instead.
April 12, 2017
Kitagawa có nói một câu thế này:
Tôi chẳng biết phải review thế nào cho phải vì với mớ ngôn từ hạn hẹp của mình, tôi có sắp thế nào cũng thấy là không đủ, không xứng. Nhưng không viết gì rồi cứ lặng lẽ cho 5 sao thì tôi lại không thể, chắc vì nó khiến tôi thấy như đang phụ lại một thứ quan trọng vậy.
Cái câu tôi trích ở trên, nói là thích nhất thì không phải. Chỉ là khi đọc đến nó, tôi đã nghĩ ngay đến Jack và một trong những câu nói tôi tâm đắc nhất trong Brokeback Mountain, cái câu đầy bất lực "I wish I knew how to quit you" .
Nếu tính cả đam mỹ thì truyện tôi đọc về tình yêu giữa nam giới cũng kha khá. Nhưng đến giờ mới chỉ Brokeback Mountain và giờ thêm Trong ngục - Ngoài lao là có thể tác động đến tôi nhiều vậy. Đều đau, đều đẹp. Không phải kiểu đẹp hào nhoáng, mà cái đẹp toả ra từ điều cơ bản nhất của tình yêu, chỉ là hai con người khát khao được ở bên nhau mà thôi.
Bản dịch tôi đọc là của BeniBeni, đoạn trích ở trên và cả tên tác phẩm Trong ngục - Ngoài lao cũng là công sức của bạn ấy cả. Thật sự cảm ơn bạn rất nhiều. Lần đầu tiếp xúc với tác phẩm của sensei mà lại được thông qua một bản dịch tốt như vậy, hẳn đã là một đặc ân.
"Ngay từ đầu tôi đã là thứ chẳng ai cần rồi. Có sống hay là chết cũng được. Chỉ là, không hiểu sao mỗi mình anh cứ muốn áp đặt cho tôi một ý nghĩa. Thế nên tôi cứ để tâm đến anh suốt."
Tôi chẳng biết phải review thế nào cho phải vì với mớ ngôn từ hạn hẹp của mình, tôi có sắp thế nào cũng thấy là không đủ, không xứng. Nhưng không viết gì rồi cứ lặng lẽ cho 5 sao thì tôi lại không thể, chắc vì nó khiến tôi thấy như đang phụ lại một thứ quan trọng vậy.
Cái câu tôi trích ở trên, nói là thích nhất thì không phải. Chỉ là khi đọc đến nó, tôi đã nghĩ ngay đến Jack và một trong những câu nói tôi tâm đắc nhất trong Brokeback Mountain, cái câu đầy bất lực "I wish I knew how to quit you" .
Nếu tính cả đam mỹ thì truyện tôi đọc về tình yêu giữa nam giới cũng kha khá. Nhưng đến giờ mới chỉ Brokeback Mountain và giờ thêm Trong ngục - Ngoài lao là có thể tác động đến tôi nhiều vậy. Đều đau, đều đẹp. Không phải kiểu đẹp hào nhoáng, mà cái đẹp toả ra từ điều cơ bản nhất của tình yêu, chỉ là hai con người khát khao được ở bên nhau mà thôi.
Bản dịch tôi đọc là của BeniBeni, đoạn trích ở trên và cả tên tác phẩm Trong ngục - Ngoài lao cũng là công sức của bạn ấy cả. Thật sự cảm ơn bạn rất nhiều. Lần đầu tiếp xúc với tác phẩm của sensei mà lại được thông qua một bản dịch tốt như vậy, hẳn đã là một đặc ân.
January 20, 2016
I would have given this book a much lower score. The last part of the book, however— all the turmoil that came after the "happily ever after" scenario where most books end, that was the part that made me feel glad I read this.
At first I didn't know how to feel about the protagonists, neither were particularly endearing and Kitagawa's initial pushy behaviour irked me at times. As pages were flipped, this book showed me many sides to its characters so I could grow to like them. Though the plot isn't all that original or marvellous, the emotional rollercoasters were handled with superb hindsight. My heart beat in empathy. I'm glad I read this book for the kind of books that move you, make you think and feel through their characters are the ones that stay with you after all.
At first I didn't know how to feel about the protagonists, neither were particularly endearing and Kitagawa's initial pushy behaviour irked me at times. As pages were flipped, this book showed me many sides to its characters so I could grow to like them. Though the plot isn't all that original or marvellous, the emotional rollercoasters were handled with superb hindsight. My heart beat in empathy. I'm glad I read this book for the kind of books that move you, make you think and feel through their characters are the ones that stay with you after all.
May 3, 2015
This book...
I loved it
It was not a beautiful book all along. It had really problematic behaviors from one of the characters and at times it seemed a little creepy. But he learned. Even thought he was a little child at heart he became such an amazing person, how he managed to give such great lessons about life at the end was what made me give this book the fifth star.
I read it in less than a day but I ended up really emotionally invested in this book.
I loved it
It was not a beautiful book all along. It had really problematic behaviors from one of the characters and at times it seemed a little creepy. But he learned. Even thought he was a little child at heart he became such an amazing person, how he managed to give such great lessons about life at the end was what made me give this book the fifth star.
I read it in less than a day but I ended up really emotionally invested in this book.
October 20, 2016
This novel made me a bit uncomfortable at first but the writing drew me in.
The sidestories "Rainy Day", "Field of Silver Grass", and "Summer Vacation" especially take the story to the next level. I definitely recommend reading them after the main story! (Be fair warned they may induce both happy and sad tears).
The sidestories "Rainy Day", "Field of Silver Grass", and "Summer Vacation" especially take the story to the next level. I definitely recommend reading them after the main story! (Be fair warned they may induce both happy and sad tears).
September 21, 2024
Wow, that was something. Hours after finishing, I'm still reeling from the ending. Anyway here are my thoughts:
I think Narise Konohara's choice to make Takafumi's false conviction be sexual harassment is an interesting one. It sure is a loaded one - considering most victims are never believed/get told it was their fault, and their attackers never punished/get off with a light sentence. But I think it highlights well how corrupted the police + the justice system are (which is unfortunately universal). I thought the way Takafumi describes the accusation years later in Out of the Cage compared to how it was for him in In the Box was a really interesting choice, which I enjoyed; You can see his overwhelming resentment for the victim (because she did get harassed, just not by Takafumi) rightfully transfer over to the police for not doing their jobs correctly. Takafumi's journey in prison was also interesting - while I don't necessarily agree with some portrayals of those incarcerated, I think it's a very realistic view of how the everyday person (especially one that has been falsely convicted) would think about those in prison and being around them. I hope Takafumi must have realized that he really lucked out on his cellies (aside from the scammer lol) because it could have been way worse for him if they were both hostile and homophobic.
Kei and Takafumi's relationship start out pretty naturally and sort of sweet, but it does get rough near the end of In the Box. Your noncon/rape warning is here, and I appreciate how Narise Konohara was direct at calling it what it was instead of romanticizing it. Of course, if this was real life, I would recommend NEVER getting with your rapist for obvious reasons, but this is a story lol. Kei is so interesting as a character. He was never loved or socialized as a child, so he's not neurotypical. He doesn't view his actions as wrong because he doesn't understand - but he eventually learns. His journey in The Fragile Swindler is so goddamn depressing. It's heart wrenching. I have to admit it did make me tear up. I also loved Shiba in this; He was great, I'm really glad he was there to help Kei.
Out of the Cage is...yeesh. The moment In the Box ended with Takafumi getting a wife and kid, I hoped Narise Konohara wouldn't do the classic (misogynistic) dead wife trope. Well! Was I in for a melodrama! Rough. Anyway, I think Takafumi's inner feelings was a decent portrayal of internalized homophobia. He wanted to pick up Kei at the end of In the Box, but was afraid of the idea of being with him forever. It was both something he could not commit to due to his marriage, but also because thinking of himself as queer was not something he wanted to admit to. The way he sat back down and cried says a lot. It was interesting to see him both fight against the idea of being involved with Kei, but wanting Kei in his life despite knowing that Kei couldn't let him go. But also interesting to see how Takafumi really just ignored all the negative & telling signs from his wife. He really held on to the heterosexual nuclear family dream for as long as he could. I think Narise Konohara's choice in the violent destruction of the nuclear family being the only way Takafumi could ever be with Kei says a lot about Takafumi's internalized homophobia. It's "out of the cage," not "out of the box" - the cage here being the repression of queerness and heteronormative expectations.
Kei is devoted and depressing throughout all of this. Absolutely having the worse time of his life, but honestly sometimes being unexpectedly funny. I will note here the hand-in-marriage promise by Kei was really weird as hell, but also acknowledge that it was done out of desperation to be in Takafumi's life and warm home as much as he could (+ his nontypical thinking patterns). You could really feel his loneliness and desperation.
Rainy Day is my favorite side story. It's just Kei and Takafumi finally being able to love each other freely and being domestic together. It's really so sweet, I wished it lasted longer.
Field of Silver Grass is a lovely look at Kei and Takafumi when they're older. I love old man yaoi fr..... and I'm glad to see Takafumi coming out to his family, and that he took Kei with him to visit his mother. Unfortunately, the build up to Summer Vacation was actually so heinous.
Summer Vacation is about Nao (Takafumi's not quite son) coming to visit him and Kei during his summers. It is so so sweet to know that Takafumi and Kei got to be parents, however brief. Thinking about it kind of makes me emotional if I'm honest. Which makes the ending of Summer Vacation actually so heinous..............Narise Konohara when I catch you fr.............
Overall, Hako no Naka / In the Box was an emotional rollercoaster. Was it the absolute best writing and plot? No. But I enjoyed it nonetheless.
I think Narise Konohara's choice to make Takafumi's false conviction be sexual harassment is an interesting one. It sure is a loaded one - considering most victims are never believed/get told it was their fault, and their attackers never punished/get off with a light sentence. But I think it highlights well how corrupted the police + the justice system are (which is unfortunately universal). I thought the way Takafumi describes the accusation years later in Out of the Cage compared to how it was for him in In the Box was a really interesting choice, which I enjoyed; You can see his overwhelming resentment for the victim (because she did get harassed, just not by Takafumi) rightfully transfer over to the police for not doing their jobs correctly. Takafumi's journey in prison was also interesting - while I don't necessarily agree with some portrayals of those incarcerated, I think it's a very realistic view of how the everyday person (especially one that has been falsely convicted) would think about those in prison and being around them. I hope Takafumi must have realized that he really lucked out on his cellies (aside from the scammer lol) because it could have been way worse for him if they were both hostile and homophobic.
Kei and Takafumi's relationship start out pretty naturally and sort of sweet, but it does get rough near the end of In the Box. Your noncon/rape warning is here, and I appreciate how Narise Konohara was direct at calling it what it was instead of romanticizing it. Of course, if this was real life, I would recommend NEVER getting with your rapist for obvious reasons, but this is a story lol. Kei is so interesting as a character. He was never loved or socialized as a child, so he's not neurotypical. He doesn't view his actions as wrong because he doesn't understand - but he eventually learns. His journey in The Fragile Swindler is so goddamn depressing. It's heart wrenching. I have to admit it did make me tear up. I also loved Shiba in this; He was great, I'm really glad he was there to help Kei.
Out of the Cage is...yeesh. The moment In the Box ended with Takafumi getting a wife and kid, I hoped Narise Konohara wouldn't do the classic (misogynistic) dead wife trope. Well! Was I in for a melodrama! Rough. Anyway, I think Takafumi's inner feelings was a decent portrayal of internalized homophobia. He wanted to pick up Kei at the end of In the Box, but was afraid of the idea of being with him forever. It was both something he could not commit to due to his marriage, but also because thinking of himself as queer was not something he wanted to admit to. The way he sat back down and cried says a lot. It was interesting to see him both fight against the idea of being involved with Kei, but wanting Kei in his life despite knowing that Kei couldn't let him go. But also interesting to see how Takafumi really just ignored all the negative & telling signs from his wife. He really held on to the heterosexual nuclear family dream for as long as he could. I think Narise Konohara's choice in the violent destruction of the nuclear family being the only way Takafumi could ever be with Kei says a lot about Takafumi's internalized homophobia. It's "out of the cage," not "out of the box" - the cage here being the repression of queerness and heteronormative expectations.
Kei is devoted and depressing throughout all of this. Absolutely having the worse time of his life, but honestly sometimes being unexpectedly funny. I will note here the hand-in-marriage promise by Kei was really weird as hell, but also acknowledge that it was done out of desperation to be in Takafumi's life and warm home as much as he could (+ his nontypical thinking patterns). You could really feel his loneliness and desperation.
Rainy Day is my favorite side story. It's just Kei and Takafumi finally being able to love each other freely and being domestic together. It's really so sweet, I wished it lasted longer.
Field of Silver Grass is a lovely look at Kei and Takafumi when they're older. I love old man yaoi fr..... and I'm glad to see Takafumi coming out to his family, and that he took Kei with him to visit his mother. Unfortunately, the build up to Summer Vacation was actually so heinous.
Summer Vacation is about Nao (Takafumi's not quite son) coming to visit him and Kei during his summers. It is so so sweet to know that Takafumi and Kei got to be parents, however brief. Thinking about it kind of makes me emotional if I'm honest. Which makes the ending of Summer Vacation actually so heinous..............Narise Konohara when I catch you fr.............
Overall, Hako no Naka / In the Box was an emotional rollercoaster. Was it the absolute best writing and plot? No. But I enjoyed it nonetheless.
June 29, 2016
I cried the entire last chapter. And the ending was so brilliant and poignant it just wrapped up everything back to the beginning.
Warning: Sad!!!! ;_; ;_; ;_;
Warning: Sad!!!! ;_; ;_; ;_;
June 7, 2019
2.5/5
July 27, 2024
Wow. This was such a poignant read.
A love story that spanned decades. At first I thought that Douno (MC) and Kitagawa (ML) would end up having an ill fated relationship, with how Kitagawa and his one-sided feelings clung onto Douno while they were in prison. I felt bad for Douno but I felt worse for Kitagawa because Kitagawa was abused by his own mother, framed as a murderer, and lived his whole life without knowing the warmth of another human, and he didn’t know the difference between right and wrong. He latched onto Douno, the only person who had shown him kindness and thanked him, and what they had wasn’t a real relationship. At least to Douno it wasn’t, because he was a kind person who wanted to pay back Kitagawa somehow for helping him. But to Kitagawa, the idea of seeing Douno again in the real world outside of the four prison walls became his motivation and his love for Douno fundamentally changed him as a person.
Their relationship was obviously frowned upon and because Douno was “normal”, he was more hesitant about reconnecting with Kitagawa after leaving prison. He was adamant that he wasn’t gay and for a while he lived a normal life with a wife and child. Kitagawa on the other hand, had no perception of what was normal and so he pursued Douno relentlessly. I was amazed at his persistence of looking for Douno for more than 4 years and it was such a relief for Kitagawa that he was finally able to meet Douno again. As you can expect, there was a good amount of angst as Douno and Kitagawa tried to draw the line in their relationship. Douno didn’t want Kitagawa to ruin his current normal life even though Kitagawa just wanted him all to himself. Eventually, unfortunately there was a death and an affair and all these made Douno realise that the person he truly loved and wanted to be with was Kitagawa. It was a crazy emotional experience for everyone involved.
I can’t even begin to articulate how much I enjoyed reading Kitagawa’s character growth, and he was my favourite character. From viewing human relationships as something transactional, to wanting to live on his own terms and learning to grow up in the process, to being a big hearted person who was loved by many, but especially by the one who mattered the most - Douno. He made a lot of mistakes and a lot of times he wasn’t exactly normal - for example, he wanted Douno to have another child so he could go ahead and die and get reincarnated as that child in order to be with Douno forever. Or that time where he said he would get together and start a family with Douno’s daughter after she turned 16 if she still liked him. You know, those weren’t things that normal people would say but Kitagawa didn’t give a fuck, not on purpose but because he truly didn’t know that he wasn’t supposed to say stuff like that.
In addition to that, I know that although Kitagawa didn’t mean to, he still sexually assaulted Douno several times before they officially got together which led to a lot of pain for Douno. Normally I wouldn’t be a fan of a relationship that has any SA but in this context, I could understand it happened because Kitagawa simply didn’t know that his actions equated to rape and that it was wrong, and in the end, Kitagawa made up for his atrocious love making skills to Douno. I loved the final 40% of the story, when they were both older men in their 50s and still incredibly in love with each other. I got to read about their daily lives filled with peace and I was so happy to find out that Kitagawa became an illustrator and his thinking was much more mature. The love they shared was stable, deep and warm, and after everything they had gone through, it was the happy ending that they deserved.
A love story that spanned decades. At first I thought that Douno (MC) and Kitagawa (ML) would end up having an ill fated relationship, with how Kitagawa and his one-sided feelings clung onto Douno while they were in prison. I felt bad for Douno but I felt worse for Kitagawa because Kitagawa was abused by his own mother, framed as a murderer, and lived his whole life without knowing the warmth of another human, and he didn’t know the difference between right and wrong. He latched onto Douno, the only person who had shown him kindness and thanked him, and what they had wasn’t a real relationship. At least to Douno it wasn’t, because he was a kind person who wanted to pay back Kitagawa somehow for helping him. But to Kitagawa, the idea of seeing Douno again in the real world outside of the four prison walls became his motivation and his love for Douno fundamentally changed him as a person.
Their relationship was obviously frowned upon and because Douno was “normal”, he was more hesitant about reconnecting with Kitagawa after leaving prison. He was adamant that he wasn’t gay and for a while he lived a normal life with a wife and child. Kitagawa on the other hand, had no perception of what was normal and so he pursued Douno relentlessly. I was amazed at his persistence of looking for Douno for more than 4 years and it was such a relief for Kitagawa that he was finally able to meet Douno again. As you can expect, there was a good amount of angst as Douno and Kitagawa tried to draw the line in their relationship. Douno didn’t want Kitagawa to ruin his current normal life even though Kitagawa just wanted him all to himself. Eventually, unfortunately there was a death and an affair and all these made Douno realise that the person he truly loved and wanted to be with was Kitagawa. It was a crazy emotional experience for everyone involved.
I can’t even begin to articulate how much I enjoyed reading Kitagawa’s character growth, and he was my favourite character. From viewing human relationships as something transactional, to wanting to live on his own terms and learning to grow up in the process, to being a big hearted person who was loved by many, but especially by the one who mattered the most - Douno. He made a lot of mistakes and a lot of times he wasn’t exactly normal - for example, he wanted Douno to have another child so he could go ahead and die and get reincarnated as that child in order to be with Douno forever. Or that time where he said he would get together and start a family with Douno’s daughter after she turned 16 if she still liked him. You know, those weren’t things that normal people would say but Kitagawa didn’t give a fuck, not on purpose but because he truly didn’t know that he wasn’t supposed to say stuff like that.
In addition to that, I know that although Kitagawa didn’t mean to, he still sexually assaulted Douno several times before they officially got together which led to a lot of pain for Douno. Normally I wouldn’t be a fan of a relationship that has any SA but in this context, I could understand it happened because Kitagawa simply didn’t know that his actions equated to rape and that it was wrong, and in the end, Kitagawa made up for his atrocious love making skills to Douno. I loved the final 40% of the story, when they were both older men in their 50s and still incredibly in love with each other. I got to read about their daily lives filled with peace and I was so happy to find out that Kitagawa became an illustrator and his thinking was much more mature. The love they shared was stable, deep and warm, and after everything they had gone through, it was the happy ending that they deserved.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
March 17, 2020
I started the book on the afternoon, when I have woken up and done my waking up routine. I was fine. The same politely indifferent person as I had always been.
I finished this book at 4am later. I was still the same politely indifferent person. But along the way, I had been interrupted from my reading (chores, ya know, and enforced religious to-dos), and that was when I had varying behaviours.
I finished this book at 4am later. I was still the same politely indifferent person. But along the way, I had been interrupted from my reading (chores, ya know, and enforced religious to-dos), and that was when I had varying behaviours.
October 7, 2020
I have read it twice, it is hard to read, if you like a lovely-Dovey BL, it is not for you.
At the first time, I had read it because the translator said i is the most successful works of the author with a lot of nominations and awards, as well as i just finished Uttsukushi Koto and I fall in love with her style.
For me, it is great work although the theme is dark and sensual. It made me cried some times while reading and there are some of the social problems addressed in this book.
Below is the short quotation that I really like ( SPOILER ALERT )
“Hey,” Kitagawa said, as Douno lay in his futon with his eyes closed. “Everyone says it’s weird, but I really used to think I wouldn’t mind living here for the rest of my life. Sometimes it can get too hot or too cold, but I never have to worry about having enough to eat. Even if I get out, I’d have nothing I want to do. But when I thought about how I could live with you―stick close to you all day long if I wanted, and never get in trouble for it―then I started wanting to go outside.”
“Even after you said you had a girlfriend, Takafumi, I’m always thinking and thinking. But no matter how much I think about it, I still want to be with you.”
“Takafumi, I’m always thinking of you. I think of you the moment I wake up until when I go to sleep. Does your girlfriend think of you as much as I do?”
“I don’t care if I get punished,” Kitagawa said emotionlessly. “I can’t think of anything else that might make you happy.”
Douno dropped his gaze.
“I love you, Takafumi, but―”
He looked up.
“It hurts to be in love, doesn’t it?” Kitagawa said. “Takafumi, do I have to feel like this the whole time I’m in love with you?”
“I think―” Kitagawa dropped his gaze. “I’m thinking, once I get out, I’ll have a talk with your girlfriend. For her, she might be able to be with someone other than you. But for me, it has to be you. It just has to be.”
“my searching and wanting to see you is a one-sided thing. I love you, and as long as I have you I don’t need anything else. But you don’t love me as much as that.”
At the first time, I had read it because the translator said i is the most successful works of the author with a lot of nominations and awards, as well as i just finished Uttsukushi Koto and I fall in love with her style.
For me, it is great work although the theme is dark and sensual. It made me cried some times while reading and there are some of the social problems addressed in this book.
Below is the short quotation that I really like ( SPOILER ALERT )
“Hey,” Kitagawa said, as Douno lay in his futon with his eyes closed. “Everyone says it’s weird, but I really used to think I wouldn’t mind living here for the rest of my life. Sometimes it can get too hot or too cold, but I never have to worry about having enough to eat. Even if I get out, I’d have nothing I want to do. But when I thought about how I could live with you―stick close to you all day long if I wanted, and never get in trouble for it―then I started wanting to go outside.”
“Even after you said you had a girlfriend, Takafumi, I’m always thinking and thinking. But no matter how much I think about it, I still want to be with you.”
“Takafumi, I’m always thinking of you. I think of you the moment I wake up until when I go to sleep. Does your girlfriend think of you as much as I do?”
“I don’t care if I get punished,” Kitagawa said emotionlessly. “I can’t think of anything else that might make you happy.”
Douno dropped his gaze.
“I love you, Takafumi, but―”
He looked up.
“It hurts to be in love, doesn’t it?” Kitagawa said. “Takafumi, do I have to feel like this the whole time I’m in love with you?”
“I think―” Kitagawa dropped his gaze. “I’m thinking, once I get out, I’ll have a talk with your girlfriend. For her, she might be able to be with someone other than you. But for me, it has to be you. It just has to be.”
“my searching and wanting to see you is a one-sided thing. I love you, and as long as I have you I don’t need anything else. But you don’t love me as much as that.”
February 1, 2023
Finishing this book felt like leaving back a good old friend.
Dunou goes to jail for a crime he has not committed. There he meets Kitagawa, a guy who is serving time for murder. Kitagawa becomes obsessed with Dunou and after they both get released, he decides to search for him so he can live forever with him.
Obsession equals love in most BL media, this book is not an exception. Borderline rape scenes, stalking behavior and an uncomfortable relationship between Kitagawa and Dunou's daughter (yes, Dunou gets married to a woman at some point) are major issues with this novel.
What's different than most others is the context. Both guys are (or are considered) criminals, living in a hetero-normative traditional Japanese society. Kitagawa's life as a child left him no room for exploration of human relationships and respect of boundaries. The expectations from Dunou as man of the household leave his homoerotic feelings suppressed. It is almost impossible for these two characters to have a healthy relationship - they may find a balance, but it can't be described as healthy.
As far as storytelling skills are concerned, Konohara (and the English translator) is a master. I was so invested in every character he introduced, I could see clearly any scenery he described and I felt the pain and the enjoyment during the few sex scenes.
The story is divided in three parts, the second one being from the point of view of a detective searching for Dunou. This was the most interesting - watching how a typical person reacted to our couple's relationship during jail time and Kitagawa's continuous search for his then partner. I liked the detective, then I hated him, he deserved his end.
Each plot twist during the third part was more interesting than the previous one. Some were cliches but they were well executed.
Notes:
I didn't read the short stories that came after the main series.
Dunou goes to jail for a crime he has not committed. There he meets Kitagawa, a guy who is serving time for murder. Kitagawa becomes obsessed with Dunou and after they both get released, he decides to search for him so he can live forever with him.
Obsession equals love in most BL media, this book is not an exception. Borderline rape scenes, stalking behavior and an uncomfortable relationship between Kitagawa and Dunou's daughter (yes, Dunou gets married to a woman at some point) are major issues with this novel.
What's different than most others is the context. Both guys are (or are considered) criminals, living in a hetero-normative traditional Japanese society. Kitagawa's life as a child left him no room for exploration of human relationships and respect of boundaries. The expectations from Dunou as man of the household leave his homoerotic feelings suppressed. It is almost impossible for these two characters to have a healthy relationship - they may find a balance, but it can't be described as healthy.
As far as storytelling skills are concerned, Konohara (and the English translator) is a master. I was so invested in every character he introduced, I could see clearly any scenery he described and I felt the pain and the enjoyment during the few sex scenes.
The story is divided in three parts, the second one being from the point of view of a detective searching for Dunou. This was the most interesting - watching how a typical person reacted to our couple's relationship during jail time and Kitagawa's continuous search for his then partner. I liked the detective, then I hated him, he deserved his end.
Each plot twist during the third part was more interesting than the previous one. Some were cliches but they were well executed.
Notes:
I didn't read the short stories that came after the main series.
November 21, 2022
I read this from the same site I read NO.6 on, so it was also done by the same translator. I mostly read it because of that and because the premise (and cover art) looked pretty interesting. While I can say I'm glad I read this, I can't say I thought the relationship in it was particularly... right. I can't figure out if Narise Konohara was trying to show off an unhealthy relationship or one where any of the stuff Kitagawa did was romantic. I think it's the latter mainly due to how the novel ends, but I just cannot wrap my head around it. The writing is lovely at least, I can give it that.
If you pretend nothing until the very end of this exists then it has a lot of cute and thoughtful moments, otherwise uh... nah.
If you pretend nothing until the very end of this exists then it has a lot of cute and thoughtful moments, otherwise uh... nah.
October 15, 2020
Sự thật về tình yêu và cuộc sống được lột trần trụi, có mất mát, có đau đớn, có lạc nhau và tìm thấy nhau, cùng với đó cách mà một con người “bình thường” tiếp nhận một người “bất thường” vào cuộc đời. Nhưng cách kể chuyện dịu dàng khiến những mũi dao như được bọc lại vẫn khiến tim rỉ rả một cách êm ái.
Đôi khi sẽ tức giận tại sao Douno lại xử sự như vậy nhưng nếu đặt bản thân là một người thuần tính, liệu có chắc bản thân sẽ không hèn nhát như anh?
Lại một lần nữa câu hỏi được đặt ra: Liệu có ai chấp nhận yêu một người đơn thuần từ năm này qua năm nọ một tình yêu bền bỉ như Kitagawa không nhỉ?
Một tác phẩm xứng đáng nhận được nhiều giải thưởng đến vậy. Một tác giả xứng danh đại thần BL.
Đôi khi sẽ tức giận tại sao Douno lại xử sự như vậy nhưng nếu đặt bản thân là một người thuần tính, liệu có chắc bản thân sẽ không hèn nhát như anh?
Lại một lần nữa câu hỏi được đặt ra: Liệu có ai chấp nhận yêu một người đơn thuần từ năm này qua năm nọ một tình yêu bền bỉ như Kitagawa không nhỉ?
Một tác phẩm xứng đáng nhận được nhiều giải thưởng đến vậy. Một tác giả xứng danh đại thần BL.
July 30, 2018
So... This is supposed to be a love story. Yet that wasn't the impression I got, it read more like a psychological horror. If you enjoy reading stories about romanticized rape, romanticized stalking and romaticized asking-for-the-hand-of-a-four-year-old-in-marriage, this will be your jam.
It wasn't mine though.
I'm not giving it a one, though, because, while it's a very tone-deaf book, it's still a well-written one. I finished this in a day, after all, despite my dislike. (Look, I just kept hoping the author would fix the more problematic aspects in the last two pages or something. I was wrong.)
It wasn't mine though.
I'm not giving it a one, though, because, while it's a very tone-deaf book, it's still a well-written one. I finished this in a day, after all, despite my dislike. (Look, I just kept hoping the author would fix the more problematic aspects in the last two pages or something. I was wrong.)
February 8, 2024
3.5 out of 5. So difficult to rate because parts of this story are compelling and emotional. An immunity to the SA/dubcon that's commonplace in BL is required to get any sort of enjoyment out of this, but the SA scene in the first part of this story is so insane I couldn't quite reconcile how unphased MC was by it. He thought it was "horrible" as it happened and that was the extent of it. Although ML's unhealthy obsession and lack of boundaries made him creepy at times, he turned out to be rather endearing.
Avoid reading the third part of the last extra (Summer Vacation - Pt. 3) to save yourself from heartbreak.
Avoid reading the third part of the last extra (Summer Vacation - Pt. 3) to save yourself from heartbreak.
April 13, 2025
3,5. I would rate it lower if I looked at it as a romance. Overall, it has the typical SA that BLs have (ML forcing himself onto the MC who doesn't fight back but just takes it until he gives in), but Kei proposing to marry the MC's 4-year-old daughter did make me do a double-take.
Reading the detective's part was a bit of a chore, but the next volume was so worth it. Cheating wife and dead daughter, it was obvious yet still interesting enough to keep on reading. Didn't really care about MC and ML as an item, though.
Reading the detective's part was a bit of a chore, but the next volume was so worth it. Cheating wife and dead daughter, it was obvious yet still interesting enough to keep on reading. Didn't really care about MC and ML as an item, though.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
September 21, 2025
I'm a mess of emotions! This is the best novel I've read and has everything I want in a story. My friend recommended this to me over a year ago and I always thought it would be hard, motivation wise, to get through it. But I devoured this shit so fast. The characters and the plot is so unique, raw and beautiful. I needed Kei Kitagawa in my life like I need air to breathe. I've never known a story quite like this one and I feel like it will stay on my mind for a lifetime... soooo unexpectedly good. If I could: 6/5!
May 24, 2020
“ I love you, Takafumi, but―”
He looked up.
“It hurts to be in love, doesn’t it?” Kitagawa said. “Takafumi, do I have to feel like this the whole time I’m in love with you?”
He looked up.
“It hurts to be in love, doesn’t it?” Kitagawa said. “Takafumi, do I have to feel like this the whole time I’m in love with you?”
July 23, 2020
ta có thể bao dung người khác bao nhiêu, có thể yêu người khác được bao nhiêu?
September 5, 2020
やるせなくて、痛くて苦しくて切なくて、愛おしい。すごく心が揺さぶられた。
January 11, 2022
Konohara is good at writing characters that are a little different. They really do burrow into your heart.
April 5, 2024
Great writing, I enjoyed the author’s style very much. Kitagawa’s pure love for Douno just breaks my heart. Overall a 4.5/5!
August 8, 2024
3,5/5
như vừa sống một đời người
như vừa sống một đời người
August 13, 2024
A love story in a different form.
Pure juvenile love drives the story.
Pure juvenile love drives the story.
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