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Misconception: A true story of life, love and infertility
One couple's quest to conceive a child, charting the highs and lows of life lived in the shadow of infertility
I'm 39 years old, happily married and my womb has never been inhabited. I want a baby but not in that crazy, desperate way where I cringe whenever I see someone else with one, or I think nasty, evil thoughts about people who are pregnant, but a child of my own would complete my life and make my husband extremely happy.
Jay-Jay Feeney has been married to Dom Harvey since 2004. She always imagined they'd get married, have children, grow old. But so far, things haven't worked out quite as she expected. A high-profile job, an unpredictable family life, and medical procedures and emergencies have kept her on her toes. Here is Jay-Jay's story, told with a mix of brutal honesty and humor, in which she charts the highs and lows of life lived both in the public gaze and in the shadow of infertility.
I'm 39 years old, happily married and my womb has never been inhabited. I want a baby but not in that crazy, desperate way where I cringe whenever I see someone else with one, or I think nasty, evil thoughts about people who are pregnant, but a child of my own would complete my life and make my husband extremely happy.
Jay-Jay Feeney has been married to Dom Harvey since 2004. She always imagined they'd get married, have children, grow old. But so far, things haven't worked out quite as she expected. A high-profile job, an unpredictable family life, and medical procedures and emergencies have kept her on her toes. Here is Jay-Jay's story, told with a mix of brutal honesty and humor, in which she charts the highs and lows of life lived both in the public gaze and in the shadow of infertility.
- GenresMemoir
244 pages, Kindle Edition
First published September 1, 2013
2 people are currently reading
66 people want to read
About the author
Jay-Jay Feeney
2 books1 followerFeeney was born Jacqulyn-Joanne Barbara Feeney. Aka Jay-JayHarvey.
Known mainly as a radio host, but in 2015 she appeared on the NZ version of Dancing With the Stars. Jay-Jay came fourth.
Author of Misconception.
Known mainly as a radio host, but in 2015 she appeared on the NZ version of Dancing With the Stars. Jay-Jay came fourth.
Author of Misconception.
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 30 reviews
January 4, 2014
I remember coming out of Brad Crouch's office and seeing Jay Jay and Dom waiting to go in. They'd already had a very public journey with IVF which I hadn't followed but was intrigued to see them there. I'd had a feeling they'd reached the end of the journey by then and was surprised to see them turning now to natural alternatives - a starting for us at that point.
Incredible to read that they were still going at the time of print (2013) albeit with a different pathway than they'd first imagined. Every IVF journey is different. This is a more sobering one and certainly puts things in perspective if you need to know what other people go through. Don't know if I would recommend it to people who are currently going through IVF. Depends how you relate to other people stories. I know I would've adopted it as my own and felt perhaps unnecessary despair in a game where hope is the only thing you have.
Incredible to read that they were still going at the time of print (2013) albeit with a different pathway than they'd first imagined. Every IVF journey is different. This is a more sobering one and certainly puts things in perspective if you need to know what other people go through. Don't know if I would recommend it to people who are currently going through IVF. Depends how you relate to other people stories. I know I would've adopted it as my own and felt perhaps unnecessary despair in a game where hope is the only thing you have.
October 4, 2013
Wow, what an open account of one couple's IVF journey. I think this would be a good book for family and friends of someone that is doing IVF and for anyone going through it, especially if the issue is male infertility. It was difficult to read in places, but only because I know only too well the devastation of several failed IVF cycles, and the bitter disappointment is still raw. Unless you have done IVF, you can't possibly get it, but I think this book explains the journey really well.
Well done, Jay-Jay, and all the best for you and Dom to achieve this dream.
Well done, Jay-Jay, and all the best for you and Dom to achieve this dream.
November 9, 2013
Fully opened up my mind to the IVF world and the struggle that can come with it. Beautiful story, and how brave of her to openly talk about it! Easy as read
October 7, 2021
Learnt a lot about the process of IVF. It is so demanding and hard, both physically and emotionally! Salute to all the women who are doing this worldwide!
Naturally went to check out Jay-Jay's recent update after the book, hoping to read there's a child in her life now. Astonished to read instead that the couple was now spilt, but after the initial shock, it seems a pretty normal (but sad nonetheless) development to me. After the countless heartaches for so many years, it is very understandable that the couple would want some fresh beginnings with their lives respectively, apart from each others.
A good and easy read. I like how honest and open of the couple (couldn't make this book otherwise).
Naturally went to check out Jay-Jay's recent update after the book, hoping to read there's a child in her life now. Astonished to read instead that the couple was now spilt, but after the initial shock, it seems a pretty normal (but sad nonetheless) development to me. After the countless heartaches for so many years, it is very understandable that the couple would want some fresh beginnings with their lives respectively, apart from each others.
A good and easy read. I like how honest and open of the couple (couldn't make this book otherwise).
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August 26, 2021I decided to check this out because I've had quite a few friends have to go through the IVF process. I also figured that being a Radio DJ and natural entertainer that Jay-Jay would put forward an interesting and no holds barred account of her experience.
The book covers a bit of her life story leading up to meeting her husband (and former co-host) Dom before launching into their attempts to conceive.
The book was injected with just the right amount of humour to offset, but not undermine the heartbreak and emotional fatigue that this particular treadmill brings with it.
The book covers a bit of her life story leading up to meeting her husband (and former co-host) Dom before launching into their attempts to conceive.
The book was injected with just the right amount of humour to offset, but not undermine the heartbreak and emotional fatigue that this particular treadmill brings with it.
June 27, 2017
So brave to be so open about infertility. This book isn't about writing a novel...it's about sharing experience from which others can learn. Well done Jay Jay.
November 10, 2020
I give Jay-Jay and Dom points for honesty, and being willing to share so openly. It's a heartbreaking story, and it's important. But as a book, I didn't enjoy it.
August 28, 2013
After reading Dom Harvey's book, Bucket List of an Idiot last year and being an Edge listener, I was always bound to get this book. I enjoy listening to their show above all others because they're fun, inappropriate and enjoy a good laugh much like myself. I do all of my reading on my Kindle so I was glad to see it was available on Amazon.com on release day.
Jay-Jays story really gets straight into it right from the start, and by opening up about her own life from the very beginning you are immediately given a sense of where she has come from and the things that she has gone through that you otherwise wouldn't have had the slightest idea of by listening to her on the show. I personally felt a little uncomfortable about the amount of information that was presented so quickly, but could see that it was an important part of the story to tell and therefore needed to be written.
I had seen the Sunday documentary, and that had been quite emotional. As someone who is neither here, nor there about having kids someday I related to the part of them that yearned for the ability to create life together in the sense that it would be their ultimate happiness. The Sunday documentary crammed a lot of information into a short space of time, but this book is really the behind the scenes that will show you all of the ups and downs, and highs and lows of a couple that goes through IVF. You are given a very large and graphic insight into the various operations that they each had to undertake numerous times, and the reasons why they are needing to go through this route; it really does cover it all.
I recommend this book not only to people who are going through a similar thing in their lives, but to anyone who will do and go through what it takes in the pursuit of happiness. It's entertaining, humorous (see statement earlier on in the book about wanting a "box gap"), sad and thought provoking. On their show they had mentioned that someone had called it a page-turner and I wholeheartedly agree.
Jay-Jays story really gets straight into it right from the start, and by opening up about her own life from the very beginning you are immediately given a sense of where she has come from and the things that she has gone through that you otherwise wouldn't have had the slightest idea of by listening to her on the show. I personally felt a little uncomfortable about the amount of information that was presented so quickly, but could see that it was an important part of the story to tell and therefore needed to be written.
I had seen the Sunday documentary, and that had been quite emotional. As someone who is neither here, nor there about having kids someday I related to the part of them that yearned for the ability to create life together in the sense that it would be their ultimate happiness. The Sunday documentary crammed a lot of information into a short space of time, but this book is really the behind the scenes that will show you all of the ups and downs, and highs and lows of a couple that goes through IVF. You are given a very large and graphic insight into the various operations that they each had to undertake numerous times, and the reasons why they are needing to go through this route; it really does cover it all.
I recommend this book not only to people who are going through a similar thing in their lives, but to anyone who will do and go through what it takes in the pursuit of happiness. It's entertaining, humorous (see statement earlier on in the book about wanting a "box gap"), sad and thought provoking. On their show they had mentioned that someone had called it a page-turner and I wholeheartedly agree.
January 1, 2014
Jay-Jay Feeney and Dominic Harvey have such outgoing personalities and give me so many laughs in the morning when I listen to them on the Edge in the morning that even tho I had watched the documentary the other year, I realise I have absolutely no idea of what they have gone thru to try and achieve their dream of having a baby.
Misconception is such an incredible read, there were so many things I loved about it. Reading it is like listening to Jay-Jay have a conversation in the morning radio and the opening chapter explaining how she got to where she is today was exceptional. I was hooked by the first page. I really liked Dom's version of events and alot of the time it was like I was there beside them. I also love their honesty about Seven, he's had a rough start to life but it's so obvious he's loved immensely. I love that the secret facebook group haven't shared Jay-Jays posts and I love that Jay-Jay has the "Boys Club".
There are times on the radio I think man Dom's an ass but after reading Misconception I will never ever call Dom an ass again. He may do dumb things and say dumb things on the radio sometimes but what he has gone thru with Jay-Jay overrides all of that. He's incredible!
Jay-Jay if you ever read this review, my wish for you is that if the artificial inseminating doesn't work... please consider adopting. I'm adopted (from 1year old) as was my brother and we were so lucky enough to have the parents who have raised us. Judging by the book, you and Dom have so much love to give, any child you add to your family will be exceptionally blessed.
Misconception is such an incredible read, there were so many things I loved about it. Reading it is like listening to Jay-Jay have a conversation in the morning radio and the opening chapter explaining how she got to where she is today was exceptional. I was hooked by the first page. I really liked Dom's version of events and alot of the time it was like I was there beside them. I also love their honesty about Seven, he's had a rough start to life but it's so obvious he's loved immensely. I love that the secret facebook group haven't shared Jay-Jays posts and I love that Jay-Jay has the "Boys Club".
There are times on the radio I think man Dom's an ass but after reading Misconception I will never ever call Dom an ass again. He may do dumb things and say dumb things on the radio sometimes but what he has gone thru with Jay-Jay overrides all of that. He's incredible!
Jay-Jay if you ever read this review, my wish for you is that if the artificial inseminating doesn't work... please consider adopting. I'm adopted (from 1year old) as was my brother and we were so lucky enough to have the parents who have raised us. Judging by the book, you and Dom have so much love to give, any child you add to your family will be exceptionally blessed.
August 10, 2018
Wow, what a brutal, raw and honest book. I wish every author would be so candid.
Though there are funny moments, this is not a book for those wanting more of the same JayJay and Dom you hear on the morning show. And that's not a bad thing. This is a totally frank account of their journey with infertility and the sometimes heartbreaking disappointments that come with it.
I have to say, the ending was tough, especially knowing how things have ended up today. I would be very interested to read a follow up, even if it turns out they did not try any further, just about how JayJays life has panned out from here, her subsequent split, her battles with mental health, and leaving the Edge etc.
It was really fascinating learning how the ivf procedure works. I was surprised to find out how invasive and painful it is on a physical level.
I'd definitely recommend this book, but maybe be careful if you are currently going through infertility yourself, and know that hearing if others disappointments might be triggering for you.
Amazing book.
Though there are funny moments, this is not a book for those wanting more of the same JayJay and Dom you hear on the morning show. And that's not a bad thing. This is a totally frank account of their journey with infertility and the sometimes heartbreaking disappointments that come with it.
I have to say, the ending was tough, especially knowing how things have ended up today. I would be very interested to read a follow up, even if it turns out they did not try any further, just about how JayJays life has panned out from here, her subsequent split, her battles with mental health, and leaving the Edge etc.
It was really fascinating learning how the ivf procedure works. I was surprised to find out how invasive and painful it is on a physical level.
I'd definitely recommend this book, but maybe be careful if you are currently going through infertility yourself, and know that hearing if others disappointments might be triggering for you.
Amazing book.
November 10, 2013
Having never gone through IVF or known anyone who has, I have no experience in it but I felt Jayjay's writing was honest and to the point. It was hard to read at times, as I wanted it to work out for her, and I could feel the disappointment and pain when it didn’t. The anecdotes from The Edge tied in well, and I learnt more about Jayjay then just her on air persona.
September 21, 2015
Wow, what a fantastic read. After travelling down the same path as you Jay-Jay, I just felt your pain and could relate to every aspect. I could not put the book down and read it just over a day. Whilst I absolutely loved it, it just wasn't the outcome I had hoped for you. Bless you and thank you for sharing your journey with us. Just loved this book.
August 30, 2013
Great and well written memoir. The fertility storyline intertwined perfectly with general anecdotes and stories from the radio etc. Definitely one of the best non fiction books I had read in a while.
June 12, 2014
A really brave story with insight into such a painful process for such a public couple. Thanks for sharing your story Jay Jay! I had no idea about what IVF was like before. Wishing you guys all the best and thanks for your bravery :) You guys rock!
December 4, 2014
After reading Dom's book I simply had to read Jay Jays...infertility is a hidden problem for many New Zealanders. Thank you for sharing your personal battle and giving us an insight into the trauma involved. Highly recommend
September 10, 2013
Honest and real. I read this in one afternoon. Good luck Jay-jay and Dom. I hope you get the baby you want.
October 16, 2013
An honest, frank story of a much loved celebrity couple struggling with infertility.
January 7, 2014
So love Jj nd dom just thought book woukd b more about her life
January 7, 2014
it was wonderful book just love it :-)
January 25, 2014
so heartbreaking! almost cried everytime the IVF failed. but her strength and determination is very inspiring. well worth the read, couldn't put it down :-)
February 10, 2014
Very easy to read - read it in 3 days. An honest account of trying to conceive with IVF.
March 25, 2014
Not the best-written book I've ever read, but a useful addition to the material able to be accessed by couples starting a programme of IVF.
May 12, 2014
Enjoyed it immensely
November 8, 2014
A very moving book
August 3, 2015
Such a moving story. I really feel for Jay Jay & Dom. I hope one day they get their miracle
April 30, 2016
Honest and real...
June 6, 2024
So raw and honest. Great read. 🩷
August 30, 2013
Incredibly honest and heart wrenching. Respect to you Jay-Jay, you are an amazing strong person.
October 11, 2013
A really good read. An open account of her & Doms fertility issues.
August 31, 2016
Great read, I learnt so much!
Displaying 1 - 30 of 30 reviews