Exposure

by Ava Dellaira

GRIEF IS LIKE THIS . . .

Falling in love with your best friend, only to lose her to a mysterious death.

Working for decades to achieve a dream, and just when it’s within reach, watching it threaten to go up in flames.

Longing for your deceased father to celebrate with you when your first novel sells.

Spending the first sleepless months in the throes of new motherhood alone, as your husband struggles to save his career.

Befriending the woman who should be your enemy, because you are that lonely . . .

Annie, Jesse, Noah, and Juliette are tied together by their experiences of grief; they are separated by their own versions of the truth of what happened on a single night twelve years ago, when Juliette, a college freshman grieving her mother, and Noah, a high school senior fighting for a place in a world that told him he didn’t matter, found each other. Spanning decades, this complex, captivating story pulls back the curtains of cancel culture to explore ambition, empathy, art, desire, consent, motherhood, and what it really means to lose everything.

Genres: Fiction, Audiobook, Contemporary, Romance, Literary Fiction, Realistic Fiction, Book Club

416 pages, Paperback

First published September 10, 2024

About the author

Ava Dellaira's debut adult novel, Exposure, will be published by Zibby Books in September of 2024. Her young adult debut, Love Letters to the Dead, was named a Best Book of the Year by Apple, Google, BuzzFeed, the New York Public Library and the Chicago Public Library, and was also featured in Vanity Fair, Entertainment Weekly, USA Today, and The New York Times Book Review. Her young adult follow-up In Search of Us was the recipient of widespread critical acclaim. Her fiction has been translated into 24 languages. She is a graduate of the Iowa Writers’ Workshop, where she was a Truman Capote Fellow. She grew up in Albuquerque, New Mexico, and received her undergraduate degree from the University of Chicago. She lives in Altadena, CA with her husband and their two young children.

Reviews

[Jillian B · Rating 5 out of 5]

Juliette and Noah meet in their late teens. They bond over their love of writing and their deep grief over the deaths of their mothers. After one drunken date, Noah never sees Juliette again. He thinks he’s been ghosted. He won’t learn until much later that she died.

Fast forward about a decade, and Noah is about to make it big as a filmmaker. After years of crappy restaurant jobs and rejected scripts, his debut film is getting a ton of buzz. That is, until Juliette’s best friend discovers something in Juliette’s diary. Something that might tie Noah to Juliette’s death. His newly stable life is about to explode.

I really enjoyed this book, because the characters and their choices are so complex. None of them are purely good or bad (even the ones who do very bad things), and as they’re thrust into each other’s lives, they alternately hurt and help one another. In the hands of a lesser writer, this story could have been in poor taste, but the author has created characters with such well-crafted inner worlds that I empathized with all of them. This book is so beautifully written, and I definitely recommend it to fellow literary fic lovers.

[Hannah]

Look, I'm always here for a "look at these unrelated people living their lives; come along while we figure out what weird thing connects them all" story. And this one started out very interesting. As we got closer to the crux, though, it got reeeeeeeeally tryhard and became ever more obvious that the author is a white woman who is positively desperate to show how down she is. Near the beginning I was actually kind of impressed with her handling of a Black character, but then as it went on it became more and more ridiculous and out of touch and extremely in need of a cultural accuracy editor, and Noah's sections became more and more of a list of checkboxes of "mention this thing to show how aware I am of X issue affecting Black men" that accidentally revealed that while she might understand the general idea of what affects Black people, she absolutely doesn't understand what it's like to have the interiority of a Black person.

I think the intention here was to do a "there are multiple sides to every story" type of thing, where you have to contend with both the reality that white women have weaponized their innocence to destroy Black men for centuries, as well as the reality that powerful (in any sense of the word) men have weaponized their sexuality and power over women for centuries, and what do we do when those two realities are seemingly working at cross purposes? But like....this is a novel, not a Talmudic debate, and fiction is a place where the author gets to choose exactly what is and isn't factual because it's her world and her plot, so that kind of "well, who's right? we all get to debate it now" thing doesn't work because the author gets to decide what information we're privy to and what actually happened.

The author very obviously has a huge preoccupation with losing parents, and that exploration of the different ways grief manifests is so much more interesting and (from the perspective of someone whose parents are living, so I can't really speak to it deeply) seemingly more well done. She should have stuck to that. All the oblique references to the various American elections when the literal years the story was happening were stated were just weird, and the entire book just felt like it had the intellectual depth of a pantsuit and a pussy hat.

I think it's funny that this is the second Zibby Books audiobook I've gotten from LibroFM, and both of them were presented as rEvoLuTiOnArY books about race and gender but that's really only true if you're a white woman for whom literally any revelation about race no matter how tiny is mindblowing but extremely facile, underexplored, uncritical, and underedited if you aren't new to racism and weren't born yesterday. I guess if you're into seemingly deep book club fare but you have neither the interest nor the capacity to actually do deep critical work, this is the small publishing company for you! As for me, I'm going to have to be more careful from now on to decline their ARCs, because I gave up an entire Saturday for this audiobook and it was ultimately not worth it.

[Carm · Rating 2 out of 5]

Hmmmmm enjoyed most of this but maybe a white woman shouldn't try to write about race issues from the perspective of a black man

[Tony Smith · Rating 1 out of 5]

I have stewed on this book for months now, I give it a different rating every time I think about it. I have so many mixed thoughts about it and every time I check the reviews to see if anyone has explored any of my similar thoughts... they haven't. I don't particularly want to recommend this book to anyone, but I also need someone to read it and tell me what they think at the same time. If nothing else, this book could create interesting conversation, even if it's just to discuss the issues with the writing.

Thank you to Zibby Books and Netgalley for a digital arc in exchange for an honest review.

[Zibby Owens · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is a powerful and provocative about the protagonists, Noah, a Black high school senior, and Juliette, a white college freshman, who go home together after a night of drinking. The two meet; they're lonely souls, they form a connection, and after a night of drinking, they go home together. The story leaves there, and we move both backward and forward in time, getting to know Noah and Juliet and those closest to them as we explore the themes that shape their lives, like the intensity of young female friendship, the tension between artistic ambition and romantic partnership, the effects of race and class and loss and grief. Twelve years later, we see that Noah has broken into Hollywood with his first big movie. He and his long-time wife Jessie have just had their first child when a news story breaks about a girl named Annie (Juliet's best friend back in LA) who has accused Noah of raping Juliet back when he was in high school.

The story breaks into multiple viewpoints and timelines, both from Noah's and Juliet's, as well as Annie's and Jesse's. It explores themes of race, artistic ambition, grief, and the co-existence of conflicting truths. At its heart, it's really a book about what it means to empathize with opposing points of view and the possibility of holding space for more than one truth at the same time.

To listen to my interview with the author, go to my podcast at:
https://zibbymedia.com/blogs/transcri...

[Nursebookie · Rating 4 out of 5]

TITLE: EXPOSURE
AUTHOR: AVA DELLAIRA
NARRATOR: Erin Ruth Walker
LENGTH: 13h 11m
PUB DATE: 09.10.2024

I just started reading this fabulous book and alternating listening to this incredible audio book thanks to @librofm and I cannot tell you how hooked I am. For the last few days, I have done nothing but immerse my every waking moment with the lives of four people - Noah, Jesse, Annie, and Juliette. The story has different perspectives - one is about the struggles for success as a novelist and a screenplay writer, the other is about love and how we process grief and loss. The way the story weaved itself was masterfully done, slowly revealing itself in just the perfect time. I devoured this emotionally charged novel and could not get enough.

I enjoyed it so much!

[Linda · Rating 2 out of 5]

I did not like this book. Nothing about it was good in my opinion. It was slow. Did not hold my attention. It did not make me feel any emotion except boredom. This doesn’t happen to me often but this time it did.

I read some very good reviews of others who lived the story. I just didn’t. I never connected with any of the characters. The storylines to me were just slow and kind of like the same thing over and over. Two girls fall in love with each other. They also have sex with boys. Then there is Noah who wants to be a screenwriter but no one will give him a chance. While I didn’t believe it was because he was black as very few people are successful screenwriters no matter they color, this author I think tried to make it a race issue. Noah came across as very racists in my opinion. Then he started watching violent porn while his girlfriend was away promoting her book. Good grief.

The story is told about four people. Noah and his girlfriend. I liked Jessie but not Noah. Also Anne and Juliette. Juliette and Noah met and had a short fling. Years go by and secrets come out that might ruin one’s life. This book was just over the top for me. I just didn’t like it.

Also the audio was horrible. The narrator sounded like she was reading a list instead of a story. Her voice was awful. She did not do a good job at all. I put the audio away and just read it but still hated this story.

I’m sorry but I really have to be honest. Awful book.

Thank you #netgalley for this ARC. This is my own thoughts about this book.

2 stars.

[Salty Swift · Rating 4 out of 5]

Ava Dellaira's Exposure is a multi-dimensional story that focuses on race, love, friendship and a terrible event that shapes all characters lives. Through a timeline of three decades, the story moves from a couple of best high school friends (Juliette and Annie) who later become lovers to Noah and Jesse, a couple who attempt to make their way as writers in Hollywood. Over the course of the novel, their paths will cross and not necessarily in the most positive fashion. Gritty, moving and spectacularly dense in beauty, Exposure is one of this year's great literary achievements.

[ThatBookish_deviant · Rating 4 out of 5]

3.75⭐️

Exposure would make such a great selection for bookclub discussion. It questions our beliefs around consent, power dynamics, privilege, race and cancel culture. It’s also a novel that explores the complexities and intricacies of friendship and romantic partnerships. Dellaira even tackles parental loss with such authentically heartfelt candor, it’s clear she’s writing from experience. A promising debut adult novel from writer Ava Dellaira.

[tre be · Rating 2 out of 5]

“𝐈 𝐮𝐧𝐝𝐞𝐫𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐭𝐞𝐦𝐩𝐭𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧 𝐭𝐨 𝐢𝐧𝐬𝐞𝐫𝐭 𝐫𝐚𝐜𝐞 𝐢𝐧𝐭𝐨 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐬𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧, 𝐛𝐮𝐭 𝐢𝐬 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐞 𝐧𝐨𝐭 𝐚 𝐥𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐥 𝐨𝐟 𝐫𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐰𝐫𝐨𝐧𝐠 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐠𝐨𝐞𝐬 𝐛𝐞𝐲𝐨𝐧𝐝 𝐫𝐚𝐜𝐞 𝐨𝐫 𝐠𝐞𝐧𝐝𝐞𝐫?”

This book felt like those days when there’s constant slushy rainfall and cloudy, sad gray skies. I’m always thinking, is it gonna rain, or what?

One huge chunk of the story is grief. I think each of the 4 main characters lost someone close to them.

The other main plot revolves around sexual assault. It reminded me somewhat of another book I read a couple months ago, Jaded. This is where my thoughts started to race and I started to think of a thousand questions on the topic.

The story never really pulled me in which is surprising because I always tend to be drawn to these types of reflective stories. However, the combination of the gloomy narration and the lengthy, fluffy sections…

More than anything I feel the story was about Noah and Jess’ relationship, past and present. For me it overshadowed the very plot that could’ve packed a bigger punch. I was very detached and disconnected from the story and the characters.

I can see a lot of feathers being ruffled by this one. I can see a lot of thoughtful conversations stemming from this one, as well.

[Kelly Hooker · Rating 4 out of 5]

Look out book clubs, riveting discussion awaits!

The power of EXPOSURE lies in the compelling questions it raises surrounding consent, cancel culture, and race. The story follows Noah, a Black high school senior, and Juiety, a white college freshman and the way their conflicting perceptions and stories surrounding the same event.

This character-driven novel by Ava Dellaira skillfully interrogates readers with a fascinating question: what happens when two people have valid yet conflicting stories about a shared experience? Can absolution or true redemption exist if the victim will never see justice? What does justice even look like twenty years later? What happens when “my truth” is conflated with “THE truth”?

READ THIS IF YOU:
-appreciate a provocative and thought-provoking read
-are willing to take a nuanced approach to a sensitive topic
-want a book that will promote a great book club discussion

RATING: 4/5
PUB DATE: September 10, 2024

[Petri · Rating 2 out of 5]

This is a hard book to rate because I did really enjoy the writing but I'm not really sure how I feel about how the book dealt with the topic of rape. Especially how it became this "man is accused of rape and look how his life is being ruined" - story, when in reality most rape cases go unreported and even when they do get reported the rapist often face little to none repercussion for it.

[Ana (_ana.reads) · Rating 4 out of 5]

4.5 stars! ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️✨
This is so thought provoking. It really dives into the complexities of the human experience, but it also makes you think about the simplicities.
The good, the bad, and all the grey area in between.

Highly recommend!

[Laura Graves Smith · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book was not at all what I expected. A rich character study that shows fullness and depth of each character, forcing the reader to evaluate events in a larger context. Grief is a main theme, as is the mother child relationships for each of the characters. This is a dark story but one I couldn’t stop thinking about and the writing is beautiful.
Noah, a Black teenager, has a brief sexual relationship with Juliette, a white college student who previously taught poetry to Noah in his high school. Neither knew the full context of each other’s lives in the way that the reader eventually does. After tragic events and years of struggling to break into the movie business, Noah is on the brink of success when Juliette’s best friend goes public accusing him of raping Juliette all those years before. This is a messy story with lots of overlapping gray areas and the reader’s sympathy and understanding change as more and more context is given.
This book would be excellent for a book club or discussion group as there is not one clear interpretation of right and wrong but rather many factors to consider.

Trigger warnings- rape, sexual assault, racism, suicide, death

[Becky • bookmarked by becky · Rating 5 out of 5]

If you're part of any book clubs, buddy read groups, or simply love books that spark meaningful conversations, you must add Exposure to your TBR list. This emotionally charged story isn't just thought-provoking; it will absolutely captivate you.

Dellaira crafts a complex, multi-layered story with multiple perspectives, offering various sides to the same narrative—a tale that explores how “both things can be true.” These distinct viewpoints foster empathy for all the characters in the book.

Dellaira tackles a wide range of profound topics - grief, early motherhood, divisiveness, race, female friendships, truth vs. memory, the complex dynamics of personal truth vs. someone else's perspective, as well as long-term trauma. While this may seem like an overwhelming array of subjects, Dellaira skillfully intertwines them into a cohesive narrative. One particularly brilliant element is her use of the simple yet impactful sentence, “Grief is like this:” which she weaves throughout the story. For example, “Grief is like this: inheritance.” “Grief is like this: a sorceress.” or “Grief is like this: a thief.” Simple yet profound, illustrating the many sides of grief. 4.5 ⭐️

[Shannon (The Book Club Mom) · Rating 4 out of 5]

EXPOSURE by Ava Dellaira is a debut that you don’t want to miss. I really enjoyed the style and structure of this novel. It’s told in such a unique and clever way. An encounter between two individuals occurs one night, which in turn, affects two others twelve years later. It follows these four characters through the years, multiple cities, and seasons of life. It also explores some heavier topics like sexual assault and the #metoo movement, while touching on race, class, desire, and ambition.

READ THIS IF YOU ENJOY:

- Multiple POVs and timelines
- Writer lifestyle
- Reflections on loss and grief
- Complex relationships
- Dark and gritty reads
- California and Chicago setting

Overall, this is a very impressive and well rounded debut with many layers, which makes me excited to read more from the author. If you enjoy slow-moving dramas centered around human behavior, then I think you’ll dig this one. 4/5 stars for EXPOSURE! It’s out now!

[Christy · Rating 4 out of 5]

⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ (4/5)

Exposure by Ava Dellaira is a powerful, thought-provoking read that spans decades & delves into the far-reaching effects of one fateful night on Noah, Jess, Anna, & Juliette. It brilliantly explores how desire, ambition, & upbringing can ripple through multiple lives, changing them forever.

Dellaira masterfully addresses sensitive topics like racism, sexual assault, & the MeToo movement with empathy & depth. Though heartbreaking at times, I was hooked from the very first chapter, needing to know how the story would unfold. The writing style pulled me in, & I loved the use of multiple POVs & timelines, which added layers to the story & kept me guessing to the very end!

This was my first time reading Ava Dellaira & I’m already looking forward to diving into more of her work. Exposure is a must-read for fans of emotional, character-driven drama. Highly recommend!

Thanks to #NetGalley, #ZibbyBooks, and #Exposure for the ARC. All opinions are my own.

[AP · Rating 5 out of 5]

How do I describe the way this book has impacted me. I thought I would just be sad. I didn’t think I’d be conflicted, angry, happy, and heartbroken. But now that I’ve finished the book I find myself wanting to tell the world to read it and also wanting no one else to ever read it in case they don’t enjoy it.

[Tammy · Rating 4 out of 5]

4 stars.

[Angela DeMaio · Rating 4 out of 5]

I am not sure how I want to rate this one yet. I think the way these four people's stories were weaved together was well done, but I wasn't invested in Noah + Jessy. If you are someone who loves a character driven novel then this is the book for you!

Thank you Zibby Books for the ARC + book box!

[Carla · Rating 4 out of 5]

What happens when two people interpret an encounter differently? What are the repercussions, not only for them, but for their future selves? These questions (and more!) are at the heart of Dellaira's debut adult novel, Exposure.

This book brought up a lot of complex thoughts and questions for me when I finished reading it. I immediately went to Goodreads and Bookstagram to seek out readers, and unfortunately for me, there are not a lot of reviews. I CRAVE someone to dissect this book with. There is so much to grapple with, and if I'm being honest, I'm not entirely sure how my feelings land with this one. But that's one of my favorite experiences with books - the ones that stick in my head for days after finishing, where I continue to contemplate all the angles, and where I really just want/NEED someone to have a deep dive conversation with.

There are four main POVs - Noah, Juliette, Jesse, and Annie. Little do they know that by the end of the story, they will all be interconnected in a way that blows up each of their lives. I loved the complex relationships, the interconnectedness that the characters share through their individual losses and grief, and the thought-provoking questions the book instilled in me.

[Lindsey · Rating 5 out of 5]

Apropos and well timed. I can’t shake this one. How can I be inside four people’s heads at once and still not know with certainty? How can multiple things be true all at once? If a book can make me so uncomfortable and be this thought provoking, it deserves all the praises.

[Taylor Hondos · Rating 2 out of 5]

…… love this author. Wanted to love this. The writing was fantastic…. The topics were very thought provoking but I have a problem of being in the POV of someone you could never understand as a white woman.

[Jamie · Rating 2 out of 5]

Chronologically atonal and confusing, despite having a pretty decent premise.

[Shana OkieCozyReader · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is the story mainly of two people, which also includes the pov of other people in their lives. It is the story of how grief and loss has controlled much of their lives:

“Juliette’s grief is fresh, still warm like blood just out of the body, whereas Noah’s is old, childhood grief, ossified into the bone around which all new emotional tissue has grown. But they recognize something in each other, she thinks—the existential wound of motherless kids, maybe.”

It is the story of “How more than one thing can be true in the same breath." Ch 48, as both Juliette and Noah each have painful stories, and both want to have a better, or a different future, at times. They can see the same event in a different way, that alters both of their lives. This main event doesn’t happen until about 60% into the book, so there is a lot of world building and backstory before you get there, specifically with those other people in their lives - esp Noah’s girlfriend Jesse, Juliette’s best friend / lover Annie, Juliette’s other romances. This leads the reader to question if there is someone who is 100% right ? Or can both people have some version of the truth that is true to them? In any case, you read how their pain caused so much pain to others.

“Living someone else's life gives her the fire she needs to fight for her own, the fire she to burn through the grief and become the woman her father raised.” Ch 8

“It is not until now that Jesse can fully taste her own hunger. Like many women, she had learned to dampen her ambition, even in the privacy of her own room.” Ch 10

“Why don't they understand: anger has to go somewhere. Rage can't be swallowed forever.” Ch 21

“Jesse is cast as a character, and the life she made, the man she married, all of it is food now for the starved people sitting in front of their computer screens at desks in corporate offices, in coffee shops, in bed with the light of their phones.” Ch 38

“She wants to hold on to her anger. For her, for Juliette, for her mother. What does she have without it? A bottomless sadness.” Ch 48

Thank you to Libro.fm and Zibby books for providing copies to librarians!

[Elizabeth Finn · Rating 5 out of 5]

I have so many thoughts about this book. It’s multidimensional. The writing is fantastic. This is an excellent read if you’re looking for work that delves into difficult topics and pushes you to accept the layers of grey that exist in topics we so desperately want to be black and white.
We live in a world where sexual assault is often simplified to a he said/she said scenario. Your choice is to decide whose story you believe, often based upon your own identity, preconceived notions, and personal experiences with the matter. Here, the author gifts us an all knowing position. Finally, we know what happened. We know what each character felt and how each character perceived the truth. This all knowingness is driven home when we, the reader, discover that Noah is a child of rape. This is a fact that no other characters seem to know. So, why does the author give us all this information? Possibly to prove a point-that nuance is everywhere, that two truths can exist at once. That, even when you know everything it’s not that simple.
Noah is both a rapist AND a human existing in the world as a black man, a boy and man grieving, a dreamer and creative, a father, a husband and a cheater.
Annie is a white woman, who easily can escape her pain and past by marrying an affluent white man. She has the privilege to escape into the void of brunches and mani pedis and good housewife behavior. BUT, she is also an abandoned child, a grieving daughter, a closeted (?) queer person, and a person living with immense guilt.
Every choice the author makes feels deliberate. The book is always asking, what does grief do to a person? What is the difference between losing someone you love and being abandoned by them?

[Rachelle · Rating 3 out of 5]

Exposure (thank you #gifted @zibbypublishing ) is a character-drive novel about grief, dreams, and the complex world we live in.

We follow four characters through decades, two best friends and one couple, all of whom have lost at least one parent. And the first 2/3 of the book describes their sorrow, the struggle sometimes to get through the day, the ways they feel adrift, in details that feel heartbreakingly real.

It also raises so many interesting questions, too, especially about gender roles, race, and ambition. Especially with the couple, one of whom wants to be an author and the other a scriptwriter, as they try to make it in LA and balance when one person succeeds but not the other.

The last section though, is where I thought the book really picked up. When we finally see how these characters intersect. I think the book summary gives away quite a bit so I'll remain vague here, but I thought it was so interesting how it examined a story from both sides, humanizing the people involved.

The groundwork is definitely laid in the beginning so that we feel invested in the fallout at the end.

I do wish the beginning and middle, before we learn about the night in question, had been shorter. But it's definitely a book that made me think, and I love the message about how complex all of us are, with our own dreams and losses. A complexity that's rarely visible from one article or Instagram caption. 3.5 stars

Exposure is out now in paperback!

[Marcie Saldivar · Rating 5 out of 5]

WOW! The writing in this book was amazing! I was a little reluctant going in when I saw how long the book was, but it was worth it. This story was deep and complex and really developed the characters. I was debating 4 or 5 stars, then when discussing it with a friend, I realized how passionately I was telling her the story and it hit me, 5 stars! Even with how long the book was I didn’t feel any points where the book was dragging. I was actually holding my breath at the end waiting for Juliette’s last perspective. Perspective is everything! There may be some triggers with heavy topics like sexual assault and race. Thank you to NetGalley and the publisher for this advanced reader’s copy.

[Joan Dans · Rating 5 out of 5]

This multiple POV novel with intrigue and plot twists kept me engaged and excited throughout. Dellaira makes it impossible not to get invested in the characters and care about the resolution, which deftly leaves the right amount to the imagination. It's a deep book, exploring themes of race, sexuality, mother-love, and the power of dreams, and there is a poetic thread that runs throughout about the effects of grief which really resonated and elevated the novel as a whole. Beautiful book!

[Zehava (Joyce) · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book is very very well written. The story is interesting and well told and I like how nothing was really wrapped up in a pretty package but you also didn’t really feel like you were left hanging. This books explores loss, grief, consent, early motherhood and fame in very true to life ways. Good audiobook.