An acclaimed author reflects on his upbringing in a post–World War II blue-collar family and comes to terms with the racism, sexism, and other toxic values he inherited.
Finalist for the 2014 New England Book Award in Non-Fiction
Richard Hoffman sometimes felt as though he had two the real one who raised him and an imaginary version, one he talked to on the phone, and one he talked to in his head. Although Hoffman was always close to the man, his father remained a mystery, shrouded in a perplexing mix of tenderness and rage. When his father receives a terminal cancer diagnosis, Hoffman confronts the depths and limitations of their lifelong struggle to know each other, weighing their differences and coming to understand that their yearning and puzzlement was mutual.
With familial relationships at its center, Love & Fury draws connections between past and present, from the author’s grandfather, a “breaker boy” sent down into the anthracite mines of Pennsylvania at the age of ten, to his young grandson, whose father is among the estimated one million young black men incarcerated today. In a critique of culture and of self, Hoffman grapples with the way we have absorbed and incorporated the compelling imagery of post WWII America and its values, especially regarding class, war, women, race, masculinity, violence, divinity, and wealth.
A masterful memoirist, Hoffman writes not only to tell a gripping story but also to understand, through his family, the social and ethical contours of American life. At the book’s core are the author’s questions about boyhood, fatherhood, and grandfatherhood, and about the changing meaning of what it means to be a good man in America, now and into the future.
Heartbreaking in its drama and acute in its cultural analysis, Hoffman’s searching memoir explores his reconciliation with his dying father as well as his own fathering and grandfathering. His uncreated conscience becomes the reader’s as he questions the “unspoken assumptions” of past and present, especially in regards to race, gender, class, violence, and religion. Here, for instance, discovering his deceased father’s “cache of ‘dirty magazines,’” he reflects on the history of pornography in their lifetimes: “The pornification of pop culture had begun: the cat was out of the bag; that is, the pussy was down off the top shelf and out of its plain brown wrapper. I think that we are still reeling from it, still in need of an ethics of sexuality that has less to do with body parts and more to do with power, less to do with secrecy, censorship, and shame, and more to do with how we treat one another.” Here he is again, contemplating his father’s body, prepared for burial, and realizing that he feels nothing: “Had I been younger, had writing not been a part of my life for more than forty years, I would have panicked at my lack of emotion. I would have levied a terrible judgment on myself. But now that I knew I was recording all of it, not only to write about it but to keep it, as I could not if I were distracted by sentiment.” This is a writer of hard won truths, a writer to cherish, learn from, and trust.
In this book, Richard Hoffman ponders many things, both close to home -- his family of origin and his own marriage and family -- and on a universal scale -- racism, sexism, war, man's inhumanity to man. At times, the narrative is focused and engaging, but at other times it veers off the rails.
Perhaps a reader needs to start with Mr. Hoffman's earlier memoir, Half the House, to make sense of this book. I felt lost much of the time. He mentions sexual abuse by a coach, but nothing that would help me understand its aftermath in his life. How old was he? Who was the guy? Did he tell anyone? Same with issues that arise in his family. We meet his daughter only as a pregnant teen, his son as a messed-up college student, his father, a defeated old man who spent his last 25 years watching television at ear-splitting levels. I know nothing else about these people, so it's hard to maintain sympathy and interest. I suspect what I'm looking for is in Mr. Hoffman's earlier book.
More disorienting to me was Mr. Hoffman's narrow focus on himself. Yes, I know this is a memoir, and "in the particular is contained the universal." But here, I felt that the grand themes were diminished by the relentless inward focus. He ponders whether his daughter chose to have a relationship with a black man only to get back at him, although he offers nothing that would indicate it. He stands at the funeral home in front of his father's body, a very affecting scene, and then yanks the reader out of it by saying he's aware he's going to write about it. He visits his daughter's boyfriend in prison and tells us -- repeatedly -- how very difficult it is for him. I had a lot of sympathy for the man who flat-out tells Mr. Hoffman to stop trying to make sense of his father for his own purposes: "Look, the guy doesn't owe you anything. He raised you. That's enough. Be grateful and leave the poor b*****d alone."
In the end, I come away with the feeling that this is Mr. Hoffman's book of questions, and that he hasn't arrived at the answers yet, and perhaps never will. I know that life is supposed to be all about the journey, but sometimes I'm just as interested in the destination.
This is a First Reads Review Hoffman is an incredibly talented writer. That was what really struck me about this book. He has a gift with words and it was clear that he is a poet. I really liked the structure of this book and appreciated how it wasn't chronological. It really made the memoir enjoyable to read because it wasn't predictable.
It is clear that Hoffman has compassion for people. Race was a huge part of this, and I thought the commentary on prisons was very forward thinking. It is disgusting how many people this country imprisons per year. We cage people up like they are animals, and I shared in Hoffman's rage.
This book deals with relationships between humans. Fathers, sons, daughters, wives, and races and I think Hoffman offered some poignant commentary and relatable themes. This is probably not a book my high school students would enjoy. I think, especially with the thoughts on death and religion, a lot of the concepts of the metaphysical are out of their grasp. However, I did enjoy the book and the writing style tremendously. I would like to hear more about the prison system and how Damion is doing.
I received Love and Fury from the Library Thing giveaway in exchange for an honest review. Prior to reading Richard Hoffman's memoir I was not aware of his work but the description of the book was interesting so I requested a copy. I was not disappointed and enjoyed reading about Hoffman"s reflection of his relationship with his father in the wake of his father's dying. He writes about this relationship as he saw it as a child, a father and now a new grandfather and intermingles his own relationships with his daughter, son, wife, and the imprisoned father of his grandson. Throughout the book he examines race, gender, class, religion and war and how these issues have shaped who he is and who is father was and how they have effected his familial relationships. I think one of the things I liked about this memoir was that it was not a shocking tell all aimed at gathering sympathy but rather an honest account of how he tries to understand and come to terms with his love and anger of his father.
My thanks to Richard Hoffman and Goodreads First Reads Giveaway for my copy of Love and Fury: A Memoir that I won in the Giveaway.
The best aspect of Love and Fury is the emotions and frustrations when generations of a family fail to communicate and feel close. In this case between the son and his father but their struggle can relate to many families where one generations holds back from the other. The political issues, effects of war and our country's culture is another influence in the story that adds depth. I grew up in this period, so it was easy to relate to the author although our situations were totally different but the underlying feelings of not communicating and developing a deeper relationship with my parents is a part of my growing up years. Love and Fury is an excellent story with an unusually deep emotional appeal.
As I read this book, I rated it a solid 5 stars. It is well written, easy to follow, and enjoyable to read. As I read the memoir, it was easy for me to relate to similar situations which Richard Hoffman includes in his writing. I am in an age group similar to that described by Richard. Consequently, many of the references and issues covered by the author were similar to social issues I experienced in my lifetime.
It was interesting reading about the successes, issues, and challenges experienced by Richard, his family, and those around them over a period of years. I was able to relate to many of the same type of issues that he describes in his writing.
I got this book through Goodreads. Now that I have read one of Richard Hoffman's books and have enjoyed reading it, I will look forward to getting more of his writings and reading more of what he has written.
Vacillating between present and past times, Hoffman's memoir trails through themes of religion, addiction, guilt, love, abuse and forgiveness, prompted by his relationships with his father, as well as the others in his immediate family. As a father and grandfather himself, Hoffman ponders, explores and examines his relationship with his father, sometimes tender and empathetic and sometimes disgusted.
There are moments of striking truth in Hoffman's graceful prose. "I am gravely disappointed by my inability to stay young, and I am becoming more fully aware every day of the unlikelihood that I will outwit death and live forever." This is a long way of writing a typically succinct point, yet, Hoffman is not being glib or fanciful. He is pointing out that adults harbor childhood impressions, hanging onto them long into adulthood.
In this book Richard Hoffman comes to terms with his father's illness, his daughter's pregnancy, his son's alcoholism and his own daily life. As his life occurs he looks back at all that has happened. Death can bring a family together but not so much for Richard and his father. He spends much of the book remembering his childhood and trying to better understand his father. At 18 Richard's daughter gets pregnant by a young Jamaican man and tries to make her own family. Richard's son battles alcoholism just like he did at a young age. Life hasn't been easy but this book is the story of just how Richard and his family dealt with everything that was thrown at them. I received this book for free through Goodreads First Reads.
Richard Hoffman's Love and Fury is a satisfying and complex read from a writer who has the capacity to dig deep and write with a microscopic lens of his interior responses while scanning his subject close up — be it the ambivalent relationship to his father ( a primary focus), his grandson's imprisoned father, his daughter, his son, grandson or wife. Hoffman writes with candor of deeply felt personal and cultural events from the perspective of six decades— as a child, son, brother, husband, father, and grandfather. No easy feat, I was mesmerized both by Hoffman's personal story and the courage of his words. I am grateful to have read this mature work and as a writer, to have experienced what is possible in creating a piece of work scanning multiple decades.
I didn't know anything about Hoffman when I started this book. I just picked it up, waited to see where it would take me, and found myself quickly affected by its candor and emotion.
After his father's death, Hoffman finds himself grappling with his own father, his personal fatherhood, and his new grandson. His stories are harrowing, growing up with two brothers with Muscular Dystrophy who both died young, getting sucked into and then out of alcoholism, seeing his own mistakes come again through his children.
It's an utterly open memoir, in a way that most aren't. It opens wide his own life but all those around him and can't help but leave you feeling a little raw.
I was not familiar with the works of poet/author Richard Hoffman so I was a bit hesitant to read his memoir. However, it was not a concern as I quickly found myself wrapped up in his story and reflections of what it means to be his father's son. The writing is superb and though the narrative leaps about and sometimes repeats itself, the theme is clear. Mr. Hofffman's family life seems pretty ordinary on the surface but still waters run deep and we quickly learn that nothing is ever easy with his father or becoming a father himself.
A lovely memoir of a son trying to live beyond his father's influence. Hoffman presents his father in a very real light: he is gruff, volatile, and angry, but he is also a lonely man who listens to his TV too loud, and sacrifices to keep his family clothed and fed. Hoffman realizes how his father's flaws have made him who he is, and his struggles to become his own person, and still deal with his father's shifting moods, all while raising his own family are very well presented.
Wonderful! Brilliant! Part memoir, part social commentary, part self-help/acceptance book...explores the challenges of being a son/father/brother/friend/grandfather and the difficulties of viewing your family, specifically your father, as the person you knew versus the person they really were. Having an open, honest dialogue with yourself about your past and the things that have formed you can be very difficult, but to put them on paper for the world to read is very brave.
I love this beautiful, honest memoir. The reflections on boyhood -- and being a man -- will break your heart. "Grief has always seemed to me to be love made briefly visible, like a crackling tree of lightning forking across the night sky."--Richard Hoffman
I love this book because it never skates on the surface of the events being described. The author always goes deeper. Love and Fury feels like a long essay, a memoir-essay, if you will. That's another reason to read this book.
I won this book from Goodreads some time ago and just now got too it. It had some interesting points, but he makes it a point from the start that he is an athiest, which I think gives it a different perspective than that of a Christian. Would I read it again? Probably not. But overall, it did have some interesting points.
I feel like there's not much about this book I can say that hasn't already been addressed.It's straightforward, it's blunt and moving, it examines relationships on a number of levels that lets you dive into Richard Hoffman's life. It's an enjoyable read with sweet anecdotes and heartfelt reflections.
In Love and Fury a man and his father struggle to understand one another in the troubled times after WWII in coal mining country. It is full of conflict, misunderstanding and emotions that reflect a difficult time of recovery for our country of an ordinary's lives.