embody: Learning to Love Your Unique Body

by Connie Sobczak

Embody: A Guide to Celebrating Your Unique Body (and quieting that critical voice!) brings to life the work of The Body Positive, a non-profit organization founded in 1996 by Connie Sobczak and Elizabeth Scott, LCSW.

This book’s message is rooted in the philosophy that people inherently possess the wisdom necessary to make healthy choices and to live in balance. It emphasizes that self-love, acceptance of genetic diversity in body size, celebration of the unique beauty of every individual, and intuitive self-care are fundamental to achieving good physical and emotional health. It encourages readers to shift their focus away from ineffective, harmful weight-loss efforts towards improving and sustaining positive self-care behaviors. Initial research indicates that this work significantly improves people’s ability to regulate eating, decreases depression and anxiety, and increases self-esteem—all critical resources that promote resiliency against eating and body image problems.

Embody guides readers step-by-step through the five core competencies of the Body Positive’s model: Reclaim Health, Practice Intuitive Self-Care, Cultivate Self-Love, Declare Your Own Authentic Beauty, and Build Community. These competencies are fundamental skills anyone can practice on a daily basis to honor their innate wisdom and take good care of their whole selves because they are motivated by self-love and appreciation. Rather than dictating a prescriptive set of rules to follow, readers are guided through patient, mindful inquiry to find what works uniquely in their own lives to bring about—and sustain—positive self-care changes and a peaceful relationship with their bodies.

Through workshops, lectures, and leadership trainings, Sobczak and Scott have helped thousands of people of all sizes, ages, sexual orientations, genders, ethnicities, and socioeconomic levels to lead healthier and more meaningful lives by learning how to cherish their unique bodies—no small task given today’s barrage of thin images and emphasis on dieting.

Embody offers practical tools as well as personal stories to bring Sobczak and Scott’s work into one’s own life. It is a resource that can be read cover to cover as well as revisited time again while moving through the inevitable changes that come with personal growth. A lifeboat in the sea of messages that demean the bodies of both men and women, Embody is a safe haven for all.

Genres: Self Help, Nonfiction, Health, Psychology, Nutrition, Science

288 pages, Paperback

First published May 19, 2014

About the author

Connie Sobczak is a mentor, writer, and award-winning video producer. Together with Elizabeth Scott, LCSW, Connie co-founded The Body Positive, a non-profit organization that has helped thousands of adults, teens, and children turn away from body dissatisfaction and self-criticism to live with joy and purpose.

Reviews

[agatha · Rating 4 out of 5]

I found a lot of things useful, but a lot of it didn’t really apply to me.
I love the idea of intuitive eating, i never really thought about it like that. I struggle with eating and hunger, i constantly restrict certain foods and push myself to eat other foods. Im really underweight, so I often try to push myself to eat until I throw up. Other days I won’t eat at all because of the fear of change. This all of course lead to an eating disorder, and it’s been a struggle to come back to healthy eating. Reading the chapters about eating has helped me to journal about eating to be more conscious, and create better habits by challenging what my anxiety wants me to do.
A lot of this book seems to focus on the weight loss and people’s obsession with being skinny, which I found really sad, but I couldn’t really relate to. For anyone who struggles with these feelings, I definitely recommend this book for you. I struggle with the need to gain weight, so I could kind of apply the logic, but it didn’t completely resonate with me.
I took a few other concepts and discussed them in therapy and with my boyfriend. My therapist was able to give me more advice based on some of these concepts, so that’s great. My boyfriend is going to help support me and reinforce positive affirmations (I love you Will!)
Thanks for helping kick start my recovery, Embody!

[Jacquie · Rating 5 out of 5]

Finally, a healthy, practical and intuitive approach to addressing challenges with self-imagine. A movement towards self-love and health at every size. A book that challenges the normal ways of dealing with this topic is especially important in a society where pockets are fattened by body dissatisfaction and all things “change your body”. I especially like the emphasis on how self-love does not equate to conceit, and the importance of surrounding ourselves with individuals who get this, and who are also committed against normalizing their critical, shaming inner voice. There are so many good things about this book! As a psychotherapist, I would recommend it to all of my clients (because we all battle to varying degrees against our body-shaming/blaming critical voice and subsequent behaviors). Bring on the freedom! We really can love ourselves as we would a dear friend. 💕

[Casey Frank · Rating 5 out of 5]

I read this book as a part of the curriculum for the
Ophelia's Place Certificate Program
I wish that I had been introduced to this book a few years ago when I first turned away from diet culture and began the process of renegotiating my relationship with food and with my body. Many of the tools presented in the book are things I came to better understand while in therapy, rather than through this reading, but it gives me hope that others would find it helpful.
It can feel deeply uncomfortable to explore ideas about self love, that even the phrase itself conjures a sense of "ick" that comes from talking about love or feelings in general, but finding and believing in intrinsic self worth yields positive results in every aspect of your life, from your mental health, to how you exist inside your body, to your relationship with others.

[Lisa Marie Walters · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book is very special and important to me because it’s the first book my therapist suggested to me on my first day of therapy for my eating disorder and body dysmorphia. Reading the first few chapters helped me finally visualize a future for myself where I spend less time worried about how I look and have more time and energy to focus on how I feel and what it’s like to be more present in my life. It helped me find the words I needed to understand what I’ve been going through and communicate that to my therapist. So much of this book was a really big help to me.

However, as a disabled woman I found it lacking in areas. Lots of emphasis on body movement and self-love that felt like they didn’t translate for me as a person in a body that doesn’t move freely like others and that causes me pain and distress. There were also some ableist words peppered throughout the book. At one point “disability” was instead described as “differently-abledness” which always makes me feel like I won’t be understood by the person who uses that term.

Overall I think this book serves as a great jumping off point and is an excellent reference book to help someone better understand what is happening to them when they have negative body image and eating disorders. I’m thankful it was recommended to me and I’ll refer back to it often.

[Paula Hagar · Rating 5 out of 5]

I worked with this book over 8 weeks in a group called "Learning to Love your Body." This book was the perfect accompaniment to the group. Although it's definitely most geared toward those with eating disorders, don't we all have at least some amount of body dysmorphia? In this society I believe so, and this book is geared toward learning to love YOURSELF (and hence your body) despite what the media and society in general tells us about what the perfect body is or must look like. It has taught me the importance of learning to love and forgive myself for beating up on myself so brutally in my life because I don't have the perfect body.

[mich tonks · Rating 4 out of 5]

GREAT book backed up by science, research and personal journey. I usually love "self-help" books that have a bit of personality. This one lacked that, but I sure enjoyed relating to various stories shared by both authors and leaders of the body positive movement. This gives you so many tools, and so many insights as to some of the thoughts we could have and... while reading i did not feel alone in this struggle. I loved it! The last competency i really didn't care for, so I never read it completely

[Brooklyn Van Antwerp · Rating 5 out of 5]

I’ve been reading this book with my therapist for the past 4 weeks. I can honestly say that this book has changed my way of looking at my body.
I’ve always had weight problems. All my life I’ve been the fat kid or girl/woman. My mom used to make offhanded comments about my weight and that made me feel even worse.
After reading Embody, I feel more In tune with my body. I’m not to the point where I love myself yet, but after reading this book, I finally have hope that someday I will.

[Jen Angel · Rating 3 out of 5]

I enjoyed the book and particularly liked the practical exercises at the end of each chapter.

However there was one section where the author encourages readers to take the advice Of doctors and scientists and figure out what works for you. And while in some contexts that makes sense, it felt like it could also support opposition to vaccines, which was a huge turn off for me.

[Lily L · Rating 3 out of 5]

I enjoyed this book and its message. You have to be in the mood to receive the information and lessons (something I struggled with, which is entirely on me). I felt the little stories of people’s experiences were helpful and relatable. I would like to read it again and complete the activities at some point to get the best experience possible.

[Catrina Berka · Rating 3 out of 5]

I liked the journaling prompts and exercises at the end of each chapter, but it was really similar to The Wisdom of Your Body and not as good. This was much more an overt commercial for their Body Positive movement. Not bad, but there are better books on the topic I’d recommend first.

[Katie Hamby · Rating 5 out of 5]

This was a massively helpful book for recovering from my body image issues and ED. I like that a significant portion of the book involves learning to see yourself as beautiful. Most ED recovery books tend towards neutrality but I prefer this aspect.

[Kathleen · Rating 4 out of 5]

Read this to gain more information/insight/knowledge for a class I'll be leading later this semester. Really enjoyed this one.

[Stefanie · Rating 5 out of 5]

To date, my favorite book on body image,creating body acceptance and promoting body positivity

[Marina Arreola · Rating 5 out of 5]

Me quedo con la frase de:
Deslinda la palabra dieta cuando hablas de amor propio.

[Jamie · Rating 4 out of 5]

Read as part of book club with patients at 'Ai Pono. They really enjoyed this book - will use it again!

[Narysmellsbee · Rating 3 out of 5]

A good message. Overall I'm glad I read it. Referencing astrology was a big turnoff for me. This book could have used more evidence based support to make it stronger.

[Sabrina Owens · Rating 2 out of 5]

To me the information felt fairly shallow and messily presented. This is a good introduction to embodiment work, but I personally did not find it useful or satisfying to read.

[Zoë Chatterton · Rating 2 out of 5]

Had some good tidbits, but felt like a huge ad for their ‘body positive movement’. Felt shallow most of the time.

[Alexis Siurek · Rating 3 out of 5]

recommended read by my nutritionist, good reminders + helpful activities

[Elisabeth Valienne · Rating 4 out of 5]

Great book to introduce the concept of self love with actionable steps either for an individual or for counselors!

[Sally · Rating 3 out of 5]

An important subject, especially for people in their teens and twenties. While the book is addressed largely to those with eating disorders and body image problems, it has something to say to all whose self-opinion is dependent on meeting societal and media standards for the body.

[Michelle · Rating 5 out of 5]

A must-read for every person struggling with a poor body image or other thoughts that create barriers to a positive sense of self.