This book was my first take at Cowboys love, at first I really liked how the relationship between Tor & Jake was developing, Two Alpha males both hot for each other and Strong willed, and the book was amazing at first, really awesome how they started they relationship until they committed to each other, but just when the dead ex-boyfriend subplot starts, it all began to go downhill, and as i continued reading it got worst, Tor took the dominant role in the relationship, Jake topping less and less, but when the foursome happened tor actually bottomed for the other couple top guy, and yes, this may sound stupid but I'm a very equally guy, so I would have liked for Tor to Top him too, as the book goes on, it feels like it had too much sex, like if all the relationship between Jake & Tor was solely based on sex, i kind of understand that Chris Owen was doing this to make us see that they were falling apart each other, but still, then the betray happened, and I must say it it was very stupid of Tor, but as he later stated it, he wanted Jake to find him, to hurt him, but I still CAN'T forgive it!, the reason why Tor supposedly did it was very stupid to me, more so because how he reacted when Jake found it, wanting to mend up everything, i just couldn't understand it, and i'm very good and putting myself in someone else shoes, later when they break up Tor DOESN'T TELL HIS FAMILY, who still believes they are together when they call, making Jake feel worse.
When Jake shows his backbone i feel very proud of him, when Tor tells him he let Travis fuck him is is subtle but very important, because to me it felt like Jake was holding into a very little hope that tor didn't had share his entire body with Travis, when Tor confirms it, it was all over.
On a good note when the cheat happened I must say how Chris managed the feelings of Jake, they just flowed to me and even if i'm a 26 y/o guy, i've cried like a teenager, so emotionally bounded, because Jake gave himself completely to Tor, clean and without any mental baggage, but Tor was full of shit, Tor had Jake entirely for him, body & heart, but Jake had to share Tor's heart with a dead ex boyfriend who Tor was so adamant to not forget that it always bruised the relationship, and if I were Jake i would feel hurt as hell, but Jake put up with it because Tor's body was his, but then Tor was sharing his body with Travis, and I feel like he stripped Jake of everything, it wasn't just the cheat it was more that if Tor would never had been completely Jake's.
Then later when after a night together Tor finds that Jake could maybe never forgive him he goes away, later Kevin comes back, and I really couldn't wrap my mind about how he put himself in Tor's side, I just couldn't and then he and everyone else makes Jake feel like shit, to me it was like mental abuse, and this mental abuse is what in the end lets Jake put up with all the shit Tor has just because Tor loves him.
Then Chris tried to tie everything up with a problem of miscommunication but uh huh, while it was a problem, it wasn't the WHOLE problem, that was Tor's emotional baggage, his feeling for his ex, so sure, Tor swears he would never cheat Jake with someone else again alright, that doesn't mean Jake would not have to share him anymore, some people could say that his ex was his past & Jake is his present and future, like the author state it in the book, but it was a lie, because no matter how much time went, Tor would always carry his dead ex in him, and the worst was that that he would always make sure Jake remembered it, like he does again when they are back together, before people come and say to me that i don't understand how it feels, I've understand it, more than I wish to, so when someone dies, you can remember him, but you can't let it control you and affect your future, like Tor did, he was so obsessed with not forgetting him that it would always be a thorn in their relationship, and the fact that they didn't try to fix that problem, bugged me to no end, because in real life sooner or later it would be way to much, and would end up killing the relationship for good, and I expected that, but Jake changed so much and not in a good way, and with the mental abuse I said earlier, that it seemed almost like it was his job to put up with that, instead of trying to fix the problem, he lost a lot of his self-assurance and even went Tor went back, he was still a fucking bastard when it came to the dead ex.
There's something I have to say about this book and that is that no other book has ever affected me so emotionally strong as this book did, a shame it affected me in a bad way.
I've read the continuation of this book and the spin off, but just because i'm a freak of completion, there's a short story called Bad Pennies, where Travis shows up again, and that was the finishing blow, it made me super mad, I will not read another book by Chris Owen, sorry.