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399 pages, Kindle Edition
First published October 7, 2014






I’ve had enough,” I said to the sky, addressing the Judge, wherever she was. “I give up.”
The quiet hiss of waves was the only reply.
I rose to my feet and held out my arms. “I give up,” I shouted. “Do you hear me? I can’t do this!”
I threw back my head, waiting for the wind to carry me over, not caring where it took me as long as I didn’t have to feel this miserable loneliness anymore. “Come on,” I screamed at the Judge. “What are you waiting for?” I swayed in place, the toes of my boots right at the edge of the rocks. “Please,” I whispered. “I’m done.”
I’m in love with your strength, Malachi whispered back, an echo in my memory. I’m in love with your determination, the way you never ever give up.
The sob forced its way from my throat before I knew I was crying. I stumbled over a rock, landing hard on the gravel trail. I rolled to my back and looked up at the moon. He’d said that to me at the gates of the Mazikin city, trusting me to do everything I could to usher all those human souls to safety. I’d thought I had, but there were more people in danger right now.
Ian. Tegan. Diane. Henry. So many others who could still be saved—unless pretending was more important to me than their lives. Unless my desire for a few minutes of illusion was worth more than their safety. Unless my craving for escape outweighed my sense of duty.
“I don’t abandon my friends,” I said, my voice cracking. I slowly stood up and dusted off my pants. I was the disposable abandoned girl . . . I had been, at least. But I didn’t abandon people. I didn’t turn away. And I didn’t give up. “I will never give up,” I whispered.
“Lela,” he said tenderly. “You walked into hell for me. I fought my way out of heaven for you. No matter what happens, there is one thing I don’t doubt at all: we will find each other again.”