Hitchhiking with Larry David: An Accidental Tourist's Summer of Self-Discovery in Martha's Vineyard

by Paul Dolman

A memoir about a brokenhearted, middle-aged man who stumbles upon solace, meaning, and Larry David while hitchhiking around Martha’s Vineyard 
 
One summer day on Martha’s Vineyard Paul Samuel Dolman was hitchhiking, and none other than Larry David pulled over and asked, “You’re not a serial killer or something, are you?” The comedic writer and actor not only gave Dolman a ride but helped him find his way.
 
Dolman found himself on Martha’s Vineyard that summer in the wake of a painful breakup. Desperately seeking companionship, he began hitchhiking around the island and met a wide array of characters: the rich and the homeless, movie stars and common folk, and, of course, Mr. David.
 
Written with disarming honest humor, Hitchhiking with Larry David will leave readers simultaneously laughing and crying as they ponder the mystery and spirituality of life.

Genres: Memoir, Nonfiction, Humor, Biography, Comedy, Book Club, Biography Memoir

256 pages, Paperback

First published July 11, 2010

Reviews

[Megan Johnson · Rating 1 out of 5]

needs more larry david, less spiritual boring shit. yeah i said it. come at me, bro.

[Anna · Rating 1 out of 5]

I just can't finish this book. I have too many to read to waste another minute on it. All of his "interactions" and conversations are so contrived. I don't buy it, I don't. I was going to power through but I'm about 3/4 done and I barely remember what I read. I'm throwing in the towel.

[Alisa · Rating 1 out of 5]

When you put Larry David's name in your book title, people are going to have high expectations. This was a surprisingly boring book, I probably wouldn't have finished it if I wasn't trapped in a car with my family for 2 days.

[Joanne · Rating 2 out of 5]

This is not a book about hitchhiking and this is not a book about Larry David. This is the story of a very privileged white American male who is trying to deal with the heartache of not being able to commit to the woman he loves. He hangs out where the wealthy are vacationing, bumps into celebrities, chats, makes friends and tries to figure out what it all means. If you can get over the incredible amount of privilege you might be able to empathize with the struggles he faces with his parents.

[Renee · Rating 2 out of 5]

I've tried two times to read this book. I guess I just don't care about the author. Other then the short encounter w Larry David the rest was too boring to finish.

[Joseph · Rating 5 out of 5]

I encountered an autographed version of this book in a tiny free library outside of a park in West Roxbury, Massachusetts. I intend to add some books from my own personal collection as means to replace the shifts in energy.

This book is a quick read and a lot of fun. There are some wonderful nuggets of happenstance, karma, and philosophy.

"Umm... You're not a serial killer or something, are you?" (3)

"I miss being a part of something greater than myself. Of belonging to a larger conversation than the one about me." (77)

"The imperial Prisoner of the United States has a lot less freedom than meaningless old me." (177)

"All these small acts make the world go around." (183)

The ending reminds me of High Fidelity a great deal, but I just wish there was more Larry David.

Update: got a friendly e-mail response back from Paul after just a few days. Major bonus points.

[Tasha · Rating 5 out of 5]

This memoir of a summer on Martha's Vineyard is an enjoyable tale of serendipity framed by a single car ride that the author shared with comedian Larry David. While coming to terms with his relationship with his parents and a recent break-up, Paul Samuel Dolman weaves humorous antidotes with scenes from his past and self-help quotes from his extensive reading.

In one of his final moments enjoying the natural environment of the vineyard, Dolman reflects that "true freedom comes not in finding the answers, but from joyfully living with the questions." As a summer hitchhiker, Dolman shares these questions with everyone that he encounters and subtly underscores our interconnectedness. While his conclusions may be familiar, his wit is fresh.

[Chris Tango · Rating 2 out of 5]

This book made me want to go to Nantucket.

[Matt · Rating 3 out of 5]

I selected to read this book because I have heard of Larry David prior to reading it. I also I live kind of close to Martha’s Vineyard and I thought that I would be more connected to the book because of that.
This book is about a middle-aged man who is trying to discover himself while visiting his parents in Martha’s Vineyard. He and his long-time girlfriend broke up and he goes to his parent’s house in Martha’s Vineyard to relax. The author likes to get around places by hitchhiking and Larry David picks him up. The author asks Larry a series of questions until he reaches his destination. Following this event, he has a series of interactions with other people on the island.
I liked that even though Larry David wasn’t in much of the story, he and his shows were still referenced throughout the book. That helped the lack of his presence in the story. I also liked the humor that was in the book. It rarely felt like it was forced and seemed genuine.
The main thing that I had a problem with this book is how little Larry David was actually in it. I was expecting that he would be in the majority of the story based on the fact that he is in the title but he is only in around 20 pages. Considering that the reason I read this book was for Larry David this was pretty disappointing. Also, most of the author's interactions seemed unrealistic and the dialogue seems like it came out of a fiction book and not a true story.

[Justin Carboneau · Rating 5 out of 5]

I picked this book up at the library the night before going to the beach. It turned out to be a great beach book. Really funny, heartfelt, emotional and enjoyable.

I've started writing down a few key takeaways from each book I read as a way to preserve the lessons I've learned. Here we go:

- Give people the benefit of the doubt. You never know what people have been through and what they're dealing with.

- Parents aren't perfect. We can't expect them to love us perfectly. We can only appreciate all the sacrifices they made for us.

- Relationships take hard work, but they are well worth the work.

- I want to develop the author's ability to talk to strangers. It's amazing who you can meet and the experiences you can have when you're willing to take a few social risks.

[Rashmi Chaudhry · Rating 1 out of 5]

The book has nothing to offer. I still read through it partly because I have an obsession of finishing what I start and partly because I kept waiting for the book to pick up. Towards the end I persevered only so I could give an honest review.

Though reading the book didn't enrich me, I do hope writing it made the author a better person. It takes courage to write and be seen.

[Melissa · Rating 2 out of 5]

Fun to read while on MV but had trouble with the pondering over happiness while name dropping left and right.

[Bobbi · Rating 3 out of 5]

I liked this book way more than I expected. I was thankfully made aware, having read several reviews warning that Larry David had little part in the book. The story revolves around a young man, recently having ended a relationship and returning to his parents’ home in Martha’s Vineyard. His interactions on the island, hitchhiking, with people he knows, with strangers, is the structure of the book, and the way he finds his way.

[Madeleine Black · Rating 5 out of 5]

I recently 'met' the author Paul in the Twitter world and have had a phone conversation with him prior to an interview to be a guest on one of his podcast's on his website. I loved reading his book as I could hear him so clearly from his words on the pages! He is funny, sensitive and enquiring. Always looking to understand life and grow. A lot of wisdom throughout the book

"Just stay open, because you never know when the magic will happen"

[Jacqueline Boss · Rating 5 out of 5]

So much laughing out loud. Recommended to Hrothgar! Enlightenment is funny!

[Sammy · Rating 5 out of 5]

Both hilarious and heartbreaking, Hitchhiking With Larry David is that rare book that will move you from laughter to tears and back again, sometimes on the same page. The ultimate accidental tourist on life’s most important journey, it’s an engaging and entertaining trip into a world filled with the rich, famous and powerful, and of course…Larry David!

Written with disarming honesty, this beautifully crafted story uncovers the uniqueness of a family’s love and the universality of its struggles. Hitchhiking With Larry David is an emotional page-turner and a celebration of what matters most...

[David Meyer · Rating 2 out of 5]

I bought this book hoping for more Larry David than I got. The book follows the author's experience spending the summer in Martha's Vineyard where the reader gets to watch him feel sorry for himself while dealing with the effects of a bad break up. During this time, he randomly bumps into numerous celebrities (who he seems to love namedropping) as well as making friends with billionaires (and millionaires who are upset to not yet be billionaires). The conversations seem insincere and made up (no one talks that way). As a reader, you know you are supposed to feel sorry for this guy, but he just doesn't make it possible.

[Amber · Rating 5 out of 5]

Fantastic book about the Vineyard by my friend and author, Paul Dolman. A quick read, perfect for your Martha's Vineyard vacation:-)

[Billie Weise · Rating 5 out of 5]

If you want to laugh...

[Tom Prewitt · Rating 5 out of 5]

A great book to read to your girl friend on a sultry summer night...

[Tracy · Rating 5 out of 5]

Hysterical ~ loved it!! I read it while I was vacationing on the Vineyard, so that made it even more enjoyable!!! For all you Vineyard lovers out there, this is a must read!

[Angela · Rating 4 out of 5]

Easy, fun read. Interesting perspective. Jerry Seinfeld-like.

[Tim Dimo · Rating 3 out of 5]

The title is a bit misleading but I suppose "Bumping Into Larry David" wouldn't have been as compelling.

[Mediaman · Rating 2 out of 5]

Partially interesting book that fails to live up to its title and is flawed in its presentation.

There is very little in this book about Larry David. The author spends a half hour with David on a car ride, and otherwise just runs into him a few random times on Martha's Vineyard without any real conversation. Dolman claims to have never seen an episode of Curb Your Enthusiams or Seinfeld (not even a couple minutes, which is hard to believe since his parents are addicted to it and he lives with them) and shockingly claims to not even recognize Jerry Seinfeld on the TV when he sees them watching. But he does recognize everyday schlub Larry David, who stops to pick him up hitchhiking?

Some of this is implausible and comes across as a fictionalized memoir. There are a lot of coincidences and things that happen in what appear to be a compressed time period for storytelling purposes. Namely, take much of it with a grain of salt.

Dolman is a well-off guy who in his 40s decides he's tired of the rat race, shuts down his business to search for the meaning of life, after a breakup with the love of his life goes to mooch off his well-off parents on the island (they also have a place in Florida) and he meets all sorts of rich and famous people. Dolman tries to preach messages about providential meetings and the meaning of life but has such a vague handle on spirituality that there's no real conclusion or point to the book.

There is not a consistent narrative and passages are mixed in that involve either his past or his longtime love named Miracle. The book devolves into childhood memories combined with a quasi-love story. The problem is the writer fails to end many of his stories nor gives enough details to make sense of some, mixes up chronology, introduces characters that are not fully formed, and ultimately tries to make himself look like a Messiah walking the roads with his thumb out, bringing peace through spiritual questions asked of billionaires with private beaches that pick up hitchhikers. Like I said, it lacks credulity.

In the hands of a better writer this could have worked. But Dolman even wrecks the ending of the book, refusing to give details of the aftermath of leaving the island in love with his former girlfriend and using only one sentence to allude to his returning the next year to finally have lunch with Larry David on the island. Huh? Why are details of that not in the book and why no true conclusion of what he learned from the comedy writer?

Are there some good points made? Yes, three or four times you're made to think about life or relationships. When people drive you crazy and you want to blow your stack, simply respond, "Is that so?" Your insecurities can sabotage your relationships and become self-fulfilling. When meeting famous rich people never ask anything of them and they will take you under their wing. Then there's one that he doesn't mention but is obvious--don't expect your elderly parents to be the way they were when younger nor try to be spontaneous with those that want daily structure.

There are also some unnecessary asides supporting leftist politics. I get that Martha's Vineyard is full of liberals and Democrats with serious problems like trespassers on private beaches, hiring illegal alien staff to clean the mansions (yes, Phil Donahue is in the book and Dolman gives him huge praise, ignoring the man's total misdeeds), or the rising costs of private jet fuel. But instead of admiring these hypocrites why doesn't Dolman call them on their attempt to use the government (and taxpayers' money) to push the progressive agenda instead of solving the issues with their own big bucks?

While he seems thrilled with generous left-wingers he doesn't know, there is too much negativity involving his penny-pinching parents, mixed with his own self-promotion as being a lovable mooching drifter. I ended up seeing him as being a real loser who claimed to befriend strangers because he takes nothing personally, yet he takes virtually everything personally when it comes to his girlfriend and his aging, tired parents. I wish he treated those close to him as well as he did the rich strangers he encountered on Martha's Vineyard. Even grouchy jerk Larry David gets unnecessary praise while Dolman's father (with a similar personality) gets nothing but criticism.

It's not ironic that the only time he says anything nice about his dad is when his father accidentally picks the author up while hitchhiking. Maybe the real lesson that needs to be learned is to treat family members that you mooch off of better than you treat rich strangers that you mooch off of. But I guess "Hitchhiking with My Father" or "Mooching Off My Parents" wouldn't have been as interesting of a title to publishers.

[Lisa Ferretti · Rating 3 out of 5]

I heard about this book from the author himself. I had the good fortune to be house-sitting on Martha's Vineyard, and had brought my elderly mother along. She was sitting in a beach chair while I was standing in the water, near someone who turned out to be Paul Dolman. Just as you would expect from the book, Paul is a friendly guy with whom it's easy to fall into a real conversation. I remember we touched on how important and hard it is to take care of our aging parents.

It turned out that the person I was house-sitting for had the book, and allowed me to borrow it. It's an especially fun read if you are familiar with the landmarks mentioned in the book. I'm not sure how it would play to someone who has never been to the Vineyard.

There are a lot of thought-inspiring ideas and encounters in the book. Plus humor -- often at the expense of the author's parents, and I wondered what people who knew them thought when they read the book. Also humor at the author's expense, and at the absurdity of life, both of which were more enjoyable to read.

The book raised conflicting reactions in me. I love synchronicities and those times when miracles seem to manifest. The author's summer abounds in such magic. Yet I can't separate out how much easier it is to be open to miracles when you have privilege, such as white skin, a financial cushion, and a summer free of job responsibilities. As a woman, I would not have felt safe hitchhiking solo around the island the way the author did. (Decades ago there was a live interview with Shirley MacLaine, the actor and popular proponent of metaphysics. A woman called into the show MacLaine was being interviewed on. The caller talked about how she didn't have a lot of time and energy left over for things like creative visualization, as she was busy struggling to feed her kids, pay her bills, and avoid being evicted. MacLaine's clueless response was basically that the caller wasn't meditating enough.) Yes, there is a homeless woman in the book, whose life eventually seems to get turned around; the author was kind and helpful to her. But I would have appreciated more acknowledgment of the difference privilege makes. There is mention of how millionaires are still not satisfied on a deep level. I get the point, but can we admit there's a huge advantage in never having to worry about basic life necessities like food and housing?

A comment about the structure rather than the content of the book: there are many distracting typos and other quirks that cry out for a good copy editor. I was surprised to see editors were credited in the acknowledgments, as they clearly missed a lot. Perhaps these mistakes were corrected in later issues of the book?

[K · Rating 1 out of 5]

About 15 years ago, maybe 20 years, I read an essay by a struggling sportswriter and novelist. He had been given some type of assignment to attend a press conference with Muhammad Ali. He was captivated by the scene, as so many others have been in Ali's presence. For some reason, Ali took a liking to the guy and allowed him to do a profile for a magazine. That led to another profile and, eventually, a book. With those credits in his portfolio, the guy built a career. His essay was about how Ali changed lives, including his, and about the magic of being Ali's circle, even as a person who was, to some degree, using Ali for his benefit.

This book is similar. A guy who's struggling meets a famous person, and that person shows him kindness and courtesy. The guy writes a book about it, not exploiting the famous person but sharing how that person touched him.

Unfortunately, in this case it's totally flat. I couldn't read three consecutive pages. I skipped around a few times, seeking some type of spark, and it wasn't there. The author is boring, and his descriptions of scenery are monotonous, and his life even less interesting. This book left me as cold as a Cape Code winter's day. Don't bother to pick it up, even at a used book sale.

[Barbara · Rating 4 out of 5]

Having spent at least ten summer vacations on MVY, this was a fun read. It's not actually about Larry David, though, so curb your enthusiasm. :)

I don't actually know who the author is, but I enjoyed his description of the wild places of the vineyard, and having run into Bill Murray once at Alley's Market, all of his chance encounters made complete sense. I was actually reading this on the vineyard, and made sure to go to Chilmark store to see if LD was there himself, but alas, it was just a crowded tiny market full of hungry tourists.

I also enjoyed the author's introspection and philosophical takes on life. I like a book that makes me think and feel, and this one did that. Well done.

[Leah · Rating 3 out of 5]

One of the fun parts of traveling is reading books set in or describing the area. This is more difficult in some places where there isn't an abundance of literature with the setting I am seeking. In the case of my most recent trip, this was the only book that was readily available set in or about Martha's Vineyard. I finished reading upon my return, after enjoying a thorough tour to the far corners of the island. Beyond that, I agree with the criticisms of other readers. No need to repeat what others have spelled out so clearly.

[Andy Porter · Rating 3 out of 5]

For sure closer to 3.5 or 3.75. Just never really seemed to really capture me until the end.

However it did really make me look at my relationships with people and think about what he calls his miracle. It also is written in a utopia of no work but seemingly unlimited money and no worries. He addresses this in the epilogue by showing that people in that setting are far more relaxed and willing to talk to anyone. Whether that is Ted Danson or a homeless woman. It creates a tension of wanting that in daily life and wondering why it doesn’t happen more.

[Patti · Rating 4 out of 5]

I got this book at the library as it seemed a lightweight "summer read" and it was. It also had many insightful messages which helped me to relax into the moment. If you are a Type A personality looking to move up the ladder by stepping on others to get to the top, this is probably not the book for you. But if you care about other people and want to get to know them each on their own in a just the moments you have together, this author shows you it can be done and you can make a ripple in the world you live in.