Plastikowe M3, czyli czeska pornografia

by Petra Hůlová

Bohaterka książki - trzydziestoletnia praska prostytutka, w lekko postrzelonym, odważnym monologu z ironią, celnością i wyjątkową fantazją słowotwórczą odkrywa tajemnice najstarszego zawodu świata. Bez ogródek opisuje często fałszywą pieśń "wtykacza" (wagina) i "raszpli" (penis). Jednocześnie dzieli się krytycznymi uwagami o otaczającym nas bezdusznym "digiświecie" i z troską daje przydatne, choć kontrowersyjne, rady dotyczące relacji damsko-męskich. Humor, dystans, barwne neologizmy opisujące "te sprawy" i oryginalna narracja sprawiają, że Plastikowe M3, czyli czeska pornografia nie jest obsceniczną lekturą dla panów, ale świetną zabawą, choć już po pierwszych kilku stronach czytelnika zaczyna nurtować pytanie, czy autorka przypadkiem nie robi sobie z niego jaj...

Genres: Fiction, Czech Literature, Prostitution, Contemporary

159 pages, Hardcover

First published January 1, 2006

About the author

Po maturitě na gymnáziu a neúspěšném pokusu studovat Fakultu sociálních věd Univerzity Karlovy studovala kulturologii na Filozofické fakultě téže univerzity, později přidala i mongolistiku. V letech 2000 až 2001 pobývala v Mongolsku, kde se odehrává děj jejího prvního románu, Paměť mojí babičce, jenž autorku proslavil.

Pobývala také ve Spojených státech amerických, kde se odehrává děj její knihy Cirkus Les Mémoires.

V současnosti studuje kulturologii na Filozofické fakultě Univerzity Karlovy v doktorandském programu. Od roku 2007 pravidelně přispívá do časopisu Respekt. Žije v Praze.

Ocenění
Spisovatelčin debut Paměť mojí babičce získal cenu Magnesia Litera v kategorii Objev roku a zvítězil v anketě Lidových novin Kniha roku. Próza Umělohmotný třípokoj získala Cenu Jiřího Ortena. Hůlová získala v roce 2008 Cena Josefa Škvoreckého za román Stanice Tajga.

Reviews

[♑︎♑︎♑︎ ♑︎♑︎♑︎ · Rating 5 out of 5]

Three Plastic Rooms by Petra Hůlová is the story of an aging prostitute and her relationship with her own body, a novel rendered from Czech into hauntingly poetic English by Alex Zucker. Oh, my goodness. How can there exist a novel that is at once so open to beauty and yet in which every sentence is some new shocker? Here you go. This is that book. It’s the kind of book that nineteen out of twenty readers will say is too upsetting to love, or maybe even to finish, and the twentieth person will say "this book changed my life" or maybe: "this book convinces me that we are nowhere near the end as a species of exploring all the ways human language can be called upon to express new things."

As I write this, there has not been a single review of the novel on Amazon, which is surprising. It seems the book that would make people angry enough to write about it. Let’s see. It’s the kind of book that you can open on any page and be unbelievably disturbed. Let me try now:

the true mumsyfuckers have enough of that little drama at home, and the fuckshop, a quiet backwater of kissed knees, offers a gulf of solace, because what an orgasm means to these men’s wives was drilled into their heads by all those sex scene disasters you see at the multiplex, which whenever they happen my sticker-inner farts with laughter in my seat, and I would only be willing to moan during them, as I said, for the enjoyment of a man all my very own, so that sitting there in the seat next to me, in the dark, he would get an urge to stroke himself, or maybe just enjoy my sights, or maybe all of me, or, sigh, even love me.

I'm amazed this writing, for the way the harshness of the language resolves suddenly into vulnerability and poetry at the end of this paragraph...and also, damn, I'm amazed by translator Alex Zucker that he has done such an amazing job making this writing accessible to me.

Wonderful. Harsh and nearly unreadable at times but I'm so glad to have read it.

[Meike · Rating 4 out of 5]

Czech transgressive literature: This slim novel is extremely challenging and uneasy, but also really innovative and intriguing. Our narrator is a 30-year-old prostitute in Prague who means business, as she is fully aware that she is renting out her body as merchandise. She doesn't hold back when it comes to describing what men look for when they visit her fuckshop (her words, not mine), the title-giving three-room apartment furnished with anonymous, artificial objects - even the caged bird is made in China. The drastic stream-of-consciousness develops a sound of its own that is full of creative twists, most notably the way the protagonist talks about genitalia: The pronoun of her "sticker-inner" is he, while the visiting "hammers" are ascribed to be female, so referred to as she (please notice the plastic hammers on the cover; nice one!). This is not your cliched tale about an entrapped victim, it's way more layered than that.

When she is not working, the narrator, who fears her own physical deterioration because it's obviously bad for business, indulges in shopping/consumerism and rants about pedophiles (we frequently hear the argument that her job protects children from creeps) as well as the digitalized, alienated world, which begs questions regarding the product she sells, and she is all too aware of that. There is also quite some stuff in there where the narrator muses about the failures of wives/girlfriends, and it's oh-so-Michel Houellebecq-ian. I was fascinated by the particular, flowing, extreme language (I'm sure Virginie Despentes would be a fan) and the many contradictions and intellectual twists and turns that render the prostitute so interesting.

Disturbing in the best way, and aesthetically forward-thinking. If it's too strong, you're too weak.

[Left Coast Justin · Rating 4 out of 5]

So, what's really running through a prostitute's mind while you're ramming away behind her, showing her who's boss?

One of the most popular routines, for instance, was pretend rape during housework. One client even brought a washboard with him and hammered me over the edge of the bathtub, not the sink, he said, the angle wasn't sharp enough, I needed to be bent over some more, so he hammered me on the tub while I washed my laundry which, as it happened, I needed to do anyway.

This is definitely not going to be everybody's cup of tea, and it really wasn't mine, either, but in the end I have to tip my cap to the author's skill and rate it better than average. The excerpt supra sums up the book pretty well, I think. There is no plot, there is only the author's voice, telling us about her daily life and her worldview.

Likes
-Shopping, particularly for clothes and shoes
-Having a clean apartment
-Finishing all her housework
-Satisfied clients (because satisfied clients go home, allowing her to indulge in her other likes)

Dislikes
-Gossipy menopausal women in her apartment building
-Underage sex
-Open-floorplan housing
-Anal sex

My paperback copy is 168 pages long, and I feel it would take about 160 pages to summarize it. The narrator calls herself, without irony, a "professsional woman" and takes pains (sometimes literally) to improve her customer service. She appears to feel neither shame nor pride in her job, regards clients as problems to be solved as efficiently as possible, and doesn't spend a whole lot of time pondering other ways she might be living her life.

For all that, it's an oddly affecting little book, perhaps because those of us who feel inclined to "rescue" or even just feel sorry for women like this are not offered the slightest handhold. A truly hardened heart feels neither hatred nor self-hatred, neither pity nor self-pity. She just wants you to finish your business and go away. This is the sex industry's version of Murderbot.

[Lori · Rating 5 out of 5]

review to come

[Brad · Rating 3 out of 5]

I walk away from Three Plastic Rooms feeling (and this isn't the first time a book has made me feel this way) like an unwelcome interloper. This book wasn't for me. It's not that I didn't appreciate the book, nor is it that it didn't speak to me, but it is a more literal recognition that Petra Hůlová didn't intend me to be her audience. This book wasn't written for me.

Yes I have Czech ancestry and Hůlová is a Czech writer, but my experience with Czech culture is all superficial. I have dreams of returning to my ancestral roots, but those dreams are a long, far way off. I've never lived there, never visited, and have no first had experience with Czech culture; Hůlová was definitely writing for Czechs. But she was also writing for Czech women (I imagine) and I am not a Czech woman, but a Canadian man. And while I am friendly to and with sex workers, I am not a sex worker and Hůlová was certainly writing with them in mind too. I am also not a linguist, though I enjoy dabbling in linguistics from time to time, and I don't have nearly enough linguistic skill to fully appreciate -- especially in an English translation of Czech writing -- the play Hůlová was engaging in with her words (despite translator Alex Zucker's helpful afterword); moreover, I get a sense that much of what Hůlová was doing was rooted in the works of Hélène Cixous, meaning that Hůlová was also writing for a specific flavour of feminist, a spicier flavour than my vanilla-femanism.

I feel a little like I stumbled into a room where folks I'd only just met were having really messy sex, and instead of backing out and quietly closing the door, I pulled up a chair at the end of the bed and tried to figure out what each toy was for, how to perform each position, and who was going to clean up the mess they were making afterwords.

Yet for all that I can't help admitting that Three Plastic Rooms was a fascinating and rewarding, albeit uncomfortable, read. It makes me wish I could read Czech. I think then I would have a better grip on how welcome I would be as a reader of Hůlová's work.

[A.M. Bakalar · Rating 4 out of 5]

My review of Petra Hůlová's Three Plastic Rooms, translated by Alex Zucker, in LA Review of Books:
https://lareviewofbooks.org/article/p...

'To read Petra Hůlová’s Three Plastic Rooms is to enter the disquieting mind of a 30-year-old prostitute as she muses on the state of her business and relentlessly battles the specter of aging. It is a journey through a person’s soul in search of something resembling happiness and humanity in the gloating world of capitalism. Three Plastic Rooms is a frighteningly honest novel — not easy to like, but impossible not to appreciate. (…) Three Plastic Rooms may be her most original work, partly because it is a spectacular linguistic achievement, delivered in a pitch-perfect monologue.'

[Emma Sea]

no English kindle edition? And not in any of my libraries :(
I don't want to pay NZ$21 and wait 3 weeks for a dead tree copy.

[Tova · Rating 4 out of 5]

Loved it. I think . So confused. Översättningen var magisk <3. Lots of WTF-moments, do not read if easily disturbed.

[Frank Robinson · Rating 5 out of 5]

‘Weirdly compelling with a shocking twist at the end’
Petra Hulova’s unique imagination brings the inner monologue of an aging Prague prostitute to life. Her character’s thoughts meander from the tools of her trade though to the purchase and use of handbags and philosophical explanations of sodomy, pedophilia, materialism, whipping and even office romances consummated in locked store rooms. As the story unfolds, Hulova’s unnamed narrator gains satisfaction from the money her trade brings, bike rides and the importance of good muscle tone but also documents thoughts that wander further and further into delusion. The journey is so intense, I found it difficult to remember where I was in the story and whether Hulova was writing a horror story or a comic opera. The scenes in which the narrator describes how she would plan her one woman ‘Reality TV’ series are particularly compelling and ambiguous: her notion of ‘reality’ being simultaneously absurd, weirdly compelling, funny and ‘unreal’ at the same time. The weirdness and humour continues to the last sentence, and, without wanting to ruin the plot, I can tell you that revelation is even more shocking than the confusion and psychosis leading up to it. I can’t say I enjoyed the book on the first read through, it was just too dark for me. However, I have started reading the book again in small chunks and yet more layers are being revealed. For a man, it is a difficult text to read but one that every man should read. It is that good!

[Chris]

Hůlová's narrator is a thirty-year old Czech prostitute, ruminating on her profession, consumer society at large, the particular tastes of her clientele, and growing old. She is funny, cold, righteous, and amoral, likeable, and disgusting, at turns, which makes reading Three Plastic Rooms an amazing experience.
While some of the book might read as porn, mostly it is word porn. Most of Hůlová's efforts in her native tongue are lost to the reader in English, but many are preserved (or faithfully imitated) by Alex Zucker's translation. Zucker accounts for his efforts in a Translator's Note at the end of the novel. The Introduction by Peter Zusi also speaks to some of the nuances lost in translation, but also to the craft of Hůlová, who is an innovative writer.
I admired both Hůlova and Zucker for both the original consistence of the narrator's voice and the replication of that in translation.
While the writing is admirable, in the end, the narrator's tale is not. She is defeated, A master of her services to every one of her clients, she remains dissatisfied with time and aging, with society, with her own contentment.

[Ta · Rating 1 out of 5]

Jezusie, jakie to jest złe. Moda na wydumane monologi mówiące o wszystkim, co ślina na język przyniesie (a dokładniej palce na klawiaturę) i to z punktu widzenia równie wydumanego alter ego autora, ma się świetnie nie tylko w Polsce. 37-letnia autorka wciela się w praską prostytutkę - już sam pomysł jest słaby, bo nic mnie tak nie irytuje, jak pisanie o czymś, o czym nie ma się pojęcia. A szczerze wątpię, by Hulova miała wśród swoich doświadczeń życiowych świadczenie usług seksualnych za pieniądze (ale naturalnie mogę się mylić, bo nie zadałam sobie trudu zgłębiania jej biografii, poza informacjami, które znalazłam na okładce).
Ta książka jest tak wtórna i niewarta czytania, że nawet nie chce mi się o niej pisać.
To już wolałam "Nocne zwierzęta" Pustkowiak - podobna oniczyna, ale przynajmniej wierzysz autorce. Ja Hulovej nie wierzę.

[Karenina (Nina Ruthström) · Rating 2 out of 5]

Med snirkligt språk, som mycket väl påvisar författarens skicklighet, får vi följa en kvinnas inre monolog om sexköp och allt vad det för med sig. Det är vulgärt och blir vidrigt i kapitlet om våldtäkt av barn. Det här mådde jag bara dåligt av.
+ för samhällskritiken, översättningen och omslaget.

[Mela]

I love Czech literature. Perhaps Petra Hůlová is an author worth knowing. Yet, the language and neologisms were too fatiguing.

[Louise Ní Chuilinn · Rating 3 out of 5]

This is very interesting but hard work, having finished it I think I should have waited until I was more in the mood for it rather than powering through

[Michele · Rating 4 out of 5]

Original, shocking, it will push your buttons. Art in the most true sense.

[Lila · Rating 4 out of 5]

I have never read anything like this book. Disgusting and hilarious. Definitely want to read more by this author.

[Denis Walková · Rating 2 out of 5]

Přemetaforizováno. Skoky z jednoho odstavce do druhého, z tématu do tématu. Zvažovala jsem, zda to není tisková chyba. Od složité metafory (bezúčelné a zbytečné) k vulgarismům a zdrobnělinám. Jazykově nekoresponduje, působí to zmateně, hlavní hrdinka nevěrohodná. Od 50. stránky se to už "číst dá", ale pořád to není ono. Na druhou stranu některé myšlenky jsou zamyšlení hodné, některé pasáže taky. Ty "navíc" bohužel převažují. Seškrtat, vydat polovinu a bude to stát za druhé čtení. Takhle nikoliv.

[Klára · Rating 4 out of 5]

Skvělá slovní zásoba, nesčetně kreativních novotvarů, které se vám ani nemusí vyloženě líbit, jsou ale povšimnutí a cenění hodné.
Cením výběr kontroverzního téma, které určitě zanechává dost otázek a během čtení je člověk v rámci představy, "o čem je a není slušné číst" konfrontován s vlastním vysvětlením, jak to čte a proč to tak čte. To může znamenat nový způsob, jak s knihou být a hledat si k ní cestu, jak nahlížet na někoho ve společnosti tolik očerňovaného a tabuizovaného jako je prostitutka.
Za přečtení jsem moc ráda a utvrzuji se v tom, že současná česká próza má co nabídnout.

[Kristýna Huclová · Rating 3 out of 5]

Tak odhlédnuli od toho, že je to už několikátá knížka v řadě bez děje (žejo, Tokarzcuk, Hřbitovní hlíno atd) a že mi trochu uniká, co tímhle chtěla autorka říci světu a o světu, že postava konzervatvní prostitutky, která si schovává oltářík pod dřezem a vede filozofující monolog je víc než cokoli jiného neuvěřitelná, tak jsem se docela čtením o rašplích a zandaváku bavila. Jazykovou pestrostí a originalitou, citem pro jazyk, ironii a nadsázku.

[Erica Strange · Rating 2 out of 5]

This is a difficult one...
It is masterfully written and carefully translated. However, the meaning of it all was lost on me.
While I appreciate the linguistic experimentation, I can't say I enjoyed it.

[Pavlína Konečná · Rating 5 out of 5]

Pět hvězd za umění tak výstižně zprostředkovat snad jakékoli prostředí. Na mě už to ale byla trochu silná káva, s čímž jsem samozřejmě měla počítat a odmyslím-li můj osobní postoj, kniha byla skvělá.

[Lukasz · Rating 4 out of 5]

Kiedyś podczas jednej z wizyt w mojej ulubionej księgarnio-kawiarni natrafiłem na tą książkę. Ponieważ już wtedy sporo książek czekało na przeczytanie nie zdecydowałem się na zakup tej książki, jedynie dodałem tą pozycję na półkę "chcę przeczytać".
W ostatnim czasie sięgnąłem po kilka ekstrawaganckich książek napisanych, mam tu na myśli Masłowską, Charlotte Roche, idąc dalej tym tropem postanowiłem sięgnąć po "Plastikowe M3" Petry Hulovej.
Petra Hulova jest czeską autorką kilku jak dla mnie intrygujących książek. Jej debiut związany był z podróżą do Mongolii. Autorka zresztą sama spędziła trochę czasu w tamtym kraju i na podstawie własnych doświadczeń postanowiła napisać książkę gdzie porusza temat Mongolii. W przypadku "Plastikowego M3" jednak jak najbardziej pisze o sytuacji w swojej ojczyźnie, w Pradze. Tematem który porusza to jest kwestia prostytucji. Główną narratorką "Plastikowego M3" jest trzydziestoletnia prostytutka, która w postaci monologu opowiada o swoich klientach, o tym co ma miejsce w jej plastikowym, jak ona to nazywa "M3".
Książka jest bardzo odważna językowo oraz obyczajowo. Na każdej stronie znajdziemy wiele słów opisujących organy płciowe, stosunki seksualne, odważne przemyślenia prostytutki na temat jej własnego życia oraz jej klientów.
Petra Hulova jest dobrą obserwatorką rzeczywistości. W swoim debiucie opisała podróż do Mongolii. W przypadku "Plastikowego M3" postanowiła opisać kwestię najstarszego zawodu świata. Petra Hulova pisze w dość oryginalny sposób, jej warsztat pisarski jest dość oryginalny, ciekawy, intrygujący, jedyny w swoim rodzaju. Sięgając po książkę wiedziałem, że będzie to monolog prostytutki, nie wiedziałem czego mam się za bardzo spodziewać po tej książce. Zaskoczyła mnie ta lektura. Nie każdemu się spodoba. Jeśli ktoś lubi książki oryginalne, kontrowersyjne, poruszające kontrowersyjne, ale wszem obecne, uniwersalne tematy to myślę, że z zainteresowaniem przeczyta tą książkę.
W języku czeskim nie ma niestety dostępnego audiobooka, ale za to jest dostępne nagranie sztuki teatralnej pod tytułem "Czeska Pornografia", które zostało oparte na książce "Plastikowe M3". W jednym z wywiadów autorka stwierdziła, że ta sztuka teatralna jest lepsza od jej książki.

[oblakaknihahlavavnich · Rating 2 out of 5]

Pokud mě kniha dokáže překvapit nebo šokovat, rozhodně si zaslouží, aby o ní bylo něco řečeno. Pak jsou ale případy, kdy překvapení a šok v půlce knihy opadnou. A přesně to je případ Umělohmotného třípokoje.
Do knížky jsem se pouštěla naslepo a vůbec jsem nečekala, co mě v ní čeká. Po prvotním zmatení jsem si urovnala určité výrazy a do knihy se dokonce zvládla začíst.
Hlavní hrdinkou je zde bezejmenná prostitutka, která bez příkras a zábran vypráví cokoli, co jí přijde na mysl (tak to minimálně působilo na mě). Styl, jakým byly příběhy podávány, působí zmateně, neuspořádaně, mnohdy i trošku nesmyslně. Při čtení mi to trošku překáželo, na druhou stranu to ale skvěle sedělo s osobnosti hlavní hrdinky.
Bohužel v půlce knihy jsem se začala neskutečně nudit! Připadalo mi, že se děj (?) točí v kruhu a pořád se setkávám s tím stejným. Navíc výrazy, které mě na začátku knihy překvapily, začaly v půlce působit na sílu a jejich vtip tak nějak opadl.
Upozorňuji, že v knize také není nouze o barvité popisy (a to často velmi nepříjemných událostí).
S odstupem času vím, že na knihu brzy zapomenu.

[Bella · Rating 2 out of 5]

I wish I could have read it in Czech, since although well translated (Alex Zucker has done a great job despite the difficulties of translating it, as him itself explains it at the end fo the book), I feel like a lot of the literary value of this book is lost in translation.
Originally, I would have given it 3 stars, but there is a specific chapter where the narrator explicitly describes a sex scene between a minor and a pedophile. Apparently, it was the author's way to make a little experiment of 'understanding what goes on in the pedophile's mind' in order to still get to the conclusion that understanding does not justify it. Although I understand the reasoning, I personally found it disturbing and completely unnecessary.

[Evelin Stojaspalová · Rating 2 out of 5]

Ehm... Jakože... Cože?!? Tuhle knihu jsem prostě asi nepochopila. Anotace říká, ��e se jedná o: "zpověď stárnoucí prostitutky, která s humorem a nadsázkou popisuje příhody při vykonávání nejstaršího řemesla."
*
Jako za mě jedno WTF. Kniha není ani kontroverzní, ani vtipná a za mě vlastně ani zajímavá. Celý text je poskládaný bez ladu a skladu, kniha nemá vlastně ani žádný děj. S knihou jsem chtěla prásknout do knihovny asi po 20 stranách, ale bohužel, dočítám všechny knihy. Byť má kniha asi 150 stran, tak jsem se s ní trápila týden. Co je obdivuhodné, tak fakt, že někdo dokáže napsat v tomto stylu celých 150 stran, to by se dalo považovat za lingvistický experiment 👍 ale jinak prostě ne ❌

[Pete · Rating 3 out of 5]

“What the f*ck am I reading?” This thought came up again and again during my journey through “Three Plastic Rooms” and while I relish in the novelty of such a shocking piece of work I can’t say that I enjoyed this one. It’s gross and sad with a vicious humor that matches well with the subject matter. An exploration of the inner world of a Czech prostitute that reveals the nastiness of male desire and the horror of sexual abuse and pedophilia. The writing is absurd, experimental, and a bit stream of consciousness that makes the book a challenge to follow. As our protagonists warns, “be afraid, be very afraid”. 2.5 stars.

[mihusky · Rating 2 out of 5]

Bez rewelacji, ale wstydu też nie ma. Mam wrażenie, że byłby to lepszy materiał na teatralny monodram niż powieść, gdzie gra aktorska mogłaby w pełni wydobyć komizm opowieści. Trochę rozczarowujące były dla mnie zabiegi słowotwórcze, neologizmy. Z jednej strony pozwoliły uniknąć wulgarności, co było bardzo dobrym pomysłem na ich użycie, z drugiej jednak zinfantylizowały opowieść. Sztucznie dla mnie brzmiały neologizmy na określenie genitaliów, w odmiennym niż tradycyjne rodzaju gramatycznym (wtykacz i raszpla). Byłem tym na początku lektury nieco skonfundowany :)

[Eva Kadlecová · Rating 2 out of 5]

Drsné dílo z drsného prostředí, rozhodně značně odvážné a kontroverzní se zajímavými myšlenkami, bohužel mě však nenadchl jazyk, jímž bylo psané. Dočetla jsem díky tomu jen s přemáháním, u některých slov a zdrobnělin jsem přímo skřípala zubama. Autorka má rozhodně lepší knihy, na tuhle doufám brzy zapomenu.

[Terry Barlow · Rating 4 out of 5]

Challenging Read. Lewd Language which works. You even get used to it. Some parts uncomfortable. Liked the description of older Women. Plenty of Humour. Thought Provoking. Not a Easy read. Enjoyed. If I wanted light reading. Would read Mills & Boon!.

[Eliška · Rating 3 out of 5]

2,5*