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Cop Out!: The End Of My Brilliant Career In The New Zealand Police

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Following the success of The Laughing Policeman, Glenn Wood completes the story of his rather undistinguished career in the New Zealand Police.

Constable Wood was a disaster waiting to happen. He was the sort of cop who was happier helping little old ladies across the street (even when they were quite content where they were) than pursuing the perpetrators of dreadful deeds.
But if he failed to strike fear into the hearts of the criminal underworld, his superiors had a real problem on their hands. Never before had they been forced to deal with such a well-meaning but accident-prone officer and they hoped, fervently, never to see his like again.
From his early encounters with a less-than-impressed public, through the terrifying days of the Springbok Tour riots, to the gradual realisation that perhaps he wasn’t cut out for life on the beat, this is the hilarious story of a young cop who created a severe disturbance in the force.

189 pages, Kindle Edition

First published November 1, 1999

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About the author

Glenn Wood

17 books11 followers
Hi. I'm Glenn Wood but then you already know that because you've come to my page. I'm a freelance writer with five published books - Two about my misadventures in the Police and three children's books - The Brain Sucker, The Bully Chip and Deadhead. I surf. I like dogs, and cats, Hell, let's just include the whole animal kingdom and be done with it (except those monkeys with the red butts, they're just plain weird).

For more of my writing see my substack.

glennw.substack.com

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5 stars
66 (37%)
4 stars
61 (35%)
3 stars
37 (21%)
2 stars
9 (5%)
1 star
1 (<1%)
Displaying 1 - 9 of 9 reviews
Profile Image for Ralph.
Author 44 books75 followers
April 26, 2014
All things considered, if Glenn Wood's memoirs of being a copper in New Zealand are accurate (and he told me they are "disturbingly unexaggerated), then it's probably for the best that he is no longer part of the thin blue line separating chaos from order. Not everyone, despite their best intentions, can endure the stress and terror of seeing the evil that people do to each other, of seeing laid bare the darkness that festers in the heart of humanity. As I read this account, it became apparent to me that he did not lose at least two things from his two-year close association with villainy--his soul and his sense of humor, though his soul probably did fall into jeopardy when he entered the world of advertising later.

I first encountered Glenn's wild sense of humor in his first book, "The Laughing Policeman," the majority of which was concerned with his training as a police cadet prior to his probationary posting. The smiles, chuckles, groans and laughter provided by that book convinced me to purchase the current book, which picks up where the first left off. I was not disappointed. Not at all. Once again, I laughed, sighed, groaned, cringed (especially at his accident-prone nature), and smiled as Glenn took me on a rambunctious and raucous (and at times bawdy) trip through his life. As we wound our way through the end of his career (I know how a knife in the back feels, mate) the tone of the book changed from humor (high and low) to wistful, slightly melancholic as he is ground down by the grindstones of officialdom, but the ending is uplifting and hopeful despite all that happens, for Glenn emerges as a man ever optimistic, always hopeful, and without bitterness. And with his sense of humor intact.

While many of the events in which he took part are now as forgotten as the newspapers in which they appeared, the foibles he witnessed and in which he participated are current as ever. Most non-Commonwealth readers might feel a schism between his culture and their own, but Glenn's humor, perspicacity and lucidity transcend the cultural divide. Folly is apparently the same in every culture, just as laughter remains a universal language. The author in recent years has started writing children's books, but one can hope that sooner or later he will again turn his hand toward humor, perhaps sending a satiric harpoon soaring in the direction of the advertising world.
128 reviews
January 31, 2024
decent conclusion

I rally enjoyed the first book, this one was harder going for the first half. I was ready to throttle the guy for being such an idiot, but her somehow reeled me back on. He has a good sense of humor, but it is definitely hard to believe he was such an idiot. It did give me a better appreciation for the hard job police have, and o don’t normally cut them much slack as I have seen them abuse their power.
Worthwhile read but a bit of a hard slog for the first half of this book.
Profile Image for Caffeinated Weka.
135 reviews4 followers
March 4, 2020
Cop Out! is the follow up to The Laughing Policeman and documents Constable Glenn Wood's very short career in the New Zealand Police. Once again the story is told with self-deprecating humour but the tales are more poignant this time. A constant stream of bad luck (not always innocent, though) and some really trying situations reinforces my belief that the beat is not a place for an inexperienced school leaver trying to find their place in the world.
Profile Image for Aaron.
166 reviews2 followers
January 31, 2022
I just couldn't stop laughing 😄. So many of us numpties can relate to this book.
To think at one stage I wanted to be a cop. This gave me an insight to what could have happened if I took it further than that information night at the Christchurch cop shop.
Please tell me if you have a friend whose joined the Army imagine that book.I don't like early starts so I didn't't take that further either.
Brilliant read.
Profile Image for Jennifer Hudson.
94 reviews20 followers
March 9, 2022
Not as funny or enthralling as the first, but nonetheless an entertaining viewpoint. Glenn Wood narrates his Gonzo-like misadventures as a rookie cop. You can't keep from feeling a sense of frustration and empathy on his behalf. Truly insightful and comedic, a great story.
877 reviews3 followers
July 19, 2025
An engaging book about Glenn's service in the New Zealand police force. Several times I found myself laughing out loud.
Profile Image for Stefani Akins.
211 reviews12 followers
May 17, 2014
Constable Wood, fresh from the training academy, is eager to begin his career in the New Zealand Police. It doesn't take him long, however, to realise that actually working the job is a horse of a different colour.

Glenn Wood maintains his self-deprecating sense of humour as he tells of triumphs and tragedies and why he ended up leaving the police, anyway.

I had a bit of hard time with this review. Yes, "Cop Out" is the sequel to "The Laughing Policeman", but whereas TLP contained a lot of laugh out loud episodes, "Cop Out" does not. Some readers might find it difficult to switch from the very humorous to the much more serious, so be forewarned. Besides that, the book serves well as a small time capsule, describing some of the political turmoil that affected New Zealand in the early 80s.

Really, "Cop Out" gets a solid three-and-a-half stars from me (which I might up to four, after the next re-edit!). So go out and read!
Displaying 1 - 9 of 9 reviews

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