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Tri System's Edge: Humble Beginnings
"Paradise is a pretty deceptive name for such a deadly planet, but how was I supposed to know it was infested with Vie? I didn’t even know what Vie were, not until I was attacked…"
Trying to maintain order in the Tri Systems is no small job for The Directive. Chaos abounds with militias, smugglers, and criminals of the worst kind, all looking out for number one.
Kalla’s no different, but fate has other plans for her. When her ship crash lands on Paradise, the chain of events that follow put her on a path that could mean the end of the Tri Systems...
...or maybe just the beginning?
Trying to maintain order in the Tri Systems is no small job for The Directive. Chaos abounds with militias, smugglers, and criminals of the worst kind, all looking out for number one.
Kalla’s no different, but fate has other plans for her. When her ship crash lands on Paradise, the chain of events that follow put her on a path that could mean the end of the Tri Systems...
...or maybe just the beginning?
- GenresScience Fiction
173 pages, Kindle Edition
First published September 24, 2013
12 people are currently reading
35 people want to read
About the author
Ron Schrader
8 books3 followersRon Schrader is a fiction author, web consultant and the owner of a digital publishing company. Though preceded by two short stories, his first novel Tri System's Edge: Humble Beginnings was published in late 2013 after almost a year in making, and with the help of a professional editing firm. The second book in the series is currently in progress, with the goal to publish sometime late 2014.
When he's not writing or working, Ron enjoys watching movies, baking and spending time with his wife and four children.
When he's not writing or working, Ron enjoys watching movies, baking and spending time with his wife and four children.
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Displaying 1 - 3 of 3 reviews
April 11, 2014
Overall, this was a good story. Interesting idea, got me caught up in the suspense of the moment a couple of times, likable enough characters.
It is just difficult to review a book by someone you know....
I did like those things mentioned above, but the book could have benefited from more proof reading and maybe someone the author trusted to be honest. It is a first novel, so I'll chalk some things up to that. So, some things that need attention:
There were a number of instances where the author would repeat a phrase or description numerous times within the space of a couple of paragraphs, which was completely unnecessary and annoying. You have to trust your readers to be smart enough to get it the first time.
Words were misused, particularly the word "glared" which means to stare at angrily and was used in moments where the word 'gazed' or something related to that would have been far more appropriate. A forest 'infested' with trees doesn't work too well for me either, as that denotes something undesirable in its abundance and I think we really do want to see trees in a forest.
The author took an unusual approach to writing dialogue, using a period instead of a comma before the quote marks. I don't even know if that is actually wrong, but I've never seen it in any other book so it felt very odd.
There were quite a few little proof reading problems where a word (like 'the' or 'a') was missing or where it was duplicated and at least one instance of a missing letter - the 'e' at the end of 'here', making it 'her'. Little things that could have been fixed. I've read books with worse editing problems, but anything that pulls the reader (maybe only THIS reader) out of the story isn't a good thing.
One more thing: is this book aimed at a European audience? The use of the metric system was frustrating. I get that it was more 'scientific' and maybe even futuristic, but it isn't 'user friendly' to the average American reader. The conversion isn't automatic for me, so it put a big PAUSE in my brain every time I read a metric measure and had far less meaning to me as I couldn't be bothered to do the conversion each time. Just another element that pulled me out of the story.
So, an intriguing story that needs to be cleaned up a bit.
It is just difficult to review a book by someone you know....
I did like those things mentioned above, but the book could have benefited from more proof reading and maybe someone the author trusted to be honest. It is a first novel, so I'll chalk some things up to that. So, some things that need attention:
There were a number of instances where the author would repeat a phrase or description numerous times within the space of a couple of paragraphs, which was completely unnecessary and annoying. You have to trust your readers to be smart enough to get it the first time.
Words were misused, particularly the word "glared" which means to stare at angrily and was used in moments where the word 'gazed' or something related to that would have been far more appropriate. A forest 'infested' with trees doesn't work too well for me either, as that denotes something undesirable in its abundance and I think we really do want to see trees in a forest.
The author took an unusual approach to writing dialogue, using a period instead of a comma before the quote marks. I don't even know if that is actually wrong, but I've never seen it in any other book so it felt very odd.
There were quite a few little proof reading problems where a word (like 'the' or 'a') was missing or where it was duplicated and at least one instance of a missing letter - the 'e' at the end of 'here', making it 'her'. Little things that could have been fixed. I've read books with worse editing problems, but anything that pulls the reader (maybe only THIS reader) out of the story isn't a good thing.
One more thing: is this book aimed at a European audience? The use of the metric system was frustrating. I get that it was more 'scientific' and maybe even futuristic, but it isn't 'user friendly' to the average American reader. The conversion isn't automatic for me, so it put a big PAUSE in my brain every time I read a metric measure and had far less meaning to me as I couldn't be bothered to do the conversion each time. Just another element that pulled me out of the story.
So, an intriguing story that needs to be cleaned up a bit.
January 4, 2014
Good book, I'm generally not into sci-fi not once I started I couldn't stop. Then I kept thinking about it during the day and even stopped reading John Grishams new one to see what was going to happen. Good stuff!
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June 29, 20153.5 very readable stars!
Displaying 1 - 3 of 3 reviews