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Surviving Sue: An inspirational survivor's story about a daughter and her life with a mother who was riddled with alcoholism, Alzheimer's, anxiety, depression, and Munchausen's.
“Surviving Sue” is a heart-wrenching story about the torment of keeping secrets, told from the daughter’s perspective. She navigates her mother’s mental health and addiction issues, while trying to shield and protect her disabled sister. “Surviving Sue” is about the power of storytelling to build resiliency, and a guidebook for others who struggle with complex family issues including Alzheimer’s, depression, alcoholism, developmental and physical disabilities.
Dr. Atkinson (Vicki) earned degrees in counseling and psychology and a doctorate in adult education. Vicki is a licensed professional counselor (LPC) and a leadership and life coach in private practice. Vicki lives near Chicago with her husband Paul and her daughter, Delaney, who continues to be the light of her life. Vicki’s beloved sister with disabilities, Lisa, continues to thrive, delighting friends and family with her big heart and sense of humor.
Dr. Atkinson (Vicki) earned degrees in counseling and psychology and a doctorate in adult education. Vicki is a licensed professional counselor (LPC) and a leadership and life coach in private practice. Vicki lives near Chicago with her husband Paul and her daughter, Delaney, who continues to be the light of her life. Vicki’s beloved sister with disabilities, Lisa, continues to thrive, delighting friends and family with her big heart and sense of humor.
301 pages, Kindle Edition
Published July 9, 2023
3 people are currently reading
8 people want to read
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Displaying 1 - 8 of 8 reviews
August 18, 2025
Surviving Sue is not an easy read, but it
is a moving story written with raw honesty.
As someone whose own mother was schizophrenic,
I resonated with a great deal of this book.
It is so very hard to cope with when you are a child and
you have no idea why your mother is so unkind.
Not only did Vicki have that to deal with, but she
also the added worry of trying to keep
her disabled sister Lisa safe ( a burden that no child should
have to carry).
Vicki’s mother Sue, suffered from alcoholism, depression, Alzheimers and
also, Munchausen by Proxy.
Lisa was the main focus of Sue’s obsessive behaviour, while Vicki was the source
of her frequent outbursts of rage and anger.
My heart broke for every person in this family, and towards the end, especially Sue.
Alzheimer's is a harrowing disease, which I have witnessed firsthand,
also.
Vicki’s courage and strength shine throughout this book,
and I could sense empathy for her mother despite what she suffered.
All mental illness has a root cause, I believe, and often requires
a deeper level of understanding
( I know, not easy when you are on the receiving end of it)
I applaud Vicki for writing this book with grace and sprinkles of humour, too.
How she survived Sue, I do not know.
I am glad that Lisa survived, also.
These things are not easy to survive, but somehow we find the strength
to do so, and sharing our story is part of the healing.
Thank you, Vicki.
I recommend this book with 5 stars.
is a moving story written with raw honesty.
As someone whose own mother was schizophrenic,
I resonated with a great deal of this book.
It is so very hard to cope with when you are a child and
you have no idea why your mother is so unkind.
Not only did Vicki have that to deal with, but she
also the added worry of trying to keep
her disabled sister Lisa safe ( a burden that no child should
have to carry).
Vicki’s mother Sue, suffered from alcoholism, depression, Alzheimers and
also, Munchausen by Proxy.
Lisa was the main focus of Sue’s obsessive behaviour, while Vicki was the source
of her frequent outbursts of rage and anger.
My heart broke for every person in this family, and towards the end, especially Sue.
Alzheimer's is a harrowing disease, which I have witnessed firsthand,
also.
Vicki’s courage and strength shine throughout this book,
and I could sense empathy for her mother despite what she suffered.
All mental illness has a root cause, I believe, and often requires
a deeper level of understanding
( I know, not easy when you are on the receiving end of it)
I applaud Vicki for writing this book with grace and sprinkles of humour, too.
How she survived Sue, I do not know.
I am glad that Lisa survived, also.
These things are not easy to survive, but somehow we find the strength
to do so, and sharing our story is part of the healing.
Thank you, Vicki.
I recommend this book with 5 stars.
January 19, 2024
This book stretches from Sue’s childhood to her death, and the bulk is through Vicki’s experiences with her mom. Sue has two sisters (Louisa and Carolyn) and one brother (Keith), and they drop in at various points in the book.
As a young adult, Sue marries Sonny, and they have two daughters (Lisa and Vicki). Lisa is the older sibling, and she is developmentally disabled. While pregnant with Lisa, Sue drank and “dabbled” in drugs, but possibly didn’t know she was pregnant at the time. However, Sue used the excused that the doctor was inebriated during the delivery, and he didn’t get Lisa into an oxygen-rich incubator fast enough.
Which became a pattern through Sue’s life: cover up the secret, but also try to cover her feelings of guilt through alcohol (Miller Lite being a favored beverage).
Vicki shows her mother as a three-dimensional person, not simply a list of her diagnoses. Sue was friendly and charming, and she was the life of parties. She worked hard to advocate for better opportunities for Lisa, as well as raised money for programs to help people who were developmentally disabled.
However, Sue was also argumentative and quick to anger. This book was a difficult read at times for how Sue treated others: her husband, her daughters, neighbors, and more. She denied being an alcoholic and hid her cans of Miller Lite. And she denied creating the chaos she often caused.
Bright spots are included throughout the book. The father, Sonny, is supportive of his daughters. Lisa is a sweetheart. Vicki’s husband (Paul) and their daughter (Delany). Beyond family, people are helpful to Vicki, including teachers and the kind Ms. Johnson, who was on the staff of one of the many schools that Vicki attended, due to the family’s frequent moves. More allies arrive in the later part of the book, and they arrive with relief and gratitude.
Vicki manages to have a sense of humor during the tellings of some experiences. A kind of “Can you believe that happened??” And while comparing Sue with Lucille Ball of “I Love Lucy” — during those escapades.
I came out admiring Vicki for keeping that humor, for persisting in helping her mom and sister, for doing the hard work to try to understand her mom, and for crafting this book.
As a young adult, Sue marries Sonny, and they have two daughters (Lisa and Vicki). Lisa is the older sibling, and she is developmentally disabled. While pregnant with Lisa, Sue drank and “dabbled” in drugs, but possibly didn’t know she was pregnant at the time. However, Sue used the excused that the doctor was inebriated during the delivery, and he didn’t get Lisa into an oxygen-rich incubator fast enough.
Which became a pattern through Sue’s life: cover up the secret, but also try to cover her feelings of guilt through alcohol (Miller Lite being a favored beverage).
Vicki shows her mother as a three-dimensional person, not simply a list of her diagnoses. Sue was friendly and charming, and she was the life of parties. She worked hard to advocate for better opportunities for Lisa, as well as raised money for programs to help people who were developmentally disabled.
However, Sue was also argumentative and quick to anger. This book was a difficult read at times for how Sue treated others: her husband, her daughters, neighbors, and more. She denied being an alcoholic and hid her cans of Miller Lite. And she denied creating the chaos she often caused.
Bright spots are included throughout the book. The father, Sonny, is supportive of his daughters. Lisa is a sweetheart. Vicki’s husband (Paul) and their daughter (Delany). Beyond family, people are helpful to Vicki, including teachers and the kind Ms. Johnson, who was on the staff of one of the many schools that Vicki attended, due to the family’s frequent moves. More allies arrive in the later part of the book, and they arrive with relief and gratitude.
Vicki manages to have a sense of humor during the tellings of some experiences. A kind of “Can you believe that happened??” And while comparing Sue with Lucille Ball of “I Love Lucy” — during those escapades.
I came out admiring Vicki for keeping that humor, for persisting in helping her mom and sister, for doing the hard work to try to understand her mom, and for crafting this book.
July 21, 2025
Surviving Sue is a tender, heart-breaking and meticulously detailed memoir about surviving the trauma of growing up with an abusive and mentally unstable mother.
We come to know not only the author's mother, but her affectionate father who is often away on business, her beloved disabled sister who also suffers at her mother's hands, her aunts and uncle who appear and disappear throughout the narrative, and the many teachers and caretakers who come to the author's aide and give her the love and validation she needs to cope with her mother's neglect and abuse.
What is remarkable is how the author gives the reader the full context of her mother's life, from birth to death. We learn how the mother became this way, how her chaotic relationships with other members of her family evolved, how she became a strong advocate for disabled children and a leader in the field, even while using her daughter's disability to promote her own needs and self-esteem.
In addition, we see how the author strives to protect her sister while learning how to cope with her mother's illness. Most of all, we learn how the author grows strong and wise and compassionate despite all she suffers. She is evidence of the old truism: what doesn't kill you makes you stronger
Writing about trauma is healing not only for the writer but for the reader as well. For those readers who have suffered or are suffering from similar trauma, it helps them to know they are not alone and gives them coping mechanisms to emulate. For those who have not suffered this way, it gives them a peek into another's life and helps build empathy and awareness. I learned a lot from reading the excellent memoir and highly recommend it. I am so grateful to the author for giving me a copy of her book.
We come to know not only the author's mother, but her affectionate father who is often away on business, her beloved disabled sister who also suffers at her mother's hands, her aunts and uncle who appear and disappear throughout the narrative, and the many teachers and caretakers who come to the author's aide and give her the love and validation she needs to cope with her mother's neglect and abuse.
What is remarkable is how the author gives the reader the full context of her mother's life, from birth to death. We learn how the mother became this way, how her chaotic relationships with other members of her family evolved, how she became a strong advocate for disabled children and a leader in the field, even while using her daughter's disability to promote her own needs and self-esteem.
In addition, we see how the author strives to protect her sister while learning how to cope with her mother's illness. Most of all, we learn how the author grows strong and wise and compassionate despite all she suffers. She is evidence of the old truism: what doesn't kill you makes you stronger
Writing about trauma is healing not only for the writer but for the reader as well. For those readers who have suffered or are suffering from similar trauma, it helps them to know they are not alone and gives them coping mechanisms to emulate. For those who have not suffered this way, it gives them a peek into another's life and helps build empathy and awareness. I learned a lot from reading the excellent memoir and highly recommend it. I am so grateful to the author for giving me a copy of her book.
August 21, 2023
Surviving Sue is a moving personal story by Dr. Vicki Atkinson detailing the challenges of growing up in a dysfunctional family with an alcoholic, controlling mother and navigating those sudden mood changes. I appreciated that the author wrote an honest tale and held back none of the horrors she and her family experienced. At the same time, this is not a book unleashing all the author's grievances toward her mother. It fairly characterizes Sue's strengths and gives her mom credit for her mom's positive qualities. Sue could be the life of the party, but she could also turn on a dime with hurtful anger. She also was an advocate for the developmentally disabled. While most of this came in the form of verbal abuse, Sue's problems escalated over time.
Sue had a narcissistic personality and tried to portray herself as a caring and loving mother, especially with her developmentally disabled daughter, Lisa. While Sue stood up for Lisa and other children like her, she developed an unhealthy controlling behavior, dispensing unnecessary medicines for non-existing ailments. Sue's wrath came out in many ways and was often directed at Vicki, who became a frequent target of Sue.
After Atkinson marries and has a daughter, she faces the formidable challenge of supporting Sue's problems escalate. Sue's struggles made me reflect on personal challenges with my mother as her Alzheimer's progressed. This moving memoir shows the effects on not only the person experiencing Alzheimer's but their family in finding suitable housing and trained professionals to provide guidance and support.
Sue had a narcissistic personality and tried to portray herself as a caring and loving mother, especially with her developmentally disabled daughter, Lisa. While Sue stood up for Lisa and other children like her, she developed an unhealthy controlling behavior, dispensing unnecessary medicines for non-existing ailments. Sue's wrath came out in many ways and was often directed at Vicki, who became a frequent target of Sue.
After Atkinson marries and has a daughter, she faces the formidable challenge of supporting Sue's problems escalate. Sue's struggles made me reflect on personal challenges with my mother as her Alzheimer's progressed. This moving memoir shows the effects on not only the person experiencing Alzheimer's but their family in finding suitable housing and trained professionals to provide guidance and support.
July 3, 2024
This is a riveting memoir by Vicki Atkinson chronicling life with her mother Sue, who suffered from alcoholism, depression, Munchausen by Proxy, dementia, and Alzheimer’s. It covers the author's life from childhood through adulthood and it’s a heartbreaking, courageous, and frequently compassionate account of Sue’s life as told through her daughter’s eyes.
It describes a fractious relationship that many people would have abandoned as soon as they were able, except that Vicki’s disabled sister Lisa is in the mix and the focus of Sue’s obsession. I sensed that Lisa was the glue that kept the author engaged despite how she was verbally and emotionally abused. The author’s strength and perseverance are remarkable, and I was completely caught up in the story.
It's also an honest account, sharing Sue’s strengths and positive points, and I could see how many of her destructive and manipulative choices were attempts to compensate for deep-seated insecurities and maintain control of her own life. It doesn’t forgive her behavior, in my opinion, but it helps understand it.
Out of necessity, Vicki’s role changes from vilified daughter to emergency manager and advocate as Sue’s mental health deteriorates. The importance of a strong team of medical, legal, and residential supports became clear, and I could relate to many of the challenges, as a result of dealing with my own aging parents.
Though not a short read, I finished this book in one day and highly recommend it to readers who enjoy memoirs about growing up in difficult situations and persevering with courage, fortitude, and compassion.
It describes a fractious relationship that many people would have abandoned as soon as they were able, except that Vicki’s disabled sister Lisa is in the mix and the focus of Sue’s obsession. I sensed that Lisa was the glue that kept the author engaged despite how she was verbally and emotionally abused. The author’s strength and perseverance are remarkable, and I was completely caught up in the story.
It's also an honest account, sharing Sue’s strengths and positive points, and I could see how many of her destructive and manipulative choices were attempts to compensate for deep-seated insecurities and maintain control of her own life. It doesn’t forgive her behavior, in my opinion, but it helps understand it.
Out of necessity, Vicki’s role changes from vilified daughter to emergency manager and advocate as Sue’s mental health deteriorates. The importance of a strong team of medical, legal, and residential supports became clear, and I could relate to many of the challenges, as a result of dealing with my own aging parents.
Though not a short read, I finished this book in one day and highly recommend it to readers who enjoy memoirs about growing up in difficult situations and persevering with courage, fortitude, and compassion.
January 21, 2025
Vicki Atkinson’s book is an honest and emotional memoir about living with her mom, Sue, who was plagued with mental health and addiction issues. Sue’s moods would shift from joyful to rage in no time, causing confusion and pain to anyone nearby. Vicki disclosed only the truth, no sugarcoating any situation, and even inserted humor at times. In the midst of chaos and after she moved out from her mother’s house, she remained concerned about her disabled sister, Lisa, who landed on the receiving end of their mother’s manipulation and abuse.
How Vicki met each challenging moment with resilience, compassion, and strength was absolutely amazing to discover. She uncovered the means for coping while also providing us a glimpse of the good side of Sue…her fun, entertaining qualities, and empathetic heart that advocated for others. I found this perspective to be heartwarming and inspirational. Vicki became a licensed counselor, so I’m sure living with her mom’s unstable personality offered insight for her future to counsel others. This book truly demonstrates what it means to love and forgive, and to stay strong in turbulent times. Highly recommended!
How Vicki met each challenging moment with resilience, compassion, and strength was absolutely amazing to discover. She uncovered the means for coping while also providing us a glimpse of the good side of Sue…her fun, entertaining qualities, and empathetic heart that advocated for others. I found this perspective to be heartwarming and inspirational. Vicki became a licensed counselor, so I’m sure living with her mom’s unstable personality offered insight for her future to counsel others. This book truly demonstrates what it means to love and forgive, and to stay strong in turbulent times. Highly recommended!
July 11, 2024
You may think the subject is heavy, but what comes through in the story is the grace and resilience with which Vicki survived Sue. Vicki’s story is an inspiration to survivor’s of trauma and rejection. Written with deep thoughtfulness and injected with humour, the story carries us through the many anecdotes of Sue’s life, some mortifying, some funny, some blameless, all dysfunctional
There is so much to the story that spans the decades of Sue’s life and thus Vicki’s, and I don’t want to provide any spoilers. The insights you gain will be yours and there will be many. The inspiration of experiencing another warrior’s story is cathartic. And the gentle removal of tissue paper like layers is a gift that allows us to see more clearly beneath the fragilities and frailties of human complexities.
A truly fascinating read by an author that teaches us what survival, courage, and resilience really look like. Surviving Sue is perfectly named, and should be a movie that must be experienced far and wide. Undoubtedly each of us will find something within the story that we easily relate to. Surviving Sue may be Vicki’s story of survival, and more than that, it is an inspiring survival guide.
There is so much to the story that spans the decades of Sue’s life and thus Vicki’s, and I don’t want to provide any spoilers. The insights you gain will be yours and there will be many. The inspiration of experiencing another warrior’s story is cathartic. And the gentle removal of tissue paper like layers is a gift that allows us to see more clearly beneath the fragilities and frailties of human complexities.
A truly fascinating read by an author that teaches us what survival, courage, and resilience really look like. Surviving Sue is perfectly named, and should be a movie that must be experienced far and wide. Undoubtedly each of us will find something within the story that we easily relate to. Surviving Sue may be Vicki’s story of survival, and more than that, it is an inspiring survival guide.
February 25, 2025
Surviving Sue is a deeply moving memoir that should be required reading for new parents and anyone seeking insight into the complexities of family dynamics, resilience, and caregiving. Dr. Vicki Atkinson shares her journey with raw honesty, recounting a childhood shaped by her mother’s struggles with alcoholism, Alzheimer’s, anxiety, depression, and Munchausen’s. Her storytelling is both educational and profoundly personal, offering lessons on overcoming intergenerational trauma, supporting loved ones, and breaking destructive cycles.
Divided into five parts, the book explores Vicki’s formative years, marriage, motherhood, and caregiving experiences, particularly in her mother’s final days. While some stories are heartbreaking, they provide opportunities for reflection and growth—encouraging readers to consider how they nurture children, confront personal struggles, and support family members in crisis.
Reading Surviving Sue was an emotional and enlightening experience. Dr. Atkinson’s memoir exemplifies what The Economist defines as a great memoir: “intimate, genuine, and revelatory.” Her resilience and love shine through every page, making this an unforgettable and highly recommended read.
You can read my in-depth review at http://edwardortizblog.com/2025/02/10...
Divided into five parts, the book explores Vicki’s formative years, marriage, motherhood, and caregiving experiences, particularly in her mother’s final days. While some stories are heartbreaking, they provide opportunities for reflection and growth—encouraging readers to consider how they nurture children, confront personal struggles, and support family members in crisis.
Reading Surviving Sue was an emotional and enlightening experience. Dr. Atkinson’s memoir exemplifies what The Economist defines as a great memoir: “intimate, genuine, and revelatory.” Her resilience and love shine through every page, making this an unforgettable and highly recommended read.
You can read my in-depth review at http://edwardortizblog.com/2025/02/10...
Displaying 1 - 8 of 8 reviews