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Internet Apocalypse #1
Notes from the Internet Apocalypse: A Novel
When the Internet suddenly stops working, society reels from the loss of flowing data, instant messages, and streaming entertainment. Addicts wander the streets, talking to themselves in 140 characters or less and forcing cats to perform tricks for their amusement, while the truly desperate pin their requests for casual encounters on public bulletin boards. The economy tumbles further and the government passes the draconian NET Recovery Act.
For Gladstone, the Net s disappearance comes particularly hard following the loss of his wife, leaving his flask of Jameson s and grandfather s fedora as the only comforts in his Brooklyn apartment. But there are rumors that someone in New York is still online. Someone set apart from this new world where Facebook flirters poke each other in real life and members of Anonymous trade memes at secret parties, where a former librarian can sell information as a human search engine and the perverted fulfill their secret fetishes at the blossoming Rule 34 club. With the help of his friends, a blogger and a webcam girl both now out of work, Gladstone sets off to find the Internet. But is he the right man to save humanity from this Apocalypse?
For fans of David Wong, Chad Kultgen, and Chuck Palahniuk, Wayne Gladstone s "Notes from the Internet Apocalypse "examines the question, What is life without the Web?
For Gladstone, the Net s disappearance comes particularly hard following the loss of his wife, leaving his flask of Jameson s and grandfather s fedora as the only comforts in his Brooklyn apartment. But there are rumors that someone in New York is still online. Someone set apart from this new world where Facebook flirters poke each other in real life and members of Anonymous trade memes at secret parties, where a former librarian can sell information as a human search engine and the perverted fulfill their secret fetishes at the blossoming Rule 34 club. With the help of his friends, a blogger and a webcam girl both now out of work, Gladstone sets off to find the Internet. But is he the right man to save humanity from this Apocalypse?
For fans of David Wong, Chad Kultgen, and Chuck Palahniuk, Wayne Gladstone s "Notes from the Internet Apocalypse "examines the question, What is life without the Web?
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First published March 1, 2014
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August 21, 2014
Rating: 3* of five
The Publisher Says:When the Internet suddenly stops working, society reels from the loss of flowing data, instant messages, and streaming entertainment. Addicts wander the streets, talking to themselves in 140 characters or forcing cats to perform tricks for their amusement, while the truly desperate pin their requests for casual encounters on public bulletin boards. The economy tumbles further and the government passes the draconian NET Recovery Act.
For Gladstone, the Net's disappearance comes particularly hard following the loss of his wife, leaving his flask of Jamesons and grandfather’s fedora as the only comforts in his Brooklyn apartment. But there are rumors that someone in New York is still online. Someone set apart from this new world where Facebook flirters "poke" each other in real life and members of Anonymous trade memes at secret parties. Where a former librarian can sell information as a human search engine, and the perverted fulfill their secret fetishes at the blossoming Rule 34 club. With the help of his friends, a blogger and a webcam girl both now out of work, Gladstone sets off to find the Internet. But is he the right man to save humanity from this Apocalypse?
For fans of David Wong, Chad Kultgen, and Chuck Palahniuk, Wayne Gladstone’s Notes from the Internet Apocalypse examines the question “What is life without the Web?”
My Review: When I was a teen, something Amazing happened to me and my generation. My drama-fag friends and I, at various peoples' houses, spent every Saturday night watching The Funniest Show Ever Made: Saturday Night Live!! Brand new, unprecedented, unlike anything else ever!!!!!!!! (Remember we were adolescents. Caps and exclams and complete lack of perspective were then, as they are now, de rigueur.)
One Saturday night, I couldn't go to whoever's house to watch that week's episode for some reason. I made my mother, at the time 55, watch it with me by promising it would be Hilarious, Momentous, Life-Changing!!!! She, faithless to the dour brand of nutsoid Protestant Puritanism she'd taken to supporting, agreed and watched the whole thing.
I howled! I clapped! I bopped along with the musical guest and Supergenius G.E. Smith! And, as the credits ran, I turned to Mama and demanded, "wasn't that the funniest thing ever?!" She smiled at me and delivered the most withering possible response: "It was indeed! Imogene Coca and Sid Caesar were hilarious in the first sketch, and Jack Benny and Rochester were perfect in that second one."
That is precisely how I feel now: This book was right funny indeed, back when Peter de Vries did the social satire in 1965, and Thorne Smith did the smutty bits in 1935. And damn me if I didn't see Trudeau's Zonker Harris from 1975 somewhere in there.
There is nothing new under the sun, chick-a-biddies, and when enough sunrises have awakened one, there's a distinct lack of surprise in shock humor and topical tropism. Those over 40 are strongly discouraged from reading this book; those over 30 reminded to expect smiles not guffaws.
This work is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-ShareAlike 3.0 Unported License.
The Publisher Says:When the Internet suddenly stops working, society reels from the loss of flowing data, instant messages, and streaming entertainment. Addicts wander the streets, talking to themselves in 140 characters or forcing cats to perform tricks for their amusement, while the truly desperate pin their requests for casual encounters on public bulletin boards. The economy tumbles further and the government passes the draconian NET Recovery Act.
For Gladstone, the Net's disappearance comes particularly hard following the loss of his wife, leaving his flask of Jamesons and grandfather’s fedora as the only comforts in his Brooklyn apartment. But there are rumors that someone in New York is still online. Someone set apart from this new world where Facebook flirters "poke" each other in real life and members of Anonymous trade memes at secret parties. Where a former librarian can sell information as a human search engine, and the perverted fulfill their secret fetishes at the blossoming Rule 34 club. With the help of his friends, a blogger and a webcam girl both now out of work, Gladstone sets off to find the Internet. But is he the right man to save humanity from this Apocalypse?
For fans of David Wong, Chad Kultgen, and Chuck Palahniuk, Wayne Gladstone’s Notes from the Internet Apocalypse examines the question “What is life without the Web?”
My Review: When I was a teen, something Amazing happened to me and my generation. My drama-fag friends and I, at various peoples' houses, spent every Saturday night watching The Funniest Show Ever Made: Saturday Night Live!! Brand new, unprecedented, unlike anything else ever!!!!!!!! (Remember we were adolescents. Caps and exclams and complete lack of perspective were then, as they are now, de rigueur.)
One Saturday night, I couldn't go to whoever's house to watch that week's episode for some reason. I made my mother, at the time 55, watch it with me by promising it would be Hilarious, Momentous, Life-Changing!!!! She, faithless to the dour brand of nutsoid Protestant Puritanism she'd taken to supporting, agreed and watched the whole thing.
I howled! I clapped! I bopped along with the musical guest and Supergenius G.E. Smith! And, as the credits ran, I turned to Mama and demanded, "wasn't that the funniest thing ever?!" She smiled at me and delivered the most withering possible response: "It was indeed! Imogene Coca and Sid Caesar were hilarious in the first sketch, and Jack Benny and Rochester were perfect in that second one."
That is precisely how I feel now: This book was right funny indeed, back when Peter de Vries did the social satire in 1965, and Thorne Smith did the smutty bits in 1935. And damn me if I didn't see Trudeau's Zonker Harris from 1975 somewhere in there.
There is nothing new under the sun, chick-a-biddies, and when enough sunrises have awakened one, there's a distinct lack of surprise in shock humor and topical tropism. Those over 40 are strongly discouraged from reading this book; those over 30 reminded to expect smiles not guffaws.
This work is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-ShareAlike 3.0 Unported License.
March 16, 2014
First Reads Review - Notes from the Internet Apocalypse by Wayne Gladstone
So I won this book through the Goodreads First Reads program, and I wasn't really sure what to expect. I feel I must qualify this review by saying that I like Cracked.com and read it fairly often. I have to say, though, between reading this and John Dies at the End, that perhaps comedy list writing and novel writing are not things that really feed well into each other. Because from the start this book was something of a mess for me, not just because the author is the narrator, not just because the internet disappearing is not handled in a coherent manner, and not just because all the characters are written with a glaze of privilege, but because it just doesn't really make any sense. Not even with the ending, which is a complicated mess in its own right, does the rest of the story come close to coming together.
I suppose the book does a few things, and for many twenty to forty white men who spend a lot of time on the internet, this book might be a fun read. Unfortunately, I couldn't really get past the fact that the book just failed me on pretty much every level. I can see, perhaps, that it is meant to be somewhat offensive, and by being offensive, to be funny. It does make fun of a great many people. The main problem, to me, was that it treats all of its..."jokes" as leveling the playing field. So yes, it makes fun of lonely men on the internet and people who use social media while making fun of women and minorities and things like that. But the fact that the book treats the abuse it heaps on groups that are already oppressed and treats it likes its the same as the abuse it heaps onto straight white men is just offensive. As Cracked itself has listed in an article on what is and isn't funny in comedy, it's not okay to make fun of people less privileged than yourself. So when you have a straight white male writing all the female characters in his book as either Christian idiots or whores, it comes off as much more...bad than funny.
In some ways I would say that this is a great examination of how a large population of people view the world though. The main character's insecurities and prejudices are on full display. In some ways this is sort of the view of the internet through the eyes of a college-aged guy (or older) looking for something to take some time. But it only shows the stereotypes, the cliches, the jokes, without quite understanding that those jokes are considered funny because they reinforce the system that keeps people down. There are only a handful of characters who recur in the story. Only two of them are females. The first is called a whore constantly and is pretty much just an object of sexual desire. She serves no other purpose. The second is the main character's ex-wife who is there to have babies and then, when that fails, to leave. She's his maiden, his true love, and all that, but her role is still only as a mother, or rather as a failed mother who ruined everything. So two women, both existing in roles are sexual and maternal. The male characters, on the other hand, are written with much wider range, with more agency. Only men are really allowed to do anything.
And really, for a book that seems to be about how we use the internet, this is an extremely pessimistic and self-important book. It basically proclaims that nothing important can be done on the internet, that the real connections we make in the real world are much more important. But it draws the lines of real and not-real arbitrarily. The argument of the book seems to be that writing something on a piece of paper is more real than sending an email. Which is not necessarily the case. At least I think that the importance does not necessarily come from the medium through which one is communicating but what is actually being communicated. To think that the internet is making us more alone is to only see part of the picture, that it isn't the internet that is doing it. The internet is just a tool, and while it might certain things easier, it does a tremendous amount of good. And could do more if so much of the internet wasn't twisted around the desire to turn a profit. Because to say that communicating over the internet is less real than talking on the phone or even in person is just wrong. Talking in person doesn't make an interaction real. And I just don't feel that this book made any sort of nuanced point about the internet. It seemed to be basically a call to stop masturbating and go out and get a girl to have sex with. And that is a terrible, terrible message.
In the end, I just couldn't hold to anything that I would call redeeming about this book. I call it pessimistic because it basically looks at the internet and says that it's just keeping people alone, not bringing them together. And, again, that pessimistic. The internet has such a power for good, and while there might be a great deal of crap out there, I really do not like things that can't imagine something being better, that would rather regress than progress. And there is nothing progressive about this book, just a lot of reactionary vitriol. It's cruel, and for fans of that kind of humor, okay I guess, but as a novel I cannot recommend it, and have to give it a single star out of five.
So I won this book through the Goodreads First Reads program, and I wasn't really sure what to expect. I feel I must qualify this review by saying that I like Cracked.com and read it fairly often. I have to say, though, between reading this and John Dies at the End, that perhaps comedy list writing and novel writing are not things that really feed well into each other. Because from the start this book was something of a mess for me, not just because the author is the narrator, not just because the internet disappearing is not handled in a coherent manner, and not just because all the characters are written with a glaze of privilege, but because it just doesn't really make any sense. Not even with the ending, which is a complicated mess in its own right, does the rest of the story come close to coming together.
I suppose the book does a few things, and for many twenty to forty white men who spend a lot of time on the internet, this book might be a fun read. Unfortunately, I couldn't really get past the fact that the book just failed me on pretty much every level. I can see, perhaps, that it is meant to be somewhat offensive, and by being offensive, to be funny. It does make fun of a great many people. The main problem, to me, was that it treats all of its..."jokes" as leveling the playing field. So yes, it makes fun of lonely men on the internet and people who use social media while making fun of women and minorities and things like that. But the fact that the book treats the abuse it heaps on groups that are already oppressed and treats it likes its the same as the abuse it heaps onto straight white men is just offensive. As Cracked itself has listed in an article on what is and isn't funny in comedy, it's not okay to make fun of people less privileged than yourself. So when you have a straight white male writing all the female characters in his book as either Christian idiots or whores, it comes off as much more...bad than funny.
In some ways I would say that this is a great examination of how a large population of people view the world though. The main character's insecurities and prejudices are on full display. In some ways this is sort of the view of the internet through the eyes of a college-aged guy (or older) looking for something to take some time. But it only shows the stereotypes, the cliches, the jokes, without quite understanding that those jokes are considered funny because they reinforce the system that keeps people down. There are only a handful of characters who recur in the story. Only two of them are females. The first is called a whore constantly and is pretty much just an object of sexual desire. She serves no other purpose. The second is the main character's ex-wife who is there to have babies and then, when that fails, to leave. She's his maiden, his true love, and all that, but her role is still only as a mother, or rather as a failed mother who ruined everything. So two women, both existing in roles are sexual and maternal. The male characters, on the other hand, are written with much wider range, with more agency. Only men are really allowed to do anything.
And really, for a book that seems to be about how we use the internet, this is an extremely pessimistic and self-important book. It basically proclaims that nothing important can be done on the internet, that the real connections we make in the real world are much more important. But it draws the lines of real and not-real arbitrarily. The argument of the book seems to be that writing something on a piece of paper is more real than sending an email. Which is not necessarily the case. At least I think that the importance does not necessarily come from the medium through which one is communicating but what is actually being communicated. To think that the internet is making us more alone is to only see part of the picture, that it isn't the internet that is doing it. The internet is just a tool, and while it might certain things easier, it does a tremendous amount of good. And could do more if so much of the internet wasn't twisted around the desire to turn a profit. Because to say that communicating over the internet is less real than talking on the phone or even in person is just wrong. Talking in person doesn't make an interaction real. And I just don't feel that this book made any sort of nuanced point about the internet. It seemed to be basically a call to stop masturbating and go out and get a girl to have sex with. And that is a terrible, terrible message.
In the end, I just couldn't hold to anything that I would call redeeming about this book. I call it pessimistic because it basically looks at the internet and says that it's just keeping people alone, not bringing them together. And, again, that pessimistic. The internet has such a power for good, and while there might be a great deal of crap out there, I really do not like things that can't imagine something being better, that would rather regress than progress. And there is nothing progressive about this book, just a lot of reactionary vitriol. It's cruel, and for fans of that kind of humor, okay I guess, but as a novel I cannot recommend it, and have to give it a single star out of five.
December 17, 2013
"Don't you realize the Internet is just a way for millions of sad people to be completely alone together?"
What if the internet just went away one day?
If it just stopped working. If there was no more email. No more text-messaging. No more Twitter. Facebook. Porn. Goodreads. Reddit. 4chan. What if it all just stopped, but everything else was exactly the same?
Would it be 1993 again (I pick this year because my own internet 'addiction' would begin in 1994, which I can remember being made fun of by friends because I couldn't let a whole 'day' go by without checking my email)?
Or would the fabric of our society be crumbling?
Could we find one another without our phones? Find where we are going without maps on devices? How did we ever meet or get anywhere a mere decade ago?
The zombies I saw last week were part of a YouTube circle. Without a replay button or a link to similar entertainment, they demanded hours and hours of mindless joy from whatever is unfortunate enough to be trapped inside their view. So many innocent cats have been worked to death, forced to do tricks for zombie-amusement without food, water, or a chance of escape.
As a novel I'm not sure if this completly works. It's funny, and at times quite funny, but it gets old after awhile. It would make for a great short story, but there is a point where the story starts to lag for a bit. The book does come to a fairly satisfying conclusion, but some of the middle parts are kind of like watching the middle parts of one of those movies based on a SNL skit.
Harder to ignore, however, are the Twatters. Clever, huh? That's what we're calling Twitter addicts now. Losing the Internet has forced them to interact verbally instead of microblogging their lives, but a lot of them still talk in Tweets:
"Ugh! I'm standing in line at the post office."
"I'm not eating the crusts on my sandwich because apparently I'm five."
"Oh, my god, the barista didn't leave room for milk. First-world problems, right?
But this is the quest of one man to find out where the internet went. And to figure out how to navigate a world without our most trusted of companions, but with the help of a guy who wrote snarky pop-culture pieces for a website and a fetish web-cam model.
He was swarmed by /b/tards like Japanese businessmen to tentacle porn.
December 16, 2014
Notes from the Internet Apocalypse has drawn my interest purely because of its premise - a dystopia featuring a world without a plague or catastrophe, but where one day the internet simply disappears. How would the world react? What would you do if you couldn't browse Goodreads, read the news, connect with people online?
What I didn't know was that Wayne Gladstone is a columnist who writes for a popular website, Cracked.com, and that his book is a satire which initially appeared as a serialized novella on said portal. Notes from the Internet Apocalypse follows a fictionalized Wayne Gladstone through his daily life in the post-internet world. The novel is full of references to internet culture and popular memes (such as internet trolls being forced to troll each other in real life, or people communicating via 400 character tweets face to face). Amids all the commotion and chaos, Gladstone meets a group of friends - including a former camgirl, now out of a job - and is stalked by a self-proclaimed psychic, who states that he is the "intrnet messiah" who can bring the web back. Will he?
I don't fault Mr. Gladstone for writing an absurdist satire - how else could you write a dystopia where the world remains intact, but the internet mysteriously disappeared? - but it seems to me that he also wanted to inject a deeper meaning to his book, and observe how technology can shape loneliness and affect us in not entirely positive ways. But the problem is that he can't combine both - his characters are uninteresting and bland, and the satire reads exactly like something from a Cracked column. The abundance of low humor quickly turns tiring, as it becomes clear that the book doesn't really have anything new to say - about internet jokes, culture, or humanity itself. It looked as if Gladstone (real and fictional) ended up believing that the internet doesn't serve a useful purpose; the web is populated by overgrown, perverted children, who are addicted to it as it provided them with a constant intake of digital junk. The notion of the internet as an important source of knowledge available on a scale previously unknown in this world is completely absent,and the fact that it allows for free and unlimited exchange of ideas, opinions and feelings is simply not included. This is why Notes from the Internet Apocalypse is ultimately a disappointment - I can see it having a readership in a free, weekly web column, but I don't think it's worth paying full price for a retail copy.
What I didn't know was that Wayne Gladstone is a columnist who writes for a popular website, Cracked.com, and that his book is a satire which initially appeared as a serialized novella on said portal. Notes from the Internet Apocalypse follows a fictionalized Wayne Gladstone through his daily life in the post-internet world. The novel is full of references to internet culture and popular memes (such as internet trolls being forced to troll each other in real life, or people communicating via 400 character tweets face to face). Amids all the commotion and chaos, Gladstone meets a group of friends - including a former camgirl, now out of a job - and is stalked by a self-proclaimed psychic, who states that he is the "intrnet messiah" who can bring the web back. Will he?
I don't fault Mr. Gladstone for writing an absurdist satire - how else could you write a dystopia where the world remains intact, but the internet mysteriously disappeared? - but it seems to me that he also wanted to inject a deeper meaning to his book, and observe how technology can shape loneliness and affect us in not entirely positive ways. But the problem is that he can't combine both - his characters are uninteresting and bland, and the satire reads exactly like something from a Cracked column. The abundance of low humor quickly turns tiring, as it becomes clear that the book doesn't really have anything new to say - about internet jokes, culture, or humanity itself. It looked as if Gladstone (real and fictional) ended up believing that the internet doesn't serve a useful purpose; the web is populated by overgrown, perverted children, who are addicted to it as it provided them with a constant intake of digital junk. The notion of the internet as an important source of knowledge available on a scale previously unknown in this world is completely absent,and the fact that it allows for free and unlimited exchange of ideas, opinions and feelings is simply not included. This is why Notes from the Internet Apocalypse is ultimately a disappointment - I can see it having a readership in a free, weekly web column, but I don't think it's worth paying full price for a retail copy.
November 12, 2013
I'm always surprised when I can't put a book down. But I'm even more surprised when I look at the clock, notice hours have passed, and suddenly realize that I haven't put a book down. That loss-of-time feeling can happen when you start clicking links on the internet, leaving you ultimately feeling empty. The loss-of-time you experience reading Notes From The Internet Apocalypse leaves you feeling filled- full of ideas, questions, laughter, pathos. This book is absorptive. You'll finish it quickly because you won't be able to stop. At least, I couldn't.
The writing is deceptively simple, engaging, I was half-way through before I realized the magnitude of the narrative.
Individuals familiar with this author's Cracked pieces might be surprised by the depth and power of this novel. It contains all of the trademark humor and timely observation that the author is known for, but weaves them into a startlingly impactful psychological study of one man. A man who, incidentally, holds the same name as the author himself. We are told immediately, through profession and circumstance, that the author and character are not one in the same, but how closesly the Venn diagram of the two overlap is something for the interested reader to speculate.
The world this book inhabits is our world, but one where the internet has suddenly disappeared. A small band of misfits, whose lives have been upended by the loss, set out across New York City to find the internet and whoever is responsible for its vanishing. When recommending this book, I'd be unsure how to classify it. It's a mystery, it's a character study, it's comedic, it's romantic, but it transcends these categories. It's something much more. Like the best creations, it is a mirror of its time, displaying for us things we know but hadn't named.
Notes From The Internet Apocalypse is the rare sort of book that I wanted everyone to read: my brother, my boss, my best friend, my mom- anyone with an internet connection and a love of a well-told story.
tl;dr Loved it. 5 stars. Would (and will) read again
The writing is deceptively simple, engaging, I was half-way through before I realized the magnitude of the narrative.
Individuals familiar with this author's Cracked pieces might be surprised by the depth and power of this novel. It contains all of the trademark humor and timely observation that the author is known for, but weaves them into a startlingly impactful psychological study of one man. A man who, incidentally, holds the same name as the author himself. We are told immediately, through profession and circumstance, that the author and character are not one in the same, but how closesly the Venn diagram of the two overlap is something for the interested reader to speculate.
The world this book inhabits is our world, but one where the internet has suddenly disappeared. A small band of misfits, whose lives have been upended by the loss, set out across New York City to find the internet and whoever is responsible for its vanishing. When recommending this book, I'd be unsure how to classify it. It's a mystery, it's a character study, it's comedic, it's romantic, but it transcends these categories. It's something much more. Like the best creations, it is a mirror of its time, displaying for us things we know but hadn't named.
Notes From The Internet Apocalypse is the rare sort of book that I wanted everyone to read: my brother, my boss, my best friend, my mom- anyone with an internet connection and a love of a well-told story.
tl;dr Loved it. 5 stars. Would (and will) read again
May 14, 2014
URGH. I had high hopes for this title, as I am a librarian and spend a lot of time using the internet. The writing, the pacing, and the dialogue were all pretty terrible and forced. A lot of times it felt as if he wrote a scene just to throw in a zingy one-liner (ex: "I wanted to ask you about your sign...I pointed down to her posterboard, which read, GIVE IT BACK, to make it clear I wasn't talking about astrology" pg 61)--EYE ROLL. I might have liked this more had it been condensed down into a lengthy blog post, but as a full book, it was tough and I ended skimming large parts near the end.
October 31, 2013
I expected this book to be funny, but I didn't expect to have my heart ripped out and to question my whole existence. The brilliant satire and scathing social commentary leave you unprepared (deliberately, I expect) for the heart-wrenching gravity of the psychological thriller that eventuates. Given the prevalence of the Internet in our lives, one wonders how a book like this hasn't been written yet, but now that it has, it may be the most important novel the technology age has seen.
July 26, 2016
Satirical, full of geeky jokes, and heart-wrenching. I smiled or flat out laughed through most of the book. Then questioned my life at the end. Yet still I raced to GoodReads to throw out some random comments about what I thought, to an invisible audience.
Well played Mr Gladstone, well played.
Well played Mr Gladstone, well played.
November 26, 2014
I received a free copy of this book through the First-Reads giveaway.
Notes on the Internet Apocalypse is a satire of our internet habits and daily rituals online. The problem with satire is not that it is extremely hard to produce; rather it is that it is too easy. How does the author (Wayne Gladstone) satire the internet? Easily. It’s so easy anybody can do it. Just imagine any website operating offline and you’re done. Take for example, Reddit. How would you satire a Redditor, if he was forced to operate offline? Do you imagine a nerd clipping newspaper articles and sharing them with random people for approval? How about a YouTube user? Do you imagine people mindlessly watching random kittens on the streets? What about Twitter? That’s a hard one. Do you imagine people saying random uninteresting phrases out loud to strangers (under 144 characters (how clever of you))? If so, congratulations, you have just achieved the same level of satire you will find in the Internet Apocalypse. Any hack of a comedian can (and will) insert these types of observations into their set and apparently into their books.
Worse, the author doesn’t even trust his own abilities as a writer or perhaps he doesn’t trust the intelligence of his audience. Every single time the author makes a satirical observation, he makes sure to spoon feed it to you, so that you understand. So that you cannot possibly misunderstand. So that he destroys any chance that you might experience some joy when you recognize the subject of his observation on your own. God forbid that upon a second reading of the book, you might actually catch something you missed on the first go around. Thus, observations like “each wall of my theater had three plasma screen TVs stacked in a row, mutely revealing what was going on in the other rooms” is inevitably accompanied by the explanation “much like YouTube gave you other suggested videos.” I challenge the reader to find one satirical observation that is not pointed out to you. (Seriously, message me, I don’t mind being wrong)
The only thing that saves this book from being rated one star is the ending. Yes, it is a bit confusing, but if you can get pass the poorly handled literary device, you will find the author’s first honest attempt to say something about human nature. And that alone is worth one star.
Notes on the Internet Apocalypse is a satire of our internet habits and daily rituals online. The problem with satire is not that it is extremely hard to produce; rather it is that it is too easy. How does the author (Wayne Gladstone) satire the internet? Easily. It’s so easy anybody can do it. Just imagine any website operating offline and you’re done. Take for example, Reddit. How would you satire a Redditor, if he was forced to operate offline? Do you imagine a nerd clipping newspaper articles and sharing them with random people for approval? How about a YouTube user? Do you imagine people mindlessly watching random kittens on the streets? What about Twitter? That’s a hard one. Do you imagine people saying random uninteresting phrases out loud to strangers (under 144 characters (how clever of you))? If so, congratulations, you have just achieved the same level of satire you will find in the Internet Apocalypse. Any hack of a comedian can (and will) insert these types of observations into their set and apparently into their books.
Worse, the author doesn’t even trust his own abilities as a writer or perhaps he doesn’t trust the intelligence of his audience. Every single time the author makes a satirical observation, he makes sure to spoon feed it to you, so that you understand. So that you cannot possibly misunderstand. So that he destroys any chance that you might experience some joy when you recognize the subject of his observation on your own. God forbid that upon a second reading of the book, you might actually catch something you missed on the first go around. Thus, observations like “each wall of my theater had three plasma screen TVs stacked in a row, mutely revealing what was going on in the other rooms” is inevitably accompanied by the explanation “much like YouTube gave you other suggested videos.” I challenge the reader to find one satirical observation that is not pointed out to you. (Seriously, message me, I don’t mind being wrong)
The only thing that saves this book from being rated one star is the ending. Yes, it is a bit confusing, but if you can get pass the poorly handled literary device, you will find the author’s first honest attempt to say something about human nature. And that alone is worth one star.
May 23, 2014
Don't bother - this pile of worthless drivel is condescending to the extreme. It reads like the reddit comment history of a college freshman who's utterly convinced of his moral and intellectual superiority and won't hesitate to let you know just what a mindless sheeple you are for liking anything he deems ~unworthy~. I only made it to chapter 2 before giving up entirely with the fear that I'd roll my eyes so hard I'd detach a retina.
February 4, 2017
"Don't you realize the Internet is just a way for millions of sad people to be completely alone together?"
Initially I wanted to rate this book 3 stars, but the overall execution didn't convince me at all.
I love dystopias and I love them even more when they're related to the world of media. A world in which the Internet stops working for no apparent reason? People's reaction to the loss of it? Sign me up! My problem with the story though was that the satire in this book was very cheap. The author turned into reality the behaviours of various Internet users, such as the Youtubers, who trap cats in the streets trying to make them do something funny, or the Twitter users, who keep their speech pattern down to 140 characters. It might have been an interesting concept if it hadn't gotten tiresome after a while. Plus the story really didn't have a clear or believable plot and the characters weren't relatable at all. The ending was the most interesting part of this book. Its message could have been much more evident throughout the entire story though. People are lonely and deal with this loneliness creating new selves on the Internet. How does that show through in the real life? Can we make reality and virtuality coexist efficiently? Maybe the intent of the author was to leave some questions unanswered but I still do believe this was a great loss for the development of the plot, its characters and overall message.
Initially I wanted to rate this book 3 stars, but the overall execution didn't convince me at all.
I love dystopias and I love them even more when they're related to the world of media. A world in which the Internet stops working for no apparent reason? People's reaction to the loss of it? Sign me up! My problem with the story though was that the satire in this book was very cheap. The author turned into reality the behaviours of various Internet users, such as the Youtubers, who trap cats in the streets trying to make them do something funny, or the Twitter users, who keep their speech pattern down to 140 characters. It might have been an interesting concept if it hadn't gotten tiresome after a while. Plus the story really didn't have a clear or believable plot and the characters weren't relatable at all. The ending was the most interesting part of this book. Its message could have been much more evident throughout the entire story though. People are lonely and deal with this loneliness creating new selves on the Internet. How does that show through in the real life? Can we make reality and virtuality coexist efficiently? Maybe the intent of the author was to leave some questions unanswered but I still do believe this was a great loss for the development of the plot, its characters and overall message.
September 18, 2015
I'm not even sure that I realised that this would be one of those "silly" books. Eye-rollingly silly satire is so not my thing, but the idea of a dystopian novel based around an internet apocalypse was too much for me to pass up. Hopefully somebody will do the concept justice without resorting to cheap gags at some point, as it stands I started reading it and then resorted to groaning and skimming the further in I got, the more the terrible exaggerated humour piled up. I started to hate myself for even knowing the book existed. Perhaps this is "for the kids," those rapscallions who spend too much time on the internet as it is and whose idea of high brow literature slash only reading experience to date is whatever YA series has just been turned in to a movie franchise? That wouldn't surprise me. It also wouldn't surprise me that I didn't enjoy it because I'm a miserable sod and anyway I hate youtube videos, yes even that one that you think is really funny that everybody should be wetting themselves with laughter over, the one with the chicken and the kitten and the pelican and the drunken Irishman. At least it's only 200 pages of large print.
November 7, 2013
Okay, so this author, Wayne Gladstone, is a Cracked.com mainstay, and his Hate by Numbers series changed the way many of us critique our video feeds. When I picked up a preview of his upcoming novel, I expected a lot. The funny, the level vision, even the flashes of perplexed pain I’d met with in his columns. He’d already posted the original novella, and it seemed this would be a logical expansion, a fine time on a satirical adventure.
What I didn't expect? Characters that turn and meet my eyes. An inviting city under my feet. Encounters that render parodies human. Dread that latches on and turns pages, even as it has me denying solutions. Prose that doesn’t strike as pretty, but then it sticks. Images difficult to look at, like my father’s tears.
The fact that, even if you've read every column, every novella chapter, if you haven’t read his book, you haven't read Gladstone.
Not to say there’s no funny. Cat lovers beware, and tweeters, best learn to count while you talk. But whatever it is you’d miss, IMDB, Netflix streaming, your friends’ feed, those sites they block at work, all the silly, innocent connections we create with what we value, this Apocalypse betrays the nature of the Net we’ve made.
But now forget all that, because here's the real story, beyond and perhaps behind our online addictions: the Search. Love and meaning at our fingertips... if we could just find the keywords.
What I didn't expect? Characters that turn and meet my eyes. An inviting city under my feet. Encounters that render parodies human. Dread that latches on and turns pages, even as it has me denying solutions. Prose that doesn’t strike as pretty, but then it sticks. Images difficult to look at, like my father’s tears.
The fact that, even if you've read every column, every novella chapter, if you haven’t read his book, you haven't read Gladstone.
Not to say there’s no funny. Cat lovers beware, and tweeters, best learn to count while you talk. But whatever it is you’d miss, IMDB, Netflix streaming, your friends’ feed, those sites they block at work, all the silly, innocent connections we create with what we value, this Apocalypse betrays the nature of the Net we’ve made.
But now forget all that, because here's the real story, beyond and perhaps behind our online addictions: the Search. Love and meaning at our fingertips... if we could just find the keywords.
November 9, 2017
I don't know why this book has such a low rating. Going through other reviews, I can see a lot of 1-2* ratings. For me it was a rather quick, fun read. I thought this tongue-in-cheek story of a world with no internet had some sharp observations and was done rather well. 'No internet' as in one day it's there and suddenly it's gone. As opposed to a world where the internet was never invented, in which case, people might not really know what they're missing.
Since this is satire, I don't feel the need to analyse it too seriously. Sure, it pokes fun at many sub-groups of online denizens but you can't deny that many of the stereotypes levelled at them are to a certain extent true or self-inflicted. I might even say they reflect secretly-held views of a significant portion of society who just don't want to admit it explicitly for the sake of PC'ness.
Final rating: 3.5*
Since this is satire, I don't feel the need to analyse it too seriously. Sure, it pokes fun at many sub-groups of online denizens but you can't deny that many of the stereotypes levelled at them are to a certain extent true or self-inflicted. I might even say they reflect secretly-held views of a significant portion of society who just don't want to admit it explicitly for the sake of PC'ness.
Final rating: 3.5*
April 26, 2014
Very disappointing. A great premise but fizzles out after about 20 pages and flatlines from there. Aspires to the humorous style of Terry Pratchett but never comes close.
January 20, 2015
About all I can say about this is, "meh". Humorous at the start, the Internet puns got old really fast, and it was like slogging through middle school humor for most of the book.
July 2, 2015
“No wonder you miss the Net so much. Where else can you be all-powerful and completely inconsequential at the same time?”
I posted an insulting comment online the other day. Not on Goodreads, of course, but on a certain “literary” site known for wretched attempts at "satire," it was just such a smug, contemptible, heaping of ignorance, I felt compelled to toss in my own two cents. Not really something I tend to do, even online, but I could definitely feel a bit of the appeal of the loss of all censoring impulses on the web. It was a pointless gesture, of course. Poe’s Law, you know. Still, would I say anything in real life? No.
I bring this up as a segue into my response to reading Wayne Gladstone's quick paced, genre defying satirical novel, Notes From the Internet Apocalypse. Both a satire of online habits and an exploration of the meaning of self and our reactions to grief, Notes hits with a furious mixture of pathos, thoughtfulness, and dick jokes, tossing out a thousand interesting ideas, from the nature of our relationship with information to our own self identities. Not unlike the subject it tackles. On the other hand, the novel takes on so much, that it almost feels over stuffed in spite of its fast pace; the quixotic quest of its unreliable narrator, a dozen aspects of online life put forth for examination, exploring the ramifications of a generation lived under the constant stimulation of the internet, and what this means for our culture, particularly among men under 40.
Notes from the Internet Apocalypse takes the forms of the journal of one Gladstone, a 30-something schlump whose life has hit a low point; having recently lost his wife, his career, and his only source of solace aside from a flask of scotch… the internet. Something, or someone, has killed the internet and conspiracies abound, spread now by word of mouth. As society begins a slow collapse, the government cracks down on protesters, aimless millennials wander around looking for replacements for their web, annoying anyone in their path, and Gladstone, lacking anything better to do, attempts to track down the secret in the tradition of a film noir private eye. Aided and foiled by his two friends, Tobey (a former web writer and manchild) and Oz (an Australian camgirl) they encounter various factions and characters who all wish to return the internet for their own gains, including a psychic former librarian who pegs Gladstone himself as the Internet Messiah.
Written by Cracked columnist Wayne Gladstone, the novel definitely shares this website’s style; irreverent, crude, glib. This is both a strength and a weakness. Gladstone’s alter ego struggles with his own life and used the internet to distract himself from it. At times, the book reads like a collection of anecdotes imagining what subcultures users of Twitter or 4Chan would form offline, while at other times on philosophical implications of the internet itself. On occasion, the points and political asides seem a bit heavy handed, at others vague, but there is so much to think about and quite a lot of humor too. Would we ever be able to go back to a time without instant connections, now that we have grown accustomed to it? In the end, it is all personal.
As an aside, as a librarian, I have a somewhat fraught relationship with the internet. It is by far the most powerful tool I can use, and it is important that we keep abreast of its power. You know, I used to keep lists of my library and the books I’ve read in print. Now, with Goodreads, and LibraryThing, and BookLikes, there’s no need. If the internet disappeared, I fear even my knowledge of the books I read, my own books, would disappear too. Have I read at all it if I have not rated it and tagged it and social networked it on my accounts? Has this become a problem, or a blessing?
August 24, 2014
Comencé a leer el libro cuando mi modem se dañó y comencé a sufrir el síndrome de abstinencia de internet, no sólo no podía consultar cosas en Wikipedia o actualizar mis correos para trabajar, es que ¡no podía ni pensar!
La premisa del libro, - un día el mundo amanece sin internet - , es genial, al igual que los primeros capítulos: las empresas dan los días libres porque no se puede trabajar sin internet, aparecen los zombies de internet, se hacen "círculos de blog" donde los "internautas sin internet" pueden emular la red o "stand up comedy" de 120 caracteres para suplir la falta de twitter, por no hablar de las dificultades del protagonista la única noche que decide tratar de "coquetear" en un bar, que es francamente hilarante. Algunas citas:
Como buen libro de ciencia ficción, tiene su desarrollo convencional, el héroe, que no sabe que es el héroe, debe rescatar internet, conseguir a sus compañeros en la búsqueda, enfrentarse a enemigos y entender las pistas de los "oráculos". En algunos momentos, no entendía las referencias, tal vez por no utilizar internet como los gringos o como los jóvenes de hoy.
Pero va perdiendo fuerza mientras avanza, lo original se convierte en convencional, y el final es francamente decepcionante, apenas un grado (muy pequeño) por encima del "y entonces me desperté". Al menos, no es una saga de 5 libros para llegar al mismo final decepcionante.
En resumen, un buen rato para pasar el rato y reflexionar un poco sobre el alcance de internet en nuestras vidas.
La premisa del libro, - un día el mundo amanece sin internet - , es genial, al igual que los primeros capítulos: las empresas dan los días libres porque no se puede trabajar sin internet, aparecen los zombies de internet, se hacen "círculos de blog" donde los "internautas sin internet" pueden emular la red o "stand up comedy" de 120 caracteres para suplir la falta de twitter, por no hablar de las dificultades del protagonista la única noche que decide tratar de "coquetear" en un bar, que es francamente hilarante. Algunas citas:
“Working remotely or not even remotely working?”
"No wonder you miss the Net so much. Where else can you be all-powerful and completely inconsequential at the same time?”
"Don’t you realize the Internet is just a way for millions of sad people to be completely alone together?”
Como buen libro de ciencia ficción, tiene su desarrollo convencional, el héroe, que no sabe que es el héroe, debe rescatar internet, conseguir a sus compañeros en la búsqueda, enfrentarse a enemigos y entender las pistas de los "oráculos". En algunos momentos, no entendía las referencias, tal vez por no utilizar internet como los gringos o como los jóvenes de hoy.
Pero va perdiendo fuerza mientras avanza, lo original se convierte en convencional, y el final es francamente decepcionante, apenas un grado (muy pequeño) por encima del "y entonces me desperté". Al menos, no es una saga de 5 libros para llegar al mismo final decepcionante.
En resumen, un buen rato para pasar el rato y reflexionar un poco sobre el alcance de internet en nuestras vidas.
March 25, 2014
Somewhere on the comedy spectrum between A Confederacy of Dunces and The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy, Notes from the Internet Apocalypse could find a happy home. The jokes are solid, the story is sufficient. It's a quick, easy read for a highly amusing commentary on the current state of technology from 2005 to today.
I have a slight concern about the material's longevity, but only time will tell on that one. While references to 4Chan and Ducklips feel ripe for comedy in 2014, it's tough to say how relevant they'll feel when my children are old enough to enjoy. The other comedy stylings I compared it to have proved timeless, but even the Blackberry mentioned in Notes will seem like an ancient relic a decade from now.
Regardless, what matters is right now and right now I really, really enjoyed it. Read it in the next five years and you should have a great time.
I have a slight concern about the material's longevity, but only time will tell on that one. While references to 4Chan and Ducklips feel ripe for comedy in 2014, it's tough to say how relevant they'll feel when my children are old enough to enjoy. The other comedy stylings I compared it to have proved timeless, but even the Blackberry mentioned in Notes will seem like an ancient relic a decade from now.
Regardless, what matters is right now and right now I really, really enjoyed it. Read it in the next five years and you should have a great time.
October 28, 2013
Brilliant. Our internet was out after a big thunderstorm so I've experienced just an iota of the feelings of helplessness and confusion that the author captures so compellingly in this novel. Based on the title and concept, I thought it was going to be some sort of creepy dystopian horror show but it was funny, disturbing and fascinating from start to finish. The characters are well developed there are great surprises along the way. I was 100% on board and can't stop thinking about what might happen next. Highly recommend!
July 6, 2015
Notes from the Internet Apocalypse is a bit of an odd one. To try to classify it would mean to call it a Comedy Sci-Fi Mystery Psychological Epic Thriller or something among those lines. It manages to be all these things and transition between them seamlessly, while somehow managing not to forget how to be fun.
Some have criticized it for having a character narrator which is also a fictionalized version of the author, but the character is so deeply flawed that it's as far removed from narcissism as it possibly could be. Gladstone (the character) and his ragtag group of adult children sometimes deal with mature issues that are perpetually lingering in the background and creep up on the reader, sometimes forcing you to reassess previous scenes or character actions.
It's also easy to relate to, possibly hitting close to home for some readers on the topic of internet dependency and even addiction. I think it would be a bit of an exaggeration to say it gave me existential dread from time to time, but it's worth mentioning that I thought to use the term "existential dread" at all.
The book is not without flaw, the most glaring of which being that in dealing with such a volatile topic as The Internet, the book is inevitably dated. It contains references to now defunct or at least no longer mainstream websites like Chat Roulette or Digg and a few others. It's clearly a product of its time and captures the "Internet Zeitgeist", if you will, well enough, but I can't feel that in a few short years this book would be in need of a new edition containing a footnote here and there.
However, all this being said, if you're a fan of the genres I listed above, and have spent your share of time online during the last few years, you might get a kick out of it. Highly recommended and looking forward for more from the author.
Some have criticized it for having a character narrator which is also a fictionalized version of the author, but the character is so deeply flawed that it's as far removed from narcissism as it possibly could be. Gladstone (the character) and his ragtag group of adult children sometimes deal with mature issues that are perpetually lingering in the background and creep up on the reader, sometimes forcing you to reassess previous scenes or character actions.
It's also easy to relate to, possibly hitting close to home for some readers on the topic of internet dependency and even addiction. I think it would be a bit of an exaggeration to say it gave me existential dread from time to time, but it's worth mentioning that I thought to use the term "existential dread" at all.
The book is not without flaw, the most glaring of which being that in dealing with such a volatile topic as The Internet, the book is inevitably dated. It contains references to now defunct or at least no longer mainstream websites like Chat Roulette or Digg and a few others. It's clearly a product of its time and captures the "Internet Zeitgeist", if you will, well enough, but I can't feel that in a few short years this book would be in need of a new edition containing a footnote here and there.
However, all this being said, if you're a fan of the genres I listed above, and have spent your share of time online during the last few years, you might get a kick out of it. Highly recommended and looking forward for more from the author.
March 3, 2014
disclaimer – i won an advanced reader’s copy of this novel through goodreads’ first reads program.
how would you handle the loss of the internet? not just a brief outage, but a complete and total shutdown for an unknown reason. think about it – no goodreads, no bloggess, no twitter. in notes from the internet apocalypse that’s exactly what happens and the world goes crazy. there are “zombie” groups in new york trying to fill the gaping holes left in their lives. and out of this darkness comes a prophet with news of a saviour. an internet messiah who will bring the ‘net back.
let’s be clear, i was expecting something completely different from wayne gladstone‘s novel. satire, biting humour, the overarching question of what we would do if the internet went away, i was prepared for all of that. what i wasn’t expecting was a story that would leave me heartbroken. a story that would actually have me questioning the ways i use the internet. a story that really made me look at the differences between the people i called my friends a decade ago and the people i call my friends now. gladstone’s novel is social commentary with an unexpected soul.
four out of five stars
how would you handle the loss of the internet? not just a brief outage, but a complete and total shutdown for an unknown reason. think about it – no goodreads, no bloggess, no twitter. in notes from the internet apocalypse that’s exactly what happens and the world goes crazy. there are “zombie” groups in new york trying to fill the gaping holes left in their lives. and out of this darkness comes a prophet with news of a saviour. an internet messiah who will bring the ‘net back.
let’s be clear, i was expecting something completely different from wayne gladstone‘s novel. satire, biting humour, the overarching question of what we would do if the internet went away, i was prepared for all of that. what i wasn’t expecting was a story that would leave me heartbroken. a story that would actually have me questioning the ways i use the internet. a story that really made me look at the differences between the people i called my friends a decade ago and the people i call my friends now. gladstone’s novel is social commentary with an unexpected soul.
four out of five stars
February 3, 2016
I liked this book more than a self- respecting 30 something year old should have, according to the messages I'm getting from the other reviews on Goodreads. It's true that the story's satire of the internet- bound isn't anything "new" but why would we expect it to be? The messages in this story aren't revolutionary, but they are worth considering. Again. You've undoubtedly considered them before.
The fictionalized Gladstone is trying to figure out how to navigate with humanity again after the loss of his wife, and suddenly, there is also no internet. Can he find it? More importantly, would finding the internet make him happy? Will whiskey?
There's a reason why I don't read reviews before I read a book.
The fictionalized Gladstone is trying to figure out how to navigate with humanity again after the loss of his wife, and suddenly, there is also no internet. Can he find it? More importantly, would finding the internet make him happy? Will whiskey?
There's a reason why I don't read reviews before I read a book.
April 24, 2014
The cover blurb said if I liked Chuck Palahniuk and David Wong, I would love this book.
I hate both of those authors, but this book seemed promising enough to pick up, and I'm glad I did.
The ending was the reason those other authors were cited, and I'll admit that part let me down a little. But there were so many "Ah! I love that!" or "Hah! So true!" moments in the book that I loved it anyway.
I hate both of those authors, but this book seemed promising enough to pick up, and I'm glad I did.
The ending was the reason those other authors were cited, and I'll admit that part let me down a little. But there were so many "Ah! I love that!" or "Hah! So true!" moments in the book that I loved it anyway.
December 19, 2015
I wasn't expecting this book, based on the title and description, to be a touching and thoughtful look at the human experience. The book is satire. It is full of internet jokes and porn references. But there is so much more than that. Perhaps it is my own experience of loss and depression that influence me to give the book such a high rating. But any book that makes me laugh and cry and ponder throughout deserves my attention.
September 4, 2014
Heartfelt, honest and hilarious. Hard to put down. I actually lol'd IRL. You, or someone you know are a character in this wonderful novel. Also, it's sexy. And sweet. Stop what you're doing, buy this book, read this book, then get off your computer and go interact with the world. I'm aware of the irony of using this technology in order to decry it.
December 27, 2015
If we are not actually addicted, we are so used to having everything the internet has to offer at our fingertips, that it is really not difficult to imagine the chaos that might ensue were it to disappear. This book did not make me laugh out loud; it made me chuckle in a most sobering kind of way. I was entertained and I never even saw the ending coming. This book was a treat.
July 8, 2022
There was potential for this to be a fantastic story, but alas, it was not. I was not amused or entertained with the "witty satire." This book is like the guy at a party that's trying too hard to be cool (if that makes any sense). The exaggerated crass humor had me rolling me eyes. It was hard to finish.
January 5, 2015
I love books that surprise me...the ones that you pick up expecting one thing and getting something else entirely. If I were to base the review on that criteria alone, I'd give it 5 stars. This was a great read; full of wit and fun, but strangely heartfelt at the same time. Highly recommend!
March 19, 2014
I read this all in one sitting on my day off. Its a perfect mash-up of witty satire and totally spot on references. I like that it speaks the truth about our internet addicted generation, while still telling a story of a neurotic yet loveable character.
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