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288 pages, Hardcover
First published August 1, 2014


this was hard. and time consuming.


Most of the metal bands who sang about worshipping Satan in the 1980s weren’t really Satanists any more than Michael Jackson was really a zombie, but some of the bands in Norway actually went around burning churches, killing each other, and eating bits of each others’ brains in stews, like they didn’t realize they were just supposed to pretend they did shit like that to sell records.
“When you get a job you like, you should lock it down.”







“You do realize your characters would be better off without you, right?”
"But I suppose you shouldn't look for symbolism in people's work uniforms."
It's like going to someone else's church: Stand when they stand, sit when they sit, and hope you don't end up getting sacrificed with a big knife or something.
"So instead of saying 'I dare you to,' you say 'I give you permission to.' And you can either do it or not. It's kind of liberating in a way."
Being in Oak Meadow Mills could be like being inside one of those mirror mazes that they had at the fair.
I continued my basic routine of saying the stupidest shit possible.
There was a chance that I was playing a part in some pretty ugly stuff, in an offhand sort of way, but so is everyone else with a job, if you think about it. Just about everyone who works is earning money for CEOs who may not be the world's greatest human beings.
"I hear that if a guy takes no for an answer and doesn't text you pictures of his scrotum, he's probably ahead of the curve."
"I wasn't getting any sympathy from the devil, though. Stan was laughing his ass off at me."