And so Appleseed Rectory is a place of shifting outlines and imploded vacuums; it is a place of lagging time and false memory, a place of street sadness, night fatigue and cancelled sex.
And I thought Success ended poorly. Wow, I spoke too soon. Success has an utterly fantastic, awesome ending compared to Dead Babies. Like … seriously. This is a funny book, no doubt. Amis clearly hates humanity and his satirical, dark humour is very clever and engaging. Dead Babies follows a household of various twenty-year-olds who are all completely fucked up. There’s little Keith, the 4”11 dwarf who wants desperately to be tall. Andy, a completely unrealistic, hyper-aggressive and hyper-sexual ape. Lucy, the so called “whore with a heart of gold.” There’s also, my favourite, Giles (is it pronounced Guy-els?), a constantly drunk shut-in who is paranoid about his teeth and anyone mentioning teeth.
The book has very little of an actual story. It really just follows Keith, Diana, Lucy, Andy, Celia and co. as some American friends come over for the weekend, bringing with them drugs, sex, misery and pain. Despite its lack of conventional story there were enough interesting things going for most of the book to hold my interest. It was interesting seeing all the various characters and learning more about them, how they ended up at the house, how fucked up they really are. I mentioned this is a funny book, and it really is.
If you know me, dear reader, you’ll know it takes a certain something for a book/movie to make me laugh out loud. Usually, it takes horribly, horribly dark, twisted humour, shock humour, etc. I’m assuming if you’ve read/are thinking about reading a book titled Dead Babies you have that humour. I can see a lot of the jokes in here not appealing to everyone, though. An example of this is little Keith (the dwarf) who hasn’t been with a girl for years and years. He resolves to kill himself if he doesn’t get some this weekend.
Very dark, yet very funny. Another example:
“All right then,” said Keith. “Well, as I told you, it’s quite straightforward. No one likes me – actually most people dislike me instinctively, including my family – I’m not much good at my work, I’ve never had a girl-friend or a friend of any kind, I’ve got very little imagination, nothing makes me laugh, I’m fat, poor, bald, I’ve got a horrible spotty face, constipation, B.O., bad breath, no prick and I’m one inch tall. That’s why I’m mad now. Fair enough?”
“Yes,” said the doctor.
The whole book reads as a satire. Apparently it’s a satire of the 70’s but to me it’s just a satire on people in general. The prose is very, very sharp. It actually surprised me to discover this was written in the 70’s, because it reads like something written now. So, yes, I mostly enjoyed Dead Babies. It rambles a little bit, goes into exposition a little too much (depicting with [by the end of the book, often excruciating] detail exactly how the characters got to the communal house), and doesn’t really have a story, but it’s not bad, not at all. The last act of the book tries to introduce a whodunit-type subplot, where someone from the house is going around and causing mischief to all the characters, calling himself “Johnny” but this just falls completely flat and is not interesting.
We now have to descend into the bad of this book. Despite the many funny moments, the sharp prose, and the quick pacing, the novel does delve into pretension by the end. This was something I noticed throughout the book, but it really became apparent as I approached the last act of Dead Babies. The words. The words. The horribly pretentious, obnoxious, David-Foster Wallace-level annoyingness of some of the words in this book. You may ask me, Isaac, how can mere words ruin an enjoyable reading experience? Allow me to show you. Declension. Aphorism. Vertiginous. Recondite. Adduced. Concertina-ed. Sudary.
And many, many more.
Why do authors do this? I’m an author and I can’t comprehend it. You have a thoroughly enjoyable (though not perfect) story, and you choose to throw in these words, these ten-dollar words that no one could possibly know, that utterly break the immersion of the novel! Far too many times I was pulled out of Dead Babies, quizzical look on my face, wondering what the hell Martin Amis was thinking when he thought these words were okay to use. No, Martin, they’re not okay.
It just comes across as desperate, to be honest. Desperate to be seen as smarter than you actually are. That’s the definition of pretension, folks.
“Actually, Martin,” Giles would say, “those words are kinda shit. What’s happening at the end of Dead Babies? Did you know how to end it? Why am I doing this, Martin? Martin, put the thesaurus down, actually!”