The story line was good and it picked up momentum early on. My only complaints are the number of typos, at one point valyn's name wasn't even valyn, it was sophie and I had to stop and think for a second to realize it was just the wrong name typed in, not some random character. There were several sentences through out that I would have to re-read because they didn't make sense due to typos such as He instead of heard and so on. A good proof reading would really help. Also, the ending....VERY rushed. I kept thinking "no way can she wrap this up in the next 2 pages" but yep...*****spoiler***** want to live here, sure, ok,....the end. It just was a disappointing ending, I realize there might be a 2nd one....but it doesn't change the fact of how this one was rushed.