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Fight or Flight #3
Now or Never
To move on, Leave the past behind, And build a new life with Jay. That’s all Em wanted. After everything they’d been through together, they were both overdue their ‘happily ever after’. Too bad the world doesn’t work that way. Memories last longer than dreams and Em’s fears continue to plague her both day and night, interfering with that new life she so desperately craves. To start over, Secure a future, And give Em the life she deserves. That was Jay’s plan, but the past isn’t done with them, yet. While Em still struggles to overcome the ghosts of her past, Jay is forced to come face to face with his. When the skeletons in his closet step back into the light, Jay must decide what he will do—and what he will sacrifice—to protect Em from them. Against all odds, Em and Jay are on the verge of having everything they’ve ever wanted. They’ve fought for it before, but is their love strong enough to endure any more heartache? The time has come for each of them to choose for themselves whether or not they will allow the past to continue to corrupt their future. And, together, they must decide, will it be . . . Now or Never? Contains instances of abuse (physical/ sexual) and strong language. Not suitable for all readers.
381 pages, Kindle Edition
First published October 21, 2013
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January 21, 2016Aside from a rushed, dissatisfying, and not very believable ending, I found book one of Fight or Flight to be a very poignant and interesting read.
Al, who was a secondary character in book one, seemed to be a smart, resourceful girl with her own hard realities. When I saw book two would feature Al, I was thrilled.
Sadly, as I read book two... well, BB says it best
The thrill is gone~
So Is Al
Al was the streetwise chick in book one who was strong, intelligent, resourceful, cautious, and courageous.
We get a glimpse of that girl in the opening chapter of book one, but the second she steps foot home...
ALL traces of the AL from book one vanish. Her fear and submission is understandable in theory, but NOT how this was written and not to the degree that even her inner spirit becomes hopeless and resigned WITHOUT a real cause for it!
Illogical Shit
So, Al is this frightened little mouse now that she's back under the heavy hand of her abusive father. Al wants to ensure her dying mother is cared for and not alone in her final moments. This means she is once again her dad's punching bag and prisoner in his home.
^^^Understandable reasoning IF Al didn't always complain in the same breath how her mom never loved her or helped her during any of the abuse. NOT a single kind word or memory for this mom that she's now sacrificed her freedom and safety to return to care for?!? So WTF would she go back to care for her under such dangers?!? Who knows? Illogical shit, but I could've given this element leeway if not for...
More Illogical Shit
I feel like I'm chasing the logic of the plot, trying my best to find ANY reason for what's happening.
EPIC Fail...
Long time on and off again love, Dean, is pissed that Al left him without a word six months ago after he told her he loved her, & he is now determined to know all the whys.
While Dean was always too busy working and caring for his own poor, single-mom house to see that Al was abused, it was actually his new found prying and Al's fear that he'd find out that sent her running for his and her own safety.
Again, all this ^^^ is understandable at first glance. She believes her father will kill them both of his dirty secret is exposed - run and/or push Dean away. Fine enough. But then the author decides...
When the mom dies near the middle of the book, I know this shit is about to get bad.
Her excuse , uhm reason, for being there is GONE and so is any semblance of logic in this book!
Dean is there offering her an out. She could run again. She could simply show her battered body to the nearest cop. What does she do? She goes back to her father's house and REMAINS his maid/prisoner/on-hand punching bag/ zombie.
Why? Wtf could guess?!? It makes zero fucking sense, and isn't even attempted to be explained beyond she's too weak to go back to the streets and feels like a...
Illogical Atop Illogical Atop Illogical =
We get a diary of her dreams, cleaning, beatings, and white ceiling gazing. Interesting times.
Meanwhile...
When Dean finally fucking gets a clue that the love of his life has been being beaten for the last decade or so and that Al isn't pushing him away because she doesn't love him *eyeroll,* we get to spend the next umpteen dozen chapters as he broods in Romeo fashion on his front steps; punches walls; and muses about his school, work, and her getting the shit beat out of her while he's sitting there thinking about all the above DAY AFTER DAY AFTER DAY AFTER WEEK AFTER WEEK. Heroic, aye?
I shit you not...around 30% of this mfing book is him sitting around..
... because he's determined she's right and he can't do anything to help her.
Until... Bam...
He's sees daddy more drunk than usual *lmao* and finds his balls decides...
End My Misery Already
Congrats, Dean! It's over..
Oh, no, it can't be that easy. Not when we have oh, I don't know, at least 30 minutes to kill so that we can clear up where the guilt over the abuse, deaths, and sitting about like zombies all belonged. Surprise... It's the dad's fault, and it only took a the entire book to get there.
Lest I forget the mysterious hang-up calls that have plagued Al since she arrived home. That had to be cleared up in a paragraph-long convo with a child. Police report? Really? Against someone that's DEAD. Baha.
And, I certainly can't forget to tell you the importance of the little high school cocky bastard that makes several cameos to stir Dean up...
And on that note...
Bottom Line
Extremely disappointing, especially if you've read book one. There's no logic, reasoning behind the character's actions. There's no build up, climax, resolve, and conclusion flow to this book at all; it's a flat, monotone pace. It completely lacked the realism and poignance of book one. One star.
Al, who was a secondary character in book one, seemed to be a smart, resourceful girl with her own hard realities. When I saw book two would feature Al, I was thrilled.
Sadly, as I read book two... well, BB says it best
The thrill is gone~
So Is Al
Al was the streetwise chick in book one who was strong, intelligent, resourceful, cautious, and courageous.
We get a glimpse of that girl in the opening chapter of book one, but the second she steps foot home...
ALL traces of the AL from book one vanish. Her fear and submission is understandable in theory, but NOT how this was written and not to the degree that even her inner spirit becomes hopeless and resigned WITHOUT a real cause for it!
Illogical Shit
So, Al is this frightened little mouse now that she's back under the heavy hand of her abusive father. Al wants to ensure her dying mother is cared for and not alone in her final moments. This means she is once again her dad's punching bag and prisoner in his home.
^^^Understandable reasoning IF Al didn't always complain in the same breath how her mom never loved her or helped her during any of the abuse. NOT a single kind word or memory for this mom that she's now sacrificed her freedom and safety to return to care for?!? So WTF would she go back to care for her under such dangers?!? Who knows? Illogical shit, but I could've given this element leeway if not for...
More Illogical Shit
I feel like I'm chasing the logic of the plot, trying my best to find ANY reason for what's happening.
EPIC Fail...
Long time on and off again love, Dean, is pissed that Al left him without a word six months ago after he told her he loved her, & he is now determined to know all the whys.
While Dean was always too busy working and caring for his own poor, single-mom house to see that Al was abused, it was actually his new found prying and Al's fear that he'd find out that sent her running for his and her own safety.
Again, all this ^^^ is understandable at first glance. She believes her father will kill them both of his dirty secret is exposed - run and/or push Dean away. Fine enough. But then the author decides...
When the mom dies near the middle of the book, I know this shit is about to get bad.
Her excuse , uhm reason, for being there is GONE and so is any semblance of logic in this book!
Dean is there offering her an out. She could run again. She could simply show her battered body to the nearest cop. What does she do? She goes back to her father's house and REMAINS his maid/prisoner/on-hand punching bag/ zombie.
Why? Wtf could guess?!? It makes zero fucking sense, and isn't even attempted to be explained beyond she's too weak to go back to the streets and feels like a...
Illogical Atop Illogical Atop Illogical =
We get a diary of her dreams, cleaning, beatings, and white ceiling gazing. Interesting times.
Meanwhile...
When Dean finally fucking gets a clue that the love of his life has been being beaten for the last decade or so and that Al isn't pushing him away because she doesn't love him *eyeroll,* we get to spend the next umpteen dozen chapters as he broods in Romeo fashion on his front steps; punches walls; and muses about his school, work, and her getting the shit beat out of her while he's sitting there thinking about all the above DAY AFTER DAY AFTER DAY AFTER WEEK AFTER WEEK. Heroic, aye?
I shit you not...around 30% of this mfing book is him sitting around..
... because he's determined she's right and he can't do anything to help her.
Until... Bam...
He's sees daddy more drunk than usual *lmao* and
End My Misery Already
Congrats, Dean! It's over..
Oh, no, it can't be that easy. Not when we have oh, I don't know, at least 30 minutes to kill so that we can clear up where the guilt over the abuse, deaths, and sitting about like zombies all belonged. Surprise... It's the dad's fault, and it only took a the entire book to get there.
Lest I forget the mysterious hang-up calls that have plagued Al since she arrived home. That had to be cleared up in a paragraph-long convo with a child. Police report? Really? Against someone that's DEAD. Baha.
And, I certainly can't forget to tell you the importance of the little high school cocky bastard that makes several cameos to stir Dean up...
And on that note...
Bottom Line
Extremely disappointing, especially if you've read book one. There's no logic, reasoning behind the character's actions. There's no build up, climax, resolve, and conclusion flow to this book at all; it's a flat, monotone pace. It completely lacked the realism and poignance of book one. One star.
January 2, 2018
Actual rating - 3.5
October 23, 2013
As most people know by now, I'm a fan of Jamie Canosa. Two of my all-time favorite books are Dissidence and Our Own Worst Enemies, both by Jamie. She has a real knack for writing characters that stay with you, and Em and Jay are no exceptions. It isn't often that I like a sequel better than the original (though it does happen, and seems to happen a lot with Jamie's books) and in the case of Now or Never Jamie has taken the story she began with Fight or Flight and made it that much more intriguing. They might be off the streets but that doesn't mean life has gotten easy for these two. Jay and Em are sympathetic and admirable, and their love story can make even the Grinch's heart beat faster. I absolutely recommend this or any other book by Jamie Canosa.
August 13, 2015
Jamie had me from the very first word, on the very first page. Now or Never is proof that even the most truest of loves can be tested, that sometimes faith isn't enough, that sometimes relying on someone else isn't a sign of weakness, but a sign of strength. Once again, my only criticism is that it was too short. I'm not ready to say goodbye to Em and Jay. I want more!!
Full review @ http://chroniclesofabooknerd.blogspot...
Full review @ http://chroniclesofabooknerd.blogspot...
October 27, 2013
"You brought back my reason to live. You are my reason, Em. You're the reason for every breath I breathe. Every beat of my heart belongs to you."
Now or Never was a heart-wrenching, emotional whirlwind of a book! It continues the emotional story of Jay and Em as they struggle to find their Happy Ever After! I loved this book! Completely loved it! In my opinion it may have been slightly better then Fight or Flight, which I can't believe I'm saying as I loved Fight or Flight! This book was all about realising what's right in front of you and that sometimes you have to suffer to come out better at the other end! The plot of this book was so amazing! It was so fast paced and you had no idea what was around the corner! I was completely engrossed in it and I didn't want to put it down until I had finished it! The plot was heart-breaking as the main characters suffer even more than what they did in the first book! I wasn't expecting them to go through even more suffering, but they did and in a way the ending was completely worth every bit of suffering they went through! I was an emotional wreck throughout this book as I wanted the main characters to finally catch a break and to be happy, but sometimes you have to suffer to find happiness and this is exactly what the main characters in this series had to do! The characters were again amazing! Em was still main female character and in the last book, Em was a broken girl trying to find her strength again! In this book she's a girl who's conquered so much, but still has such a long way to go! I wanted Em to find her Happily Ever After because she deserved too! She had been through so much already that I wanted her to be happy and live a secure life! I loved her in this book as she took so much on and she didn't give up! Jay was again the main male character and my heart completely broke for him in this book! He tried so hard to make ends meet for him and Em and he just had so much difficulty doing so! I completely admired Jay in this book as in a way it was more his book than Em's! Jay was still the same lovable guy from the first book that feels the pressure of trying to settle down with the girl he loves, but faces some serious difficulties along the way, which made my heart break for him! I wanted him and Em to be happy and not to have to suffer anymore! They were still completely in love though, which I loved! I also loved that this book was again written from both Jay and Em's point of views as there was quite a lot going on and it was definitely essential to give this book its full potential! I don't think there's going to be another book to Jay and Em's story, but I'm seriously happy that the author gave them another book! This was the complete right thing to do! I have loved Jay and Em's emotional story and I'm really sad to see it come to an end! I do sort of see potential for another book or a novella though, as the ending of this book was a little unresolved! I read this book when it didn't have a cover and I didn't have a cover in mind for it, but the actual cover is stunning! Absolutely stunning! I love it and also how well it suits the cover for the first book! Big thank you to Jamie for an ARC of Now or Never and also for having me on her Blog Tour!
Now or Never was a heart-wrenching, emotional whirlwind of a book! It continues the emotional story of Jay and Em as they struggle to find their Happy Ever After! I loved this book! Completely loved it! In my opinion it may have been slightly better then Fight or Flight, which I can't believe I'm saying as I loved Fight or Flight! This book was all about realising what's right in front of you and that sometimes you have to suffer to come out better at the other end! The plot of this book was so amazing! It was so fast paced and you had no idea what was around the corner! I was completely engrossed in it and I didn't want to put it down until I had finished it! The plot was heart-breaking as the main characters suffer even more than what they did in the first book! I wasn't expecting them to go through even more suffering, but they did and in a way the ending was completely worth every bit of suffering they went through! I was an emotional wreck throughout this book as I wanted the main characters to finally catch a break and to be happy, but sometimes you have to suffer to find happiness and this is exactly what the main characters in this series had to do! The characters were again amazing! Em was still main female character and in the last book, Em was a broken girl trying to find her strength again! In this book she's a girl who's conquered so much, but still has such a long way to go! I wanted Em to find her Happily Ever After because she deserved too! She had been through so much already that I wanted her to be happy and live a secure life! I loved her in this book as she took so much on and she didn't give up! Jay was again the main male character and my heart completely broke for him in this book! He tried so hard to make ends meet for him and Em and he just had so much difficulty doing so! I completely admired Jay in this book as in a way it was more his book than Em's! Jay was still the same lovable guy from the first book that feels the pressure of trying to settle down with the girl he loves, but faces some serious difficulties along the way, which made my heart break for him! I wanted him and Em to be happy and not to have to suffer anymore! They were still completely in love though, which I loved! I also loved that this book was again written from both Jay and Em's point of views as there was quite a lot going on and it was definitely essential to give this book its full potential! I don't think there's going to be another book to Jay and Em's story, but I'm seriously happy that the author gave them another book! This was the complete right thing to do! I have loved Jay and Em's emotional story and I'm really sad to see it come to an end! I do sort of see potential for another book or a novella though, as the ending of this book was a little unresolved! I read this book when it didn't have a cover and I didn't have a cover in mind for it, but the actual cover is stunning! Absolutely stunning! I love it and also how well it suits the cover for the first book! Big thank you to Jamie for an ARC of Now or Never and also for having me on her Blog Tour!
May 20, 2013
When I first read the first book in this series, Fight or Flight, I was absolutely blown away by Jay and Em's story. I was captivated. I wanted to push it on everyone as an example of really wonderful YA/NA contemporary with issues that was EXCELLENT. Then came Sink or Swim, the following title (or the #1.5, you could say), and I felt exactly the same way. Needless to say, I've been sitting on pins and needles waiting for Now or Never, which is the continuation of Em and Jay's story beyond Fight or Flight and YOU GUYS I STILL LOVE THEM AND WAS NOT DISAPPOINTED.
And I still want everyone to pick up these books and begin reading them. They are so fantastic.
As the book opens, Jay is in the midst of a nightmare. In his nightmare, he is back on the streets - in their old squat - and Em is being kidnapped, taken from him. Jay cannot protect her (one of his biggest fears) and he just watches her being taken away. While this is happening - still in the dream - his father appears and reminds him that this is his fault, his inability to protect Em, just like he was unable to protect his mother...just like her death was his fault. He continues to talk down to Jay until Em gently awakens him and reminds him that it was all a dream, she is there, everything is okay.
Back up a second: While Jay is dreaming, Em awakens safely in their "new" home. No longer on the streets, she feels a relative sense of safety although the memories of the recent past are still haunting her as well. Em has nightmares, too, and she's also suffering from some additional issues from her past. As she realizes that Jay is having another of his nightmares, her heart breaks - he protected her for so long while on the streets, she longs to be able to protect him from whatever it is that is inside of his head and it pains her to watch and hear him struggle so.
Just because Jay and Em are now free from the dangers of the streets does not mean they are free from their memories...
Since neither of them have finished high school, they basically had to take whatever jobs they could get - the jobs they found happen to be at a gritty bar/restaurant not too far from their house. They both work there, but often they work differing hours. This is okay, though, because they're on their own and they're making it...sort of. Jay doesn't tell Em how hard they're struggling financially. They pool their money and they work all of the shifts that they can, but life is still really tough when you're young and trying to make it without a high school diploma or education beyond that. Still, they're young, they're in love, and they're safe now. Despite the stresses of this new life, it's NOTHING compared to the life they used to have, and they are grateful for the comforts of their home - a shower, a roof over their heads, food, a bed...basically everything. Before they had pretty much nothing.
At work, they have a few friends. Em has found a genuine, true friend in co-worker Ash - Ash knows the secret of where Em and Jay came from and doesn't judge them for it. She keeps their secret and listens when Em needs to talk. She is great and Em feels like for he first time, she knows what it is like to experience true friendship. Jay isn't quite as trusting at this point, but he appreciates that Em has Ash because he wants good things for her. He doesn't quite appreciate Mason, however. Mason is another co-worker - and it seems like he and Em have a friendly banter about them that seems to grate on Jay's nerves.
It could be that Jay is jealous - Jay works so hard and is usually so busy that he isn't even able to step away from the bar to say a word or two to Em during their shifts (whereas the wait staff are able to say a few words to one another in the kitchen and in passing) OR it could just be his protective nature. Either way, Jay keeps a watchful eye on this Mason dude...
(Remember, Jay has a protectful nature about him and is one of the good guys.)
In Fight or Flight, we read a great deal about Em's past, but we were only given glimpses into Jay's past. Now or Never gives us much more in the way of what Jay has had to deal with in the past, and the past literally shows back up on his doorstep. Not only does it stop Jay right in his steps and catch his breath, but Jay's past has a way of controlling him and manipulating him that he doesn't want Em involved in. So there are some issues there that Jay thought he was rid of that have come back. Jay has to find a way to ONCE AGAIN rid himself of these nasty beasts that threaten his sanity and his well-being - doing this means he has to keep Em absolutely 100% safe from his dreaded and awful past. Doing this may mean that Jay has to make some very tough decisions about "Jay + Em" which could either work out for the better or the worst. The question is...which? Em has been hurt before and Jay is her safe place. So will she trust Jay - actually listen to him - and trust him to know what is best for her? Or will she just get angry and push him away because she is hurt once again? Will Em stop loving this guy that has saved her life?
These questions and the dramatic events that surround them kept me ON THE EDGE OF MY SEAT because I love Jay and Em so much at this point and I sincerely only want what is best for them.
I absolutely love this series - if you couldn't tell by following this blog. The stories - all three of them - have been SO COMPELLING to me, and they've been so fantastic and so well-written. AND they've kept me glued to my Kindle, doing the white-knuckled click-faster, CLICK-FASTER! thing that I do when I'm really wrapped up in a story. You guys, I really love that - getting wrapped up on a story so deeply. I care so much about Jay and Em (and about Allie and Dean from Sink or Swim) and I want nothing but great things for them all.
I knew right away from the first book that Jay had that protective instinct about him, and this has followed him into this second book. He is still quite the protector - his first thought is always about Em and her well-being. When trouble shows up on his doorstep, Em is there to see it - so she is vaguely aware that something is going on - but she isn't aware to what degree Jay is being harassed and manipulated. And Jay being the protector that he is, he intends to keep it that way. Just like with the bills that keep coming and the debt that stresses him so - he doesn't really want her to know these issues. While I absolutely love this instinct about Jay, there are times when it also becomes a little of a weakness for him - a flaw, perhaps - and I love that too. He loves her so much that he is willing to risk so much for her, and he suffers for it. Not the smartest move, but HEY in love, we all don't make the smartest decisions, do we?
Jay is a remarkable character - completely caring and understanding of the issues that Em still is facing (and she has plenty). He never pushes her beyond what she can handle and he encourages her at every opportunity. He appreciates all of the help that she provides him in the caring-for of their home (which is really great, given their young age) and I just think that given their completely unusual and not-normal start coupled with the fact that they are young and a bit naive, they do as well as can be expected. Jay does as well as can be expected. He feels guilt often about not being a better provider and he beats himself up for some things from his past, but I think that he can work beyond this with help. Jay is a great character.
And Em...bless her. It is unusual FOR ME to connect so deeply with female characters (as I am usually such a fan of male POV's and male characters) but right away in Fight or Flight, Em won my heart. It was her pure heart, her fierce desire to make it in the world, and her willingness to do anything to get to that point of making it. In this second book, Em still possesses those amazing qualities but she some added features that I love: her feelings of safety, her love and appreciation for Jay, and her willingness to do anything to help him out make her stand out to me as great. It's true that there are some things that happen in this book (to Jay) that Em doesn't really understand but she never stops loving that boy and continues to care for him and want the best for him because her love is pure and true, even when she is unsure of what is going on, when she is kind of flailing for answers.
Em is a hard worker - she has to be - and it breaks my heart a little bit when her friend Ash has to teach her how to have a good time. I don't mean "have a good time" like go out and act crazy - I mean doing things like go shopping and having a manicure, but this vulnerability and this sweetness is part of what I love about Em. And again, this appreciation for her first real, actual friend is another of the things that I love about her. Em also doesn't really know what to do about Mason - the guy coworker that clearly has a crush on her but still respects the boundary between Em and her boyfriend. This is interesting to read as the events unfold in the book. There was more than one instance in which I held my breath for a second as it relates to this and other events, but all in all, I'm proud of Em (and of Jay).
Mason and Ash, as friends to the main characters, are wonderful secondary characters that I fell in love with myself. I wouldn't mind books about these two, if I'm being completely honest - but I'm not sure where the author is going with the series.
I realize this review is getting long-winded and that's just because I love these books so much. I love that this scenario - this entire story arc, including the novella involving Allie and Dean - is plausible and is likely happening out there right now. I love the awareness to these issues that I now have while at the same time being entertained in a way that doesn't involve shock value by the author or inappropriate themes. This is just a really well-written YA/NA Contemporary series, you guys, and I want to push it on everyone that enjoys contemporary. Plus, HELLO LOOK AT THESE COVERS. So lovely.
I recommend Now or Never to fans of YA/NA Contemporary with Romance and Issues. Heck, I recommend the entire series. This book is one that is NOT a companion and DOES need to be read after Fight or Flight. Please read them in order! Despite the age of the characters (Em is seventeen), I do personally consider this to qualify as a New Adult read given the extraordinary circumstances these two are in, and HERE IS A RECOMMENDATION FOR THOSE THAT ARE LOOKING FOR GREAT NEW ADULT. I love this book. I love this series. These will be re-reads for me!
And I still want everyone to pick up these books and begin reading them. They are so fantastic.
******************************************
The first thing you need to know is this:
As the book opens, we see that Emerson and Jay can't get beyond their past - sort of. They're plagued with nightmares and memories.
As the book opens, Jay is in the midst of a nightmare. In his nightmare, he is back on the streets - in their old squat - and Em is being kidnapped, taken from him. Jay cannot protect her (one of his biggest fears) and he just watches her being taken away. While this is happening - still in the dream - his father appears and reminds him that this is his fault, his inability to protect Em, just like he was unable to protect his mother...just like her death was his fault. He continues to talk down to Jay until Em gently awakens him and reminds him that it was all a dream, she is there, everything is okay.
Back up a second: While Jay is dreaming, Em awakens safely in their "new" home. No longer on the streets, she feels a relative sense of safety although the memories of the recent past are still haunting her as well. Em has nightmares, too, and she's also suffering from some additional issues from her past. As she realizes that Jay is having another of his nightmares, her heart breaks - he protected her for so long while on the streets, she longs to be able to protect him from whatever it is that is inside of his head and it pains her to watch and hear him struggle so.
Just because Jay and Em are now free from the dangers of the streets does not mean they are free from their memories...
The second thing you need to know is this:
Jay and Em work hard to make their new life work.
THEY WORK HARD.
Since neither of them have finished high school, they basically had to take whatever jobs they could get - the jobs they found happen to be at a gritty bar/restaurant not too far from their house. They both work there, but often they work differing hours. This is okay, though, because they're on their own and they're making it...sort of. Jay doesn't tell Em how hard they're struggling financially. They pool their money and they work all of the shifts that they can, but life is still really tough when you're young and trying to make it without a high school diploma or education beyond that. Still, they're young, they're in love, and they're safe now. Despite the stresses of this new life, it's NOTHING compared to the life they used to have, and they are grateful for the comforts of their home - a shower, a roof over their heads, food, a bed...basically everything. Before they had pretty much nothing.
At work, they have a few friends. Em has found a genuine, true friend in co-worker Ash - Ash knows the secret of where Em and Jay came from and doesn't judge them for it. She keeps their secret and listens when Em needs to talk. She is great and Em feels like for he first time, she knows what it is like to experience true friendship. Jay isn't quite as trusting at this point, but he appreciates that Em has Ash because he wants good things for her. He doesn't quite appreciate Mason, however. Mason is another co-worker - and it seems like he and Em have a friendly banter about them that seems to grate on Jay's nerves.
It could be that Jay is jealous - Jay works so hard and is usually so busy that he isn't even able to step away from the bar to say a word or two to Em during their shifts (whereas the wait staff are able to say a few words to one another in the kitchen and in passing) OR it could just be his protective nature. Either way, Jay keeps a watchful eye on this Mason dude...
(Remember, Jay has a protectful nature about him and is one of the good guys.)
The third thing you need to know is this:
Jay's past comes back to haunt him in a BIG way.
In Fight or Flight, we read a great deal about Em's past, but we were only given glimpses into Jay's past. Now or Never gives us much more in the way of what Jay has had to deal with in the past, and the past literally shows back up on his doorstep. Not only does it stop Jay right in his steps and catch his breath, but Jay's past has a way of controlling him and manipulating him that he doesn't want Em involved in. So there are some issues there that Jay thought he was rid of that have come back. Jay has to find a way to ONCE AGAIN rid himself of these nasty beasts that threaten his sanity and his well-being - doing this means he has to keep Em absolutely 100% safe from his dreaded and awful past. Doing this may mean that Jay has to make some very tough decisions about "Jay + Em" which could either work out for the better or the worst. The question is...which? Em has been hurt before and Jay is her safe place. So will she trust Jay - actually listen to him - and trust him to know what is best for her? Or will she just get angry and push him away because she is hurt once again? Will Em stop loving this guy that has saved her life?
These questions and the dramatic events that surround them kept me ON THE EDGE OF MY SEAT because I love Jay and Em so much at this point and I sincerely only want what is best for them.
******************************************
I absolutely love this series - if you couldn't tell by following this blog. The stories - all three of them - have been SO COMPELLING to me, and they've been so fantastic and so well-written. AND they've kept me glued to my Kindle, doing the white-knuckled click-faster, CLICK-FASTER! thing that I do when I'm really wrapped up in a story. You guys, I really love that - getting wrapped up on a story so deeply. I care so much about Jay and Em (and about Allie and Dean from Sink or Swim) and I want nothing but great things for them all.
I knew right away from the first book that Jay had that protective instinct about him, and this has followed him into this second book. He is still quite the protector - his first thought is always about Em and her well-being. When trouble shows up on his doorstep, Em is there to see it - so she is vaguely aware that something is going on - but she isn't aware to what degree Jay is being harassed and manipulated. And Jay being the protector that he is, he intends to keep it that way. Just like with the bills that keep coming and the debt that stresses him so - he doesn't really want her to know these issues. While I absolutely love this instinct about Jay, there are times when it also becomes a little of a weakness for him - a flaw, perhaps - and I love that too. He loves her so much that he is willing to risk so much for her, and he suffers for it. Not the smartest move, but HEY in love, we all don't make the smartest decisions, do we?
Jay is a remarkable character - completely caring and understanding of the issues that Em still is facing (and she has plenty). He never pushes her beyond what she can handle and he encourages her at every opportunity. He appreciates all of the help that she provides him in the caring-for of their home (which is really great, given their young age) and I just think that given their completely unusual and not-normal start coupled with the fact that they are young and a bit naive, they do as well as can be expected. Jay does as well as can be expected. He feels guilt often about not being a better provider and he beats himself up for some things from his past, but I think that he can work beyond this with help. Jay is a great character.
And Em...bless her. It is unusual FOR ME to connect so deeply with female characters (as I am usually such a fan of male POV's and male characters) but right away in Fight or Flight, Em won my heart. It was her pure heart, her fierce desire to make it in the world, and her willingness to do anything to get to that point of making it. In this second book, Em still possesses those amazing qualities but she some added features that I love: her feelings of safety, her love and appreciation for Jay, and her willingness to do anything to help him out make her stand out to me as great. It's true that there are some things that happen in this book (to Jay) that Em doesn't really understand but she never stops loving that boy and continues to care for him and want the best for him because her love is pure and true, even when she is unsure of what is going on, when she is kind of flailing for answers.
Em is a hard worker - she has to be - and it breaks my heart a little bit when her friend Ash has to teach her how to have a good time. I don't mean "have a good time" like go out and act crazy - I mean doing things like go shopping and having a manicure, but this vulnerability and this sweetness is part of what I love about Em. And again, this appreciation for her first real, actual friend is another of the things that I love about her. Em also doesn't really know what to do about Mason - the guy coworker that clearly has a crush on her but still respects the boundary between Em and her boyfriend. This is interesting to read as the events unfold in the book. There was more than one instance in which I held my breath for a second as it relates to this and other events, but all in all, I'm proud of Em (and of Jay).
Mason and Ash, as friends to the main characters, are wonderful secondary characters that I fell in love with myself. I wouldn't mind books about these two, if I'm being completely honest - but I'm not sure where the author is going with the series.
I realize this review is getting long-winded and that's just because I love these books so much. I love that this scenario - this entire story arc, including the novella involving Allie and Dean - is plausible and is likely happening out there right now. I love the awareness to these issues that I now have while at the same time being entertained in a way that doesn't involve shock value by the author or inappropriate themes. This is just a really well-written YA/NA Contemporary series, you guys, and I want to push it on everyone that enjoys contemporary. Plus, HELLO LOOK AT THESE COVERS. So lovely.
I recommend Now or Never to fans of YA/NA Contemporary with Romance and Issues. Heck, I recommend the entire series. This book is one that is NOT a companion and DOES need to be read after Fight or Flight. Please read them in order! Despite the age of the characters (Em is seventeen), I do personally consider this to qualify as a New Adult read given the extraordinary circumstances these two are in, and HERE IS A RECOMMENDATION FOR THOSE THAT ARE LOOKING FOR GREAT NEW ADULT. I love this book. I love this series. These will be re-reads for me!
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March 25, 2021No! Em, no!
Pain radiated from his chest, his head, his gut. Hell, the pain was everywhere, but nothing hurt as badly as the sight of that son of a bitch hauling Em from the room, while he laid there, powerless to stop it.
No. He wasn’t powerless. Not anymore. He’d never be powerless again. He promised himself that two years ago when he’d walked out of that house, and he couldn’t afford to be now. Not when the girl he loved was in trouble. Not when she was so frightened her entire body was visibly shaking and yet she still threw herself on her uncle’s mercy to protect him.
That wasn’t how this was supposed to work. He was supposed to protect her. Keep her safe. Ignoring stabbing pains so acute that they sent white hot light lancing through his skull, Jay dragged himself up off the floor. His legs didn’t want to cooperate and he stumbled sideways into the wall. Too long. This was taking too damn long. He had to catch her. He had to stop her. He had to.
“Em.” His harsh voice rasped through the vacant stairwell as he lowered himself precariously toward the first floor of the crack house he’d been stupid enough to bring Em into, but no one was there to hear him. “Em!”
Time seemed to come in flashes, like the whole world rotating under a strobe light. Jay shuffled down the hall toward the front door, tripping over unconscious and prone bodies along the way. He wanted to scream at them. Tell them to get the hell out of his way, to get up, to do something, to help him. But he couldn’t do any of that. Staying upright was taking all of his concentration and continuing forward one step at a time was demanding more than he was sure he had. Still, he kept going.
Jay shoved outside just in time to see that asshole push Em into the passenger side of a dark blue four door sedan. The street lamp was out so he couldn’t see her face in the shadows, but he heard her sob as the door slammed shut.
“Wait! Em!” Jay lurched down the steps, no longer giving a damn about the dizzying sensation threatening to ground him. “No!”
Feet flying across the small unkempt lot, he hit the sidewalk just as the sedan peeled away from the curb.
Jay tore down the sidewalk after it, feet thumping against the pavement so hard it seemed to rattle his brain. “No. No! Em, no. Please. No.”
As the taillights rounded the corner at the end of the block, the world tilted on its axis. All around him, his surroundings spun into a wild blur of color and nausea inducing pain. Jay barely registered the slap of the pavement against his cheek before everything went dark . . .
***
“Useless. That girl comes out here and you take her in. Tell her you’ll keep her safe. Take care of her.” The familiar mocking of his father’s voice rang loud and clear, and seared Jay to the bone. “What did you think? Doin’ all that. Taking care of that girl would somehow make up for your mother? Stupid boy. You’re the reason she’s dead and no amount of repentance can make up for that. You’re headed straight to hell, boy. And a girl like that? She don’t belong in hell with the likes of you.”
“Em . . .” Jay’s voice was little more than a muffled groan.
“Couldn’t even do that right, though, could you? Never could take care of no one. She’s better off without you.”
“No.” He was wrong. “Em.”
“She don’t need you.”
“Em.” Even if that was true. Even if she didn’t need him. He needed her. “Em.”
Pain radiated from his chest, his head, his gut. Hell, the pain was everywhere, but nothing hurt as badly as the sight of that son of a bitch hauling Em from the room, while he laid there, powerless to stop it.
No. He wasn’t powerless. Not anymore. He’d never be powerless again. He promised himself that two years ago when he’d walked out of that house, and he couldn’t afford to be now. Not when the girl he loved was in trouble. Not when she was so frightened her entire body was visibly shaking and yet she still threw herself on her uncle’s mercy to protect him.
That wasn’t how this was supposed to work. He was supposed to protect her. Keep her safe. Ignoring stabbing pains so acute that they sent white hot light lancing through his skull, Jay dragged himself up off the floor. His legs didn’t want to cooperate and he stumbled sideways into the wall. Too long. This was taking too damn long. He had to catch her. He had to stop her. He had to.
“Em.” His harsh voice rasped through the vacant stairwell as he lowered himself precariously toward the first floor of the crack house he’d been stupid enough to bring Em into, but no one was there to hear him. “Em!”
Time seemed to come in flashes, like the whole world rotating under a strobe light. Jay shuffled down the hall toward the front door, tripping over unconscious and prone bodies along the way. He wanted to scream at them. Tell them to get the hell out of his way, to get up, to do something, to help him. But he couldn’t do any of that. Staying upright was taking all of his concentration and continuing forward one step at a time was demanding more than he was sure he had. Still, he kept going.
Jay shoved outside just in time to see that asshole push Em into the passenger side of a dark blue four door sedan. The street lamp was out so he couldn’t see her face in the shadows, but he heard her sob as the door slammed shut.
“Wait! Em!” Jay lurched down the steps, no longer giving a damn about the dizzying sensation threatening to ground him. “No!”
Feet flying across the small unkempt lot, he hit the sidewalk just as the sedan peeled away from the curb.
Jay tore down the sidewalk after it, feet thumping against the pavement so hard it seemed to rattle his brain. “No. No! Em, no. Please. No.”
As the taillights rounded the corner at the end of the block, the world tilted on its axis. All around him, his surroundings spun into a wild blur of color and nausea inducing pain. Jay barely registered the slap of the pavement against his cheek before everything went dark . . .
***
“Useless. That girl comes out here and you take her in. Tell her you’ll keep her safe. Take care of her.” The familiar mocking of his father’s voice rang loud and clear, and seared Jay to the bone. “What did you think? Doin’ all that. Taking care of that girl would somehow make up for your mother? Stupid boy. You’re the reason she’s dead and no amount of repentance can make up for that. You’re headed straight to hell, boy. And a girl like that? She don’t belong in hell with the likes of you.”
“Em . . .” Jay’s voice was little more than a muffled groan.
“Couldn’t even do that right, though, could you? Never could take care of no one. She’s better off without you.”
“No.” He was wrong. “Em.”
“She don’t need you.”
“Em.” Even if that was true. Even if she didn’t need him. He needed her. “Em.”
November 5, 2013
4 star review by Jen Hagen
Jay and Em deserve a happily ever after. They found strength in each other on the streets and thought they had found their happily ever after when Jay came upon an inheritance and was able to purchase a small home and a rickety old pick-up truck. They were living the American Dream. Even though they have a roof over their heads and jobs, it’s still difficult to make ends meet.
Everything had seemed so bright, shiny, and new the day he’d swooped in to Em’s rescue and taken her away. A new beginning full of promise. They’d been so naïve. Without high school diplomas or any sort of references, they’d been turned down right and left until the last of his inheritance was spent trying to keep them fed.
Both Em and Jay suffer from nightmares depicting images of their past lives that they escaped. Jay continues to be a protector of Em. I don’t think either of them would survive in this life if Jay didn’t see himself as a protector and Em didn’t have him to look after her. They are a perfect fit for each other.
The past comes knocking on Jay’s door and this sets in motion the precedence of the story. Jay thinks that he has to give Em protection from him and his past and the only way to do this is if Em isn’t in his life. It hurts him, but he has to let her go.
“I took you in when you had no one. Before me, you had no one. And no one since. Don’t you see? You have nothing to compare me to. No idea of what else is out there. What you’re missing. What you deserve. Things are different now. You’re safe now.”
For being only 19, Jay has had a lifetime of worries. This new worry has him working double and triple shifts at the diner, but still not able to make the past disappear. He sees Em practically every day at the diner that they both work at and he sees that she has been beat down by his choice to let her go. He has essentially pushed her into the arms of another man and it hurts him to see her moving on, but in his eyes it was the only thing to do as he is a protector and he will protect Em at any cost…even if it costs him his happiness.
Em has difficulties moving forward in her life. She has a setback in her progression from the past and feels guilty for not doing anything to prevent hurt being transferred onto others. She falls into her own world of blackness and needs help finding her way into the brightness of the world again, but without Jay beside her she sinks further down.
Missing Jay was like missing a body part. Something essential, like an arm or a leg. Functioning without him was difficult and awkward.
Both Jay and Em are being haunted by their pasts and we struggle to see them move forward. Jay tries so hard to keep his past away from Em, but even with pushing her away it still manages to find her. Jay is at a standstill as to how to move forward in life without his past constantly showing up at his door.
He’d done everything he could think of, given up everything he had – including the one thing he loved more than anything else in the godforsaken world: her—and still it wasn’t enough. What the hell did this life want from him? He had nothing left to give.
Em knows that her past has kept her and Jay’s relationship from moving forward sexually. When Jay essentially pushes Em away from him she rationalizes that it is because of her fear to let go of the painful past. She needs strength and she needs courage to make certain that her uncle faces charges for Em’s violations. Em needs Jay beside her to be strong.
“We’re not strong enough alone. And that’s okay, because we’re not alone. I have you, and you have me, and nothing is going to change that. Apart, we’re like broken mirrors, reflecting back these warped and skewed images of ourselves.” -- Em
I have enjoyed reading Em and Jay’s journey taking them from the gruesome memories of their pasts, to the streets, and finally to a place they can call home together.
Jay and Em deserve a happily ever after. They found strength in each other on the streets and thought they had found their happily ever after when Jay came upon an inheritance and was able to purchase a small home and a rickety old pick-up truck. They were living the American Dream. Even though they have a roof over their heads and jobs, it’s still difficult to make ends meet.
Everything had seemed so bright, shiny, and new the day he’d swooped in to Em’s rescue and taken her away. A new beginning full of promise. They’d been so naïve. Without high school diplomas or any sort of references, they’d been turned down right and left until the last of his inheritance was spent trying to keep them fed.
Both Em and Jay suffer from nightmares depicting images of their past lives that they escaped. Jay continues to be a protector of Em. I don’t think either of them would survive in this life if Jay didn’t see himself as a protector and Em didn’t have him to look after her. They are a perfect fit for each other.
The past comes knocking on Jay’s door and this sets in motion the precedence of the story. Jay thinks that he has to give Em protection from him and his past and the only way to do this is if Em isn’t in his life. It hurts him, but he has to let her go.
“I took you in when you had no one. Before me, you had no one. And no one since. Don’t you see? You have nothing to compare me to. No idea of what else is out there. What you’re missing. What you deserve. Things are different now. You’re safe now.”
For being only 19, Jay has had a lifetime of worries. This new worry has him working double and triple shifts at the diner, but still not able to make the past disappear. He sees Em practically every day at the diner that they both work at and he sees that she has been beat down by his choice to let her go. He has essentially pushed her into the arms of another man and it hurts him to see her moving on, but in his eyes it was the only thing to do as he is a protector and he will protect Em at any cost…even if it costs him his happiness.
Em has difficulties moving forward in her life. She has a setback in her progression from the past and feels guilty for not doing anything to prevent hurt being transferred onto others. She falls into her own world of blackness and needs help finding her way into the brightness of the world again, but without Jay beside her she sinks further down.
Missing Jay was like missing a body part. Something essential, like an arm or a leg. Functioning without him was difficult and awkward.
Both Jay and Em are being haunted by their pasts and we struggle to see them move forward. Jay tries so hard to keep his past away from Em, but even with pushing her away it still manages to find her. Jay is at a standstill as to how to move forward in life without his past constantly showing up at his door.
He’d done everything he could think of, given up everything he had – including the one thing he loved more than anything else in the godforsaken world: her—and still it wasn’t enough. What the hell did this life want from him? He had nothing left to give.
Em knows that her past has kept her and Jay’s relationship from moving forward sexually. When Jay essentially pushes Em away from him she rationalizes that it is because of her fear to let go of the painful past. She needs strength and she needs courage to make certain that her uncle faces charges for Em’s violations. Em needs Jay beside her to be strong.
“We’re not strong enough alone. And that’s okay, because we’re not alone. I have you, and you have me, and nothing is going to change that. Apart, we’re like broken mirrors, reflecting back these warped and skewed images of ourselves.” -- Em
I have enjoyed reading Em and Jay’s journey taking them from the gruesome memories of their pasts, to the streets, and finally to a place they can call home together.
November 24, 2013
Review will be posted 11/4/13 as part of the blog Tour.
You always hurt the ones you love. Even if you’re trying to protect them, or maybe because you try to protect them. But no matter what, you’re stronger when you do things together, stand together.
Jay and Em’s story continues in Now or Never. It’s a heart-wrenching, gut wrenching emotional roller coaster. Jay and Em don’t seem to be able to catch a break. No matter what they do, life keeps throwing things at them. They fight, they try, they can’t get ahead. Then Jay’s past and Em’s past catch up to them. It threatens everything.
This is definitely not your typical romance. Jay and Em have issues and problems most people could never imagine in a million years. They’re fighting so hard. As I was reading this story I wanted to hit Jay so many times. He’s a typical male in that he wants to protect Em. But his problems are not typical. His methods were not typical. He just ended up hurting Em over and over.
Em, bless her heart, tried. She kept loving Jay. She tried to get him to listen, but he just pushed her away and fed into her fears. I was so proud when she finally took a stand and made Jay realize what they had to do. It was amazing.
Hopefully Jay and Em will have their HEA now. But you never know as life has a way of keeping you on your toes and throwing curve balls.
I received a copy of this book from the author in exchange for an honest review.
You always hurt the ones you love. Even if you’re trying to protect them, or maybe because you try to protect them. But no matter what, you’re stronger when you do things together, stand together.
Jay and Em’s story continues in Now or Never. It’s a heart-wrenching, gut wrenching emotional roller coaster. Jay and Em don’t seem to be able to catch a break. No matter what they do, life keeps throwing things at them. They fight, they try, they can’t get ahead. Then Jay’s past and Em’s past catch up to them. It threatens everything.
This is definitely not your typical romance. Jay and Em have issues and problems most people could never imagine in a million years. They’re fighting so hard. As I was reading this story I wanted to hit Jay so many times. He’s a typical male in that he wants to protect Em. But his problems are not typical. His methods were not typical. He just ended up hurting Em over and over.
Em, bless her heart, tried. She kept loving Jay. She tried to get him to listen, but he just pushed her away and fed into her fears. I was so proud when she finally took a stand and made Jay realize what they had to do. It was amazing.
Hopefully Jay and Em will have their HEA now. But you never know as life has a way of keeping you on your toes and throwing curve balls.
I received a copy of this book from the author in exchange for an honest review.
November 6, 2013
I received this book free from the author in exchange for an honest review.
I enjoyed this book, it was gripping and easy to devour but I didn't enjoy it as much as Fight or Flight because I didn't find the situations as intense. I wanted more of Jay's story, I didn't really get where his dad came from and how he found them and I don't really know what he actually wanted, well besides money. I am glad the story ended the way it did because Jay and Em finally got to be happy. But I still want more! I want, no I NEED to know what happens now. Do the villains finally go to jail? And if yes do they stay there. And do Jay and Em get their happy ending forever?
I'm still in love withe Jay and Em but it I am sad that they keep blaming themselves for hints that they have no control over. I'm glad that they are getting their lives together and coming into their own. I love that they are able to grow and overcome their issues together and have each other for support. I also really like amazon and Ashlyn and I can't wait to get their stories.
This was another awesome book by Jamie Canosa and I can't wait to read more. This story tugged on my heart strings and I want more! I would recommend this novel to those who love a good romantic contemporary.
I enjoyed this book, it was gripping and easy to devour but I didn't enjoy it as much as Fight or Flight because I didn't find the situations as intense. I wanted more of Jay's story, I didn't really get where his dad came from and how he found them and I don't really know what he actually wanted, well besides money. I am glad the story ended the way it did because Jay and Em finally got to be happy. But I still want more! I want, no I NEED to know what happens now. Do the villains finally go to jail? And if yes do they stay there. And do Jay and Em get their happy ending forever?
I'm still in love withe Jay and Em but it I am sad that they keep blaming themselves for hints that they have no control over. I'm glad that they are getting their lives together and coming into their own. I love that they are able to grow and overcome their issues together and have each other for support. I also really like amazon and Ashlyn and I can't wait to get their stories.
This was another awesome book by Jamie Canosa and I can't wait to read more. This story tugged on my heart strings and I want more! I would recommend this novel to those who love a good romantic contemporary.
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February 14, 2015I made it about 4 chapters. I just couldn't get into this book. I imagine it would have been another perfectly fine 3 star read for me, but if I'm not excited to read a book I no longer bother with it.
October 22, 2013
I didn't find this instalment as entertaining or as gripping as the first book but I enjoyed it.
November 4, 2013
I nice conclusion, but I would have loved an epilogue, but maybe we'll get glimpses in Win or Lose.
October 21, 2013
Will post my review soon.
December 3, 2014
Is there going to be a 3? Please let there be a 3? I want marriage and babies and stuff. Unicorns and rainbows!! Yay! They deserve it!!
July 12, 2015
Its a good story and it ends all the questions you have from the first book. Love overcomes your thoughts of yourself.
February 26, 2016
Amazing!!!!
Ok!!! This series is amazingly good. I loved the drama of this book. It was really to see that things do eore
Ok!!! This series is amazingly good. I loved the drama of this book. It was really to see that things do eore
Displaying 1 - 17 of 17 reviews