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Every Last Cuckoo

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Sarah Lucas imagined the rest of her days would be spent living peacefully in her rural Vermont home in the steadfast company of her husband. But now, with Charles's sudden passing, seventy-five-year-old Sarah is left inconsolably alone. As grief settles in, Sarah's mind lingers on her her imperfect but devoted fifty-year marriage to Charles; the years they spent raising their three very different children; and her childhood during the Great Depression, when her parents opened their home to countless relatives and neighbors. So, when a variety of wayward souls come seeking shelter in Sarah's own big, empty home, her past comes full circle. As this unruly flock forms a family of sorts, they—with Sarah—nurture and protect one another, all the while discovering their unsuspected strengths and courage. In the tradition of Jane Smiley and Sue Miller, Kate Maloy has crafted a wise and gratifying novel about a woman who gracefully accepts a surprising new role just when she though her best years were behind her.

294 pages, Kindle Edition

First published January 22, 2008

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About the author

Kate Maloy

6 books20 followers
Kate Maloy is the author of the memoir A Stone Bridge North: Reflections in a New Life. Her work has been published by LiteraryMama.com, VerbSap.com, and the Readerville Journal. She has forthcoming pieces in the Kenyon Review and two anthologies: For Keeps and Choice. She lives with her husband on the central coast of Oregon.

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Displaying 1 - 30 of 432 reviews
Profile Image for Carol.
860 reviews560 followers
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March 21, 2016
Fiction debut, not perfect, but with potential

The Hook 2016 Reading Plan – bookWomen, Vol.16, No.2, Dec.2011-Jan.2012 Pg.4, Recommendation of Josephine Schiff.
The appeal was the promise of woman in her seventies finding a new life after the death of her husband.

The Line ”Her memories were beads jumbled loose in a box, unstrung.” pg.6


The SinkerEvery Last Cuckoo won the American Library Association Reading List Award for Best Adult Genre (Women’s) Fiction.

Seventy-five year old Sarah Lucas, finds her life at odds after the death of her husband, Charles. As you’d expect, Sarah misses Charles, finding her home quiet and empty, even with her two beloved dogs to keep her company. As times moves slowly by, Sarah finds new interests, one of which involves taking photos on her daily walk. She begins to face her fears, mend fences with her children and forge a new life. How she chooses to do this is the crust of the story.

As an older woman in a long marriage, I like that Kate Maloy attempted to give voice to the intimacy of a senior marriage. What’s is important here is not so much the words used as the idea that sex and love are not just reserved for the young.

Maloy keeps her character quite busy throughout and some events seem a bit overdone but to keep this in balance, there was also some lovely writing and passages.

I am sorry to see that Kate Maloy has not written any fiction beyond this debut.

Alguonquin Books of Chapel Hill, 2009, Paperback Edition, includes reading guide, 283p.









Profile Image for Furrawn.
649 reviews57 followers
July 20, 2022
Powerful and Lyrical.

Halfway through this book, I paused my reading to google the author Kate Maloy. What else had she written? I found this book to be the only work of fiction by her. There are two non-fiction works. In despair, I went to Kate Maloy’s author website. She mentioned writing other works of fiction but was told they were “too quiet” to be published. Balderdash. Whoever told her that is an absolute moron or doesn’t comprehend that a book can be staggeringly quiet and change the world.

Thoreau was quiet.

EVERY LAST CUCKOO is phenomenal. It’s beautiful. I felt like I was with Sarah every step of the way. I felt her every emotion and thought each of her thoughts.

The landscape, people, garden, religion, pets, and just everything was seamless. A melody carved into words on a page.

Sarah is such a lovely honest character. Kate Maloy mentions having a coldness when she wrote the book. I think perhaps it is because she poured everything into Sarah.

I cannot say enough good things about this book. What I can say is that I am heartbroken to find that there are no other books of fiction by her for me to read.

This book delves into loss, growth, aging, change, love, friendship, family, anger, depression, hope, and so much more. Yet, it’s always calm and believable. Never contrived. The characters are so full of life.

Really. A stellar book.
Profile Image for Yolanda.
553 reviews50 followers
July 1, 2010
I loved this book.Thanks so much Relyn for recommending it.
This book drew me in for the start and kept me interested. It really spoke to my heart at where I am in my life right now.
I think that I very closely identified with Sarah the main character in that I am finally at 46 comfortable in my own skin and at a point where I am not obcessed with being wealthy,keeping up with the Jones or having the perfect house. I am content to just enjoy life and each day that comes.

I think that this books speaks to that so well and the fact that contrary to popular belief life doesn't end at middle age.
I throughly enjoyed her descriptions of love at middle age and the winter of life.
I think this is just a wonderful book on so many levels and I feel that anyone who readsit will come away rewarded.
I also like the fact the author is from Oregon.
Profile Image for Justin.
124 reviews24 followers
January 18, 2008
In an American fictional tradition that rarely addresses the elderly on any significant level, Oregon writer Kate Maloy's debut novel stands out with a 75-year-old woman as its centerpiece.

In Every Last Cuckoo, Sarah Lucas lives a peaceful, pleasant life with her naturalist husband Charles in rural Vermont. They spend their twilight years puttering around the surrounding woods and eating meals with family and friends. In these opening chapters, Maloy skillfully layers details of the couple's history and social sphere. We learn about their son David's tumultuous past and glean the ups and downs of their decades-long marriage. Maloy does a marvelous job depicting the kind of tender, steady domestic partnership that is the reward of a lifetime of shared experiences, both good and bad. When Sarah and Charles are alone, she writes in typically spare and unassuming prose, “The silence between them was as familiar as their faces, their bodies, and the synchronized rhythm of their days.”

When Charles' unexpected death arrives halfway through we are appropriately surprised. Like Sarah herself, we can't imagine her life without him. The second half of Cuckoo observes as she tries to pick up the pieces of her shattered existence, first by allowing her granddaughter and two of her friends to move into her house for the summer. Here, Maloy’s book begins to falter a bit, as the notion of packing three high-school students into a senior widow’s residence seems ludicrous. Fortunately for Sarah, these teenagers wind up being the perfect houseguests, doing chores at every opportunity. For the reader, however, their angelic vitality and curious void of adolescent surliness feels implausible.

Maloy brings other characters to live with Sarah as well. An Israeli professor named Mordecai comes to live in her cabin, teaching her meditation in the process. A young mother whose own husband is dying arrives with her four-year-old son in tow; she fills Sarah's garden with luscious vegetables and cooks the household delicious food. We are meant to see Sarah finding new purpose in the harboring of these colorful characters, but as each new resident proves to be more agreeable than the last, the dramatic tension dribbles out of Cuckoo like a balloon leaking air. I wanted to see Sarah struggling more with her husband's death, to have a more difficult adjustment period to the odd assortment of strangers suddenly filling her house, and to reflect more deeply on her own fears regarding death and aging. Yet despite its rather lethargic finish, Every Last Cuckoo is mostly a riveting read. Its tenderly wrought portrayal of elderly life has an unexpectedly powerful effect, revealing fictional possibilities we'd either forgotten about or never considered at all.
73 reviews14 followers
June 24, 2010

As I sit here to write my review about Every Last Cuckoo, I have one question. How did this book manage to sit on my shelf for so long? Look at how gorgeous the cover is. Based on the cover alone, I should have pulled it off my shelf months ago. It probably sat on my shelf for about 7 months. Which I suppose is not that long. I own books that have been sitting for years unmoved. Unbelievable I know.

When you look at the cover what does it say to you. Home, comfort, a little eclectic. It almost reminds me of walking into an Anthropologie store. Not neat and organized like Crate and Barrel but fun and whimsical.

I read Every Last Cuckoo in May and really wanted to post my review for Mother's Day. The story line is beautiful. From the beginning of the book I was pulled into Sarah's life. This is not a story about mother's and the relationship they share with their daughters. It is a story about Sarah a widowed seventy-five year old grandmother, her life and her family. I loved the family scenes that were described in the book. Perhaps because author Malloy describes the family scenes that I have always wanted to be part of it, but never will. A large family gathered around the table. Evenings spent sitting around the fireplace with relatives and friends coming and going.

What I truly enjoyed about Maloy's writing and her book, is her ability to describe the characters and the scenes both so that I could envision them and I wanted to be part of the scene. Sarah lives on a plot of land adjacent to a forest in Vermont. A large part of the book, occurs during the Vermont winter. I have no desire to visit Vermont in the winter, I grew up in the snow. Maloy's writing about the walks Sarah and Charles her late husband took through the snow had me wishing I was outside trudging along in the snow.

"At last a late January thaw broke the hold of the bitterest winter. The temperature climbed almost sixty degrees on that first morning, from twenty-five below overnight to freezing by noon. Thirty felt tropical, and Charles went out hatless in the sun, grinning at Sarah as if the two of them had not spent those past weeks as edgy as two knives in a drawer. The dogs followed as Charles set off on a short walk into the woods. They leapt and ran in the the sun and grinner like Charles, like Sarah as she answered his eagerness with her own".

While the sun is high in the sky until the late evening hours, grab yourself a cup of tea, stretch out on a lawn chair and make yourself cozy to truly enjoy this book.
Profile Image for Relyn.
4,054 reviews72 followers
June 26, 2009
Oh. I liked this book. I really, really liked this book. I marked it five stars, but you know how picky I try to be with my five stars. This one is a four and a half star by my record keeping. Anyway.

I read about this book on Elizabeth Berg's blog. She discovered it and really enjoyed it. Me, too. It took my breath away, actually. Jeffrey asked me what it was about and I had a hard time answering. I finally said something like this: It's about a long, long marriage. About widowhood. About life changes. About old age. About women and friendships. About helping other people. About grieving. About the importance of family stories and of forgiveness. About the difficulty in parent-child relationships. About the loss of a child. Oh, it's just a great book.

I'd still say the same thing. The Last Cuckoo is a fantastic story, well-told, about all the things that matter. OK. About most of the things that matter.
Profile Image for Alyssa.
63 reviews
March 6, 2013
I picked this book up from off the shelf because of the colorful cover (yes, I judge that way) and because it was one of NPR's featured books in their "Chapter a Day" series.

From the first page I enjoyed Maloy's style of writing, and I loved Sarah, the main character. It was refreshing to read a story that came from the point of view of a 70-something woman...one who was going through a major shift in her life. The love between Sarah & Charles, the larger family dynamics, and the beautiful and pensive writing on the surrounding Vermont landscape captivated me and kept the pages turning.

The book is divided into two parts, which I didn't at first realize. However, the division is a nice marker between who Sarah was, and who her character becomes. The first part is a switch-off between Sarah and Charles' histories, with snippets of reminiscences, and the present day - a very tense scene which ultimately leads to Charles' death.

The second part chronicles the changes that Sarah goes through after her husband's death. She expands her thinking and viewpoints, opens her home to family and strangers, and embraces her grief. All the while, Sarah remains a very human character; she is so easy to relate to. Even though I'm 50 years younger, I found myself wishing that I could talk to her in person...sometimes even hoping that I could have some aspects of her in me when I reach that age. She also reminded me of a teacher I had, which is perhaps why I liked her so much.

Every Last Cuckoo was a compelling, quick, and satisfying read, full of warm characters and beautiful scenery.

p.s. There are two instances that grabbed my attention more intensely than the rest of the book. Both have to do with Sarah being pensive and ruminating on photos or what-have-you....and the author wrote her as "representing multitudes." Uncle Walt!! (I contain multitudes...) Even if she didn't mean to reference Whitman, these beautiful parts of the book earned brownie points with me :)
Profile Image for Gloria.
294 reviews26 followers
July 20, 2009
This was one of the more beautiful books I've read in quite awhile.

Sarah, an elderly woman who's just lost her husband, is keenly feeling her age and what she perceives as being "useless" now. But life throws at her an abundance of those who suddenly "need" her in different ways.

One of the things I loved most about this book was the fully-developed character of Sarah. And the writing was gorgeous. It didn't trivialize nor romanticize the life of an elderly woman-- rather it showed her as a "whole person," not just the age she was at now.
Through memories and flashbacks it showed me that all those feelings and thoughts that run through us (from early adulthood, to middle-age, to elder years) don't go away. Our personalities don't change.
It was just a very refreshing look at a woman who wasn't necessarily "extraordinary" in the eyes of the world-- yet was, in that she aided so many people.
And, yet, not without flaws as well.

One of those books I think you could read more than once, just to pick up on all the nuances you miss the first time.
123 reviews
March 14, 2009
I had a very hard time finishing this book. From the jacket cover, I had a very different impression of what the book would be like. I kept reading, waiting for what I was expecting to start happening to actually start happening! There was WAY too much description of the physical relationship between Sarah and Charles for me. It's one thing to explain that they still enjoyed each other at the age of 70 something and 80 something; it was another to describe it in detail! Also, I feel the author took way too much time developing Sarah and Charles' relationship and not enough time developing the rest of her interactions with the others that came into her life after Charles' death. I feel that the author had Sarah come to a realization that she couldn't change anything that was happening in anyone else's life and that she was just marking time. I feel the book just marked time from then on as well. I definitely will not be recommending this book to anyone else.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
Profile Image for Lezlee Hays.
248 reviews35 followers
March 10, 2011
I can't figure out if I just wasn't in the mood for this type of book or if it just seriously annoyed the heck out of me because it was written in such a way as to seriously annoy the heck out of me. First off, I was just bored nearly to tears until about 150 pages into the book - and I'm willing to wade through that if there's going to be some kind of pay off. But for me - there just never really was. Every time I thought I figured out where there was going to be an interesting plot line...there wasn't one. Family dysfunction painted as kinda cute is just not my thing. I wanted to send every character to therapy and make them work through some of their issues. Poor parenting. Confusing parenting. Some of the aspects of her learning to know herself again after the death of her husband were interesting because I think most women go through something similar and it's an good subject for a book - but in this one, I felt like that wasn't even explored enough. Everything felt like loose ends. Basic writing techniques where when something is mentioned - it's like if a gun is mentioned at the beginning of a book, it's got to go off at some point - I felt like there were a lot of "guns" and a lot of "bullets" but no one ever pulled the trigger. To me, it was lackadaisical writing. Carelessly lazy. But then I think - can I dislike a book so much that so many other people seem to enjoy? Am I just really NOT in the mood to read something meandering and lacking a specific determination? I don't know. But I really wasn't jazzed about it.
Profile Image for Marvin.
2,215 reviews66 followers
July 20, 2010
What a wonderful novel! There should be more novels about older people. I've read some good ones. (This one reminds me of Wallace Stegner's wonderful Crossing to Safety, with its focus on the strong relationship of an elderly couple.) Here, we're told the story of one year in the life of a 75-year-old woman who lives in rural Vermont--an amazing character--and her relationships with family & friends. She learns (or relearns) that to love is to live with loss, but chooses to love anyway (which sounds trite now that I say it here, but didn't seem that way in the book). (The way she puts it, in the book's concluding sentences is: "Sarah's grief . . . had taught her that love always brings loss. Nevertheless, love was where she would put her energies, because that was where her powers lay. There wasn't a thing she could do about loss.") A couple of passages did get a little preachy, but I liked the message, so I forgave it. Rich in the details of everyday life, yet attentive to the world of ideas and nature--just all around a sensitive, beautiful book that I'd recommend to almost anyone (except readers only looking for lots of dramatic action). And to think that I almost passed it up because the Iowa City Public Library didn't have it (but the library in Solon, Iowa--pop. 1177--did, so I was able to get it from there via interlibrary loan).
Profile Image for BookAddict.
1,192 reviews4 followers
September 17, 2009
There was a lot I liked about this book (descriptions of nature and Vermont, the tension between mothers and daughters, its feeling of community). It was very sweet, but the whole time I was reading it I kept getting annoyed at silly things and ultimately came to the conclusion that it was just too precious and predictable for me. I found it kind of cruel and unrealistic that someone should be expected to get on with their life after only 3 months upon the passing of a spouse of a gazillion years. I found it weird that parents would just let their underage kids go live with an old woman indefinitely just because they didn't get along with their parents, and the naked meditating Israeli ex-soldier was just the icing on the cake.

I like simple, sweet stories but in this case, there just weren't any characters I could relate to at all, so I think it's for that reason that this fell flat for me.

This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
Profile Image for JanB.
1,346 reviews4,358 followers
December 11, 2010
The first half of the book held promise but the second half was a hippy-dippy preachy mess. However, the cover is beautiful!
1,511 reviews4 followers
March 22, 2017
Flat and lifeless...unlike the beautiful, inviting and colorful cover. Characters never came alive for me.
Profile Image for Karen Wright.
39 reviews
September 16, 2023
This was a strong 3 1/2 stars for me. This is a story of great love and loss, and etching a new life to find a different love of life. It was a very comforting story.
Profile Image for Jen.
258 reviews13 followers
April 16, 2008
I've always loved the "and they lived happily ever after", but after having children of my own I started to look for something a little bit more. Thgere is so much of life left after the start of the "happily ever after". This book main charachter is 75 and I enjoyed her story. The prose was excellent and thought provoking, there were many passages throughout the book that were poignant in their simplicity and beautifully written. There were also passages I could have lived without, do I really need to think about the sex life of my grandmother?? And the thought of her smoking pot with her friends! AAAHHHH! Ok, now I've displayed not only agism but more prudishnish...
Profile Image for drowningmermaid.
1,003 reviews47 followers
June 19, 2009
Book club book. Other women liked it, but I thought the dialog was stilted and the characterization flat. Also, some of the language didn't work for me at all. (Spewing water "through the dam of her teeth" made me do a double-take.)

Overall, had a very Hallmark-movie-of-the-week feel to it, where nice people do nice things in a nice way. It's sort of like what I imagine the Mitford series is, only for non-religious people. Old people smoking pot and solving every problem through (unbelievable) dialog.

On the plus side, there were some very nice descriptions of love through the aging bodies of the main characters.
Profile Image for Pauline Tilbe.
99 reviews2 followers
February 24, 2013
I didn't know what to expect but the title intrigued me and the blurb sounded like something I'd like. Plus I loved the cover. I really enjoyed the characters in this book, the setting in Vermont and the descriptions made me feel like I was right there with them in the story. Sarah reveals her present and little bits of her past through the this story. Her ups and downs. I love how she came to acknowledge her faults and even how she resolved differences.
I thoroughly enjoyed this book and I'm so happy I found it!!
Profile Image for Deborah Klein.
245 reviews
October 11, 2016
The theme is an important one - the life and marriage of an elderly couple, and how one goes on w/o the other. But the story is ridiculous. All wounds are healed, all broken relationships are mended, a group of disparate people live together in magical harmony, everyone is wise. In addition, the vistas are beautiful, the homes are gorgeous, warm and welcoming, the food delicious etc. Beyond the theme, it is a tea party of a book. I would have welcomed a book dealing wth the real issues of an elderly couple and their marriage. This story will appeal to readers who prefer cozy things.
Profile Image for Autumn.
754 reviews12 followers
March 3, 2017
This book was slow paced. I found myself skipping several pages, especially during the nature scenes because they just weren't moving along. I thought the people that came into the house would be much more interesting. The end was abrupt and the book didn't really seem to be about anything.
Profile Image for Cindy Kline.
358 reviews6 followers
August 11, 2021
10 Stars, really, 10 out of 5!

This book was a beautiful bit of serendipity. All the profound imperfections of marriage, relationships with children, and survival roll easily from the author’s words to the reader. I could read this over and over, still finding nuances and facets of the folks with whom I made acquaintance in this book. The setting was beautiful. The characters were believable and multi-tonal. This book is a tapestry.
Profile Image for Chris Godwaldt.
145 reviews2 followers
June 7, 2021
The balance between life and death, the passing and utter connectedness of generations before and after, and rebirth in the midst of loss!

This is the perfect novel to explore these in an all-not-too-weighty conversation.

I devoured this book. The writing was supple, the material delightful and the characters nicely developed.

I may also be currently (and secretly) developing plans to over-winter each year in Vermont thanks the luciously described landscapes.
Profile Image for Dori Sabourin.
1,252 reviews5 followers
October 24, 2023
A New Life

Kate Maloy's “Every Last Cuckoo “ is a novel about Sarah Lucas, aged seventy-five, who loses her husband, Charles. Before she has a chance to grieve or to figure out what she is going to do with the rest of her life, she is thrust into a new life that Fate has planned for her. What could have become an empty nest becomes a life of growth both for herself and those who enter her life.
Profile Image for Lisa Walling.
34 reviews
November 30, 2024
I will be sitting with this story for awhile! Love, loss, growth, friends, family and found-family. A true inspiration on living a full life!
Profile Image for Marnie Kaplan.
45 reviews14 followers
September 30, 2017
I loved this book. It inspired me, made me realize it’s never too late to try new things, to discover a new part of yourself, to set out to create a larger family. Who would have thought a book about a 75 year old widow would be so engaging, informative and compelling? I guess the truth is we don't have to read about people who are like us. We learn the most from stepping inside the mindset of those who are different from us.

Seventy-five year old Sarah Lucas is in mourning over the love of her life, her husband Charles. They lived a wonderful life together and Sarah suddenly faces each new day with dread, as she is without the biggest constant in her life. Now, as I reconsider this novel, I think of the 80 year old Jewish grandmother of a friend I met this summer. She talked repeatedly of her beloved husband, who died a number of years ago, a chemist, "but brilliant, he could have been a lawyer." This woman was smart enough to go to college but girls didn't go to college then (unless they had wealthy parents), and she still regrets this fact. She didn't work and it is obvious that she always defined herself in terms of her wonderful husband. I suppose similar things could be said of Sarah, whose husband was a beloved doctor.

Sarah, is suddenly able to find a new version of herself, defined only by her actions. Her memories take her back to the Great Depression when her parents opened their house to various relatives in need. The married wife of a doctor never imagined doing something similar but the widow who replaces her soon packs her house full. With her teenage granddaughter, fighting for independence from the mother who doesn't understand her, two of her teenage friends -one whose mother seems happy to lose a mouth to feed, an Israeli pacifist professor writing a book in Sarah's cabin, and a young mother and child whose husband and father (and breadwinner) lies in the hospital burned from the electrical fire that ruined their small trailer. In Sarah's house a new family forms, and Sarah discovers her inner artist. Young, old and middle-aged mingle in the house finding ways to help each other overcome a series of hardships. Movie nights are created, a sullen teenager crafts stories for the young fatherless boy. Sarah and the Israeli widower ruminate on loss and violence, meditation and personal peace.
I loved the characters. They were real, and their problems were universal. Maybe communal living is the way to go. This book made me a ready believer. It also made me realize that one is never to old to try something new, to discover a new passion, savor a new hobby, embrace a new family. So many uplifting messages are layered in this beautifully crafted story. What more could one ask for in a reading selection for a long bus ride?
Profile Image for Marcia.
934 reviews4 followers
September 19, 2020
If you’re looking for a fast paced, tightly plotted reading experience, perhaps you should pass on Every Last Cuckoo by Kate Maloy. If, however, you delight in meeting characters that draw you in to a very special time and place, then by all means join the cuckoos in the warblers’ nest.

Sarah Lucas is a character who will live with me for some time. How often, of late, have I looked in the mirror and wondered just who that person staring back at me could be? How often, of late, have memories crowded in, demanding their space in my present? How often, of late, have I feared aging and inevitable separations? Sarah brings all of these fears and questions full circle, redefines her sense of self, and convinces that in the aftermath of inconsolable loss, life does go on…not the same, maybe not perfectly, but in some ways better.

The cover of Every Last Cuckoo beckoned, and I stepped inside the Vermont world of Sarah and Charles Lucas and emerged richer for having known them.

Reread for OTPS September 2020 book discussion.
500 reviews2 followers
May 29, 2017
At 72 it was nice to read a book where the main character was closer to my age. It deals with the reality of loss and the ability to carry on with the support of family and friends. It is a multigenerational story--no lives are perfect--everyone has their own baggage. I would have liked to know more about Angelo. A great first novel.
21 reviews1 follower
April 26, 2008
Life's too short not to embrace it. Why does it often take tragic situations to truly feel this way?
Profile Image for Les.
973 reviews16 followers
September 12, 2020
Reviewed on my blog in 2010:

It's been over two years since I first heard about Maloy's debut novel. Marcia (of Owl's Feathers) posted an enticing review which, along with the gorgeous cover art, whetted my appetite for a good "women's fiction" read. Eventually, I bought a copy of the book, but it wound up lingering for many, many months on one of the tables in our living room. Choosing to ignore some of the newer books I've acquired in the meantime, I snatched this one up as soon as I finished Making Toast and was immediately engrossed in Sarah's story. I loved the domestic details of her life and fifty-year marriage to Charles. Not a perfect marriage, by any means, but a real one consisting of love, friendship, devotion and mutual respect for one another's individuality.

Some favorite passages...

On memory:

This kind of thing happened more with age. Sarah was seventy-five. She had lived many thousands of days, so it was not surprising that scenes from an hour here or a moment there should surface at random. Her memories were beads jumbled loose in a box, unstrung. Everything—people, events, conversations—came and went so fast that only a fraction of the beads were ever stored at all. Few were whole, many cracked; most rolled away beneath pressing, present moments and were gone forever. What was the point?

On widowhood:

Sarah knew that life would go on for others even as it remained suspended for her. She had seen it happen before, the slow, cool shrinking back of friends when a person was thought to mourn too long, to fail at getting on with things. She could pretend when she had to, but nothing remained to be gotten on with. She got out of bed each morning with heavy reluctance, hating the look of her side rumpled and Charles's undisturbed. She took to lying flat in bed, pulling the covers up smooth over her outstretched form, then folding the top sheet over the edge before slipping out from underneath. Thus the bed was as good as made and the absence of Charles was less blatant before she even stood up. With that accomplished, she had sixteen hours to fill before unmaking her side of the bed once more.

On the elusiveness of death:

Early in April the warm breath of spring released ice and snow in torrents from their frozen imprisonment. Rivers and streams ran fast and muddy, breaching their banks in low places but otherwise furiously contained. Like the rivers, Sarah's grief ran fast and readily spilled over in low, private moments. She could picture herself sinking into sorrow as she'd done over her stillborn son. It was so easy; she could like back and let herself go dark. Death moved ceaselessly at the edge of her awareness, just out of reach, stalking her. She would startle when its immovable reality met her squarely in her thoughts. Surely she would be next. She was ashamed to feel so afraid. She half hoped she would lose her wits before her life. If dementia claimed her, she would never see her own death coming. There would be nothing to fear. Already she was not herself. How much was left to lose?

On grief:

Grief slipped away, only to attack from behind. It changed shape endlessly. It lacerated her, numbed her, stalked her, startled her, caught her by the throat. It deceived her eye with glimpses of Charles, her ear with the sound of his voice. She would turn and turn, expecting him, and find him gone. Again. Each time Sarah escaped her sorrow, forgetful amid other things, she lost him anew the instant she remembered he was gone.

I'm afraid I'm making this sound like yet another sad story about death, but it's really about more than just Sarah's loss. The first half of the book, described through flashbacks, details her life with Charles and their children. The second half is centered around Sarah's role as a mother of adult children, grandmother, and essentially that of a house mother. This gentle story about love and loss is a keeper and one, I'm sure, I'll read again.
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