White Gloves and Collards: A Memoir

by Helen Pruden Kaufmann

Against the backdrop of the civil rights movement, White Gloves and Collards is the story of a privileged childhood in Edenton, North Carolina, a small southern town that cherishes its customs and history as symbolized by the Confederate Monument at the foot of Broad Street. As she copes with the untimely deaths of her parents, young Helen observes how the community is coping with a different kind of loss—an end to the Jim Crow rules of behavior they’ve always lived by. With love and support from a brainy older brother, an eclectic extended family (many of whom are segregationists), and a wise African-American maid, she tries to make sense of the changes taking place around her, both in her personal life and in society as a whole.

256 pages, Paperback

First published October 25, 2013

About the author

A native of Edenton, Helen Pruden Kaufmann graduated from the University of North Carolina with a degree in American History. She was the community liaison for a public school desegregation program in Massachusetts before relocating with her family to California, where she has done writing and editorial work for educational organizations such as the Santa Clara County Office of Education, The Challenge 2000 education initiative of Joint Venture Silicon Valley, and the Martin Luther King, Jr. Research and Education Institute at Stanford. Helen and her husband now live in the San Diego area.

Reviews

[Amanda · Rating 4 out of 5]

I really enjoyed reading this book about the author's life growing up in a different time than me but yet in a very nearby town that I have frequently visited. It gave me insight into not only her life but also into how things were during that time in the area I grew up in that even now is hard to imagine. I was so delighted to come across this book by a local author! I would definitely recommend this book to everyone!

[Wendy · Rating 4 out of 5]

I very much enjoyed this book. My husband and I plan on retiring in Edenton, so learning more about the town and its residents was quite beneficial. Thank you, Helen! P.S. I hope to have my book signed one day when I live in Edenton and you are home in a visit!

[Carrie L. Allen · Rating 5 out of 5]

Enjoyable !

Helens' childhood was similar to mine - having grown up in east Texas during the 60's and 70's. I remember the confusing rules for whites and blacks, the painful reality and unfairness. Brings back good memories.

[Becky Morlok · Rating 4 out of 5]

This memoir came to my attention when it was mentioned on the alumni FaceBook page for St. Mary's in Raleigh. Otherwise, I'm not sure I would have known about White Gloves and Collards. Kaufmann is a St. Mary's graduate and, also like me, grew up in NC - Kauffman on the coast and me in the mountains.

The memoir was like traveling back in time - so many similarities and memories of my own. But I was really disappointed when she totally skipped her college years and went straight from high school graduation to becoming a new mother. She did such a great job through her early years, I wanted to continue to follow her through college in Raleigh and Chapel Hill. (I attended St. Mary's for high school and stayed in Raleigh for college). It felt like several chapters of the book were edited out - and I wasn't fond of her final 3-4 chapters. Nonetheless, it was a great read and opportunity to reflect on my own NC heritage.

[Virginia · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is a short, easy-to-read memoir of a woman growing up in the south during desegregation. I enjoyed the direct writing style, as well as the honesty in the voice. The book seamlessly mixes in "Little Helen's" confusion and growing distrust of segregation with standard teenage concerns, all amid a series of tragic personal losses. While Helen's privileged childhood protects her from the worst of the desegregation issues, it was very interesting to read about a childhood that was in some ways not unlike my own, but in many other ways, incredibly different.

While the back cover makes it sound like this will be a very sad book, Helen herself admits that she always believed that "there was absolutely nothing to be gained by wallowing in the past." This book is not a cry for pity or sympathy, and ultimately is about the bonds of love.

It was surprisingly good.

[Terri · Rating 5 out of 5]

Y'all, I just have to tell you how good this book is! I usually approach self-published books with trepidation… you just never know what you will get, and some are just awful. But I finally got a chance to start Helen Pruden Kaufmann's 'White Gloves and Collards' yesterday, and WOW! She is a real WRITER!

It is beautifully written -- by turns sweet, sad and laugh-out-loud funny… just like real life. It's fascinating to read about what it was like to grow up here in the 1950s and 1960s. Yes, there was plenty of casual racism, but there was great beauty and joy as well. Kaufmann captures it all wonderfully.

Can you tell that I am crazy about this book? Five stars!

[May Johnston · Rating 3 out of 5]

I thought it was very good and evoked my own memories of that era (well, I'm a decade or so younger than the author but I still have memories of the late 60's & early 70's). But the book was not as much about civil rights and racism as I thought it was going to be, and much more about her personal story of growing up and the personal tragedies in her family. (I realize it did say "memoir", but it still seemed "advertised" as more about civil rights/racism in the South). But, having said that, I still really enjoyed reading it.

[Lydia Hale · Rating 4 out of 5]

I received this book free through Goodreads First Reads. I enjoy memoirs, and I loved this book. Helen Pruden Kaufmann writes from the heart and with such honesty and emotion, that you become totally captured in her family's story. This book made me laugh and made me cry; and I couldn't wait to sit down and read. A very enjoyable book, and I highly recommend this book to anyone who enjoys memoirs, or loves reading stories about families!

[Ginny Quick · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book made me laugh, cry, remember childhood, love my mama, and so much more. Loved Kaufmann's description of her surroundings… the elegant charm in opposition to the harsh segregation of Edenton, North Carolina. The book is full of characters that you immediately fall in love with. I couldn't put it down!

[Denise · Rating 4 out of 5]

Good book about girl growing up in NC during the time of civil unrest. I identified with the author as I also grew up in NC a few years after her but remember many of the same things, such as segregation, racism in my own family and southern food and friends (black and white).

[Desiree · Rating 5 out of 5]

I received this book through a Goodreads giveaway, and absolutely loved it! Believing everyone has a story worth telling, I always get drawn into memoirs. Full of heartbreak, faith, hope, love, life lessons, and southern charm, "Little Helen's" story is a great read for any age!

[Anne · Rating 2 out of 5]

Just so so. I didn't hate it, but I wouldn't recommend it to anyone, and I'm really glad it was a free read on Kindle Unlimited.