“The Beastie always lies.” This is one of the main concepts taught in the first technique in this workbook. We tend to believe that our thoughts and feelings are true, and it is often quite profound when someone with depression or anxiety realizes that their thoughts and feelings are actually lying to them. The Beastie, which is what Dr. Moore calls the overactive parts of the brain that cause the automatic negative thinking of depression and anxiety, is formed by trauma and/or constant, repetitive negative thoughts and feelings.
This workbook was written by Dr. Moore to assist her patients in learning techniques they can do at home in order to begin to learn how to change their negative core beliefs and thought patterns into healing knowledge. By practicing these techniques over and over, one will begin the process of constant, repetitive positive thoughts and feelings that can actually change the brain pathways that cause depression and anxiety. This workbook is best used as an adjunct to the book Between Two Minds: Healing from Depression and Anxiety for LDS Women, but it can also be used alone for anyone choosing to change their thought processes to heal from depression and anxiety.
This book wasn't extremely helpful for me, except for the one of the Appendices, entitled, "For the Family: Dealing with a...Mother With Depression or Anxiety." My mother has both, and I have dealt with her all of my life. I continue to have to deal with her, not only as an adult daughter who would like to see her heal and enjoy life, but as a caregiver who tries to help her with life's demands. I think she could really benefit from most of this book. Below are some of the ideas that helped me.
"...our subconscious mind, formed in childhood, holds our paradigm, or the beliefs from which we act in life. However, because we are not completely aware of the beliefs of the subconscious mind, we are often not aware of why we think, feel and act as we do. By becoming more aware of what causes us to think, feel and act the way we do, we can learn and utilize techniques to be able to change and heal ourselves, with the help of God." The author never really gets into how to become more aware of why we have certain thought patterns. Perhaps one has to buy her workbook or pay her for counseling to get that information.
"Generally, when we expect something to happen a certain way, what we are really looking for is the good feelings we believe will come to us and our loved ones if things happen the way we expect them to. However, it is possible to receive the same feelings without the event happening the way we expect it to. And having the event happen the way we expect it to doesn't guarantee that we will feel those feelings." Let go of expectations!
"Let go of trying so hard to change. Let go of trying so hard to be happy. Just know that it is possible. Allow yourself to simply be, allow yourself to be okay just the way you are. Allow yourself to have kind thoughts towards yourself, to let go of judgment of yourself. Put away the self-critic and allow the self-counselor to work in kindness and gentleness with you, and you will find joy in yourself."
01/02/14 I just realized I reviewed the workbook instead of the actual book. I'm not changing it now, but I didn't actually read the workbook. This review and all comments were for the actual book. Oops.
This book club selection was not a book I would have chosen on my own, but I was surprisingly affected by its message. I think the first half of the book should be titled, "Advice on how to live a happier, more successful life," because many of the topics applied universally to men and women everywhere. There were insights that changed my perspective on myself and the world around me, and I am amazed at how much this book taught me on how to understand my daily relationships with others. I am painfully aware of the messages I am sending my children daily, and this book helped me to see where I was going wrong in spite of good intentions, and how to better approach discipline to have emotionally and mentally healthy children.
I am going to buy a copy for a relative that suffers from depression, but think it is a good read for anyone who has an open mind and is willing to see and change their own perspective on daily relationships and on how to attain true happiness and daily contentment. While I can't say I agree with every opinion expressed, it was still a very thought provoking book. Very well done.