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The Diary of a Reluctant Feminist
'The problem is the small print in my struggle for a divorce; as with everything in my life, it always reads 'subject to my mother's permission.' And since my mother was not going to give me permission to divorce in a hurry, I was relegated to being an armchair divorcee. But Indian parents will never voluntarily give their children permission to get divorced or have a live-in relationship or conceive a child by any means other than Immaculate Conception which, of course, would only take place after the child is married. So I decided, after two years of being separated, to stop waiting for my parents' elusive permission, and to take the initial steps in the painful journey myself. In this process, I was also branded a 'feminist', which in their view is marginally worse than being a terrorist...'
The Diary of a Reluctant Feminist is a profoundly funny chronicle of a young woman's attempt to get divorced as-opposed more by her own parents than her in-laws and her ex-she struggles to explan the flimsy grounds of incompatibility to her disapproving, old-fashioned, middle-class Punjabi family. Warm, humorous, sad and wise, this is a book for everyone who has ever dreaded telling their parents an uncomfortable truth about themselves.
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The Diary of a Reluctant Feminist is a profoundly funny chronicle of a young woman's attempt to get divorced as-opposed more by her own parents than her in-laws and her ex-she struggles to explan the flimsy grounds of incompatibility to her disapproving, old-fashioned, middle-class Punjabi family. Warm, humorous, sad and wise, this is a book for everyone who has ever dreaded telling their parents an uncomfortable truth about themselves.
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248 pages, Paperback
First published November 15, 2013
About the author
Bhavna Bhavna
2 books6 followersBhavna Bhavna is a certified public accountant, a full-time writer, and a mother of two. She is convinced that her life has started resembling a bad Bollywood blockbuster – replete with clichéd dialogue, copious tears and cheesy one-liners – ever since she decided to break away and live life on her own terms. She has come to realize how difficult it is to do this in middle-class India.
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Displaying 1 - 13 of 13 reviews
March 20, 2014
A truly Indian & genuinely authentic book which feels just like eating a home cooked meal in a restaurant.. the familiarity, the connection, all the geuine little touches that make it so exclusively "Undivided Middle Class Nation" flavored. The writing style's simple & matter of fact, but it makes the narrative's truth all the more believable. All the characters in the book are so familiar, you can connect to the complexities & helplessness of Baby's character in the midst of all that chaos & web of indirect emotional demands from the other people around her. It's a simple, honest exploration of a woman's journey & changing relationships narrated in a witty, funny & deeply personal way.. a must read to gain some perspective on an Indian woman's life.
March 28, 2014
Amazing and a light-hearted book
It's a MUST READ !!Read it overnight
Humorous and Funny chronicles of a young woman's attempt to get a divorce.
The checklist included in every chapter are just awesome!!
The Die-vorce thing is absolutely hilarious
The book, very carefully written, brings out the discrimination based on gender.
The parent response part is absolutely hilarious!
It gives a true picture of how society reacts to any woman who speaks for herself.
It is one of the best books I've read
incredibly amazing awestrucking remarkable book!!!!
It's a MUST READ !!Read it overnight
Humorous and Funny chronicles of a young woman's attempt to get a divorce.
The checklist included in every chapter are just awesome!!
The Die-vorce thing is absolutely hilarious
The book, very carefully written, brings out the discrimination based on gender.
The parent response part is absolutely hilarious!
It gives a true picture of how society reacts to any woman who speaks for herself.
It is one of the best books I've read
incredibly amazing awestrucking remarkable book!!!!
April 10, 2014
The Author Bhavna Bhavna through her name itself negates the notion of adopting a last name which is either through father or husband,products of patriarchy.She is not a feminist but a Reluctant feminist because she herself is stuck between India and Indian parents,who in particular are carriers of orthodoxy in India.Through her light hearted book and witty comedy she is not narrating an exceptional tale but a tale that most of us shy away from discussing,we all have gone through some or other phase she has discussed about,but we usually ignore the details she has mentioned.
It is about her journey from being a daughter to a daughter in law and a wife in typical Indian punjabi family where she is striving to become "an independent being". She dwells into the psyche of Indian parents and their children, that helps us to relate it with our parents and ourselves.
For her parents she has become the 'worst' child from being the most obedient one.Yes,in India children are categorized as good,bad,worse according to their art of nodding to what their parents say.But she is no ordinary child rather she is the sole arbiter of all worries and diseases to her parents as she chose to break free from strands of her 'unhappy marriage'.For Indian parents,marriage is always equivalent to happiness,no mater what one has to adjust and make is happy.
She chose to write this book not only to throw light on 'lack of independence in Indian family' but also posing larger questions like "why are men treated like god here?". Without a man, a woman is incomplete especially if she is a "DIE-VORCED WOMAN",she is treated as a hapless creature devoid of aspirations of leading her life on her own rather she is termed as "immoral kritya" in society. By society she refers to that Indian society where "Log kya kahenge" is the most important thing.
R.I.P Orthodoxy.
Wisdom comes from taking your own decisions and learning from them to be a responsible individual, this is the key lesson to be learnt from this book.
So, all the girls who are trying to gain their own identity, striving for independence, Do read this book. The ones shying away to walk away from a unhappy marriage,read it,this may be your story.
I thoroughly loved it, from vivid details to satirical humor,poetry in beginning and check lists at the end of ever chapter.
A job well done by Bhavna Ma'am who is away from literature field and yet wrote amazing piece of work.
A MUST READ.
It is about her journey from being a daughter to a daughter in law and a wife in typical Indian punjabi family where she is striving to become "an independent being". She dwells into the psyche of Indian parents and their children, that helps us to relate it with our parents and ourselves.
For her parents she has become the 'worst' child from being the most obedient one.Yes,in India children are categorized as good,bad,worse according to their art of nodding to what their parents say.But she is no ordinary child rather she is the sole arbiter of all worries and diseases to her parents as she chose to break free from strands of her 'unhappy marriage'.For Indian parents,marriage is always equivalent to happiness,no mater what one has to adjust and make is happy.
She chose to write this book not only to throw light on 'lack of independence in Indian family' but also posing larger questions like "why are men treated like god here?". Without a man, a woman is incomplete especially if she is a "DIE-VORCED WOMAN",she is treated as a hapless creature devoid of aspirations of leading her life on her own rather she is termed as "immoral kritya" in society. By society she refers to that Indian society where "Log kya kahenge" is the most important thing.
R.I.P Orthodoxy.
Wisdom comes from taking your own decisions and learning from them to be a responsible individual, this is the key lesson to be learnt from this book.
So, all the girls who are trying to gain their own identity, striving for independence, Do read this book. The ones shying away to walk away from a unhappy marriage,read it,this may be your story.
I thoroughly loved it, from vivid details to satirical humor,poetry in beginning and check lists at the end of ever chapter.
A job well done by Bhavna Ma'am who is away from literature field and yet wrote amazing piece of work.
A MUST READ.
February 22, 2015
This book, as the title conveys is a narrative of the struggles the author faced, as a woman who belong to a middle-class Indian family when she took her decision to end her unhappy marriage. The entire events are described with an edge of sarcasm to it. Though personally, I don’t agree with some of the points mentioned by the author, I admit that none of the events described in this book are exaggerated. This is just how 99% of Indian families react when their daughter suggests she wants a divorce owing to an unhappy marriage with an incompatible partner.
The author also describes the measures she took to stay strong throughout the ordeal. For some, it might sound more of a jabber by a person who is upset with everyone around her. For the others who can sympathize with her would know that it is a diary and don’t we tell every little thing to our diary. :)
A quick read.
The author also describes the measures she took to stay strong throughout the ordeal. For some, it might sound more of a jabber by a person who is upset with everyone around her. For the others who can sympathize with her would know that it is a diary and don’t we tell every little thing to our diary. :)
A quick read.
January 12, 2014
The Diary of a Reluctant Feminist is a profoundly funny chronicle of a young woman's attempt to get divorced as - opposed more by her own parents than her in-laws and her ex-she struggles to explain the flimsy grounds of incompatibility to her disapproving, old-fashioned, middle-class Punjabi family.
Read the complete review of The Diary of a Reluctant Feminist at
http://www.thebookoutline.com/2014/01...
Read the complete review of The Diary of a Reluctant Feminist at
http://www.thebookoutline.com/2014/01...
April 5, 2014
A glimpse at the cover reveals a light hearted read, you would think. But on turning the pages, you realize that this book has deep nuances, and how with wit and clarity Bhavna touches upon the crying need of women to really be heard. Her anecdotes are picturesque and she writes straight from the heart, which needs courage. I loved reading every page, and highly recommend it. A must read for men, especially!
March 7, 2014
The writer has flair flow honesty and purpose.
It has definite relation to present day social situations not just in north of India but around the world.
A must read to understand the follies of environmental conditioning and if one wants to overcome getting engulfed in them.
A classic of sorts.
It has definite relation to present day social situations not just in north of India but around the world.
A must read to understand the follies of environmental conditioning and if one wants to overcome getting engulfed in them.
A classic of sorts.
April 4, 2014
A wonderful book. It is not very often that a writer is able to convey such a delicate subject with such balance of substance and humour. The book is brilliantly refreshing, utterly funny, highly emotive and above all just an excellent read. Well done for a fantastic book. 5 Stars Bhavna Bhavna!!
March 7, 2014
The writer has flair flow honesty and purpose.
It has definite relation to present day social situations not just in north of India but around the world.
A must read to understand the follies of environmental conditioning and if one wants to overcome getting engulfed in them.
A classic of sorts.
It has definite relation to present day social situations not just in north of India but around the world.
A must read to understand the follies of environmental conditioning and if one wants to overcome getting engulfed in them.
A classic of sorts.
April 2, 2014
Bhavna has demonstrated tremendous courage in writing about a topic that is sadly not discussed enough, a topic that most Indian families are unwilling to discuss even behind closed doors. Beautifully written, Bhavna uses humor in a way that lightens the subject but doesn't devalue her message,
January 4, 2014
It is funny in bits and parts, though I wish it had more of a 'story' to it. It reads like a really really long blogpost. But had a few good laughs.
May 30, 2014
Funny entertaining
Can't put down
Definitely worth a read
Can't put down
Definitely worth a read
December 2, 2016
This book was hilarious in many ways. Anyone with south Asian/Desi parents would relate to it. If not fully then atleast some of it.
Displaying 1 - 13 of 13 reviews