'I think I left my mark on the world. Some people would call it a scar, but I'm healing that scar with my comeback. It's just a scab now.'
Mr Icon. Legend. Puppet. Once an international film star (and the highest-paid performer of the 1970s), Mr Monkey had it all - a busty blonde wife, ten sports cars... even a butler. But, he threw it all away! Now a fallen figure, and a disgrace to his family, friends and fans, the depressed puppet has spent the last eight years sporadically updating an online diary. Here, for the first time ever, are the collected diary entries from one of the world's most enigmatic and criminally-insane figures. Eternally on the cusp of a comeback, this is Mr Monkey at his most revealing.