How to Lose Friends and Alienate People

by Irving D. Tressler

"How to Lose Friends and Alienate People" is a bare-faced satire on the worldwide bestseller book, Dale Carnegie's How to Win Friends and Influence People. It is also a self-help book, but it tackles the issue from the other side. Irving always considered that Dale Carnegie was all wrong when he encouraged people to smile and be optimistic. His philosophy is totally different. For Irving, great life achievements can be made by those who live negatively. In this book you will find advice on how to lose friends and make people hate you so that you will be more productive and successful in your life. This is a self-help book that you have never and will never read something similar to. It is the only book that has ever been written to help people dissolve their human relationships in favor of having a better life! According to Irving, some of us are born with ability to make others peeved, but most of us aren't. We flounder about making empty, vapid, pleasing remarks and before we know it we have another “friend” and have invited him to lunch “someday”. The trouble with most of us is that we don't talk enough. We let the other person get in his views and opinions and permit him to think we are interested in what he has to say. As a result we have “friends” who “drop in to say hello”, corner us on streets to point out what we already know about the weather, invite us to boring dinners, arrange stupid theater parties, and in general ignore the fact that most of us are non-gregarious. Tressler has made a living by teaching people how to talk and tell others what they are thinking. That is every man's trouble—he never says what he thinks when he thinks it. Tressler helped people overcome this through his courses. He has developed a course that is one of the significant movements in U. S. social history, a course that's as real as halitosis and even more lasting in its results. How to Lose Friends and Alienate People was written for those who were unable to attend his course. It is aimed at the millions who don't know how to avoid being bored daily in office and home, on street and at table by people who are just plain dull!

109 pages, Kindle Edition

First published January 1, 1937

About the author

Irving Dart Tressler was an American writer and Journalist.

Reviews

[Jessaka · Rating 3 out of 5]

Never Admit You Are Wrong:
“You” A snake is an amphibian.”
Victim: “No, it’s not.”
You: “Do you think I amphibian to you?”

My sister was reading me titles of our mom’s books, the ones that she now owns. I had read this book of hers when I was taking post graduate classes after graduating from high school. For those who have never heard of post graduate work, I can only say that I went back to high school for another year. This time, instead of taking more pre college courses, I took business.

When reading this book back then, I thought that it was hilarious because it was a parody of the best seller, “How to Win Friends and Influence People.” Well, it was not funny this time around, in fact, I quit reading it when I was more than halfway through it. Strange how that happens. Yet, people must still buy it since it is now on kindle.

It rather went like this: Where the author of “How to Win Friends” said to smile and compliment people, this author said to snarl and put them down when you first meet them. Examples: You tell a woman that her slip is showing, or you can ask a man where he got his wig, because you want one like it. If you are invited to dinner and don’t wish to ever be invited again, you go to the dinner but make sure you are never invited again. To insure this, You pick your teeth, lean back on the chair and belch, if served corn, on the cob, you rip down the rolls fast and don’t stop until you are finished, and you can write on their good tablecloth and then crawl around on the floor looking for your fork.

So, now to my post graduate year at high school: My typing teacher, Mr. Burnell, must have mentioned the book, “How to Win Friends,” because I told him about this book, and he wanted to read it, so I brought it to class the next day. Days later, he came to my home with the book in hand. My mom answered the door, said I wasn’t home, and he seemed disappointed. He had written a speech using the book, thought it was funny, and then left. My mom thought that he had a crush on me. Moms are like that. They want to marry you off fast.

Poor Mr. Burnell. One of the girls in my shorthand class used to tease him unmercifully, and other girls joined her. Once when he went into the supply room, two of the girls closed the door on him and pressed their bodies against the door so he couldn’t get out. Then they rushed back to their seats so he wouldn’t know who did it. Another time whenhe went out of the room, they shoved a desk against the door. Then one day one of the girls asked us all to wear bracelets that jingled because he didn’t like the noise they caused. One day when he was writing on the board, the same girl went up to the chalk board and wrote, “Are you through?” and he wrote back, “No, but you are.” That got a good laugh. And then students would eat corn nuts because he hated how they smelled. Or they would ask him to repeat what he had just said. One day, I decided to join them. I brought an apple to my typing class, and whenever he turned his back, I would take a bite out of it, and the students would laugh. When he turned around, he didn’t know why they had been laughing. I then put the apple core on his desk when he had left the room. Last of all, some students put his Volkswagen bug in the hallway, and when he saw it, he had to drive it out the door and down the steps.

So, this book, instead of entertaining me as it once had, just brought back memories of Mr. Burnell, who I hope is living a good life.

[Patricia · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is a terrifically refreshing book. It is direct, frank and outrageous - claiming to be the ultimate self--help book in reclaiming one's own time for oneself. This book was written before television became the norm and people started isolating themselves. Irving D. Tressler writes in an exaggerated style and advocates rudeness, insult and one-upmanship to drive people away. It is not for a second to be taken seriously, but it is sort of an anti-novel, an antidote to Dr. Phil McGraw. It's ground-breaking performance art, for having been written in 1937.

[Amabile · Rating 3 out of 5]

Nesse livro o autor cria uma estrutura onde o personagem principal conta sua história de um ponto de vista que poucas vezes paramos para olhar e refletir. Ele constrói um espelho onde podemos olhar para nossos piores defeitos e fazermos uma reflexão a respeito. Atitudes que temos em nossa vida, muitas vezes egoísta que nos leva a ser pessoas realmente sem amigos e odiados pelo próximo. É um livro reflexivo de um jeito extremamente divertido. Claro que nem todas as atividades citadas no livro cabem perfeitamente em sua vida - e eu não cobraria tanto assim do autor pois ele quis realmente abranger uma enorme parte do que chamamos de "olhar para o próprio umbigo e esquecer o outro" e fez isso muito bem - mas em cada história há uma possibilidade de repensar sobre seus próprios atos.

[Nancy Randall · Rating 5 out of 5]

Yes, this is a parody...why else would it be dedicated to Hitler, as a person who "doesn't need to read it" and amazingly this was written in 1937, before WW2 officially started! Clever...prescient, and especially useful when telling you how to deal with unwanted house guests! See chapter 8. :)

[Márcio Sobrinho · Rating 3 out of 5]

Divertido e, às vezes, cruel. (Obs: Não conheço essa edição da Austrr, li numa antiga impressa ainda nos "Estados Unidos do Brasil).

[Natacha Pastore · Rating 5 out of 5]

Pensei que se tratasse de uma paródia literária, uma pastiche cômica e não um livro MEGA informativo. É um guia real para a vida em paz.
Amém para o livrinho!

[Cæsar · Rating 3 out of 5]

Intriguing!

[John · Rating 5 out of 5]

The most inspirational book I have ever read. Truly life changing.