Claimed by a Coffee Mug: An Erotic Romance Short Story

by Shayla Storm

Nora did not expect to find love in a thrift store--or that he would be a coffee mug.

Emerson might not look like a man, but he is certainly no inanimate object. As Nora attempts to determine what to do about this twist in her life, she finds herself falling for her thrift store find. When her friends learn her secret, they determine to put this strange relationship to an end.

How can Nora reconcile what the world expects, and what her heart, and body, wants?

Claimed by a Coffee Mug is a short story with explicit content--yes, with a coffee mug.

Genres: Romance

66 pages, Kindle Edition

Published June 5, 2022

Reviews

[Nataliya · Rating 3 out of 5]

“Was a coffee mug … coming onto me?”

When a relative gets you an erotic coffee mug book for Christmas, should you be worried?

Let’s find out.

😬😬😬😬😬😬 ☕️

“I probably should be more concerned with bringing this cursed object into my house — clearly, this mug was cursed— but that was always the risk with secondhand finds, wasn’t it?
I couldn’t imagine how this situation was going to end.”

I can, I can! I somehow have a pretty confident feeling that a sexy coffee mug and our brave heroine may find some sexy sexy times. Who cares about biological plausibility? We do not discriminate on the bases of being a mug; nothing stands in a way of true love.

In a classic example of interspecies - inter-object?- romance, a trip to a store end up with the purchase of a used coffee mug (with eyes nobody else can see and a voice nobody else can hear). And I am warily eyeing my sexy yellow Yeti coffe mug praying to all the deities that it’s a soulless thing.

“It wasn’t every day — or any other day— that most people met a living coffee mug that contained the soul of a man cursed by a witch three hundred years ago.”

One thing leads to another — and of course, logically, three paragraphs later there’s our first mention of “aching pussy”. Because who can resist the appeal of a coffee mug?

“The idea I was destined for a *coffee mug* was too much for my brain for tonight.”

They are soulmates. I mean, I am semi-convinced that my coffee mug understands me in the ways nobody else can, but Nora here takes it a brave step further.

“In one motion, I yanked my shirt up and over my head, revealing my breasts bulging over the top of my bra.”

Girl, get yourself a bra that fits. A breast muffin-top sounds uncomfortable and unsupportive.

Also, this coffee mug magnum opus is just 60 pages. Do we really need the words “glistening folds” repeated twice, the second time by a horny coffee mug? But oh well, I’m assuming that erotica is mandated to have a few instances of this.

“Did I fuck a mug last night?”

Yeah, you did. Yeah, you did. And when a mug turns into a sexy blond dirty-talking lumberjack from 1720 England, it’s true love. Of course.

3 coffee mugs.

——————
Also posted on my blog.

[Simone · Rating 3 out of 5]

Watching Beauty and The Beast as a child has prepared me for this.

[Urtė Caspo · Rating 2 out of 5]

Kaip pagarsėjusi šūdų skaitytoja kartais dar sugebu save nustebinti kliteratūriniais pasirinkimais. Nebūčiau pagalvojusi, kad mergina gali įsimylėti sendaikčių parduotuvėje pamatytą puodelį, kuris — senbernis iš 1720 m., kurį užbūrė ragana. Labai kūrybiška 👍.

[Mei ☽︎]

As soon as a friend shared this with me, I knew I needed to do a weird readalong of it because I NEEDED to know what the mug would do. Overall, this is a very quick 60+ page read, but not as weird as some of the other ones I've read. 😂 Basically, 🌶️-wise, (rundown of spice scenes) 2-2.5 scenes of FMC playing with herself when the MMC's a mug and him watching from a distance, and then one major scene with FMC rubbing herself directly against him as a mug, and then one final scene of both of them as humans.

I mean, all things considered, this FMC, Nora, was very calm about the whole situation, and only external characters were concerned for her, but it's all good 'cause love, am I right??? The actual explanation with the curse was pretty sufficient, but there was lack of follow-up in terms of what would actually cure him. Leslie was a good best friend for wanting to help her friend out. 😂

Disney's Beauty and the Beast came in clutch in helping me imagining the cup because this guy was described as having human eyes, and I immediately thought of Annoying Orange for some reason and I was like NO THANKS. 😂 Anyway, there was DEFINITELY missed opportunities with the mug (like you're really gonna tell me she doesn't drink out of him ONCE even after he basically flirted with her to do so??), but I'm just glad she didn't do anything dangerous with it. 🤣

[TJ · Rating 3 out of 5]

...the mug's a Brit and I have a thing for British guys

[Alysia-lee · Rating 3 out of 5]

3⭐️ some people might ask how I’m not ashamed and I can guarantee you I am beyond ashamed 🫣🤭

[Devon · Rating 2 out of 5]

What on earth did I just read.

[what.rachel.reads · Rating 2 out of 5]

Funny (see highlights for amazingness), weird, it fast tracked to exhibitionism, and even if the best friend was looking out for Nora, what she did would’ve still been super rude.

[L Hope · Rating 2 out of 5]

why…

Why did you write this, and why did I read it. Who’s the target audience for this? Quick read, not bad considering.

[Belle’s Library]

Yo what is this 😂

[Mel · Rating 5 out of 5]

5 stars for the absolute absurdity that is this book. Don't get me wrong, this is NOT a good book, it's just so fucking funny

[Holly · Rating 4 out of 5]

This was kinda amazing.
Brit lad turned into a mug by an evil witch 300 years ago falls in love and is very dominant in the bedroom..
Kinky Beauty and the Beast?? Sassy Brit, smut, somewhat of a plot, what more can you ask for from inanimate objects erotica!?

Spice was 5/5 🌶

[Rachael]

I’m sorry… What?

[COURTZ · Rating 5 out of 5]

I love this book! I read it in less than an hour it’s a cute short book!

[Maria · Rating 3 out of 5]

This has not been the weirdest of the erotica that I have read... but I also could be becoming desensitized lmao. This seemed like a retelling of Beauty and the Beast. But instead of being turned into a beast, he was turned into a coffee mug. Three stars. Definitely entertaining but not on the level of Unhinged.

Story Spoilers from this point forward

The story starts with a woman named Nora who is thrift shopping. A mug catches her eye so she picks it up to inspect it. All of a sudden, there is a jolt in her arm and the mug is yelling at her to put it down. She sets it down and realizes the mug has HUMAN EYES looking back at her. So she buys the mug and goes back home. The mug reveals his name is Emerson Blackmore and he was turned into a mug by a witch in Britain in 1720. Nora has a hard time processing this so she calls her friend Leslie to help. Leslie comes over and of course can't hear the mug speaking or see its eyes. So Leslie thinks Nora is insane. Emerson the mug then tells Nora that only his soulmate can communicate with him. She winds up masturbating in front of the mug twice and it is weird. Anyway, the nest day Leslie invites Nora to go out to lunch with her and a few friends. Nora is nervous about leaving Emerson the mug at home alone, so she tucks him into a tote bag and takes him along with her to lunch. She gets to lunch and Leslie notices that Nora is being very protective of her tote bag. Nora ends up spilling some coffee on herself and goes to the bathroom to wash up. When she gets back to the table, Leslie says that she needs to leave for whatever reason, and Nora realizes that Emerson is missing from her bag! Nora walks around town looking for him for hours when she finally finds him on a bench. She takes him home and they go to bed together (she props him up with pillows and turns the TV on for him). When she wakes up she is horny so she decides to masturbate again but this time, she places Emerson the mug directly in front of her. Emerson is instructing her through various motions, and then tells Nora to use him... and she does. After this, Leslie stops by and tries to take Emerson the mug from Nora and they get into a physical fight. Emerson the mug goes flying through the air, Nora yells "I love you!" and all of a sudden the curse is broken and Emerson the mug is now Emerson the human. And then they go have sex.

[Kate Corrigan · Rating 5 out of 5]

If you were looking for a book to start with in the sentient object smut genre, this Beauty & The Beast retelling would be one of my immediate recommendations. What would be the odds...

It's campy, weird, 🌶️🌶️🌶️, had decent characters, and a storyline. Instead of a beast, there is a British 300+ year old cursed coffee mug that started talking to Nora (MC) so she liberated him for $1.50. She had some intention of breaking the curse but instead liked his companionship and eventually explored him, as a mug and man, in many ways.

I oddly enjoyed the parts where Nora and Emerson (the mug) simply were hanging out and getting to know each other. Yes, he was mug, but it was cute. The 🌶️🌶️🌶️ was out of 5. It's a short read, and the scenes are detailed with one being... a bit.. unique., but fairly mild all things (in the genre) considered.

[Kellie Johnson · Rating 3 out of 5]

This book was very quick and easy to read. It was somewhat silly but I’m not even mad though. Compared to some of the weird erotica and smut I’ve read in the past, this one was actually pretty decent. I love the idea of a man cured to be an inanimate object, and the FMC trying to figure out how to help him. I actually found myself feeling kinda sorry for the man-mug. I was unironically rooting for the main characters. A solid 3 stars as I have no shame at this point.

[ShaCrista · Rating 5 out of 5]

unhinged

This was an interesting read. Despite the cover art and unhinged topic, it’s a good story. The “best friend” made me want to scream, but I’m glad the main character stood her ground. She knew things were weird with the mug and that others wouldn’t understand. I actually couldn’t put this down. Lol

[Christina · Rating 4 out of 5]

When your cousin/bestie gives u this for xmas, you have to save it to read it on a day you’re feeling down. I was pleasantly surprised by the story: an evil witch cursed a British man and transformed him into a mug for 300 years. Only true love (and smut) broke the curse.
* Gave Beauty and the Beast vibes
* Silly and quick read to help get you out of a rut
* HEA!

[Daniella Dabrowski · Rating 3 out of 5]

The entire book is just insane but I loved it. I mean, a mug!?! What in the actual heck?!? I give it 3 stars because I wish this was a full length novel! I enjoyed the connection they had. I just wish there was more! I hope there's a part two because I need more of their story!!!!

[ladybreww · Rating 3 out of 5]

well that was interesting

I'll admit I was curious how the logistics were going to work. To me, banging a coffee mug sounds cold (ceramic). I also kept picturing the teacup from beauty & the beast so I think I need therapy now.

[Michelle Patton · Rating 4 out of 5]

I read this based on a review and recommendation from a friend. I was pleasantly surprised! If you’re looking for a quick read with spice and a happy ending that’s just a little bit of an odd plot, look no further!

[Taschi N. · Rating 4 out of 5]

Suprisingly Not bad

[kayla · Rating 2 out of 5]

well, those were words 🙂

[Rachel (Rae) · Rating 3 out of 5]

Honestly, this was alright. It had some insanely cringe moments but that's to be expected.

[EriLily24 · Rating 3 out of 5]

It has lots of typos. It had the potential to be an oddly wonderful book but the author chose to rush to the ending.

[Kitt · Rating 4 out of 5]

interesting premise

this was weirdly cute, a bit disjointed in editing but i definitely enjoyed it! would have loved to seen more between them before he changed back to human.

[Fatima Jade · Rating 1 out of 5]

STOP WRITING THESE< I CANT STOP READING THEM<<ヽ((◎д◎))ゝ

[Angel McCoy · Rating 1 out of 5]

Take my kindle away. I have too much time at work.

[Annica Farnsworth · Rating 5 out of 5]

What a romp!

10/10 The premise is great, great humor and as someone who collects thrift store mugs, maybe I too, can get so lucky.