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Housewife Theologian: How the Gospel Interrupts the Ordinary
This book is for women—for all women who want to explore beneath the superficial and get to know God, and themselves, better.
While striving to find meaning amid the mundane and ordinary, many women find themselves swallowed up by culture's expectations, trying to escape the labels that trap and define them. But Aimee Byrd is determined to reclaim terms like housewife, which have divided many women, to unite them instead in their common calling.
What is this calling, and how can women rise above what the world offers? By taking back another term—theologian—and knowing God intimately. Aimee will help you evaluate your Christian life and see your world from a different perspective.
While striving to find meaning amid the mundane and ordinary, many women find themselves swallowed up by culture's expectations, trying to escape the labels that trap and define them. But Aimee Byrd is determined to reclaim terms like housewife, which have divided many women, to unite them instead in their common calling.
What is this calling, and how can women rise above what the world offers? By taking back another term—theologian—and knowing God intimately. Aimee will help you evaluate your Christian life and see your world from a different perspective.
243 pages, Kindle Edition
First published August 16, 2013
46 people are currently reading
707 people want to read
About the author
Aimee Byrd
13 books195 followersAimee Byrd is just an ordinary mom of three who has also been a martial arts student, coffee shop owner, and Bible study teacher. Author of Housewife Theologian, she now blogs about theology and the Christian life and cohosts The Mortification of Spin podcast.
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 51 reviews
June 19, 2017
First of all, let me dispense with any thoughts of "Well, I'm not a housewife, so this book isn't for me." If you are a "married woman; a man's partner in marriage", then according to the dictionary definition that Aimee shares, you are a housewife. And I will also say that even if you are not married, this book is still for you because it isn't a marriage book.
Secondly, let me also dispense with any thoughts of "Well, I don't get theology, so this book isn't for me". Aimee points out that every single one of us is a theologian, whether or not we know the precise terms for what we believe. And even if we haven't formally studied theology (as is frequently the case among Christian women), we should always be seeking to know God better.
There is the foundation of the book: every woman should be seeking to know God better. As we deepen our knowledge and understanding of God, our minds should be transformed to think biblically about every aspect of life. And biblical thinking flows out into biblical actions. The gospel is not just words in a special book; our daily life is transformed by the truth of God's word and the reality of what Christ has done for us.
Aimee then chooses a few significant areas of life where women struggle to think biblically and fleshes out how true theology should affect our everyday choices. Some of these areas are marriage, sexuality, beauty, identity, idolatry, belonging to a church, studying theology and learning about God and what it means to live out our vocation in a biblical manner.
One of my favorite chapters was her chapter on true beauty. What is it? What does God think about it? In a world where women face pressure every day to be beautiful, I found this chapter to be freeing. I love what Aimee says about true beauty: "Everything beautiful points to God. When you admire a pleasing face, it's God's excellence of artistry that you are admiring." The three qualities that Aimee believes form part of a biblical definition of beauty are truthfulness, originality and purity. Scripture's definition of beauty definitely seems to stem from an inner strength of godly character rather than simply physical features and Aimee concludes that true beauty is about Christ sanctifying our characters.
To add to all the wonderfully challenging words, Aimee has purposely designed this book to be used in a workshop setting. Each chapter contains excellent journaling questions which can then be used in a small group or larger group discussion format. I so appreciated how her desire is for women to be discipling each other and she makes a note of suggesting that even high school girls should be included in the generational mentoring.
Hope your interest is peaked! A great book for you to read alone or with a group of women!
Secondly, let me also dispense with any thoughts of "Well, I don't get theology, so this book isn't for me". Aimee points out that every single one of us is a theologian, whether or not we know the precise terms for what we believe. And even if we haven't formally studied theology (as is frequently the case among Christian women), we should always be seeking to know God better.
There is the foundation of the book: every woman should be seeking to know God better. As we deepen our knowledge and understanding of God, our minds should be transformed to think biblically about every aspect of life. And biblical thinking flows out into biblical actions. The gospel is not just words in a special book; our daily life is transformed by the truth of God's word and the reality of what Christ has done for us.
Aimee then chooses a few significant areas of life where women struggle to think biblically and fleshes out how true theology should affect our everyday choices. Some of these areas are marriage, sexuality, beauty, identity, idolatry, belonging to a church, studying theology and learning about God and what it means to live out our vocation in a biblical manner.
One of my favorite chapters was her chapter on true beauty. What is it? What does God think about it? In a world where women face pressure every day to be beautiful, I found this chapter to be freeing. I love what Aimee says about true beauty: "Everything beautiful points to God. When you admire a pleasing face, it's God's excellence of artistry that you are admiring." The three qualities that Aimee believes form part of a biblical definition of beauty are truthfulness, originality and purity. Scripture's definition of beauty definitely seems to stem from an inner strength of godly character rather than simply physical features and Aimee concludes that true beauty is about Christ sanctifying our characters.
To add to all the wonderfully challenging words, Aimee has purposely designed this book to be used in a workshop setting. Each chapter contains excellent journaling questions which can then be used in a small group or larger group discussion format. I so appreciated how her desire is for women to be discipling each other and she makes a note of suggesting that even high school girls should be included in the generational mentoring.
Hope your interest is peaked! A great book for you to read alone or with a group of women!
December 29, 2019
Useful and insightful in many ways, this impressive first book from Aimee Byrd has (understandably) had a significant influence on conservative Reformed and Evangelical Christian women since its publication. It’s greatest strength is its exhortation to women not to settle for theologically milquetoast “women’s material,” but rather to recognize that they are called to be theologians in their own right, thinking seriously about God and His relations to mankind. See especially chapter three in this regard.
It is light on polemics, and heavy on personal reflection. At points, Byrd is admirably - if a bit uncomfortably - vulnerable. That being said, too much of the book is intensely personal and autobiographical. I would classify the book as memoir, if it weren’t for her stated aim of resourcing Christian women’s book clubs and discipleship studies. But the book’s heavy autobiographical element does not serve its purpose. In fact, Byrd’s constant use of her own experience to illustrate her points and to drive home her recommendations does a disservice to her stated agenda, weakening the prosecution of the task she has laid out before herself: to offer a popular-level theological women’s resource that stands out from the standard fare available from most Evangelical Christian book publishers. Her purpose would have been more effectively achieved if she had taken a less autobIographical approach in writing the book.
Influences include much good material from twentieth and twenty-first century popular Reformed literature. Having witnessed Byrd’s more recent theological trajectory, I was pleasantly surprised by her positive treatment of complementarianism, and her approving citations of John Piper, John MacArthur, Vodie Baucham, and others. Her exploration of sin was theologically rich, drawing deeply from Jeremiah Burroughs (and Thomas Brooks). The influence of modern Reformed Two Kingdoms (think David Van Drunen) is very present later in the book, and seemed a bit forced or out of place. She frequently cites Michael Horton.
All in all, this is a book that I wouldn’t recommend for a small group ladies’ book study in its entirety, though some chapters are particularly well composed and useful.
It is light on polemics, and heavy on personal reflection. At points, Byrd is admirably - if a bit uncomfortably - vulnerable. That being said, too much of the book is intensely personal and autobiographical. I would classify the book as memoir, if it weren’t for her stated aim of resourcing Christian women’s book clubs and discipleship studies. But the book’s heavy autobiographical element does not serve its purpose. In fact, Byrd’s constant use of her own experience to illustrate her points and to drive home her recommendations does a disservice to her stated agenda, weakening the prosecution of the task she has laid out before herself: to offer a popular-level theological women’s resource that stands out from the standard fare available from most Evangelical Christian book publishers. Her purpose would have been more effectively achieved if she had taken a less autobIographical approach in writing the book.
Influences include much good material from twentieth and twenty-first century popular Reformed literature. Having witnessed Byrd’s more recent theological trajectory, I was pleasantly surprised by her positive treatment of complementarianism, and her approving citations of John Piper, John MacArthur, Vodie Baucham, and others. Her exploration of sin was theologically rich, drawing deeply from Jeremiah Burroughs (and Thomas Brooks). The influence of modern Reformed Two Kingdoms (think David Van Drunen) is very present later in the book, and seemed a bit forced or out of place. She frequently cites Michael Horton.
All in all, this is a book that I wouldn’t recommend for a small group ladies’ book study in its entirety, though some chapters are particularly well composed and useful.
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January 24, 2015It's rare that I do not finish a book, and the author surely put much work into writing it, so it seems only right to explain why I simply could not continue with this one, because I don't think it is *bad*, just not for me. As stated previously, the theology seems sound, at least as far as I managed to get (I believe "Penny For Your Thoughts" or some such thing was the last chapter I got to). This might indeed be good for a women's study group (certainly better than, say, Beth Moore or Joyce Meyer), though such "tell us your feeeeeelings! What do YOU think this Bible verse means?" (which the author, God bless her, warns against, though a bit mildly) coffee klatches are not for me.
And that's why this book, too, is not for me; the author's voice is just too...well, girly. As female star of the the week girly (I...don't really know who today's female stars are, so please excuse me for being vague). It is simply too chatty for me. Give me the facts, the stats, the data, and trust me to sort through it. I don't like fluff, I don't like lengthy lead-ins, I don't like meandering, I don't like cutesy, I don't watch romance movies, I don't like "feelings", and I really dislike having my time wasted.
Much of the ground covered in the parts of the book I managed to read I've already covered myself. So very, very little of it was new or groundbreaking to me (sorry). Not everyone is a self-starter (nor am I, some days!), so again, this book may indeed be wonderfully helpful to some—giving them encouragement and some grounds on which to ponder the issues brought up.
Regardless: It's not for me. At all. A quick glimpse at the other books I like may indicate why. If you do not like these authors (some of whom have been referred to as 'dry'), you may well like this book, but if you DO, this book is very likely not for you, either.
There writing style herein is not to my liking, but if you've an interest in the topic, take advantage of some of the 'look inside' features online and decide for yourself.
And that's why this book, too, is not for me; the author's voice is just too...well, girly. As female star of the the week girly (I...don't really know who today's female stars are, so please excuse me for being vague). It is simply too chatty for me. Give me the facts, the stats, the data, and trust me to sort through it. I don't like fluff, I don't like lengthy lead-ins, I don't like meandering, I don't like cutesy, I don't watch romance movies, I don't like "feelings", and I really dislike having my time wasted.
Much of the ground covered in the parts of the book I managed to read I've already covered myself. So very, very little of it was new or groundbreaking to me (sorry). Not everyone is a self-starter (nor am I, some days!), so again, this book may indeed be wonderfully helpful to some—giving them encouragement and some grounds on which to ponder the issues brought up.
Regardless: It's not for me. At all. A quick glimpse at the other books I like may indicate why. If you do not like these authors (some of whom have been referred to as 'dry'), you may well like this book, but if you DO, this book is very likely not for you, either.
There writing style herein is not to my liking, but if you've an interest in the topic, take advantage of some of the 'look inside' features online and decide for yourself.
January 29, 2014
I have to admit that I was disappointed with this book. I was thoroughly enjoying it... until I got to the last few chapters, at which point the author dove into propounding a staunch (though at the same time admittedly confused and muddled) view of two kingdoms theology. I have to give her credit for dealing with the tricky subject of grace and sanctification pretty well. I enjoyed the first part of the book, and would recommend this book (on the whole) up to chapter ten. She has some great chapters and I gleaned lots of tidbits along the way, but I cannot give a full endorsement.
August 27, 2014
Excellent! I appreciate the way Aimee has written an encouraging book to bring women to a diligent study of God's Word to understand the world around us.
One observation: I would have loved if Aimee would have included an appendix with a list of books to read along hers (considering that her book is meant to be studied and discussed over a year). If you are interested, my friend Melissa published an exhaustive companion reading list -with some fiction included- that I highly recommend.
http://www.onequietlife.blogspot.mx/p...
One observation: I would have loved if Aimee would have included an appendix with a list of books to read along hers (considering that her book is meant to be studied and discussed over a year). If you are interested, my friend Melissa published an exhaustive companion reading list -with some fiction included- that I highly recommend.
http://www.onequietlife.blogspot.mx/p...
July 17, 2017
Aimee Byrd never disappoints. Intelligent, thoughtful treatment on the notions of womanhood and loving God with your mind. Definitely not a "pink" or "fluffy" approach of the topics as is, sadly, often the case.
December 16, 2013
All women, disregard the title and cover picture (which I really think was supposed to be ironic or tongue-in-cheek more than anything). This book can be easily applicable to all women, in any state of relationship or career choice. Yes, she does focus on married women, but looking at Scripture there is also a heavy emphasis on married women in the home.
That said, this is a refreshing book that addresses not just the (yawn & eyeroll) "normal" Christian women's issues, but gets down into the grit of doctrine, theology, and the Scriptures on which she forms all her shocking (by today's American evangelical church's standards) stances. Byrd has a very high regard for the church and its sacraments, stresses the importance of doctrine and the right type of church, and puts proper weight on Scripture and the work Christ has done on the cross rather than on us. Byrd is unabashedly reformed with a gender complementarian view and a two kingdoms semi-realized eschatological stance. This may rub many people the wrong way if they are not quite familiar with reformed thinking (heck, even those within the reformed circles can't agree on some of these things), but Byrd has such a natural (and fun) writing style that it's hard to find fault with what she has to say. Then again, as I was reading, I kept saying to myself, "Wow, it's like she's reaching in and grabbing all my random jumbled theological thoughts and laid them out so they make coherent sense now! She could be me, she reads my mind so well."
I got giddy when I realized how well read this woman is (on top of being a mom, wife, household COO, and after holding several various jobs) and how well she melded the theologians with Scripture. Where else are you going to find a book for Christian women that combines nuggets of jewels from Calvin, Boice, Bonhoeffer, and Edwards with the modern "studs" of reformed theology like Horton and VanDrunen? As another of my friends (who recommended it to me) said, "Swoon!"
Some chapters were ho-hum the sort of thing you find in standard fare or in "Recovering Biblical Manhood and Womanhood", nothing new. But several chapters were so well written and thoughtful I fell in love with this book. "Hear Me Roar" and "Here We Stand" were especially meaningful. I felt a few chapters were a bit random and wandering and left me thinking "What is this chapter about again? Where are we going?", but overall she stuck to solid themes in each. I had hoped there was more emphasis on why women were to study doctrine and theology (thus the title?), but she did address it sufficiently, just not in the depth I had hoped. She had a tendency to overuse buzzwords a bit, and the grating overuse of "Housewife Theologian". Yes, it's the title of your book. We get that. But really, give it a rest. We understand what you mean when you say woman or wife. Or maybe I just have an averse reaction to titles and buzzwords.
But I highly recommend this book to all Christian woman in all stages of life and career. A solid 4 stars, best book geared to women out there. A bonus is the reformed view. Great book for women who do not read theology on their own or find Calvin's works great fun-reading.
That said, this is a refreshing book that addresses not just the (yawn & eyeroll) "normal" Christian women's issues, but gets down into the grit of doctrine, theology, and the Scriptures on which she forms all her shocking (by today's American evangelical church's standards) stances. Byrd has a very high regard for the church and its sacraments, stresses the importance of doctrine and the right type of church, and puts proper weight on Scripture and the work Christ has done on the cross rather than on us. Byrd is unabashedly reformed with a gender complementarian view and a two kingdoms semi-realized eschatological stance. This may rub many people the wrong way if they are not quite familiar with reformed thinking (heck, even those within the reformed circles can't agree on some of these things), but Byrd has such a natural (and fun) writing style that it's hard to find fault with what she has to say. Then again, as I was reading, I kept saying to myself, "Wow, it's like she's reaching in and grabbing all my random jumbled theological thoughts and laid them out so they make coherent sense now! She could be me, she reads my mind so well."
I got giddy when I realized how well read this woman is (on top of being a mom, wife, household COO, and after holding several various jobs) and how well she melded the theologians with Scripture. Where else are you going to find a book for Christian women that combines nuggets of jewels from Calvin, Boice, Bonhoeffer, and Edwards with the modern "studs" of reformed theology like Horton and VanDrunen? As another of my friends (who recommended it to me) said, "Swoon!"
Some chapters were ho-hum the sort of thing you find in standard fare or in "Recovering Biblical Manhood and Womanhood", nothing new. But several chapters were so well written and thoughtful I fell in love with this book. "Hear Me Roar" and "Here We Stand" were especially meaningful. I felt a few chapters were a bit random and wandering and left me thinking "What is this chapter about again? Where are we going?", but overall she stuck to solid themes in each. I had hoped there was more emphasis on why women were to study doctrine and theology (thus the title?), but she did address it sufficiently, just not in the depth I had hoped. She had a tendency to overuse buzzwords a bit, and the grating overuse of "Housewife Theologian". Yes, it's the title of your book. We get that. But really, give it a rest. We understand what you mean when you say woman or wife. Or maybe I just have an averse reaction to titles and buzzwords.
But I highly recommend this book to all Christian woman in all stages of life and career. A solid 4 stars, best book geared to women out there. A bonus is the reformed view. Great book for women who do not read theology on their own or find Calvin's works great fun-reading.
July 23, 2015
This book is obviously meant to be read as part of a study, and I think that for that purpose, it is a useful tool. I found myself wanting to discuss the "Journal Questions" with my friends. I didn't love the way that Byrd relied on so many references to other works and sort of took what others had written as proofs. My biggest problem with the book was her chapter dealing with feminism and biblical femininity. Byrd has a skewed view of modern feminism and talks about it as if it puts men down. She also doesn't really explain what biblical femininity IS.
Overall, Housewife Theologian has a lot of good things to say and can be a help to women seeking to flesh out their theology.
Overall, Housewife Theologian has a lot of good things to say and can be a help to women seeking to flesh out their theology.
January 22, 2014
I enjoyed the first half, but she lost me in the second. Understanding that her view on some theology differs then mine makes me appreciate the time that she spent explaining some of the topics. But some of the vocabulary in the book went right over my head. I can wholeheartedly agree with her that as a woman, as a wife, as a mom, and a believer, I need to dig into my bible, and understand the importance of it.
September 25, 2020
This book has good points and bad points. Besides its offputting title (even if you aren't a housewife, this is a book for all women) you can get something from it. It's a very encouraging book for women to spend time in the Bible learning and growing.
Other than that, it's not really anything we haven't heard before in so many different ways.
I voluntarily reviewed a complimentary copy.
Other than that, it's not really anything we haven't heard before in so many different ways.
I voluntarily reviewed a complimentary copy.
February 28, 2019
Great insights and inspiration, convicting. Mostly a broadly reformed perspective. Great commentary on unity and the importance of stating our theology and doctrinal beliefs. Only a few instances of contention for me: outright dismissal of reconstructionism a number of times. Seems like it is a bit of a vendetta as I did not expect to find such a staunch opinion on this topic in the book. Also infers that as a Presbyterian she is “closer to the center” of biblically correct doctrine as opposed to a Baptist.
October 23, 2017
Excellent book but not as challenging for me as I had hoped. But still good review and encouragement to keep on keeping on. I put it down after Chapter 5 for a few weeks but was go glad to have picked it back up to finish it. Chapter 9 brings up forgiveness and she has a superb, almost poetic, illustration of forgiveness to truly pray about. As something I am currently wrestling with- it was pointed right to my heart and has been wonderful to ruminate over these past days.
March 31, 2021
I LOVED this book. The Gospel really does change everything and the way we think about everything and how we live our lives. As housewives we should be students of God's Word and grounded in Biblical theology. Let God's truths change your everday life!
June 12, 2019
A few years ago a friend of mine texted me a picture of the cover of this book. I scoffed and we had a good laugh about it. I didn't know who Aimee Byrd was at the time and now, a few years later, I can admit that my assumptions about the book were wrong and unfair.
I'm (now) a fan of Aimee Byrd; I listen to her on the Mortification of Spin podcast and her guest appearances on Theology Gals. The only reason I read this book though was because another friend passed it on to me after she read it and was encouraged. I honestly wouldn't have read the book otherwise but I'm glad I did.
I admire how smart, level headed, and balanced Aimee Byrd is. One of the first things she does in this book is reclaim the term "housewife," after recognizing the stigma and baggage that has become associated with it. This book was helpful for me in considering all the many facets of who I am as a woman (beauty, sexuality, friendships, hospitality, corporate worship, etc). The discussion questions at the end of each chapter were incredibly insightful. I kind of wished I was reading the book with someone because those questions were deep and would definitely lead to some great conversation, I'm sure.
Favorite quotes:
"Helper...the word help suggests that the man has governmental priority, but both sexes are mutually dependent on each other....this word signifies the woman's essential contribution, not inadequacy." [necessary ally]
"Cultural Mandate...create cultures, build civilizations."
"God has created us in diversity, which is part of our beauty."
"A good leader needs good help. This good help is not someone who is going to constantly try to usurp his authority, but rather someone who shares his vision and can be trusted to operate accordingly."
"One important way for me to be a good helper is to make sure that I am not just serving myself in my strong opinions, and to always have a respectful disposition...I am not just submitting to my husband, I am submitting to Christ."
"Whenever I decide to do anything, I should be thinking of how this represents my husband and questioning if he would approve. And he trusts me to do this." [and our husbands should be thinking the same way]
"When you admire a pleasing face, it's God's excellence of artistry that you are admiring. I love that the definition [of beauty] includes truthfulness and originality. Beauty goes hand in hand with purity."
"Our ultimate authority is God. The Bible tells us to be submissive to our husbands and yet we are still responsible before the Lord to obey his Word."
"There is a flow to history and culture. This flow is rooted and has its wellspring in the thoughts of people. People are unique in the inner life of the mind - what they are in their thought world determines how they act. This is true of their value systems and it is true of their creativity. It is true of their corporate actions, such as political decisions, and it is true of their personal lives. The result of their thought world flows from their fingers or from their tongues into the external world." AB quoting Francis Schaeffer
"Christ is beautifying his bride, preparing us for that glorious day. Suddenly the hours and months that we spend to be beautiful brides for our wedding days here seem small and trivial in comparison to the lifetime our Groom is spending on our sanctification."
"You do not make the truth. You reside in the truth." AB quoting Harry Blamires
"Because God created us in His image, to function in His world, there is a 'continuity of categories' between God's mind, our minds, and the structure of the world...we are responsible for our own learning."
"Are we not partaking in a bit of an eschatological interruption on Sunday mornings, reminding ourselves of what is really real?"
"I am a Christian because it's true....Christianity explains the actual reality of the world, and therefore unbelievers living in accordance with their own ideologies - whatever those may be - have a very hard time because they are attempting to do this in God's world, which functions according to his will and plan, not theirs."
"The false dichotomy set up is that if you do not accept someone else's 'truth' you are considered contentious. There is fragile tension between valuing a person and his opinions without necessarily accepting those opinions as convincing."
"The church is the means by which we are to worship corporately, grow spiritually, serve sacrificially, and be fed scripturally."
"The truly unique are those who are just pursuing truth."
"The principal runs through all life from top to bottom. Give up yourself, and you will find your real self. Lose your life, and you will save it. Submit to death, death of your ambitions and favorite wishes every day and death of your whole body in the end...and you will find eternal life. Keep back nothing. Nothing that you have not given away will really be yours. Nothing in you that has not died will ever be raised from the dead. Look for yourself, and you will find in the long run only hatred, loneliness, despair, rage, ruin, and decay. But look for Christ and you will find Him, and with Him everything else thrown in." AB quoting C.S. Lewis
"...it is up to us women to receive the given as Mary did, not to insist on the not-given as Eve did."
"...don't let our culture tell you who to be or how to be sexual."
"Discernment...means to separate things from one another at their points of difference in order to distinguish them...when we engage in discernment we attempt to use God's Word to rise above our own limitations so we can see as God sees."
"When God effectually calls us...the gospel bears the reality of this historical-redemptive drama, including us in its context, the covenant."
"Our homemaking is a vocation, making a culture within our family living space, transforming it into a home. Hospitality is inviting others into our home, sharing our culture in service."
"When we are alone with our families, we need to treat them as the important people they are. Candles and music, or a clean house, don't have to be only for company."
"...our sphere of influence is the 'collection box' in which we serve and to which we contribute."
"Much of our sin can be summed up in the word autonomy."
"Weeds...they mock beauty while they feed on its nutrients."
"God's means for transforming us into the likeness of his Son are within the perimeters of our covenant community."
"...fallen people run from God. We run from God and we chase something else [idols]."
"...making these good things into ultimate things as I became a slave to them, making my happiness dependent on keeping these idols."
"How does God convey to us Christ and all his benefits as we live as sojourners in this world? Answer: he gives us Sunday...we need the covenant renewal ceremony that we are given each Sabbath day."
"In worship, we actually experience the future interrupting the present."
"Created by speech, upheld by speech, and one day glorified by speech, we are, like the rest of creation, summoned beings, not autonomous. We exist because we have been spoken into existence, and we persist in time because the Spirit ensures that the Father's speaking, in the Son, will not return void." AB quoting Michael Horton
"I am to be as salt and light to my neighbors, as I enjoy the good alongside of them."
"Slapping a Christian label on an activity does not sanctify it in any way - it is still common."
"...if our 'dreams' are the most important priority in our lives, then we will compromise our very character in order to chase after them."
I'm (now) a fan of Aimee Byrd; I listen to her on the Mortification of Spin podcast and her guest appearances on Theology Gals. The only reason I read this book though was because another friend passed it on to me after she read it and was encouraged. I honestly wouldn't have read the book otherwise but I'm glad I did.
I admire how smart, level headed, and balanced Aimee Byrd is. One of the first things she does in this book is reclaim the term "housewife," after recognizing the stigma and baggage that has become associated with it. This book was helpful for me in considering all the many facets of who I am as a woman (beauty, sexuality, friendships, hospitality, corporate worship, etc). The discussion questions at the end of each chapter were incredibly insightful. I kind of wished I was reading the book with someone because those questions were deep and would definitely lead to some great conversation, I'm sure.
Favorite quotes:
"Helper...the word help suggests that the man has governmental priority, but both sexes are mutually dependent on each other....this word signifies the woman's essential contribution, not inadequacy." [necessary ally]
"Cultural Mandate...create cultures, build civilizations."
"God has created us in diversity, which is part of our beauty."
"A good leader needs good help. This good help is not someone who is going to constantly try to usurp his authority, but rather someone who shares his vision and can be trusted to operate accordingly."
"One important way for me to be a good helper is to make sure that I am not just serving myself in my strong opinions, and to always have a respectful disposition...I am not just submitting to my husband, I am submitting to Christ."
"Whenever I decide to do anything, I should be thinking of how this represents my husband and questioning if he would approve. And he trusts me to do this." [and our husbands should be thinking the same way]
"When you admire a pleasing face, it's God's excellence of artistry that you are admiring. I love that the definition [of beauty] includes truthfulness and originality. Beauty goes hand in hand with purity."
"Our ultimate authority is God. The Bible tells us to be submissive to our husbands and yet we are still responsible before the Lord to obey his Word."
"There is a flow to history and culture. This flow is rooted and has its wellspring in the thoughts of people. People are unique in the inner life of the mind - what they are in their thought world determines how they act. This is true of their value systems and it is true of their creativity. It is true of their corporate actions, such as political decisions, and it is true of their personal lives. The result of their thought world flows from their fingers or from their tongues into the external world." AB quoting Francis Schaeffer
"Christ is beautifying his bride, preparing us for that glorious day. Suddenly the hours and months that we spend to be beautiful brides for our wedding days here seem small and trivial in comparison to the lifetime our Groom is spending on our sanctification."
"You do not make the truth. You reside in the truth." AB quoting Harry Blamires
"Because God created us in His image, to function in His world, there is a 'continuity of categories' between God's mind, our minds, and the structure of the world...we are responsible for our own learning."
"Are we not partaking in a bit of an eschatological interruption on Sunday mornings, reminding ourselves of what is really real?"
"I am a Christian because it's true....Christianity explains the actual reality of the world, and therefore unbelievers living in accordance with their own ideologies - whatever those may be - have a very hard time because they are attempting to do this in God's world, which functions according to his will and plan, not theirs."
"The false dichotomy set up is that if you do not accept someone else's 'truth' you are considered contentious. There is fragile tension between valuing a person and his opinions without necessarily accepting those opinions as convincing."
"The church is the means by which we are to worship corporately, grow spiritually, serve sacrificially, and be fed scripturally."
"The truly unique are those who are just pursuing truth."
"The principal runs through all life from top to bottom. Give up yourself, and you will find your real self. Lose your life, and you will save it. Submit to death, death of your ambitions and favorite wishes every day and death of your whole body in the end...and you will find eternal life. Keep back nothing. Nothing that you have not given away will really be yours. Nothing in you that has not died will ever be raised from the dead. Look for yourself, and you will find in the long run only hatred, loneliness, despair, rage, ruin, and decay. But look for Christ and you will find Him, and with Him everything else thrown in." AB quoting C.S. Lewis
"...it is up to us women to receive the given as Mary did, not to insist on the not-given as Eve did."
"...don't let our culture tell you who to be or how to be sexual."
"Discernment...means to separate things from one another at their points of difference in order to distinguish them...when we engage in discernment we attempt to use God's Word to rise above our own limitations so we can see as God sees."
"When God effectually calls us...the gospel bears the reality of this historical-redemptive drama, including us in its context, the covenant."
"Our homemaking is a vocation, making a culture within our family living space, transforming it into a home. Hospitality is inviting others into our home, sharing our culture in service."
"When we are alone with our families, we need to treat them as the important people they are. Candles and music, or a clean house, don't have to be only for company."
"...our sphere of influence is the 'collection box' in which we serve and to which we contribute."
"Much of our sin can be summed up in the word autonomy."
"Weeds...they mock beauty while they feed on its nutrients."
"God's means for transforming us into the likeness of his Son are within the perimeters of our covenant community."
"...fallen people run from God. We run from God and we chase something else [idols]."
"...making these good things into ultimate things as I became a slave to them, making my happiness dependent on keeping these idols."
"How does God convey to us Christ and all his benefits as we live as sojourners in this world? Answer: he gives us Sunday...we need the covenant renewal ceremony that we are given each Sabbath day."
"In worship, we actually experience the future interrupting the present."
"Created by speech, upheld by speech, and one day glorified by speech, we are, like the rest of creation, summoned beings, not autonomous. We exist because we have been spoken into existence, and we persist in time because the Spirit ensures that the Father's speaking, in the Son, will not return void." AB quoting Michael Horton
"I am to be as salt and light to my neighbors, as I enjoy the good alongside of them."
"Slapping a Christian label on an activity does not sanctify it in any way - it is still common."
"...if our 'dreams' are the most important priority in our lives, then we will compromise our very character in order to chase after them."
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February 10, 2022Some quotes I especially liked:
"...we housewife theologians may think of ourselves as the humblest sources. Our vocation is not glorious. But we all have a circle of people in our lives whom we are influencing and teaching, whether the information we offer them is good or bad. We are in a position of power, and we need to look at it in this way."
"... we need to make a purposeful effort in defining our community. Whatever position in life God has providentially placed you in is where you are called to serve."
" Her circumstances did not determine her behavior, her desire did. And that was a desire for the truth. She sought out good teaching and studied it. Think about how limited her resources must have been in that period of time."
"... be thinking about who is influencing you, and what you are being taught."
" So many times in my own life, I think I’ve picked some troublesome sin, only to find that I didn’t remove its root. I had only plucked it."
"Thomas Brooks explains the craftiness of Satan in decorating sin to appear as a virtue: 'Pride, he presents to the soul under the name and notion of neatness and cleanliness, and covetousness (which the apostle condemns for idolatry) to be but good husbandry [‘thrift’, ‘economy’]; and drunkenness to be good fellowship, and riotousness under the name and notion of liberality, and wantonness as a trick of youth.' "
"... if our “dreams” are the most important priority in our lives, then we will compromise our very character in order to chase after them."
"...we housewife theologians may think of ourselves as the humblest sources. Our vocation is not glorious. But we all have a circle of people in our lives whom we are influencing and teaching, whether the information we offer them is good or bad. We are in a position of power, and we need to look at it in this way."
"... we need to make a purposeful effort in defining our community. Whatever position in life God has providentially placed you in is where you are called to serve."
" Her circumstances did not determine her behavior, her desire did. And that was a desire for the truth. She sought out good teaching and studied it. Think about how limited her resources must have been in that period of time."
"... be thinking about who is influencing you, and what you are being taught."
" So many times in my own life, I think I’ve picked some troublesome sin, only to find that I didn’t remove its root. I had only plucked it."
"Thomas Brooks explains the craftiness of Satan in decorating sin to appear as a virtue: 'Pride, he presents to the soul under the name and notion of neatness and cleanliness, and covetousness (which the apostle condemns for idolatry) to be but good husbandry [‘thrift’, ‘economy’]; and drunkenness to be good fellowship, and riotousness under the name and notion of liberality, and wantonness as a trick of youth.' "
"... if our “dreams” are the most important priority in our lives, then we will compromise our very character in order to chase after them."
Read
April 6, 2017I need to take a break on this one after the recent controversy with the mortification of spin, of which Aimee Byrd is a member, and their attack on the women of the Truth's table podcast. I find it difficult to read her words encouraging women to be theologically astute when women of high theological training could be so mercilessly attacked for expressing an opinion about women being given value (not ordained position) within the church. Though Aimee wasn't the perpetrator of the attack, she has so far stayed silent, allowing a man on the same forum to continue to exhibit Pharisaical judgement on these women without biblical foundation or respectful communication. He essentially became an exhibit A to the very words on the podcast he rails against. Did I mention these women are also black? It grieves my spirit as a reformed white Christian woman. At least for now, I can't abide by Byrd's words here when she can not support her sisters in Christ to be treated with dignity, even in disagreement, against her colleague with whom she would have great influence.
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December 1, 2013I read about half of this. And it wasn't bad writing or a bad book, but I was not the intended audience. I picked it up because I thought I might get something out of it. I am an armchair theologian, I went to seminary and work with churches but have never served as a pastor.
I am also a new stay at home dad after having been the full time nanny for my two nieces for five years. So even though I am male, I thought my interest in theology and my stay at home parent status would do more to draw me in. But I am not a complimentarian female, I am an egalitarian male and therefore I disagreed with a lot of the basis of the book.
I am also not reformed and while I appreciate knowing the perspectives of the author, this book as well as several others really have put me off by putting all of their theological biases up front without giving me any of the reasons why I want to sift through them. (My same problem with Lit! by Tony Reinke.)
I am also a new stay at home dad after having been the full time nanny for my two nieces for five years. So even though I am male, I thought my interest in theology and my stay at home parent status would do more to draw me in. But I am not a complimentarian female, I am an egalitarian male and therefore I disagreed with a lot of the basis of the book.
I am also not reformed and while I appreciate knowing the perspectives of the author, this book as well as several others really have put me off by putting all of their theological biases up front without giving me any of the reasons why I want to sift through them. (My same problem with Lit! by Tony Reinke.)
December 18, 2013
This is one of those books so filled with insight and encouragment it needs to be read more than once or twice. I suggest it to any woman regardless your martied status as an encouragement. It came at a time in my life when I had just become a homemaker myself and was being challanged to value theology more. Excellent, helpful, encouraging and fun!
June 27, 2015
This book was excellent! There was a lot of good insight & Aimee Byrd explained some things that I hadn't previously understood. I was reminded of how important it is to know theology as a mom and a youth group leader. I highly recommend this (not just for "housewives" ;)
February 19, 2022
Aimee Byrd has some great thoughts throughout her book and I enjoyed reading the book until I neared the end. As women, we are influencing those in our community. We should not abandon theological study because most of our time is spent in the home. (Book is directed towards housewives per the title). I particularly enjoyed a thought she had on forgiveness.
However, as the book was coming to an end she began to discuss two kingdom theology. Some of her words I agree with, slapping a Christian title on something doesn’t necessarily make it more godly. However, she writes, “God doesn’t equip Christian’s for cultural work any better than their unbelieving neighbors.” Perhaps this statement doesn’t settle well with me because I do not separate spiritual work from that of cultural work and do believe that through all my work the Holy Spirit is equipping me.
She addresses the benefits and disadvantages to each educational model, homeschool, public school, and Christian private school. She writes, “When it comes to theology, that is the church’s responsibility.” She mentions how algebra can not be learned from scripture and goes on to write, “ The church does not have the jurisdiction to teach narrower forms of academia from the pulpit. The civil world has the chief responsibility for teaching what falls under natural revelation.” She later goes on to write, “Christian schools need to be mindful not to usurp the church’s responsibilities as their own. As ministers should hesitate to instruct about mathematics from the pulpit, so (Christian private school) mathematic teachers should hesitate to instruct about missions and prayers in their schools.”
For stating that she doesn’t believe we should compartmentalize our Christianity, the end of the book leaves me feeling like it’s being compartmentalized. The Church teaches theology, the world teaches what is not revealed in scripture, and the family…? What am I to teach? Am I only learning theology so the community can see the gospel through me as I engage with others?
Had this book ended around chapter 10, I would have rated it higher.
My thoughts- Women should be studying scripture and understand theology. We are instructing our kids and it is our responsibility to train up our children in the way they should go and to nurture them in the discipline and instruction of the Lord. Women can only do this well if they know the Lord, the Word, and understand theology well. Sure, my community benefits from my Christianity and hospitality but my family and the disciples I’m raising in my home will benefit more.
However, as the book was coming to an end she began to discuss two kingdom theology. Some of her words I agree with, slapping a Christian title on something doesn’t necessarily make it more godly. However, she writes, “God doesn’t equip Christian’s for cultural work any better than their unbelieving neighbors.” Perhaps this statement doesn’t settle well with me because I do not separate spiritual work from that of cultural work and do believe that through all my work the Holy Spirit is equipping me.
She addresses the benefits and disadvantages to each educational model, homeschool, public school, and Christian private school. She writes, “When it comes to theology, that is the church’s responsibility.” She mentions how algebra can not be learned from scripture and goes on to write, “ The church does not have the jurisdiction to teach narrower forms of academia from the pulpit. The civil world has the chief responsibility for teaching what falls under natural revelation.” She later goes on to write, “Christian schools need to be mindful not to usurp the church’s responsibilities as their own. As ministers should hesitate to instruct about mathematics from the pulpit, so (Christian private school) mathematic teachers should hesitate to instruct about missions and prayers in their schools.”
For stating that she doesn’t believe we should compartmentalize our Christianity, the end of the book leaves me feeling like it’s being compartmentalized. The Church teaches theology, the world teaches what is not revealed in scripture, and the family…? What am I to teach? Am I only learning theology so the community can see the gospel through me as I engage with others?
Had this book ended around chapter 10, I would have rated it higher.
My thoughts- Women should be studying scripture and understand theology. We are instructing our kids and it is our responsibility to train up our children in the way they should go and to nurture them in the discipline and instruction of the Lord. Women can only do this well if they know the Lord, the Word, and understand theology well. Sure, my community benefits from my Christianity and hospitality but my family and the disciples I’m raising in my home will benefit more.
November 4, 2017
I was incredibly helped and encouraged by this book. This book is intended as a journal to either be used in a women's study group or as an independent study. I read it independently, but I think I would benefit greatly from a group discussion as well. And I absolutely loved the discussion questions at the end of each chapter.
The first few chapters helped solidify my biblical understanding of my role as a wife/mother/daughter/etc. I love Aimee Byrd's passion as she encourages her readers to live for the Lord in any vocation that they may hold. Personally, as a stay-at-home mom of 2 very young daughters and the wife of a PhD Fellow, my days can seem like a lonely struggle. It helps to remind myself that in any chore or mundane-seeming activity, I can do it cheerfully as unto the Lord. The latter chapters were educational and convicting. I know I have a pride issue that keeps me from being hospitable, and I know that I need to be more neighborly. Throughout, Aimee did a fantastic job lovingly speaking truth. (I wish I had that talent!) And I was pleased to see that her biblical citations were correct as well as appropriately applied for the illustrations she used (not common in much of today's "Christian" literature, unfortunately).
As with many books related to Christian theology, there will be some non-essential doctrines that different individuals disagree on, and that is okay. I recently learned the concept of "binding another's conscience" in terms of setting standards of "Christian living" as if they where from God, Himself (i.e. placing your personal convictions in regards to reading material, music, television/movies, what business you can/cannot support, etc... onto other individuals). These standards will not be expressly stated in Scripture ("Thou shalt not read X" or "Thou shalt not shop at Y") in such finite terms. Having a personal conviction of your own is between you and the Holy Spirit, and if it's not stated is Scripture, it is not your responsibility or Christian duty to bind another's conscience. (Something I was tempted to do when Aimee started talking about secular music and the like 😅)
All that to say: This is a wonderful tool for individual reading, and I'm sure it would be beneficial to a group discussion setting as well. Thank you, Aimee 💕 I'm indebted to you forever.
The first few chapters helped solidify my biblical understanding of my role as a wife/mother/daughter/etc. I love Aimee Byrd's passion as she encourages her readers to live for the Lord in any vocation that they may hold. Personally, as a stay-at-home mom of 2 very young daughters and the wife of a PhD Fellow, my days can seem like a lonely struggle. It helps to remind myself that in any chore or mundane-seeming activity, I can do it cheerfully as unto the Lord. The latter chapters were educational and convicting. I know I have a pride issue that keeps me from being hospitable, and I know that I need to be more neighborly. Throughout, Aimee did a fantastic job lovingly speaking truth. (I wish I had that talent!) And I was pleased to see that her biblical citations were correct as well as appropriately applied for the illustrations she used (not common in much of today's "Christian" literature, unfortunately).
As with many books related to Christian theology, there will be some non-essential doctrines that different individuals disagree on, and that is okay. I recently learned the concept of "binding another's conscience" in terms of setting standards of "Christian living" as if they where from God, Himself (i.e. placing your personal convictions in regards to reading material, music, television/movies, what business you can/cannot support, etc... onto other individuals). These standards will not be expressly stated in Scripture ("Thou shalt not read X" or "Thou shalt not shop at Y") in such finite terms. Having a personal conviction of your own is between you and the Holy Spirit, and if it's not stated is Scripture, it is not your responsibility or Christian duty to bind another's conscience. (Something I was tempted to do when Aimee started talking about secular music and the like 😅)
All that to say: This is a wonderful tool for individual reading, and I'm sure it would be beneficial to a group discussion setting as well. Thank you, Aimee 💕 I'm indebted to you forever.
February 22, 2021
I had never read anything by Aimee Byrd before, and hadn't heard of her. I became aware through the Geneva Commons controversy. I thought I had better get more familiar.
I'm not the target audience for the book. The back cover says this is a book for women. However, I am an elder in a reformed church and wanted to see for myself what the teaching was. I didn't find much of concern in most of the book. As far as I can see, much of it aligns with a biblical understanding of the role of men and women. I plan to read more of her work to see how the ideas progress. The one thing that was concerning and should probably be read with discernment are two of the later chapters in the book that advocate for two kingdom theology. I'm not thoroughly read up on 2k theology, however, just some of what she writes is not in alignment with the Westminster Confession in chapter 23 on the role of government.
Besides that the book seems to lose focus near the end and does not come together as a cohesive whole, the 2k theology is out of place in the book, and doesn't fit with the goal of the book. She does admit the time and difficulties of putting this first book together, taking more than 3 years on and off, and juggling it between other primary responsibilities. I wouldn't recommend it without reservation, but there are some positive things to pull from it.
I'm not the target audience for the book. The back cover says this is a book for women. However, I am an elder in a reformed church and wanted to see for myself what the teaching was. I didn't find much of concern in most of the book. As far as I can see, much of it aligns with a biblical understanding of the role of men and women. I plan to read more of her work to see how the ideas progress. The one thing that was concerning and should probably be read with discernment are two of the later chapters in the book that advocate for two kingdom theology. I'm not thoroughly read up on 2k theology, however, just some of what she writes is not in alignment with the Westminster Confession in chapter 23 on the role of government.
Besides that the book seems to lose focus near the end and does not come together as a cohesive whole, the 2k theology is out of place in the book, and doesn't fit with the goal of the book. She does admit the time and difficulties of putting this first book together, taking more than 3 years on and off, and juggling it between other primary responsibilities. I wouldn't recommend it without reservation, but there are some positive things to pull from it.
May 5, 2023
After a decade on my bookshelf, I’m glad to finally have read this one. It’s not fluffy read. There is depth to every thought and even though Byrd trails off frequently, it’s interesting and thought provoking. I did find it lacking in fulfilling the subtitle “How the Gospel Interrupts the Ordinary.” I didn’t think the ordinary, everyday, mundane tasks of a housewife were in focus at all, and were very underdeveloped in every way. I think this was a cathartic writing experience for her, but doesn’t offer what it promises. But this book does offer something different that others in the genre.
July 23, 2024
While this isn't the sort of book I am drawn to, I listened to a friend's recommendation. Unfortunately, this book is what I expected. Certainly, there were moments of wisdom and clarity. However, most of the time those moments were ruined by clunky writing, a perspective that only takes into account the author's experience, and some questionable theology. I appreciate the sentiment and purpose of the book, but it did not deliver. I hope that her following books have a broader perspective and a better editor.
July 7, 2025
I am very clear not the intended audience for this book. But after reading Recovering from Biblical Manhood and Womanhood I wanted to read more of Byrd's work and where she comes from. It took me a few years, but I did it.
Housewife Theologian strikes be as a set of basic interpretations thoughtfully put together. I cannot see that any traditionally conservative evangelical Christian (especially one leaning a wee but Reformed) could fail to support Byrd's arguments.
I'm glad that I read this book.
Housewife Theologian strikes be as a set of basic interpretations thoughtfully put together. I cannot see that any traditionally conservative evangelical Christian (especially one leaning a wee but Reformed) could fail to support Byrd's arguments.
I'm glad that I read this book.
August 20, 2021
Not your typical book on being a wife. No call to attain the unattainable Proverbs 31 status. No list of rules that makes you feel like a failure. But rather gospel truth about women and their place in the home, church, and society.
While I do recommend reading with discretion, this books is far better than a lot of books geared toward Christian wives that leave them as second class citizens in the kingdom of God. We need more writers like this.
While I do recommend reading with discretion, this books is far better than a lot of books geared toward Christian wives that leave them as second class citizens in the kingdom of God. We need more writers like this.
March 30, 2017
A very clear presentation on why theology is important for all women in all walks of life, and how it helps us view the world we live in and our day to day lives.
Not just for housewives!
Great to do with other women you know. It includes thought-provoking journaling questions which would make for great discussion with others.
Not just for housewives!
Great to do with other women you know. It includes thought-provoking journaling questions which would make for great discussion with others.
June 23, 2020
I finally read this. It has some solid chapters. Especially the chapter Girl Interrupted on idols and forgiveness. Can't recommend the last few chapters because I do not believe two kingdoms theology to be very helpful.
This would be great for a woman's group to encourage them that they can be theologians every bit as much as men.
This would be great for a woman's group to encourage them that they can be theologians every bit as much as men.
February 10, 2021
I don’t prefer non-fiction, but I challenged myself to read this since the title really spoke to me. Not all chapters were 5 star, but it was well researched, and despite the daunting use of “theologian” in the title, it was well written and not incredibly dense. I was both enlightened and convicted while reading Aimee’s work.
January 5, 2020
This book is like most any other Biblical womanhood book, in that I didn’t really think it better or worse than most the stuff out there and hits about all the same points. There was a lack of scriptural reference which I disliked.
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