The Chicken Qabalah of Rabbi Lamed Ben Clifford: Dilettante's Guide to What You Do and Do Not Need to Know to Become a Qabalist

by Lon Milo DuQuette

A unique and humorous and also practical approach to the increasingly popular study of Qabalah. This is a seriously funny book! Traditional Qabalistic (or Cabalistic, or, indeed, Kabbalistic read this book to find out what the difference is...we know you've always wondered) sources tend to be a bit, er, dry. DuQuette spices up the Qabalah and makes it come alive, restoring the joy of learning the fundamentals of this admittedly arcane system by using simple, amusing anecdotes and metaphors. This account, written psuedepigraphically (fictitiously attributed to a supposed authority), allows DuQuette as Rabbi Lamed Ben Clifford to soar to outrageous heights and, when necessary, stand apart from the silliness to highlight the golden eggs of Qabalistic wisdom nested therein. Sure to be a revelation to those who think that learning about the Qabalah needs to be tedious and serious, DuQuette shows that great truths can be transmitted through the medium of laughter. It's s Dilettante's Guide to What You Do and Do Not Need to Know to Become a Qabalist.

Genres: Occult, Magick, Nonfiction, Spirituality, Religion, Esoterica, Magic

242 pages, Kindle Edition

First published August 1, 2001

About the author

Lon Milo DuQuette is an American singer-song writer, author, lecturer, and occultist, best known as an author who applies humor in the field of Western Hermeticism.

Born in Long Beach, California and raised in Columbus, Nebraska, he was an aspiring studio musician and recording artist in the 1970s, releasing two singles and an album, Charley D. and Milo, on the Epic Records label.

He married to his high school sweetheart, Constance Jean Duquette. They live in Costa Mesa, California and have one son, Jean-Paul.

Since 1975 he has been a National and International governing officer of Ordo Templi Orientis, a religious and fraternal organization founded in the early part of the 20th century. Since 1996 he has been the O.T.O.'s United States Deputy Grand Master and one of the most visible members of the Order. He is also an Archbishop of Ecclesia Gnostica Catholica, the ecclesiastical arm of O.T.O.

Reviews

[Victoria Evangelina Allen · Rating 4 out of 5]

~HELL, NO!~

DuQuette's cute masterpiece was the first book on Qabalah I read. I read the book attentively and even highlighted the phrases I thought to be useful for later work. Well... I have NO idea what Qabalah is and how to use it. Should I be upset about it? Hell, no! I am a Chicken Qabalist!!!

I will share with you the two Highly Profound Thoughts that stumble into my head while I was reading this book (I am sure they simply got lost on their way to Rabbi Lamed Ben Clifford's mind, but you know what... let's not worry about it, after all he and I are Chicken Qabalists!!):

1. Everything is Sacred, everything contains the ultimate sense, everything is the ONE.

2. Be what you are and do what pleases you: you are here exactly for that reason. Do not compare yourself, but live the life that pleases YOU and once you have the ingredients together something that is greater than the parts emerge and you will be surrounded with people who treasure the YOU that you are, and who will need exactly what you have to offer. Basically, "build it, and they will come."

"The Qabalah doesn't enable me to merely interpret what somebody else meant to say; it forces me to hear what I need to hear! Each time I make another connection on paper, I am creating a new connection in my head (or perhaps reattaching a connection that was disconnected from heads of our ancestors vast ages ago), and I am one step nearer to the realization that everything in Heaven and Earth is connected to everything in Heaven and Earth." (p.186)

"Gods, archangels, angels, spirits, intelligences, and demons are personifications of all our abilities and potential abilities - a wondrous hierarchy of consciousness that represents the subdivisions of our own soul." (p.130)

Since I did not know what I needed to learn about Qabalah and what exactly it was, I could not figure out if the writer was making too much fun, or if the descriptions were much too simplified or if it was even worth wasting time trying to finish this book (which reads more like a short O'Henry story than a "study" manual) but in the end it all, magically, came together. I did not have a clear and loud "A-HA!" moment (do I care about it? Hell, no! I am a Chicken Qabalist!!) but I did get more light onto the question of what Qabalah is, what is "inside" of it, and, most important HOW TO use a trick or to to enhance my own life and lives of people who turn to me for friendship, help, advice, support: you name it. AND I learned a new way to uncover messages from above, be it in the repeating numbers I meet through the day, in a phrase that is stuck in my mind or in the additional layer I can, with some practice, put out of any Tarot spread.

For me, the whole book was a prelude to the Chapter 9 The Chicken Tarot and Holy Guardian Angel, an astonishingly practical view on how to "place" all the cards in your head and how to use Qabalah, Astrology, timing, magic: you NAME IT! - in your Tarot readings. And once again, the last chapter, on the numbers-letters and other Qabalistic "games" is an awesome how-to guide on getting Divine messages every moment of your existence.

I five this book 4 Stars only because I feel that Lon Milo DuQuette could have put so, so, so much more into it. I feel like he has uncovered a tiny look-through hole in the fence between me and the rest of the World. I wish he showed me where the door is :) But then, as Rabbi Lamed Ben Clifford said, "I've worked hard to gain enlightenment just so you won't have to" (p.149) Oh, well...

Does DuQuette, the author, care that I gave the book 4 out of 5 stars? Hell, no! He is the Chicken Qabalist!!!

Victoria Evangelina Belyavskaya

PS I cannot leave without assuring you that if you ever wanted to learn Hebrew Alphabet: how to write letters and their meanings, the guide in the book is THE solution to your quest. It is so easy that after reading it once I may not remember the names of the letters yet, but I will never confuse Gimel and Nun, for example, for my eyes have been trained to see the subtle difference.

PPS you HAVE TO learn Hebrew Alphabet to apply Qabalah knowledge in Tarot and every-moment-everywhere-divine-message-readings!

[Stefan Emunds · Rating 5 out of 5]

Excellent book. Books on Qabalah get easily nerdy, but this one is kept simple. I recommend it to any newbie. It's also funny. You can read some hilarious parodies on nerdy Qabalists. Haven't laughed that well for a long time.

[Mack · Rating 4 out of 5]

I’ve been meaning to get around to figuring out just what the hell the Qabalah is for years now. I really don’t think I could’ve found a better introduction. It feels like the Hitchhiker’s Guide to Jewish Mysticism—at turns absurd and insightful. It’s also just astonishing to me how nearly every mystical tradition, no matter where it crops up in the world or from which religious or cultural edifice, reaches the same conclusions about reality and our place in it. DuQuette also does a pretty good job of showing how Qabalism intersects with other western occult traditions. I found myself more interested in the Qabalah proper than in these connections, but it’s worth noting that’s a big part of the book. It’s not an exhaustive resource but it’s definitely an accessible one.

[Linda Walters · Rating 5 out of 5]

First, a disclaimer - I am a bona fide graduate of ZIPY and have studied under the good Rabbi. That said, this is the most approachable, and understandable introduction to one of the most complex areas of all Western Hermeticism.

[Aaron Schafer · Rating 5 out of 5]

The hands down, best Qabalah book out there. If you would like to have a clear understanding of the concepts of Qabalah then read this book. There's none of the confusing, word heavy, Elizabethan language to be found here, it's just real experience laid out in a plain and easy to understand fashion. Thanks Lon for another gem!

[James Madsen · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is a hilarious tongue-in-cheek book that can be read at that level but that hides the deceptively simple truth (well, maybe it's a truth!) that if you study a single part of the universe deeply enough, you understand the universe itself. Whatever you think of this, it's a fun read!

[Chris · Rating 5 out of 5]

Perfect for beginners. Even if you're not a beginner, some things come into perspective in this little ridiculous book, and one can still learn a couple things. Highly recommended if one is interested in Hermetic Qabalah and doesn't know where to start.

[Tom · Rating 4 out of 5]

A light-hearted and easily accessible work investigating the occult tradition of Qabalah, looks at the tree of life and other mystical traditions that characterise this belief system. An interesting investigation of mysticism and its practice.

[Amy Vaccaro · Rating 5 out of 5]

To say this book lit a few lightbulbs for me would be an extreme understatement. More like a Tesla coil going off in my brain. I cannot believe how many dots were connected for me in this book. Wow. I need to reread immediately.

[The Spiritualist · Rating 5 out of 5]

Simple and excellent. Qabalah gets easily nerdy, which Lon Milo DuQuette mocks to no end. Hilarious passages - I haven't laughed as well for a long time. I was reminded of the spiritual saying, 'in the evening the wise went out and cleaned their hearts with laughter'.
The Chicken Qabalah lends itself to beginners or those who just want to get a hold of the essentials.

- The Spiritualist, www.thespiritualist.net

[Darrell Kinney · Rating 5 out of 5]

A hilarious and immediately practical toolbox for Qabalah. This book takes an abstruse subject and turns it's on it's head, making it easily accessible. Part mockumentary/part magick essay this book delights as it introduces the basics of Qabalah along with some novel approaches towards numerology, gematria, etc. Full of wisdom and chuckles.

[Saffron · Rating 5 out of 5]

In places completely bonkers. However for anyone who gets fed up of long dry text books trying to teach a complicated subject, this is a golden egg of a book!

The totally fabricated alter ego of Duquette gives his humerous yet informed view of the esoteric teachings of the Qabalah.

Very much an introduction to the subject suitable for anyone interested in beginning their studies.

[Nick · Rating 5 out of 5]

Hysterical and straight forward explanations of the fundamental concepts of Qabalah. A must read if you have any interest in the subject at all.

[Shadazz · Rating 5 out of 5]

In 3 Sentences

1. Everything in heaven and earth is connected to everything in heaven and earth
2. The four parts of the soul are nephesh, ruach, neshama y gia. The only real one is gia.
3. Qabbalah is a way to organize the world so you can find your place in it.

Impresiones

Este libro me recuerda al Quijote. Es una parodia. Utiliza el artificio de un rabbi inexistente que explica la Qabbalah utilizando recursos como un guion de documental, los ensayos de algunos estudiantes. Es una obra literaria en si misma y un excelente libro introductorio para “cabalistas del pollo”

[Orione · Rating 5 out of 5]

Laugh-out-loud funny, but at the same time also very informative. It is on my reference book shelf. I find myself rereading certain essays in the book a couple of times a year.

If you read through the book, it feels like taking a series of lectures by your favourite whackey professor. You sometimes have to battle your way through a pages long dad-joke, but then you are sure to be rewarded by a beautiful nugget of wisdom, or by plain practical advice on how to progress in your studies.
In that sense, it feels very reminiscent of Aleister Crowley’s work itself, but then far gentler, far easier to understand, and funnier. (Deal with it, Beast!)

Highly recommended!

[Strangerealms · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is an excellent introduction book on the Qabalah that the Golden Dawn uses in their workings and their tarot decks. Duquette manages to teach us in a funny way the basics. I'd say for anyone who wants to dabble into Hermetic Qabalah and is looking for an introduction book this is it.

[Doug Luberts · Rating 4 out of 5]

Lon DuQuette takes a whimsical approach to esoteric Qabalah studies through the eyes of fictional Rabbi Lamed Ben Clifford.

Beginners start here, then head on over to Dion Fortune's "Mystical Qabalah".

[Matt · Rating 5 out of 5]

Even better on my second read. Captures the fundamentals and elaborations of Practical Qabalah. Worth repeated study and serves as a practical guide and useful cornerstone in my Qabalistic and Magical library.

[Lisbeth · Rating 5 out of 5]

Hands down the cheekiest, and one of the finest, qabalah tomes yet.

[Matthew · Rating 4 out of 5]

a great introduction to true QBL-ism

[Chris Feldman · Rating 5 out of 5]

Best intro to Qabalah that I know of.

[Laurie · Rating 5 out of 5]

Love this book! Great intro to Qabalah that is both informative and very funny.

[Fumi · Rating 3 out of 5]

It's all in your Head ... You just have no idea how big your head Is

[Mauricio Bruce · Rating 5 out of 5]

If you're interested in learning more about the Quabalah--a GREAT introduction.

[Thomas Pinneck · Rating 5 out of 5]

The Chicken Qabalah of Rabbi Lamed Ben Clifford by Lon Milo DuQuette offers a refreshing and humorous gateway into the often complex and arcane world of Qabalah. With wit and wisdom, DuQuette demystifies esoteric concepts, making them accessible to both beginners and seasoned practitioners seeking a lighter perspective. From the very first page, readers are introduced to Rabbi Lamed Ben Clifford, a fictional yet endearing teacher whose unconventional methods breathe life into traditional Qabalistic teachings. DuQuette's use of pseudepigraphy allows him to explore profound truths while maintaining a playful tone, engaging the reader in a way that scholarly texts seldom achieve. This creative approach not only entertains but also facilitates a deeper understanding by breaking down barriers of intimidation that often surround esoteric studies.

The book excels in simplifying complex ideas without diluting their essence. DuQuette employs simple anecdotes and relatable metaphors to explain the intricacies of the Tree of Life, the Hebrew alphabet, and the numerical relationships central to Qabalistic thought. His explanations are clear and concise, yet rich with insight, enabling readers to grasp fundamental principles that might otherwise seem daunting. One of the standout features is the author's ability to weave humor seamlessly into the teachings. The lightheartedness does not detract from the seriousness of the subject; instead, it enhances retention and makes the learning process enjoyable. Readers will find themselves laughing aloud at times, all the while absorbing significant philosophical and mystical concepts. This balance of levity and depth is a testament to DuQuette's skill as both a writer and a teacher.

Moreover, the book addresses the various spellings and interpretations of Qabalah (Cabbalah, Kabbalah), clarifying differences and commonalities among the traditions. DuQuette navigates these distinctions with ease, providing a comprehensive overview that respects the diversity within the discipline. His inclusive approach encourages readers to explore the Qabalah in a way that resonates with their personal beliefs and practices. The Chicken Qabalah also serves as a practical guide, offering exercises and meditations that invite readers to engage actively with the material. These hands-on elements reinforce the concepts discussed and provide a foundation for further exploration. DuQuette's guidance is encouraging and non-prescriptive, allowing individuals to find their own path within the Qabalistic framework.

For those who have been deterred by the perceived seriousness or complexity of Qabalistic study, this book is a revelation. It proves that profound spiritual wisdom can be conveyed through humor and that learning can be both enlightening and entertaining. DuQuette's approachable style opens doors for a wider audience to appreciate and benefit from the rich traditions of the Qabalah. The Chicken Qabalah of Rabbi Lamed Ben Clifford is a gem in the realm of esoteric literature. Its unique blend of humor, clarity, and depth makes it an invaluable resource for anyone interested in the Qabalah, regardless of prior experience. Lon Milo DuQuette has crafted a work that not only educates but also delights, reminding us that great truths can indeed be transmitted through the medium of laughter.

[Jared Woods · Rating 4 out of 5]

I have always said that if your spiritual philosophies are not hilarious, then I'm not interested. To snag yourself in some sombre interpretation of reality proves you are not paying attention to the absurdity of the bigger picture, and you can stay far away from me with that restricted attitude. Furthermore, humour is practical. When a brain is amused, related synapses fire, granting knowledge easier access, and upon recalling the associated memory, it will be warm from the cerebral oven of joy. No matter how you view it, comedy is the superior method.

The Chicken Qabalah understands the power of comical mysticism to supply its sermon, and it does so with unusual formats and laugh-out-loud deliveries. It introduces Rabbi Lamed Ben Clifford as a man who never existed but definitely did exist but was a phoney rabbi but was the authentic deal. You quickly learn that this book is full of shit because it tells you, yet these confusing layers of seriously funny seriousness and genuine disingenuity serve a purpose. They provide fronts of esoteric weirdness to liberate an exploration removed from convention, warping your supple mind open, willing to receive. And I learned a lot.

Kabbalah is firmly planted in the Jewish Torah, but above other Abrahamic mysticism, it always appealed to me as the most applicable. Without metaphorical fables or ulterior motives to guide morals, it commits to illustrating the anatomy of God using numerology, language, and diagrams. I have yet to study any alphabet as impressive as the Hebrew one, as it is intended to read as a secret code, unlocking the source and revealing a streamlined path from metaphysical divinity to the illusionary material through the Tree of Life.

Of course, all occult schools lead to the same home: the root unified oneness where the whole caboodle emanates from the absolute consciousness (also found in Neoplatonism, Hermeticism, and anything else if you stare at it for enough time). But while the stepping stones differ from teaching to teaching (each as unnecessary and as unprovable as the last), what does it matter how you get there? As long as you get there, right? For now, we should find meaning in everything, even if it's stretchy. Sacrifice your sanity in the pursuit of enlightenment. Who cares if you crack your cortex and your friends don't understand you anymore? Do it because it's fun.

In short, The Chicken Qabalah was precisely what I hoped for, and while I could skip the tarot section, I wish a book like this was available for every mystical sect. Never have I read a text so proficient at explaining itself, and especially considering the complex subject matter, it was an effortless joy to race through. I may be too agnostic to commit to whatever, but such teachings would change anyone's life for the better. In my personal quest to pick apart the hidden mechanics, I feel the dots waking up, and I am ready to venture far deeper into this tradition. Which I will be doing within weeks.

[Fabian Dee · Rating 2 out of 5]

Embarrassing - for the anally retentive, Lon Milo fan club and/or Americans only. I bought this book on the strength of the all 5 star reviews at the time.One narcissist writing about another fictitious narcissist. The book ought to come with a sick bag. A romantic novel, pornographic book or psychological case study perhaps would have worked better. Qabalah is a bit nerdy, let's be honest. All occultism is but Qabalah particularly so. Adding attempts at humour, particularly of a self-conscious 'I'm being really funny right now' manner, do not automatically make it a funny book but just turn it into an embarrassing book for hero worshipping nerds, and over the top, overenthusiastic Americanisms just make it worse for a Brit like myself. The odd comment is mildly amusing but that's about it. The rest is rather twee, normie humour. I am left wishing the author would just get to the point. Rodney Orpheus sounded like he was a really pitiful individual from his preface. The book is filled with a rather unremarkable Q&A style interview with this fictitious egocentric Qabalah expert Ben Clifford, interspersed with plainly presented about Qabalah. The actual Qabalah content looks ok but Lon Milo insists on torturing his readers with the remainder. Had he had a 'whacky' intro and left the rest as serious with the odd joke, it would have been readable, with fictious interviews as an appendix or simply left out and perhaps just referenced on a web site somewhere, which is probably where they belong. If I was to edit this book down to something useable then it would be less than half the number of pages. Unreadable.

[David · Rating 2 out of 5]

There's something disquieting about non-Jews appropriating the symbols and techniques of the Kabbalah for use in their own pagan rituals. While it's certainly the case that the early Kabbalists borrowed heavily from their Christian gnostic neighbours and other non-Jewish sources, as both a practice and a tradition it was always deeply rooted in Judaism. By definition, Kabbalah is "Jewish Mysticism", inseparable from the religious beliefs and observances.

But even if we put all that aside, and assume that I'm being overly sensitive and that the author is operating completely in good faith, with respect and reverence for a religious tradition that he doesn't follow or believe, this is still a really weird little book. It's written in the form of Peter Schickele vis a vis PDQ Bach, with teachings of a fictitious "rabbi" and lots of dumb jokes. It's not so much that I'm offended by the irreverence (a lot of the Kabballah is downright wacky and not above spoofing), and more that it entirely misses the point.

To make things worse, he attempts to use examples from modern science to explain the meaning behind esoteric concepts and inscrutable phrases. But he mangles both sides of the equation, misrepresenting both the science and the mysticism to fit into his own worldview. The whole thing feels very hacked together and contrived, clearly intended for an audience that has already bought in to the same flavour of arcane new age superstitious magical thinking.

[Serfina · Rating 5 out of 5]

شايد بگم بهترين كتابي كه تو زندگيم خوندم.هر جمله هر كلمه جواب خيلي از سوالاي مبهم توي ذهنم بود.خوندنش خيلي طول كشيد چون بايد رو يك قسمتش كلي فكر كرد و حتي كاري ميكنه كه خودمون بتونيم مثل يه قاباليست فكر كنيم ،درك كنيم...
خوندن اين كتاب مثل يه سفر طولاني و پر ماجرا بود كه خيلي از افكار بسته ي گذشته رو بايد كنار ميذاشتم و با يك ذهن پوچ و خالي از اول همه چيو مي سأختم ، باور ها...داده ها...درست و غلط ها...
بهترين كتابه واسه كساييكه ميخوان قبالا رو درك كنن و مهم تر از همه اينكه واقعا راز آلود ترين حقائق رو افشا كرده و مثل بقيه كتابا حرف اضافه و مقدمه ي الكي نداره...چندين كتاب در اين باره خوندم اما همه فقط يك لايه ي خيلي سطحي از اين علم رو در بر داشتن ديگه نااميد بودم از اينكه همچين كتابي هم هست .
به هركسي كه علاقه منده پيشنهادش ميكنم ...

[Chuck Freeburg · Rating 5 out of 5]

informative & transformative

I got this book probably referenced somewhere on Reddit. Just being open to it regardless of the strange name I followed through and finished. I am very very happy I did. There was some great information in here on the breakdown of the tree and some details as to why I wasn’t expecting and haven’t heard when checking out other books. Or maybe some explain them but it went over my head due to the complexity and foreign words. But this book was able to put it in my language and make it easy and enjoyable to understand.

I will definitely being going back periodically to reference tables and ideas from here.

No regrets. I recommend for sure anyone who is interested in these topics and is new like me.