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Travelling to Infinity: My Life with Stephen
Professor Stephen Hawking is one of the most famous and remarkable scientists of our age and author of the scientific bestseller "A Brief History of Time", which sold over 25 million copies across the world and will be adapted as a children's book in the Autumn of next year. In this compelling memoir his first wife, Jane Hawking, relates the inside story of their extraordinary marriage. As Stephen's academic renown soared, his body was collapsing under the assaults of motor neurone disease, and Jane's candid account of trying to balance his 24-hour care with the needs of their growing family will be inspirational to anyone dealing with family illness. The inner-strength of the author, and the self-evident character and achievements of her husband, make for an incredible tale that is always presented with unflinching honesty; the author's candour is no less evident when the marriage finally ends in a high-profile meltdown, with Stephen leaving Jane for one of his nurses, while Jane goes on to marry an old family friend. In this exceptionally open, moving and often funny memoir, Jane Hawking confronts not only the acutely complicated and painful dilemmas of her first marriage, but also the faultlines exposed in a relationship by the pervasive effects of fame and wealth. The result is a book about optimism, love and change that will resonate with readers everywhere.
497 pages, Kindle Edition
First published January 1, 1999
742 people are currently reading
10638 people want to read
About the author
Jane Hawking
6 books119 followersJane Beryl Wilde Hawking Jones (born 29 March 1944) is an English author and teacher.
Jane was born to George and Beryl Wilde (née Eagleton). She grew up in St Albans, Hertfordshire.
She studied languages at the University of London's Westfield College. Jane and Stephen Hawking met through mutual college friends at a party in 1962. Hawking was diagnosed with motor neurone disease (also known as amyotrophic lateral sclerosis or ALS) in 1963. Even aware of his consequent shortened life expectancy and limitations, the couple became engaged in 1964 and married in 1965 in their shared hometown of St Albans. They had three children: Robert, born in 1967, Lucy, born in 1970, and Timothy, born in 1979.
After years of working on her doctoral thesis through Westfield College, Hawking received her PhD in medieval Spanish poetry in April 1981.
In 1999, she wrote an autobiography about her first marriage to Stephen Hawking, Music to Move the Stars: A Life with Stephen.
In 2009, an updated version of the autobiography was republished under the title Travelling to Infinity: My Life with Stephen and was subsequently made into the award-winning film The Theory of Everything. Following the release of the film, Hawking discussed her life on BBC Radio 4's Woman's Hour in January 2015.
Jane was born to George and Beryl Wilde (née Eagleton). She grew up in St Albans, Hertfordshire.
She studied languages at the University of London's Westfield College. Jane and Stephen Hawking met through mutual college friends at a party in 1962. Hawking was diagnosed with motor neurone disease (also known as amyotrophic lateral sclerosis or ALS) in 1963. Even aware of his consequent shortened life expectancy and limitations, the couple became engaged in 1964 and married in 1965 in their shared hometown of St Albans. They had three children: Robert, born in 1967, Lucy, born in 1970, and Timothy, born in 1979.
After years of working on her doctoral thesis through Westfield College, Hawking received her PhD in medieval Spanish poetry in April 1981.
In 1999, she wrote an autobiography about her first marriage to Stephen Hawking, Music to Move the Stars: A Life with Stephen.
In 2009, an updated version of the autobiography was republished under the title Travelling to Infinity: My Life with Stephen and was subsequently made into the award-winning film The Theory of Everything. Following the release of the film, Hawking discussed her life on BBC Radio 4's Woman's Hour in January 2015.
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January 6, 2015
In some cases, it is best to see the film first -- and this is one of them. I was extremely moved by The Theory of Everything, and particularly impressed by the central performances of Stephen Hawking (Eddie Redmayne) and Jane Hawking (Felicity Jones). In the film, Jane Hawking has a steady strength and a calm presence. Even when she becomes increasingly ground down by the demands of Stephen's physical deterioration, there is the sense that she is the strong centre of their marriage and family -- and a hugely important factor in his professional success.
To read this book is to realise, rather crushingly, how very simplified and sugar-coated the cinematic version is compared to what transpired in real life. I had huge sympathy for Jane Hawking and her myriad difficulties, but this is a painful book to read in many senses. It also feels very slanted; perhaps that is inevitable in a memoir, but sometimes Jane Hawking's perceptions and perspective seem filtered through such a strong prism of depression, guilt and self-doubt that I felt that I really wanted some counterbalancing perspectives. Were her in-laws really so insensitive and lacking in understanding? Was Stephen so clueless about the physical/emotional toll on her?
The book begins with a description of a young Jane who is just discovering herself through travels to Spain and a university education studying modern languages. She depicts herself as a typically upper-middle class British girl of her era, albeit of the bluestocking strain. (Both she and Stephen have families with long relationships with Oxford and Cambridge, and there is much talk of music and theatre.) She plays tennis; goes on a secretarial course; learns, falteringly, to drive. Their courtship is much more on-and-off than the film implies, and is interrupted at various points while both of them travel. They had barely started dating when Stephen was diagnosed with motor neurone disease, and one never quite gets the sense of why she wanted to persist with such a fledgling relationship at that point. Conversely, she conveys that getting married (and later, having children) gives Stephen the confidence and security to really pursue his own intellectual and professional dreams.
I don't feel that I really learned all that much about Stephen Hawking in this book. Although she occasionally makes reference to his charm, wit and charisma, what mostly comes across is his intellectual arrogance, his disdain for her religious beliefs and his utter self-absorption with physics and his career. Frankly, he sounds like a selfish monster. Probably the genius, the physics, or the degenerative disease would have been difficult enough, just on their own -- but taken together they are a triple whammy. Even worse, she describes a Stephen who will not talk about difficulties, his own or those that they share. The physical and emotional burdens that she feels until Jonathan comes into her life (more on that) seem unbearable, and she often describes her total exhaustion. Add to that her own insecurity -- about being reduced to a domestic drudge, about not fulfilling her own intellectual or professional abilities -- and this book is a long series of laments. I was compelled by it, and yet it could be extremely tiresome. There is way too much detail about inessentials, and not nearly enough insight. She goes to great lengths to describe the innocence of her relationship with Jonathan --who becomes a friend and support in the household for many years, and later her husband when she and Stephen divorce. I believed her, and yet she protested way too much (which leads to inevitable doubts). She seemed to feel SO guilty for not being able to parent single-handedly, plus take care of an invalid AND his glittering career, plus ask nothing for herself . . . and yet, WHY? She is constantly trying to convince the reader of her worthiness, which is not at all necessary, whilst never quite believing it herself. Emotionally draining stuff.
To read this book is to realise, rather crushingly, how very simplified and sugar-coated the cinematic version is compared to what transpired in real life. I had huge sympathy for Jane Hawking and her myriad difficulties, but this is a painful book to read in many senses. It also feels very slanted; perhaps that is inevitable in a memoir, but sometimes Jane Hawking's perceptions and perspective seem filtered through such a strong prism of depression, guilt and self-doubt that I felt that I really wanted some counterbalancing perspectives. Were her in-laws really so insensitive and lacking in understanding? Was Stephen so clueless about the physical/emotional toll on her?
The book begins with a description of a young Jane who is just discovering herself through travels to Spain and a university education studying modern languages. She depicts herself as a typically upper-middle class British girl of her era, albeit of the bluestocking strain. (Both she and Stephen have families with long relationships with Oxford and Cambridge, and there is much talk of music and theatre.) She plays tennis; goes on a secretarial course; learns, falteringly, to drive. Their courtship is much more on-and-off than the film implies, and is interrupted at various points while both of them travel. They had barely started dating when Stephen was diagnosed with motor neurone disease, and one never quite gets the sense of why she wanted to persist with such a fledgling relationship at that point. Conversely, she conveys that getting married (and later, having children) gives Stephen the confidence and security to really pursue his own intellectual and professional dreams.
I don't feel that I really learned all that much about Stephen Hawking in this book. Although she occasionally makes reference to his charm, wit and charisma, what mostly comes across is his intellectual arrogance, his disdain for her religious beliefs and his utter self-absorption with physics and his career. Frankly, he sounds like a selfish monster. Probably the genius, the physics, or the degenerative disease would have been difficult enough, just on their own -- but taken together they are a triple whammy. Even worse, she describes a Stephen who will not talk about difficulties, his own or those that they share. The physical and emotional burdens that she feels until Jonathan comes into her life (more on that) seem unbearable, and she often describes her total exhaustion. Add to that her own insecurity -- about being reduced to a domestic drudge, about not fulfilling her own intellectual or professional abilities -- and this book is a long series of laments. I was compelled by it, and yet it could be extremely tiresome. There is way too much detail about inessentials, and not nearly enough insight. She goes to great lengths to describe the innocence of her relationship with Jonathan --who becomes a friend and support in the household for many years, and later her husband when she and Stephen divorce. I believed her, and yet she protested way too much (which leads to inevitable doubts). She seemed to feel SO guilty for not being able to parent single-handedly, plus take care of an invalid AND his glittering career, plus ask nothing for herself . . . and yet, WHY? She is constantly trying to convince the reader of her worthiness, which is not at all necessary, whilst never quite believing it herself. Emotionally draining stuff.
June 14, 2008
This is Jane Hawking's story of her 25 year marriage to Stephen Hawking, who is arguably the most famous physicist since Newton. Stephen Hawking's improbable and inspiring story is well known -- how he made significant scientific breakthroughs and achieved great fame and celebrity despite being the victim of a debilitating and progressive neurological disease (motor-neuron or Lou Gehrig's disease) which eventually took away almost all of his ability to do anything for himself but to think. He may be the only scientist alive whose name is known to millions of people, and has achieved a celebrity status usually reserved for rock stars and accomplished athletes.
Stephen Hawking's book A Brief History of Time sold 25 million copies, an astounding and truly incredible fact considering the arcane nature of its subject matter and the fact that it is not dumbed down physics, but is actually quite hard to read and even harder to understand. It has been said that never in history has a book been bought by so many people who did not read it. That is probably a testament to the enduring mark Stephen has made on people by the force of his determination and unbreakable spirit in the face of great adversity.
Also well known, and the subject of much gossip and speculation, is the story of how Stephen divorced Jane after 25 years of marriage to live with and then marry one of his nurses. Jane Hawking's book is circumspect and honest. Those looking for salacious details will be disappointed. But those looking for an insightful examination of what makes marriages and relationships succeed (and fail) will be richly rewarded.
Jane Hawking writes that her story "would be quite ordinary, quite common to most people's lives, were it not for two factors: motor-neuron disease and geniuis." In other words, but for the fact that she was married to an iconic figure who was both a towering intellect and a devastatingly disabled person. Both of these factors did put unusual stresses on the marriage. While Jane describes these unusual difficulties, this also is an ordinary story, dealing with many of the common-place problems and joys that people encounter as they try to forge a life together.
Some of these problems and joys, like shared interests and clashing beliefs, a spouse's annoying and endearing characteritstics, helpful relatives and toxic ones, are most likely found in virtually all relationships. Others are also common, if not pervasive. For instance, the stresses caused when one partner overshadows the other in accomplishment and attention. Added to this was the demanding nature of Stephen's illness, which consumed much of Jane's time and energies for many of the years of their marriage, and the difficulty of trying to raise three children while caring for a disabled husband. Jane's struggle to find her own career and to feel like something more than an appendage to a famous spouse mirrors the struggle that many couples grapple with -- how to be a unit or team while still being individuals.
Bittersweet in places, sometimes downright sad, nonethess, at bottom it is inspiring, for it is the story of not one person of indomitable will and soaring spirit who survived great difficulties, but two.
Stephen Hawking's book A Brief History of Time sold 25 million copies, an astounding and truly incredible fact considering the arcane nature of its subject matter and the fact that it is not dumbed down physics, but is actually quite hard to read and even harder to understand. It has been said that never in history has a book been bought by so many people who did not read it. That is probably a testament to the enduring mark Stephen has made on people by the force of his determination and unbreakable spirit in the face of great adversity.
Also well known, and the subject of much gossip and speculation, is the story of how Stephen divorced Jane after 25 years of marriage to live with and then marry one of his nurses. Jane Hawking's book is circumspect and honest. Those looking for salacious details will be disappointed. But those looking for an insightful examination of what makes marriages and relationships succeed (and fail) will be richly rewarded.
Jane Hawking writes that her story "would be quite ordinary, quite common to most people's lives, were it not for two factors: motor-neuron disease and geniuis." In other words, but for the fact that she was married to an iconic figure who was both a towering intellect and a devastatingly disabled person. Both of these factors did put unusual stresses on the marriage. While Jane describes these unusual difficulties, this also is an ordinary story, dealing with many of the common-place problems and joys that people encounter as they try to forge a life together.
Some of these problems and joys, like shared interests and clashing beliefs, a spouse's annoying and endearing characteritstics, helpful relatives and toxic ones, are most likely found in virtually all relationships. Others are also common, if not pervasive. For instance, the stresses caused when one partner overshadows the other in accomplishment and attention. Added to this was the demanding nature of Stephen's illness, which consumed much of Jane's time and energies for many of the years of their marriage, and the difficulty of trying to raise three children while caring for a disabled husband. Jane's struggle to find her own career and to feel like something more than an appendage to a famous spouse mirrors the struggle that many couples grapple with -- how to be a unit or team while still being individuals.
Bittersweet in places, sometimes downright sad, nonethess, at bottom it is inspiring, for it is the story of not one person of indomitable will and soaring spirit who survived great difficulties, but two.
August 1, 2025
Quando o Impossível Acontece
Alguém disse um dia que:
"The impossible only takes a lil longer"
Pois é exactamente o que aqui acontece!...
Se confrontados com a adversidade, optarmos pela luta, preterindo a passividade derrotista, avançamos no caminho da auto-descoberta!
Enveredamos por um trilho de luz, de clarividência, sem lugar para dúvidas em relação ao próximo passo ...
Esta história é um testemunho do poder da mente, que quando determinada a vencer dificuldades é capaz de produzir milagres!
Por vezes, o impossível é apenas o que nunca antes foi tentado...
NOTA: Esta seria uma leitura de 5 estrelas, não fosse a narrativa perder-se por aqui e ali, em pequenas trivialidades. Não obstante, não será para desprezar, tendo em conta a mensagem poderosa que transmite, e que até é corroborada pela autenticidade dos acontecimentos relatados! 😍👍
Alguém disse um dia que:
"The impossible only takes a lil longer"
Pois é exactamente o que aqui acontece!...
Se confrontados com a adversidade, optarmos pela luta, preterindo a passividade derrotista, avançamos no caminho da auto-descoberta!
Enveredamos por um trilho de luz, de clarividência, sem lugar para dúvidas em relação ao próximo passo ...
Esta história é um testemunho do poder da mente, que quando determinada a vencer dificuldades é capaz de produzir milagres!
Por vezes, o impossível é apenas o que nunca antes foi tentado...
NOTA: Esta seria uma leitura de 5 estrelas, não fosse a narrativa perder-se por aqui e ali, em pequenas trivialidades. Não obstante, não será para desprezar, tendo em conta a mensagem poderosa que transmite, e que até é corroborada pela autenticidade dos acontecimentos relatados! 😍👍
November 23, 2014
Very disappointing and too long. I wanted to learn more what it was like living with a genius with a serious progressive illness. She was overwhelmed most of the time trying to be there for her demanding husband and the needs of the children, but it was more a complaint than trying to convey the situation. I wanted to know more about day to day life and not so many details of her houses, renovations, gardens, friends etc.
February 15, 2015
I really wanted to enjoy this book, but it just wasn't what I was hoping for. I honestly am not sure what I was wanting, but I guess it was something more learned and/or intimate than this. This felt like it was hundreds of pages of Jane trying to justify her life by writing about every last friend that they had over their shared past however-many years of marriage and all the daily activities she did to tend house, care for children, do grocery shopping etc.
Maybe I wanted to know more about their relationship, her feelings and thoughts on the work he was doing (wasn't she at all involved in the discussion or theorizing?), interesting stories that would add nuance and color to an incredible scientific personality.
But this book ended up being so pedestrian and mundane. I left the book feeling like it was a way for her to cash in on her relationship without having any viable content to share. She didn't take us on any journey of any exciting or interesting path. Instead, I just got to learn about where they lived, who they saw practically every single day, and other dull details of their lives.
Maybe I wanted to know more about their relationship, her feelings and thoughts on the work he was doing (wasn't she at all involved in the discussion or theorizing?), interesting stories that would add nuance and color to an incredible scientific personality.
But this book ended up being so pedestrian and mundane. I left the book feeling like it was a way for her to cash in on her relationship without having any viable content to share. She didn't take us on any journey of any exciting or interesting path. Instead, I just got to learn about where they lived, who they saw practically every single day, and other dull details of their lives.
October 18, 2019
A long overdue book finally read!
Jane talks about Stephen's difficult personality n challenges with loving care, compassion n protective aura which makes the books all the more beautiful and authentic, its removed from any kind of vendetta, she even talks sympathetically about the Palestinian plight at the hand of Israeli soldiers in a brief passage while recounting the horror of holocaust n the irony of situation. Over all it gives u a peep into various human being's minds from the perspective of a wife a mother a lover and above all a female human being moved by art and literature, struggling to maintain her individual identity while being overshadowed by Stephen n his demands on her time n person. All the while denouncing the lack of compassion , cruelty of fame, money and world's bitter attitude towards the disabled and the less lucky creatures including trees :)
Just glad that i saw the movie before I read it, otherwise the movie distorts so many facts n timelines that it would've been hard to enjoy it after reading the book.
Jane talks about Stephen's difficult personality n challenges with loving care, compassion n protective aura which makes the books all the more beautiful and authentic, its removed from any kind of vendetta, she even talks sympathetically about the Palestinian plight at the hand of Israeli soldiers in a brief passage while recounting the horror of holocaust n the irony of situation. Over all it gives u a peep into various human being's minds from the perspective of a wife a mother a lover and above all a female human being moved by art and literature, struggling to maintain her individual identity while being overshadowed by Stephen n his demands on her time n person. All the while denouncing the lack of compassion , cruelty of fame, money and world's bitter attitude towards the disabled and the less lucky creatures including trees :)
Just glad that i saw the movie before I read it, otherwise the movie distorts so many facts n timelines that it would've been hard to enjoy it after reading the book.
March 9, 2015
This the kind of book which you either love or hate.
Certainly, if you watched the movie, you'll love it, even if I haven't done yet. All the romantics aspects would be some way exacerbated.
If you are a fan of memoir/biography books you will find a mixture of everything in this book, such as: their personal lives (yes!), mixed with some hints of physics (of course) and history of science (in a biography?).
In summary, even the idea of the author seems brilliant, she looses the main plot by trying to explain everything to us, poor readers.
If you really want to know more about Stephen Hawking, please read his book A Brief History of Time.
Update:
Daily Mail review.
Certainly, if you watched the movie, you'll love it, even if I haven't done yet. All the romantics aspects would be some way exacerbated.
If you are a fan of memoir/biography books you will find a mixture of everything in this book, such as: their personal lives (yes!), mixed with some hints of physics (of course) and history of science (in a biography?).
In summary, even the idea of the author seems brilliant, she looses the main plot by trying to explain everything to us, poor readers.
If you really want to know more about Stephen Hawking, please read his book A Brief History of Time.
Update:
Daily Mail review.
April 25, 2017
I've been trying to finish this book since high school but I ended up dropping it every time; it was a bit long for me at that time. But after watching the movie, I was determined to finish it and I found it absolutely overwhelming and compelling! I did enjoy the movie more since the book had a lot of unnecessary details. Nevertheless, this book is incredible and deserves to be read at least once in a lifetime! 👏🏼
September 2, 2014
(As written for Google Books page on this edition)
Compelling and unforgettable, if not exactly enjoyable or fun reading, Jane Hawking provides a richly detailed personal memoir of her own life, starring not herself in the leading role, but rather her then-husband, the world-famous scientist Stephen Hawking. It is a horror tale in the truest sense - not only in discussing the brutality of ALS, or motor neurone disease, and its ravages on Stephen Hawkings's body, but the staggering and shocking emotional cruelty experienced by his infinitely patient, tough, adoring wife and family at his hands and those of his immediate family. If anyone spoke to me the way that Stephen's mother spoke to Jane, I'd be in jail because I'd have to try to choke the life from them. And yet Jane is no doormat, not really - she is merely beaten down by physical and emotional exhaustion and blinkered by her love of this incredibly vexing, brilliant, selfish, egotistical man. To discuss in greater detail would be to deprive the reader her own chance to personally experience the story; I don't imagine everyone will have the same opinion of the quality of the writing, the maddening aspects of the genius personality, of Jane's right to do and feel as she did and does. But as an example of the story behind the story, of how fame and renown can be used as a dropcloth to conceal the most hideous aspects of humanity, of the systematic erasing of a woman's self-esteem and worth by decades of cruelty and contempt - this is a top notch work of biography and a valuable piece of a feminist canon. Honestly, what would you do? Can you truly say that you'd have done better?
I still look up to and adore Stephen Hawking, but now, also loathe him completely in a way I usually associate with people I know personally. He's a human to me now. Well done.
Compelling and unforgettable, if not exactly enjoyable or fun reading, Jane Hawking provides a richly detailed personal memoir of her own life, starring not herself in the leading role, but rather her then-husband, the world-famous scientist Stephen Hawking. It is a horror tale in the truest sense - not only in discussing the brutality of ALS, or motor neurone disease, and its ravages on Stephen Hawkings's body, but the staggering and shocking emotional cruelty experienced by his infinitely patient, tough, adoring wife and family at his hands and those of his immediate family. If anyone spoke to me the way that Stephen's mother spoke to Jane, I'd be in jail because I'd have to try to choke the life from them. And yet Jane is no doormat, not really - she is merely beaten down by physical and emotional exhaustion and blinkered by her love of this incredibly vexing, brilliant, selfish, egotistical man. To discuss in greater detail would be to deprive the reader her own chance to personally experience the story; I don't imagine everyone will have the same opinion of the quality of the writing, the maddening aspects of the genius personality, of Jane's right to do and feel as she did and does. But as an example of the story behind the story, of how fame and renown can be used as a dropcloth to conceal the most hideous aspects of humanity, of the systematic erasing of a woman's self-esteem and worth by decades of cruelty and contempt - this is a top notch work of biography and a valuable piece of a feminist canon. Honestly, what would you do? Can you truly say that you'd have done better?
I still look up to and adore Stephen Hawking, but now, also loathe him completely in a way I usually associate with people I know personally. He's a human to me now. Well done.
November 5, 2014
"Just as we thought we had escaped the worst of the winter's ills, the spring of 1976 lay in wait with a series of cruel tricks which made of it an obstacle course akin to a snakes-and-ladders board, though with many more snakes than ladders and with the dice weighted to land on the snakes."
"...it was obvious to everyone, except to Stephen and his subversive minions, that I would not be well enough to travel."
[During her second wedding] "There were the odd distracting moments -- such as the horrible scratchy pen which turned my signature on the registers into an untidy scrawl, bringing back humiliating memories of a failed art exam in calligraphy at St. Albans High School."
This book was incredible in that I have never seen, read, or experienced anything as negative in my life. Every minute was an opportunity to complain and to beg for sympathy. I was in awe by 20%, and then I just had to keep reading to see if the entire book could really continue at that rate. It did! Amazing. A situation will be described as terrible, awful, and traumatic, only to be referred to as "not bad" in comparison to what horror was next for her! I think she would have garnered the sympathy craved if she had described life more evenly, as yes certainly there were plenty of struggles. But she was also financially secure (buying and remodeling several houses with help from parents/in-laws) and traveling the world. So many things (the chicken pox! ohmygosh the chicken pox!!) were blown out of proportion that it diluted the actual challenges.
"...it was obvious to everyone, except to Stephen and his subversive minions, that I would not be well enough to travel."
[During her second wedding] "There were the odd distracting moments -- such as the horrible scratchy pen which turned my signature on the registers into an untidy scrawl, bringing back humiliating memories of a failed art exam in calligraphy at St. Albans High School."
This book was incredible in that I have never seen, read, or experienced anything as negative in my life. Every minute was an opportunity to complain and to beg for sympathy. I was in awe by 20%, and then I just had to keep reading to see if the entire book could really continue at that rate. It did! Amazing. A situation will be described as terrible, awful, and traumatic, only to be referred to as "not bad" in comparison to what horror was next for her! I think she would have garnered the sympathy craved if she had described life more evenly, as yes certainly there were plenty of struggles. But she was also financially secure (buying and remodeling several houses with help from parents/in-laws) and traveling the world. So many things (the chicken pox! ohmygosh the chicken pox!!) were blown out of proportion that it diluted the actual challenges.
September 6, 2023
Not entertaining per say but very informative to the point that I feel smarter for having read it 😆
April 6, 2015
This book wasn't what I was expecting. After seeing the movie Theory of Everything, I wanted to read the book to get more insight on the relationship between Stephen and Jane Hawking as well as the struggles with motor neuron disease. I was expecting a narrative, and instead got what at first seemed like a laundry list of their everyday tasks for twenty-five years.
The beginning was painful to get through because of the indiscriminate need to include even the most minute details of their lives. Everything was laid out chronologically as the book was compiled of a million small stories that didn't create any kind of narrative arc, only served to give a complete account as to what they ate for breakfast and which flights they took to what countries. She also delved pretty deep into the science of Stephen's book as well as her own studies on Medieval Spanish poetry, which might be interesting to some but was dry to me. Her editor did, in deed, fail her in this respect.
However - I think the book IS important for the reasons Jane describes in the epilogue. To show what it is like living with/taking care of someone who has motor neuron disease, especially someone who is a famous scientist. Many people insist that this reads like a huge complaint by Jane, but I think she has been so pushed back into the corner that she more than deserves to tell her side of the story (and the caretakers side of the story). Yes, she does defend herself very loudly and yes, she does complain about the stresses of their lives very often. But I don't blame her. Her attitude and will to do whatever it took was inspiring, and by the end of the book I was moved to tears.
Read this if you have a lot of time and patience, and it will be worth it if you stick with it to the end. It really is an amazing story, and while it wasn't the passionate drama I was expecting, I think it was beneficial. I was also surprised at how different the movie portrayed the second half of their lives from what Jane describes. I think that even with the movie she was done a great injustice. She is still struggling with the idea that Stephen is an idol and she is the woman who couldn't give him everything he needed. I have nothing but respect for her.
The beginning was painful to get through because of the indiscriminate need to include even the most minute details of their lives. Everything was laid out chronologically as the book was compiled of a million small stories that didn't create any kind of narrative arc, only served to give a complete account as to what they ate for breakfast and which flights they took to what countries. She also delved pretty deep into the science of Stephen's book as well as her own studies on Medieval Spanish poetry, which might be interesting to some but was dry to me. Her editor did, in deed, fail her in this respect.
However - I think the book IS important for the reasons Jane describes in the epilogue. To show what it is like living with/taking care of someone who has motor neuron disease, especially someone who is a famous scientist. Many people insist that this reads like a huge complaint by Jane, but I think she has been so pushed back into the corner that she more than deserves to tell her side of the story (and the caretakers side of the story). Yes, she does defend herself very loudly and yes, she does complain about the stresses of their lives very often. But I don't blame her. Her attitude and will to do whatever it took was inspiring, and by the end of the book I was moved to tears.
Read this if you have a lot of time and patience, and it will be worth it if you stick with it to the end. It really is an amazing story, and while it wasn't the passionate drama I was expecting, I think it was beneficial. I was also surprised at how different the movie portrayed the second half of their lives from what Jane describes. I think that even with the movie she was done a great injustice. She is still struggling with the idea that Stephen is an idol and she is the woman who couldn't give him everything he needed. I have nothing but respect for her.
May 6, 2016
Since it took me over two months to finish this book, I felt compelled to write a review. I was (and still am) strongly debating whether this book deserves three stars or four. As I remember Eileen once saying in a previous review, a three suggests mediocrity. However, a four suggests some form of brilliance to me. To rate this book a four would be comparing it to books like I Know Why The Caged Bird Sing and Brave New World (and other books that I've rated a four), and this book simply doesn't fit into that category.
At times, she frustrated me, and at other times, I truly sympathized (and sometimes emphasized) with her. I am not criticizing her actual life or her relationship with Stephen but rather her writing style. It was monotonous and repetitive at times, and while her sentence fluency and vocabulary is actually quite amazing (rightly so, considering that she studied romance languages), her story just seemed to be a blur of pessimism and unnecessary detail. I'm not really sure what I wanted or expected out of it; perhaps I wanted a little more of Stephen's personality or a little more optimism or some more insight from her present self. Simply put, I often grew bored of her reiterations.
Despite this, I do have an even greater respect for Jane Hawking. To survive and prosper in such emotional turmoil is frankly amazing. To this day, she is a friend of Stephen and champions for the rights of disabled people. Regardless of her writing style, Travelling to Infinity does give an enormous amount of insight into what it's like to have ALS and what it's like to be a caregiver for someone with ALS.
At times, she frustrated me, and at other times, I truly sympathized (and sometimes emphasized) with her. I am not criticizing her actual life or her relationship with Stephen but rather her writing style. It was monotonous and repetitive at times, and while her sentence fluency and vocabulary is actually quite amazing (rightly so, considering that she studied romance languages), her story just seemed to be a blur of pessimism and unnecessary detail. I'm not really sure what I wanted or expected out of it; perhaps I wanted a little more of Stephen's personality or a little more optimism or some more insight from her present self. Simply put, I often grew bored of her reiterations.
Despite this, I do have an even greater respect for Jane Hawking. To survive and prosper in such emotional turmoil is frankly amazing. To this day, she is a friend of Stephen and champions for the rights of disabled people. Regardless of her writing style, Travelling to Infinity does give an enormous amount of insight into what it's like to have ALS and what it's like to be a caregiver for someone with ALS.
May 27, 2015
Este es el primer libro sobre Stephen Hawking que leo en mi vida, conocía previamente su trayectoria como gran científico y los logros personales de no dejar que la parálisis permanente con la que vive lo haya detenido nunca, pero más allá de eso no conocía de su vida. En mi propia ignorancia, reconozco que lo que me motivó a leer este libro fue la película The Theory of Everything (La Teoría del Todo), por el simple detalle de ver a Hawking caminar, moverse y hablar como el resto de las personas antes de que fuera diagnosticado con la enfermedad de la motoneurona a unos escasos 21 años, donde apenas comienza recién a vivirse la adultez y de la figura anónima que lo acompañó por años y a quien recién ahora se le va otorgando el reconocimiento que se le merece, porque ésta en realidad no es la vida de Stephen Hawking, sino de Jane Hawking, quien fue su primer esposa por veinticinco años, quien a pesar de todas las adversidades que le avecinaban, decidió casarse con él, ser su compañera por veinticinco años de matrimonio y la madre de sus tres hijos.
El libro nos da una mirada detalla y concisa (que a veces puede ser un poco lenta por la falta de diálogos), de casi tres décadas de vida en común. Fue interesante conocer y leer como esta sencilla joven de Cambridge conoce y se enamora de un joven Stephen, así como al mismo tiempo fue bastante conmovedor ver a este famoso científico ser un poco más humilde. Sus viajes por Europa, especialmente por España y Francia, su amor y pasión por la poesía medieval, su creencia en Dios a diferencia de Stephen, quien se considera un ateo permanente y sus primeras dudas luego de enterarse de la enfermedad del joven. Conforme los capítulos van pasando (y algunos son tan largos como los años en que transcurre la historia recordada), se puede apreciar una gran gama de personajes famosos que se hicieron amigos de la singular pareja y fueron una gran ayuda (especialmente cuando Stephen comienza a perder de forma gradual los movimientos de forma notoria sin poder realizar las funciones más básicas y al mismo tiempo su fama comienza a crecer), como Kip Thorne, Roger Penrose, George Ellis, Dennis Sciama, Gaileo Galilei, Isaac Newton y muchos más de alrededor del mundo y la historia. (Personalmente, me sorprendió y me gustó que Jane mencionara a Chile, mi país, y lo ocurrido en la dictadura militar de Pinochet, nunca pensé que hubiera conocido a varios chilenos o que nombrara la figura de Pablo Neruda). A la vez se puede apreciar la evolución de la misma Jane con el correr de los años, de la joven estudiante a un ama de casa y posteriormente madre de tres hijos, Robert, Lucy y Timothy y su camino para lograr su propio mágister en poesía medieval española. Claro que no todo el libro es color de rosa, luego comienza a ponerse difícil y comienzan a verse las verdaderas pruebas. Como figura protagonista de su propia vida, muchas veces, Jane Hawking parece estar relegada a un personaje secundario en comparación de la creciente fama de Stephen con sus descubrimientos sobre los agujeros negros y el encontrar una ecuación que unifique toda la teoría del origen del universo. Muchas veces dejando sus propios sueños, especialmente su tesis, para apoyar no solo los sueños de su marido, sino la crianza de sus primeros dos hijos, Robert y Lucy, especialmente siendo una madre primeriza y que no siempre puede contar con la ayuda de Stephen, debido a su notoria discapacidad. Así como al mismo tiempo las tareas más básicas en la casa comienzan a ser complicadas. Se puede admirar su esfuerzo y empeño por querer que las cosas salgan bien, pero también se comparte un sentimiento de injusticia debido al poco cuidado que se le daban a los discapacitados en esa época, porque dudo que Jane hubiera podido lograrlo si no hubiera sido por la gran ayuda que recibió de muchas buenas personas que pasaron por su camino. Pero el precio del esfuerzo y de la fama no siempre es con las más buenas intenciones. Jane tiene que enfrentar un mundo que muchas veces se muestra más que injusto y prejuicioso, un mundo que puede aceptar a Stephen Hawking como un genio, pero donde ella es mirada en menos debido a su condición de mujer, esposa y sin título universitario donde como señalé al principio, relegada a un papel secundario muy inmerecido cuando siempre se le debió de dar más y muchas veces proviniendo de los lugares menos esperados y más cercanos al mismo tiempo. También debe enfrentar sus batallas internas, especialmente cuando en medio de su matrimonio con Stephen, encontrará el amor con Jonathan, un músico viudo que entra a formar parte de la familia como amigo y ayudando tanto a Stephen como a los pequeños Hawking, muchas veces ocultando el afecto que ambos sienten debido a la situación de Stephen, un dilema moral enorme que muchas veces no le será fácil a Jane, quien al fin y al cabo es una mujer con sueños y anhelos como muchas en el mundo que buscan la felicidad y el amor, especialmente cuando éste aparece en los momentos más inesperados y singulares.
Narrativamente me gustó mucho, quizás no a todos les guste o pueda ser una lectura algo pesada, pero Jane hace gala y honor a sus inspiraciones poéticas a la hora de narrar sus memorias, una tarea que no siempre suele ser fácil, porque si algo es seguro, es que la memoria colectiva nunca coinciden a la hora de recordar detalles. He encontrado similitudes tanto en The Theory of Everything y Hawking, donde un joven Benedict Cumberbatch interpreta a Stephen en sus comienzos como científico y cuando la enfermedad de la motoneurona aparece en su vida. Pero aquí se puede leer la vida de una mujer que contra todo pronóstico logró formar una familia y ayudar a uno de los científicos más inteligentes y respetados del siglo, titularse de su carrera a pesar de los años que le tomó y aunque sabemos cómo terminó todo entre el matrimonio Hawking para los que conocen la historia, no hay que verlo como un triste final, sino como el avance a un siguiente capítulo. Resumiendo en pocas palabras, es un relato de toda una vida en conjunto, un proyecto de vida y convivencia y un relato de amor genuino y conmovedor en honor al amor en pareja, el amor hacia los amigos, los padres, los hijos y la vida misma.
El libro nos da una mirada detalla y concisa (que a veces puede ser un poco lenta por la falta de diálogos), de casi tres décadas de vida en común. Fue interesante conocer y leer como esta sencilla joven de Cambridge conoce y se enamora de un joven Stephen, así como al mismo tiempo fue bastante conmovedor ver a este famoso científico ser un poco más humilde. Sus viajes por Europa, especialmente por España y Francia, su amor y pasión por la poesía medieval, su creencia en Dios a diferencia de Stephen, quien se considera un ateo permanente y sus primeras dudas luego de enterarse de la enfermedad del joven. Conforme los capítulos van pasando (y algunos son tan largos como los años en que transcurre la historia recordada), se puede apreciar una gran gama de personajes famosos que se hicieron amigos de la singular pareja y fueron una gran ayuda (especialmente cuando Stephen comienza a perder de forma gradual los movimientos de forma notoria sin poder realizar las funciones más básicas y al mismo tiempo su fama comienza a crecer), como Kip Thorne, Roger Penrose, George Ellis, Dennis Sciama, Gaileo Galilei, Isaac Newton y muchos más de alrededor del mundo y la historia. (Personalmente, me sorprendió y me gustó que Jane mencionara a Chile, mi país, y lo ocurrido en la dictadura militar de Pinochet, nunca pensé que hubiera conocido a varios chilenos o que nombrara la figura de Pablo Neruda). A la vez se puede apreciar la evolución de la misma Jane con el correr de los años, de la joven estudiante a un ama de casa y posteriormente madre de tres hijos, Robert, Lucy y Timothy y su camino para lograr su propio mágister en poesía medieval española. Claro que no todo el libro es color de rosa, luego comienza a ponerse difícil y comienzan a verse las verdaderas pruebas. Como figura protagonista de su propia vida, muchas veces, Jane Hawking parece estar relegada a un personaje secundario en comparación de la creciente fama de Stephen con sus descubrimientos sobre los agujeros negros y el encontrar una ecuación que unifique toda la teoría del origen del universo. Muchas veces dejando sus propios sueños, especialmente su tesis, para apoyar no solo los sueños de su marido, sino la crianza de sus primeros dos hijos, Robert y Lucy, especialmente siendo una madre primeriza y que no siempre puede contar con la ayuda de Stephen, debido a su notoria discapacidad. Así como al mismo tiempo las tareas más básicas en la casa comienzan a ser complicadas. Se puede admirar su esfuerzo y empeño por querer que las cosas salgan bien, pero también se comparte un sentimiento de injusticia debido al poco cuidado que se le daban a los discapacitados en esa época, porque dudo que Jane hubiera podido lograrlo si no hubiera sido por la gran ayuda que recibió de muchas buenas personas que pasaron por su camino. Pero el precio del esfuerzo y de la fama no siempre es con las más buenas intenciones. Jane tiene que enfrentar un mundo que muchas veces se muestra más que injusto y prejuicioso, un mundo que puede aceptar a Stephen Hawking como un genio, pero donde ella es mirada en menos debido a su condición de mujer, esposa y sin título universitario donde como señalé al principio, relegada a un papel secundario muy inmerecido cuando siempre se le debió de dar más y muchas veces proviniendo de los lugares menos esperados y más cercanos al mismo tiempo. También debe enfrentar sus batallas internas, especialmente cuando en medio de su matrimonio con Stephen, encontrará el amor con Jonathan, un músico viudo que entra a formar parte de la familia como amigo y ayudando tanto a Stephen como a los pequeños Hawking, muchas veces ocultando el afecto que ambos sienten debido a la situación de Stephen, un dilema moral enorme que muchas veces no le será fácil a Jane, quien al fin y al cabo es una mujer con sueños y anhelos como muchas en el mundo que buscan la felicidad y el amor, especialmente cuando éste aparece en los momentos más inesperados y singulares.
Narrativamente me gustó mucho, quizás no a todos les guste o pueda ser una lectura algo pesada, pero Jane hace gala y honor a sus inspiraciones poéticas a la hora de narrar sus memorias, una tarea que no siempre suele ser fácil, porque si algo es seguro, es que la memoria colectiva nunca coinciden a la hora de recordar detalles. He encontrado similitudes tanto en The Theory of Everything y Hawking, donde un joven Benedict Cumberbatch interpreta a Stephen en sus comienzos como científico y cuando la enfermedad de la motoneurona aparece en su vida. Pero aquí se puede leer la vida de una mujer que contra todo pronóstico logró formar una familia y ayudar a uno de los científicos más inteligentes y respetados del siglo, titularse de su carrera a pesar de los años que le tomó y aunque sabemos cómo terminó todo entre el matrimonio Hawking para los que conocen la historia, no hay que verlo como un triste final, sino como el avance a un siguiente capítulo. Resumiendo en pocas palabras, es un relato de toda una vida en conjunto, un proyecto de vida y convivencia y un relato de amor genuino y conmovedor en honor al amor en pareja, el amor hacia los amigos, los padres, los hijos y la vida misma.
November 26, 2014
1.5 stars
This book has been described as optimistic and inspiring, but it seemed to me that the writer was very negative, complaining and demanding sympathy. There were many great challenges in her life and the reader could be more sympathetic if she wasn't complaining about everyday stresses that most everyone experiences.
She knew Stephen's medical condition when they married, but blames her time caring for him on delaying her work on her PHD in Spanish literature. But she describes endless concerts, parties, dinners, picnics, ballet shows, travel, renovating a number of their homes and making gardens. She complains about her in-laws as not being helpful enough although they did help, and so did her relatives, friends, students, government agencies and the University. Not many people as caregivers for severely disabled relatives have such wealth or resources.
She was happy when she moves her "platonic" lover into the home with Stephen and the children. Then goes on trips to Europe with this man and attends many musical events with him.
She is annoyed when Stephen receives medals and honours, and mentions that only twice she received gifts at these events. She is furious when Steven's sister asks her if her third child is Steven's or the live in boyfriend. She lacks self-awareness and seems to feel entitled and resentful of her husband's fame. After 25 years marriage Stephen announces he is divorcing her to marry one of his nurses. She is very upset as she seems to want both men. After Stephen leaves, she marries this man, astounded that Stephen didn't approve of the arrangement and felt neglected.. At the close of the book Stephen is divorced again and the three of them and her children are spending happy times together.
I know Jane Hawking didn't appear to come across this way but much of her writing I found just plain irritating.
This book has been described as optimistic and inspiring, but it seemed to me that the writer was very negative, complaining and demanding sympathy. There were many great challenges in her life and the reader could be more sympathetic if she wasn't complaining about everyday stresses that most everyone experiences.
She knew Stephen's medical condition when they married, but blames her time caring for him on delaying her work on her PHD in Spanish literature. But she describes endless concerts, parties, dinners, picnics, ballet shows, travel, renovating a number of their homes and making gardens. She complains about her in-laws as not being helpful enough although they did help, and so did her relatives, friends, students, government agencies and the University. Not many people as caregivers for severely disabled relatives have such wealth or resources.
She was happy when she moves her "platonic" lover into the home with Stephen and the children. Then goes on trips to Europe with this man and attends many musical events with him.
She is annoyed when Stephen receives medals and honours, and mentions that only twice she received gifts at these events. She is furious when Steven's sister asks her if her third child is Steven's or the live in boyfriend. She lacks self-awareness and seems to feel entitled and resentful of her husband's fame. After 25 years marriage Stephen announces he is divorcing her to marry one of his nurses. She is very upset as she seems to want both men. After Stephen leaves, she marries this man, astounded that Stephen didn't approve of the arrangement and felt neglected.. At the close of the book Stephen is divorced again and the three of them and her children are spending happy times together.
I know Jane Hawking didn't appear to come across this way but much of her writing I found just plain irritating.
February 22, 2015
A compelling story written by Jane Hawking the wife of Stephen Hawking for 25 years. Didn't know what to expect since I, like most, have been fascinated by the life and challenges of Stephen Hawking and his rock star image. Relationships, in general are complicated, and when you add Stephen's motor-neuron disorder and genius, Jane and Stephen's relationship becomes even more complicated. Despite his brilliance, Stephen is human. Jane writes of his bravery, inspiration and arrogance. I felt myself in awe of Stephen's mental capacity but not liking him as a person. Interestingly, its the same way I felt after reading about Steve Jobs. Jane stays in their relationship for the love of their family and deserved better than watching Stephen leave her for one of his nurses.
We are often reminded how it is often impossible to know what its like to live in someone else's shoes. Stephen Hawking is on the top of that list and I found myself more than willing to excuse any and all of his flaws. Stephen Hawking is one of the truly fascinating men of the last 100 years. It's hard to imagine what it must be like to be Stephen Hawking. That we can never understand.
Finally, this is an incredible story but I found something missing that keeps me from calling it a great book.
We are often reminded how it is often impossible to know what its like to live in someone else's shoes. Stephen Hawking is on the top of that list and I found myself more than willing to excuse any and all of his flaws. Stephen Hawking is one of the truly fascinating men of the last 100 years. It's hard to imagine what it must be like to be Stephen Hawking. That we can never understand.
Finally, this is an incredible story but I found something missing that keeps me from calling it a great book.
November 30, 2015
Actually read the book after I had seen the movie. Always interesting to see what they include from the book. Enjoyed both but think I enjoyed the movie best.
August 25, 2015
I had no idea when deciding to read this book that I had RSVP'd to a 487 page pity party.
June 29, 2021
Chúng ta không nên trông đợi đây là một cuốn hồi ký tập trung vào sự nghiệp của Stephen Hawking mà là một câu chuyện dài về bệnh tật, về quan hệ gia đình bên cạnh những thành tựu của một thiên tài. Jane Hawking, vợ của Stephen Hawking đã có vô số những tranh đấu và thách thức với bản thân để hoàn thành cuốn hồi ký nặng trĩu này mặc dù đây chỉ là những rút gọn của cuốn hồi ký gốc. Cho dù thế thì chúng ta cũng không thể phủ nhận rằng bà là một nhà ngôn ngữ ưu tú khi dẫn dắt độc giả đi đến tận cùng quyển sách mà khó có thể bắt bẻ được ngôn từ hoặc cách hành văn vô cùng uyển chuyển. Có lẽ vì những năm tháng nghiên cứu ngôn ngữ từ trung cổ đến hiện đại cùng khả năng cảm thụ âm nhạc sâu sắc mà cuốn hồi ký rõ ràng tải được những cảm biến nội tâm đến những tác động bên ngoài vào cuộc sống, sự nghiệp và cả nhân cách của mỗi người trong đó.
Jane Hawking đã phải đối mặt với những khoảng cách, khác biệt và có phần lập dị từ phía gia đình Stephen ngay cả trong những thứ nhỏ nhất như sở thích cá nhân hoặc vài trò giải trí. Kỷ niệm tình yêu với Stephen cũng không nhiều những khoảnh khắc ngọt ngào, lãng mạn mà chỉ quẩn quanh vài buổi tiệc khiêu vũ và xem nhạc kịch. Những khinh miệt và sự quay lưng từ gia đình ông đối với nỗ lực của bà kéo dài suốt quãng thời gian 25 năm trong cuộc hôn nhân với Stephen.
Năm 1963, Stephen bị chẩn đoán mắc bệnh thần kinh vận động khiến ông dần dần trở thành người khuyết tật. Mặc dù được tiên lượng rằng cuộc sống của ông chỉ kéo dài khoảng 2 năm nhưng Stephen đã đi tiếp một chặng đường dài cả về thể chất lẫn trí tuệ đến tận năm 2018 khiến ông trở thành một hiện tượng y học, thậm chí ông còn kịp có một chuyến du hành trên con tàu không trọng lượng và trở về Trái Đất. Điều đó trả lời cho rất nhiều phê bình phản bác trước đó và “Stephen vẫn đặt được bước chân đầu tiên trên con đường hợp nhất các ngành vật lý , sự hoà hợp giữa cấu trúc vĩ mô của vũ trụ với cấu trúc vĩ mô của nguyên tử thông qua phương tiện trung gian là lỗ đen”. Để rồi ông luôn đắm chìm vào địa hạt lý thuyết vũ trụ, lánh mình khỏi cuộc sống thực tế và gia đình.
Jane đã không hề thoái chí trước tương lai mờ mịt đó mà chấp nhận từ bỏ những hoài bão riêng trước đây, đồng hành cùng Stephen với bệnh tật, với những di chuyển liên tục giữa các nước từ Tây Ban Nha, Áo, Pháp và nhiều nhất là đi đi về về giữa Cambridge và California. Sự chuyển đổi chỗ ở liên tục là một gánh nặng với Jane cùng người chồng tàn tật và 3 đứa con. Trong khi Stephen luôn được nâng niu, tâng bốc và luôn được chăm sóc về mặt thể xác như với một đứa bé thì Jane phải vừa là tài xế, y tá, hầu gái, phiên dịch và là người vợ. Bà tự thỏa hiệp rằng những điều này là chiều hướng chung của cuộc sống gia đình và công việc làm vợ, làm mẹ là chiếc vé một chiều đến sự đơn độc trong nội tâm.
Càng về sau, những cuộc thảo luận trong gia đình lại càng mang tính cá nhân, gây chia rẽ và tổn thương. Gia đình ông thì luôn tách biệt và tự cho rằng trí tuệ của họ vượt trội so với phần còn lại của loài người. Vì họ luôn nghi ngờ và sợ hãi nên bà không thể tìm kiếm sự ủng hộ từ họ. Nếu Stephen luôn lang thang trong vũ trụ về mặt tinh thần để tìm hiểu về cách vận hành của nó thì bà lại du hành với những tinh hoa khác trong ngôn ngữ và thơ ca, tuyệt nhiên đơn độc không sự chia sẻ từ chồng. Jane chỉ có thể chia sẻ mọi nỗi niềm đó cùng Jonathan, một nhạc trưởng và sau này trở thành người chồng thứ 2 của bà sau khi ly hôn với Stephen.
Bất chấp những khó khăn, cực nhọc, cả điều tiếng và tuyệt vọng, Jane đã có một hành trình không ngắn và đủ dài cùng ông, để hiểu tường tận con người, phẩm chất, trí tuệ cũng như những điều bất bình thường ở ông. Bà trải qua rất nhiều những chuyến đi cho dù sợ máy bay để cùng ông đến các hội thảo và cuộc họp. Bà tranh đấu để có những nơi chốn tiện nghi cho gia đình và đòi quyền cho người khuyết tật. Vì châm ngôn của Stephen là “ Nếu có bệnh tật trong nhà thì sẽ chẳng còn chỗ cho các vấn đề tâm lý nữa” mà bà đã nỗ lực biết bao trong bổn phận của mình. Bà đánh đổi lòng tự tôn để Stephen có thể làm chủ lịch sử 15 ngàn triệu năm của vũ trụ, để thành hậu duệ của Einstein, trở thành 1 nhân vật tầm thế giới, là tiến sĩ danh dự cùng bao giải thưởng, Huân huy chương cao quý từ các đại học, hoàng gia, viện nghiên cứu khoa học trên khắp thế giới.
Mình cho rằng đây là một cuốn hồi ký khiêm nhường mặc dù ai cũng biết việc làm vợ của một thiên tài là công việc không hề đơn giản huống hồ Stephen còn là một thiên tài khuyết tật. Sự bất mãn trong cuộc sống hôn nhân của Jane dù bị đẩy đến đỉnh điểm nhưng bà vẫn nhìn Stephen bằng cái nhìn tích cực nhất cùng với niềm tự hào hãnh diện to lớn. Không thể chối bỏ quá khứ nhưng không ràng buộc bởi thành tựu, bà sống khá trọn vẹn trong vai trò mình đã chọn, vẫn luôn bên cạnh ông khi cần cho đến tận cuối. Nếu Stephen xem lỗ đen của vũ trụ là mục đích sống của ông thì Jane lại lần mò ý nghĩa của cuộc sống trong lỗ đen của chính nó. Để rồi cuối cùng nhận ra: không có gì đáng giá bằng một cuộc sống bình thường.
Jane Hawking đã phải đối mặt với những khoảng cách, khác biệt và có phần lập dị từ phía gia đình Stephen ngay cả trong những thứ nhỏ nhất như sở thích cá nhân hoặc vài trò giải trí. Kỷ niệm tình yêu với Stephen cũng không nhiều những khoảnh khắc ngọt ngào, lãng mạn mà chỉ quẩn quanh vài buổi tiệc khiêu vũ và xem nhạc kịch. Những khinh miệt và sự quay lưng từ gia đình ông đối với nỗ lực của bà kéo dài suốt quãng thời gian 25 năm trong cuộc hôn nhân với Stephen.
Năm 1963, Stephen bị chẩn đoán mắc bệnh thần kinh vận động khiến ông dần dần trở thành người khuyết tật. Mặc dù được tiên lượng rằng cuộc sống của ông chỉ kéo dài khoảng 2 năm nhưng Stephen đã đi tiếp một chặng đường dài cả về thể chất lẫn trí tuệ đến tận năm 2018 khiến ông trở thành một hiện tượng y học, thậm chí ông còn kịp có một chuyến du hành trên con tàu không trọng lượng và trở về Trái Đất. Điều đó trả lời cho rất nhiều phê bình phản bác trước đó và “Stephen vẫn đặt được bước chân đầu tiên trên con đường hợp nhất các ngành vật lý , sự hoà hợp giữa cấu trúc vĩ mô của vũ trụ với cấu trúc vĩ mô của nguyên tử thông qua phương tiện trung gian là lỗ đen”. Để rồi ông luôn đắm chìm vào địa hạt lý thuyết vũ trụ, lánh mình khỏi cuộc sống thực tế và gia đình.
Jane đã không hề thoái chí trước tương lai mờ mịt đó mà chấp nhận từ bỏ những hoài bão riêng trước đây, đồng hành cùng Stephen với bệnh tật, với những di chuyển liên tục giữa các nước từ Tây Ban Nha, Áo, Pháp và nhiều nhất là đi đi về về giữa Cambridge và California. Sự chuyển đổi chỗ ở liên tục là một gánh nặng với Jane cùng người chồng tàn tật và 3 đứa con. Trong khi Stephen luôn được nâng niu, tâng bốc và luôn được chăm sóc về mặt thể xác như với một đứa bé thì Jane phải vừa là tài xế, y tá, hầu gái, phiên dịch và là người vợ. Bà tự thỏa hiệp rằng những điều này là chiều hướng chung của cuộc sống gia đình và công việc làm vợ, làm mẹ là chiếc vé một chiều đến sự đơn độc trong nội tâm.
Càng về sau, những cuộc thảo luận trong gia đình lại càng mang tính cá nhân, gây chia rẽ và tổn thương. Gia đình ông thì luôn tách biệt và tự cho rằng trí tuệ của họ vượt trội so với phần còn lại của loài người. Vì họ luôn nghi ngờ và sợ hãi nên bà không thể tìm kiếm sự ủng hộ từ họ. Nếu Stephen luôn lang thang trong vũ trụ về mặt tinh thần để tìm hiểu về cách vận hành của nó thì bà lại du hành với những tinh hoa khác trong ngôn ngữ và thơ ca, tuyệt nhiên đơn độc không sự chia sẻ từ chồng. Jane chỉ có thể chia sẻ mọi nỗi niềm đó cùng Jonathan, một nhạc trưởng và sau này trở thành người chồng thứ 2 của bà sau khi ly hôn với Stephen.
Bất chấp những khó khăn, cực nhọc, cả điều tiếng và tuyệt vọng, Jane đã có một hành trình không ngắn và đủ dài cùng ông, để hiểu tường tận con người, phẩm chất, trí tuệ cũng như những điều bất bình thường ở ông. Bà trải qua rất nhiều những chuyến đi cho dù sợ máy bay để cùng ông đến các hội thảo và cuộc họp. Bà tranh đấu để có những nơi chốn tiện nghi cho gia đình và đòi quyền cho người khuyết tật. Vì châm ngôn của Stephen là “ Nếu có bệnh tật trong nhà thì sẽ chẳng còn chỗ cho các vấn đề tâm lý nữa” mà bà đã nỗ lực biết bao trong bổn phận của mình. Bà đánh đổi lòng tự tôn để Stephen có thể làm chủ lịch sử 15 ngàn triệu năm của vũ trụ, để thành hậu duệ của Einstein, trở thành 1 nhân vật tầm thế giới, là tiến sĩ danh dự cùng bao giải thưởng, Huân huy chương cao quý từ các đại học, hoàng gia, viện nghiên cứu khoa học trên khắp thế giới.
Mình cho rằng đây là một cuốn hồi ký khiêm nhường mặc dù ai cũng biết việc làm vợ của một thiên tài là công việc không hề đơn giản huống hồ Stephen còn là một thiên tài khuyết tật. Sự bất mãn trong cuộc sống hôn nhân của Jane dù bị đẩy đến đỉnh điểm nhưng bà vẫn nhìn Stephen bằng cái nhìn tích cực nhất cùng với niềm tự hào hãnh diện to lớn. Không thể chối bỏ quá khứ nhưng không ràng buộc bởi thành tựu, bà sống khá trọn vẹn trong vai trò mình đã chọn, vẫn luôn bên cạnh ông khi cần cho đến tận cuối. Nếu Stephen xem lỗ đen của vũ trụ là mục đích sống của ông thì Jane lại lần mò ý nghĩa của cuộc sống trong lỗ đen của chính nó. Để rồi cuối cùng nhận ra: không có gì đáng giá bằng một cuộc sống bình thường.
November 16, 2014
This is a book about Stephen Hawking's courtship and marriage to Jane Hawking, and their family life. Jane married Stephen when he was newly diagnosed with motor neuron disease and given about two years to live. That was over 40 years ago and he's still alive. She was terribly burdened with his care, on top of taking care of three children, without much money. She has genuine, legitimate complaints about his treating her like a slave? So why is she so irritating? I think it's because she has so little self-awareness. She never delves into why she might have decided to marry a man with a serious, life-threatening disease, never a hint that it might have seemed glamorous or noble to her. She does seem to have been smitten with him -- his feelings for her are much less apparent. He needs her but he seems as often irritated with her as loving.
It is striking how old-fashioned her attitudes are. It sometimes feels like an early 20th century book. She views her role almost entirely as mother and wife. Yes, she does manage to complete a PhD, but the time is stolen from an endless round of teas, birthday parties, and other forms of entertainment. Really? She has to do all of this? It seems that she takes pleasure in this role but also complains about it. There is hardly a mention of any real communication between Jane and Stephen, except in their joint commitment to some political causes.
Finally she meets John, who loves and values her. Because she's committed to Stephen and the children, she absolutely won't leave him, and the new man becomes part of the household. apparently with Stephen's consent. It's hinted but not made explicit that Stephen is no longer able to have sexual relations with her -- although she did become pregnant by him a few years earlier. That episode is recounted by her saying that she wasn't always careful about birth control. What?! They're having sex? He's not just her fourth child? She is furious at his sister asking if the child is John's, although it seems a reasonable question, if intrusive. The bizarre thing is that Jane is baffled to learn after a few years that Stephen apparently wasn't happy with the new arrangement. It is this kind of obtuseness that makes her so annoying.
But as a picture of their home life, and what it's like to be married to a "great man," it's fairly compelling. And she does get her revenge on the evil nurse who manipulated him into leaving Jane and marrying him, and we do learn that apparently THEY were having sex.
It is striking how old-fashioned her attitudes are. It sometimes feels like an early 20th century book. She views her role almost entirely as mother and wife. Yes, she does manage to complete a PhD, but the time is stolen from an endless round of teas, birthday parties, and other forms of entertainment. Really? She has to do all of this? It seems that she takes pleasure in this role but also complains about it. There is hardly a mention of any real communication between Jane and Stephen, except in their joint commitment to some political causes.
Finally she meets John, who loves and values her. Because she's committed to Stephen and the children, she absolutely won't leave him, and the new man becomes part of the household. apparently with Stephen's consent. It's hinted but not made explicit that Stephen is no longer able to have sexual relations with her -- although she did become pregnant by him a few years earlier. That episode is recounted by her saying that she wasn't always careful about birth control. What?! They're having sex? He's not just her fourth child? She is furious at his sister asking if the child is John's, although it seems a reasonable question, if intrusive. The bizarre thing is that Jane is baffled to learn after a few years that Stephen apparently wasn't happy with the new arrangement. It is this kind of obtuseness that makes her so annoying.
But as a picture of their home life, and what it's like to be married to a "great man," it's fairly compelling. And she does get her revenge on the evil nurse who manipulated him into leaving Jane and marrying him, and we do learn that apparently THEY were having sex.
January 12, 2015
**3.5 - 4 stars**
This was an absolutely fascinating read – Of course I have followed Stephen Hawking’s story just like everybody else, he always struck me as quite an enigmatic character but apart from his public persona I did not know a great deal. And I knew nothing of Jane Hawking, his first wife, who in this memoir tells it as it was for her and it is at turns emotional, funny and very engaging.
It is a love story, it is also the story of two people coming together and making a life, a life that is difficult and expected to be short lived. Jane Hawking does not pull punches with her narrative, but shows her inner strength in the face of adversity, both the good and the bad things that happen are told with an open honesty and a tendency to be blunt that is very appealing.
Of course this is a very personal story – as such I found myself wondering how much of it was coloured by what came later – I can’t say that Stephen Hawking came across as terribly likeable overall – although of course very brave, absolutely determined and often inspiring. Added to that was a sense of the arrogance that extraordinarily intelligent people can have, his disregard for Jane’s belief system and his impatience with other people is sitting right there, sometimes making me shake my head. Jane herself is not always likeable, which I guess shows that she wrote honestly even about herself, but I admired her grit and total and absolute love for her family that kept her going through some difficult times.
The science was intriguing, the lifespan of the relationship and marriage entirely compelling, the slow disintigration of health is sad yet strangely empowering as Stephen fights on regardless, so overall a terrific read if a little long winded and dry upon occasion, for the most part it was entirely bewitching.
I have not seen the movie as yet – The Theory of Everything, as I understand it, takes the more romantic aspects of the story told here and creates a rather wonderful film. I shall look forward to seeing it, however I am very pleased that I read this first as I believe right here is where you will find the most truth, even if skewed by being told by only one side of the equation.
Definitely recommended for fans of Non Fiction and anyone with an interest in a real life lived.
Happy Reading Folks!
This was an absolutely fascinating read – Of course I have followed Stephen Hawking’s story just like everybody else, he always struck me as quite an enigmatic character but apart from his public persona I did not know a great deal. And I knew nothing of Jane Hawking, his first wife, who in this memoir tells it as it was for her and it is at turns emotional, funny and very engaging.
It is a love story, it is also the story of two people coming together and making a life, a life that is difficult and expected to be short lived. Jane Hawking does not pull punches with her narrative, but shows her inner strength in the face of adversity, both the good and the bad things that happen are told with an open honesty and a tendency to be blunt that is very appealing.
Of course this is a very personal story – as such I found myself wondering how much of it was coloured by what came later – I can’t say that Stephen Hawking came across as terribly likeable overall – although of course very brave, absolutely determined and often inspiring. Added to that was a sense of the arrogance that extraordinarily intelligent people can have, his disregard for Jane’s belief system and his impatience with other people is sitting right there, sometimes making me shake my head. Jane herself is not always likeable, which I guess shows that she wrote honestly even about herself, but I admired her grit and total and absolute love for her family that kept her going through some difficult times.
The science was intriguing, the lifespan of the relationship and marriage entirely compelling, the slow disintigration of health is sad yet strangely empowering as Stephen fights on regardless, so overall a terrific read if a little long winded and dry upon occasion, for the most part it was entirely bewitching.
I have not seen the movie as yet – The Theory of Everything, as I understand it, takes the more romantic aspects of the story told here and creates a rather wonderful film. I shall look forward to seeing it, however I am very pleased that I read this first as I believe right here is where you will find the most truth, even if skewed by being told by only one side of the equation.
Definitely recommended for fans of Non Fiction and anyone with an interest in a real life lived.
Happy Reading Folks!
March 21, 2021
❤️«Mi vida con Stephen se había construido sobre la fe: fe en su valor y, su genialidad fe en nuestros esfuerzos conjuntos y, en último término fe religiosa».
🤗Fue mi primer acercamiento con este género literario y no morí en el intento, al contrario me gustó muchísimo como para buscar alguna otra. Esta autobiografía no fue para nada aburrida, ni complicada, tampoco abrumadora o tediosa esta muy bien estructurada y sobrepaso mis expectativas.
🛑En este punto quiero aclarar dos cosas la primera es que si bien hay una película "basada en este libro" no tiene para nada relación alguna pues esta autobiografía es de JANE y no de STEPHEN sin embargo, en la película si toma ese enfoque nos presentan la vida del científico y el desarrollo de su enfermedad pero, omiten muchas otras circunstancias. Así que si te llamo la atención el libro porque haz visto la película quizá no cumpla completamente con tus expectativas (o quizá te guste más el libro como en mi caso). Esto me lleva al segundo punto y es que yo tenía mucha curiosidad por conocer - parte - de la vida del tan famoso científico y su familia por ello fue que me decidí a comprar el libro y leerlo.
🌌En cuatro partes Jane nos abre la puerta de su corazón y nos relata de inicio a fin la relación que existió entre Stephen y ella. Uno puede percibir el coraje, la valentía, inteligencia y el amor que Jane tuvo hacia su ex-esposo y su familia. Hay muchas situaciones en donde te preguntarás ¿cómo es posible?.
CALIFICACIÓN:
⭐⭐⭐️⭐️⭐️ /5
📚No olvides pasarte por mi cuenta de instagram @dreamers_of_serendipity para una reseña más completa.
🤗Fue mi primer acercamiento con este género literario y no morí en el intento, al contrario me gustó muchísimo como para buscar alguna otra. Esta autobiografía no fue para nada aburrida, ni complicada, tampoco abrumadora o tediosa esta muy bien estructurada y sobrepaso mis expectativas.
🛑En este punto quiero aclarar dos cosas la primera es que si bien hay una película "basada en este libro" no tiene para nada relación alguna pues esta autobiografía es de JANE y no de STEPHEN sin embargo, en la película si toma ese enfoque nos presentan la vida del científico y el desarrollo de su enfermedad pero, omiten muchas otras circunstancias. Así que si te llamo la atención el libro porque haz visto la película quizá no cumpla completamente con tus expectativas (o quizá te guste más el libro como en mi caso). Esto me lleva al segundo punto y es que yo tenía mucha curiosidad por conocer - parte - de la vida del tan famoso científico y su familia por ello fue que me decidí a comprar el libro y leerlo.
🌌En cuatro partes Jane nos abre la puerta de su corazón y nos relata de inicio a fin la relación que existió entre Stephen y ella. Uno puede percibir el coraje, la valentía, inteligencia y el amor que Jane tuvo hacia su ex-esposo y su familia. Hay muchas situaciones en donde te preguntarás ¿cómo es posible?.
CALIFICACIÓN:
⭐⭐⭐️⭐️⭐️ /5
📚No olvides pasarte por mi cuenta de instagram @dreamers_of_serendipity para una reseña más completa.
March 18, 2015
3.5 Stars
June 29, 2018
I let out a long sigh of relief when I finished this book because it is so long and tedious. I was shocked to learn that it is “the abridged version of the original memoir” (405) which ran to over 600 pages! I guess I should be grateful my book club chose this version!
This memoir by Jane Hawking is the story of her life with the world-famous physicist, Stephen Hawking. She describes their first encounters, their courtship, and their 25-year marriage. The focus is on her struggles to cope with her husband’s increasing dependence as his body degenerated while simultaneously meeting the needs of their three children. In a postlude, she briefly describes their lives after their divorce.
The book needs a thorough editing. There is too much discussion of irrelevant material. For example, does the reader really need to know that Jane “found many similarities between the kharjas and the cantigas de amigo, which were possibly the result of Mozarabic migrations northward” (200) or that Castilian villancicos are full of medieval iconography symbolizing the multiplicity of the aspects of love (236)? Why is a two-page biography of Newton included (331-332)? In a memoir, I don’t expect to read that “In the thirteenth century, Alfonso the Wise of Castile expanded the role of Toledo as a major centre for translation” (103). After a while, the impression is that the author is trying to convince us of her erudition.
Then there’s the needless repetition. How often must we read about the difficulties she experienced trying to write her thesis, the problems she had with Stephen’s nurses, the fatigue she suffered, the thin veneer of normality they tried to maintain, or the innocence of her relationship with Jonathan? With the latter, a quote from Hamlet came to mind: "The lady doth protest too much, methinks.” At times the book reads like a series of lists: we get lists of friends, lists of places where she and Stephen travelled for conferences, lists of social functions she hosted, lists of concerts she attended, etc.
Undoubtedly, Jane faced great challenges and deserves recognition for her role in Stephen’s life. By caring for him and the family as she did, she aided his advancement in his pursuits. By just describing what she did, she would earn the reader’s respect and sympathy. The problem is that instead of letting her story speak for itself, she whines and complains. At times the book seems one long complaint. Everything has to come back to her. She is upset because she didn’t receive gifts when Stephen received honours. She wants sympathy because she had the shingles. She becomes so agitated when people question her about Tim’s father after she has brought another man into the household? This constant tone of “Woe is me” makes her seem selfish and petty and draws attention away from her unquestionable accomplishments.
What the reader is not given in the book is a real understanding of the relationship between Stephen and Jane. Listing her responsibilities and Stephen’s accomplishments does little to show how the two of them were together. Stephen does not come across very positively: he was intellectually arrogant; he was utterly absorbed in physics to the detriment of his family; he needed to be the centre of attention; he was dismissive of Jane’s interests; and he was uncommunicative. As I’ve already stated, Jane comes across as whiny. At the beginning, she describes herself as someone “who managed to see the funny side of situations” and was “fairly shy, yet not averse to expressing . . . opinions” (6), yet her sense of humour seems non-existent and one of her problems is her self-effacement. She also shows little self-awareness because she implies that she is a victim, that this life just happened to her, whereas she made a choice to marry Stephen knowing his diagnosis and the prognosis. I’m left with a question: did she marry Stephen because she loved him? Theirs does not seem to be a great love affair. From the beginning, their relationship seems detached, certainly not passionate. She seems to stay with Stephen out of a sense of obligation, more than love.
The book jacket mentions the author’s “candour” but I found her often evasive. For instance, when mentioning Stephen’s nurse, who became his second wife, Jane says, “Probably with her he had found someone tougher than me with whom he could again somehow have a physical relationship” (378). So Jane and Stephen were no longer intimate? Later, she says, “Flames of vituperation, hatred, desire for revenge leapt at me from all sides, scorching me to the quick with accusations” (379). All sides?
On the topic of editing, I may come across as petty, but I must point out the careless proofreading of the book: “they behaved with caution and towed the party line” (149) and “Irritatingly their gossip was as pervasive as the smoke from their cigarettes, I and found myself compelled to listen” (170) and “Both her age and her sex enabled her to avoid the some of the pressures” (226) and “In conclusion the author looked forward to the time when mankind would able to ‘know the mind of God’” (289). And how about sentences with seven prepositional phrases: “At Cern Stephen would be working on the implications for the direction of the arrow of time of quantum theory and of the observations from the particle accelerator (286-287). And what editor would allow the phrase “the elderly Indian squaw” (91)?!
The reason I tend to avoid memoirs is that they are inevitably one-sided. I prefer to get several perspectives since the truth usually lies somewhere in the middle of each person’s version of events. An article I read stated, “Jane decided it was time to answer her critics with a final definitive description of the marriage, purging the bitterness occasioned by the 'horrendously painful' divorce that tainted the first book” (http://www.stuff.co.nz/entertainment/...). This begs the question: what bias taints this book? The film The Theory of Everything was apparently based on this memoir, but the film is not faithful to the book. Is the book faithful to what really happened?
Anyone looking for real insight into the relationship between Stephen Hawking and his first wife will not find it here. The book is a long and tiresome read; consequently, its effect is not to give the author the respect and recognition she craves and deserves.
Please check out my reader's blog (https://schatjesshelves.blogspot.com/) and follow me on Twitter (@DCYakabuski).
This memoir by Jane Hawking is the story of her life with the world-famous physicist, Stephen Hawking. She describes their first encounters, their courtship, and their 25-year marriage. The focus is on her struggles to cope with her husband’s increasing dependence as his body degenerated while simultaneously meeting the needs of their three children. In a postlude, she briefly describes their lives after their divorce.
The book needs a thorough editing. There is too much discussion of irrelevant material. For example, does the reader really need to know that Jane “found many similarities between the kharjas and the cantigas de amigo, which were possibly the result of Mozarabic migrations northward” (200) or that Castilian villancicos are full of medieval iconography symbolizing the multiplicity of the aspects of love (236)? Why is a two-page biography of Newton included (331-332)? In a memoir, I don’t expect to read that “In the thirteenth century, Alfonso the Wise of Castile expanded the role of Toledo as a major centre for translation” (103). After a while, the impression is that the author is trying to convince us of her erudition.
Then there’s the needless repetition. How often must we read about the difficulties she experienced trying to write her thesis, the problems she had with Stephen’s nurses, the fatigue she suffered, the thin veneer of normality they tried to maintain, or the innocence of her relationship with Jonathan? With the latter, a quote from Hamlet came to mind: "The lady doth protest too much, methinks.” At times the book reads like a series of lists: we get lists of friends, lists of places where she and Stephen travelled for conferences, lists of social functions she hosted, lists of concerts she attended, etc.
Undoubtedly, Jane faced great challenges and deserves recognition for her role in Stephen’s life. By caring for him and the family as she did, she aided his advancement in his pursuits. By just describing what she did, she would earn the reader’s respect and sympathy. The problem is that instead of letting her story speak for itself, she whines and complains. At times the book seems one long complaint. Everything has to come back to her. She is upset because she didn’t receive gifts when Stephen received honours. She wants sympathy because she had the shingles. She becomes so agitated when people question her about Tim’s father after she has brought another man into the household? This constant tone of “Woe is me” makes her seem selfish and petty and draws attention away from her unquestionable accomplishments.
What the reader is not given in the book is a real understanding of the relationship between Stephen and Jane. Listing her responsibilities and Stephen’s accomplishments does little to show how the two of them were together. Stephen does not come across very positively: he was intellectually arrogant; he was utterly absorbed in physics to the detriment of his family; he needed to be the centre of attention; he was dismissive of Jane’s interests; and he was uncommunicative. As I’ve already stated, Jane comes across as whiny. At the beginning, she describes herself as someone “who managed to see the funny side of situations” and was “fairly shy, yet not averse to expressing . . . opinions” (6), yet her sense of humour seems non-existent and one of her problems is her self-effacement. She also shows little self-awareness because she implies that she is a victim, that this life just happened to her, whereas she made a choice to marry Stephen knowing his diagnosis and the prognosis. I’m left with a question: did she marry Stephen because she loved him? Theirs does not seem to be a great love affair. From the beginning, their relationship seems detached, certainly not passionate. She seems to stay with Stephen out of a sense of obligation, more than love.
The book jacket mentions the author’s “candour” but I found her often evasive. For instance, when mentioning Stephen’s nurse, who became his second wife, Jane says, “Probably with her he had found someone tougher than me with whom he could again somehow have a physical relationship” (378). So Jane and Stephen were no longer intimate? Later, she says, “Flames of vituperation, hatred, desire for revenge leapt at me from all sides, scorching me to the quick with accusations” (379). All sides?
On the topic of editing, I may come across as petty, but I must point out the careless proofreading of the book: “they behaved with caution and towed the party line” (149) and “Irritatingly their gossip was as pervasive as the smoke from their cigarettes, I and found myself compelled to listen” (170) and “Both her age and her sex enabled her to avoid the some of the pressures” (226) and “In conclusion the author looked forward to the time when mankind would able to ‘know the mind of God’” (289). And how about sentences with seven prepositional phrases: “At Cern Stephen would be working on the implications for the direction of the arrow of time of quantum theory and of the observations from the particle accelerator (286-287). And what editor would allow the phrase “the elderly Indian squaw” (91)?!
The reason I tend to avoid memoirs is that they are inevitably one-sided. I prefer to get several perspectives since the truth usually lies somewhere in the middle of each person’s version of events. An article I read stated, “Jane decided it was time to answer her critics with a final definitive description of the marriage, purging the bitterness occasioned by the 'horrendously painful' divorce that tainted the first book” (http://www.stuff.co.nz/entertainment/...). This begs the question: what bias taints this book? The film The Theory of Everything was apparently based on this memoir, but the film is not faithful to the book. Is the book faithful to what really happened?
Anyone looking for real insight into the relationship between Stephen Hawking and his first wife will not find it here. The book is a long and tiresome read; consequently, its effect is not to give the author the respect and recognition she craves and deserves.
Please check out my reader's blog (https://schatjesshelves.blogspot.com/) and follow me on Twitter (@DCYakabuski).
May 31, 2022
Hace unos días vi la película y quise saber un poco más de sus vidas. Me ha gustado mucho, es una historia con mucha sinceridad y humanismo. Me llamó muchísimo la atención el poco apoyo que recibía la familia y todo lo que tuvo que aplazar y sacrificar Jane para que todos salieran adelante,sobre todo Stephen,que muy reconocido.
May 15, 2018
Foi interessante conhecer a trajetória do Stephen Hawking a partir do olhar de sua esposa, Jane Hawking. Sabe aquele ditado "por trás de um grande homem...". Pois é. Tudo verdade!!
É incrível o que ela passou, o que ela abriu mão e o pouco reconhecimento por parte do próprio Stephen. Até dou um desconto porque um gênio como ele tinha que ter algum tipo de transtorno social.
O que me incomodou no livro foram as intermináveis descrições (principalmente de paisagens) e a necessidade de ela afirmar sua crença religiosa e de ressaltar a crença de alguns cientistas e pesquisadores... chato. Também achei que o final foi meio apressado. Consegue-se perceber o rancor que ainda restou, apesar do tempo e dos encaminhamentos na vida de ambos.
"... e enquanto todo mundo elogiava sua coragem e seu brilho - em uma terra onde o sucesso é adorado e a insuficiência lamentada -, ela dissera a si mesma que devia haver alguém igualmente corajoso por trás dele, ou simplesmente ele não estaria ali."
"Eu o amava por sua coragem, sua inteligência, seu senso de ridículo e absurdo, e aquele seu terrível carisma que lhe permitia - e ainda permite - enrolar a maioria das pessoas, inclusive a mim, em volta de seu dedo mindinho. Então eu alcancei o que me propus a alcançar - dedicar-me a Stephen, dando-lhe a chance de realizar sua genialidade. Contudo, no processo, eu estava começando a perder a minha identidade."
É incrível o que ela passou, o que ela abriu mão e o pouco reconhecimento por parte do próprio Stephen. Até dou um desconto porque um gênio como ele tinha que ter algum tipo de transtorno social.
O que me incomodou no livro foram as intermináveis descrições (principalmente de paisagens) e a necessidade de ela afirmar sua crença religiosa e de ressaltar a crença de alguns cientistas e pesquisadores... chato. Também achei que o final foi meio apressado. Consegue-se perceber o rancor que ainda restou, apesar do tempo e dos encaminhamentos na vida de ambos.
"... e enquanto todo mundo elogiava sua coragem e seu brilho - em uma terra onde o sucesso é adorado e a insuficiência lamentada -, ela dissera a si mesma que devia haver alguém igualmente corajoso por trás dele, ou simplesmente ele não estaria ali."
"Eu o amava por sua coragem, sua inteligência, seu senso de ridículo e absurdo, e aquele seu terrível carisma que lhe permitia - e ainda permite - enrolar a maioria das pessoas, inclusive a mim, em volta de seu dedo mindinho. Então eu alcancei o que me propus a alcançar - dedicar-me a Stephen, dando-lhe a chance de realizar sua genialidade. Contudo, no processo, eu estava começando a perder a minha identidade."
January 2, 2020
Some parts of this were incredibly interesting and well written which is why I've given this book an overall 3 star rating. However, I found this book had little to do with her life with Stephen, in fact i feel this book only complains about how she had to look after someone who was EXTREMELY DISABLED. There's barely anything about his character or who he was as a person. The way she describes him is only when she found him 'unbareable' or when he was being 'difficult'. Basically this book was written so she could get some sympathy because her like was a big, sad mess where she barely had any time to herself and was constantly overlooked. Poor her, no one would pay her any attention :( /s.
August 21, 2020
7 de 10*
Há muito tempo que tenho curiosidade em ler este livro. Porque Stephen Hawking granjeou um lugar no mundo difícil de atingir. Como é que o corpo que aloja uma mente brilhante o pode trair desta maneira? Contra todos os prognósticos e esperanças, Stephen sobreviveu a uma doença totalmente incapacitante e trouxe luz sobre muito do que se sabe sobre física nos dias de hoje.
Comentário completo em:
https://abibliotecadajoao.blogspot.co...
Há muito tempo que tenho curiosidade em ler este livro. Porque Stephen Hawking granjeou um lugar no mundo difícil de atingir. Como é que o corpo que aloja uma mente brilhante o pode trair desta maneira? Contra todos os prognósticos e esperanças, Stephen sobreviveu a uma doença totalmente incapacitante e trouxe luz sobre muito do que se sabe sobre física nos dias de hoje.
Comentário completo em:
https://abibliotecadajoao.blogspot.co...
January 11, 2015
I have never read something so in depth before. To hear the struggles the whole family have had to go through was inspiring,inspiring to see that at the end of it all they both could stay friends,i wish sometimes my Marriage had gone that way. But then again being controlled is not what a woman wants in life. Really want to see the Movie now to see how they can put a Brilliant Read into a Motion Picture..
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