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To Hate Like This Is to Be Happy Forever: A Thoroughly Obsessive, Intermittently Uplifting, and Occasionally Unbiased Account of the Duke-North Carolina Basketball Rivalry
An obsessively personal history of the blood feud between North Carolina’s and Duke’s basketball teams and what that rivalry says about class and culture in the South
The basketball rivalry between Duke and North Carolina is the fiercest and longest-running blood feud in college athletics, and perhaps in all of sports. To legions of otherwise reasonable adults, it is a conflict that surpasses athletics; it is rich against poor, locals against outsiders, even good against evil. In North Carolina, where both schools reside, it is a way of aligning oneself with larger philosophic ideals—of choosing teams in life—a tradition of partisanship that reveals the pleasures and even the necessities of hatred.
As the season unfolds, Blythe, the former longtime literary editor of Esquire and a lifelong Tarheels fan, will immerse himself in the lives of the two teams, eavesdropping on practice sessions, hanging with players, observing the arcane rituals of fans, and struggling to establish some basic human kinship with Duke’s players and proponents. With access to the coaches, the stars, and the bit players, it is both a chronicle of personal obsession and a record of social history.
The basketball rivalry between Duke and North Carolina is the fiercest and longest-running blood feud in college athletics, and perhaps in all of sports. To legions of otherwise reasonable adults, it is a conflict that surpasses athletics; it is rich against poor, locals against outsiders, even good against evil. In North Carolina, where both schools reside, it is a way of aligning oneself with larger philosophic ideals—of choosing teams in life—a tradition of partisanship that reveals the pleasures and even the necessities of hatred.
As the season unfolds, Blythe, the former longtime literary editor of Esquire and a lifelong Tarheels fan, will immerse himself in the lives of the two teams, eavesdropping on practice sessions, hanging with players, observing the arcane rituals of fans, and struggling to establish some basic human kinship with Duke’s players and proponents. With access to the coaches, the stars, and the bit players, it is both a chronicle of personal obsession and a record of social history.
382 pages, Kindle Edition
First published February 28, 2006
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 94 reviews
November 7, 2008
I was raised a Duke fan by my dad, who is an alumnus. He taught me the ABCs of college basketball (i.e., Anybody But Carolina). When he bought this book, we were both really looking forward to reading it. Then, we discovered that the author is a Carolina fan.
I was not confident that I could enjoy a book about the Duke-UNC rivalry if it was written from the Tarheel perspective. Surprisingly, I found myself really enjoying Blythe's journalistic writing style. Even more surprisingly, I discovered that the rivalry mysteriously creates a bond between Duke fans and UNC fans. I repeatedly found myself identifying with Blythe's account of the range of emotions that accompany the college basketball season on Tobacco Road. Blythe thoroughly explores the idea that despite the name-calling and other nastiness, Duke and Carolina fans thrive from having a worthy adversary. I agree: it's going to be so sweet this year when Duke's whips #1-ranked Carolina.
I was not confident that I could enjoy a book about the Duke-UNC rivalry if it was written from the Tarheel perspective. Surprisingly, I found myself really enjoying Blythe's journalistic writing style. Even more surprisingly, I discovered that the rivalry mysteriously creates a bond between Duke fans and UNC fans. I repeatedly found myself identifying with Blythe's account of the range of emotions that accompany the college basketball season on Tobacco Road. Blythe thoroughly explores the idea that despite the name-calling and other nastiness, Duke and Carolina fans thrive from having a worthy adversary. I agree: it's going to be so sweet this year when Duke's whips #1-ranked Carolina.
March 21, 2014
Blythe severely overestimates the world's tolerance for self-loathing middle-aged white guys. By about 300 pages.
July 15, 2011
A sporadically affecting account of Will Blythe's lifelong "struggle" with his animus toward Duke University and its legendary basketball team. The book is many things: an account of a father-son relationship, a history of a great sports rivalry, a paean to the lost Old South, an account of backup PG Melvin Scott's senior year at UNC, etc. As it turns out, it's way too many things, with great set pieces (Bylthe's biographical sketch of Mike Krzyzewski or his account of his father's death) scattered among uninteresting digressions, pointless interviews (a discussion with religious studies professor Robert Thurman about the karmic implications of hatred), and "too-hip-to-be-square" overwriting that calls to mind Chuck Klosterman at his absolute worst. However, as a UNC-CH alum, I can't bear to give this earnest effort less than three stars.
January 12, 2024
It took a little bit to get into but I really enjoyed this book. Reading it during basketball season I think really enhanced the reading experience. Honestly surprised with how well the author captured the feeling surrounding Chapel Hill and Carolina basketball.
September 29, 2023
Several thousands words eloquently describing how despite being human people with real and unique motivations, everyone from Duke is fundamentally evil and should probably be denied US citizenship on principal
March 30, 2020
Spoiler Alert: Carolina Wins :-)
April 1, 2008
This book really, and I do mean really gets the UNC-Duke rivalry right. I knew author had cred when he correctly knew Coach K's nickname - Satan.
I particularly loved his interview with "Towel Man." It's a great that we live in a country where a guy can get famous simply by only wearing a towel to Duke home games!
Even if you don't like basketball, North Carolina or whining angst-filled fortysomething men (the author), this book is well written and engaging for all types. I related to his reminiscing about his family rituals of watching Carolina games - I know I have my lucky earrings and sofa spot to this day!
Go Heels
Kat
UNC '86
I particularly loved his interview with "Towel Man." It's a great that we live in a country where a guy can get famous simply by only wearing a towel to Duke home games!
Even if you don't like basketball, North Carolina or whining angst-filled fortysomething men (the author), this book is well written and engaging for all types. I related to his reminiscing about his family rituals of watching Carolina games - I know I have my lucky earrings and sofa spot to this day!
Go Heels
Kat
UNC '86
January 24, 2011
I loved this book. As a Carolina grad a life-long Tar Heel fan, Blythe's words spoke to me. I found myself constantly thinking, "That's EXACTLY how I feel!" But, it's not just a book about a basketball rivalry, it's a story of a great state!
July 3, 2007
Kind of disappointing as a whole. Jenn's husband is quoted/mentioned in it though, so that was kind of exciting.
May 16, 2008
My primer on living in ACC country. Hilarious and fascinating.
Read
June 21, 2016In my non-fiction pantheon of all time favs...So, so, good.
March 10, 2019
This is my pick for the best book ever written on college basketball. Granted, Feinstein's book on Indiana's Season on the Brink may wrestle for that claim, but Will Blythe has captured the fanaticism that goes into rooting for a team and adds in thoughts on Southern culture, his father, rivalry, religious views on hate and obsession and thoughts of forgiveness and the passage of time.
Oh, and there's also some good basketball action as Blythe recounts some of North Carolina's 2005 season run to the National Championship.
Blythe is a huge Tarheels fan and he hates Duke with a passion. He confronts that hate, moving down from New York to his mother's home in North Carolina to cover the season. He hangs with the players, talks to fans, attends practices in Raleigh and befriends players. He also makes that 7 mile trip into enemy lines at Durham to deal with Duke (Dook). And, he even gets an interview with Duke Coach Mike K. and wonders if he'll feel the same presence one feels when Satan is around.
Blythe is an excellent writer, too, and the variances from the actual game stories are excellent. The last few graphs at the end, an homage to his father, is worth the price of the book alone. a
It doesn't matter if you're a Carolina or Duke fan. This book looks at the obsession of any team. Long ago, I hated the Boston Red Sox, more as tribute to my father, who grew up in New York in the 1950s and chose the Yankees over the Giants and Dodgers as his team. I ended up doing the same and after he passed away in 1987, I kept the faith and still rooted for the Yanks. That 2004 American League Championship Series where the Sox came back from a 3-0 deficit to win in seven games killed me.
A must read for any sports fan and for anyone who likes to read well-written stuff about self discovery, obsession, family history and being a fan.
Oh, and there's also some good basketball action as Blythe recounts some of North Carolina's 2005 season run to the National Championship.
Blythe is a huge Tarheels fan and he hates Duke with a passion. He confronts that hate, moving down from New York to his mother's home in North Carolina to cover the season. He hangs with the players, talks to fans, attends practices in Raleigh and befriends players. He also makes that 7 mile trip into enemy lines at Durham to deal with Duke (Dook). And, he even gets an interview with Duke Coach Mike K. and wonders if he'll feel the same presence one feels when Satan is around.
Blythe is an excellent writer, too, and the variances from the actual game stories are excellent. The last few graphs at the end, an homage to his father, is worth the price of the book alone. a
It doesn't matter if you're a Carolina or Duke fan. This book looks at the obsession of any team. Long ago, I hated the Boston Red Sox, more as tribute to my father, who grew up in New York in the 1950s and chose the Yankees over the Giants and Dodgers as his team. I ended up doing the same and after he passed away in 1987, I kept the faith and still rooted for the Yanks. That 2004 American League Championship Series where the Sox came back from a 3-0 deficit to win in seven games killed me.
A must read for any sports fan and for anyone who likes to read well-written stuff about self discovery, obsession, family history and being a fan.
September 24, 2018
Biggest rivalry in sports nation has everyone on their toes waiting every year for this game. This book has a lot of different opportunities for people to understand the rivalry against Duke & UNC. This game is definitely the biggest game in sports history. There are so many different ways coaches, players, and their staff do to get prepared for this big game. The Duke students camp outside for weeks during the winter just to get tickets to this game. Hint why they are called Cameron crazies. These two head coaches have known each other for a really long time and they are good friends. This makes it even better to watch. These coaches have the best team every single year, they get the best top players in the country and we all know why now. These coaches spend hours preparing for this game, watching film on the team, practicing 8 hours a day. Every year they play the tickets are sold out the second week they get on sale. For me I have been to two games of this rivalry and it’s crazy. The amount of noise and how hype each team is its crazy. This book teaches the readers about how really important games like these mean to the team and the viewers. One of these two teams could be really bad one year and the other be super good and the game would still be super close, because of the competitive and environment the players are in. They play twice a year one at Duke and the other game at UNC and defiantly Cameron indoor is the loudest of them all. This game can get you off your couch and be yelling at the Tv even if you’re not a basketball liker.
March 3, 2020
I grew up in Chapel Hill, knew both of the author's brothers, earned two degrees from UNC, and am quoted on page 213, so you may reasonably suspect I'm a little biased, but this is a wonderful book for those wondering how a basketball rivalry can affect a community in unexpected ways. The fact that it's also a wonderfully descriptive account of my hometown and the era of my youth is just a bonus. Will it appeal to those who aren't fascinated by obsession, or those who lack tolerance for those who suffer from obsession? I don't know. But if you enjoyed Word Freak: Heartbreak, Triumph, Genius, and Obsession in the World of Competitive Scrabble Players or Salvation on Sand Mountain: Snake-Handling and Redemption in Southern Appalachia, you might be the kind of person who would love a guided tour of Tobacco Road in winter.
April 12, 2020
Not that great of a book overall. It tries to be an in depth, witty book about one of the most stories rivalries in sports. However, he spent four chapters going in depth on one player from UNC. He went on tangents and didn't really explain the rivalry at all. His writing was Hunter S. Thompson-esque, which I appreciated. But about 100 pages in I started questioning why I was reading it. It tried to do too much. I did like, however, the interview he did with the duke coach, and the sojourn he did to Duke, to do investigating to see how he ACTUALLY felt about them. I liked that chapter. If the book was more about interviews with coaches, students, getting inside their minds directly, it would have been a much more enjoyable read.
March 18, 2023
I was hoping for ammunition in my decades-long dislike of the Blue Devils, but instead got an unhinged journalist rambling about his dad and other personal relationships for 400 pages in between occasional recaps of basketball games. The interviews with various figures (coaches, players, fans) from the Duke-UNC rivalry were occasionally illuminating, but seemed more a function of the author using every bit of material he’d acquired (which seems the only possible reason for the dozens of pages detailing his hang-outs with Tar Heel benchwarmer Melvin Scott) than a planned narrative strategy. The lack of focus or thesis probably contributed to my ultimately taking 6 weeks to finish this relatively thin story.
May 20, 2025
1.5 stars.
If you’ve ever been to a family function and had a drunk uncle start reminiscing about events you don’t care about or people you don’t know, you’ve essentially read this book. This is just a fans rambling memoir with some average writing thrown in. There’s an apology to the reader where he says if you write a book about everything you’ve written about nothing. I wish I had read that first…but I suppose this is why he put it at the end of the book.
When he actually writes about the 2005 UNC season, it’s fairly good and intriguing sports writing. That’s the only reason this isn’t 1 star, but he only does that about 15% of the book.
If you’ve ever been to a family function and had a drunk uncle start reminiscing about events you don’t care about or people you don’t know, you’ve essentially read this book. This is just a fans rambling memoir with some average writing thrown in. There’s an apology to the reader where he says if you write a book about everything you’ve written about nothing. I wish I had read that first…but I suppose this is why he put it at the end of the book.
When he actually writes about the 2005 UNC season, it’s fairly good and intriguing sports writing. That’s the only reason this isn’t 1 star, but he only does that about 15% of the book.
May 22, 2020
I was very into this book when I started it, but it wore on me as it proceeded. I'm a big time Carolina fan and college hoop fanatic, as well as a resident of Chapel Hill. It was cool to capture a lot of the lore and intensity of the greatest rivalry in sports, but there was just too much of Blythe's life and his random observations of things. What you get is kind of a bloated book that in no way matches the quality of legendary sports writers like Halberstam or Feinstein.
March 8, 2021
A nice exploration on what it means to be a fan. Blythe (the journalist) seems to understand that it is all silliness, but the beast within him makes basketball seem important. He meets Duke fans and even Coach K in an attempt to figure out why he hates them so much. Apparently, it is in his family. I used to feel that way about the Packers, but at some point I found it didn't matter to me anymore. All teams (and fans in particular0 are basically the same. This book has a great title.
October 21, 2019
DNF at about 20%. I wanted to learn more about the nature of a college rivalry, despite not following the teams myself. The rivalry is not examined though. Only serves as one impetus of about five for the author to do a Sedaris impression.
March 11, 2024
I hated it. Of course I am Dukie. I still have nightmares of 8 points down 16 seconds to go.
So many good things you could have covered.
Two very good schools and basketball programs that make each other better.
GTHC
So many good things you could have covered.
Two very good schools and basketball programs that make each other better.
GTHC
June 10, 2024
As a fan of social psychology I enjoyed Will Blythe's approach to fandom and identity. The most open-minded, even-tempered, charitable Duke fan probably couldn't get through the first chapter, but as a Carolina fan that doesn't bother me.
March 2, 2018
I really enjoyed the book. I think it touched the rivalry in a good way and I enjoyed the anecdotes immensely.
July 24, 2018
A must read for all Tarheel fans!
October 11, 2019
An immersive, hilarious, wholly gratifying experience,
May 4, 2021
Length could've been cut in half
July 27, 2021
Basketball is life. Life is basketball.
August 22, 2022
A wonderful accounting of the Duke and UNC men's basketball programs rivalry through time.
July 4, 2025
One of the best books I have read on the UNC/Duke rivalry.
March 20, 2013
As a big Carolina fan I thought that this book would be a great read. However some aspects of the book were kind of annoying. Blythe goes over the 2005 UNC Basketball season and describes the feuds between the Tar Heel nation and the Dookies. At first I thought that this type of book would be great for showing our hatred towards Dook, but the front cover really didn't express the actuality of how this literature came across. I thought that this was great for people that are a part of this Carolina culture but for regular college basketball fans this book might have seemed confusing/hard to read. Blythe tried to make this book humorous, and some parts were, but he went off into too many tangents. It would have been a great shorter book without all of the nonsensical stories that don't connect that well to the book. I think that this is a good long read if you are a bleed Carolina Blue but others may not like it at all.
Displaying 1 - 30 of 94 reviews