Notes of Interest:
I have been a student of meditation for about 3 years now. I meditate at least once a day, sometimes two or more, and have experienced its benefits first-hand. So when I come across books on mindfulness or meditation, I snatch them up. This is one I downloaded through Amazon Prime’s first reads. For someone who has been meditating for a while, it’s a basic refresher course on mindfulness and meditation, but it also had a few new things which I found helpful and intriguing. (More on that in a minute.) For the person who has never meditated before, or is new to the practice, this is an excellent resource, complete with audio file downloads to help you through the guided meditation exercises.
What could have made it better for me:
I have no complaints or issues with this book: none, nada, rien, nani mo. It was well-organized, covered essential ground, had lots of thoughtful content, and an actual plan for implementing the practice. So, let’s jump to the juicy stuff, shall we?
What I liked about it:
The book starts by stressing that meditation and mindfulness are practices. That’s extremely important to understand. Mindfulness is not a magic pill that will solve problems. It’s not something you do a few times, learn the skills, and you’re done. It’s a lifelong journey that must be practiced regularly to demonstrate improvement, like learning a language fluently, excelling in sports, mastering musical instruments, etc.
These practices are based on cognitive behavior training techniques and are scientifically proven to “exert a powerful influence on one’s health, well-being, and happiness ….” It’s about training your mind. Therefore, one thing I appreciated about this book is it outlines an actual plan for practice. At the end of each chapter, there are suggested meditations to download from the publisher website, principles to review, and activities called “Habit Breakers”. I wasn’t able to follow the plan exactly in the eight-week time frame they set up, but I did read or incorporate their activity suggestions on a daily-to-weekly basis based on the time I had for it.
The authors begin by addressing what meditation and mindfulness are … and what they are not. So, the first chapter delves into the overview of what to expect from the plan and discusses the scientific evidence backing the effects this practice can have on things like severe depression, anxiety, memory, creativity, and more. The next few chapters encourage the reader to think deeply and honestly about their present state of mind and introduces basic principles of mindfulness meditation, one principle at a time.
For example, the second chapter is called, “Why Do We Attack Ourselves?” and discusses the role negative thoughts play in allowing our thinking to rule our moods, habits, and reactions. The chapter then discusses how human brain thought processes work and stresses that when we are aware that we are not our emotions, that emotions are impermanent things, we can detach from a bad mood or self-criticism before it leads us by the nose into a tailspin. We can choose to let go, knowing that dwelling on problems doesn’t solve them. To solve problems, we have to be proactive — a different frame of mine. The purpose of practice is training the mind to transform destructive thoughts or reactions into proactive action … to separate the thinking mind from the doing mind and give each the proper space to do their thing, rather than attempting to solve problems by worrying. Transforming your psychological habits can transform your life. Mindfulness practice builds resilience, and resilience is where the magic happens when it comes to being able to handle life’s pitfalls.
Besides focusing on coping with depression, other topics covered include breathing spaces for anxiety; body scans for turning toward adversity and non-reactivity; pressures of guilt, shame, and fear; and acceptance of self-forgiveness and compassion. The Habit Breakers are simple activities. I altered a couple to suit my circumstances better, but the idea is to pay attention to how much we humans do on auto-pilot on a regular basis without knowing it, and then intentionally do something different. Intent matters. Awareness matters. Especially when trying to break bad habits and form good ones.
Some quotes from the book …
* “Happiness is looking at the same things with different eyes. Life only happens here — at this very moment. Tomorrow and yesterday are no more than a thought.”
* “John was on his way to school. He was worried about the math lesson. He was not sure he could control the class again today. It was not part of a janitor’s duty.
What did you notice when you read these sentences? Most people find that they repeatedly update their view of the scene in their mind’s eye. First of all, they see a little boy winding his way to school and worrying about his math lesson. Then they’re forced to update the scene as the little boy changes into a teacher, before finally morphing into a janitor. This example illustrates how the mind is continuously working “behind the scenes” to build a picture of the world as best it can. We never see a scene in photographic detail, but instead make inferences based on the “facts” that we are given. The mind elaborates on the details, judging them, fitting them with past experience, anticipating how they’ll be in the future and attaching meaning to them. It’s a fantastically elaborate mental juggling act. And this whole process is run and rerun every time we read a magazine, recall a memory, engage in conversation or anticipate the future. As a result, events seen in the mind’s eye can end up differing wildly from person to person and from any objective “reality”: we don’t see the world as it is, but as we are. We are constantly making guesses about the world—and we’re barely conscious of it. We only notice it when someone comes along and plays a trick on us, as in the John scenario.” [Blog note: This is part of a discussion on how the mind forms thoughts as “facts” based on assumptions and guesses. When we become aware that the things we tell ourselves are not facts (I’m a failure, I can’t do this, I just want out, etc.), we gain different choices. We can let those thoughts go because we recognize they are half-truths or false. I felt this was an excellent example of how the mind automatically, though incorrectly, forms assumptions.]
* “The experienced meditator is not someone whose mind does not wander, but one who gets very used to beginning again.”
* “Breathing Spaces , of themselves , do not solve anything in the short term. But they may give you the perspective to act more skillfully.”
* “[Acceptance] allows us to become fully aware of difficulties, with all of their painful nuances, and to respond to them in the most skillful way possible. It gives us more time and space to respond. And often, we may discover, the wisest way of responding is to do nothing at all.”
* “Well, here it is : now is the future that you promised yourself last year, last month, last week. Now is the only moment you’ll ever really have. Mindfulness is about waking up to this. It’s about becoming fully aware of the life you’ve already got, rather than the life you wish you had.”
* “Indeed , one of the words that we translate into English as “meditation” actually means “cultivation” in the original Pali language . It originally referred to cultivation of crops in the fields and flowers in the garden . So how long should the cultivation of the mindfulness garden take each day ? It is best to go into the garden and see for yourself .”
* “Practice as if your life depended on it, as in many ways, it surely does. For then you will be able to live the life you have — and live it as if it truly mattered.”
Recommendation:
It’s hard for me to separate discussion about a mindfulness book from the topic of mindfulness itself, but I think this is an excellent read for covering the topics necessary to begin learning the practice of mindfulness meditation. If anyone is suffering from depression, anxiety, or just feels like life is so frantic you don’t have time to breathe, I encourage you to give the plan in this book a try. These are good basic life skills for learning resilience and healthy coping strategies for everyone from all walks of life, in my opinion. For more experienced meditators, much of it will sound familiar, but the eight-week plan might offer a few new challenges to try. It’s a good fundamentals reference tool.