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Your Unique Self: The Radical Path to Personal Enlightenment
Your Unique Self changes the game both in terms of our understanding of what enlightenment means and why it matters and even more importantly, in terms of our understanding of the self and its relationship to the larger contexts of life and relationship. The evolutionary emergence of Unique Self is both a new chapter in Integral theory as well as a powerful evolution of the very idea and experience of enlightenment. Unique Self enlightenment is the emergence of the personal beyond the impersonal, self beyond ego. It is the manifestation of personal individuation beyond ego. The implications of this revolutionary and evolutionary teaching for enlightenment, evolutionary spirituality, shadow work, love, sexuality, parenting, education, politics, relationship, evolutionary we-space and much more are brilliantly and beautifully evoked in this ground breaking volume.
554 pages, Kindle Edition
First published January 1, 2012
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Displaying 1 - 8 of 8 reviews
June 20, 2020
This is a difficult book to rate; many of the ideas are beautiful, inspiring, deeply insightful. I cried a few times at some of the personal stories Marc shares. There is a deep and grounded spirituality, and unique takes on old concepts, like shadow = unlived life. So why 2 stars?
1) The basic premise of unique self is set up to be a new evolution in consciousness, (“for the first time in history”, etc) I think this requires straw-manning all other spiritual traditions and teachings. I think Unique Self is a nonduality Teaching with the emphasis on the personal expression rather than the universal; the wave rather than the ocean. This isn’t a problem except that Gafni keeps saying this is a unique spiritual take that basically no else has, essentially relegating all nondaul teachings to True Self teachings, which I think is a big mistake.
2) he talks abt Unique Self as this unique teaching while at the same time harkening back to ancient traditions and reinterpreting them in his framework, as unique expressions of unique self. (“Know yourself is the Unique Self Maxim of the Delphic Oracle” p 121) This contradiction runs throughout the book continuously in a way that I found deeply frustrating.
3) He’s constantly name-dropping in a way that I find undermines the credibility of what he’s saying.
4) I think it overemphasizes uniqueness in an unnecessary dialectic that make
5) I think the overemphasis on uniqueness has a huge potential for supporting narcissism and a form of tantric spiritual bypassing
6) there are a variety of claims I simply disagree with or find i have to jump through big hoops to make sense in ways that wouldn’t be misleading
As a result I would dissuade others to read this book unless they already have a deep spiritual grounding, insight and study, already have an integral view so they won’t be enamored by the relative truths and take the bathwater w the baby, and a deep psychological self understanding and are used to disagreeing w certain points authors make with agreeing with others. Maybe that’s everyone
1) The basic premise of unique self is set up to be a new evolution in consciousness, (“for the first time in history”, etc) I think this requires straw-manning all other spiritual traditions and teachings. I think Unique Self is a nonduality Teaching with the emphasis on the personal expression rather than the universal; the wave rather than the ocean. This isn’t a problem except that Gafni keeps saying this is a unique spiritual take that basically no else has, essentially relegating all nondaul teachings to True Self teachings, which I think is a big mistake.
2) he talks abt Unique Self as this unique teaching while at the same time harkening back to ancient traditions and reinterpreting them in his framework, as unique expressions of unique self. (“Know yourself is the Unique Self Maxim of the Delphic Oracle” p 121) This contradiction runs throughout the book continuously in a way that I found deeply frustrating.
3) He’s constantly name-dropping in a way that I find undermines the credibility of what he’s saying.
4) I think it overemphasizes uniqueness in an unnecessary dialectic that make
5) I think the overemphasis on uniqueness has a huge potential for supporting narcissism and a form of tantric spiritual bypassing
6) there are a variety of claims I simply disagree with or find i have to jump through big hoops to make sense in ways that wouldn’t be misleading
As a result I would dissuade others to read this book unless they already have a deep spiritual grounding, insight and study, already have an integral view so they won’t be enamored by the relative truths and take the bathwater w the baby, and a deep psychological self understanding and are used to disagreeing w certain points authors make with agreeing with others. Maybe that’s everyone
July 25, 2015
The comparison between western and eastern approaches of spirituality and the notion of Unique Self to reconcile both is powerful. I also appreciate the 8 stations on the roads to the Unique Self, especially the one dealing with your unique shadow (and the 10 principles to work on it)
And this quote about friends:
There are 3 kinds of friends in the world. An ordinary friend sees you as you appear to be. An extra-ordinary friend sees you for what you can be. But in presence of the highest friend, you already are.
And that yes in hebrew means integrity (and so much more)
And this quote about friends:
There are 3 kinds of friends in the world. An ordinary friend sees you as you appear to be. An extra-ordinary friend sees you for what you can be. But in presence of the highest friend, you already are.
And that yes in hebrew means integrity (and so much more)
February 2, 2026
Like his friend Wilber, he needs to learn how to write a shorter book. Content was great, but the book could have been a quarter shorter. If he had a good editor, he would have ditched a chapter or two.
August 10, 2013
Beautiful Transmission of the Unique Self Dharma & Experience
If you are in search of an Enlightenment that leads directly to your day-to-day life, you have found a treasure. Beyond the identifications of the ego and beyond the classical enlightenment experience of emptiness there is a space where the absolute dignity of the Personal is resurrected: a space of personal love that melts the ego-contractions, and of the realization that the One True Self is always already Unique and has a perspective, our perspective. Through this we are becoming active participants in this world that needs our gifts so desperately, as well as co-creators in this evolution of love and consciousness, which is something that only our egos refuse to believe.
The book is psychoactive in the best sense of the word. In its subtle linguistic beauty it breathes the experience of the Unique Self that is transmitted to the reader. In Marc's own words: "This book speaks dangerous words. Dangerous to your sense that you are small; to your feeling that you are alone and invisible; to your belief that you are worthless, inadequate, or bad; to your belief that you are too much or not enough. I invite you to listen dangerously."
Besides a comprehensive theoretical localization of the integral concepts between Eastern and Western Enlightenment teachings, between Kabbalah and integral and evolutionary spirituality, between the Personal and the Impersonal, which especially in the expansive footnotes doesn't lack in academic rigor, you find applications like 25 practical and easy to recognize discernments between ego and Unique Self as well as the implications that the Unique Self experience and teaching has for such diverse areas of life like love, sexuality, shadow, education as well as malice and death.
If you are in search of an Enlightenment that leads directly to your day-to-day life, you have found a treasure. Beyond the identifications of the ego and beyond the classical enlightenment experience of emptiness there is a space where the absolute dignity of the Personal is resurrected: a space of personal love that melts the ego-contractions, and of the realization that the One True Self is always already Unique and has a perspective, our perspective. Through this we are becoming active participants in this world that needs our gifts so desperately, as well as co-creators in this evolution of love and consciousness, which is something that only our egos refuse to believe.
The book is psychoactive in the best sense of the word. In its subtle linguistic beauty it breathes the experience of the Unique Self that is transmitted to the reader. In Marc's own words: "This book speaks dangerous words. Dangerous to your sense that you are small; to your feeling that you are alone and invisible; to your belief that you are worthless, inadequate, or bad; to your belief that you are too much or not enough. I invite you to listen dangerously."
Besides a comprehensive theoretical localization of the integral concepts between Eastern and Western Enlightenment teachings, between Kabbalah and integral and evolutionary spirituality, between the Personal and the Impersonal, which especially in the expansive footnotes doesn't lack in academic rigor, you find applications like 25 practical and easy to recognize discernments between ego and Unique Self as well as the implications that the Unique Self experience and teaching has for such diverse areas of life like love, sexuality, shadow, education as well as malice and death.
October 13, 2013
As I reflected on the Lectionary text today this book stands out. The text is about the ten lepers and only one came back to thank Jesus for the healing. He is his unique self. This book is about developing our unique selves. Rather then seeking glory, money, power, prestige one should appreciate and love him or herself for their uniqueness. My sense is the author would like to see a creation of a world religion removing the prejudices and the biases in the various religions. For me, a part my unique self is being a follower of Jesus, letting go of the institutional prejudices but practicing the basic theme of the Judaeo-Christian tradition, "To love the Lord your God with all of your heart, soul, and mind, and your neighbor as yourself. One quote stood out for me:
"Peace will come into the world when each person can hear themselves for who they are, without needing to drown out all the other voices." Marc Gafni
When we accept each other in our own uniqueness--there will be peace. Deo Gratias! Thanks be to God!
"Peace will come into the world when each person can hear themselves for who they are, without needing to drown out all the other voices." Marc Gafni
When we accept each other in our own uniqueness--there will be peace. Deo Gratias! Thanks be to God!
July 8, 2013
Your Unique Self is a masterpiece in the Integral Spirituality genre. Not a fast read, for me at least, but engaging and provocative. This is one I will keep close for frequent reference and regular inspiration.
September 1, 2012
A beautiful and insightful guide to self-realization.
March 26, 2018
Interesting, and hard. Truly hard to build.
Displaying 1 - 8 of 8 reviews






