This book will without a doubt be in my top ten list for the year.
“No matter what is wrong with Bunny, whatever you want to call it, one thing is certain—to be sick in the head is not at all the same as being normal sick. If you are normal sick, people will at least pretend to care.”
Darkly comedic while offering a wry and keen perspective on the strange necessity of human interaction and relationships, Kirshenbaum explores depression and mental anxiety—those invisible disorders of the mind.
I related to main character Bunny in so many ways. She just wants to be left alone to read. She says what she thinks and feels in situations—almost especially when it is the wrong thing to say. When she feels like throwing something across the room, she does it. And all the time, there’s something ticking in her mind, something that says—why me? Why am I different, why do I act this way? Why do I feel this way? Why can’t I stop it?
I think we all feel alone in the crowd, at least sometimes.
The first half of the story follows her descent from her point of view, the debilitating feeling of being stuck in your own head and not being able to get out. When no one quite understands what is wrong or how to help you, when it has been a lifetime of struggling just to get to a place of semi-normality. I loved how the narrative—mostly set on December 31, 2008, as Bunny prepares to go out to dinner and a New Year’s Eve party with her friends—is constantly in flux as she remembers pieces of her past, as little moments and objects fit together into a wider narrative of childhood, loss, friendship, and the buildup of her depression.
The second half of the story is what happens next, when it all becomes too much, and in Bell Jar, Girl, Interrupted, and Cuckoo’s Nest fashion, an abrupt new way of life begins, for better or for worse—for real or imagined.
Brilliant, thought-provoking, emotionally stirring, truly relatable, and a true reminder of the power of fiction.
My thanks to Soho for my copy of this one to read and review.