Dutch Uncle

by Peter Pavia

Three days out of prison and trying to stay on the right side of the law, Harry Healy doesn’t really want to get involved with Manfred Pfiser’s drug deals. But he needs the money – so he agrees to make one simple delivery.Simple, that is, till Harry stumbles across a dead body, the result of a robbery cooked up by an old cellmate of his together with a former high school baseball star, a trigger-happy sociopath, and a beach bunny who can’t seem to keep her clothing on.  Now they’re all on the run – from the Miami police, from the drug kingpins they ripped off, and from each other…

Genres: Crime, Mystery, Fiction, Noir, Thriller, Pulp

255 pages, Kindle Edition

First published July 1, 2005

Reviews

[Kemper · Rating 3 out of 5]

“The only reason to visit Florida is to identify your daughter’s dead body. That is it…The state flag of Florida should be a coroner holding up a sheet and then two parents screaming. Then there’s a flamingo in the bottom right hand corner with sunglasses going ‘YEAH’. And in Latin it says ‘Why did she go into porn?!?’”

- Patton Oswalt
Tragedy Plus Comedy Equals Time

Florida has provided an entire sub-genre of mysteries with crime writers like John D. MacDonald, Elmore Leonard, Carl Hiaasen and Tim Dorsey often portraying the state as teeming with colorful psychotic lowlifes perpetrating crimes. You can add Dutch Uncle to that list of books that won’t do much to boost tourism to Miami.

Harry Healy is a petty criminal just out of jail and down to his last few bucks when he bumps into Leo, a guy he shared a cell with for a weekend. Leo tells Harry that he can make some money by doing a drug delivery for Manfred Pfiser who is generally known as the Dutch Uncle because….Well, he’s Dutch. Duh!

This was generally well-written, but it definitely feels like a poor man’s Elmore Leonard. It’s entertaining but doesn’t do anything to make it stand out from the many other Florida crime books out there.

[Dan · Rating 3 out of 5]

Three days out of jail, Harry Healy gets talked into making a cocaine delivery. The delivery goes south and when Harry goes back to the guy he was working for, he finds him dead, a bullet wound to the head. Worse yet, Harry's a suspect. Can Harry escape from the law or will he wind up just like his Dutch Uncle?

I'm not really sure what to think about this one. On one hand, I enjoyed the three separate threads; the cops investigating Manfred's murder, Harry trying to forget about the law nipping at his heels, and the killers enjoying their ill-gotten gains. There were some good twists. On the other hand, the threads didn't converge that well and at least fifteen pages felt like filler. Also, the subplot about Harry and the waitress felt tacked on.

While it was an exciting read at times, Dutch Uncle is strictly middle of the road as far as Hard Case Crime is concerned.

[Robert · Rating 2 out of 5]

So I’m sorry to say DUTCH UNCLE really wasn’t all that memorable (the way a Camry isn’t really all that memorable after you’ve been staring at Lamborghinis all day and getting more than an eyeful). Like the Camry in a lot filled with Lamborghinis, this book seemed to have potential, a voice, and displayed brief inklings of success. But I was lost in a sea of characters who didn’t really feel all that different from one another and backstory that proved jarring at times. Instead of whispering back and forth between the present and the past, I felt like I was in a boat and about to be tipped over.

Like any good hard-boiled tale, the men packed more than a few punches, and the violence bubbled up to the surface. As for the women, they actually seemed to have a bit of sass and strength, and it proved to be a rather pleasant surprise. And it made my ensuing disappointment all the worse, as I found myself forgetting passages and entire chapters as soon as I had finished them. Had I not enjoyed all the other Hard Case Crime novels, I might have given up on this one sooner, and just cut my losses, even as I kept waiting for potential to mirror up with reality. In the end, it just didn’t quite seem to pan out.

[Alonzo Church · Rating 3 out of 5]

Harry Healy, one of those nice guys in trouble with the law for being too quick with his fists, has just got out on parole down in Miami. His Dutch Uncle sets him up on a job that promises him the easy money he needs to get him back to New York and maybe an honest life. But there’s no easy money in noir — not without a price to pay. When the dead bodies start piling up, will our hero be able to escape? Or will all the cocaine blowing around mess up his judgment?

This is one that starts promisingly, but loses its focus as it goes along and adds characters. The initial story — the guy on parole tempted back into crime — is a golden oldie, but well presented here. The stories of various low lifes on the downslide to oblivion is not that interesting. I would give this to a friend and expect they won’t be mad at me for wasting their time. Ultimately, though, this is just ok.

[Roger · Rating 4 out of 5]

If there was an award for political incorrectness Dutch Uncle might be in the running. Peter Pavia’s novel about 90’s Miami Beach is like The Birdcage with less laughs and more cocaine. I enjoyed it for what it was: a crime novel with a touch of sleaze and a twist of hope at the end. Bottoms up.

[Joseph · Rating 5 out of 5]

GENIUS! Great read, engaging characters, and entertaining story. 4 thumbs up!

[Matt Phillips · Rating 4 out of 5]

Stellar street level crime novel. Sad to know this kind of work isn't published much anymore.

[Dave · Rating 5 out of 5]

Florida is a frequent locale for crime stories, but the fact that Pavia uses Florida as his locale doesn't mean he's a copycat. This tale stands on its own merit. It takes the reader to a more recent world of Miami Beach, a world of endless beaches and wannabe models looking for an agent to set them up, a world of parolees who can't land a real job, a world of cocaine dealers and addicts, a world of ripoffs and backstabbers, and Barroom brawls, and the pounding beat coming from dozens of nightclubs.
This book, Dutch Uncle, is the real deal. Harry came down to Florida with a seemingly rich girlfriend who he never hears from again after a bar brawl lands him six months in County. Upon getting out, he thinks about playing it straight but he needs the cash a few quick deliveries for the Dutch Uncle, Manfred, can pay off. Harry didn't bargain on getting caught up in murder. Leo set him up with this deal but Leo has his hands full with Vicki who doesn't like to wear clothes and never leaves the house and two good old boys he sends to do his dirty work. As the body count grows, the police start focusing on Harry and Leo. Detective Martinson is a character in his own right and Lili Acevedo is like Angie Dickinson returning as Jennifer Lopez in tight beige suits. Pavia gets the cool beat of Miami Beach just right. Terrific reading and truly a worthwhile addition to the Hard Case Crime series.

[Craig Childs · Rating 4 out of 5]

I dug deep into the Hard Case Crime backlog for some seaside reading in Malta this weekend.

I don’t know if the title is an intentional homage to Elmore “Dutch” Leonard, but I suspect it must be because this novel seems to have been crafted in his image. Pavia captures the essence of Leonard’s streetwise dialogue, a blend of slang and bluff from the mouths of characters who are never as smart as they think they are.

This book also provides that same feeling to the readers that we have been dropped into the middle of an ongoing story that began years before the first chapter and will probably not end in the likely places.

Harry is three days out of jail when he decides to score some quick cash by doing a cocaine delivery. The deal goes south, then he discovers the middle man who gave him the drugs has been murdered. He goes on the lam figuring the cops are sure to finger him as the shooter...

Leo has two deadbeat associates living in his house who are the actual killers. They were only supposed to rob the middle man but one of them got an itchy trigger finger. Now Leo has the cartel mad at him and may have to take drastic measures to save his life...

Arnie Martinson is the tired, cynical homicide detective who caught this crap case. Between the department-mandated sensitivity training and his super-ambitious boss, Arnie just wants to find the perp quick...

The narrative is less akin to a structured three-act arc as much as a cinéma vérité documentary following day-to-day lives of smarmy, desperate, cocaine-fueled criminals.

I enjoyed the sarcastic humor:

“Leo felt sorry for Alex. He felt sorry for Alex’s mom, for his sister, and for the uncle. On the other hand, the hand that counted, he didn’t have to worry any more about Alex blabbing to the cops.”

“The sidewalks were clogged with noisy Italians, Germans with seven-figure Swiss bank accounts, and blonde bunnies who seemed like they’d been raised in Midwestern towns but were too frail to be farm girls. Hip-hugging corduroys showcase their narrow figures, exhibiting brown bellies and pierced navels. Every fifty feet or so, one would uncork a mind-bending whinny, and throw her arms around another girl who looked just like her and happened to be approaching from the opposite direction:

However, Pavia cannot match Leonard’s ability to keep a plot moving at a consistent pace. At one point, although I was caught up in the story and the characters, I realized nothing of substance had actually happened for at least 80 pages.

Despite this single flaw, this was a more-than-solid debut novel. The ending had a nice balance of action, a twist or two I did not see coming, and one genuine moment of real character growth that gave the book emotional resonance (something Leonard did not always achieve). I would definitely read another from Peter Pavia.

[Ruz El · Rating 4 out of 5]

3.5/5

I'm reading these HCC books mostly in spine number order, and this one turned out to be a bit of an odd duck. A guy is murdered, and the book proceeds to tell the story of the investigators, the guy who was behind it, and a guy being possibly framed, with no real proper antagonist. It's never even really a mystery. It is a fun read though, seeing all the players going about their separate paths. That said, it's based in the '90s and there's a real homophobic bent to some of the language. I'm putting that on capturing the era as opposed to a political position, but some may be weary of it.

So yeah, a nice take on a familiar premise that managed to be rewarding.

[John Stanley · Rating 4 out of 5]

There's a comparison made on the back cover of the book comparing Peter Pavia to Elmore Leonard and I agree in the sense that so many of Leonard's books, while entertaining and really well written, end up going no place in particular. "Dutch Uncle" was kind of a collection of stories, each about a different character or set of characters, all related to a central storyline, but ending up not going anywhere special. While I enjoyed the book, I could just have easily done without it.

[Chris · Rating 4 out of 5]

A fun crime novel with some surprising twists from what you expect (not with any sort of mystery, because the reader already knows about that side of it from the start, but with the results) and some decent characterization. The ending tricked me into being really angry for a minute before revealing a little fake-out maneuver, so I'll give it a little exra credit for originality.

[Jack R.]

A hard miss from Hard Case Crime: a multi-perspective hardboiled comedy involving dummy cons, a wiseacre everyman hero, and noble but bumbling cops (all Floridian, of course). Author Pavia longs to recreate Hiaasen--with a dash of Leonard--but all he really cooks up is an R-Rated Dave Berry potboiler.

[jjmann3 · Rating 2 out of 5]

Fresh out of jail, main character Harry gets set up to take the fall for a murder in this seedy Florida crime tale. The dialogue is a little plodding but the story delivers overall with cocaine, guns, and girls a'plenty.

[Du · Rating 4 out of 5]

Really enjoyable just jumps and goes from the get-go. There's a level of sleazy Florida to it, with a level of caper intelligence that really works. The characters seem real and they seem authentic with a hint of fringe thrown in.

[Art the Turtle of Amazing Girth · Rating 3 out of 5]

2.98

One of the worst of these HCC I've read.

Not gonna go into public detail, just not for me

[Donald · Rating 1 out of 5]

The “Dutch Uncle” in this book is Harry’s uncle Manfred, a hard-partying coke fiend!

[Quinton · Rating 3 out of 5]

Good story, subpar writing.

[Peter Rowe · Rating 2 out of 5]

There's a few Hard Case Crime books that are out of print. If you're lucky you can pick 'em for a few pence from Amazon dealers. Got this one for 1p plus postage. It's a pretty beat up ex-library copy from Highland Park, Illinois.

Anyhow, there's probably a reason some of these books have gone out of print, maybe licensing issues, or perhaps they're just not the best. This was readable but not so good. It seemed there were just too many characters for its 250 pages and the central murder feels like a non-event. I was finding myself having to backtrack to work out who was who.

Could have been a decent slice-of-life but was unfocused and cluttered.

[Michael W. · Rating 3 out of 5]

I picked this up after attending a reading by the writer, Peter Pavia, who was very entertaining, at [http://www.freebirdbooks.com] in Brooklyn.

This book is published by a fairly small and independant publisher, [http://www.hardcasecrime.com], that is re-publishing classic novels of the 'pulp fiction' genre, and publishing new works by writers of what I would describe as 'neo-pulp fiction'.

I love the writing style and language of this novel. Pavia does an incredible job of updating the pulp style to the modern day while delivering a great driving plot centered around Harry Healy, a small-time hood and part-time thug, who's finally admitting that he really does have a heart of gold and decides to turn his life around. But is too late?!?! You have to read it to find out...

[Nathan · Rating 3 out of 5]

A crime is committed and the story follows three paths from it: the cops, the crooks and the man thought to have done it. As you expect, there is overlap between the threads but they don't really come together in a tidy way. Clearly the intention, but it felt a little bit lacking. Writing style is fine and workmanlike without being flashy. Not as exciting as the cover blurb would suggest. Rated MA for violence, coarse language, nudity and drug use. 3/5

[James Powell · Rating 2 out of 5]

I enjoyed the overall story in DUTCH UNCLE, but unfortunately, the changing POVs in each chapter was a real turn off. Sure, switching POVs helped move the story along, but it created a disconnect for me because there was no real main character to pull for. That alone wouldn't have been a major problem, but Pavia adds lots of (unimportant) details about the past of each character, thus adding unnecessary asides that halted the flow of an otherwise interesting tale.

[Michael Moreci · Rating 2 out of 5]

I'm a fan of the Hard Case Crime series, a fan of noir/crime fiction in general. But this didn't have much going for it--it lacked a strong central character, and could have been much, much shorter. Pavia wants to be Elmore Leonard--an admirable ambition--but doesn't get the unique characterizations down the way Leonard does.

[Wesley Allan · Rating 3 out of 5]

Mediocre entry in the Hard Case Crime series. Small-time crook Harry Healy gets framed for a murder. The book focuses on various characters - including the crooks and the police trying to solve the case. Ends up too scattered and nothing special for the crime noir genre.

[Mikel · Rating 1 out of 5]

in the world of noir, this fails to really register.

[Pam]

03/10/08 rec via bookmooch

[Peter Martin · Rating 2 out of 5]

Captures the seamy, squalid side of South Beach, but more of an exhausted trudge than a sprint. That may be more true to the spirit intended, yet makes reading it more of a chore than a pleasure.

[Claudette Gabbs · Rating 3 out of 5]

This story jumped around a lot. There were times it lost my interest b/c of this. It's a so-so story.

[Larry Webber · Rating 4 out of 5]

want to read this again sometime

[Manosthehandsoffate · Rating 2 out of 5]

Decent writing but kind of a downer of a book. The plot meandered quite a bit.