The Door That Shouldn't Have Been There: A Modern Fairy Tale About Grief

by Corinna Edwards-Colledge

Once upon a time, a husband watches as his wife opens a Door. He tries to follow her, waking instead to find his beloved dead beside him. Days later, The Door appears again. He doesn't know where it will take him. All he knows is that he's desperate to see his wife again. This is a story about a husband's sorrow, and where it takes him. This is a story about grief. This is a story about what we do when faced with the loss of those we love. Stepping between the fantastical and the real, this modern fairy tale crystalises hope and mourning into a reflection on life itself. Bound in hardback and richly illustrated with evocative artwork by Becky Gough.

146 pages, Hardcover

First published September 23, 2023

About the author

I was born and brought up in Chorlton-cum-Hardy in Manchester. We lived close to wonderful rugged countryside and regularly went on long family hikes exploring forests and moors. Kitted out with my own little rucksack and walking boots, I would go on ahead with my Kendal Mint-Cake for sustenance, and seek out secret little places. The feeling of magic and mystery that surrounded areas like Alderley Edge and Stile Woods are still with me.

I was an only child for the first ten years of my life and found comfort and company in books. I loved fantasy and adventure best, but would devour anything that had a good story and engaging characters. Imagination was, and always has been an integral part of my sense of self.

I studied English and Media at the University of Sussex and have lived in Brighton for over 30 years. I've had a varied career encompassing acting, campaigning, TV journalism, work in local government, and now, leading the UNISON branch at Brighton & Hove City Council. I write across literary genres, including novels, short stories and increasing recently, poetry .

In the last couple of years I have been commissioned by The Royal Literary Society with a piece called Secrets, Relics and Lost Lives, featured on Radio 4’s hugely popular Saturday Live talking about a family history project called The Findings, and had a poem adapted into a song by renowned musician, Ted Barnes.

Most recently I brought my campaigning and writing together with a short film of a poem about the importance of local government, which has now had thousands of views. I play an active part in the Brighton & Hove cultural scene, regularly reading live, performing in festivals, and collaborating with artists, historians and schools through my writing.

I call myself a ‘Mancunian Brightonian’ having made my home in the city-by-the-sea 25 years ago. I live with my husband in a loving if sometimes hectic, patchwork family including two kids each, a dog, two cats and a semi-domesticated Seagull called Gerald!

Reviews

[Priya · Rating 5 out of 5]

4.5 *
This is such a beautiful and quietly profound novella about loss, grief and moving on while treasuring all the precious memories of a loved one.

When John loses his beloved wife Nella suddenly, he is unsure if he can or should go on. His grief isolates him from his children even and he struggles to see their care and concern. Then, in the form of doors that show him the best moments of the past and the path to the future, he learns to accept reality, cope, and finally be happy again.

Remembering special occasions, talking about a loved one with others who knew them, finding ways to carry on doing activities that bring peace, realising that you cannot hold on to or change the past or present and choosing to again see the colours and brightness that life still has to offer are all represented by these doors that John traverses. The emotions are touching and so real.

Anyone who has faced grief of this nature will relate to this story and find it healing and soothing. I definitely did.

[Lottie · Rating 3 out of 5]

3.5 ✨ I found this book to be a short and easy read (which I think are great for palate cleansers or if you're in a bit of a slump.) 

I read it in one sitting and it didn't take long until I felt connected to the story. The author did a great job at describing grief and how people tend to process it differently. The concept of a random door appearing definitely intrigued me and kept me wondering each time what would be on the other side. The way the author described each new element was fantastic and really detailed.

The story got me thinking a lot about how sometimes when you're caught up in mourning, you can often forget that other people around you are struggling too and how much grief can just consume every minute of your day. 

I think a lot of people would be able to understand and sympathise with the main character's feelings and actions throughout the book, especially if you've lost a loved one. 

Overall a fast and enjoyable read that gets you thinking a little deeper about grief.

- Thanks to claret press for an arc in exchange for an honest review

[Dagmara Magdalena · Rating 5 out of 5]

Tenderly written and profoundly moving novella. Love story, friendship story and most of all, a story about loss and how to reconcile with the absence of someone who is no longer here. I loved the structure- shifting perspective and changing narrator's voice from the first to the third person. This felt really true to how we experience personal loss, when it feels as if the journey through grief belongs or should belong to someone else. I loved how the author observed the nuisances of everyday, petty events that creep into our lives, where all we want to do is to surrender. The ongoing motif of Doors opening to different dreamscapes served well to echo the rhythm of a journey through grief. The illustrations were subtle and poetic and complemented this imaginative, sensitive exploration of despair and the power of recovery. I read it in a few settings and felt that the flow was gentle, unrushed. I had time to contemplate and to process my own anticipation of loss. Really grateful for being recommended this book by a friend.

[Henrietta Fernandez · Rating 5 out of 5]

I loved reading this from the heart story. It spoke to me particularly as having lost my father this year, too untimely and knowing what it feels like to feel that loss. The refusal to believe that a close one is no longer here, the games our mind plays. The author spins a realistic yet other worldly tale, that takes you through a mystical door into vast spaces of unknown realities, the protagonist having lost his partner quite suddenly. We go along on the ride, bumping back down to earth with the grim realisation that the loved one will never be seen again, except in memories. A perhaps too short read, as I read in just a few sittings, and I would have loved a little more. However the story is neat and leaves some sense of resolve from a broken heart, and that life does indeed go on. Death touches us all at some point in our lives, 'though remains a subject not examined enough.

[Rachel · Rating 3 out of 5]

3.5 ⭐️⭐️⭐️


"The Door That Shouldn’t Have Been There” is a poignant exploration of grief and the lengths to which one might go to reunite with a lost loved one.

The story follows a husband plunged into sorrow after witnessing his wife open a mysterious door, only to wake up and find her dead beside him. This event sets off a haunting and emotional journey as the door reappears, tempting him with the possibility of seeing his wife again.

It’s a short read packed with lots of emotive writing and the author really conveyed the husband’s grief through each page. My heart really felt for him and his sorrow and desperation was captured in a way that really felt authentic and touching.

Overall, "The Door That Shouldn’t Have Been There" is a heartfelt reflection on love and loss, capturing the essence of grief in a unique and imaginative way.

[Benna Mccartney · Rating 5 out of 5]

I loved the ebb and flow of the ‘Door that shouldn’t have been there’ and how it is written from different perspectives. Throughout the book, I felt completely engrossed. Not only was I there with the main character, seeing what he could see, but also really feeling what he was feeling. I experienced the raw tenderness and apprehension, which he clearly felt going through each door, but was thrilled to go on the journey with him. This is a must read for anyone who has experienced grief and an achingly insightful tale for those who will in the future.

[Reader · Rating 5 out of 5]

I loved reading this story. Couldn’t put it down and read it over three sittings.
A story of grief and love, so beautifully written.
The author has a way of making you feel you are right there, taken into a mysterious world but one that is also at times so familiar. She spins you into other mystical places and then bumps you back into reality.

Grief is a personal thing and something recently close to my heart, but I resonated with the main character and his emotions.

A great story that pulls at your heart strings, is dark in places, but equally light and funny in others. Go read!

[Sue · Rating 5 out of 5]

Loved this book read it in a few hours I couldn't put it down. A beautiful story about death & grief. If only there were doors to connect us to the newly deceased I'd go through it. It would help to process your grief, after losing several important people in my life this would be wonderful just to have that connection to help you through the bad times ahead. I was in the middle of a conversation with my father in law when he suddenly said I've got to go and probably won't see you again look after yourself. He passed five minutes later.

[Claire-Louise Armstrong-Brealey · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book deserves five plus stars. It is an amazing trip into the mind of someone who is grieving.

I am still grieving the death of both my parents and my sister. If I could go through a door and see them, would I? I don't know. I do dream about them often and feel like they are near. That has to suffice.

This man is so raw in his feelings that it almost hurts to read it. But you should and you must!

Excellent!

[Anita · Rating 5 out of 5]

A shortish novel about the power of grief, how it consumes but has to be endured to come out of the other side, and the thing that pulls us through is love.

Losing a loved one is never easy and the will to see them again is so strong - what if you could do this? Your mind can make you think that perhaps you can, but at what cost to your mind and those who love you.

A beautiful, thoughtful book.

[Niall Mcgowan · Rating 4 out of 5]

An imaginative novella of an enduring love in the dream state of grief, sharply observed and truthful in its descriptions of the day to day things recalled by those left behind. There is much that is familiar to anyone who has lived or can imagine the way that memory works as we try to navigate each day of loss at a time. Sharply and touchingly written - recommended.

[James · Rating 5 out of 5]

To my surprise I read this book. I hadn’t really intended to. I picked it up because I was
dealing with my mother who is slipping away from me, lost in a fog of dementia. This book
came the closest to how I feel. It somehow managed to convey the heartbreak and grief, the
confusion and the frustration of it all.

[Kamini Mehta · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is a very difficult book to describe. It's a bit existential, and it took me a bit of just reading and following to really appreciate the author's handling of the layers of grief and the temptation to give up when it all is overwhelming. At it's core this is a love story, both romantic and familial.

[Rebeka · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book is so beautifully made that I intend to keep it forever. IT’s got the most amazing artwork in it that perfectly captures the story. I don’t know if the author commissioned it or it was by accident but it deepened my appreciation for this touching story.

[Daren Kay · Rating 5 out of 5]

Insightful, moving and though intensely personal and original, it tells a story to which anyone who has lost a loved one, can relate.

[julie young · Rating 4 out of 5]

A beautifully told journey through grief. Written in the style of a traditional fairy tale the appearance of the door and the experiences once through it are breathtakingly intense. Such an intriguing tale.

[Audrey · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is a beautifully written novella about grief. It's based on a gentleman who wakes up in the morning to find his wife dead beside him and how grief totally consumed him. Very moving.

[Pamela · Rating 5 out of 5]

This was a good book. A bit different for me,but good nonetheless.
I enjoyed it. Understand the beaverment path well

[Louise Galluzzo · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book is a novella written following the death of the author's father.

I read this after having lost my mother less than a year ago, as well as 4 other relatives and loved ones in the 3/4 months preceding this, and another friend 5 months ago, so to say I've had a traumatic year is a massive understatement.

Due to the number of people I lost in such a short space of time, as well as my emotions being complicated due to my Borderline Personality Disorder, I have been, and still am, struggling with my grief. So I read this in the hope that I might better understand my feelings, and gain an insight into how other people deal with grief.

I certainly recognised some of the feelings I'm struggling with, the shock, the anger, the inability to move on, and how my father is so consumed by his own grief, that he doesn't seem to understand that his children have lost their mother. We are all in our 40s, but she passed suddenly and painfully following a long unrelated illness at the age of 67. It was this depiction of the main character that I most identified with.

It did help me in a way to understand other people can feel the same way in the aftermath of losing a parent, as I don't think I've ever heard or seen this discussed before.

I didn't feel it applied so much to me with my other bereavements, but that's not to say others won't feel differently. I would definitely recommend it to anyone who has a lost a parent, and will likely reread it. I'd like my dad to read this, it might help him to see our (his children's) perspective, although I doubt he'd be willing to read it.