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These Monstrous Deeds #1
These Monstrous Deeds
How long can someone play the role of a monster before becoming a monster themselves?
That’s the question that’s haunted Travis Kenton - A.K.A. Nathan Roarke - for the last 8 years. He’s hanging onto his humanity by a thread. The knowledge that he’ll save thousands of victims one of these days is why he gave up his entire life and identity nearly a decade ago. It has to be worth it. All of this has to be worth it.
Then the operation’s integrity is compromised, the identity of his boss is revealed, and a slave trader captures his boss’s younger brother for revenge. Now Travis will face the biggest test of his role as Nathan Roarke. He’ll have to buy and convincingly own Carter Beckett until his undercover operation is over, and he can hand Carter safely back to his big brother.
How long can someone play the role of a monster before becoming a monster themselves?
Travis is about to find out. *** Due to the nature of the plot, this book contains scenes that some might find triggering and/or disturbing, as well as explicit sex scenes between the main characters. I’ve included the warnings I feel are the most important, but not all could be covered without giving away too much of the novel.
*** This is book 1 in a 3 book series. This series DOES end in a HAPPY ENDING if you’re willing to stick around ***
That’s the question that’s haunted Travis Kenton - A.K.A. Nathan Roarke - for the last 8 years. He’s hanging onto his humanity by a thread. The knowledge that he’ll save thousands of victims one of these days is why he gave up his entire life and identity nearly a decade ago. It has to be worth it. All of this has to be worth it.
Then the operation’s integrity is compromised, the identity of his boss is revealed, and a slave trader captures his boss’s younger brother for revenge. Now Travis will face the biggest test of his role as Nathan Roarke. He’ll have to buy and convincingly own Carter Beckett until his undercover operation is over, and he can hand Carter safely back to his big brother.
How long can someone play the role of a monster before becoming a monster themselves?
Travis is about to find out. *** Due to the nature of the plot, this book contains scenes that some might find triggering and/or disturbing, as well as explicit sex scenes between the main characters. I’ve included the warnings I feel are the most important, but not all could be covered without giving away too much of the novel.
*** This is book 1 in a 3 book series. This series DOES end in a HAPPY ENDING if you’re willing to stick around ***
448 pages, Paperback
First published July 13, 2021
380 people are currently reading
2780 people want to read
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 263 reviews
November 17, 2025
There are 1433 uses of the word “sir”.
Say less fam.
I get that it’s trying to be “master/slave” dynamics but BRUH.
Tonight, I accidentally left my chicken in the oven for 3 hours on 220 degrees and it turned into chicken leather, and it was still juicer than this plot.
Carter wasn’t even a likeable victim??? We didn’t get to know him before he was shoved into this world of sex slaves, so I really feel nothing.
Nathan, a rapist, who is the 'good guy', because he doesn’t want to rape, he just HAS TO rape because otherwise his cover is blown, but he's also got an inner monster and the lines are blurred or whatever because he's so dark and dangerous… (🙄cringe🙄)
"The man is gorgeous. In fact, gorgeous doesn’t even begin to describe him. But he’s also dark and dangerous”
The book really needs you to know that he’s dark and dangerous… just in case you didn’t work it out from THE 90 MENTIONS OF RAPE ON EVERY PAGE omg
I absolutely hate these cunts and see no way that you can go from rapist “monster” to being in love under these conditions.
Also, the cock warming obsession in this book became so common that it felt super random? Is putting your soft man meat in another humans mouth a sign of great power??
Like wow, he’s so hardcore, his soft flaccid vermicelli noodle can flop out and go in a slaves mouth. So powerful, so scary, so dark… 🙄🙄
Yes there are TW’s. But rape dressed up as “master/slave” or “dark”is still rape at its core and I’d rather wait for a bus to roll over a puppy than wait for these two cunts to have a HEA.
Say less fam.
I get that it’s trying to be “master/slave” dynamics but BRUH.
Tonight, I accidentally left my chicken in the oven for 3 hours on 220 degrees and it turned into chicken leather, and it was still juicer than this plot.
Carter wasn’t even a likeable victim??? We didn’t get to know him before he was shoved into this world of sex slaves, so I really feel nothing.
Nathan, a rapist, who is the 'good guy', because he doesn’t want to rape, he just HAS TO rape because otherwise his cover is blown, but he's also got an inner monster and the lines are blurred or whatever because he's so dark and dangerous… (🙄cringe🙄)
"The man is gorgeous. In fact, gorgeous doesn’t even begin to describe him. But he’s also dark and dangerous”
The book really needs you to know that he’s dark and dangerous… just in case you didn’t work it out from THE 90 MENTIONS OF RAPE ON EVERY PAGE omg
I absolutely hate these cunts and see no way that you can go from rapist “monster” to being in love under these conditions.
Also, the cock warming obsession in this book became so common that it felt super random? Is putting your soft man meat in another humans mouth a sign of great power??
Like wow, he’s so hardcore, his soft flaccid vermicelli noodle can flop out and go in a slaves mouth. So powerful, so scary, so dark… 🙄🙄
Yes there are TW’s. But rape dressed up as “master/slave” or “dark”is still rape at its core and I’d rather wait for a bus to roll over a puppy than wait for these two cunts to have a HEA.
November 25, 2022
dnf @ 62%. very repetitive and very underdeveloped, considering the hardcore themes of human trafficking, abuse, non-con, master/slave, etc. the whole plot is super flimsy and basically laughable. the fact that i know this book ends on a cliffhanger and there's two more books makes my head hurt. no thanks.
July 3, 2021
I only read this story until the end because I wanted to see how they would get the bad guys, to just found out it ends in a cliff and we will have a sequel.🤦♀️
Cutting to the chase what didn't work for me:
📌 I found the story one dimensional, too focused on the Master/slave dynamic without exploring other aspects.
📌The whole book presented only 3 parts outside that ☝ bubble.
1-The auction.
2-Todd Henley's visit.
3-A party to make contacts.
Save that 3 occasions, we have a description of a Master/slave routine. It felt too repetitive to me. Wake up, shower, kneel, crawl, warm Master's cock, eat, warm Master's cock in the office, go to bed. Wash, Rinse Repeat.
📌 Carter was too easily convinced that he was NOTHING, just a set of holes.
📌 I didn't buy the speed at which Master fell in love with Carter. Why did he fall for Carter? 🤔 They had nothing in common. Not even the kink, since it was non-consensual. The feelings Master developed towards Carter felt more like a Stockholm syndrome in reverse.🤷♀️
📌 And finally, I really dislike when authors use similar names when characters are interacting. Carter and Casey shared a chunk of heavy stuff when the story started and it was very distracting to follow what was happening to whom since we were not familiar with them yet.
👇👇
Someone grabs Carter from behind. He gasps, trying to remember how to fight. All he can think is that this is it. This is when he’s going to die.
But then his eyes focus, and his lungs recognize the air they’re getting, and the world tilts back to where it belongs, and Carter sees that it’s Casey who has him. The young man is running his hands over Carter’s skin, calming him. When Carter starts to sob, Casey pulls him in and holds him close. He lets Carter sob uncontrollably until he has nothing left inside himself. When they pull apart, he sees tears on Casey’s face as well. He thought maybe he’d feel better knowing Casey isn’t as unaffected as he pretends to be, but it feels even worse. Carter goes to sleep a while later, the thought in his mind that maybe it’d be nice if he doesn’t wake up again. But Carter does wake up.
** This book has lots of great reviews, you better ignore my thoughts and give this a go.
June 21, 2021
content warning for: rape, abuse, degradation, torture
This one fucked me up both my head and my emotions. A romance between a sex slave and the 'sir' who bought him. Ugh, saying its romance chills me. And lastly in the end, I can't believe I rooted for the monster. God, forgive me. This story gave me the greenlight to read more distrubing/dark romances. My body and soul are now ready. This review is sooo vague because this story gripped and shocked me and I hope the next readers will experience the same.
"He's a commodity. He's not human. He never will be again. It's starting to get easier to remember that. He should be terrified, but he's not. He's relieved."
This one fucked me up both my head and my emotions. A romance between a sex slave and the 'sir' who bought him. Ugh, saying its romance chills me. And lastly in the end, I can't believe I rooted for the monster. God, forgive me. This story gave me the greenlight to read more distrubing/dark romances. My body and soul are now ready. This review is sooo vague because this story gripped and shocked me and I hope the next readers will experience the same.
January 2, 2026
* ☘︎ :･ﾟTOP 5 READ 2025 :･ﾟ☘︎ *
4.5***** stars
This, my dear friends, is NOT for the faint of heart. Darkest of romance that is horrific to read in many part, very well deserving of the label.
⇢ PLEASE HEED TRIGGER WARNINGS!!
*************
These Monstrous Deeds Series
Book 1 - These Monstrous Deeds - 4.5 stars
Book 2 - A Dangerous Game - 4.25 stars
Book 3 - One Last Time - 4.5 stars
⇢ Sequel Series: Monstrous Survivors
4.5***** stars
This, my dear friends, is NOT for the faint of heart. Darkest of romance that is horrific to read in many part, very well deserving of the label.
“I took his virginity.”
Benny’s attention snaps to him, his eyes wide. “What?”
“The night of the auction.” Nathan lifts his gaze, forcing himself to look at Benny. “When I raped him. When I raped Carter up on stage while he sobbed and begged for help, while men and women laughed at him, while they yelled awful fucking things to him, while he was starving and hurting and – and fucking breaking apart, I took his virginity.”
⇢ PLEASE HEED TRIGGER WARNINGS!!
*************
These Monstrous Deeds Series
Book 1 - These Monstrous Deeds - 4.5 stars
Book 2 - A Dangerous Game - 4.25 stars
Book 3 - One Last Time - 4.5 stars
⇢ Sequel Series: Monstrous Survivors
July 7, 2021
WARNING: THIS IS A TRILOGY!!!! I didn't know that when I started this. Fuck my life. 🥲
This was... I can't even begin to explain how fucked up this was, I mean is easy to imagine when you have an undercover agent trying to take down the human trafficking business... Said agent has to rescue his friend and colague's little brother of being sold. How is gonna do that? By buying him and making him his slave. Smartssss. 🤨🤨
Do I need to say more? At 30% of the book you know everything is fucked up and it will keep being fucked up because it's just a fucked up situation. And the guys are nice, like the one who was chosen to be the "capo" has a sweet heart and the guy's little brother is also sweet as hell. 🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️
And that's when I knew the content I was reading wasn't believable but I didn't care, still I'll share my points for reference:
- Nathan being chosen as the head of the operation, I don't get it, that guy is weak as hell. Getting distracted thanks to a boy in the middle of a discussion? WEAK!!
- WHO THE HELL THOUGHT THAT IT WAS A GOOD MOVE TO NOT TELL THE BOY THE TRUTH? WHO? They need a trophy for that brilliance! "Oh no, Carter doesn't know how to act, he won't be able to fake it, ñiñiñiñi!" Ya think that in the situation the boy is in he won't do it? He ain't stupid!! Now he's got a Jekyll and Hyde shit going and that's on you FBI!
- The story focused a lot on those two, for a organization that deals with trafficking all day Nathan had a lot of time to fuck. 🤷🏻♀️🤷🏻♀️
- Carter was also really ridiculous! You are in a situation were u need to be more smart and alert my friend, all he does is cry and say he's sorry. Don't get me wrong a meltdown is spected, but he just does that. Where is your survival mode?
- Also Carter, tell Natahn to go fuck himself thank you very much! 🤨
Did I mind? No I didn't, I enjoyed it, I was hypnotized, I couldn't put it down, I rolled my eyes while also clutching my pearls!
So yeah. I NEED BOOK TWO NOW! 😑😑
This was... I can't even begin to explain how fucked up this was, I mean is easy to imagine when you have an undercover agent trying to take down the human trafficking business... Said agent has to rescue his friend and colague's little brother of being sold. How is gonna do that? By buying him and making him his slave. Smartssss. 🤨🤨
Do I need to say more? At 30% of the book you know everything is fucked up and it will keep being fucked up because it's just a fucked up situation. And the guys are nice, like the one who was chosen to be the "capo" has a sweet heart and the guy's little brother is also sweet as hell. 🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️
And that's when I knew the content I was reading wasn't believable but I didn't care, still I'll share my points for reference:
- Nathan being chosen as the head of the operation, I don't get it, that guy is weak as hell. Getting distracted thanks to a boy in the middle of a discussion? WEAK!!
- WHO THE HELL THOUGHT THAT IT WAS A GOOD MOVE TO NOT TELL THE BOY THE TRUTH? WHO? They need a trophy for that brilliance! "Oh no, Carter doesn't know how to act, he won't be able to fake it, ñiñiñiñi!" Ya think that in the situation the boy is in he won't do it? He ain't stupid!! Now he's got a Jekyll and Hyde shit going and that's on you FBI!
- The story focused a lot on those two, for a organization that deals with trafficking all day Nathan had a lot of time to fuck. 🤷🏻♀️🤷🏻♀️
- Carter was also really ridiculous! You are in a situation were u need to be more smart and alert my friend, all he does is cry and say he's sorry. Don't get me wrong a meltdown is spected, but he just does that. Where is your survival mode?
- Also Carter, tell Natahn to go fuck himself thank you very much! 🤨
Did I mind? No I didn't, I enjoyed it, I was hypnotized, I couldn't put it down, I rolled my eyes while also clutching my pearls!
So yeah. I NEED BOOK TWO NOW! 😑😑
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
May 28, 2025
I’m so fucking SICK over this book. One of thee darkest things I’ve ever read. I couldn’t stop crying. Pain pain pain fucking PAIN!!
I don’t know how there will be a HEA. But I am rooting for them and especially in Carters Monster and that’s the most fucked up thing, because he did some of thee worst things you can do to a human EVER. Jesus Christ I am unwell.
Send help. And maybe a Xanax to get through the other two books!
I don’t know how there will be a HEA. But I am rooting for them and especially in Carters Monster and that’s the most fucked up thing, because he did some of thee worst things you can do to a human EVER. Jesus Christ I am unwell.
Send help. And maybe a Xanax to get through the other two books!
July 19, 2021
This was like a car crash of a book I just couldn't stop reading even though it was so incredibly bad. I normally don't waste time on stories I am this annoyed by but something just kept me going to the last page and now I'm almost mad I finished it.
Everything about this does not work. The premise is laughably flimsy. There was zero effort or time spent on making the supposed trafficking organisation believable. The whole organisation has no structure that I can detect, the supposed organisation Nathan works for is never named let alone do we find out who finances it or which government they are operating for this internationally.
And what super rich, super violent criminal lives in what seems to essentially be a frat house where he has to basically play a role in front of his own men all the time. None, that's who. Which is why the whole plot idea makes no sense from the get-go. Let's not even really dive into the idea that the boys' brother would honestly willingly let him stay in the role as sex slave for one second longer than necessary when Nathan gets his hands on him.
And of course they have to fall in love during their whole ordeal because what love story doesn't flourish while one partner repeatedly rapes the other in front of an audience?
This could have been filthy, dark fun. Instead it's an insulting mess
Everything about this does not work. The premise is laughably flimsy. There was zero effort or time spent on making the supposed trafficking organisation believable. The whole organisation has no structure that I can detect, the supposed organisation Nathan works for is never named let alone do we find out who finances it or which government they are operating for this internationally.
And what super rich, super violent criminal lives in what seems to essentially be a frat house where he has to basically play a role in front of his own men all the time. None, that's who. Which is why the whole plot idea makes no sense from the get-go. Let's not even really dive into the idea that the boys' brother would honestly willingly let him stay in the role as sex slave for one second longer than necessary when Nathan gets his hands on him.
And of course they have to fall in love during their whole ordeal because what love story doesn't flourish while one partner repeatedly rapes the other in front of an audience?
This could have been filthy, dark fun. Instead it's an insulting mess
September 6, 2021
4.2
”gut-wrenching”
stars
tw: rape/sexual assault, sex trafficking/slavery, physical violence, degradation, psychological torture, suicidal ideation
He just loves this version of sir so much. The version who cares. The version that’s almost…human.
The smile slips away when he realizes how dangerous it is for him to enjoy this version of the monster. This version isn’t real. It’s only a matter of time before Carter gets hurt again.
Sir isn’t human.
Neither is Carter.
It’s best he remembers that.
These Monstrous Deeds is one of the darkest, most haunting books I’ve ever read. The trigger warnings should really be heeded. Unimaginable brutality and the worst aspects of human nature are depicted. But there also moments of tenderness and glimpses of joy to leaven the sheer ugliness. Nathan and Carter’s relationship gives new meaning to the term dark romance, but I question whether the term romance is correct. We have two people in forced proximity in a twisted world. They are the only sources of kindness and light in this world; how could they not be drawn to each other?
Travis Kenton: Travis Kenton, aka, Nathan Roarke, is an agent in a secret government operation tasked with bringing down an international trafficking ring. He’s assumed an undercover identity as Nathan Roarke—a wealthy, ruthless, human trafficking kingpin. He’s been operating under this identity for eight years and it’s taken a heavy toll on him. He fears that he’s lost Travis and his humanity in the process. His greatest fear is that he’s become a monster. But you see the continuous battle being waged internally between Travis and Nathan.
Carter Beckett: Carter is a twenty-two-year-old college student and the brother of Nathan’s best friend, Maison. Maison is also the commander of the secret operation to bring down the trafficking ring. Carter is kidnapped by a group of human traffickers once Maison’s identity is blown. The traffickers put Carter up for sale in a slave auction as payback for the operation. Nathan is tasked with buying Carter and becoming his owner. Carter is an intelligent character and brave. Although he is raped, abused and traumatized, he manages to maintain a positive spirit throughout everything.
Highlights
The characterization is stunning and both main characters really come to life. Carter leaps off the page. You can vividly picture his private hell every step of the way—first as a kidnap victim and then as a sex slave. Plucky and incredibly resilient, he also has a refreshing air of innocence about him. And he doesn’t lose his humanity or ability to laugh despite his circumstances.
“Carter doesn’t know if he can survive years.
But Carter doesn’t want to die.
He’s too young to die.
There are so many things left to do. So much left for him to learn and see.
He’s not finished.”
The inner conflict between Travis/Nathan is monumental. Travis’s toughest test occurs when he becomes Carter’s master. He is forced to rape and punish Carter in front of other people in order to stay in character with his Nathan persona. He hates himself for getting aroused when he rapes Carter and feels destined for hell. And he still feels guilty even when Carter consents to sex and enjoys it given their master/slave dynamic. He is tormented and being Nathan almost breaks him.
“Nathan hurries to turn back to Carter, squeezing his eyes shut. He focuses on the feel of his expensive suit wrapped around his body. The weight of the jacket. The silky material of his dress shirt. The cinch of his ties. The fabric that cups his ass. The buttery soft leather shoes that are perfectly molded to his feet. The cool metal of his watch.
His suit.
His armor.
His costume.
Travis isn’t here right now. Travis no longer exists. It’s just Nathan Roarke. Ruthless. Evil. Monster.”
The only way I could read this book was by creating emotional distance with Carter. I wondered why Nathan’s character stuck with me more and why I identified more strongly with him—the hero who did such monstrous things. And then I realized that I couldn’t allow myself to identify with Carter because being Carter is too scary. I didn’t want to and couldn’t afford to be in that mental space. He has so many atrocities committed on his body and undergoes such psychological torture. The only way I could stomach reading this was at an emotional remove from Carter. That is how painful his world is.
“Carter was prepared to live this new existence. He was prepared for this to be his world.
Then sir gave him to Todd.
Sir let Todd abuse him.
Sir used another slave.
Sir proved that Carter isn’t special.
Nothing makes sense anymore.
Nothing feels even slightly okay.”
At first, I found it a bit unrealistic/improbable for Nathan to fall in love with Carter. I could see Carter falling in love given how Stockholm syndrome works. But the rationale didn’t seem as clear cut with Nathan initially. However, the more I thought about it, the more it made sense. Nathan has had to don the mask of a monster for eight years during which time he’s been starved for affection, decency, and kindness. And then Carter walks in, who represents all these qualities. Carter is also vulnerable and completely dependent on him and arouses all his protective and possessive instincts. He also arouses lust and a sense of tenderness in him. And Nathan can’t stop fantasizing about what things would be like if they had met under normal circumstances.
Quibble
My major quibble is a long dream sequence (thirteen pages) that Carter has. Carter has a nightmare that captures his internal conflict between compromises he has to make to survive as a sex slave, while fighting not to lose his identity. He fears that he has become complicit and too comfortable with his situation. He is falling in love with his master, Nathan. Carter questions whether he has lost his desire to escape. The dream is repetitive and keeps revisiting this conflict between giving in to sir/Nathan versus fighting to escape. You could easily cut eight pages from the dream without losing its essence.
tw: rape/sexual assault, sex trafficking/slavery, physical violence, degradation, psychological torture, suicidal ideation
He just loves this version of sir so much. The version who cares. The version that’s almost…human.
The smile slips away when he realizes how dangerous it is for him to enjoy this version of the monster. This version isn’t real. It’s only a matter of time before Carter gets hurt again.
Sir isn’t human.
Neither is Carter.
It’s best he remembers that.
These Monstrous Deeds is one of the darkest, most haunting books I’ve ever read. The trigger warnings should really be heeded. Unimaginable brutality and the worst aspects of human nature are depicted. But there also moments of tenderness and glimpses of joy to leaven the sheer ugliness. Nathan and Carter’s relationship gives new meaning to the term dark romance, but I question whether the term romance is correct. We have two people in forced proximity in a twisted world. They are the only sources of kindness and light in this world; how could they not be drawn to each other?
Travis Kenton: Travis Kenton, aka, Nathan Roarke, is an agent in a secret government operation tasked with bringing down an international trafficking ring. He’s assumed an undercover identity as Nathan Roarke—a wealthy, ruthless, human trafficking kingpin. He’s been operating under this identity for eight years and it’s taken a heavy toll on him. He fears that he’s lost Travis and his humanity in the process. His greatest fear is that he’s become a monster. But you see the continuous battle being waged internally between Travis and Nathan.
Carter Beckett: Carter is a twenty-two-year-old college student and the brother of Nathan’s best friend, Maison. Maison is also the commander of the secret operation to bring down the trafficking ring. Carter is kidnapped by a group of human traffickers once Maison’s identity is blown. The traffickers put Carter up for sale in a slave auction as payback for the operation. Nathan is tasked with buying Carter and becoming his owner. Carter is an intelligent character and brave. Although he is raped, abused and traumatized, he manages to maintain a positive spirit throughout everything.
Highlights
The characterization is stunning and both main characters really come to life. Carter leaps off the page. You can vividly picture his private hell every step of the way—first as a kidnap victim and then as a sex slave. Plucky and incredibly resilient, he also has a refreshing air of innocence about him. And he doesn’t lose his humanity or ability to laugh despite his circumstances.
“Carter doesn’t know if he can survive years.
But Carter doesn’t want to die.
He’s too young to die.
There are so many things left to do. So much left for him to learn and see.
He’s not finished.”
The inner conflict between Travis/Nathan is monumental. Travis’s toughest test occurs when he becomes Carter’s master. He is forced to rape and punish Carter in front of other people in order to stay in character with his Nathan persona. He hates himself for getting aroused when he rapes Carter and feels destined for hell. And he still feels guilty even when Carter consents to sex and enjoys it given their master/slave dynamic. He is tormented and being Nathan almost breaks him.
“Nathan hurries to turn back to Carter, squeezing his eyes shut. He focuses on the feel of his expensive suit wrapped around his body. The weight of the jacket. The silky material of his dress shirt. The cinch of his ties. The fabric that cups his ass. The buttery soft leather shoes that are perfectly molded to his feet. The cool metal of his watch.
His suit.
His armor.
His costume.
Travis isn’t here right now. Travis no longer exists. It’s just Nathan Roarke. Ruthless. Evil. Monster.”
The only way I could read this book was by creating emotional distance with Carter. I wondered why Nathan’s character stuck with me more and why I identified more strongly with him—the hero who did such monstrous things. And then I realized that I couldn’t allow myself to identify with Carter because being Carter is too scary. I didn’t want to and couldn’t afford to be in that mental space. He has so many atrocities committed on his body and undergoes such psychological torture. The only way I could stomach reading this was at an emotional remove from Carter. That is how painful his world is.
“Carter was prepared to live this new existence. He was prepared for this to be his world.
Then sir gave him to Todd.
Sir let Todd abuse him.
Sir used another slave.
Sir proved that Carter isn’t special.
Nothing makes sense anymore.
Nothing feels even slightly okay.”
At first, I found it a bit unrealistic/improbable for Nathan to fall in love with Carter. I could see Carter falling in love given how Stockholm syndrome works. But the rationale didn’t seem as clear cut with Nathan initially. However, the more I thought about it, the more it made sense. Nathan has had to don the mask of a monster for eight years during which time he’s been starved for affection, decency, and kindness. And then Carter walks in, who represents all these qualities. Carter is also vulnerable and completely dependent on him and arouses all his protective and possessive instincts. He also arouses lust and a sense of tenderness in him. And Nathan can’t stop fantasizing about what things would be like if they had met under normal circumstances.
Quibble
My major quibble is a long dream sequence (thirteen pages) that Carter has. Carter has a nightmare that captures his internal conflict between compromises he has to make to survive as a sex slave, while fighting not to lose his identity. He fears that he has become complicit and too comfortable with his situation. He is falling in love with his master, Nathan. Carter questions whether he has lost his desire to escape. The dream is repetitive and keeps revisiting this conflict between giving in to sir/Nathan versus fighting to escape. You could easily cut eight pages from the dream without losing its essence.
June 22, 2021
This is a hauntingly beautiful book about two people who are sucked into the world of sexual slavery. The only difference is that one of them is the victim and another is his tormentor. It's soul-crushing but so well written and filled with vivid images that you will be immersed in this dark world even before you realize it.
Note- Even with the risk of sounding like a scout leader, I would say
• Please read the TW because this book has humiliation, degradation, abuse ( not all are sexual), human trafficking, rape and it is really ( like really) a dark romance.
• I literally cried 3-5 times and, mind you it's quite a rare thing for me.
•I would also like to thank @Cal because otherwise, I would have certainly missed reading this book.😇😇
Note- Even with the risk of sounding like a scout leader, I would say
• Please read the TW because this book has humiliation, degradation, abuse ( not all are sexual), human trafficking, rape and it is really ( like really) a dark romance.
• I literally cried 3-5 times and, mind you it's quite a rare thing for me.
•I would also like to thank @Cal because otherwise, I would have certainly missed reading this book.😇😇
July 27, 2024
3ish stars. I enjoyed the premise, but the execution, repetition, and editing issues decreased my rating. Full RTC, add it to the big review later pile!
March 30, 2023
5++++++ BRUTAL RAW STARS STORY!
On to book 2!
On to book 2!
August 29, 2025
This is a review for the whole series. I honestly had to read all three books before I could really form my opinion… I was just too angry to have coherent thoughts after book one. I had the see where the story was going and I have to say that while the story as a whole is really horrific and devastating, the way the author created the HEA was really amazing. I devoured these books! And even though I really had my doubts about some of these characters, by the end I loved them all.
So first off this is beyond dark. This series is about trafficking and nothing is held back. At. All. So please please be warned of that. There is a light at the end of the tunnel but it’s a very long dark tunnel. The story centers around Nathan and Carter who are intertwined with the worst kind of abuse and trauma you can imagine. Love starts to form between these two people that in reality it should not, but you can’t look away!
Poor Carter is put through so much that by the end of book one you don’t care how he gets his happiness, you just want him to have a sliver of sunshine. Just a single act of kindness! Nathan/Travis is a monster. There’s no doubt, the things he does… the question becomes: is a monster ever redeemable? It takes quite a while to find out. If you can stomach the long road, (I feel) it will pay off in the end. I will definitely be reading the spin off stories, I’m very invested in all these characters.
Contemporary MM
Pitch Black Romance
Sex Trafficking
Captor/Captive
Abuse, Non-Con
BDSM, Dom/Sub
Spice: 🔥🔥🔥🔥
**************
I’m not sure how to review this yet. Right now the only emotion that I have is a lot of anger. I honestly think that I have to read the whole series before I can even properly put down what I’m feeling. It really just depends on how this series plays out.
It feels like it’s five stars because I could not put it down. Five angry stars 😅
So first off this is beyond dark. This series is about trafficking and nothing is held back. At. All. So please please be warned of that. There is a light at the end of the tunnel but it’s a very long dark tunnel. The story centers around Nathan and Carter who are intertwined with the worst kind of abuse and trauma you can imagine. Love starts to form between these two people that in reality it should not, but you can’t look away!
Poor Carter is put through so much that by the end of book one you don’t care how he gets his happiness, you just want him to have a sliver of sunshine. Just a single act of kindness! Nathan/Travis is a monster. There’s no doubt, the things he does… the question becomes: is a monster ever redeemable? It takes quite a while to find out. If you can stomach the long road, (I feel) it will pay off in the end. I will definitely be reading the spin off stories, I’m very invested in all these characters.
Contemporary MM
Pitch Black Romance
Sex Trafficking
Captor/Captive
Abuse, Non-Con
BDSM, Dom/Sub
Spice: 🔥🔥🔥🔥
**************
I’m not sure how to review this yet. Right now the only emotion that I have is a lot of anger. I honestly think that I have to read the whole series before I can even properly put down what I’m feeling. It really just depends on how this series plays out.
It feels like it’s five stars because I could not put it down. Five angry stars 😅
July 2, 2024
4.5 stars.
So I'm reading this after finishing the Veterans Of Callenburg Series (which was 5 stars, btw). This was a really engrossing read that I couldn't put down.
This was a lot darker as it takes place within the actual underground human trafficking world with masters and their human slaves.
At times, it is pretty graphic and distressing, but that's to be expected if you're going to read a book like this. This book is not kinky CNC stuff (although at times the MCs do try this out but consent is still iffy given the context). It has moments of graphic scenes depicting the HT underground world of rape, abuse, torture, degradation and deprivation, etc. So please make sure you're across the TWs.
In this environment, a master, Nathan, who is really an undercover cop, is super close to shutting it all down at great personal cost. He falls for his slave, Carter (who doesn't know), but still has to play the part and lines get really fucked up and blurry. The moments between Nathan and Carter when they are able to take off their master and slave personas provides some sweetness and respite from the despair faced by the MCs in this environment.
The author made some writing and plot choices (not gonna spoil) that I'm still getting my head around / making up my mind about, and I'm open to seeing how it all fits together as part of a three book series. I'll probably write a series review at the end.
This one ends of a pretty decent cliffhanger, and HFN doesn't really apply to a story like this, so I'm off to start the next one, A Dangerous Game rn because I need to know how this all ends.
So I'm reading this after finishing the Veterans Of Callenburg Series (which was 5 stars, btw). This was a really engrossing read that I couldn't put down.
This was a lot darker as it takes place within the actual underground human trafficking world with masters and their human slaves.
At times, it is pretty graphic and distressing, but that's to be expected if you're going to read a book like this. This book is not kinky CNC stuff (although at times the MCs do try this out but consent is still iffy given the context). It has moments of graphic scenes depicting the HT underground world of rape, abuse, torture, degradation and deprivation, etc. So please make sure you're across the TWs.
In this environment, a master, Nathan, who is really an undercover cop, is super close to shutting it all down at great personal cost. He falls for his slave, Carter (who doesn't know), but still has to play the part and lines get really fucked up and blurry. The moments between Nathan and Carter when they are able to take off their master and slave personas provides some sweetness and respite from the despair faced by the MCs in this environment.
The author made some writing and plot choices (not gonna spoil) that I'm still getting my head around / making up my mind about, and I'm open to seeing how it all fits together as part of a three book series. I'll probably write a series review at the end.
This one ends of a pretty decent cliffhanger, and HFN doesn't really apply to a story like this, so I'm off to start the next one, A Dangerous Game rn because I need to know how this all ends.
June 20, 2021
This book was devastating but I was engrossed throughout. Sex trafficking books are usually too dark me, but the author's writing made it so engaging! I loved the emotions, the intensity, the imperfect characters. This does end in a cliffhanger but the author promises a happy ending. So I will impatiently wait for the next book!
May 13, 2024
The most *fucked* book I’ve ever read. God what the fuck. Going straight to book 2 I guess lol.
July 30, 2024
Ok, so I waited until I had read all three books before writing any reviews because I just NEEDED to know what the outcome of this story was! I read all three within 24 hours 😂 BUT I do have mixed opinions.
What I struggled with was these books being written in 3rd person POV. I hate it. It detaches me from the emotion of the story and it's like the equivalent of watching the news on TV - yes it's horrific and harrowing and upsetting, but because I'm not directly experiencing it and instead I'm hearing it 'second hand' rather than from the source, I really struggle to get emotionally invested no matter how devastating the plot is. If this had been first person I guarantee I would have solidly 5 starred every book in the series because I would not have been able to control my emotional response.
I liked how the complexity of the relationship between Carter and Nathan was handled - it did feel believable and definitely Stockholm Syndrome-esque. I did struggle to be ok with what was happening though, and maybe that 3rd person POV detachment did actually help by not immersing me in the trauma alongside Carter...who knows! I just empathised with Carter so much when he found out what was happening to him, and his devastation and reactions were more than justified, but at the same time I understand why everything was done the way it was now that I've read them all. I also liked how it was made clear that this was a deep cover operation with a lot of grey/black areas, and not just a standard romance, because if Carter had just outright idolised Nathan and worshipped the ground he walked on then I would not have been interested in finding out what happens to everyone.
All I do know is that once I finally got into the story (around the 50% mark) I just needed to know EVERYTHING. I told myself I was going to read a lighter book between each of these books but I couldn't stop myself from just ploughing through them!
What I struggled with was these books being written in 3rd person POV. I hate it. It detaches me from the emotion of the story and it's like the equivalent of watching the news on TV - yes it's horrific and harrowing and upsetting, but because I'm not directly experiencing it and instead I'm hearing it 'second hand' rather than from the source, I really struggle to get emotionally invested no matter how devastating the plot is. If this had been first person I guarantee I would have solidly 5 starred every book in the series because I would not have been able to control my emotional response.
I liked how the complexity of the relationship between Carter and Nathan was handled - it did feel believable and definitely Stockholm Syndrome-esque. I did struggle to be ok with what was happening though, and maybe that 3rd person POV detachment did actually help by not immersing me in the trauma alongside Carter...who knows! I just empathised with Carter so much when he found out what was happening to him, and his devastation and reactions were more than justified, but at the same time I understand why everything was done the way it was now that I've read them all. I also liked how it was made clear that this was a deep cover operation with a lot of grey/black areas, and not just a standard romance, because if Carter had just outright idolised Nathan and worshipped the ground he walked on then I would not have been interested in finding out what happens to everyone.
All I do know is that once I finally got into the story (around the 50% mark) I just needed to know EVERYTHING. I told myself I was going to read a lighter book between each of these books but I couldn't stop myself from just ploughing through them!
July 15, 2023
5⭐️ Most intensely emotional book I’ve ever read.
The intensity just never lets up and I lost count of how many times I cried. The author just whips you back and forth between anxiety, revulsion, and sweet tenderness and hot lust. I don’t know how she managed to make such a dark story sweetly romantic but she succeeded.
It’s genius how she slowly warms you up to the depravity so that you don’t even realize you’re in a vat of boiling hot brutality… but cannot stop reading.
Carter is a 22 yr old student, kidnapped and sold into sex slavery by a sadistic group of human traffickers.
Nathan is a major kingpin in the sex slave trade. But he’s also an undercover agent for an elite government agency trying to dismantle the trade! And Carter just happens to be another agent’s little brother. He has no choice but to buy Carter as his personal sex slave in order to save him, but he has to make it look realistic— public rape, degradation, torture, and domination for weeks/months on end and Carter cannot know who he truly is. And OMG, Nathan LOATHES himself for it. Nathan, a sweet man at his core, has made himself into a monster and you truly feel for him.
The story is told in dual POV so you get both sides of these broken, traumatized men.
As difficult as this was to read, it was expertly written and I absolutely loved it. A top read of the year for sure.
It ends in a cliffhanger and I am jumping into book 2 immediately.
“This is the confusing man who buys sex slaves but treats them kindly. This is the sad boy so starved for touch he just might beg the man for more of it.”
“Dipping sauce? Did his rapist just ask him if he’d like dipping sauce with his chicken nuggets from fucking McDonalds?”
“When is a monster not a monster?
Oh, when you love it.”
The intensity just never lets up and I lost count of how many times I cried. The author just whips you back and forth between anxiety, revulsion, and sweet tenderness and hot lust. I don’t know how she managed to make such a dark story sweetly romantic but she succeeded.
It’s genius how she slowly warms you up to the depravity so that you don’t even realize you’re in a vat of boiling hot brutality… but cannot stop reading.
Carter is a 22 yr old student, kidnapped and sold into sex slavery by a sadistic group of human traffickers.
Nathan is a major kingpin in the sex slave trade. But he’s also an undercover agent for an elite government agency trying to dismantle the trade! And Carter just happens to be another agent’s little brother. He has no choice but to buy Carter as his personal sex slave in order to save him, but he has to make it look realistic— public rape, degradation, torture, and domination for weeks/months on end and Carter cannot know who he truly is. And OMG, Nathan LOATHES himself for it. Nathan, a sweet man at his core, has made himself into a monster and you truly feel for him.
The story is told in dual POV so you get both sides of these broken, traumatized men.
As difficult as this was to read, it was expertly written and I absolutely loved it. A top read of the year for sure.
It ends in a cliffhanger and I am jumping into book 2 immediately.
“This is the confusing man who buys sex slaves but treats them kindly. This is the sad boy so starved for touch he just might beg the man for more of it.”
“Dipping sauce? Did his rapist just ask him if he’d like dipping sauce with his chicken nuggets from fucking McDonalds?”
“When is a monster not a monster?
Oh, when you love it.”
July 19, 2023
I'm not quite sure what to even write. This was so very upsetting and emotional the entire time. It was relentless in the drama, fear, torture, assult, degredation - it was DARK. Dark. Dark. But we have these two beautifully human and lost souls that I instantly connected with on a very deep level. There was softness, passion and vulnerability but, boy howdy, do you have to go through it for those times!!!
Check the TWs with this one - if on page assault (repeatedly) is an issue, this isn't for you. It is gruesome and very graphic. It is also present throughout the book. It never gets easier - really just worse, honestly. BUT if you like it dark and you're less sensitive to such things, this book is absolutely incredible!!
I really appreciated that we didn't have to wait to know who was who and why certain people were doing certain things. In some ways, it made it worse because you knew there was no real alternative. It was very much punishing one to save many - and it hurt. There were times it hurt like hell. I cried - a lot!!! The most simple acts were so touching and soul shattering.
The way that both Nathan and Carter needed to be protected and saved felt necessary and yet insufficient at the same time. There were extremely bad people in this book - depths of depravity bad guys. And poor Carter was kept from knowing anything. He was a true victim. Nathan's story was much more complex and equally heartbreaking in many ways. Neither knew any peace with the exception of fleeting moments together - when they could almost silence the world around but there was always an uncurrent of unease.
I am not ok! I need to know what happens so I'm diving into book 2 immediately!
Check the TWs with this one - if on page assault (repeatedly) is an issue, this isn't for you. It is gruesome and very graphic. It is also present throughout the book. It never gets easier - really just worse, honestly. BUT if you like it dark and you're less sensitive to such things, this book is absolutely incredible!!
I really appreciated that we didn't have to wait to know who was who and why certain people were doing certain things. In some ways, it made it worse because you knew there was no real alternative. It was very much punishing one to save many - and it hurt. There were times it hurt like hell. I cried - a lot!!! The most simple acts were so touching and soul shattering.
The way that both Nathan and Carter needed to be protected and saved felt necessary and yet insufficient at the same time. There were extremely bad people in this book - depths of depravity bad guys. And poor Carter was kept from knowing anything. He was a true victim. Nathan's story was much more complex and equally heartbreaking in many ways. Neither knew any peace with the exception of fleeting moments together - when they could almost silence the world around but there was always an uncurrent of unease.
I am not ok! I need to know what happens so I'm diving into book 2 immediately!
August 27, 2023
I expected more from a story with so many triggers.
But, even with the extreme setting of the book, all of what Carter had to endure... I just couldn't get past the insta-love. They both fell in love with the other in mere days. And yes I know this is fiction but there is a limit to when we can use that as an excuse and a book where the MCs is a sex trafficker and his slave... that doesn't work. Sorry. I can't let that go. It was jarring.
As was all the sweethearts and good boys that were said in the book. It was too much
The whole book could have been cut in half. So repetitive. Most of it was Carter crying and apologizing while Nathan said sweetheart and good boy and apologizing himself
I honestly wanted to DNF multiple times but kept at it
I think with a bit of tweaking this book could be so much better. I will continue book one to see where this might go though.
But, even with the extreme setting of the book, all of what Carter had to endure... I just couldn't get past the insta-love. They both fell in love with the other in mere days. And yes I know this is fiction but there is a limit to when we can use that as an excuse and a book where the MCs is a sex trafficker and his slave... that doesn't work. Sorry. I can't let that go. It was jarring.
As was all the sweethearts and good boys that were said in the book. It was too much
The whole book could have been cut in half. So repetitive. Most of it was Carter crying and apologizing while Nathan said sweetheart and good boy and apologizing himself
I honestly wanted to DNF multiple times but kept at it
I think with a bit of tweaking this book could be so much better. I will continue book one to see where this might go though.
November 6, 2024
4.5 for this VERY dark “romance”. Read all of the trigger warnings, or pay attention to other reviews, so you’re not caught off guard by anything. It does not end with a HEA, which means I’ll be diving into book two soon to see what happens next.
June 23, 2021
Read this author’s trigger warnings! This book is profoundly dark and deals with some of the most disturbing material I’ve read. The author does a good job disclosing this and the book shouldn’t be judged based on someone not being prepared.
This is a book about sex slavery. Everything is nonconsensual even when it’s “consensual.” There’s some Stockholm syndrome going on here and the level of mindfuckery is intense. You can’t possibly hate the person you should hate because this author makes you feel like he has no other option. He’s actually a hero and he’s absolutely torn by his actions. I felt bad for a rapist. That’s some good storytelling. I also felt uncomfortable for a lot of this book and hated how much I liked it. And I really liked it at times.
I wavered between 3 and 4 stars for pretty much one reason: the “consensual” sex bothered me. It was incredibly tame in comparison to everything else going on, but it just felt wrong for the situation. We’ve got two emotionally fragile MCs and that’s the kind of sex the author chooses to have them connect? I didn’t like it. I actually enjoyed the sex between Carter and Sir better, which really fucked with my head. I felt like Carter needed something else, especially after his evening with Henley. And Nathan felt like an abusive monster but does that to Carter? Nah. Not feeling it. Honestly, it was more the language used beforehand than the actual act and it gave me anxiety anticipating what would happen. Couldn’t actually imagine Carter being okay with it. If it was just that one scene I probably could have let it go and given 4 stars, but it happened...kind of...near the end and reminded me how much that dynamic bothered me.
That being said, I could really see how this could be a 4 star book for a lot of people. It was fascinating. I had trouble putting it down and I really wanted to know where it was going. How is this going to be a trilogy? I’m so stressed thinking about that. How can our MCs possibly have a happy ending?! I will 100% be reading the next book.
This is a book about sex slavery. Everything is nonconsensual even when it’s “consensual.” There’s some Stockholm syndrome going on here and the level of mindfuckery is intense. You can’t possibly hate the person you should hate because this author makes you feel like he has no other option. He’s actually a hero and he’s absolutely torn by his actions. I felt bad for a rapist. That’s some good storytelling. I also felt uncomfortable for a lot of this book and hated how much I liked it. And I really liked it at times.
I wavered between 3 and 4 stars for pretty much one reason: the “consensual” sex bothered me. It was incredibly tame in comparison to everything else going on, but it just felt wrong for the situation. We’ve got two emotionally fragile MCs and that’s the kind of sex the author chooses to have them connect? I didn’t like it. I actually enjoyed the sex between Carter and Sir better, which really fucked with my head. I felt like Carter needed something else, especially after his evening with Henley. And Nathan felt like an abusive monster but does that to Carter? Nah. Not feeling it. Honestly, it was more the language used beforehand than the actual act and it gave me anxiety anticipating what would happen. Couldn’t actually imagine Carter being okay with it. If it was just that one scene I probably could have let it go and given 4 stars, but it happened...kind of...near the end and reminded me how much that dynamic bothered me.
That being said, I could really see how this could be a 4 star book for a lot of people. It was fascinating. I had trouble putting it down and I really wanted to know where it was going. How is this going to be a trilogy? I’m so stressed thinking about that. How can our MCs possibly have a happy ending?! I will 100% be reading the next book.
January 28, 2025
The most heart breaking, gut wrenching, soul crushing 6⭐️ book I have ever read.
If Hunting Adeline was on steroids and then make it an MM version.
I don’t even know where to begin. Right off the bat, this book takes off with Carter being kidnapped. The author just jumps right into it— which is one of the reasons it was so hard for me to put this down. Every chapter, every page, every paragraph.. just kept me coming back to see what happened next. I quite literally do not think I have ever read as fast as I did. You constantly feel like you’re on the climax in the book, subtly waiting for the plot to drop and for you to finally relax and take a breath. But, it never happens. You just keep reading trying to pray that Carter has seen the worse (but he doesn’t).
This book was so good that I didn’t even mind the 3rd person narration (which I usually try very hard to avoid). Actually the complete opposite. The author does an excellent job of balancing writing from the 3rd person POV but also gives us 1st person dialogue through character-to-character interaction. It’s the perfect balance, and I think helps tell the story in a more engaging and emotional way.
I will say… it was very hard for me to love Nathan. I know that he was forced to do this, and most of it was out of his hand.. but I still could not find it in me to emphasize with that. When Carter and Nathan started developing feelings for each other (IK Stockholm Syndrome, but trust me and just read the book), I was so mad. I wanted my anger to be reflected back into Carter, but it never was. I just can’t find it in me right now to forgive Nathan and I’m really hoping that the other two books will change my mind on that.
I will say, I was doing really well holding the tears back for about 70% of the book. Yes, I was cringing, I was sad, and my heart was breaking— but I still had not cried. Except when Casey gets dragged back into the plot. When he and Carter reunite… and everything goes down.. I. BROKE. Hearing how Casey was being gang-graped and then Nathan being forced to punish Carter. I just couldn’t read after that. I was crying throughout the whole scene, and then I had to stop reading for a second and digest what had just happened.
Overall, I’m just so angry on Carters behalf that he was not told the truth about Nathan. I know the second book is all about the after of Carter finding out the truth, and I am soooo excited to read that! I can’t wait to finish off the series and see what happens. And, I am especially excited to read Casey and Jake’s book— Casey already holds a big place in my heart and I just know that Jake will be good to him.
If Hunting Adeline was on steroids and then make it an MM version.
I don’t even know where to begin. Right off the bat, this book takes off with Carter being kidnapped. The author just jumps right into it— which is one of the reasons it was so hard for me to put this down. Every chapter, every page, every paragraph.. just kept me coming back to see what happened next. I quite literally do not think I have ever read as fast as I did. You constantly feel like you’re on the climax in the book, subtly waiting for the plot to drop and for you to finally relax and take a breath. But, it never happens. You just keep reading trying to pray that Carter has seen the worse (but he doesn’t).
This book was so good that I didn’t even mind the 3rd person narration (which I usually try very hard to avoid). Actually the complete opposite. The author does an excellent job of balancing writing from the 3rd person POV but also gives us 1st person dialogue through character-to-character interaction. It’s the perfect balance, and I think helps tell the story in a more engaging and emotional way.
I will say… it was very hard for me to love Nathan. I know that he was forced to do this, and most of it was out of his hand.. but I still could not find it in me to emphasize with that. When Carter and Nathan started developing feelings for each other (IK Stockholm Syndrome, but trust me and just read the book), I was so mad. I wanted my anger to be reflected back into Carter, but it never was. I just can’t find it in me right now to forgive Nathan and I’m really hoping that the other two books will change my mind on that.
I will say, I was doing really well holding the tears back for about 70% of the book. Yes, I was cringing, I was sad, and my heart was breaking— but I still had not cried. Except when Casey gets dragged back into the plot. When he and Carter reunite… and everything goes down.. I. BROKE. Hearing how Casey was being gang-graped and then Nathan being forced to punish Carter. I just couldn’t read after that. I was crying throughout the whole scene, and then I had to stop reading for a second and digest what had just happened.
Overall, I’m just so angry on Carters behalf that he was not told the truth about Nathan. I know the second book is all about the after of Carter finding out the truth, and I am soooo excited to read that! I can’t wait to finish off the series and see what happens. And, I am especially excited to read Casey and Jake’s book— Casey already holds a big place in my heart and I just know that Jake will be good to him.
March 13, 2025
Oh. My. STARS. I read this book sort of on a whim - I'd seen a few friends reading it, and I was really curious because I plan on meeting T. J. Hamel at Romance in Toronto. I'm not much of a dark romance reader, and I was warned multiple times that this book is REALLY dark. THAT SAID, I was so tempted to give it a try after I saw people praising the writing, storyline, and binging the entire series in a week. Y'all, I completely surprised myself - I am OBSESSED. YES, it's as dark as they say. YES, it's very hard to read sometimes - SO many tears, I cried AT LEAST once every chapter. But despite all that, the story so compelling, and I was just LIVING for those small moments of beauty amongst all the ugliness and pain. It's SO worth reading, and I am absolutely going to be binging the series now.
These Monstrous Deeds is basically about an undercover operation to break apart a human trafficking organization. When Carter, the brother of one of the leaders of this operation is discovered, he's kidnapped and sold to Nathan Roarke, the leader of this organization. Nathan seems like an absolute monster - everyone is afraid of him. And though he can be kind to Carter, much kinder than anyone else he's surrounded by, he still treats him like he's less than human most of the time. Carter struggles not to break mentally and physically, but what ultimately bothers him the most is that he finds himself falling for Nathan, despite what he puts him through. And Nathan is falling for him too - but he has a secret. Nathan is in deep cover for the organization trying to save everyone - and the only thing that might bring everything down is if he tears off his mask and reveals everything to Carter.
Y'all, there is a LOT of noncon in this book, all kinds of literal torture. It's VERY hard to read. The book is dual POV, so we get to read about what's going on in both Carter AND Nathan's heads. The way TJ writes about the things both characters are going through is SO well done. The way Carter is trying to keep his humanity and justify his feelings for Nathan. The way Nathan is SO tortured and conflicted about what he has to do with Carter in order to save him. It could be just gratuitous s3x and violence, but everything is analyzed and rationalized in such an introspective way.
PLEASE check TWs before reading this book - it's A LOT, and I get that. If you CAN read the subject matter in this book, however, you ABSOLUTELY should. I read this book in less than 24 hours, and I immediately started the second one because I NEEDED to know what happened. Underrated and incredible read!
These Monstrous Deeds is basically about an undercover operation to break apart a human trafficking organization. When Carter, the brother of one of the leaders of this operation is discovered, he's kidnapped and sold to Nathan Roarke, the leader of this organization. Nathan seems like an absolute monster - everyone is afraid of him. And though he can be kind to Carter, much kinder than anyone else he's surrounded by, he still treats him like he's less than human most of the time. Carter struggles not to break mentally and physically, but what ultimately bothers him the most is that he finds himself falling for Nathan, despite what he puts him through. And Nathan is falling for him too - but he has a secret. Nathan is in deep cover for the organization trying to save everyone - and the only thing that might bring everything down is if he tears off his mask and reveals everything to Carter.
Y'all, there is a LOT of noncon in this book, all kinds of literal torture. It's VERY hard to read. The book is dual POV, so we get to read about what's going on in both Carter AND Nathan's heads. The way TJ writes about the things both characters are going through is SO well done. The way Carter is trying to keep his humanity and justify his feelings for Nathan. The way Nathan is SO tortured and conflicted about what he has to do with Carter in order to save him. It could be just gratuitous s3x and violence, but everything is analyzed and rationalized in such an introspective way.
PLEASE check TWs before reading this book - it's A LOT, and I get that. If you CAN read the subject matter in this book, however, you ABSOLUTELY should. I read this book in less than 24 hours, and I immediately started the second one because I NEEDED to know what happened. Underrated and incredible read!
July 9, 2023
Phew, dark, super dark, heartbreaking trauma, self-loathing, intense topics, deplorable lack of morality, reads more like erotica than a romance novel so be ready for anything, even non-con. This story jumps right into the sad, tragic story of the underground pleasure slave business as well as the harsh realities and sacrifice of undercover work. Emotionally charged as we see the main characters struggle with their roles in the saga, we’re in on the layers to the plot right from the start, which actually makes it more heartbreaking as we see certain actions and decision play out. Really well written, not for those with easily bruised souls.
With all dark literature, mind the trigger warnings as there are some on-page items that some may need to be forewarned about. Fans of “The Kidnapping of Roan Sinclair” will enjoy this book as it has a similar vibe.
I honestly struggle with books like this, I went in blind and had no idea how brutal this book was. I know we often need a character to be “low” so we can get to that gloriously lovely “high”, but oomph, this is beyond low and at the hands of the guy who will likely be the love interest later on? Yikes. Like I said, the struggle is real. Ultimately, this book grabbed my attention from page one and now I need to see what happens, I need to see how we get out of this situation, how we handle the healing, will there be forgiveness and how can there possibly be anything left of Nathan/Travis and Carter when all is said and done.
With all dark literature, mind the trigger warnings as there are some on-page items that some may need to be forewarned about. Fans of “The Kidnapping of Roan Sinclair” will enjoy this book as it has a similar vibe.
I honestly struggle with books like this, I went in blind and had no idea how brutal this book was. I know we often need a character to be “low” so we can get to that gloriously lovely “high”, but oomph, this is beyond low and at the hands of the guy who will likely be the love interest later on? Yikes. Like I said, the struggle is real. Ultimately, this book grabbed my attention from page one and now I need to see what happens, I need to see how we get out of this situation, how we handle the healing, will there be forgiveness and how can there possibly be anything left of Nathan/Travis and Carter when all is said and done.
May 25, 2023
3.75 stars
April 29, 2025
Well, f*ck. 😭
November 29, 2021
I don't know who my heart breaks for more, the innocent boy getting raped and beaten just for the fact that he had familial ties to someone or the man raping and beating the only person he's ever loved just to save everyone else.
I kinda understood where Carter was coming from in the end there though. I mean, everyone else only ever broke their slaves' bodies but Nathan, while he didn't know it nor intending to was breaking Carter's mind too.
Wow does this book give a whole new meaning to that phrase. I wish I could drink this book away and out of memory.
“Heroes don’t rape the boys they love.”
I kinda understood where Carter was coming from in the end there though. I mean, everyone else only ever broke their slaves' bodies but Nathan, while he didn't know it nor intending to was breaking Carter's mind too.
"Without you I am nothing."
Wow does this book give a whole new meaning to that phrase. I wish I could drink this book away and out of memory.
October 7, 2024
I don’t know if I’ll ever write a review for this
July 29, 2021
This book started out with some great potential. Gritty Wrongness with a morally conflicted main character? Sign me up.
Unfortunately, the book lost itself along the way. I felt like it stalled out in the Master/slave phase for far too long, while neglecting any background plot. The set up of having Nate undercover, trying to bring down the whole trafficking ring is such a good plot, and I would have liked to see more of that intertwined with the Carter scenes. Instead, it felt like they were bookends - the book starts with the traffickers because Carter needs to get bought, and then ends with the next little bit of forward plot movement, with only a little segment (Henley) in the middle. The Master/slave parts didn't really advance much either - it felt repetitive over time. I also thought it was interesting how Nate tries to be kind to Carter in private but then that kind of just ends up being an extra mindfuck for him.
I can get behind Carter and Stockholm syndrome love, but I have no idea why Nate thinks he's in love with Carter. The best I can do is that he sees Carter as like a life raft/wholesome/keeps him out of the darkness etc. (That was never indicated in the book, it's just my thought.)
I also felt that Nate went a bit into TSTL territory over Carter. He's been undercover for like eight years, and then he pretty much loses his head and acts like a total dipshit making everyone suspicious immediately. I get that now he actually has to participate, but...dude, you're gonna get everyone killed with this. I think it would have been better if he'd held it together more in public and then kept his freak-outs behind doors, because I feel like he's just totally sinking his whole op, and it made the story less enjoyable to me. Unless that becomes a plot point later I suppose...
The ending...meh. Not really a cliffhanger. I don't know if I'll keep going, I hadn't realized it was the first in a series and was hoping to see it all come together rather than...not.
Overall, potential but lost in the weeds.
I also have to note: the Harry Potter analogy thing? My skeleton tried to escape my body.
Carter: lets watch Harry Potter! :):)
Nate: i never seen harry potter and have failed to pick up on any references to it ever >:
---
Nate: wow snape is sure an obvious bad guy look at him looking all Bad Guy
Carter: just because he looks like a bad guy doesnt mean he is :) :);)
pleasseeeeee no
to abuse the metaphor, this makes Carter as Harry, Nate as Snape, and Maison as Dumbledore and therefore Nate will kill Maison. it's only facts, i don't make the rules
Unfortunately, the book lost itself along the way. I felt like it stalled out in the Master/slave phase for far too long, while neglecting any background plot. The set up of having Nate undercover, trying to bring down the whole trafficking ring is such a good plot, and I would have liked to see more of that intertwined with the Carter scenes. Instead, it felt like they were bookends - the book starts with the traffickers because Carter needs to get bought, and then ends with the next little bit of forward plot movement, with only a little segment (Henley) in the middle. The Master/slave parts didn't really advance much either - it felt repetitive over time. I also thought it was interesting how Nate tries to be kind to Carter in private but then that kind of just ends up being an extra mindfuck for him.
I can get behind Carter and Stockholm syndrome love, but I have no idea why Nate thinks he's in love with Carter. The best I can do is that he sees Carter as like a life raft/wholesome/keeps him out of the darkness etc. (That was never indicated in the book, it's just my thought.)
I also felt that Nate went a bit into TSTL territory over Carter. He's been undercover for like eight years, and then he pretty much loses his head and acts like a total dipshit making everyone suspicious immediately. I get that now he actually has to participate, but...dude, you're gonna get everyone killed with this. I think it would have been better if he'd held it together more in public and then kept his freak-outs behind doors, because I feel like he's just totally sinking his whole op, and it made the story less enjoyable to me. Unless that becomes a plot point later I suppose...
The ending...meh. Not really a cliffhanger. I don't know if I'll keep going, I hadn't realized it was the first in a series and was hoping to see it all come together rather than...not.
Overall, potential but lost in the weeds.
I also have to note: the Harry Potter analogy thing? My skeleton tried to escape my body.
Carter: lets watch Harry Potter! :):)
Nate: i never seen harry potter and have failed to pick up on any references to it ever >:
---
Nate: wow snape is sure an obvious bad guy look at him looking all Bad Guy
Carter: just because he looks like a bad guy doesnt mean he is :) :);)
pleasseeeeee no
to abuse the metaphor, this makes Carter as Harry, Nate as Snape, and Maison as Dumbledore and therefore Nate will kill Maison. it's only facts, i don't make the rules
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