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330 pages, Kindle Edition
First published August 25, 2023
This does not read like a why choose/polyamory book; this book reads like a MM book between Erik and Ludo with Johnny and Juniper being jammed in there at last minute. The third MMC doesn't even come into the story until 33% in. If Ludo never met Erik then Juniper would have stayed pining for him, Erik was the crappy glue to this whole thing. The fact that Ludo was this giant player that slept with every girl but Junie, was magically ready to commit once he met Erik really pissed me off. None of these men are pursuing Juniper or making her their number one. They're afraid to ruin their friendships and think they're not good enough for her and you know? They're right. I never feel like they love Juniper; they just like what she does for them.
The plot of Erik and Junie fake dating made no sense to me and just made me mad. Like Johnny says, Juniper gets nothing out of this arrangement. You don't have to be in a relationship to not date. But what pissed me off most was a part around 70%, Johnny reveals that Juniper got body shamed and bullied at a party in high school and paired with Ludo telling everyone she was off limits caused guys to reject her, leading her to believe she was undesirable. Meanwhile, Ludo got to hook up with everyone and none of the guys she hung out with and loved her helped.
Here is a list of quotes that really made me upset
"I was so desperate for someone to want me that I ruined things"
When she'd broken her leg in senior year, ruining her chances to be scouted, deep down inside I was selfishly happy about it. It meant she could come with me wherever I went. I'd always needed Bug more than she needed me. I still did.
"...it kind of feels like I'm poaching him from my best friend. Like I'm somehow taking a shortcut into something more with Ludo after standing on the sidelines for so fucking long, and now I'm forcing myself into their relationship."
I knew for an unfortanate fact that this wasn't the first time they'd fucked in the same room. There had been the Bayliss twins in senior year. I was pretty sure they'd fucked most of Marianne's friend group too, just like this.