My Brother's Shadow

by Tom Avery

Fans of David Almond’s Skellig and Patrick Ness’s A Monster Calls will embrace this deeply affecting middle grade novel in which a girl suffering from terrible grief befriends a mysterious wild boy.

When I saw him that first time I screamed—a small and silent scream, all inside, in my gut. Eleven-year-old Kaia, who has felt isolated since her older brother committed suicide more than a year before, befriends a wild boy who mysteriously appears at her London school. Though the boy is mute and can only communicate with a flash of his gray eyes, he might be the friend Kaia needs to bring her through her grief.

Here’s a fascinating story, which offers a fresh and completely original portrayal of loss and renewal.

Genres: Middle Grade, Contemporary, Young Adult, Fiction, Realistic Fiction, Childrens, Mental Health

176 pages, Hardcover

First published January 2, 2014

Reviews

[Iman Danial Hakim · Rating 5 out of 5]

Kematian tidak pernah mudah untuk sesiapa.

Untuk dewasa. Untuk kanak-kanak.

Kehilangan bagi setiap orang, maksudnya boleh berbeza-beza.

Dan seiring masa, kita belajar untuk menerima.

"Nama saya Kaia. Saya ada abang paling best di dunia. Satu hari, abang saya mati."

:')

Kita dibawa untuk ikut naratif kanak² 11 tahun. Bahagia & sangat bangga dengan abang kesayangannya

Sekelip mata, kebahagiaan Kaia diragut.

Bagaimana seorang kanak² belajar berdamai dengan luka: realiti pahit— abang kesayangannya sudah tiada.

Benar kanak² masih kurang kosa kata.

Ada kesedihan maha berat tergumpal di dada, tetapi Kaia tidak tahu cara mengungkapkannya.

Lalu dia terperangkap. Membeku dalam momen yang berulang.

Kaia tidak tahu, atau lebih tepat: dia tak mahu melepaskan.

Saya gemar membaca cerita sebegini.

Tentang kematian, kehilangan, dan cara berdamai dengannya.

Kenangan bukanlah sesuatu yang linear. Ia tidak akan hilang seiring waktu.

Sifatnya berombak. Ada masa kita dihambat kepedihan yang terlalu. Ada waktu, kita baik² sahaja.

Tetapi, jika ada yang mengingatkan kita pada kepedihan itu, we are back to square to one.

Maka seperti di awal² tulisan ini.

Untuk dewasa. Untuk kanak-kanak.

Kehilangan bagi setiap orang, maksudnya boleh berbeza-beza.

Dan seiring masa, kita hanya mampu belajar— untuk menerima.

Dan sebagai abang sulung, saya termenung sendiri.

Waktu saya tiada nanti, semoga mereka yang saya tinggalkan akan baik² sahaja.

Biarlah saya sentiasa dikenang & selalu di dalam doa mereka.

[Kimberly · Rating 4 out of 5]

Kaia is frozen in time since her brother's death. She moves through life in a static emptiness. Her mum is barely there too. Until the day a new boy comes to school. He's wild and untamed, he's a good listener and doesn't care what the other kids think. And he's the friend Kaia needs.

Well written, My Brother's Shadow is a sad tale of a young girl moving through grief and isolation after a traumatic event in her life. Kaia is so well drawn, she is almost sitting next to you, telling you her story of how she meets the mysterious boy, her memories of her family "before" and how this friend is helping her cope with her new world.
I liked the delicate and sparse language. Kaia's voice is clear and her pain is palpable, bringing the reader in immediately. We want to know more about this boy, about Kaia, about her brother and what happened.
At the same time, you're truly frightened to find out.

The story touches upon sensitive topics, but it's important to understand that the real story is about Kaia and how this young girl can handle such an emotional experience. How this event unwinds her mother and how Kaia grows and processes her own feelings differently. Avery does a wonderful job illustrating the heartbreak that follows such events and the hope that has to fight extra hard to be seen.

Overall, I think readers will enjoy the book, in all of it's heaviness and sadness. It's about coming out, moving on, and grabbing a friend's hand.

[Terry Costantini · Rating 4 out of 5]

I have now read this book several times, and I can say that although it is not my preferred genre, it is an incredibly well written young adult novel.
I enjoy the voice of Kaia, the main character, and I enjoyed learning about her tragedy, and her healing. The prose is interesting and is just vague enough to inspire inference, but not so vague that it is cryptic. If you enjoy living through the world of interesting characters, you will really love this.

[Andrea Athos · Rating 5 out of 5]

Selten hat mich ein so dünnes Büchlein so mitgenommen und berührt. Unbedingt lesen! ❤

[Linda Lipko · Rating 5 out of 5]

Quite simply, a stunning book of a young girl alone, as her mother cannot help Kaia as alons, she grieves the loss of her brother.

She found him, now she must find the way out of the powerful hold of grief. Previously, a honor student, now she slips rapidly into sadness that cannot allow her to find a way back.

A boy appears outside the school window. When he arrives inside, he jumps on the desks, howls like a wild animal and refuses to behave. He sticks by Kaia, never saying words, simply sitting by her.

The mother who cannot stop drinking her way through the sadness cannot help her, but this wild boy seems to take her mind off the tragic loss.

This is a wonderful tale of loss and grief and trying as best as possible to climb out of the deep well of sadness.

Excellent.

Five Stars!

[Alyiah · Rating 3 out of 5]

I personally enjoyed this book, I liked it because it has voice. Of course there are many other reasons why I like this book, but voice is one of the strongest. It doesn't sound like a male author, it sounds like the main character, who happens to be a little girl. The book has quite a few parts in which sensitive people might have to watch out for. The girl, Kaia, has a unique feel to her. The way this is written, makes her seem almost real. She has a distinct personality, in which most children wouldn't have. I like the way the story plays with your mind, how it does the opposite of what you would expect. Very well written!

[Asaviel · Rating 5 out of 5]

"Schneide tief in einen Baum, und beim Wachsen wächst seine Narbe mit. Sie heilt nicht. Sie verschwindet nicht. Sie wird groß wie der Baum." (Seite 48)

Es gibt Bücher, viel zu viele Bücher, die viel weniger Aufmerksamkeit geschenkt bekommen als sie verdient haben. Man wird ihnen nicht gerecht, denn sie gehen in der Masse unter. Dieses kleine Büchlein mit gerade einmal 150 Seiten gehört dazu. Es bekommt viel zu wenig Aufmerksamkeit und zumindest ein kleines bisschen möchte ich das ändern.
Denn ich habe selten ein Buch erlebt, in dem auf so wenig Seiten so viel Gefühl vermittelt wurde. Im Mittelpunkt des Romans steht Kaia, die vor Beginn der Handlung ihren Bruder tot in seinem Zimmer gefunden hat und seitdem nicht nur mit dem Verlust des geliebten Menschen zu kämpfen hat, sondern auch mit allen Widrigkeiten, die das Leben infolgedessen in ihren Weg gelegt hat. Ihre Mutter ist scheinbar an dem Tod zerbrochen und in der Schule hat Kaia den Anschluss zu ihren Freundinnen längst verloren.
Ihre Geschichte wird sehr intensiv aus der Ich-Perspektive erzählt und so nimmt der Leser direkt an jedem ihrer Gedankengänge teil. Das ist besonders, denn sie denkt viel, sie denkt viel über Dinge nach, die in ihrem Alter nicht selbstverständlich sind.
Der wilde, stumme Junge, der auftaucht und zu Kaias Freund wird hat eine einzigartige Stellung. Er spricht nicht, seine Handlungen wirken konfus und trotzdem ist über weite Teile er es, der Kaia weiterhilft. Dabei kann er nicht charakterisiert werden.

"Ich bin festgefroren in der Vergangenheit. Festgefroren seit einem Tag, den ich niemals vergessen werde. Erstarrt. Erstarrt. Erstarrt." (Seite 11)

Ganz im Gegensatz zu Kaia. Ihr Charaktere und ihre Verhaltensweisen sind fein gezeichnet und in sich vollkommen schlüssig. Aus ihrer sehr reflektierten Art ergeben sich für sie zehn "Lebensregeln", die sich jeder Leser auch zu Herzen nehmen kann und von denen sich jeder etwas persönlich mitnehmen kann, was sein Leben bereichert.
Es steckt so viel mehr hinter dieser Geschichte als nur der Umgang mit dem Verlust. Familie, Schule und insbesondere Freundschaften sind die Themenfelder, an die man ganz nah herangeführt wird. Man muss sich darauf einlassen, auf diese Geschichte und auch auf den Stil der Geschichte, man muss sich berühren lassen, aber dann kann man etwas Besonderes erleben.

"Tränen sind sonderbar. Sonderbar, weil es Tränen der Trauer und Tränen der Freude gibt, aber sie kommen immer, wenn die Welt mehr ist, als man aushalten kann, wenn die Gefühle überfließen, wenn unsere Freude und unser Leid irgendwo ein Leck haben wie ein Boot." (Seite 95)

Dabei muss der Leser dann aber am Ende auch akzeptieren, dass eine Frage, die bei jedem unweigerlich beim Lesen aufgeworfen wird, nicht abschließend geklärt wird, sondern dass hier Spielraum für die eigenen Gedanken bleibt.
Weder diesen Punkt noch dass die Nebencharaktere - das heißt die Klassenkameraden Kaias - stereotyp bleiben, sehe ich als Manko der Geschichte. Auf dieser geringen Seitenzahl und mit dieser hohen Intensität ist es nicht vorstellbar mehr als ein oder maximal zwei Charaktere genau und detailliert auszuführen.
Das Ende macht Mut - so viel sei hier vorweggenommen und es lässt den Leser zwar mit einem Herz zurück, das voller Gefühle ist und vielleicht auch mit Tränen in den Augen, aber es ist kein Ende, das verzweifeln lässt oder ähnliches.

Fazit: Ein Buch, dem die Leserwelt bisher viel zu wenig Aufmerksamkeit geschenkt hat und für das man sich einfach mal Zeit nehmen sollte. Gelesen sind die 150 Seiten schnell, aber danach wirkt es weiter und es empfiehlt sich unbedingt der Geschichte danach etwas Zeit zu geben zu wirken und sie sacken zu lassen. Unglaublich berührend und so viel Gefühl, das beim Lesen das Herz überzufließen droht.

[Sarah Kallus · Rating 3 out of 5]

Kaias verliert ihren Bruder Moses auf tragische Weise und fortan ist in ihrem Leben nichts mehr, wie es war. Ihre Mutter und sie reden nicht mehr und sie verliert ihre Freundinnen in der Schule, fühlt sich einsam und auf sich alleine gestellt. Die meisten nennen sie Freak und verspotten sie, doch keiner denkt darüber nach, wie es in Kaia aussieht. Doch eines Tages kommt ein neuer Junge an die Schule und Kaia freundet sich mit ihm an. Er ist anders als all die anderen, ist wild und redet nicht, aber er hört zu. Und das ist genau das, was Kaia gerade braucht.
Eine wunderbare Geschichte über Freundschaft, das Leben und die Neuanfänge, die man immer wieder machen kann, egal wie tief man vorher gefallen ist.

Dieses Buch hat mehr als Tiefe als die meisten Erwachsenenromane, wo man diesen Anspruch stellen würde. Anhand der kleinen Seitenzahl und dem Klappentext habe ich zuerst ein schlichtes Kinder- und Jugendbuch erwartet, stattdessen habe ich etwas Wundervolles bekommen, was mich wirklich berührt hat. Kaia ist ein tolles Mädchen, das man sogleich auf den ersten Seiten fest in Herz schließt und am liebsten nicht mehr loslassen möchte. Sie ist so jung und macht schon so verdammt viel durch und an manchen Stellen zweifelte ich wirklich an der Menschlichkeit mancher Charaktere in diesem Buch. Es ist unfassbar, wie grausam Kinder sein können und genauso unfassbar, wie unsensibel manche Lehrer damit umgehen, wenn so junge Menschen ein Familienmitglied verlieren. Gerade Kinder kommen mit diesen Bildern, mit denen Kaia leben muss, nicht wirklich klar und man sollte ihnen alle Zeit der Welt geben, dies ordentlich zu verarbeiten.
Dieses Buch ist in jeder Linie wertvoll zu lesen und das unbedingt in jedem Alter. In diesen wenigen Seiten steckt so viel, das ich so schnell nicht wieder vergessen werde. Für mich ein Beweis, dass ich auch dem Beltz & Gelberg Verlag zukünftig mehr Aufmerksamkeit schenken werde. Die Bücher haben hohen Wert und da soll mal noch ein Leser behaupten, dass Bücher unter 300 Seiten kein Buch wären. Das hier ist mehr Buch als viele andere mit fünfhundert Seiten, die am Ende rein gar nichts auszudrücken wussten. Bitte gebt diesem Werk eine Chance. Es hat es absolut verdient!

[Alex H]

This book was really interesting. The voice was amazing, I thought that it really was a young girl speaking about her life. I thought the story was a bit thin, and could have used a little more detail. the ending was very satisfying. The end will make you swell up with tears, I promise. It was well thought and made my teacher cry as he read it. Kaia is an excellent character and I thought that all this was real. The book makes you really think about what is happening, doesn't it? One wish I have for this book is that it needed to be more of a gradual ending. I know that it was a good ending but it kind of happened abruptly

[Leselurch · Rating 5 out of 5]

*Worum geht's?*
Kaia ist erstarrt. Seit ihr Bruder gestorben ist, ist sie festgefroren. Festgefroren in der Vergangenheit, die sie niemals vergessen wird. Weder ihre Freunde noch ihre Mutter, die ihre eigenen Sorgen durch Alkohol zu verdrängen versucht, können Kaia helfen. Aber dann kommt plötzlich ein wilder Junge an Kaias Schule. Er redet nicht, ist durch und durch unbezähmbar und niemand weiß, woher er kommt – und doch ist er der Einzige, der Kaia zu verstehen scheinen. Durch ihn löst sich Kaias Starre. Durch ihn fasst sie den Mut, sich wieder dem Leben zu stellen. Eine Freundschaft voller lauter Fragen beginnt, auf die es nur stille Antworten zu geben scheint.

*Meine Meinung:*
Man muss genau hinschauen, damit man sie nicht übersieht: die kleinen, feinen Büchlein, die sich bescheiden im Hintergrund halten. Die sich in den Buchhandlungen schüchtern zwischen den dicken Schmökern verstecken. Die nicht mit den ganz Großen um Platzierungen auf Bestsellerlisten kämpfen wollen. Sie haben wunderschöne Geschichten zu erzählen, die berühren und bewegen, nachdenklich stimmen und im Kopf bleiben. Aber sie sind zurückhaltend, scheu, leise. Sie kommen nicht auf dich zu, umgarnen dich nicht mit Witz und Charme, die beste Unterhaltung versprechen. Sie wollen dir von sich erzählen, dir allein eine Geschichte zuflüstern, die du nicht mehr vergessen wirst. Aber es liegt an dir, sie zu entdecken.

Tom Averys Debüt „Der Schatten meines Bruders“ ist ein solches Buch. Es ist ein zierlicher Roman, den man mit seinen knapp 150 Seiten in einer Buchhandlung schnell einmal übersehen kann. Dabei steckt auf den wenigen Seiten eine Geschichte, die viel mehr zu bieten hat als so mancher Bestseller. Es ist ein kleines Meisterwerk, das es verdient hat, beachtet und gelesen zu werden. „Der Schatten meines Bruder“ erzählt von der Schwere, die einen überfällt, wenn man einen geliebten Menschen verliert. Von der Trauer, die einen erstarren und verrückt werden lässt. Aber es erzählt zugleich auch von dem Mut, etwas Neues anzufangen. Den Verlust nicht zu vergessen, aber hinter sich zu lassen. Wieder zu lächeln und zu leben.

„Der Schatten meines Bruders“ erzählt die Geschichte von dem jungen Mädchen Kaia – oder vielmehr: Die Geschichte wird von ihr niedergeschrieben. In dem Roman bekommt man Kaias Aufzeichnungen zu lesen, die sie für sich selbst aufgeschrieben hat. Auf intensive und eindringliche Art und Weise nimmt man an Kaias Leben teil, das man seit des Todes ihres Bruders schon gar nicht mehr als Leben bezeichnen kann. Sie hat all ihre Freunde verloren, findet in der Schule keinen Anschluss mehr und ihre Mutter ertränkt ihre eigenen Sorgen mit Alkohol. Als ein seltsamer Junge an Kaias Schule kommt, ändert sich alles, ganz plötzlich und schleichend zugleich.

Der mysteriöse Junge ist wild und stumm. Er redet nicht, hört dafür aber ganz genau zu, und nimmt die Welt durch seine wilden Augen ganz anders wahr. Auf stille Art werden er und Kaia zu Freunden, besten Freunden, und durch ihn beginnt das Mädchen langsam, aber sicher wieder zu leben. „Der Schatten meines Bruders“ zeigt, wie wichtig Freundschaft ist und was sie bewirken kann. Ihn und Kaia verbindet eine ganz besondere, innige Beziehung, die man nur schwer beschreiben kann. Man muss sie lesen, selbst erleben, um verstehen zu können, warum und wieso ausgerechnet ein wilder Junge und ein festgefrorenes Mädchen ein unbezwingbares Duo abgeben, das einen tief in der Seele berührt.

„Der Schatten meines Bruders“ behandelt mit Themen wie dem Tod, der Trauer und der Flucht in eine Sucht ohnehin sehr schwerwiegende und schwierige Aspekte. Tom Avery geht jedoch noch einen Schritt weiter und stellt diese auf eine unverblümte, erschreckend realistische und zugleich tief bewegende Weise dar, die einem eine Gänsehaut beschert. Auch als erwachsene Leserin, die nicht mehr in die angesprochene Leserschaft von 12-15 Jahren passt (obwohl ich an dieser Stelle ausdrücklich betonen möchte, dass „Der Schatten meines Bruders“ alles andere als bloß ein Jugendbuch ist und keinesfalls an Altersgrenzen gebunden ist!), war ich von einigen expliziten Szenen sehr geschockt. Tom Avery erzählt die Geschichte durch die Augen eines jungen Mädchens, authentisch, realitätsnah und glaubhaft, aber eben auch knallhart. „Der Schatten meines Bruders“ ist ein Buch, das nicht nur Jugendliche ein wenig an ihre Grenzen treibt. Sanfte Gemüter sollten Averys Roman daher vielleicht nicht alleine lesen.

Tom Avery konzentriert sich in seinem Roman auf das, was wirklich zählt: die Momente, in denen die Trauer am größten ist, und jene, in denen sich alles ändert. Avery holt nicht weit aus und erzählt in „Der Schatten meines Bruders“ nicht die komplette Lebensgeschichte seiner Protagonistin Kaia. Man darf sie nur für eine kurze Zeit durch ihr Leben begleiten und nimmt nur an den wichtigsten Sequenzen teil. Viele Dinge, wie etwa ihre früheres Leben oder das ihres Bruders, werden nur angeschnitten und nicht ausführlich behandelt. Avery lässt seine Leser über viele Fakten und Geschehnisse im Unklaren, er lässt viele Fragen unbeantwortet. Was einen in vielen Büchern tatsächlich nervt, ist in „Der Schatten meines Bruders“ allerdings genau richtig. Alles andere hätte gar nicht in das Buch gepasst und vom Eigentlichen abgelenkt: Von dem, worauf es ankommt.

Tom Avery unterteilt Kaias Geschichte nicht in klassisch durchnummerierte Kapitel, sondern in 10 bewusste gesetzte Abschnitte, die sowohl Fortschritte als auch Rückschritte für das Mädchen bedeuten können. Jeder dieser Abschnitte wird durch eine von Kaias Lebensregeln („6. Lebensregel: Pass gut aus – du könntest etwas verpassen“, S. 85) eingeleitet, die sich mitsamt ihrer Bedeutung in das eigene Gedächtnis brennen. Die Worte, die Avery für Kaia gewählt hat, erscheinen im ersten Moment vielleicht gar nicht so bedeutsam, doch je intensiver man in die Welt des verletzten Mädchens abtaucht, desto deutlicher und schwerer lastet jedes einzelne von ihnen auf dem eigenen Herzen – und desto prägender ist das, was nach der letzten Seite mit einem selbst geschieht.

*Fazit:*
„Der Schatten meines Bruders“ von Tom Avery ist ein kleines Meisterwerk, das jeder gelesen haben sollte. Es ist eine berührende und bewegende Geschichte über den Tod und die Trauer, aber auch über den Mut, etwas hinter sich zu lassen und wieder zu leben. Kaia und der wilde, stumme Junge sind ein Duo, das einen tief im Herzen, aber auch im Kopf bewegt. Tom Averys Debüt ist unbeschreiblich traurig und schön zugleich, ein Buch, über das man viel reden, dem man aber mit keinem Wort gerecht werden kann. Für mich ein absolutes Must-Read! Für „Der Schatten meines Bruders“ vergebe ich 5 Lurche.

[Maddy · Rating 4 out of 5]

I enjoyed the book a lot, but I didn't like how the ending ended. It should have ended more happily because most of the book has more sad parts then happy, and I prefer the more happy books. I mean, it's good to have some sad parts, but not a lot.
I also liked how the author voiced the book, it really suited a kid`s life like Kaia`s.
Out of the beginning, middle and end, my favourite was the middle because that's when things started to come together, and not stay the same. Things also started getting more happier, which is what I liked the most. Her friends started becoming her friends again, her mother was becoming more successful, and so on.

[Dighlan B · Rating 3 out of 5]

I enjoyed reading this book.
It isn't a book I would typically read, but it was definitely nice to try something new. I really liked how some people could relate to the main character, Kaia, in this book. Frozen in her own personal memories, and reminding everyone how slow and difficult the thawing process is. I found there were very few chapters in the book where something wasn't happening, and it can definitely make you feel some emotions.
Though I didn't love it, I definitely enjoyed it and I know that there are some people that will definitely love this book.

[Emilia · Rating 3 out of 5]

3.5 stars

The writing in this book is exceptional. Unfortunately, I didn't enjoy the story. This novel is a dark tale about overcoming grief after the suicide of the main character's brother.

My Brother's Shadow is a story based on Kaia's feelings, her inner world and despair. But there is nothing else going on in terms of plot. I wish this book had more balance between Kaias's inner monologue and the events of the story.

If you liked this book and want something slightly less depressing (and more balanced) you could read My sister lives on the mantelpiece.

[Brandon.D · Rating 3 out of 5]

I didn't expect to read this book and like it. This normally isn't the type of book I read the voice in the book was really good. The story was interesting in the way it showed the world kaia lived. There are a few things that I personally didn't like. The ending wasn't satisfying to me. I wished that it had more closure to the story. Something else I liked about the story was the characters. With the characters I could tell what their personalities are like. Overall I only liked this book

[SpartanEFR · Rating 4 out of 5]

The book was great. Being in the perspective of a young girl, Kaia, who is going through problems in her life, at home, and at school. The one thing that I didn't really like was that the ending was dull, and some things that happened throughout the book never came to an end. The ending also happened suddenly, I find that it wasn't at a good time. But, it is still a good read.

[Abi Elphinstone · Rating 5 out of 5]

At last Moontrug feels it’s time to write about Tom Avery’s book, My Brother’s Shadow. She’s put it off for a while now – not because it was boring, not because it was badly written – but because she was so profoundly moved by it that she had to spend a few weeks just thinking about its strange, subtle magic. Because that’s the way it is with some books. They strike a cord somewhere deep inside you and you spend weeks after mesmerised by that magic. And that’s how it was with My Brother’s Shadow.

My Brother’s Shadow is Kaia’s story. Her world of books, friends and laughter is shattered the day she comes home to find her brother dead. Something inside Kaia hardens until gradually she finds herself totally alone. Friends drift, teachers become impatient and her mother’s erratic behaviour leaves her frightened and desperate. Kaia freezes up inside and only when a mysterious boy appears at the window of her classroom, do things start to change.

My Brother’s Shadow reminded Moontrug of Patrick Ness’ brilliant book, A Monster Calls. Avery relates the aching process of coming to terms with loss just as acutely (and subtly) as Ness does. With Avery, Kaia’s inner pain is manifested in the wild boy’s actions: ‘He was really wild. Whilst I dream of leaping on tables, he did it, howling at the ceiling. When the class cackled at one of Mr Wills’ stupid jokes, the boy looked around perplexed then clapped and barked out an imitation of a laugh. He tore books apart, chewed at pencils, bolted in and out of the classroom.’ But amidst this pain, there is a sense of hope, beauty and wonder in both Ness’ and Avery’s writing. Avery’s references to the renewing power of nature – to the wonderfulness of trees, sunflowers and daffodils – are a constant reminder that although the human spirit may be crushed to breaking point, there is hope and strength somewhere deep inside us all. It reminded Moontrug of a wise Anglo-Saxon saying her mother often tells her when things get tough: ‘Let the spirit grow stronger, courage the greater, will the more resolute, as the strength grows less.’

Kaia is such an engaging character. Her mind works in brilliant, original ways, like David Almond’s wonderful Mina. Kaia knows ‘it’s rude to stare’ but when she notices the ‘amazing, unique, miraculous’ people in the world, she asks us how can we not just stare and marvel at ‘every single stupendous one of them.’ Kaia’s way of thinking is captivating and Moontrug would love to amble along inside her mind, to see the world like she does, to run on silent feet, to soar through blue skies with wild animals… Because, as Kaia says, ‘wild thoughts are what make us feel alive.’

The ‘relationship’ between Kaia and the wild boy is beautifully told: ‘…he’s there with me. We trot together. Tears run as silent as the boy’s footfall. We do not speak. We walk.’ Avery captures the subtle magic of the wild boy’s role so perfectly, gradually releasing Kaia towards a thawing, a freedom from all that’s happened: ‘Finally, with a second wail, despair in its voice, the building falls in on itself. A great cloud of dust rises into the air. We shield our eyes. When it settles we’re all that’s left: us and the tree against our backs. I laugh, not at the destruction, but at the freedom.’ Kaia develops a wisdom more important, more lasting, than algebra and descriptions of imaginary trainers, and Avery very realistically shows how it is sometimes in grief that we find out who we really are.

Perhaps one of the things Avery does best is to capture Kaia’s moments of triumph. Her Special Achiever Award is brilliantly done – and Kaia’s reaction so painfully real. And like Kaia’s class, Moontrug read her book review with tears streaming down her face. My Brother’s Shadow is a heart-breakingly good book for 9+ years, so good that it’s made its way onto Moontrug’s Altocumulus Tower…

[Tammy · Rating 3 out of 5]

2.5 stars

To put it simply, this book just didn’t quite work for me. I can see how others will see beauty in it, but it left me not necessarily confused, but curious. Honestly, I’ve been hanging onto this review for a couple of weeks, attempting to pull some sort of thoughts together that won’t include spoilers.

Kaia is battling severe grief at the loss of her brother. Her mother is battling her own depression, so she’s been no help through the journey. One day Kaia meets a “wild boy”, and things start changing.

The “wild boy” was different than I expected. I "got" what was supposed to be happening, but at the same time I didn't really "get" it, if that makes sense. I thought this book was going to be in the fantasy category, maybe even in the “ghost” category. (That said, I like going into a book knowing the least amount as possible, and highly skim reviews when deciding on a book.) I’d very much label it as realistic, though. I just didn’t like the way the “boy” was dealt with in the story. I wish things had been made clearer in the end. I think the author had a definite “plan” as far as the “wild boy” goes, but I guess the reader could decide for themselves which direction they chose. Really, I don’t know a single child that I’d recommend this book to, or adult, for that matter, though. It’s just a sad, odd little book. If a child had saw what Kaia saw concerning her brother, I don’t think reading this story would help them, but I could be wrong. (It wouldn’t be the first time.) There are “violent”(for lack of a better description) parts to the story, though, and I can’t recommend it for sensitive children.

I think more than anything, I went into this book with my expectations too high. I kept seeing high praise, and what I thought was a “middle grade fantasy set in London” pulled me in. Based on the high praise of others, definitely give this book a chance, though, if a middle grade “grief” story, with some unique plot lines interests you. Just be careful handing this book over to a child.

*I was provided a review copy in exchange for my honest opinion.

[Adele Broadbent · Rating 4 out of 5]

Kaia’s world has fallen apart since she lost her beloved older brother Moses. She tells the reader she is frozen inside, and so is her mum. Somehow she has to find her way back to how she was before - back to her friends, her good grades and some sort of happiness. Her mum is frozen too, so she has to travel this journey alone - until a strange wild mute boy who arrives at school....

This sad story shows the gradua 'thawing' of Kaia with a wonderful conclusion.

[Brittany · Rating 4 out of 5]

11 year old Kaia deals with the loss of her brother, who she found after he committed suicide. This book does an amazing job of showing the grieving process without being too emotionally dense or graphic. The journal-style of the book also makes this a great hi-lo read, especially for those readers looking for a more sensitive topic.

[Garnett Pugh · Rating 5 out of 5]

If I could give this more than five stars, I would do so. Though this book was written for middle schoolers, both teens and adults (I'm 78) can embrace this very moving story of how eleven year old Kaia , who was dealt an immense loss in her young life, got through the grieving process.

[Elizabeth Beverley · Rating 4 out of 5]

I really enjoyed this, it was beautifully written and you felt like you actually went on the emotional journey with Kaia.

[ayşnr._.r · Rating 3 out of 5]

“We should be allowed to stare at everybody. We should be made to stare at everybody. All these incredible people and we’re not allowed to stare. It’s madness.”

Sanırım artık çocuk kitapları okumaya çok az ara vereceğim. Sanki şu koskoca dünyada koskoca hayal dünyanızın içinde başka konu yok aynı şeyi yazıp duruyorsunuz. YA türlerinde –özellikle çocuk kitabı kısmına girenlerde- kaybedilen birinin arkasından yazılan bir konu var. Bu konu da 3 adıma ayrılıyor.

Birinci adım; herkesten nefret etme, başkaları ile konuşmama hatta direk hiç konuşmama, bir zamanlar en yakın arkadaş olunan insanlarla artık göz göze bile gelmeme, yemekler de tek başına oturma hatta istenilirse evden getirilen yemeği tuvalette yemek, tercihen ortaya atılan yakışıklı-gizemli bir çocuk falan filan… Tabi bunların hepsi lise 1-4 aralığında geçecek. Herkesten nefret eden kahramanımız abisini/ablasını/en yakın arkadaşını/büyük annesini falan kaybetmiştir. Bunun üzerine bunalıma girer ve yukarıda saydığım şeylerin hepsi olur. Zorbaları unutmuşum pardon..

İkinci adımda; kahramanımız yakışıklı çocuk ile yanlışlıkla koridorda çarpışır. Ya da başka bir şekilde muhakkak kader onları birleştirir. Atıyorum merhaba kelimesi yerine en şatafatlı cümleler kurarlar, “güzelim ben seni anlıyorum ben de yaralıyım aslında” tavırlarında gezerler. Kahramanımız çocuğa aşık olur Bir bakmışız kahraman depresyondan çıkıyor ve “iyileşme” sürecine doğru tırmanıyor. Bizde “yaa ne kadar güzel” diye okuyoruz. Kahramanın evde ki durumları da bu şekilde aslında. Aşık olduğu için evde anne ya da babası “tatlım böyle gülmeni özlemişim” triplerine girerler. Kahramanımız ise “ah kapayın çenenizi, lütfen şimdi gidip benden başka şeylerle uğraşın böylece gece 2’de evden rahatlıkla kaçabileyim” der. Yakışıklı çocuğun acayip cool arkadaşlarından bahsetmiş miydim? İşte onlar kahramanımızı evden kaçırmaya gelen tayfa.

Üçüncü adımı ise tahmin edersiniz, kahramanımız tam mutlu olacakken yakışıklı çocuk ona bir yamuk yapar. Ama sorun değil çünkü o çok yakışıklı. Daha fazla uzatmaya gerek yok. Kahramanımız artık iyidir. İyileşmiştir. Kaybının acısı dinmiştir.

Bu 3 adım bugün okuduğum bu kitapta vardı. Yani yüzde 90’ı. Fark ise kahramanımızın 11 yaşında olması. Yakışıklı çocuk olayını ise başka bir gizemli çocuk devraldı. Fakat orası da kocaman bir DRAMA! 11 yaşında ki Kaia abisinin cesedini bulmuştur. Çok sevdiği abisi. Bu yüzden depresyona girer kimseyle konuşmaz. Başta çok sevmeye başlasam da Kaia’nın yazdığı şeyler o kadar acıklı ki biri bu çocuğa sahip çıkmalı diye düşündüm. Yavrucak tek başına ne yapacağını şaşırmış. Tam bu kitabı bitirmeye yakın “Postacı Kapıyı Çalmayacak” kitabına başladım. Orada da konu aynı.. Delireceğim artık cidden.
3 puan verdim lanet olsun ki çok tatlıydı. Hem seviyorum hem nefret ediyorum!

[Sara Houser · Rating 4 out of 5]

My brothers shadow was such a beautiful and sad story. I didn’t care for the authors writing style of this book but I was still able to grasp the concept of the story and follow along. Kaia who is a young girl, who is frozen in time, in life after finding her dead brother.
Kaia feels alone her mother a drunk and her friends have all abandoned her till one day a boy enters her life and over time become the best of friends. This boy doesn’t speak but he helps her over time help her gain her life back. Her friends come back, her mom begins AA meetings and everything is good.

Her best friend this boy and her and a couple other friends have a cycling class, kaia is the happiest since that horrible day. Then CRASH, kaia ends up in a crash in a coma. While in her coma her brother appears to her one last time to say goodbye and sends her back to her life. She awakes sees her cards and everything realizing how much she’s loved once her mother comes and tells her who’s come to see her. Except she asked about the boy and no one knows of this boy

In my opinion the boy was a fragile fragment of her inner selfs fear and loneliness that conjured him up to help her get her life back when she didn’t know how. This story was so beautiful I couldn’t put this book down. Even if you’ve never experienced a death of someone you loved or close to at some point in our lives you have experienced the loneliness and the separation of society and life. Depression is a real thing and for kaia she got through hers with the help of her friend and through her friend helped her mother see the light of her selfishness about not being there for kaia.

This book deserves five stars but because of the writing style I just couldn’t give it five but I loved this and recommend this book to anyone who feels like they just can’t get out of their hole and hope it inspires them and helps them through the hard transition of depression.

[Ella Dovey · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is a beautifully captured, poignant story about loss, grief, death and friendship. The artful playing with tenses, weaving from past to present, the use of simply-put truths (or "rules" as narrator/main character Kaia calls them) like "memories are like a cup of tea- don't hold on too tight" that start each chapter make it an incredibly thought-provoking and emotive read. The diary or journal structure also allows the reader to feel very close to the main character, further developing empathy. There is spectacular use of metaphor, simile, poetry and other imagery.

The main message I got from this book is to remember that we have no idea what people all around us might be going through and how hard it might be for them, and for that reason to always be kind. The power of kindness and friendship is particularly prominent as a theme, as well as the idea that it may take time, and it can't be rushed, but things do constantly change and you will heal. Time as both a stealer and a healer. In the book "growing" is used as a synonym for "healing", which beautifully ties in with the narrator's curious and very apparent love of trees. The puzzlement of the book creates further intrigue and a desire to see the story through- who is the boy who appears in the window? Where has he come from and why doesn't he speak?

This passage from the book accurately and beautifully sums up my experience reading it:

"Tears are strange. Strange because we have sad tears and happy tears, but they're always when the world is too much to bear, an overflow of our emotions, our joy and our sorrow leaking out."

The character and voice is wonderfully strong and completely believable as wise-beyond-her-years 11 year old girl. However, the skill and knowledge and subtlety brought to the writing of this book makes it clear that it is written by someone with a superb grasp of the English language and how it can be used to express the inexpressible.

[Maaike de Vries · Rating 5 out of 5]

De schaduw van mijn broer - Tom Avery
Dit boek verscheen in 2015 en viel me op in een boekwinkeltje een tijd geleden. Het straalde iets uit wat me intrigeerde: een grote boom op de voorkant en een titel die nieuwsgierig maakte. Ik las het dit weekend eindelijk.

Het boek vertelt het verhaal van Kaia. Een intens verdrietig verhaal. Kaia’s grote broer Moses is namelijk plotseling overleden. Kaia vond hem in zijn kamer, in een plas bloed. Een traumatische gebeurtenis waardoor Kaia is bevroren; ze leeft nog, maar alles is ijskoud en onbeweeglijk geworden. Haar moeder, die altijd lief en zorgzaam was, drinkt alleen nog maar veel alcohol en wordt ontslagen op haar werk.

Kaia gaat na een maand rouwen weer naar school. Maar niets is meer hetzelfde. Kaia moet opnieuw vrienden maken, maar dat lukt niet. De enige vriend die ze heeft is een wilde jongen die net nieuw is in de klas. Hij praat niet, maar luistert wel naar haar. Langzaam ontdooit Kaia. Ze durft steeds meer over Moses te praten. Totdat er met haar ook een vreselijk ongeluk gebeurt.

Dit boek is bijzonder om zijn vorm en verhaalopbouw. In het begin raak je in de war van wat er met Kaia aan de hand is. Ze vertelt in warrige zinnen over haar eerste schooldag nadat Moses dood is gegaan. Haar leven voltrekt zich in een grote waas. Je voelt je zelf ook een blok ijs, hard, stijf en niet in staat te bewegen. Langzamerhand wordt de taal soepeler, losser. Je gaat makkelijker begrijpen wat Kaia denkt en doet. Hiermee voel je mee met het grote verdriet. Zo moet het voelen.

Intens verdrietig, een trauma, een groot gemis: teveel voor een kind van 11 jaar. Toch ziet ze ook lichtpuntjes en wil ze door met haar leven. En daardoor is het ook een hoopvol verhaal. Erg mooi gedaan, vooral ook in combinatie met de sombere maar bijzondere illustraties. Geschikt voor 10+.

[Logan S · Rating 3 out of 5]

I think this book was spectacular. Even though I personally would not of picked this for myself I felt like I noticed some things that I would not of realized without reading this book. What I realized is that you can't take things for granted because you never know when you will lose them. This book demonstrated a way on how to grasp the reader into thinking it's a real life situation, which is pretty cool in my opinion. My brother's shadow also showed me that there's a million ways to heal through hard times, so we just got to accept it. Tom Avery used really exciting words and metaphors that really hooked me onto Kaia's life and how deep and meaningful the story actually is. I think that the ending could have been a little better because there were still parts of the story that I really wanted to know what happened that were not included in the ending. Overall My Brother's Shadow was really well written and well spoken story and I personally recommend reading this book, it changed a lot of ways that I look at people and how I looked at life. So I believe that this book will do the same for you.

[Ellie L · Rating 5 out of 5]

This was a fantastic read, a very affecting story that offers an insight into childhood grief and the family, social and inner disconnections that can follow from loss.
Avery appears to be very skillful at writing about challenging topics that are rarely touched upon in children's literature. I adored Not As We Know It, which also tacked some difficult themes, but felt My Brother's Shadow explored something even less talked about and important to understand. Kaia's perspective provided some insights into coping mechanisms that I had not considered, and included some twists which still left me questioning the story I had read at the end.
Aspects of this story make it a difficult to include this text in the primary classroom. Avery does not shy away from some graphic details, which is not necessarily a bad thing, but perhaps makes this tale more suited to KS3 and above. That is, unless there are some very advanced and emotionally ready readers in Year 6, but even then I might still be hesitant.

[Amirah Ishak · Rating 3 out of 5]

This book is about a girl named Kaia, who lost his brother due to suicide and how her whole life changed after the incident. Her mother was an alcoholic, her friends abandoned her at school and she was alone. Well, not completely alone. She befriended with a wild, nameless boy who can't even speak yet he was always they with her.

So here is the thing, the first few pages of the book is quite depressing to me. I had to stop reading for a moment because this book brings my whole mood down. There's no detail explanation about how suicide happens. Well, at least is not triggering enough for me. But I can feel the pain from the character, Kaia. Can you imagine how it feels like when you just lost your beloved brother, and even if you still have your mother but she actually wasn't there?
After all, this story is too simple for me. 160 pages. So you shouldn't expect for more. I couldn't give more stars than this because of the ending. Honestly, I was expecting more. I know things finally turn out good for her but it's not enough for me.

[Dani · Rating 4 out of 5]

Me recordó mucho a Un Monstruo viene a verme. O sea, me encantó. Este libro expresa muy bien lo que sentí cuando alguien a quien amaba mucho se fue, y por eso me encantaría poder decirle al autor a través de este reseña lo mucho que se lo agradezco, porque me hizo sentir por unos minutos comprendida.
Lloré con esta historia, mucho. No profundiza mucho en los personajes, a excepción de la protagonista, claro. También deja muchas cosas inconclusas o abiertas para que el lector las interprete a su modo, lo cual debo ser sincera, no me gustó mucho. Me hubiese gustado que escribiera unas páginas más, que dejará aunque fuera un poco más en claro algunas cosas.
De todos modos lo recomiendo, es un libro corto, lectura fácil y rápida, y si te gustan los libros que te hacen llorar como a mí este es tu libro.

[Thea Armenti · Rating 3 out of 5]

This was quite a compelling book to read, and I really enjoyed it. I love the fact that the author touched on serious topics like suicide and alcoholism since you don't really see that a lot. Kaia's character was extremely interesting. Throughout the book we got to know more about her, and her past. Some parts of the book really pulled at the heartstrings, and that made me feel very attached to her, in a way. The book was very humorous at points which made it feel more fun, and upbeat compared to everything else that was happening. One thing that kind of annoyed me was the overuse of "frozen", which is something Kaia says multiple times throughout the book. Other than that, I really liked this book. I would recommend it to people who can handle serious topics, because this book really is a rollercoaster.