The Missing Piece: A Woman's Guide to Understanding, Diagnosing and Living with ADHD

by Julie Legg

Everything you need to know about recognising and diagnosing ADHD in women, and how to live a full and fulfilling life after When Julie Legg was diagnosed with ADHD at age 52, suddenly her life made sense. Bringing together her own experience along with research studies and personal stories from other Kiwi women with ADHD, this book is a go-to reference no matter where you are in your journey.

It covers the different presentations of ADHD, understanding how the brain works, why girls are underdiagnosed, traits and triggers, the value of an assessment, choosing (or not) medication, freeing yourself from shame, and tips for living and thriving with ADHD.

Dispelling myths and opening a lid on the real experiences of the one-in-twenty women who have found their own missing piece, The Missing Piece is an informative and empowering guide to knowing and loving yourself.

Genres: Nonfiction, Audiobook, Adhd, Mental Health

368 pages, Kindle Edition

Published February 1, 2024

Reviews

[Laura · Rating 5 out of 5]

I actually listened to the audiobook version of this, though that edition is not showing up on Goodreads.

I THOROUGHLY enjoyed this book. Hearing other people's experiences and perspectives has made me feel SO validated, and to use a bit of a cliché, "I felt seen." While some of the information was specific to New Zealanders (information about the assessment and medication processes), overall it was very useful and again, relatable.

This passage hit me the hardest, I think: "There is a great amount of pressure on women to conform to social norms. Living with ADHD often results in our thoughts and behaviors conflicting with our ideals. expectations, both societal and self-generated, can be huge. We want to be the best mother, partner, daughter, worker, friend, and domestic goddess to boot. Yet, undiagnosed, we attempt to do this while struggling with patience, time management, executive function, self-control, emotional dysregulation, and no tools to help us."

Also, the section about friendships...Ooof. Definitely felt that!

This book has DEFINITELY pushed me to have a more in-depth conversation with my therapist about some next steps for an official diagnosis for myself.

[Sam · Rating 4 out of 5]

Changed my life, and would recommend to any women who suspect they might have ADHD.

[Jessica Rush · Rating 5 out of 5]

⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐

First of all, thank you so much to Harper Collins NZ for a copy of this book. It is not the book I usually read, but as I was going through getting diagnosed with ADHD as a 30-year-old female when I saw this I knew I had to read it. This is a 52 kiwi woman's guide to understanding and living with ADHD.

This book is for any woman who has ever thought their minds work a bit differently. This is for the women who have read a statement, or watched a TikTok video of someone pointing out their ADHD symptoms and said HEY! That's me. This book screams everything that has gone through my mind for years. This book is like reading about myself and realising I AM NOT DIFFERENT BECAUSE THERE ARE SO MANY MORE LIKE ME!

I recommend this book because it made me feel seen. This book is perfect for someone just coming to terms with a new diagnosis. It's well-written, is 100% relatable and I think this should be given out to all women who has ADHD.

[Elle · Rating 3 out of 5]

recently got diagnosed with adhd at 26 and reading this was so cathartic and validating to read other women's first hand accounts and knowing that i'm not alone in my grief and anger.

i skimmed past a few chapters since i already have my diagnosis, and some personal stories got repetitive, and i also thought this would be more focused on how to manage adhd but that's kind of my fault for assuming.

it's a good book for people who suspect they have adhd and want reassurance or the courage to seek a diagnosis or if you have a loved one with adhd and want to learn more about how it affects them, but don't read this if you're looking specifically for ways to manage your adhd because this is not that.

[kiki · Rating 5 out of 5]

A must read for any women living with/who believe they may have ADHD. Reading this book felt like a safe space, like the author and interviewees were comforting me, reassuring me that I'm not alone. That my experiences are valid and shared.

This would also be a good read for anyone who has a loved one living with ADHD, and is wanting to understand their experience. This book provides great insight to the challenges people/women with ADHD face, which are so difficult to express to neurotpyical people.

[Jessica · Rating 4 out of 5]

Refreshingly honest, and also framed with the backdrop of a supportive husband, this gives insight to some of the challenges some ADHD brains face - and realism to reflect how you're going on your own without support. Realistically a 3.5 for me as it was more validating than novel, but really happy giving this a 4, especially for readers new to the subject. Would be great to share with family who know little about the disability, on the proviso they comprehend that not every ADHD brain faces the exact same problem or to the same extent.

[Julie · Rating 3 out of 5]

This is a great read if you want to learn more about ADHD with a New Zealand spin. I did like how it wasn't just Legg's experience but many others voices being integrated. I do wish there was more about how to get diagnosed in NZ as there isn't a lot of books that cover this.

Whether you read this for your own needs for to understand a loved one this is a good laughing pad into the journey of ADHD.

[Riri Laurie · Rating 1 out of 5]

A big thank you to Harper Collins NZ for sending me a copy of this for my honest review.
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Unfortunately, this was not one for me. I made it in 20% and decided to DNF it as I was glazing over. It is like reading a textbook.
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I was interested in learning more about the writer and her journey however I felt more like I was doing Homework.

[PJ · Rating 2 out of 5]

If you like reading about other people's experiences in order to feel better about yourself, you will like this book. I was looking for advice, not validation, and the information in this book is no more than you can get from a cursory internet search, so it did not meet my needs.

[Demi Noakes · Rating 4 out of 5]

I appreciated the fact that the book didn’t push a single thread of what ADHD is like but rather included a lot of responses from women interviewed.

Some of the chapters were reeeeeally long which surely should have been thought about when writing a book about ADHD.

[Alana · Rating 4 out of 5]

I loved it! Especially the earlier portions! I appreciated how most of the examples were middle age women of 30 plus and their anecdotes and quotes! I felt so seen! Would strongly recommend to any newly diagnosed x

[ak505 · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book provided some much needed insight into what it’s like to have ADHD as a woman, and it helped me to feel a lot less alone and not lesser than just because I can’t afford to get diagnosed yet.

The anecdotes were diverse and interesting, but in the last third I felt they were too frequent.

I think a section dedicated to medical studies or statistics would’ve been insightful and a good addition to this book.

[Nirvana · Rating 4 out of 5]

Thanks for validation my experiences as a woman diagnosed with ADHD at 27.
Medication doesn't work for me though and for parts of it I still got that imposter syndrome feeling.

[Simon Fraser · Rating 4 out of 5]

bought it to better understand my daughter

An insightful read from someone who is on their journey. It has certainly helped me gain a much better understanding of our daughter. Good read for family members and friends

[Lynette · Rating 5 out of 5]

Excellent book. Up to date information. Many, many people totally misunderstand the symptoms of this illness.