Friends for Life

by Meg Wolitzer

From the author of This Is Your Life--made into a successful film--comes a funny, human comedy about the lives and loves of three best friends. Originally united by a fifth grade project, now, 20 years later, the "girls" still meet for dinner once a month. Nora Ephron will direct a film version of Friends for Life.

Genres: Fiction, Chick Lit

Hardcover

First published January 1, 1994

About the author

Meg Wolitzer is the New York Times–bestselling author of The Interestings, The Uncoupling, The Ten-Year Nap, The Position, The Wife, and Sleepwalking. She is also the author of the young adult novel Belzhar. Wolitzer lives in New York City.

Reviews

[Olive Fellows (abookolive) · Rating 3 out of 5]

Click here to hear my thoughts on this book over on my Booktube channel, abookolive!


Not sure how this is Wolitzer's lowest rated book here on Goodreads when her weakest (in my opinion) is This is Your Life. That book was about a standup comic and even the jokes in Friends For Life are better.

Basically this is about three friends who have known each other since grade school: Meredith, Ann, and Lisa. Meredith and Ann don't care for each other much and the friendship between the three of them will be tested by the addition of romantic partners and kids as they all approach 30. There are whiffs of what Wolitzer would do in The Interestings in here, what with the idea of friendships undergoing chances as everyone gets older, but she clearly needed more time before getting to that sophisticated of a novel. This was a decent enough book - with parts that haven't aged the greatest, granted - but it's nothing all that memorable.

[Kaitlyn Redwine · Rating 2 out of 5]

I didn’t particularly love the plot of this book, and it was nothing like I expected. But at the same time, I read it in one sitting so I’m conflicted. I appreciated the premise, sorta. It’s probably a 2.8 but I rounded down bc I’m brutal.

[Rachel · Rating 4 out of 5]

My least favorite of the Wolitzer books that I read this month, not to say that I didn't enjoy it! But I didn't think it went much deeper than that, either.

Meredith, Lisa and Ann are friends from childhood who, in their late twenties, continue to meet monthly (or more than monthly) as their lives take different paths in New York. First it's just career paths, but as their romantic lives become more serious, suddenly the group feels more threatened.

Dr. Lisa marries colleague Eric, a bit of a bore, though her friends don't tell her this opinion until they're in the middle of marital (plus baby) discord. Editorial assistant Ann comes out of the closet, or really it feels like a more organic sexual awakening, as her latest, tepid straight romance falls away and she gets involved with a charismatic woman. Meredith stays the same for the longest amount of time--gunning for her own spot on public television to sprout off opinions on appliances, getting involved with inappropriate men, and being so darn attractive that she's constantly sent free food at restaurants and her therapist won't treat her because he's attracted to her. :P It got slightly over the top sometimes.

Maybe the most interesting part about this book was that it took place in the early nineties, I'm assuming based on publication date, and tackled that social world. Aids tests are still big for everyone, especially promiscuous young adults. The idea of lesbians, apparently, is just beginning to be explored in sitcoms, should the women be feminine enough; meanwhile Ann's parents have a private conniption fit about family gossip. Lesbianism is still, at least in this book, seen by most as "a lifestyle choice." And perhaps I just grew up with different role models, but I found it a little shocking for Ann's mother to poo-poo close, individual female friendships. Her daughter comes to her with the update that a friend from childhood has dumped her, and the woman's response is, "so what, you're in a romantic relationship now. That's the only one that matters!"

Wolitzer writes so often and so well about female relationships that I wonder if she's standing against the societal norms of her young adulthood.

But on the other side of the coin, these women did seem to have little in common anymore. Or maybe it's the fact that their relationship is based on ever-fading childhood memories (Wolitzer particularly makes use of a jaunty song that the girls made up about their friendship ages ago.) Though I suppose its inaccurate to say they share nothing in common in the present, because they still invite each other into each other's lives. The other person may not have lived the same experiences, but they still provide listening ears. I'm really fascinated by, and have a lot of personal feelings about these sorts of relationships; I feel like many women around me have them, but I have difficulty staying in close, constant contact myself. :/ I got invested in the middling dynamics here, for subjective reasons.

It's interesting how Lisa kind of held the friendship together, so of course she had to be the one to leave it for a time. I wish this was explored slightly more thoroughly, though I do think that Wolitzer set up Lisa's "nice girl" attitude (and her resentment about it) and Meredith and Ann's stubborn, occasional pig-headedness. I do think that Meredith came off as slightly too vain and shallow sometimes. Ann, on the other hand, was endearing as my Jewish and LGBTQ representation. :P I appreciated what Wolitzer probed with her unpracticed religion, and the juxtaposition of her new, political life with her old, middle class, suburban associations. But at the end of the day, this book was too short and sweet--charming but not deep.

[Rebekkah · Rating 2 out of 5]

The completist in my decided that it would be a good idea to check out Meg Wolitzer's first book, and read through her novels in chronological order, since I enjoyed The Position and The Interestings so much.

This book really did nothing for me as a book. However, it was pretty interesting to see where she started in her published writing, and where it got her later. The seeds are definitely here, but this book pales in comparison to the others I've read, and was fairly forgettable.

[Sue Kozlowski · Rating 3 out of 5]

Okay, kind of tacky. Three women in NYC are friends. Lisa marries a doctor, Meredith is beautiful, Ann decides to be a lesbian. Tells what its like after one gets married and has a baby. Read this twice.

[Karen Hogan · Rating 2 out of 5]

A comedy about three young woman in NYC, who have known each other since 5th grade and still meet monthly to share their stories. Easy to read, and funny in certain parts, but not a page turner.

[june3 · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book is charmingly dated but a fun and heartfelt read.

[Christie Bane · Rating 4 out of 5]

I read this book in one day, mostly standing in the lines at Magic Kingdom. It was the ideal size for that type of reading, and didn't really require total mental focus. This book is the story of three women who have been friends since childhood, and are now adults living in Manhattan. There is nothing at all profound about this book, but it is still a charming book that reminds you that the normal human feelings you have are normal. I love Meg Wolitzer's writing even when it's telling a light, sort of shallow story.

[B. · Rating 3 out of 5]

This book did not age well. That being said, it does provide a snapshot of sociocultural life during the 90s, so it was kind of like a walk down memory lane. However, in spite of this, there's not a true point to this story - there's no real plot, just character development. I kept reading, expecting something to happen, and nothing really did. It's just three women, living their lives in the 90s, floating through their respective existences.

[Maureen · Rating 1 out of 5]

I'm 40 pages in and I'm going to stop reading this book. If you knew me, you'd know this is a huge thing because I never stop reading a book once I've started. I don't like the writing style, I find the conversation contrived and I can't stand any of the predictable, cookie-cutter, insipid characters. I do not care in the least what happens to any of them. So I'm not going to read it...

[Kelly · Rating 2 out of 5]

Probably my fault for not paying attention to the publication year of this book but I felt there was a lot of outdated language and viewpoints, particularly around sexuality. Overall, I found the focal relationships really disappointing for a book about female friendship and there also felt like a pretty severe lack of independence and self respect from the 3 women.

[Merrie Satran · Rating 4 out of 5]

A good beach read. I must admit it helped that the main character was named Meredith :)

[Jack Goodstein · Rating 5 out of 5]

Excellent read.

[Melissa Morrissey · Rating 4 out of 5]

Somewhat dated but still enjoyable.

[Grace · Rating 2 out of 5]

if this is out of print i can see why lol

[Kathleen · Rating 4 out of 5]

Written in 1994, this novel of three women, friends since the fifth grade, reflects their life as they are about to turn 30. And perhaps even with the passing of twenty years, the concerns and questions and fears of women are still the same as are the challenges of a long friendship that must evolve with the women. Despite different personalities and interests and varied professions, the three women are bonded by all they shared as children, adolescents and 20 something’s; they readily admit they might not have forged a friendship if they had met after college. Yet, Wolitzer demonstrates there is something to be relished about these relationships beyond memories of sleepovers and favorite songs. I love Wolitzer’s humor, her touches of irony, her ability to hold up a mirror to our political activist/work for social justice/intellectual selves and even self-absorption for some reality testing. This is only my second time reading this author, and I’ll be back.

[Betsy Brainerd · Rating 2 out of 5]

Not as good as "The Ten Year Nap" by Meg Wolitzer. More of a beach/summer read. (Or when you ought to be doing something else but you do want to know how it ends so you skim to the end read). Three friends in NYC have relationship problems. One is classically beautiful but self-centered, one is the "nice" girl/Dr., and the third discovers she is a lesbian (which is good because none of the guys were really cutting it).

[Melissa · Rating 2 out of 5]

a bit of a let down. i really liked "the wife
and look forward to reading "the ten year nap." it really bothers me that i can't figure out how to italicize.
anway, it touches on some interesting issues of friends shifts and such, but more could've happened i guess. maybe more "stuff" would have made this more interesting. though some touched some nerves which is always a good thing.

[Pascale · Rating 3 out of 5]

Having started reading Meg Wolitzer with "The Wife", I guess I was bound to find this earlier book more lightweight. This falls pretty squarely in the chick-lit category, but it is very, very superior chick-lit, thanks to Wolitzer's keen eye for detail and wonderful sense of humor. Even if this isn't the deepest analysis of female friendship ever written, it's a jolly pleasant ride.

[Annalisa · Rating 2 out of 5]

Post-modern psycho-drivel followed by an atypical happy ending in this would-be chic lit littered with unrelatable characters that put Seinfeld to shame. But- compelling enough that I actually finished it, which is saying something.

[Cherie · Rating 4 out of 5]

A Really good Wolitzer; three young women, close friends, are living their confusing and hectic lives in Manhattan, growing up: men, career, honesty, love, friendship. I relate to these women in how friends become a solid substitute for family. Great writing, wonderful story.

[Laura · Rating 4 out of 5]

I thought I wouldn't like this book.
I loved it! It's New York in the early 90s and 3 girlfriends are becoming adults after college.
A really lovely testament to female friendship..
However, before you read it, it is dated!!

[Syd · Rating 3 out of 5]

I like how Wolitzer flushes out characters and this novel did a good job of communicating the many conflicting emotions of long standing relationships.

[M · Rating 1 out of 5]

Pathetic.

[Irving]

Enjoyable.

[Claire · Rating 3 out of 5]

Reminded me of my own friendships. Very relatable but not very interesting or exciting. Would recommend if you like your life reflected back at you, which I sometimes do!

[Rashmi Tiwari · Rating 2 out of 5]

Another Meg Wolitzer. This one an early one. It's a beach read. Or an airplane read. Nothing to see here. Engaging for what it is but not worth seeking out at all.

[Andrea Chow · Rating 4 out of 5]

Tacky, cliche, stupid, but I freakin' loved it. Hell, I finished it in a few hours. What's happening to me

[Jeannie · Rating 3 out of 5]

Wolitzer writes interesting characters but doesn't really get deep enough with any of them to move them beyond the caricature state. Another book I had high hopes for but was left feeling "meh".

[Randi Daeger · Rating 4 out of 5]

Meg Wolitzer writes so well......always enjoyable.